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TIDBITS® LOOKS AT THE THANKSGIVING HOLIDAY

by Kathy Wolfe

This week, Tidbits focuses on one of the na-tion’s favorite holidays, declared a national holiday by Abraham Lincoln in 1863.

A fortune-telling chicken gave us the start •to the tradition of breaking the wishbone at Thanksgiving. Over 2,400 years ago, the Etruscan people inhabited the Italian peninsula, and believed a strange super-stition related to their 20-letter alphabet. Drawing a circle in the dirt, these early Ital-ians divided it into 20 wedges, and placed a kernel of grain in each wedge, depicting each letter. As a hen nibbled at the pieces,

a holy man was transcribing the letters in order. The high priest was called upon to interpret the chicken’s peck-ing order. A dead chicken’s collarbone was revered as sa-cred, and after

drying out in the sun, the unbroken bone was held by the superstitious Etruscans as they made a wish. When the Romans be-gan practicing this unusual custom, they came to blows over the bones, breaking them. The practice evolved into the hold-er of the larger piece being granted their wish. Tradition states that our saying “I need a lucky break” or “I never get a break” were the result of this ritual. The Romans passed along the superstition to the Eng-lish, who brought it to the New World, and, with the abundance of turkeys in the area, transferred the practice to the native fowl.The dinner table isn’t the only place you’ll •findawishboneonThanksgivingDay.Youmight see one during the after-dinner foot-ball game, if the offensive line of your team uses a wishbone formation. This occurs when the quarterback surges forward, fol-lowed by the fullback, with a halfback on each of his sides. The appearance of these four players gives the appearance of an in-verted“Y”,muchlikethebird’sclavicle.

continued on page 3!

Issue #1113November 16, 2009

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ARIES (March 21 to April 19) A long-sought workplace change could be happening soon. Consider reworking your ideas and preparing a presentation just in case. A personal rela-tionship takes a new turn.TAURUS (April 20 to May 20)Yourpersua-siveness doesn’t really start to kick in until midweek. By then, you can count on having more supporters in your camp, including some you doubted would ever join you. GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) Yourworkloadisstill high, but -- good news! -- you should start to see daylight by the week’s end. Reserve the weekend for fun and games with friends andlovedones.Youdeserveit.CANCER (June 21 to July 22) Regardless of how frustrating things are, keep that “Crab” under control. A cutting comment you might think is apt right now will leave others hurting for a long time to come.LEO (July 23 to August 22) Be more sensi-tive to the emotions of loved ones who might feel left out while you’re stalking that new op-portunity. Be sure to make it up to them this weekend. A nice surprise could be waiting.VIRGO (August 23 to September 22) The gregarious Virgo rarely has a problem making new friends. But repairing frayed relationships doesn’t come easily. Still, if it’s what you want todo,you’llfindaway.Goodluck.LIBRA (September 23 to October 22) A mis-understanding with a partner or spouse needs to be worked out before it turns into something really nasty. Forget about your pride for now andmakethatfirsthealingmove.SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21) Communication dominates the week. Work out any misunderstandings with co-workers. Also get back in touch with old friends and those family members you rarely see.SAGITTARIUS (November 22 to December 21) As busy as your week is, make time for someonewhofeelsshutoutofyourlife.Youract of kindness could later prove to be more significantthanyoumighthaverealized.CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19) Congratulations. Your busy workweek leadsto some very satisfying results. Sports and sporting events are high on your weekend activities aspect. Enjoy them with family and friends.AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18) Your generosity of spirit reaches out onceagain to someone who needs reassurance. There might be problems, but keeping that line of communication open eventually pays off.PISCES (February 19 to March 20) Youareamong the truth-seekers in the universe, so don’tbesurprisedtofindyourselfcaughtupin a new pursuit of facts to counter what you believe is an insidious exercise in lying.BORN THIS WEEK:Youbelieveinloyaltyandin keeping secrets. All things considered, you would probably make a perfect secret agent.

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Don’t wait until the end of December to do ayear-endfinancialreview.Thisisagoodtime to begin developing new habits that will help you save money next year. Here are some ideas:Utility bills: If you had a goal this year of re-ducing your utility expenses by always turn-ing off lights and lowering the thermostat, did you do it? If your savings weren’t what you expected because you didn’t always follow through, set a goal for next year. Notch the thermostat down a degree or two and turn off lights you’re not using until it becomes an easy habit.Cell phones: If you’re on a monthly plan that gives you a certain number of minutes for a set price, chances are you use up those minutes because they’re there. You cansave money, however, by changing to an inexpensive phone with pre-paid minutes that you refill as needed.Your cell phoneusage is likely to go down when you con-sider that each call is costing you a nickel or a dime per minute. The initial savings: no monthly bill. Additional savings: fewer min-utes used.Grocerycoupons:Youhavetodothework-- cut them out of the paper, plan meals around items that are covered by the cou-pons -- but there is serious money to be saved using grocery coupons. Investigate onlinecouponsites,too.(Generateathrow-away e-mail address for those sites requir-ing that you sign up.) Check with your local store before you present them with printed coupons. Some stores won’t take them. Pay attention to expiration dates. Rule of thumb: Don’t be tempted to buy food your family won’t eat just because it looks like a good deal.Salesflyers,adsandInternetcomparison:Getinthehabitoflookingattheflyersandads in the newspaper. Compare any intend-edpurchasestowhatyoufindonline.Plus,a local store with a Web site might list spe-cials that never show up in a print ad.Think used: Check thrift shops for mer-chandise in good condition. You can findclothing, furniture, tools, books, children’s games, housewares and much more at very low prices. Take some steps now, and you’ll be posi-tioned to start the New Year with bettermoney-saving habits.David Uffington regrets that he cannot person-ally answer reader questions, but will incor-porate them into his column whenever pos-sible. Write to him in care of King Features Weekly Service, P.O. Box 536475, Orlando, FL 32853-6475, or send e-mail to [email protected].

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Tidbits® - Denver Metro Area November 16, 2009

Antarctica is the only continent where •pumpkins can’t be grown.Although the Macy’s Parade has been a •Thanksgivingmorningfixturefor85years,itwasn’tthefirst.Gimbel’s,aPhiladelphiadepartment store, was ahead of them by fouryears,sponsoringthefirstparadein1920. Macy’s, however, became the one towatch,addingthefirstoftheirfamouscolossal helium balloons in 1927, a gi-ant Felix the Cat. Mickey Mouse made his debut in the 1934 parade. Other no-tablecharactersincludeCuriousGeorge,Scooby-Doo, Mr. Potato Head, and, of course, Snoopy, who has undergone several makeovers from aviator to skat-ing Snoopy to the addition of his friend, Woodstock.Look out below! On a rainy Thanksgiv-•ingin1957,asPopeyefloatedabovetheNewYorkCitycrowd,hiscapfilledupwithrain, dumping its contents on parade-go-ers below. In 1994, the purple Tyranno-saurus Rex Barney veered off course and ran into a lamp post, causing a large tear side in his side. Luckily, Barney was the only one injured. Not true three years lat-er, when the Cat in the Hat struck a lamp post,flingingfragmentstothestreetandstriking a spectator, resulting in a skull fracture and a month-long coma.

THANKSGIVING HOLIDAY (continued)

There are only three fruits that are entirely •native to North America – the blueberry, the Concord grape, and the cranberry. A 1680 letter from a colonist to his brother in England was one of the earliest mentions of cranberries. Early Native Americans, who called the fruit “sassamanesh” or “ibi-mi,” concocted “pemmican” by crushing cranberries and mixing them with dried deer meat. They also used the berries in poultices in order to draw poison from arrow wounds. The bright red juice lent itself nicely to use as a dye for blankets and clothing. European settlers called the berry a “crane berry” because the plant’s droopingflowerresembledtheheadandbill of a crane.Goodandgoodforyou!Thetinycranber-•ry is rich in antioxidants, and may provide important defense against Alzheimer’sDisease.When the •M a y f l o w e r sailed into what is now Provincetown Harbor on N o v e m b e r 11, 1620, it brought the ancestors of many notable Americans, including several presidents. BothGeorgeH.W.BushandhissoncantracetheirlineagebacktotheMayflower,as can the senior Bush’s Vice-President Dan Quayle and presidential wife and mother Barbara Bush. Film icons Orson Welles and Marilyn Monroe share the same ancestor, passenger John Alden, while notables Franklin Roosevelt, U.S. Grant, Sarah Palin, and actor RichardGerearemembersofthesamefamilytree.Clint Eastwood descends from Plymouth Colony governor William Bradford, as did Noah Webster of dictionary fame. It takes about 4,400 cranberries to make •a gallon of juice, and about 200 for ev-ery can of cranberry sauce. They are only grown in five American states, Wiscon-sin, Massachusetts, New Jersey, Oregon, and Washington. If you were to combine all the cranberry bogs in North America, the area would add up to only about 47 square miles.TheonlyofficialrecordofthefirstThanks-•giving menu comes from the writings of Colony governor William Bradford, who listed“fivedeer,alargenumberofturkeysand waterfowl, cod, and bass; plus the

harvest, which consisted of wheat, corn, barley, and perhaps a few peas.” We’ve added our assumptions of assorted nuts, squashes, and berries to the list.WhiletheofficialdateforThanksgivingin•the United States is the fourth Thursday of November, Canadians celebrate their holiday on the second Monday in Octo-ber. It began in 1872 as a day of gratitude for the Prince of Wales’ recovery from a life-threatening illness.The pumpkin was used by early settlers •as an antidote for snake bites. Others thought it could be used to remove freck-les.The colonists’ version of pumpkin pie left •out one essential – the crust! Their recipe called for slicing off the top, removing the seeds,andfillingupthecavitywithcream,spices, and honey. It was then baked in hot ashes, and because a pumpkin is 90 percent water, the result was a rich creamy custard.There was no lack of crust on the record-•holding world’s largest pumpkin pie, baked in2005.Weighinginat2,020pounds,thepastryrequired250poundsofcrust,900pounds of pumpkin, 62 gallons of evap-orated milk, 1,860 eggs, 300 pounds of sugar and seven pounds of cinnamon.

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On • Nov. 22, 1718, Edward Teach, also known as Blackbeard, is killed off North Carolina’s Outer Banks during a bloody battle with the British navy. Teach was the most infamous pirate of his day, winning the popular name of Blackbeard for his long, dark beard, which he was saidtolightonfireduringbattlestointimidate his enemies.On • Nov. 17, 1869,theSuezCanal,connecting the Mediterranean and the Red seas, is inaugurated. When itopened,theSuezCanalwasonly25 feetdeep.Major improvementsbegan in 1876, and today an average of 50 ships navigate thecanal daily, carrying more than 300 million tons of goods a year.On • Nov. 16, 1907, Indian Territory and Oklahoma Territory collectively enter the United States as Oklahoma, the 46th state. The name “Oklahoma” is derived from the Choctaw Indian words okla, meaning “people,” and humma, meaning “red.”On • Nov. 20, 1945, in Nuremberg, Germany, 24 high-ranking Nazisgo on trial for atrocities committed during World War II. The Nuremberg Trials were conducted by an international tribunal, and charges ranged from crimes against peace, to crimes of war, to crimes against humanity. On • Nov. 19, 1969,Braziliansoccergreat Pele scores his 1,000th professional goal in a game, againstVasco daGama inRio deJaneiro’s Maracana stadium. Born Edson Arantes do Nascimento in TresCoracos,Brazil,in1940,Pelescored 1,282 goals in 1,363 games during his career. On • Nov. 18, 1978, People’s Temple leader Jim Jones leads hundreds of his followers in a mass murder-suicide at their agricultural commune in remote northwestern Guyana.U.S. Congressman Leo Ryan, who had traveled to Jonestown to investigate, was murdered the day before as he attempted to leave.On • Nov. 21, 1980,more than350million people around the world tune in to television’s popular primetime drama“Dallas”tofindoutwhoshotJ.R. Ewing, the character fans loved tohate.TheepisodeidentifiedKristinShepard, J.R.’s wife’s sister and his former mistress, as the culprit.


1. LITERATURE: What is the literary device called alliteration?2. MATH: What is the Arabic equivalent of the Roman numerals MMDLVII?3. TELEVISION: What comic book superhero is either mentioned or represented in many episodes of the “Seinfeld” sitcom series?4. INVENTIONS: Who is credited withinventingtheelectricrazor?5. MOVIES: What was Forrest Gump’shomestate?6. MUSIC: What rock group performed the song “Pride (In the Name of Love)”?7. CHEMISTRY: What is the symbol for the element magnesium?8. GEOGRAPHY: What modern European country was called Lusitania in Roman times?9. LANGUAGE: In Latin names for the days of the week, what planet is represented by Wednesday?10. ANIMAL WORLD: Which insect can sting only once?

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How To Eat An Elephant – Part 4

Miriam Zoole continues her journal into better health, nutrition and fitness with the guidance of personal trainer, Kim Sopoci.

As we approach the holiday season our thoughts turn to family dinners, cookies, pies and many other oh-so-yummy-but-not-so-good-for-you foods. I will need lots of will power to get through “the” season. For those of you trying to get in shape and losing weight, put it in your mind right NOW that you will NOT gain weight over the next 2 months. Tell yourself, believe it, and you will come out the better for it in January.I’ve decided to share a little “weight loss” news with you… I have lost 16 pounds of FAT. Not just pounds, which usually means some muscle loss, but FAT. This was measured not just by a scale but by a tape measure and calipers. The inches are melting off, muscle is forming and overall toneisimproving.Pantsfitbetter,sleevelessshirts are no longer tucked in the back corner of my closet; my body is beginning to look more like I want it to. For those of you who are wondering how come I didn’t lose more weight during all this time, remember, I didn’t say “weight”, I said “fat”. I am not eating better and working my muscles to lose weight, I am building muscle, which weighs more than fat, in order to look and

feel better. One of the ways that I am making this happen is by eating “right”. Now many people will tell you what kind of “diet” you need to be on in order to lose weight, but remembaer, we want to lose FAT. In order to do that, you need to eat what is right for your body – not any one else’s. To properly explain the usefulness of metabolic typing, I must briefly discuss the crucial role ofblood pH. The ideal pH is 7.46. At this level, the body most efficiently absorbsandutilizesnutrients.AhigherorlowerpHmeans the blood is too alkaline or too acid for optimal functioning. Mal absorption and poor utilization of nutrients can lead to awide array of symptoms, such as fatigue , allergies, obesity, and high blood pressure. The further the blood deviates from its ideal pH level, the more severe the symptoms become. When the blood moves to its ideal pH level, the body comes into balance and these symptoms generally subside or disappear altogether. The key to managing the blood pH lies in knowing the individual’s metabolic type. There are different metabolic types (depending on who you ask that number is between 3 and 10) but let’s keep this simple and talk about the basic three types; fast, slow and moderate. So why not simply determine our blood pH and eat foods accordingly? Because even if we know, for example,

that the blood is too acid, we still don’t know which foods will make it more alkaline. The somewhat surprising reason for this is that any given food may be either alkalinizing oracidifying, depending on the metabolic type of the person ingesting it. Before we can be certain which foods (and supplements) we need, we must know our metabolic type.KimSopoci gavemea simple test to findout what metabolic type I am and gave me a lits of foods I should stay away from, and which are better for me. Of course many of my favorite foods are on the “do not eat” list! However, on the list of foods I am to indulge myself with, I have pleanty of yummy choices. Since each metabolic type will have its own list of foods to eat and foods to avoid, I do not want to list here what I amtoavoid,sinceYOUmayhavethatfoodon your “should eat” list. In order to findout what metabolic type you are, you can callKimat(303)690-3507andsetupyourintial consultation meeting. She will not only helpyoufindyourrightmetabolic typebutshe will pin point which muscles you need to strengthern in order to have your entire body in tune and working smoothly.

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Of particular interest in these troubled •economic times, it was British humor col-umnist Katharine Elizabeth Whitehornwho made the following sage observa-tion: “The easiest way for your children to learn about money is for you not to have any.”Thefishknownas theelectric raycan•produce a current strong enough to kill an adult human.If you are the parent of a young daugh-•ter, you are probably all too familiar with the Japanese export Hello Kitty. A new item has recently been added to the Hello Kitty line, but it is decidedly not for kids: The Super Hello Kitty Jewel doll is on themarket for $150,000.To cel-ebratethe35thanniversaryofthechar-acter, Sanrio (the maker of Hello Kitty), Swarovski (known for high-end crystals) and Japanese jewelry maker I.K. have created a 4-inch-tall Hello Kitty of plati-num, and studded the doll with 1,939 pieces of white topaz, 403 pink sap-phires, eyes of black spinel and a nose of citrine. The whole thing is topped off with a one-carat diamond on its hair rib-bon.The onion is actually a member of the •lily family.The next time you have a little bit of food •stuck in your teeth, consider this: More Americans choke on toothpicks than on any other object.InLaPaz,Bolivia,youcanfindoneof•the most unusual prisons in the world. At San Pedro Prison, inmates have to purchase their cells. Those who are wellofffinanciallycanbuyprivatecellswith bathrooms, television and kitchens. Those who are less lucky must share tiny rooms.

Thought for the Day: “We have in fact, two kinds of morality, side by side: one which we preach, but do not practice, and another which we practice, but seldom preach.” -- Bertrand RussellWEEKLY ANSWERS

Howard County Police officers still write their reports by hand, and the data is en-tered later by a computer tech into their da-tabase. One theft report stated that a farmer had lost2,025pigs.Thinkingthat tobeanerror, the tech called the farmer directly. “Is it trueMr.Smith thatyou lost2,025pigs?”sheasked.“Yeth.” lispedthefarmer.Beinga Howard County girl herself, the tech en-tered:“Subjectlost2sowsand25pigs.”Why isn’t phonetic spelled the way it sounds? Why are there interstate highways inHawaii?Whyare thereflotationdevicesunder plane seats instead of parachutes? Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there? Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing? If you can’t drink and drive, why do you need a driver’s license to buy liquor, and why do bars have parking lots? Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime? Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations? How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings? If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365daysayear,whyaretherelocksonthedoors? A man in a bar sees a friend at a table, drinking by himself. Approaching the friend he comments, “You look terrible. What’sthe problem?” “My mother died in August,” hesaid,“andleftme$25,000.”“Gee,that’stough,” he replied. “Then in September,” the friend continued, “My father died, leaving me $90,000.” “Wow. Two parents gone in two months. No wonder you’re depressed.” “And last month my aunt died, and left me $15,000.” “Three close family memberslost in three months? How sad.” “Then this month,” continued, the friend, “absolutely nothing!”A forester and a lawyer were in car acci-dent and showed up at the pearly gates to-gether. St. Peter greets them at the pearly gates and takes them to the homes where they will spend all of eternity. They get into St. Peter’s holy vehicle and head on down a gold road, which turns into a platinum road, which turns onto an even grander road

paved with diamonds, to a huge mansion where St. Peter turns to the lawyer and says, “Here is your home for the rest of eternity, en-joy! And if there is anything you need, just let me know.” Then St. Peter took the forester to his home, back down the diamond studded boulevard, down the platinum highway, down the street of gold, down an avenue of silver, along a stone alley and down an unpaved footpath to a shack. St Peter says “Here you go” and goes to leave when the forester says “Wait a minute!, how come the lawyer gets the big mansion and I get this shack?” St. Pe-tersays:“Well,forestersareadimeadozenhere, we have never had a lawyer before.” While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a touristcapsizedhisboat.Hecouldswim,but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting an old beach-comber standing on the shore, the tour-ist shouted, “Are there any gators around here?!” “Naw,” the man hollered back, “they ain’t been around for years!” “Feeling safe, the tourist started swimming leisurely toward the shore. About halfway there he asked the guy, “How’d you get rid of the gators?” “We didn’t do nothin’,” the beachcomber said. “The sharks got ‘em.” A Russian couple was walking down the street in Leningrad the other night, when the man felt a drop hit his nose. “I think it’s rain-ing,” he said to his wife. “No, that felt more like snow to me,” she replied. “No, I’m sure it was just rain, he said.” Well, as these things go, they were about to have a major argu-ment about whether it was raining or snow-ing. Just then they saw a minor communist partyofficialwalkingtowardthem.“Let’snotfightaboutit,”themansaid,“let’saskCom-rade Rudolph whether it’s officially rainingorsnowing.”Astheofficialapproached,theman said, “Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officiallyrainingorsnowing?”“It’sraining,ofcourse,” he answered and walked on. But the woman insisted: “I know that felt like snow!” To which the man quietly replied: “Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!” A man goes into a bar and seats himself on a stool. The bartender looks at him and says, “What’ll it be buddy?” The man says, “Set me up with seven whiskey shots and make them doubles.” The bartender does this and watch-es the man slug one down, then the next, then the next, and so on until all seven are gone almost as quickly as they were served. Staring in disbelief, the bartender asks why he’sdoingallthisdrinking.“You’ddrinkthemthis fast too if you had what I have.” The bar-tender hastily asks, “What do you have pal?” The man quickly replies, “I have a dollar.”

By Samantha Weaver


WEEKLY FUNNIES

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Tidbits® - Denver Metro Area November 16, 2009

EventsCabinet of Curiosities: October 9,2009-March5,2010;IndoorGalleryattheMuseumofOutdoorArt, 1000 Englewood Pkwy, Ste 2-230, Englewood. Mon - Thu 9:00 am-5:00pmFri9:00am-4:00pm.Awhimsical exhibition showcasing the talents of 12 artists working in a new vintage style to create artistic worlds in furniture, cabinets, rooms, antique luggage, hand blown glass and fashion armoires. The juxtapositions of disparate objects is sure to delight the historian, tinkerer and armchair scientiest. Among the many oddities, you will see Lewis Carroll’s “Imaginary Cabinet Room” byLonnieHanzon,NickBantock’s“PortraitofanArtistasaYoungMan”and Elaine Pellham’s “Fisher King’s Tackle Box”.ADMISSION IS FREE! www.moaonline.orgWorld Kitchen: Chef Cookings Demos: November 14, 2009 - December 12, 2009. Saturdays 10:30 am - 12:00 pm - FREE ADMISSION. Denver Public Library, Central Branch, Denver. This cookie party, hostedbyJessicaGaydos,featuresa selection of cookies from around the world. There’s no better time than fall and winter for a batch of warm cookies,andChefGaydoswillprovidesamples and recipes that will gain you entree to any Untied Nation Potluck. www.DenverLiberary.orgTodd Powell Photography Exhibition: December 1 - December 18, 2009, with an artist reception Thursday, December 105:00pm-7:00pm.CityofGreenwoodVillage Curtis Arts & Humanities Center; 2349 E. Orchard Road, Littleton, CO. It’s hard to believe something like a calendar could challenge a commercial photographer’sfineartside.Butthat’sexactly what happened to professional photographer Todd Powell. Powell’s vividimagesarefeaturedinGreenwoodVillage’s 2010 calendar. Powell’s gallery exhibit revolves around the theme of water,anelementGreenwoodVillagewanted to feature as part of its mission of environmental education. K’s Gifts 2 Go: HolidayBazaarEvent,December12,2009,GreenValleyRanchGolfClub,4900HimalayaSt,Denver. FREE ADMISSION!!! 11:00 am-5:00pm.AvarietyofvendorsforyoutoSHOP‘TILYOUDROP!!IntimateApparel,GanoCoffee,LeatherPurses,Quilts and Blankets, Bath Products. Look good for the holidays. Shapewear, etc.Don’tYouDareMissIt!ContactK-(303) 200-7004.

To Place Your Event in this calendar please e-mail [email protected]

Free EventsBus Tour of the Golden Triangle Art/Museum District: First Friday of every month5-9pm.BalletArtsTheatre,816AcomaSt,Denver303-825-7570www.pnfproductions.comChildren’s Museum: First Tuesday evening of the month, 4 - 8pm. 2121 Children’s Museum Drive www.cmdenver.orgCU In Broomfield World Music Series: Free concerts 2nd Wed of every month,7pmBroomfieldAuditorium,3Community Park Rd, 303-469-3301 x7999 www.broomfield.orgDenver Art Museum: First Sat of every month free to CO residents, 10am-5pm100West14thAvenueParkwaywww.denverartmuseum.orgDenver Botanic Gardens: Free days Check web site for 2010 schedule of freedays.1005YorkSt,720-865-3500www.botanicgardens.orgDenver Museum of Nature & Science: 2009 Free days: Sun Nov 22. 2001 Colorado Boulevard, 303-322-7009 www.dmns.orgFirehouse Tales For Tots: Denver FirefightersMuseum1356TremontPl,(303) 892-1436. First Wednesday of each month 10:00 am - 10:30 am. Ages 2-6Museum of Contemporary Art: First Saturday of every month admission = 1 penny.127519thStinDenver.303-298-7554www.mcartdenver.orgU.S. Mint: Mon - Fri; 8am - 3pm; reservations encouraged 320 West Colfax Ave.303-405-4761www.usmint.gov

SportsColorado Avalanche - NHL

Flames host: Tue Nov 17, 7:30 pm•Oilers host: Wed Nov 18, 7:00 pm•Canucks host: Fri Nov 20, 8:00 pm•Flyers: Mon Nov 23, 7:00 pm•Predators:WedNov25,7:00pm•Wild hosts: Fri Nov 27, 12:00 pm•Wild: Sat Nov 28, 7:00 pm•

Denver Broncos - NFLSanDiego:SunNov22,2:15pm•NewYork:ThuNov26,6:20pm•

Denver Nuggets - NBAToronto: Tue Nov 17, 7:00 pm•At LA Clippers: Fri Nov 20, 8:30 pm•Chicago: Sat Nov 21, 7:00 pm•New Jersey: Tue Nov 24, 7:00 pm•AtMinnesota:WedNov25,6:00pm•NewYork:FriNov27,7:00pm•Minnesota: Sun Nov 29, 6:00 pm•

Colorado Mammoth - NLLPRESEASON

Minnesota: Fri Dec 18, 7:00pm• REGULAR SEASON begins January!

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Tidbits - Denver Metro

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Now Hiring for the following positions:SALES• - Earn $50k, $75k, $100k or more - you set the limit!DISTRIBUTION• - Earn $10 - $18/hr. Must have own car and

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“Why am I no longer in the picture? Don’t they love me any more?”

A child should never need to ask these questions.You can help! Foster a child and give them the love, patience, structure and

attention they need. Denver Area Youth Services (303) 698-2300

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Top 9 Signs Your Cat Has Learned Your Internet Password...9.E-mailflamesfromsomeguynamed

“Fluffy.” 8. Traces of kitty litter in your keyboard. 7.Youfindyou’vebeensubscribedto

strange newsgroups like alt.recreational.catnip.

6.Yourmousehasteethmarksinit...andastrange aroma of tuna.

5.Hate-mailmessagestoAppleComputers, Inc. about their release of “CyberDog.”

4.Yournewergonomickeyboardhasastrange territorial scent to it.

3.Youkeepfindingnewsoftwarearoundyour house like CatinTax and WarCat II.

2. On IRC you’re known as the IronMouser. andthe#1SignYourCatHasLearnedYourInternetPassword...1. Little kitty carpal-tunnel braces near the

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Nine Things Dogs Don’t Understand...

1. It’s not a laugh to practice barking at 3a.m.

2.It’swrongtobackGrandmaintoacornerand guard her.

3. He shouldn’t jump on your bed when he’s sopping wet.

4. The cats have every right to be in the living room.

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5.Barkingatguests10minutesaftertheyarrive is stupid

6.GettingupdoesNOTmeanwearegoingfor a walk

7. Just because I’m eating, doesn’t mean you can.

8. If you look at me with those big soppy eyes, I’m not going to give in and feed you. NOT NOT NOT. Oh, ok, just this once.

9. No, it’s my food....Oh alright then, just a small piece.

tidbits - denver metro area - issue #1113

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