Writing Workshop 6

Focus: The purpose of an expository essay is for the writer to communicate ideas and information about a topic to specific audiences for specific purposes. Expository essays are sometimes written to define or describe a subject in great detail.

Goal:Write a multi-paragraph expository essay that: • Presents effective introductions and concluding paragraphs. • Contains a clearly stated purpose or controlling idea. • Is logically organized with appropriate facts and details. • Includes no extraneous information or inconsistencies. • Accurately synthesizes ideas from several sources. • Uses a variety of rhetorical devices. • Uses a variety of sentence structures. • Uses a variety of transitions to link paragraphs.

To achieve this goal, you will practice writing in the expository mode of definition. You will engage in a series of activities in which you work with your teacher and with your classmates to construct two model definition essays. You will use these models to write your own definition essay.

Activity 1: Discovering Elements of a Multi-Paragraph Definition Essay 1. Quickwrite: What do you know about expository writing? How would a definition

essay fit in the expository writing genre?

Expository WritingDefinition EssaySUGGESTED LEARNING STRATEGIES: Quickwrite, Marking the Text, Graphic Organizer, Think-Pair-Share, Brainstorming, Webbing, Outlining, Think Aloud, Drafting, Sharing and Responding

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Sample TextRead the following essay, and determine the stated purpose or controlling idea. Mark the text to locate supporting information (facts and details).

A hero: A man noted for feats of courage or nobility of purpose, one who has risked or sacri!ced his life. "is is what comes to mind when one hears the word hero, but a true hero is much more. A hero is not a man in cape and tights. A hero is made by what he does, the example he sets for society, and even what he is not.

A hero puts others’ needs before his own. For example, Ana, a woman !ghting cancer, makes “everyone feel that things are going to be okay.” When Ana is diagnosed with cancer for the second time, she feels as though she could never win and like nothing is going to help her this time. But instead of whining about it and giving up, she comforts the people around her, making sure that they are positive, even if she is not. Ana doesn’t care if she is feeling bad, or if she wants to surrender. She puts her feelings aside and keeps moving forward because she knows that the people around her love her and need to know that she is going to survive. Marlin, from Finding Nemo, is another example of a sel#ess hero. He was terri!ed of the ocean, but when his son, Nemo, got taken, he let go of that fear in order to save Nemo. He put aside his feelings for his overpowering love for Nemo. "is shows Marlin is heroic because instead of staying at home and waiting for someone else to !x his mess, he goes on an adventure despite his fear and anxiety. To be a hero, one must put the needs of others before their own, especially when faced with challenges.

Another example of a hero is the character Mulan, from the movie Mulan, who is a hero because she is strong enough to face her many challenges and strong enough to overcome her imperfection. One substantial challenge that Mulan deals with, is having to save China in the war against the Huns. Not only does she do that, but she has to do it as a woman, which goes against her culture’s expectations of a woman’s duty. Against all the odds and despite people’s rejection, Mulan manages to save China and bring honor to her family. By doing this, Mulan proves herself to be a hero because she stands up for what she believes in and puts the safety of the people of China before her own. When Mulan faces the challenges put in her path, she sometimes triumphs, but sometimes she does not. Mulan is a hero, not only because of her conquests, but also because of how she faces her inadequacies. Mulan pretends to be a man, which brings dishonor to her family. However, by surmounting that challenge, and turning it around to save China as a woman, she renews her family’s honor and proves herself. Mulan’s determination to save her people and persevere through di$culties makes her a hero.

Heroes are not followers. Heroes are leaders. For example, in the story of Harrison Bergeron, from the story “Harrison Bergeron,” Harrison does not let the government limit his potential, and he doesn’t want others to be limited either. By !ghting against the unfair equality laws that were set in place by the government, Harrison is a hero. He stands up for what is right even though people are telling him it is wrong, and he leads people in a !ght against the laws that put masks on the beautiful and weights on the strong.

The Everyday

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Harrison is a hero because he doesn’t follow others down the wrong path, just because it was expected. Another hero who did not follow along with what was expected was Mercy Carter, from the book !e Ransom of Mercy Carter. Mercy was kidnapped along with her entire village by a group of French-Indians. Instead of dwelling on the past a%er her kidnapping, like many of her friends and elders, Mercy decided that she needed to accept what had been thrown her way and move on with her life. By refusing to follow along with all of the grief and despair expected of her by her people, Mercy got a chance to start over and a chance to lead people in a new life of acceptance and understanding with the natives who kidnapped them. Without her leadership, the people of her village would have never been able to forgive so they could move on. "ey would be stuck, but Mercy pulled them out of that so that they could be happy. Heroes have to step back from the expectations of their culture and decide what is truly right, so that they can lead people away from following the wrong path.

To !nd what heroes truly are, one has to stretch beyond the stereotype to look at the everyday hero. Anyone can be a hero. Heroes will put others before themselves and set examples for the rest of us to follow. "ey are leaders.

2. Number each paragraph of the sample text above to help you analyze the organizational structure of the essay. Work with a partner to discuss the purpose of each paragraph, and note your thoughts in the margin.

3. Create a graphic organizer of the components and characteristics of a multi-paragraph definition essay. This organizer will serve as a model for you during the writing process as you generate and refine your own essay.

Activity 2: Writing a Class EssayPrompt: Think about a time when you played a game and lost. How did you react to the other player(s)? What about a time when you won? How did you react when you were victorious? Think about the emotions you have when competing. Write a multi-paragraph essay that defines the concept of good sportsmanship. Be sure the essay meets the requirements listed in the goal statement for writing an effective multi-paragraph expository essay.

1. Mark the writing prompt above to clarify the task. 2. With your class, choose a topic for the essay, and write it here.

Prewriting 3. Write notes here about ideas for the essay.

Expository WritingDefinition Essay

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4. In addition to your initial prewriting brainstorming, look at the resources your teacher has provided about the topic. What examples and definitions can you gather from these resources that will be helpful in writing a definition essay? Are there experts you could consult?

5. To create an effective draft of your definition essay, you will need a thesis to provide focus for the essay. A thesis is not the title of the essay (e.g., Computers) or an announcement of the subject to the reader (e.g., In this essay, I will tell you about computers…). A thesis consists of a subject and the writer’s opinion about that subject. Generate a one-sentence working thesis statement that expresses the point you will make about the subject of your essay.

Successful definition essays go beyond dictionary definitions to show the writer’s personal opinion. To extend your definition of a concept or term, write using definition strategies, such as the strategy of example and the strategy of negation. • The function strategy is used to define what something does or how it works. • The example strategy is used to show specific, relevant examples that fit the

writer’s definition. Examples often come from texts, history, or everyday life. • The negation strategy is used to explain what something is by showing what it is

not. Using negation helps to contrast your definition with others’ definitions.

Drafting the EssayA body paragraph consists of these elements: • Topic sentence: A sentence which consists of a subject and opinion that works

directly to support the thesis. • Transitions: Words used to connect ideas (e.g., for example, for instance). • Supporting information: Specific facts and details that are appropriate for the

topic, are relevant, and come from a variety of sources. Extraneous details should not be included, and the supporting information should not have inconsistencies.

• Reflective commentary: Sentences that explain how the information is relevant to the thesis/topic sentence and bring a sense of closure to the paragraph.

6. With your class, generate an outline for the body paragraphs. Then draft the body paragraphs on separate paper.

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7. Now that you have co-constructed a thesis statement and body paragraphs, you are ready to create the introduction and conclusion of the essay.

Introduction paragraphs include the following: • A hook or lead: Consider using a quote, question, anecdote, or statement of

intrigue to create your hook or lead. • A connection between the hook/lead and the thesis. • Thesis statement describing the subject and opinion.

The conclusion brings a sense of closure to the essay. Use the following levels of questions to guide your thinking in crafting a conclusion: • What did you say? (literal) • What does it mean? (interpretive) • Why does it matter? (universal)

Revising 8. Now that the class essay has been drafted, consider the language you used

to convey your ideas. A writer makes stylistic choices in language for effect, variety, and coherence. Evaluate your draft, and revise your essay to address the following rhetorical devices and stylistic elements.

Rhetorical devices show ideas in interesting ways and help your ideas have a lasting effect on your reader. Examples of rhetorical devices are parallelism, analogy, and rhetorical questions. Incorporate rhetorical devices into the class essay. • Parallelism is using the same structure for similar parts of a sentence. Use

parallelism to add balance, rhythm, and clarity to a sentence. Examples: He often listened to music and danced in his seat while riding in the car. (parallel verbs) The backpack held three books, two folders, and one snack. (parallel objects)

• An analogy compares two things and expresses the relationship between them. Use an analogy to explain or clarify an idea or object. Example: My need to use a computer is like my need for food and water.

• A rhetorical question is one for which the writer expects no reply, or the writer clearly directs the reader to one desired reply. Use rhetorical questions to emphasize an idea or to draw a conclusion to the facts. A rhetorical question may help remind your reader of a main point. Example: Is that truly what we want for the environment? How can these facts lie?

Another stylistic choice is the use of sentence variety. Inserting word groups, such as appositives or appositive phrases, into sentences adds variety to your sentence structure. An appositive is a noun or noun phrase that renames another noun in a sentence. Notice that appositives and appositive phrases are set off by commas.Our teacher, Ms. Greig, is out sick today.Heroes, ones who act selflessly, are found all around us.Mika studies biology, the science of life or living matter.

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Coherence refers to the logical organization of the essay and how the ideas are tied together to flow smoothly, making the essay easy to follow for the reader. Two ways to revise for coherence are to use transitional words within and between paragraphs and to use varied sentence structures.

Transitional words help you move from one sentence or thought to another. • Transitions that add information: again, also, additionally, in addition, for

example, for instance, likewise, finally, equally important • Transitions that clarify: in other words, for instance, that is, put another way

• Transitions that conclude: as a result, therefore, finally, last, in conclusion, in summary

9. Reflection: What additional support do you need in writing a definition essay?

Activity 3: Writing an Essay with Peers Prompt: Think about your favorite meals, perhaps meals that are traditional to your family or to a particular holiday. Do certain foods make you feel good? Write a multi-paragraph essay that defines the concept of comfort food. Be sure the essay meets the requirements listed in the goal statement for writing an effective expository essay.

Generating Content 1. In your writing group, review and mark the prompt to highlight major elements of

the task you’re being asked to do. Use a prewriting strategy to explore ideas that may address the prompt.

2. Select the best ideas from your prewriting to construct a working thesis for your essay.

Drafting 3. Review and organize the ideas from your prewriting as you draft at least two

body paragraphs. Use an outline to organize the ideas in your body paragraphs. Be sure to brainstorm topic sentences that support the thesis and specific details and facts to develop and support the topic sentences. Synthesize ideas from several sources. Avoid extraneous information and inconsistencies. Draft your body paragraphs, and include commentary.

4. Read your body paragraphs, and discuss an effective way to introduce and conclude your key ideas. Use a prewriting strategy to generate a draft that demonstrates the parts of effective introductions (e.g., hook/lead, connection, and thesis) and conclusions (response to the levels of questions).

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Expository WritingDefinition Essay

Revising 5. Reread the goal statement at the beginning of this workshop. Use the bullet

points as a writer’s checklist. Read aloud your draft in your writing group, and gather feedback based on the criteria of an effective expository definition essay.

6. Review your draft for language use. • Select ideas to emphasize by incorporating appropriate rhetorical devices,

such as parallelism, analogy, and rhetorical questions.• If your draft contains too many simple sentences, revise sentences that could

be expanded for clarity or description. Include a variety of sentence structures to add interest.

• Revise at least two sentences to include an appositive or appositive phrase.

7. Review your draft for coherence: • Discuss which transitions can be used to link ideas effectively within and

between your body paragraphs. Incorporate at least two into your draft.

Editing for Publication 8. Read your draft and peer edit to correct errors in grammar, punctuation, and

spelling.

9. Discuss the key ideas present in your essay, and generate a list of potentially creative titles for your essay. Rank them and select one. Place a title at the top of your essay.

Activity 4: Independent WritingPrompt: Think about the people you consider as your friends. What makes someone a friend? How do you demonstrate being a friend? Write a multi-paragraph essay that defines the concept of friendship. Be sure the essay meets the requirements listed in the goal statement for writing an effective multi-paragraph expository essay.

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Writing Workshop 6 Expository Writing SCORING GUIDE

Scoring Criteria Exemplary Proficient Emerging

Development of Ideas

The essay• presents a topic with a

clearly stated and insightful controlling idea

• uses strategies of definition (e.g., function, example, negation) to effectively develop ideas throughout the essay

• supports topic with specific and relevant facts, evidence, details, and examples to guide understanding of main ideas

• synthesizes ideas accurately from several sources to strengthen support.

The essay• presents a topic with a

controlling idea• uses strategies of definition

(e.g., function, example, negation) to develop ideas throughout the essay

• supports topic with facts, evidence, details, and examples that guide the reader’s understanding of the main ideas

• combines ideas accurately from several sources.

The essay• presents a topic with an

unfocused controlling idea • uses few strategies of

definition (e.g., function, example, negation) to develop ideas

• contains insufficient or vague facts, evidence, details, and examples in an underdeveloped topic that confuses the reader’s understanding of the main ideas

• synthesizes ideas inaccurately and/or from limited sources.

OrganizationalStructure

The essay• leads with an effective,

engaging introduction • effectively sequences

ideas and uses meaningful transitions to create cohesion and clarify the relationship among ideas

• provides an insightful conclusion that follows from and supports the explanation presented.

The essay• presents a clear and focused

introduction • sequences ideas and

uses transitions to create coherence

• provides a conclusion that connects the larger ideas presented in the essay.

The essay• contains an underdeveloped

and/or unfocused introduction

• presents disconnected ideas and limited use of transitions

• contains an underdeveloped or unfocused conclusion.

Use of Language

The essay• uses precise diction

deliberately chosen to inform or explain the topic

• uses a variety of sentence structures to enhance the explanation (e.g., using appositives)

• utilizes a variety of rhetorical devices to enhance explanation

• demonstrates technical command of conventions of standard English.

The essay• uses appropriate diction

for the information or explanation

• uses a variety of sentence structures (e.g., using appositives)

• uses rhetorical devices • demonstrates general

command of conventions; minor errors in punctuation, grammar, capitalization, or spelling do not interfere with meaning.

The essay• uses diction that is

inappropriate at times for the information or explanation

• shows little or no variety in sentence structure (e.g., using appositives)

• uses few or no rhetorical devices

• demonstrates limited command of conventions; errors in grammar, punctuation, capitalization, or spelling interfere with meaning.

Writing Process The essay reflects thoughtful planning, significant revision, and editing to produce a draft ready for publication.

The essay reflects evidence of planning, revision, and editing to produce a draft ready for publication.

The essay demonstrates minimal evidence of planning, revision, and editing and is not ready for publication.

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Writing Workshop 6 • Expository Writing 50a