1 The Yateley Magazine | October 2014

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A Note from the EditorHello and welcome!

It seems the winter is finally catching up with us as we draw closer to Christmas. The first frosts of the year started this week and firework season is in full swing. In that spirit we bring you some fantastic stories and articles themed around the winter months.

We take a dive into history to explore the origins of Guy Fawkes night, and why we should really remember the fifth of November, along with some helpful hints on how to keep your pets safe

and happy when the fireworks start going off. We also see the work of local rescue Happy Hedgehog with their latest success story - baby hedgehog Tonic.

A few local organisations have come forward with some lovely pieces for us - including the Yateley United Football Clubs and local business Prestige Wigs. We also have our latest student journalist showcases her talent with a travel journal of London.

We have been overwhelmed by the support of our readers and our advertisers, and we thank your faith in us. We value your continued support, and as always, urge you to get in touch and share your stories.

Get involved in the conversation! @YateleyMagazine

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6 Tonic The Hedgehog

What would you do if you found a baby hedgehog out in the cold and in need of help?

11 Rise & Unite

We interviewed chair of the Yateley Sports CIC Colin Ive about the recent developments with Yateley United Football Club.

14 Remember Remember The Fifth of November

Bonfires and fireworks are now a tradition of Guy Fawkes night across the UK. We take a look at the origin of the tradition.

20 Firework Phobia

Towards the end of the year we all tend to go a bit firework mad - and whilst they are beautiful and a fun way to spend an evening, if you have pets they can sometimes have unwelcome repercussions.

24 Lend Me Your Ear... Or Your Hair

Hair loss is an unnerving prospect for anyone - one that many people battle with every day, but no one really wants to think about. But people like Prestige Wigs are there to help.

November 2014

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26 The Yateley Society

Once again the Yateley Society have been working hard to preserve and improve the natural beauty of our town.

29 Come Die With Me Character Capers

Halloween may be over, but New Years is right around the corner! Why not enjoy the festive celebrations with a murder mystery themed dinner party for your loved ones? The folks at Come Die With Me bring you a sneak peek into some of their favourite characters.

33 Student Journalist - Sophie Audus

42 What’s On in Yateley

48 The Yateley Directory

November 2014

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Autumn is always a difficult time of year for hedgehogs, and with all the leaves and bonfires there are all sorts of risks for our furry little friends. But what would you do if you found a baby hedgehog out in the cold and in need of help?

Well thankfully local DJ Dave Ricards (from Tonic Parties and Events) knew what to do - and came to rescue of a very ill wild hedgehog, rushing it from Hook Veterinary Practice where it was admitted to the Happy Hedgehog Rescue Centre in Yateley. The hoglet (baby hedgehog) was brought in after being observed for 3 days by a local woman. She had seen the hoglet out in the daytime for around 3 days in a row - and while she had been putting food out for it, she didn’t realise it was ill. When it was finally brought in, the hoglet was fed and treated for internal parasites.

Jayne at the hedgehog rescue explained the warning signs the hoglet (affectionately named Tonic) was exhibiting. Hedgehogs are primarily nocturnal animals, and are rarely seen out and about during the day. When they are young they stay with their mothers for around 8 or 9 weeks old. By this time they have opened their eyes, developed their full spines and learned to forage for food from their mother. According to Jayne, Tonic had only recently been separated from his mother, and was struggling to find decent food.

A hedgehog’s normal diet consists of insects, beetles, caterpillars and sometimes snails and slugs (hence why they are known as the gardeners friend). They do no harm in your garden, but they need the variety in their diet to stay healthy. Because Tonic was struggling to find food, he was surviving primarily on snails and earthworms - prey that was slow and easier to catch. The problem with this diet is the risk of a condition called ‘high worm count’. This occurs when a hedgehog eats too many worms and slugs, which in themselves contain microscopic parasites like lungworm (the same

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thing that can infect household pets). These parasites cause confusion in the hedgehog, and they can no longer tell night from day, so will often be found wondering around in the daytime. This presents huge risks - mainly in the form of being hunted by other animals like birds, cats and dogs, and even flies.

No one likes to see a sick animal - and quite often at this time of year people will put out bowls of dog food to help support the hedgehogs in their areas. This is a fantastic way to promote healthy hedgehogs - but every now and then we find one who is not doing so well. So we want to tell you how to recognise when a hedgehog needs help, and what you should do.

How Do I Know If A Hedgehog Needs Help?

Mostly we encourage hedgehogs to be left alone in their natural habitat. They are resilient creatures and can survive a lot. There are generally 3 main reasons you should rescue a hedgehog and bring them to a centre.

1. A Hedgehog Lying Out In Daylight.

As we mentioned before, a hedgehog moving about or lying still in the daylight is rarely healthy. Hedgehogs don’t ‘sunbathe’, and when they curl up in their natural defensive way, it is often difficult to tell if and where they are hurt. They might be injured or have an internal parasite infection. If you see a hedgehog out in the daytime with flat spines (lying against its back and not standing up) - they may be dehydrated.

2. Baby Hedgehogs

Hedgehogs can be born from May right until the end of October - and the young ones can sometimes lose their way or stray from their mother. If you find a baby hedgehog out alone in the day, it is at risk from flies (who will lay their eggs, which hatch into maggots and kill their host) or becoming prey to another animal.

3. Autumn Juveniles

By the end of November no more hoglets will be born, and they will all be starting to go into hibernation. At this stage, any hedgehogs that haven’t reached a safe weight for hibernation (around 450g) might not survive.

If you find a small hedgehog out after dark in winter, they need medical attention and care until they are big enough to survive on their own.

How Do I Rescue A Hedgehog?

Once you are sure that the hedgehog needs your help, you should bring it to a rescue centre, like the Happy Hedgehog Recue Centre in Yateley. Before you touch a hedgehog, please make sure you are wearing thick gloves or use an old towel. This is not only to protect you from their sharp spines, but also from any infections or parasites they might have. Pick it up and put it into a deep box that has some torn up newspapers or hay inside for them to shelter under. Prepare it for travel by offering it some water and some dog or cat food to eat. Do not give a hedgehog cow’s milk. This is because their stomachs can’t digest the lactose in the milk and will upset their stomachs. Cover the box to protect from flies or drafts while moving and transport to a rescue centre where it can be properly cared for.

Jayne from Happy Hedgehog Rescue sends a huge thanks to Dave of Tonic Parties and Events as this isn’t the first time Dave has rushed to help an animal in distress. She adds ‘Dave also helps us by collecting newspapers from The Woking News and Mail every fortnight and he is very supportive of our rescue and has offered to DJ for us many times.’

For more information on hedgehog rescues, please visit the Happy Hedgehog website.

REACHINGYOUR

POTENTIAL

Remember what it was like to be a teenager? a mix of possibilities, opportunities, hormones and boundaries, homework and exams, people to see and places to go. Learning to be independent can be hard enough. If a Young Person has had distressing or troubled early childhood experiences, it can just add more stress to an already emotional time.

Foster carers for teenagers need particular skills to carry out what can be a very varied and challenging job - sensitivity to a Young Persons situation, patience, tolerance and understanding. A foster carer needs to provide stability, safety and secure boundaries to keep them safe, while also encouraging them to spread their wings and take their fi rst steps towards becoming happy, responsible adults. Most importantly, you need to be there for them, have good communication skills, provide consistent boundaries, negotiate effectively when diffi culties arise and have a sense of humour!

We will provide support 24/7 and extensive training plus a fi nancial package.

Make a difference. Contact National Fostering Agency today.

Or Text FOSTER5 to 88020 with your full name

Could you Foster and make a difference?

www.nfa.co.uk0845 434 5767

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We interviewed chair of the Yateley Sports CIC Colin Ive about the recent developments in Sean Devereux Park and what might be next.

‘On June 1st 2013, following several years of discussion the four Yateley based football clubs, Yateley FC, Yateley Green FC, Yateley Juniors FC and Beaulieu Boys and Girls FC, agreed to come together as a single community focused club. Thus enabling the sum of its parts to achieve the objective of providing a common good quality standard of football and facilities for our community which would otherwise never be achieved.

The key to this successful unification was the commitment of the senior members of these clubs, some of whom were also involved in the establishment of Yateley Sports CIC organisers of the Yateley Music Festival ‘Gig on the Green, Yateley’. The result has been a single club, recognised as being the second largest club in Hampshire by the Hampshire FA, consisting of 27 youth teams, and 6 adult teams with the motto of ‘United for the Community’.

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With the club established it has begun to develop ambitions for significantly improved facilities for its members, both present and more importantly future. In the past all of the pitches the teams used at Sean Devereux Park were leased to them by the local council, Yateley Town Council, who had in turn been provided with a lease on the land by the gravel company CEMEX (the land being former gravel workings filled in the 1980’s). To enable the club to progress with their ideas for developing an increased number of football pitches and new facilities they, along with the Yateley Hockey and Cricket Association and with the assistance of Yateley Town Council, approached CEMEX enquiring about the possibility of a long lease which would be key to attracting grants.

The response to this request was initially disappointing with very little extension offered. However, the reply also included a purchase price, and a price which, due almost entirely to its categorisation as ‘leisure land’ was attractive to the clubs. As a result of the success of the first three years of ‘Gig on the Green, Yateley’ funding was available for the football club to purchase their portion of the land and in turn enable the cricket and hockey association to purchase theirs.

With funds from the continuing success of the Gig on the Green real progress can be made in attracting further funding in the form of grants and sponsorship enabling the football club to achieve its ambitions and at the same time preserve and protect the land at Sean Devereux Park for our community. I look forward to sharing with you details of the clubs development plans as they are published.’

With more plans in the work and big things on the horizon, we are looking forward to great things from the Yateley United clubs in the coming months. Watch this space for more information.

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The Gunpowder PlotOn November the 5th 1605 the leader of the Gunpowder Plot, Guy Fawkes, was arrested whilst guarding a large amount of explosives that had been hid-den underneath the House of Lords. It’s common knowledge that the mo-tivations behind the gunpowder plot were entirely political - but the target of the attack was much more targeted than just ‘the entire parliament’. The conspiracy was initially concocted by a group of provincial English Catho-lics, whose goal was to assassinate King James the First of England, who was a well known protestant. The night of the assassination was carefully chosen so that King James and most of his parliament would be in residence in the House of Lords.

Did You Know?

If you are familiar with our own Monteagle House, then you may know of the rumours that he himself was one of the conspirators of the Gunpow-der plot. Local legend tells us that Lord Monteagle was one of the few to escape the assassination attempt on parliament, either because he received a letter from his cousin warning him to stay away or because he knew what was going to happen because the plot was hatched in his home. There are many different theories around this, including the idea that the gunpowder used was stored in Lord Monteagle’s basement before it was transported to London. There is concrete evidence that Lord Monteagle rented a home in Yateley around the time of the gunpowder plot - but we leave you to decide the rest.

The Observance of November 5th

Bonfires and fireworks are now a tradition of Guy Fawkes night across the UK. This tradition was started by King James the First himself, who decreed that his subjects to celebrate the attempt on his life by lighting bonfires (as long as they were ‘without danger or disorder’). In January of the following year, just before the remaining traitors were executed, the Observance of 5th November Act was passed.

The Act was passes as a method of thanksgiving, and a way to theoretically make church attendance mandatory. It was believed by a Puritan Member of Parliament Edward Montagu (who proposed the Act) that the Kings sur-

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vival of the attack was a form of deliverance by divine intervention, and this was worthy of official recognition. Since then every year that has passed the day has become more of a celebration to some, and a cause of rebellion for others. Indeed there are millions of Guy Fawkes supporters still active in the world, operating under the banner of Anonymous.

Anonymous

Anonymous is most commonly known as an international network of activ-ist and hactivists, united under the banner of ‘Anonymous’. Born relatively recently in 2003, the organization has been responsible for a series of huge publicity stunts, including the attacks on government, religious and corpo-rate websites. Members can be recognised when they gather in public by the wearing of stylised Guy Fawkes masks - keeping the spirit alive. In modern times they are now known as anti-capitalist activists whose aim is to protest against political oppression through their well organised attacks and stunts.

Every year on the 5th of November, the day a famous revolutionary made a stand against parliament for their policies and stances, thousands of mem-bers throng to central London to protest, all wearing Guy Fawkes masks. This has been daubed the Million Masks March and last years’ march saw 15 protestors arrested after conflicts with the police broke out. While the protests are designed to be peaceful, sometimes tempers run high, this years members climbed onto Nelson’s Column to set off fireworks.

The Full Version

Another little known fact - the verse we all recite - the one at the beginning of this very article is only the start. There have been several variations of the poem over the centuries, and they encompass different themes and angles of the day. Below is a version of the poem designed to combine all other versions.

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Remember, remember!The fifth of November

The Gunpowder treason and plot.I know of no reason

Why the Gunpowder treasonShould every be forgot!

Guy Fawkes and his companionsDid scheme and contrive,

To blow the King and ParliamentAll up alive.

Threescore barrels, laid below,To prove old England’s overthrow.

But by God’s province, him they catch,With a dark lantern, lighting a match!

A stick and a stakeFor King James’s sake!If you won’t give me one

I’ll take two,The better for me,

And the worse for you.A rope, a rope, to hang the Pope,

A penne’orth of cheese to choke him,A pint of beer to wash it down.

And a jolly good fire to burn him.Holla, boys! Holla, boys! Make the bells ring!Holloa, boys! Holloa boys! God save the King!

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Towards the end of the year we all tend to go a bit firework mad - and whilst they are beautiful and a fun way to spend an evening, if you have pets they can sometimes have unwelcome repercussions.

We love the way they look and enjoy running around waving sparklers watching them explode and fall through the sky - but for our pets fireworks can be incredibly frightening. Every year hundreds of animals suffer from a phobia of fireworks - but they don’t have to suffer in silence. There are things you can do if you want to make sure your cat or dog feels safe and secure during the fireworks this year. The key here is to plan ahead. This month to help prepare for the festive season, we give you some tips to help prepare your pets as well.

• Firstand foremost,make sureyourpet is safeandsecure indoorsduring peak fireworks times. Try to keep them indoors at night between November 1st and January 2nd if you can, just to be safe.

• Whennightfalls,closethewindowsandcurtainsandplaymusic.This will help muffle and mask the sound of the fireworks and serve as a distraction.

• Ifyourpetisshowingsignsoffearoractingout,it’sbesttoignoretheir behaviour. Try to only intervene if you think they are in danger of hurting themselves.

• Avoidpunishingyourpetfordestructivebehaviourduringfireworks.They are acting out because they are scared, and punishing them will only make things worse in the long run. Similarly avoid over fussing your pet if they seem distressed, during these times they might see a friendly stroke as an attack.

• Lookintosettinguppheromonediffusersinyourhomeifyourpetisparticularly sensitive to fireworks. You can find these for both dogs and cats from most pet retailers or vets. These diffusers disperse calming chemicals into the room and help relax your pet.

• Ifyouthinkyourpethasaphobiaoffireworksthenabehaviouraltherapist for pets might be able to help. One of the things they recommend is gradually exposing your pet to loud noises (such as those on the Sounds Scary CD) in the lead up to fireworks season.

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Don’t Forget Small Animals

Fireworks aren’t just scary for cats and dogs. Small animals are often startled by loud noises in general, and fireworks can be a particularly stressful time for these less resilient animals. If you have rabbits or ferrets who live outdoors, bring them in if you can. Cover the cages of small animals in blankets so they are well sound proofed, while leaving enough of a gap for them to look out. Smaller animals are usually more comfortable in the dark, so make sure they can’t see the flashing lights, and give them plenty of bedding to burrow down into and hide in.

It’s important to remember that your pets can be incredibly sensitive to the noise and light of fireworks, and they won’t understand that they aren’t in danger. Some pets will be fine with fireworks and not react at all, but around 80% of pets suffer firework phobia. There are several cases a year of pets whose owners have not taken precautions like the ones above that result in injury and sometimes even death. Do what’s best for your pet - protect them this firework season.

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Lend Me Your Ear... Or Your Hair?Hair loss is an unnerving prospect for anyone - one that many people battle with every day, but no one really wants to think about. But people like Prestige Wigs are there to help.

It’s a topic that makes a lot of people uncomfortable, but in the hands of professionals like Shona from Prestige Wigs, the mobile wig service, hair loss need not be a headache. We have known about the fantastic service that Prestige offer, but this month we wanted to offer you a sneak peek into their world - and dealing with hair loss, either through Alopecia or Chemotherapy is what Shona specialises in.

‘I’m so enthusiastic about my mobile wig business, and knowing that I can make a difference to someone’s life is wonderful. I bring all of my stock to your home, or hospitals if you’re in hospital. I travel all over the South East and West, and am completely flexible on times - I can even visit evenings and weekends if needed. Dealing with hair loss, no matter what the reason, can be such a daunting thing - which is why I try to make the whole process of wig shopping as easy and effortless for you as possible.’

When someone says the word ‘wig’ we all too often think of the colourful novelty wigs you find in fancy dress shops. And while these wigs are great for a game of dress up - as a replacement for normal hair they are laughable. Luckily wigs have improved greatly over the last few years, and now there are many different high quality options available -human hair, heat resistant hair and even synthetic hair. The choice is amazing. And if you opt for a very good quality synthetic wig, there is absolutely no need to spend huge amounts of money getting human hair.

‘So many of my clients say to me that as soon as they are diagnosed with Cancer, their biggest fear is having no hair – which is totally understandable, especially for a woman. I will try and match a wig to as near to their own hair as possible, and sometimes the wigs are a little “wiggy”, so I will thin or cut these for you free of charge – this makes the wigs have move movement and a lot more natural.’

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It’s such an important thing to get a good quality wig when you are in this position. This is mainly because cheaper wigs disintegrate much more quickly and don’t look very natural - resulting in that fake look you’re actually trying to avoid. With a good synthetic wig, they only need to be washed around every 6 weeks, and return to exactly the same style every time.

‘All my clients have said that to be able to walk out the door and feel normal, without getting the sympathetic looks from passers-by, has made dealing with their illness so much easier. A good wig, matched to your style, gives you back your self confidence and the ability to carry on with your day-to-day life.’

It’s important to understand that the loss of hair due to illness is an incredibly sensitive subject, and it’s unfortunate that it still carries some stigma. But with help from Shona, those who suffer from it can walk with their heads held high and their confidence in tact.

For more information on the mobile wig service, please visit www.prestigewigs.co.uk or call Shona on 07594 747659

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The Yateley SocietyOnce again the Yateley Society have been working hard to preserve and improve the natural beauty of our town.

The Yateley Society works closely with the Yateley Common Conservation Group to help protect and preserve the beautiful landscape of Yateley. From maintaining the low heathlands to fixing stairs and steps, they work tirelessly to keep Yateley green and blossoming. You can join this wonderful group of people and their green thumbs once a month on the common and help support our towns natural beauty.

This month we are looking at the Yateley Common Conservation Working Group and the fantastic work they have been doing over the last few months. Continuing on from the first write up about the volunteer conservation group, this is what the working party achieved in the Sunday morning session at the end of June.

The task that Jean Cheadle (Yateley Common Ranger) set us was to repair and improve a set of steps leading away from Wyndham’s pond (just up from the dam). The old steps were worn and were too narrow for pedestrians to use safely. The following images show the work as it was being done, and finally when it was completed. Everyone involved thoroughly enjoyed the project and seeing the end result of our teamwork.

The steps at Wyndham’s Pond before work was started.

The conservation group working party linked to the Yateley Society meets for 3 hours at 10.00am on the last Sunday of every month at Wyndham’s pond car park (you’ll find the car park on the left hand side coming up Cricket Hill, about 100m past the Cricketers pub). The group helps the Yateley Common Rangers with a wide variety of jobs that are required to maintain the rare lowland heath that makes up the common. You don’t have to be a member of The Yateley Society to join the conservation group – just come along and join in. It is a great way to get some fresh air and exercise.http://www.yateleysociety.org.uk/conservation/

Right: The team, hard at work.Below: Job’s a goodun! The finished steps.

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Come Die With Me Character CapersHalloween may be over, but New Years is right around the corner! Why not enjoy the festive celebrations with a murder mystery themed dinner party for your loved ones? The folks at Come Die With Me bring you a sneak peek into some of their favourite characters.

Here at Come Die With Me we strive to create great characters with real depth that you can sink your teeth into. For example, this chap:

Character Profile: Felix Van Der Lunen

The industrial revolution was kick-started by visionaries in engineering and design. Thanks to brilliant minds of Brunel, Bell and Thomson, Britain was the shining light of progress and technology.

Felix Van Der Lunen is a man cut from the same cloth – a creative and mechanical genius, whose reach is only exceeded by his imagination. Born in Holland, he was educated in the finest institutions in Europe

before coming to London to reveal his genius to the world. He claims to get inspiration from his dreams, where fantastic form and function combine to create impossible things.

However, the impossible seems to be his downfall. While his mechanical marvels are indeed a spectacle to behold, they just don’t seem to be able to work properly in the real world. During the Great Exhibition in 1851, Felix unveiled the marvel of the age: steam-powered dirigibles! They managed to take off and do a whole circuit over Crystal Palace before they all exploded and crashed. Several people were killed and Felix was left humiliated. But not defeated.

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Felix has earned the patronage of Sir Arthur Winslow to design autonomous farming equipment, the application of which could revolutionize the agricultural sector. This new opportunity may be Felix’s chance to show the world his true genius…

Playing a Character

One of the great things about attending a murder mystery evening is the opportunity to take on a role and do some acting. But getting into character is something that comes more easily to some than others. So to help you out, we had a chat with actor Alex Watts, the voice of Come Die With Me, for his three top tips:

1. Facts

You have to start with what you know. What’s in your invitation, your character app or booklet? You can build out from here, but it’s best to do it on a firm foundation of facts.

2. Imagination

It would be no fun if you couldn’t just make stuff up. Starting with the facts you do know, you can invent more details to fill in the gaps. Where did your character go to school? What do they do in their free time? This will give you fun details to drop in as dinner progresses, and will make a character feel more like your own: something you’ve created, not something you’ve memorised.

3. Voice

A character’s background (as learned or made up, above) informs how they speak. If a player is playing a rich English lord, they might speak with a lazy drawl. If they’re a bright, young thing they could speak in a speedier, more clipped fashion and drop lots of contemporary slang (stolen from P.G. Wodehouse). If they’re a servant or a self-made millionaire, they could speak in a chipper cockney accent:

“Lord love a duck, I’d better have a cup of Rosie Lee after all those apples and pears.”

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Dressing the Part

Another essential part of getting into character is your costume. Murder Mystery games will usually give you an idea of what your character should where when you receive your invitation.

These days, in addition to rummaging through your dressing up box, there are plenty of online options. Fancy dress costume websites, or places like Etsy.com, where you can find a treasure trove of costume ideas.

We have pinned a few of our favorites for Invitation to Murder on our Pinterest page.

Come Die With Me: An Invitation To Murder is available on iTunes priced £4.99.

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Our Student Journalist piece this month is once again brought to us from Yateley Sixth Form College. Sophie Audus is one of Yateley’s younger residents at 17, but has high hopes for the future. Once she completes her studies at Yateley she is looking to stay local and go to Surrey University, where she will study law hoping to become a solicitor. She visits London regularly, which is what inspired the piece she submitted to us this month - and hates dungarees after reading a Vogue article as a style model, which inspired some of her previous fashion articles.

Oh, London! TravelogueAs I touched down in London town I think it’s safe to say I felt as though I was home. It was impossible not to feel at home when a gaggle of drunk middle aged women, all in dresses 3 sizes too small for them and heels 3 feet too high scream, giggle and watch admiringly as I trot down the cobbled pavement with my disgustingly creased map. After managing to prize my eyes off this sight I wandered over to the other much more appealing though slightly less intoxicated sights and buildings scattered around me.

London in the day was spectacular; however London in the night was something extraordinary. Everywhere I looked there was something and when my eyes revisited that place something or someone different was there. I must say now, I did not come to London for the conspicuous array of different individuals and flamboyant night life but that is precisely what I got, and I for one am not complaining.

During the day, as you’d expect, most of the infamous tourist attractions were overflowing with people from all different walks of life. I even managed to see one woman with her two children all wearing matching Thomas the Tank Engine rucksacks and t-shirts. Cute, yes, but let us bear in mind one child was around the age of 6 and the other around 19. Oh, London, you never fail to surprise me! The London Eye was fun I suppose; however I personally do not see the appeal of spending almost half an hour rotating almost painfully slowly in a pod made virtually of glass with a bunch of tourists who obviously haven’t seen a few buildings and a bridge before. I should probably mention my slight fear of heights.

Regardless of this though, what did surprise me was how large London actually is. Past all the normal tourist destinations often associated with

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London lies what seems a completely different land.

The next place I dared myself to venture to is The Southbank. On arrival, the first attraction that was flung onto me was a ‘London Duck Tour’. As you can tell, I was devilishly confused. Why on Earth would anyone want to spend an hour touring the ducks in London?

I’m pretty sure the woman wearing neon pink earmuffs carrying a small agitated child picked up on my confusion and informed me that in fact I was mistaken. It’s both a road and boat tour. The bus drives around the back streets of London for a bit, before quite literally plummeting head first into the Thames and taking you up and down, passing landmarks such as Houses of Parliament, The London Eye and Big Ben. You basically pay hard earned money to risk your own life and be stranded at sea. Or in a polluted river with a very mild current. But still, I wasn’t sold.

The London Dungeon seemed much more up my street. Tooley Street to be exact. The London Dungeons provoke a sense of masculinity and bravery. I thought if I went in there alone to get up close and personal with Jack the Ripper and the infamous barber of Fleet Street, Mr Sweeney Todd, if any females were present I’d certainly appear as a man of steel. Thinking about it I should have dug out my old cape. They’d all be flocking at my feet. Although hopefully not literally. How weird.

I don’t want to give anything away, but if this has persuaded you to venture to The London Dungeons, you’ll know the worst part when you see it. Or feel it. Guy Fawkes was a bad man. *shudders*.

After my ever so exhausting day traipsing round London town going in The Natural History Museum, Madame Tussauds, Trafalgar Square and even doing a spot of shopping (which resulted in an ‘I heart London’ t-shirt and small plastic bulldog. Resistance is not my forte). I decided to give a second night in a whack. It is a well known fact that London at night is almost unrecognisable. For every light that goes out in boring people’s flats, it seems thousands of lights from the central town arise. I went to town (no pun intended) that night.

It seems as though Londoners are as willing to give you alcohol and friendly company at night as they are to give you a swift middle finger and glazed look in the day. Great news! I went into a bar known as ‘CalloohCallay’ on

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Rivington Street. It looked rather plain from the outside I must say, nothing more than a regular everyday bar in London; however, the saying ‘never judge a book by its cover’ fits perfectly here.

If the name doesn’t give away what kind of atmosphere you would experience, knowing it was based on a line from Lewis Carols ‘Jabbawocky’ may give you a hint.

The bar was completely bustling and it still surprises me to this day how I managed to keep all my limbs intact. There was even an option to book into the hidden lounge if you weren’t feeling the vibe in the bar. The bar itself was massive offering what seemed every single type of alcoholic beverage known to man and horse. It seemed my fellow Londoners weren’t afraid to try anything. I was offered a cocktail with the utterly ridiculous name ‘Swizzle Dee, Swizzle Dum’. I kindly accepted. And after that swizzle dee and swizzle dum was certainly how I was feeling.

37 The Yateley Magazine | October 2014

38 The Yateley Magazine | October 2014

39 The Yateley Magazine | October 2014

Why Advertise in The Yateley Online Magazine?As well as being a hub for community news and stories ,The Yateley Online Magazine is proud to support local businesses by offering an affordable advertising platform.

As a monthly online publication, there are many benefits to choosing us over a more traditional, printed advertising medium. We are the perfect way to help you target Yateley business advertising. For local businesses we offer a far higher success rate for your investment over traditional pay-per-click online advertising. Pay per click advertising costs vary between £1 and £3 per targeted hit, while The Yateley Online Magazine receives thousands of views a month from local Yateley residents and those from the surrounding towns, allowing you to target your advertising more effectively and get quality views for significantly less investment.

Not only that, but as part of our advertisers package we also include you in our online Yateley business directory absolutely free of charge! Being in our Yateley business advertisers directory helps direct traffic from our website to yours, increasing your search engine ranking and helping more people see who you are and what you do. To be seen not only by the people of Yateley but also increase your visibility online, all you need to do is advertise with us.

Over the last 7 months The Yateley Online Magazine has grown incredibly quickly, and we are now pleased to be able to offer accurate statistics of our readership for our advertisers. Our magazine currently has an average readership of between 1500 and 2000 people a month for each issue, and this is growing every month. Our readers spend an average of 5 minutes actively engaging with the magazine, and we are very proud to retain 70% of readers until the final page (this is well above the industry standard 45%).

Our website also receives about 1000 unique users every month, mainly visiting our blog and our online business directory, which lists all of our current advertisers. Around 95% of our readers are based in Yateley and the surrounding towns (Fleet, Farnborough, Aldershot etc), so we have a wider reach than other local magazines. We are also one of the most cost effective

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options to get your business out there - with the cheapest rates you will find in the area.

Our rates are charged monthly, with no VAT to pay, and are as follows:

1/4 page - £251/2 page - £50Full Page - £85Inside Front - £95*Double Page - £140

* Inside front is allocated on first come first serve basis per month.

We also offer discounts to any advertiser who orders multiple months in advance. If you chose to advertise in 2 issues, you get 5% off, 3 issues is 10% and 4 issues is 15%.

So if you are looking to advertise your business or event to local people, please get in touch and see what we can do to help you.

41 The Yateley Magazine | October 2014

42 The Yateley Magazine | October 2014

Whats On In Yateley?Every Monday Morning, Craft and Chat at Yateley Library - Yateley Library, 10am

Bring along any craft you like and enjoy a gossip and a natter with likeminded crafters!

Every Tuesday Afternoon, Storytime at Yateley Library - Yateley Library, 2.15-2.45pm

Stories, songs and crafts for 2-5 year olds.

Every Friday Morning, Baby Rhymetime at Yateley Library - Every Friday Morning, Yateley Library, 10.15-10.45am

Enjoy songs and entertainment for 0-2 year olds.

Every Friday Lunchtime, Eversley Lunch Club - Every Friday Lunchtime, St Mary’s Church

Join the residents of Eversley in the beautiful surroundings of St Mary’s Church for lunch and chat.

Every Saturday Morning, Little Dippers Swimming Classes – Every Saturday morning, Yateley Community School

Take a dip into the pool with your little ones with the Little Dippers swimming classes. Suitable for children 2 and a half years and over, your children will learn to swim like ducklings in no time. Spaces are limited and are already being booked, so don’t miss out! Call 01252 418250 to book your place!

8th November, Yateley Fireworks Fiesta - 8th November, Yateley Fireworks Fiesta, School Lane, 6pm onwards

Once again Yateley & District Lions Club will light up the skies of Yateley with another magnificent Yateley Fireworks Fiesta. We normally have a very

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good show and are kindly supported by the local community. All the money raised goes towards helping Westfields Junior School and Yateley Lions charities.

8th And 9th November, Wessex Guild of Craftsmen Show - 8th and 9th November, Wessex Guild of Craftsmen Show, Serendipity Garden Centre, Hook.

The Wessex Guild of Craftsmen in association with Serendipity Garden Centre will be holding a 2 day exhibition and sale of traditional and contemporary crafts made by the Guild members. Held at this recently opened garden centre in Hook, the Guild show will be in the main building alongside the cafe, which will be serving drinks and snacks throughout the day. This is a chance to purchase unique handmade items not only for Christmas but for yourself as well. The show will be open from 9- 5 on Saturday and 10-4 on Sunday.

Entry is free and is held at:Serendipity Garden Centre, Reading Road, Hook, RG27 9DB

11th November, Egg Box Owls Toddler Tuesdays - 11th November, Egg Box Owls Toddler Tuesdays, Surrey Heath Museum Camberley, 10.30-12

Free drop in fun and craft sessions for the under 5’s. There is a suggested donation of 50p per child to contribute to the upkeep of the venue.

13th November, The Rat Pack Live - 13th November, The Rat Pack Live, Princess Hall Aldershot

Boasting stars from the West End, a brand-new spectacular featuring the kings of swing - Sammy Davis Jr, Dean Martin and Frank Sinatra - is coming to town. Described as possessing ‘all the panache and attitude of Sammy, Dean and Frank during their Vegas heyday’, hit shot Rat Pack Live combines the sound of big bad swing with an all star cast. Song highlights: New York, New York, That’s Amore, My Way, Mr Bojangles, Taht’s Life, Ain’t That A Kick In The Head, I’ve Got You Under My Skin, Mambo Italiano and Little Old Wine Drinker Me.

Tickets £21, concessions £20

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15th November, Farnborough Craft Guild Show - 15th November, The Farnborough Craft Guild Show, Heatherside Community Centre, 10am-4pm

We have hand crafted individual designs of the highest quality on sale and display. Craft demonstrations will be held throughout the day. Come along and talk to the makers and find a uniquely crafted fit. Refreshments will be available throughout the day. Heatherside Community Centre, Camberley, Surrey, GU15 1BB

15th November, Aldershot Christmas Lights Switch-On - 15th November, Aldershot Christmas Lights Switch On, Aldershot Town Centre, 4.45pm

The afternoon event starts at 12 noon and will be full of free family festive fun. Making a special appearance will be Elsa and Anna from Disney’s Frozen and characters from the Princess Hall panto. There will also be street entertainment, animals of all shapes and sizes and of course Father Christmas to make this a very special day! Back by popular demand is CBeebies presenter and star of ‘I Can Cook’, Katy Ashworth, who will be switching on the lights at 4.45pm with help from Father Christmas, the Mayor of Rushmoor, Councillor Diane Bedford and cast members from this years Princess Hall pantomime, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. Throughout the afternoon there will be lots to keep the little ones entertained, including: Tom’s Tricks balloon modelling, a children’s farm, Father Christmas, children’s fairground rides, Bubble Joe and his amazing bubbles, Birds of Prey and much more. Katy Ashworth will hold a special meet and greet on the Lower Mall of The Wellington shopping centre from 3-4pm.

28th November, The Blues Brothers Experience - 28th November, The Blues Brothers Experience, The Harlington, Fleet 7.30pm

The Blues Brothers Experience tickets are not on sale yet - but watch this space! A special Christmas show, the bar opens at 7.30 with doors at 8 and the show at 8.30.

Tickets are £12 standing or £14 for reserved seating.

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29th November, Aladdin - 29th November, Aladdin, South Hill Park, runs until the 3rd of January

The magical, mystical world of Agraba comes to South Hill Park this Christmas brought to life by the acclaimed team behind Snow White and Jack and the Beanstalk. Reckless ragamuffin Aladdin has an adventurous streak which keeps getting him into trouble. He defies the law and looks upon the face of Princess Jasmine - and all at once he’s off on a whirlwind journey and head-over-heels in love. Come and join the adventure - packed full of music, mayhem and a little bit of magic!

Various performance times - please see the website for further details. Price Bands:

A: Standard £18.25, concessions £15.25, family £61B: Standard £17.25, concessions £14.25, family £57

Christmas Eve & Boxing Day: Standard £19.75, concessions £16.25, Family £63

30th November, Christmas Craft Fair - 30th November, Christmas Craft Fair: Hants and Surrey Borders Riding for the Disables, Memorial Hall Church Crookham, 2-4pm

Come and enjoy a coffee and cake whilst browsing the variety of carefully chosen stalls at our Christmas Fair. Entry is £1 per adult and free for children.

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Clubs & SocietiesMusic in Yateley:

Flute Salad - The ‘Salads’ offer flautists of any age and ability the chance to play a wide variety of music in a fun, friendly and safe environment.

Vivace Cantamus - We are a ladies choir based in Hawley. We sing a var-ied repertoire form Mozart to Show Tunes and everything in between. We rehearse in the Hawley Church Hall on Sundays between 5.30 and 6.30, and are now recruiting new members for the choir, all abilities welcome.

Yateley Sports Clubs:

Yateley Cricket Club - Established 1881 and now located at Sean Devereux Park. Catering for players of all standards, with four teams in between divisions 1 & 9 of the Thames Valley League and Sunday friendlies with 16 ECB qualified coaches. Sean Devereux Park, Chandlers Lane, Yateley, GU46 7SZ – enquiries@YateleyCricketClub.co.uk

Yateley United FC - YUFC was created by the merger of local football clubs: Beaulieu Football Club, Beaulieu FC, Yateley Green Football Club, Yateley Green FC, Yateley Football Club Adults and Yateley Football Club Youth Contact: chair@yateleyunitedfc.com

Activities in Yateley:

Yateley Camera Club - The club now has an ongoing membership of between 60 and 70 individuals and provides both beginners and more experienced photographers a place to meet and exchange ideas. All types of photography, from traditional to digital, are used. New members are very welcome and current members are always willing to give help and advice to beginners. If you would like more information, please visit our website.

Frogmore Dance School - With nearly 40 years of proud history in provid-ing dance and musical theatre training to both children and adults, Frog-more Dance School is the areas premier teaching centre fit to meet all your needs. Contact: info@frogmoredanceschool.com

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Yateley & District Gardening Society – The Yateley and District Garden-ing Society (YDGS) was established in 1967 by a few local amateur gar-deners who were keen to get together and share gardening knowledge and experiences.

Yateley Charities:

Yateley Conservation Volunteers - Join us for 3 hours conservation on the last Sunday of every month. The groupmeet at 10am at Wyndham’s Car park, off Cricket Hill lane, and help with practical tasks such as scrub clearance, boardwalk building and path maintenance. This is a great op-portunity to get involved and help maintain the town’s natural beauty. The Ranger’s House, Cricket Hill Lane, Yateley, Hampshire GU46 6BB - tel: 01252 870425 - northern.sites@hants.gov.uk

Happy Hedgehog Rescue - We are a small, self funded, local animal rescue in Yateley on the borders of North Hampshire, West Surrey and South Berkshire. Our work is funded entirely from the kind donations of web-site visitors and friends of the rescue.

Vulcan to the Sky Club – The ‘Vulcan 558 Club’ was launched in May 1997 in response to the public’s continuing interest in the conservation of XH558 – the last Avro Vulcan to be retired by the RAF. Contact Jo Ayres – joayres.ayres@gmail.com

Camberley Cats Protection - The Branch is run by cat mad volunteers who are dedicated to helping make the lives of cats and kittens in our area better. Our webpages are updated regularly to make sure we provide up to date information on our cats and the activities going on in the charity to help the welfare of cats and kittens.

Yateley & Yateley Green WI – Contact: Sheila Farmer – sheila.farmer3@ntlworld.com

Yateley Townswomen’s Guild – Contact: Robyn Kent – bob.robyn@btint-ernet.com

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Yateley Scouts / Guides etc:

Yateley District Guides – Contact: Susan Brennan – 01252 665250 – aw10340@yahoo.co.uk

3rd Bramshill Scouts - Scouting in Yateley has been part of the local com-munity now for 100years. However in the seventies Yateley was experienc-ing growth with families moving to the area with young children. Scouting was to prove so popular that the existing Yateley Scout Group, now called the 9th Bramshill, could not accommodate all those boys wanting to join. Every night of the week was used for some meeting and the Group had three Cub Packs, two Scout Troops and one Venture unit.

2407 Sqn Air Cadets - Are you up for fun, adventure, incredible experi-ences and making new friends? Are you looking for something to give you the edge in life? Then welcome to the Air Cadet Organisation (ACO). Better known as the ‘Air Cadets’, we’re a UK-wide cadet force with more than 40,000 members aged between 13 and 20 years. Contact Flt Lt Lynda Bradley: oc.2407@aircadets.org

The information above is provided by the clubs and societies of Yateley. The Yateley Magazine is not responsible for the accuracy of this content.

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Yateley BusinessesAssure Mortgages - With 25 years experience in mortgage advisement and assistance, Assure Mortgages Ltd is your first port of call for highly personalised mortgage services. We limit our operations to a small area, ensuring that we have detailed local knowledge that you can use. Why not call and talk to one of our brokers today?

Bluebella - Bluebella is an award-winning and fast growing social selling Company that creates fabulously fun and flexible earnings opportunities for women. Our mission is to give every woman the means to confidently enjoy her sensuality and our beautiful collection of lingerie and lovestuff does just that. The collection is available exclusively through our fast growing team of Bluebella Consultants and online.

Come Die With Me - Come Die With Me is the next level of murder mystery party dinner experience. Using your iPad and your guests’ iPhones, you can play a new breed of fun and compelling role playing murder mystery game.

Charlotte McGill Writing Services - Need a writer, editor or proof-reader? Look no further! Charlotte McGill Writing Services offers high quality writing, editing and proof-reading services to individuals and businesses alike. With over 4 years of experience writing in both corporate and creative environments, I can help you create and perfect the words that represent your business

Chris Haye Photography - Chris Haye is a commercial corporate photographer based in Yateley. He specialises in photography for business, still life and product photography as well as corporate headshots. Chris is known for producing beautiful advertising and editorial images for web and print.

Hart Taxis - Fleet & Districts only 24/7 taxi service. Executive travel, 1-8 passengers. Local & Long distances. Corporate accounts welcome. Airport transfers. Lady drivers available. 4, 6 & 8 seater vehicles. HM Forces discounts.

Kumon - At Kumon, our aim is for each and every child to become an independent, advanced learner, with a positive attitude to study. By studying the maths and English programmes, our students develop independent

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learning skills and increased self-confidence as they work out how to overcome challenges by themselves.

Phone Joan - If you live in or around Fleet, Hampshire, PhoneJoan will take the stress out of your life by organising and completing the tasks that stop you doing what you really want to do. Our services are designed to enable you to delegate your least enjoyable tasks, safe in the knowledge that they will be carried out smoothly, efficiently and reliably. When your spare time is at a premium, we can help you get your lifestyle back in balance.

Prestige Wigs - Prestige Wigs, mobile wig specialists, serving Surrey, Hampshire and Berkshire. Offering a professional wig service for hair loss due to Alopecia or Chemotherapy, and the chance for our clients’ to restore their confidence and self esteem from our caring and sympathetic wig consultants.

Pastelesta – Drawings and paintings of the people and pets you love made to order with pastel, pencil or paint. You just need to send a photo. We also sell paintings and greetings cards from our original art.

Prints Charming - Photobooths are becoming incredibly popular in the UK party scene having seen success in the wedding/engagement, birthday, club and corporate event areas for a few years.These portable booths enable you to pick a venue of almost any size and capability and have a record of your “do” like no other!

Tilsmere Catering - High quality executive catering for private and corporate functions. Tilsmere has been catering to the local Yateley community for over 18 years, providing delicious food for weddings, birthdays, parties and more. Contact: catering@tilsmere.com, 07976513765

The information above is provided by the businesses of Yateley. The Yateley Magazine is not responsible for the accuracy of this content.