mentor and mentee tool kit...the mentor and mentee should be careful not to isolate or neglect...

Mentor and Mentee Tool Kit

Mentoring Overview

Benefits of Mentoring to the Mentor / Mentee and Organisation: Benefits to Organisation • Strengthened capacity • Eased transition periods for new members • Attraction and retention of members • Creation of alliances and partnerships • Enhanced commitment of members to the organization • Creation of a culture of organizational citizenship • Enhanced leadership capacity within the organization. • Succession planning: Mentees become mentors and leaders • Alliances with decision makers are created Benefits to Mentors • Professional development • Increased confidence • Reflective thinking • Learning from mentees about new information and trends • Enhanced career and personal satisfaction • Contribution to discipline and next generation • Enhanced managerial skills • Enhanced leadership skills • Inspirational and rejuvenating effect of interaction with enthusiastic

mentee Benefits to Mentees • Establishment of networks • Enhanced career development and opportunities • Enhanced sense of security and reduced stress • Skill and knowledge development • Enhanced insight into organizational culture • Receipt of guidance, support and feedback • Leadership skills development. Increased upward mobility, career

satisfaction, access to resources, opportunities to work with decision makers

At the First Session

Task to be complete Mentee Mentor

Contracting / outlining the relationship meeting.

Identify and outline specific learning goals from the relationship

Define expectations.

Determine accountability measures.

Establish ground rules including how to manage closure.

Defining and maintaining confidentiality.

Establishing protocols to work through difficult situations.

Discuss follow-up.

Sessions and actions.

Confirm time frames / Frequency of meetings

Ownership and accountability

Preparation, before the session and accountability after the session

What documents do I need for the sessions?

Mentor Mentee

Mentoring Time Log Mentee Preparation Sheet. (to be sent to Mentor before the session)

Mentoring Session Framework. (To be used in the session)

Mentoring Session Worksheet. (To be used in the session)

Mentee Session Framework. (To be used in the session) Mentoring Time Log

Mentor Partnership Evaluation Form Mentee Partnership Evaluation Form

Some hints and tips on questions to ask during a session

Mentor

Goal Questions in the sessions: • What is it you would like to discuss? • What would you like to achieve? • What would you like from (to achieve in) this session? • What would need to happen for you to walk away feeling that this time

was well spent? • If I could grant you a wish for this session, what would it be? • What would you like to be different when you leave this session? • What would you like to happen that is not happening now or what would

you like not to happen that is happening now? • What outcome would you like from this session/discussion/interaction? • Is that realistic? • Can we do that in the time we have available? • Will that be of real value to you?

Reality Questions – Checking understanding • What is happening at the moment? • How do you know that this is accurate? • When does this happen? • How often does this happen? Be precise if possible • What effect does this have? • How have you verified, or would you verify, that this is so? • What other factors are relevant? • Who else is relevant? • What is their perception of the situation? • What have you tried so far? Options Questions – Big picture thinking • What could you do to change the situation? • What alternatives are there to that approach? • Tell me about what possibilities for action you see. Do not worry about

whether they are realistic at this stage. • What approach/actions have you seen used, or used yourself, in similar

circumstances? • Who might be able to help? • Would you like suggestions from me? • Which options do you like the most? • What are the benefits and pitfalls of these options? • Which options are of interest to you? • Rate from 1 – 10 your interest level in/the practicality of each of these

options? • Would you like to choose an option to act on? Wrap-up Questions – At end of session

• What are the next steps? • Precisely when will you take them? • What might get in the way? • Do you need to log the steps in your diary? • What support do you need? • How and when will you enlist that support?

Hints for dealing with difficult situations

• Acknowledge the conflict – make it overt • Identify the real conflict – what is the real issue, ask questions • Listen actively to all points of view • Explore and generate ways of resolving the conflict. Aim for a win-win

solution rather than win-lose • Select a solution and clarify responsibilities • Schedule a follow-up • Avoid getting personal and vindictive – be assertive if you need to • Keep your voice low and calm • Use “I” messages and ask questions for clarification and reflection • Express appreciation and use empathy • Listen and observe non-verbal signals • Empathy: ensure that the other person’s feelings and opinions are

acknowledged and respected • Ask for clarification: ensure that you fully understand their position and

reasoning by asking questions, rephrasing and echoing what they have said

• Stay calm: breathe deeply and slowly, focus on staying in adult mode • Prepare yourself: gather all the facts and any details such as figures or

examples to support your case • Compromise: Don’t wait for the other person to “give in”. Strive for a

win-win situation and don’t be tempted to rush to a quick ego victory.

Mentee Preparation Sheet

Mentee Name: Date:

Challenges/Topics I would like to explore in the session

How to:

How to:

How to:

The Green Zone The Red Zone

Issues in the Green Zone: Issues in the Red Zone:

• •

• •

Steps I can take to tackle these issues are: Steps I can take to tackle these

issues are:

• •

• •

Any other thoughts around challenges/topics I would like to explore in the session based on my preparation?

How to:

Mentee Session Worksheet

Mentee Name: Date: Mentor Name: Duration of Session:

The Challenges / Agenda for the Session:

Actions to take for the next Session

Incomplete from previous Session?

Insights during the Session

Mentoring Time Log

Date Phone/ Face to

face

Duration (min)

Session no. Comments

Mentee Partnership Evaluation Form

Mentee Name:

Mentor Name:

Date:

Hours Spent: Please explain in your own words how you experienced the mentoring process

What was the personal value you gained from the mentoring experience?

What was the value you believe the organisation gained as a result of the mentoring you received?

Three things you want to acknowledge yourself for

Three things you want to acknowledge your mentor for

Three pieces of specific feedback for your mentor

What, if anything would have made the mentoring experience better?

Mentor Partnership Evaluation Form

Mentor Name:

Mentee Name:

Date:

Hours Spent: What were the specific things you learned and gained from being a mentor?

What was the personal value you believe the mentee gained from the mentoring experience?

What was the value you believe the organisation gained as a result of the mentoring?

Three things you want to acknowledge yourself for

Three things you want to acknowledge your mentee for

What do you think you could do better next time? And How?

Responsibilities of Mentors and Mentees

The Mentor

Criteria Rights Responsibilities

Sufficient time available to devote to the trainee Setting limits Developing the Mentee

Ability to communicate on matters outside the working environment

Respect from the Mentee Fair treatment

Meet deadlines and goals

Honesty from the Mentee Honesty

Ability to evaluate progress

Support from the Mentee Consistency

Ability to transfer skills effectively Resources Support

Committed to support and interact with Mentee(s)

Access to the Mentee Fair reporting if needed

Recognise excellence in others and encourage it

To terminate the relationship

Liaison with Mentee’s manager

Communicate effectively with others

Feedback from the Mentee Maintaining confidentiality

A sense of humour, Ability and desire to nurture other people

Being available

Effective listening, communication and problem solving skills

Measuring achievements

Willingness to impart knowledge

Creating a learning plan / career plan, Setting Limits

The Mentee

Criteria Rights Responsibility

Achieved a Performance rating of a 3.5 or more

Collaboration in the formulation of a development plan

Commitment

Noted as up and coming talent

Respect from the Mentor Full participation

Individual has a desire to be challenged and grow

Accessibility Positive interest in self development

Has the desire to have a mentor

To terminate the relationship Honesty

Effective listening, communication and problem solving skills

Feedback Providing information

Is development focused Face to face contact

Sound advice and guidance

Confidentiality

Undivided attention during consultations

Mentoring Trouble-Shooting Toolbox

Mentor Pitfalls (problems caused by the mentor)

Pitfalls

Solutions

Overprotection Realise that your role is not to protect the mentee from usual feedback that is hard but rather to develop the mentee

Ego: the relationship is more important than the mentor

Refocus yourself by concentrating on the development of the mentee and not on yourself

Cloning: “Mini me syndrome”

Respect the individuality of the mentee and focus on his/her development needs according to potential and not your preferences or personality

Ask the questions: “Am I trying to mould a mini me?”

Cultural domination Learn as much as possible about the mentee’s culture and respect it. Do not enforce your own cultural beliefs

Work overload Be realistic in terms of the mentee’s workload

Lack of flexibility

Always think of new ways of achieving development and learning.

Adapt your style according to changing business needs and realities.

Realise that your style of learning might be different from your mentee and accommodate for that.

Being too nice

Rather be firm, direct and straight to the point so that mentee gets honest feedback & the opportunity to learn from mistakes. Live by this Emotionally intelligent adage:-

It’s not what you say...It’s how you say it!

It’s not what you do....It’s how you do it!

Being too strict

Be realistic and balance in terms of your expectations, objectives & approach

Ask the question: “Am I a perfectionist and how can this drive to rigid types of expectations and behaviours?”

Mentee Pitfalls (Problems caused by the mentee)

Pitfalls

Solutions

Manipulation Make it clear to the mentee that you see the manipulation and that you will not tolerate it. Set clear parameters for the relationship. Should the mentee continue with manipulation, terminate the relationship

Hand-Outs The mentee must realise that there are no hand-outs in mentoring. A good challenging task with a right deadline will send a clear message that there will be no hand-outs

Jealousy The mentor and mentee should be careful not to isolate or neglect other employees or behave in such a manner that feelings of jealousy are encouraged

Unrealistic expectations

A clear mentoring contract, as well as open communication about realistic objectives will set the scene for a balanced mentoring programme

Dependency The mentor should help the mentee understand that the purpose of mentoring is to enable the mentee to develop in such a way that independence is achieved at the end of the relationship

Under-performance

If the mentee does not perform, organise a meeting to discuss under-performance.

Ask mentee to generate possible solutions to improve performance. Based on these ideas set clear targets for performance improvement.

If mentee struggles to generate solutions recommend possible solutions and get mentee to commit to choosing a particular course of action. This increases commitment and accountability towards performance improvement.

Provide the necessary support and resources

Relationship Pitfalls (Problems caused by both parties)

Pitfalls

Solutions

Intimate friendship

Be a good friend but make sure that the mentoring relationship takes precedence over the friendship.

Define parameters of the relationship

Unequal relationship

The mentee should be treated as an equal.

Show respect and encouragement.

The higher the sense of equality, the better the chances for open communication

Isolating the Manager Keep the line manager on board!

Organise period discussion sessions with the line manager

Too formal a programme

Encourage parties to identify opportunities for informal mentoring

Ensure that the mentoring programme is not too structured or rigid

Too informal a programme Give some structure to the programme by creating a mentoring policy and strategy

Monitor & review the success of the programme

Conflict Have an open discussion about the conflict and reach consensus on a solution

Diversity problems Learn about the other party’s culture and demonstrate sensitivity & respect

Confidentiality issues Both parties must commit to confidentially when discussing sensitive issues, policy documents or other people that affect the relationship

Incorrect matching Do a proper assessment to ensure that mentors and mentees are correctly matched

Untrained parties Conduct a mentoring training programme for both parties

mentor and mentee tool kit...the mentor and mentee should be careful not to isolate or neglect...

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