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Today’sMatureLifestyle Aug - Sept 2010 Issue
“Get a Grip”
Dating Tips after 40 page 23
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2 | TML Magazine
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CONTENTSTML
CEO, Senior Editor, & WriterMaria Howard
Operations & Circulation ManagerWilliam Howard I I
EditorGracie Borbon
ContributorsMichael Henderson
[email protected] Borbon
[email protected] Flores
[email protected] Iiga
TML - Today’s Mature Lifestyle Magazine is Published by
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Today’s Mature Lifestyle
Magazine
Facts about Drinking Water page 11
Cover story - Get A Grip With Jay Miller
6
Editorial from Senior Editor
3
The Liquid you Body needs most: Water
11
Choosing a Gym9
Living with Diabetis and Excersing
10
Money Saving Tips When Traveling
14
Business Directory18
Professionals in ourCommunities
16
Extras - La Cocina and Myrna’s Book Corner
21
Dating Tips after 4023
Con
tents
6 | TML Magazine
Get a Grip Foundation
Written by Maria Howard
When first going to the “Get a Grip Foundation” (GAG) located at Hid-den Valley golf course in Corona Ca., I never thought that I would see the amazing things that were going on there. To say the least Jay Miller, one of the founders is one of the most outstanding human beings you can ever meet. When sitting with them, it began like any other story, but that assumption was soon extinguished. Instead the story you are about to read is a story about a family with differ-ent abilities. These men and women that work at GAG are a tight niche family that work together to make the foundation successful.
Miller is the guy running everything. Well running is not quiet the word, he’s just the guy with the bigger office. Miller, can’t do it alone, he counts on everyone’s input to help him fulfill his vision. Here’s Miller’s
story.
Miller’s idea of GAG came about 13 years ago while he and his wife were va-cationing in Hawaii. After doing as much as he could during his time in Hawaii, and his wife not wanting to do anything but layout on the beach and read, he re-quested more activities from his wife. She then said to him, “Think of a business that you would like to start.” He starred at the paper with a pen in hand and thought of what would be more satisfying than teaching kids to play golf and working with them on their education for free.
After leaving Hawaii, Miller went on to see how his idea would come to a fruition. He consulted with his business partner Robert Hoff, and thus began the paperwork. They had come up with a great idea, a wonderful way to help kids 7-18, but no name. The day came when the attorneys needed a name for the orga-nization and Miller and Hoff had been out of town when his wife got the call from the attorney about the foundation being approved. All they needed was a name. When Miller’s wife couldn’t get a hold of either partner, she blurred out then name of the organization to the attorney, “Get
a Grip Foundation”. Miller and Hoff were utterly surprised at the name be-cause it fit so well to what they were trying to do.
When the foundation started they had to go out and hire the staff for this growing enterprise. And along came Michael Davis. Davis used to work as a bouncer and a teacher. Da-vis is so big, when you see the word bouncer in the dictionary you see Davis’ picture, and would not want to be approached by that guy, espe-cially if it’s being removed from any establishment. Davis was brought to the foundation after Miller and Davis met at a social event. Both Miller and Davis began to talk about how they had both received their degrees from Big 10 Schools and as the conversation progressed Miller was impressed with Davis and from that point on was the beginning of a great friendship and partnership with GAG. Now Davis and his wife both work at the foundation helping with students tutoring program. Davis specialty is mathematics and helps with as much as he can with their mathematics and other subjects, and of course let’s not forget, the golf lessons.
www.tmlmagazine.com Aug - Sept 2010 | 7
Cover S
toryThe next member of the staff is Dr. Preston Lear. Lear is a psychotherapist. Hoff and Preston have been old time friends. Hoff offered Preston the job as an afternoon coun-cilor and to help around the foundation. Preston drives in from LA a few days a week. He has his own practice in LA but takes the time to come and work with the kids. He takes them out to the golf course and lets them talk about their problems so that they are in a calm environ-ment. It allows the kids to speak freely without anyone listening or feeling like they are under a microscope.
During the time of interview-ing these guys there was a young lady who was going through some issues with her family. And it was amazing
to see how everyone got involved from Miller himself, Lear, Davis, and even the computer guru Song Tran. Tran is more than just the computer guru for the foundation. He has a degree in history with a minor in psy-chology. And, he is perusing a degree in Arabic. He is spending his sum-mer in Jordan to further his studies.
As for the last addition to this won-derful family I want to mention the one and only Pat Burke. Pat used to play in the PGA tours. He played for 8 years and stopped playing back in 2001. Burke comes from a line of golf players. His parents were both golf pros. His mother Joan Burke is one of the first women that played in the LPGA tour. And by the looks of it, he took right after his parents. Burke is one of the golf instructors at the foundation. The foundation is not just another
non-profit organization but a fam-ily where kids can work on their golf, school, and any problems they face. Get a Grip has been around since 2001 and with the staff and organization they have, this group is not going anywhere. We need more organizations like this to help our communities and our kids espe-cially with everything our kids face every day in our society. The staff members that I mentioned are only a handful of them. They have a much bigger staff and every one of them does their part in making sure that all the kids get 100% of their atten-tion. Great job “Get a Grip”!
To get more information on “Get a Grip Foundation” please visit www.getagripfoundation.org
You can also call 951-737-9020
8 | TML Magazine
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www.tmlmagazine.com Aug - Sept 2010 | 9
Health an
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CHOOSING A GYM
By William Howard (1) BENEFITS (2) WHAT TO LOOK FOR (3) COST
When choosing a gym you want to evaluate these factors; a good location, affordable pricing, variety of services and a place where you will be able to meet your fitness needs and goals. You can tour most health clubs or visit their web sites. Some sites offer visitors passes, so you can try before you buy. Word-of-mouth is also helpful. According to a recent tally by the International Health, Racquet and Sports Club Association (IHRSA), there are 29,636 health clubs in the United States with more than 41 million members.
Benefits of a gym membership includes equipment such as free weights, weight training , treadmills, cycling, and elliptical machines. Swimming pools, basketball courts, indoor tracks and day-care facilities are other benefits that most health clubs provide. Classes such as; Pilates, yoga, aerobics, kick boxing, spinning, and stretching. For your special needs there are certified personal trainers to help you design your exercise plan. Some health clubs offer dietary plans, juice bars, and massages which normally are associated with an extra fee. Making new friends can be part of the benefits that health clubs offer. Check with your employer to see if they have a corporate wellness program, you may already have access to a health club or be able to get some kind of discount through your em-
the doctor will hear you now
want bet ter health care? star t asking more questions. to your doctor. to your pharmacist. to your nurse. what are the test results? what about side effects? don’t fully understand your prescriptions? don’t leave confused. because the most important question is the one you should have asked. go to www.ahrq.gov/questionsaretheanswer or call 1-800-931-AHRQ (2477) for the 10 questions every patient should ask. questions are the answer.
ployer.
The first thing to look for is the location. Depending on your schedule it would be beneficial for the location to be close to home and or work. Both would be great. The club should have up-to-date equipment, a variety of classes, and a professionally certified staff. When you tour the club notice cleanliness, in the locker rooms, steam rooms, saunas, pools, and work out area.
Ask about billing options, cancellation policies, other ex-tra fees for classes, and day care fees. With several types of memberships options, you can pay month-to-month, limited term, or all inclusive which normally includes all the clubs in the membership network and normally no restrictions. Most membership payments want to withdrawal directly from your bank account or they may require first and last month’s membership dues. You may have the option to pay full membership up front, but beware these memberships types may not be renewable.
Remember, when selecting your health club make it about what you want and need! If you have any health conditions be sure to check with your doctor before working out.
the right path. The next step is to find a bal-ance with your eating, exer-cise and rest routine. In the overwhelming handouts of in-formation, one good source to keep handy and to follow is the nutritional triangle (). A way to look at this change is not to call your eating habit a “diet.” Some-times it is just easier to call it “a change of lifestyle”.
Exercise is necessary to feeling better every day. As a diabetic, I’ll share that for me it was a difficult beginning. I did not begin a strenuous exercise program, I just began to walk. Walking is much easier to begin with because it gives you
the cardio and builds your physical strength. I began walking a quarter of a mile and pushed myself as time went on. As I kept up the daily walk I saw my blood level drop. It was important that I kept an open com-munication with my doctor adjusting my insulin as needed. At the present I walk six miles along with other exercise pro-grams and am down to a low dosage of insulin. Exercise has become part of my life, not just for my physical being but has added a better outlook on life.
10 | TML Magazine
T
Living with Diabetis and Excerising
Written by SEVEN
Many of us at this 40 plus age are usually set in our ways. We’ve been doing the same thing especially when it comes to our diet and daily rou-tines. Now that you’ve been diag-nosed with diabetes, which can cause aggravation in having to modify your lifestyle, this is where you have a chance to make a change for the bet-ter…for the rest of your life.
According to the Dietary Guidelines for Americans, 2005, “eating right and being physically active aren’t just a “diet” or a “program” – they are keys to a healthy lifestyle.”
It can be hard to grasp that your life change begins now, but if you’ve already talked with your doctor, fam-ily and nutritionist, you are headed in
We must not forget the last element in this whole change…rest which is a key source. Even though eat-ing right and exercise will put you in a schedule that is fitting , you must make time to rest. Now I’m not saying to be a couch potato, I’m saying that eight hours of sleep helps you recover what you have lost during the day. According to Beach Body Newsletter it states: If you don’t get enough sound sleep, your body will NOT receive the proper restoration it needs to com-plete or succeed with any fitness program. It may be difficult in the beginning to change your way of life when you’ve been doing the same thing day after day, but just remember that you are important and just take one day at a time in making that change of lifestyle for your better tomorrow.
1-http://www.health.gov/dietary-guidelines/2-http://www.helwys.com
www.tmlmagazine.com Aug - Sept 2010 | 11
Health an
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The liquid your body needs the
mostWritten by Will Howard
WATER FACTS:Clean drinking water is essential to all life forms. Access to safe drinking water has improved steadily over the last decades in almost all parts of the world. It is estimated by 2025 more than half of the world’s population will be facing water-based issues. A recent report (November 2009) sug-gest that by 2030 and some devel-oping regions of the world, water demand will exceed supply by 50%. Approximately 70% of the fresh water is consumed by agriculture.
Continued on Page 12
12 | TML Magazine
Drinking plenty of water is critical to health, especially nowadays when so much of the food supply has been contaminated by pesticides, chemi-cals, additives, and more.From Wikipedia, the free encyclope-dia:
BOTTLED WATER VS TAP WA-TER:
Purified water is essentially tap water that has been purified through a distillation, de ionization, or reverse osmosis process. Safety standards for bottled water and tap water are the same with a few exceptions. Tap water is often fluoridated, most bottled water does not contain fluoride or chlorine. Spring water is water that flows naturally from Earth and is col-lected directly from its natural source. Mineral water is sprayed water that contains dissolved metals and other trace elements (at least 250 ppm) that come directly from the source. Water is essential no matter how you drink it. Most people can safely (and inex-pensively) Drink water straight from the tap. If you want to improve the taste of your tap water, you can buy a
Continued from page 11
water filtration pitcher, which reduces the amount of fluoride and chlorine in tap water. There is little or no regulation of bar water in this country, and in some cases, bottled waters have been found to be contaminated and/or of lower quality than ordinary tap! Generally, municipal systems test for more contaminants than bottling companies. About one quarter of all water is actually tap water.
SOURCE: NATURALCURES.COM
DRINKING WATER IS IMPORTANT FOR GOOD HEALTH:
It’s estimated that your body is about 60 to 70% water. Blood, muscles, lungs and brain all contain much water. Water regulates body temperature and transports nutrients to all organs. Water transports oxygen to your cells, re-moves waste, and protects your joints and organs. Signs of mild dehydration include constant pains in joints and muscles, lower back pain, headaches and constipation. A strong odor to your urine, with a yellow or amber color indicates that you may not be getting enough water. 20% of your water needs will come from the food you eat. The
rest of your water needs should come from drinks you drink. Water is the best choice. Soda has loads of sugar and sports drinks contain electrolytes which may have some vitamins and nutrients. When you exercise you should drink 8 ounces of water every 20 minutes you are active. If you drink alcohol, you should drink at least an equal amount of water. When traveling on airplane, it is good to drink 8 ounces of water for every hour you are a board on the plane.
Please send any fitness tipsand/or
health tipsto
William Howardat
Check out his website at
www.fitwillhoward.com
www.tmlmagazine.com Aug - Sept 2010 | 13
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Money Saving Tips When Traveling
by Michael Henderson
So you are planning your big dream travel vaca-tion, but are
concerned about the cost. Although
the when and where of the plan are the main points, it is the little details in-between that
can really make a trip worthwhile. By utilizing some of the following travel tips, you may be able to achieve memorable trip while saving money and precious vacation time.TransportationFly “open-jaw” - If you are going to travel to multiple cities during the course of your trip, instead of a purchasing a round trip ticket, it may be cheaper overall to fly-into your 1st city and fly out of your final city. This can save in transit costs between destinations. For example, if you are planning a trip to Rome, Bologna, Florence, and Milan, it will most-likely cheaper and definitely less time-consuming to fly-into Rome, take a train between points, and fly home from Milan.
Use Rail and Local Transit Passes - For extended multi-city trips, an inter-city/country rail or local transit pass can be a big saver. In Europe, Eurorail offers multiple-use rail passes within and between many countries for a fraction of the cost of buying multiple individual trip
tickets.
Take Regional Airlines – For short multi-city travel, small regional airlines can be a convenient and lower-cost option to the big carriers.
Turn layover cities into destinations - Instead of just pro-viding a “fly-through” tourist experience, desirable layover cities can also become part of your vacation itinerary. For instance, you can break up what is normally a round trip route to Bangkok via Hong Kong into segments. Buy the round trip to Hong Kong instead and then use a low-cost re-gional carrier for the short round trip to Bangkok. The cost difference may actually be minimal and worth the net-gain of an extra regional tourism experience.
Take advantage of off-season and weekday discounts - The travel pricing laws of supply and demand apply are very well illustrated by the noticeable discounts that can be acquired by flying to certain destinations outside of the peak tourist season and during weekdays.
Last minute cruises – A week-or-two before launch, cruise lines are usually very aggressive in trying to fill vacan- cies. If you have an open vacation timeframe, seek out these last-minute book-ings for great cruise bargains.
Fly into cheaper nearby cities
or airports – The
bus-iest
hub air-ports are
often more expensive to
fly into. For instance, Paris’s
Orly can sometimes be a cheaper and less-hectic alterna- tive to the busy beehive of Charles de Gaulle.
Lodging Private homes instead of hotels – Instead of a hotel, it may be cheaper to rent a private home or condo in your target destination. To protect yourself in the case of a dispute, use a credit card and book it through a reputable vacation
14 | TML Magazine
Often, the best deals can be found just off of the beaten path – Even a few blocks from a major tourist attraction or district can make the difference between paying tourist prices versus shopping and eating like a local.
Sightseeing
Use taxi drivers as tour guides – For the right price, private taxi drivers may sometimes be able to per-
sonally transport you to various sights over the course of a day. This is especially mutually
beneficial in countries where a tourist can pay a fraction of a normal tour price
and a driver can make more than they
would for one normal day’s work.
Casual eavesdropping – If you are at a major tourist attrac-
tion and within the vicinity of a tour guide speaking
loudly in your language, you can often enjoy the collateral
benefits of a professional guided tour without the expense.
Currency Exchange currency at the cheapest location
– Instead of using airport currency exchanges or a bank in your home country, going to a local bank
in a foreign destination city or using an ATM may actu-ally yield a better exchange rate.
rental organization or website. Just like an eBay user, if a private owner wants repeat business, they will be diligent in protecting their seller rating.
Travel and sleep at the same time – You can sometimes save time and money during multi-city trips by using booking overnight rail or boat routes and sleeping along the way to the next destination.
Search for dis-count codes - You can some-times
find good deals on ho-tels and rental cars by searching online for discount codes. Popular sites like couponmountain.com and retailmenot.com specialize in listing current promotional codes on a wide range of items and services.
Bargain with hotels directly – Call area hotels and ask to speak to a man-ager when trying to negotiate a good nightly rate.
Take advantage of membership discounts – If hard bargaining is not your forte’, you can still take advantage of pre-negotiated group discounts by mentioning your membership in organi-zations AARP, AAA, or even Costco.
Shopping & Dining
www.tmlmagazine.com Aug - Sept 2010 | 15
Travel D
estination
tions
16 | TML Magazine
William“Bill”Woods
Written by Maria Howard
William “Bill” Woods is 47 years old and was born in Fresno California. His family moved to Compton, Cali-fornia and was there most of his childhood. At the end of Woods’ sophomore year his mom moved the family to Gresham, Oregon where Woods spent his junior and senior year. Before working at CRM Financial, Woods and a partner owned a Chem Dry carpet cleaning fran-chise for 10 years. Woods decided to follow his men-tors advice about learning the Real Estate business. Woods took the time to learn about finances, mortgages, and real estate and then went out and got his real es-tate license. He landed a job with CRM Financial where he has been for the last 12 years. Not only is Woods a successful financial advisor but is happily married to Ana Lucero. Woods and Lucero also work together.
While sitting with both of them for an hour in half it dawned on me at how impressive this team is, with Anna handling all the Hispanic clients and Woods with his real estate license makes for a great team. And let me not forget Chuck, the owner of CRM who is al-ways so full of insight and knowledge. After laughing about some of the antics that happened at CRM, it just seemed like a great place to work at and get all your fi-nancial needs which include but are not limited to, Real Estate, Mortgage, Taxes, Compromises, and Notary. Not only is Woods a successful financial advisor but while everyone else goes home after work he goes to another job. Woods spends his evenings volunteering as a men-tor and coach to young men. Woods has been mentoring and coaching for 17 years. Wood’s says that he got into mentoring and coaching because ” he understood what it was to grow up from a single parent home, and he knew what it was to need a father figure in his life”. Woods was once the President to Sweetwater Valley little league and coached at Chula Vista Parks & Recreation. Now, Woods coaches and mentors for the Bonita High School basketball team. Kudos to you Coach Woods for working with our young men and setting a GREAT example to all!
CRM Financial619-906-5565
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Prof
essionals in
our com
munities
William Darrel RandallWritten by Tiffany Iiga
William Darrell Randall is 36 years old and after a life of many ups and downs is finally in a place where he feels he’s starting a successful life. He measures his success “by the quality of life regardless of money, fame, etc.” Darrell, as he is affectionately referred to by those he regards as friends, grew up in St. Louis, Missouri as an asthmatic child who was chronically ill and hospi-talized. His mother, a faithful Christian woman as he recalls, died at the age of 34 to terminal cancer diagnosed too late to determine its origin; doctors labeled her years of symptoms as stress. He and his younger sister were left with a father of atheist beliefs who he feels “gave a real view of the world and what it was like and be-cause of it I was mature.” Darrell grew up as the emotional sup-port for his sister and had an active role in her life, as their father
1 in 8 Americans is struggling with hunger. Including people like your barber, the person who stocks the shelves at the grocery store, or the man who sells parts at the auto store. Who’s the 1 in 8 in your life that needs help? Go to feedingamerica.org to see how your support can help those in need.
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passed 10 years later, with Darrell 18 and his sister 15. He recalls believing that he would never make it to the age of 30, with his chronic health problems and his Christian view of an atheist world. Darrell is currently a music minister for the Potters House in Waipahu, Hawaii who spends his spare time creating music. He also donates his talents and that of his fellow church members’ time by performing music and dance for the inmates at Halawa Prison in Halawa, Hawaii. Darrell is also the single father of a daughter diagnosed with As-perger’s disease, a form of autism in which the mo-tor skills of a child are developmentally challenged. Diagnosed at the age of 4, 8 years later is progress-ing at level comparable to that of her peers, a huge feat! After many years of challenging health prob-lems, Darrell, a trained fitness professional, is also in the best physical shape of his life; able to run the 40 yard dash in 5 seconds and bench presses 360 lbs. regularly. Darrell is also in the process of open-ing his own security consultant business later this month, an undertaking that has his excitement. Darrell is an example of the many people with such endurance for life. He mentioned to me that life is just starting out for him, “I’m 18 now!” He de-scribed the joy he feels in finally being the person he always wanted and ready to take on life as it comes. His optimistic attitude is not only conta-gious but honorable and proof that life can continue to change.
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Where to find Today’s Mature Lifestyle Magazine
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Extras
written by Myrna Flores
Welcome Readers to this edition of Topshelf. This month I have succumbed to a fad that I know my readers are dying to find out if it’s worth reading.You see them at your local bookstore and everywhere you turn. I am of course speaking about Pride and Prejudice and Zombies by Jane Austen and Seth Gra-ham-Smith. (Quirk Classics $12.95).
You have probably seen the gruesome cover showing a zombie woman dressed in a Georgian time period dress with blood on it and won-dered what is all the hoopla about. Seth Graham-Smith has taken great liberties with our Jane Austen. Our heroine is still of course the lovely Elizabeth Bennet who cannot only dance but apparently is a martial arts expert and deadly with a short sword. It seems that a mysterious plague has hit England where
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the dead walk and feast on the liv-ing and the Bennet girls have all been trained in the Orient as well as by their father, who is very proud of their fight-ing skills.
Instead of Mr. Darcy admiring Lizzie for her “fine eyes”, he is also impressed with her fighting skills with the undead also referred to as
“unmentionables”.
There are also other liberties taken with the story. When Elizabeth walks to Netherfield to check on Jane, 3 unmentionables assault her, which she roundly beats with kicks to the head and the use of her short sword.Jane Austen this is not! Mr. Gra-ham-Smith has basically hacked into one of our favorite love sto-ries, as well as a great piece of lit-erature, and just inserted zombies. The original work is there in the background, barely, and zombies are everywhere.
If you want to read a great piece of literature, read the original Austen you won’t be disappointed; but if you enjoy reading about the undead then this book is for you. I prefer my dead to stay buried but you might enjoy the gruesome story.
Whatever you decide for yourself, know this great literature is to be enjoyed for its beauty. Hacking into great literature is just a way to try to make money…so save your pennies on this one folks and if anything, pick up the original, it’s a much better told story.
22 | TML Magazine
DATING AFTER 40
Wrttien by Felisa Winfield
Many of us who’ve been married for years and now divorced, raised our children, giving them all the essentials in life, many times putting our own needs and dreams on the back burner, have suddenly found ourselves’s single
again with an empty nest. Now is a good time to realize there may need to be a few changes made. Having to discover who you are again? So as you journey through this book called life, unsure of what is out there and what works for you. Here are some pointers:
1. Don’t feel like you have to com-pete with younger women. Ladies, we don’t have to dress like we are twenty something to be appealing to men. Rather than choosing the plung-ing neckline that shows too much cleavage, opt for a top with an open neckline but still shows your form without being too revealing. It’s still a sexy look.
2. In the age of the “Cougar” please don’t rule out dating a man that may be a few years younger than
you. Keep some things in perspective when dating a younger man. Depending on the age difference, there may be very little you may have in common.
3. Do make a list. We tend to know what we want or don’t want at this time in our lives. Putting down on paper your likes and dislikes gives
you a guide to go on. Do give him a chance, remem-bering we’re not perfect either. You may find that your list will change. We don’t have to compromise our standards just to have someone by our side.
4. Start changing your mind-set about available men to date. Pay no attention to what society says about good male availability. Far too many women say that a good man is hard to find.
The moment we stop looking for a good man, a good man comes our way. Get involved in social events. Check out some web sites on-line if that’s your thing.
5. Remember to exercise and get fit. Get busy moving that body for your
health first. Exercise makes us feel better about ourselves. Men like women that are healthy from now who you will meet at the gym.
6. Lighten up and Laugh! Laugh-ter does the body and the spirit good! Realize that others cannot make you happy; we have to de-cide to be happy. Be a person that has presence and gives positive energy to those you meet. It may mean stepping out of your comfort zone. When going through a dif-ficult time in life keep in mind that your date does not have to know every play by play. Remember drama is not something anyone wants to deal with at our age. No matter how bad our problems are sometimes we have to laugh to
keep from crying. So laugh and spread the joy!
7. Relax And Enjoy The Journey. The end result does not always have to be marriage. Just have a good time with dating, stop stress-ing over the small things! Be a fun person for yourself and you will see how people around you will enjoy you as well.
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Datin
g Aft
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Keeping it positive while dating…Written by Hector Borbon
A few years back my son and I were walking along Venice beach. We stop to listen to this young man singing and playing his guitar. His guitar case was open in front of him, and some people would stop to listen for a minute and tossed money in it as they walked away. He sang of how badly he had been treated by women and how terrible his love life had been. I don’t know if he sang about his life or of men’s lives in general. As we listened to him sing, an older gentleman approached him. He was going to toss money in the case or at least that’s what I thought, but instead he interrupted the young man from singing. He asked him politely if he would change the song he was sing-ing. He told him in a very gentle voice, “I don’t really appreciate you singing these types of songs that speak badly about women”. The young man looked at him and responded with a smile, “I
guess you are one of the lucky few that have never been hurt by a woman, like most of us have”. The older man looked at him with a smile and said “On the contrary my young friend, I have scars in my heart that will never heal. Some so profoundly deep that it penetrated my soul. But the most memorable days of my life have been spent with a woman, which I will hap-pily take to my grave with a smile” He tossed a few dollars in the guitar case and walked away. As he was walking away the young man changed the song he had been singing and started to sing a more romantic and uplifting song.
Remember:We have a very bad habit of looking at past and current relationships in a negative way, especially if they ended badly. We look at the other person’s faults and blame them for it. We sel-dom take responsibility for our actions and our part of how bad the relation-ship was or is. I realize that some are so abusive that you can’t help but to say it wasn’t your fault. I agree! But
what we need to start doing, like the older gentleman in my story said, ”let’s look at the beautiful moments we shared with each other and build our relationships on that or build new ones based on the beautiful things we learned and experienced from our past relationships”. So for our mar-ried couples, think back to your memorable days and continue to build your relationship on those thoughts. For my single folks, remember we will have dates from hell but that doesn’t mean that there is not someone out there for you. So continue your dating until you find someone that will not just complete you but, com-pliment you. And as for the non dating folks out there, that might be afraid to date; all I have is one word of advice, DATE. How else will you be able to build fond memories that last at life time?
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