zombie apocalypse preparation guide

7/30/2019 Zombie Apocalypse Preparation Guide

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Preparation GuideDr Aislenot B Eton


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Zombie Apocalypse Preperation Guide . Copyright Nishikata Press 2012.

All rights reserved. No part of this work may be reproduced or transmitted

in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including

photocopying, recording, or by any information storage or retrieval system,

without the prior written permission of the copyright owner and the

publisher.

Cover and other illustrations by Jack Knight


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Get the FULL report at http://www.zombietruth.net/zombie-suvival-guide/

Disclaimer

The contents of this book are entirely fictional. To the best of the authors knowledge , there are no such

things as zombies. None of the information or advice herein is intended to be taken seriously or acted

upon. Any person who is sincerely concerned about zombies or who intends to make decisions based on

belief in zombies should seek assistance. Just not from me.

Please note; a page has been left blank before each new section and chapter to improve layout in printed

copies.


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CONTENTS

ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE ........................................................................

Contents ..................................................................................................... 3

Preparation ................................................................................................. 4

Psychological Preparation ....................................................................... 9

Positive Thinking .................................................................................. 9

Visualization ...................................................................................... 12

Physical & simulation Training ............................................................... 14

Combat Training ................................................................................ 17

Boredom ............................................................................................... 18

What to wear to the apocalypse ............................................................ 23

Other Considerations ......................................................................... 29

Footwear ............................................................................................... 30


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Gathering Intelligence ........................................................................... 33

Food and Water .................................................................................... 35

INDEX ................................................................................................... 37

PREPARATION

Appropriate preparation is an absolutely essential component of a

successful survival plan. But many people are confused about what is

important and what is just a waste of precious time and recourses .

ake no mistake, you must be fully prepared if you hope to be able

to survive the munching. But what does appropriate, effective

preparation consist of? Many people have been lead to believe thateffective Zombie preparation involves stockpiling a huge amount of

weaponry, ammunition, food and water.

M


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This approach is WRONG and following it will likely get you zombified.

Now I know that is a big claim, but I am more than confident that you will

soon agree with me.

Lets consider this logically. A large stockpile of weapons and food

requires a place of storage. That might be your house for example. But

imagine how annoying it would be if you had stockpiled your weapons, set

up the perfect Zombie-proof fort at home and then the apocalypse goes

and starts when yo u are at the beach! All those guns and ammo arent

much good to you now are they? No. You were counting on having at your

disposal an arsenal larger than that of some European countries, but

instead you find yourself semi-naked and desperately flicking your towel at

the Zombies as they close in for the kill.

But lets assume that you are at home when the apocalypse starts.

Okay, so you have a lot of food and ammunition and you figure you can

hold out for a good long time. But wait! Can you stay awake shooting

twenty-four hours a day seven days a week? Because those Zombies are

not going to be stopping for a coffee break you know.


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Is your place of refuge really strong enough to stop the Zombies from

getting in? Keep in mind that even a fully functional nuclear war rated bomb

shelter wont keep you alive for long. The air -filtering and air-conditioning

systems are designed keep our nuclear, biological and chemical

contaminants, but not to withstand zombies ripping it to pieces. And when

you come up for air, its chow time for the undead .


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Dr Eton Says

Zombies do not work and play well

with others.

Dont rely on them to cooperate with

your plans


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The next approach you might consider is to have a mobile stockpile instead

of, or as a back-up to, a stationary stockpile. This does increase the odds

of the stockpile being available to you when you need it, but it is not a

guarantee. Furthermore, a mobile stockpile will be subject to all the

problems related to use of an automobile.

Finally, you might consider using a distributed stockpiling method.

With distributed stockpiling you do not place all of your weaponry and other

supplies in a single location, but rather you have multiple mini-stockpiles of

weaponry and food in various widely separated locations. This has the

advantage of giving you the best possible chance of being able to access

your provisions regardless of where you happen to be when the

apocalypse starts. At least in theory; in practice, however, your stockpiles

will be found and looted repeatedly. So you will need to continually

replenish them and find new hiding spots.

So, if stockpiling weapons and food is not the right way to go about

preparing for the Zombie apocalypse, then what should you be doing?

Im glad you asked! The answer awaits you on the next page.


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PSYCHOLOGICAL PREPARATION

The very best form of preparation is psychological . You must get your head

together BEFORE the Zombies get your head, together. There are a

number of psychological preparation techniques that are very simple to put

into practise, but that are also extremely powerful survival aids in the event

of a Zombie apocalypse.

The ability to keep a positive mindset in times of crisis is an incredibly

important but often overlooked and underrated survival skill. One of the

biggest killers during a Zombie attack (apart from Zombies obviously) is

depression, despair and the loss of hope that results in fatal inaction.

Negative thoughts such as Oh my God were all gonna die! can lead the


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way to this despair and are of no help whatsoever. Always remember that

others have survived Zombie apocalypses in the past. Where they all

smarter than you, all better than you? NO (I guess) and if they did it, then

so can you (probably).

A great way to keep yourself in a positive mental state is to use

affirmations. An affirmation is a positive thought that you repeat to yourself

regularly until it has become ingrained in your unconscious mind and

accepted as fact. Unlike your conscious mind, the unconscious mind does

not evaluate statements in a logical and critical way. Rather, your

unconscious mind is like an innocent child that simply accepts what you tell

it. You should therefore be sure to tell it things that will leave you

psychologically stronger, more confident and better able to cope with

adversity.

When writing affirmations it is important to write them in the present

tense so that you are telling your unconscious that the state you desire is in

fact already in place. Remember that your unconscious mind simply

accepts what you tell it. Your unconscious will then act powerfully and


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continuously to ensure that your desire is met. Some example affirmations

are given below.

I am coping fearlessly with the Zombie attack

I know just what to do with this horde of

Zombies

I am enjoying the challenge of surviving this

apocalypse

You say Zombie , I say Shmombie

I am running like the wind, leaving the Zombies

for undead


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I am loving being in mortal danger every waking

and sleeping moment for the foreseeable future

Try repeating these affirmations to yourself aloud in a confident voice every

hour or so during the day and last thing at night for the next few weeks.

You will soon notice a huge change not only in yourself, but also in the way

others treat you.

Visualization is an amazingly powerful psychological technique that will

really power charge your mental apocalypse preparation. In some ways

visualization can be even more powerful than affirmations because the

unconscious mind responds more strongly to visual imagery than to words.

Visualization has been used for decades by elite athletes to improve their


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performance when it really counts and it can improve your Zombie

apocalypse survival chances as well.

The key to successful visualization is to picture yourself surviving the

Zombie apocalypse in as much detail as you can. Really exercise every

aspect of your imagination to vividly see and feel yourself in the desired

situation. Try the following exercise.

Find a quiet, relaxing place where you can sit or lie comfortably

without being disturbed for a half hour or so (especially not by Zombies).

Do some deep breathing exercises to get yourself into a state of deep

physical relaxation and then concentrate on picturing yourself having

survived the apocalypse.

See yourself standing surrounded by the stinking corpses of those

who didnt make it. See the chaos and destruction of the aftermath. Really

see the smoking ruins, see the scattered detritus of a ruined civilization.

Dont forget to include your other senses as well. Although the

process is called visualization it can be strengthened one hundred fold by

incorporating your senses of smell, hearing, touch and humor. Do you


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smell the rotting corpses and smoke of burning debris? Do you feel the

hardened gore caked on your face? Can you hear the distant rumble of

approaching helicopters? Make the scene as real as possible, then fully

inhabit and experience it and revel in the fact that you have survived.

Doing the above exercise regularly will instruct your unconscious

mind to be focussed 100% of the time on the problem of surviving the

coming apocalypse. So even when your conscious mind is shopping,

laughing, pi cking its nose or just chilling out, your unconscious mind will be

eternally vigilant and ready to drag you into action in two shakes of a

protruding appendix.

PHYSICAL & SIMULATION TRAINING

As with any type of disaster situation, your odds of survival will be

greatly improved of you are physically fit and healthy. It is vitally importantto be in good shape so dont neglect your physical training. Personal

hygiene is another important factor in planning for survival. Not only does


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this help to keep you healthy, but limiting the amount of scent you give off

will also make it more difficult for zombies to detect you.

Marksmanship and fighting skills have their place, but the most

important skill is the ability to run very fast . Be sure to spend time

improving your speed and endurance. Also practice to perfect your ability to

escape over obstacles like walls and fences and to climb trees and

buildings that might provide shelter or a hiding place. You want your body

to consider such feats as second nature so that you can perform them

instantly and unhesitatingly when the need arises.

Is there a sporting team nearby with a supporter base that has a well-

deserved reputation for mindless violence? If so you are in luck! If you can

anger a crowd of these supporters with insults directed at them and their

team then you will be able to practice fleeing for your life from a bloodthirsty

pack of deranged killers. This is the closest you can get to the real thing

and is far more realistic than paintballing or any other leisure activity that

purports to simulate combat or similar high intensity situations.

Furthermore, this exercise is free and you can repeat it as often as you like;

unless they catch you of course.


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Computer simulation is another technique that can sharpen up your

survival skills in preparation for the apocalypse. Computer games that allow

the player to simulate scenarios that occur in a Zombie apocalypse can be

an excellent way of polishing up your preparation.

But one problem with these games is that they tend to put way too

much emphasis on fighting the Zombies and not nearly enough on running

away and hiding. Try to concentrate on the latter skills. No game can ever

come close to recreating the sheer terror of a Zombie-fight and you need to

feel the weapons in your hands before you can learn to handle them with

any skill.

One very important skill to practice is piloting an aircraft. This may be

vital to your survival so do not neglect it. There is no need to go to the

expense of paying for real life flying lessons since everything you need to

know can be learned from MS Flight simulator or similar software.

This is one skill where simulation is as good as the real thing. Did you

know that professional pilots do most of their training in a simulator?

Furthermore, flying is actually much easier than most people imagine it to


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be so do not be put off by big-talking pilots who love to make their job

sound hard and complicated. After just a few hours of practice I have

learned to take-off, fly and land a large jetliner and I hardly ever crash.

And just think, if I can do that with bug ridden software, imagine how well I

could do with a real plane. Im not telling you this to blow my own horn; I

am just letting you know what is possible with a little practise.

I once met a pilot and when I explained my views to him he laughed

at me hysterically. This defensive reaction clearly shows that I had hit very

close to a raw nerve.

Ok, so if you do things right you might not ever have to do any fighting, but

just in case you should do a decent amount of weapons practice. But you

dont want to let this get out of hand and detract from your psychological

and physical preparation so it is really important to focus on a minimum of


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weapons and techniques that you can master or at least attain some

competence in.

I strongly recommend you become very familiar with shot guns and

samurai swords (katana). Detailed advice on the use of these and other

weapons is given in the section on combat. Do not waste time practicing

distance shooting with your shotgun. When fighting you will only use it at

close range so concentrate on being able to fire quickly and accurately at

close range and, very importantly, being able to reload quickly.

With your katana, you will concentrate on slicing movements

designed to cut the enemy in half or at least to remove limbs. Again, the

combat section includes a detailed discussion of the rationale and methods.

Forget about extensive practice with rifles, pistols and the like. As we

will see, these are all but useless against Zombies. A general familiarity

with them will suffice.

BOREDOM


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You might think that your apocalypse experience will consist solely of fear,

adrenaline and terror. But, strange as it may seem, boredom is something

that you may have to face during the course of the apocalypse and if not

properly managed it can be fatal.

If you are unable to get clear away at the start of the apocalypse then

chances are that you will have to spend quite a lot of time in hiding from the

Zombies. During such times you will need to be absolutely quiet and still for

perhaps hours on end. This might seem easy enough to you now as you sit

perusing this magnificent book in the comfort of your reading chair with a

pipe of good tobacco and a gin and tonic close to hand, but in reality few

people can cope with it for long before they start going stark raving mad.


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Dr Eton Says

What doesnt kill you can

still make you undead.

Dont get cocky.


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Keep in mind that it will not be possible to surf through Youtube, fire

up the PS2 or switch on the television. These will generate noise that could

attract Zombies. Earphones are no solution because, while they will

prevent you from being heard, they will also prevent you from hearing what

is going on around you. Watching that cute Japanese cat that likes to jump

in and out of cardboard boxes is normally a good way to while away the

hours, but you dont want to run the risk of being rudely interrupted by the

undead.

What you really need to do to cope with boredom is to practise

dealing with it in your everyday life (reading this book is an excellent start!).

You will have to come to accept boredom rather than trying to fight or

to resist it. Realize that being bored is in really a great blessing in disguise.

Boredom brings with it the opportunity to enter a Zen-like state in which

time becomes irrelevant. In this highly evolved mental state hours may

pass like seconds. You will become one with the universe and will simply

be. When the time for action comes you will instinctively return to your


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normal state of mental and physical readiness and respond automatically

and totally appropriately to whatever challenge presents itself. Neat huh?

The one potential problem is that it might take decades of practice

before you are able to achieve this Zen-like state. And you might not have

decades available before the Zombie Apocalypse begins.

A good compromise is to keep some colouring and puzzle books with

you. These allow you to pass the time but do not take long to master.

Furthermore, they will not prevent you from be alerted by the sounds of an

impending danger.

Join the dots; it could save your life.


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WHAT TO WEAR TO THE APOCALYPSE

You might think that fashion and appearance are of little or no importance

when it comes to selecting clothes for the Zombie apocalypse. But you

would be wrong; possibly even dead wrong. We all know that how we dress

can affect our moods, our thoughts and even our efficiency. You should be

aiming to strike a balance between clothes that make you feel good and

that meet the exacting practical demands of a Zombie apocalypse situation.

Furthermore, since you cannot rely on getting much advance warning

of the start of the apocalypse, you will need to be in your Zombie fighting

gear 24 hours a day, 7 days a week (or 24/7 as I say it. Feel free to use

that if you like). So while that full battledress, helmet, Kevlar armour and

ammunition bandoliers might be ideal in some respects, since you cant


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wear it all the time you might be caught with your pants down at the

moment of truth. It is much better to have a pretty good Zombie survival

outfit that you are actually wearing rather than the ultimate Zombie

survival outfit that you arent wearing.


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Dr Eton Says

As you develop and improve your

Zombie survival skills you may findthat your friends and others become

jealous of you.

This jealousy might be expressed by

laughing, hitting, or ostracising you.

Dont let this get you down.

After all, if you cant cope with your

friends laughing at you, what will

you do when they are trying to eat

you?


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When it comes to choosing clothes that make you feel good, I will

leave that entirely up to your own fashion sense and conscience. But be

sure to choose options that meet the practical considerations listed below

and avoid corduroy and other materials that make load and embarrassing

sounds when you move.

The clothing you settle on should have most of these characteristics:

Strength and durability

Layered, so you can layer up or down to suit the season

Allows freedom of movement but not too loose

Offers camouflage

Not brightly coloured

Impregnated charcoal or similar to suppress odors.

Consider easily detachable grasping points


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Most of the above are quite straightforward. But the concept of Easily

detachable grasping points may be new to you so I will explain. There is a

species of small lizard in South America that has a long detachable tail. If a

predator grasps the tail it will quickly detach allowing the lizard to escape

with its life.

You can employ the same strategy by lightly sewing a large number

of lengths of material (approx. 2-3 feet in length) from your clothing. If a

Zombie attempts to grab you it will likely get a hold off one or more of these

detachable grasping points giving you valuable time to get away.

If you want to get a little more technical you can learn even more from

these little lizards. When the lizards tail detaches it wriggles about violentlywhich acts to keep the predator s attention on the tail and away from the

lizard. If you incorporate a small plastic bag of strong human scent that

stays with the detachable length of cloth and breaks open when it is

removed, you can increase the length of time you have to escape before

the Zombies get after you again.


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The utility of your anti-Zombie gear can also be greatly enhanced by

keeping the following items in your pockets:

Small LED light- Include one with the option of a red

light to preserve your night vision

The Flowcharts from this book

Strong gloves

Water purification tablets

Nutrient rich compact food bars

Can opener

Compass

Wind up radio


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If you have long hair you should keep this neat and held close to your head

with elastic and or pins. Or better still, cut it off ! Long hair is an invitation

for Zombies to grab hold of it and reel you in like a mackerel on a line. So

unless you really want to be the fish of the day I suggest you keep your

hair short and neat at all times. The same principle also applies of course

to facial hair as well as any other hair you might have that is getting too

long.

Pockets can be very dangerous things to have during an apocalypse.

Well, actually it isnt the pockets themselves that are dangerous but the

contents of the pockets. Coins, keys or lucky charms jingling in your

pockets act like a siren call to all Zombies within hundreds of yards.

Wouldnt it be awful if your lucky charm doomed you to Zombification? You

probably wont even be able to get your money back. So, if you have


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metallic objects in your pockets, be sure to pack them in something soft,

like a handkerchief or some rag, to stop them from jingling.

FOOTWEAR

Did you know that one of the biggest predictors of success in any land-

based survival situation is having adequate foot wear? Even just slipping

on a pair of flimsy tennis shoes gives you a great advantage over someone

going barefoot. This is because shoes protect your feet against injuries that

can greatly impair your rate of movement thereby magnifying the potential

negative effect of a whole range of other dangers such as packs of

Zombies desperate to snack on your frontal lobes.

Can you imagine how much dangerous debris a Zombie apocalypse

could generate? And when you consider that just a single small shard of glass could slice your foot open and dramatically reduce your survival

chances, you can see why it is essential to take precautions. Furthermore,


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even a tiny cut you barely even notice could have disastrous consequences

later on due to infection. This may come as a surprise to you, but Zombie

apocalypses (I promised Id give you the plural form) are notoriously

unhygienic environments.

Give yourself the best chance by wearing sturdy but comfortable

shoes during the day, and light but strong shoes while asleep. Also

consider using odor-eaters and remember to practise doing up your

shoelaces while running so that you can be ready for action at a moments

notice.

On a related note, dont even think about going commando .


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Dr Eton Says

You might be tempted to include a

cross or other holy item to ward off

the Zombies. This might make you

feel safe, but in fact they do not

deter Zombies in the slightest.

If you must wear something, a

Chuck Norris T-shirt is a better

bet.


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GATHERING INTELLIGENCE

Never forget the old adage Forewarned is forearmed . Now this doesnt

just apply to keeping yourself on alert for early signs of the apocalypse, it

also means knowing beforehand where you will go and what you will do

when the apocalypse does start. That means being thoroughly familiar with

the terrain between you and your next objectives.

Have you scouted out your surroundings and identified the best

available temporary shelter? Is it far enough away that Zombies cannot

reach it in anything under 12 hours? Does the location give you a good

view of all possible approaches? Does it offer protection and adequate

cover if for some reason you are unable to move on quickly? Are there a

number of good routes away from the shelter?


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In order to gather this information you will need to spend a lot of time

getting to know every inch of ground between you and the nearest

temporary shelter. What transportation options are available? Can you find

your way there at any time of the day or night? Learn to make your own

way ther e without reliance on a satellite navigator. You wouldnt want to

depend on it to get to safety only to have it fail just when you cant

remember whether you are supposed to turn at the next lights or go straight

on.

Consider taking a job as a taxi driver or pizza delivery guy. These

occupations will help you to become very familiar with the roads in your

area.

Invest in a helicopter ride around the neighbourhood and take your

camera and video camera with you. Once back on the ground study those

images like your life depends on it; someday it just might. Prepare a

detailed and highly accurate map of the area and study it until you are able

to reproduce it in full within 30 seconds on any surface with any writing

implement. Study it until you cant bear to look at it again . Study it until you

see it in your dreams. Then study it some more.


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Of course you also need to have fully elaborated back up plans in

place. Can you get to your designated temporary shelter from any location?

Remember, there is no guarantee you will be at home when the

apocalypse starts. What if you cant get to your preferred shelter ? Is there

one or more reasonable alternatives? The answers to all these questions,

and more, need to be available to you at all times and at a moments notice.

FOOD AND WATER

Dont stress too much about f ood. You can easily keep some nutrient rich

food bars with you at all times and have some other light weight options like

dried noodles close at hand. The reason you dont need to stockpile a lot of

food is because regardless of whether you are in an urban, suburban or

country environment, there will be food available. There are a number of

generic survival guides that do an adequate job of covering how to

scrounge and forage for food so I will not go over that here.


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In any case, water is far more important than food. While it is

obviously much preferable to be fed, you can survive for some weeks

without food, but not much more than a few days without water. In hot

weather you might not last even a day especially if you are exposed to the

sun. Again, there are other sources where you can study up on how to find

drinkable water, but in addition, try to keep a minimum of 10 pints of water

with you at all times. A small back pack or refillable bladder will make this

quite easy to manage.


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INDEX

A

affirmation 16

aircraft 22

ammunition 10, 11, 28

apocalypse 11, 14, 15, 17, 18, 19, 21, 24, 28, 33, 34, 37,

38

Apocalypse - 0 -, 27

attention 31automobile 14

B

back up plans 38

biological 12

boredom 24, 26

buildings 20

C

chemical 12

civilization 19

combat 21, 23

contaminants 12

corduroy 30

corpses 19

crash 22

D

distributed stockpiling 14

E

enemy 23

escape 20, 31

experience 19, 24

F

fear 24

fire 23, 26

foot wear 34

G

going commando 35

H

head 15, 33

helicopter 38

helicopters 19

helmet 28

house 11


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I

impending 27

information - 0 -, - 1 -, 37

K

katana 23

knowledge - 1 -

L

limbs 23

M

mindless 21

mindset 15

movement 30, 34

N

nature 20

normal 26

nuclear 11

O

opportunity 26

P

pistols 24

pizza 38

plan 10

positive thought 16

practical 28, 30

practice 14, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 27

preparation 10, 15, 18, 21, 23

problem 19, 21, 27

process 19

professional 22

R

radio 32

reason 37

rifles 24

roads 38

run very fast 20

S

safety 38

samurai swords See Katana

scent 20, 31

shelter 12, 20, 37, 38

shotgun 23

skills 20, 21

stark raving mad 24

stockpile 11, 14

strategy 31

survival 10, 15, 18, 20, 21, 22, 28, 34

T

taxi driver 38


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G t th FULL t t htt // bi t th t/ bi i l id /

television 26

U

unconscious mind 16, 18, 19

undead 12, 17, 26

unhygienic environments 34

V

very dangerous 33

Visualization 18

Z

Zombie - 0 -, 10, 11, 14, 15, 17, 18, 21, 27, 28, 31, 32, 34

Zombification 33

zombie apocalypse preparation guide

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