free.every.monthevents . entertainment . arts . culture

issu

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www.thesourceonline.com

colour

THIS ISSUE:Pink dollars come to town

Andrew Durno from HLAH

talks kiwi music

What’s wrong with fluoro?

More Booty Prizes

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It’s AprIl And thIs Is the source. Autumn Is here - the leAves Are chAngIng, the trAnsIent personnel Are swAppIng out And the fAInt snIff of wInter Is In the AIr. whAt better tIme thAn now to dedIcAte our Issue to colour. thIs month we look At colour from every p.o.v. we cAn fInd. Jo helps us fInd our rose tInted glAsses AgAIn, mAtt tAkes A better look At thAt snookI style sprAy tAn you’re sAvIng up for, ned hAtes neon And AdAm cAn’t even see colour (loser). the councIl remInds us of how much colourful goodness Is hAppenIng Around town And the Queen pushes the pInk dollAr. As A specIAl treAt thIs month our Queenstown rocks column hAs been penned by Andrew ‘tAll beAst’ durno - bAss plAyer for kIwI rock Icons heAd lIke A hole. durno unleAshes on the current stAte of musIc And holds nothIng bAck - strAp yourself In, hold on, you’ve been wArned.let’s do thIs. source out.

EDITOR: Scott Kennedy:

scott@thesourceonline.comADvERTISIng:

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SnAIL US: PO Box 689, Queenstown, NZ

FACEBOOK: the source mag queenstown

this month...

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In the psychological phenomenon known as “synesthesia,” individuals’ sensory systems are a bit more intertwined than usual. Some people, for example, report seeing colours when musical notes are played. One of the most common forms is grapheme-colour synesthesia, in which letters or numbers (collectively called “graphemes”) are highlighted with particular colours. Although synesthesia has been well documented, it is unknown whether these experiences, reported as vivid and realistic, are actually being perceived or if they are a byproduct of some other psychological mechanism such as memory.Singer Billy Joel and actor Geoffrey Rush are both synesthetes.

tEChnoFiLE hEaring CoLours

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Are you hurting? Is that purple mark on your shoulder symptomatic of the torment that lies beneath? Have you lost your rose tinted specs?Whether it be the blues or the very mean reds, fear not… everybody hurts, so some dreamers said. Take comfort in your friends, yes. Hold on, ok, (but what to, exactly? The banister? A balloon? Your hat?) Then what? There is only so much whinging even the best of friends can endure and there’s only so long you can loiter on the stairs to Man Street with no reasonable excuse, plus, not everybody has a hat. so, here’s what you do next.1. have a bath. Candles and all that jazz. If, like me, you have no bath, Lakes Leisure hot spa is quite a wonderful substitute, like a bath, but bigger.2. have a really good coffee. My favourite at the moment is from the Shotover Market, where Paul will unflinchingly make my ¾-midi-white-with-one-sugar-and-chocolate-sprinkles, with a smile no less, that’ll have me buzzing for the rest of the afternoon.

3. run up a hill. Depending on the severity of your masochistic streak, there are plenty to choose from, from Queenstown Hill to Big Bad Ben Lomond. nothing beats sitting at the top and surveying your Queendom, endorphins racing through your blood-stream. And if you laboured up at the speed of an earthworm, remember, it’s the thought (of running) that counts.4. write a letter. Pen and paper style, none of this email/Twitter/Facebook rubbish. Feel the ink glide across the page, lick that envelope and send it off knowing that someone will rip it open with glee to relish in the gift of your words within. Many of us are far from home and this is the closest thing to teleporting a little piece of yourself to your loved ones. And if it’s just to your local buddy, well, they’ll like it too.Feeling better? I knew you would.Most good songs and literature are inspired by pain and suffering. Without the blues it’d be all Euro-trash and the Ting Tings. not that there’s anything wrong with them. It’s just that a little soul goes a long way.Love, your average Jo.

BLACK AnD BLUES

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An Artistic response TUnnEL vISIOn

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Tunnel Vision is a new exhibition now showing at The Front Room Gallery in Queenstown. The spark of inspiration for the group show started with the proposal for the tunnel under The Routeburn linking Glenorchy and Milford Sound. Scott Kennedy, one of the artists, explains, “When the proposal for the tunnel first came to light there seemed to be a disconnect, almost an indifferent disinterest from most people I talked to in Queenstown.

There wasn’t a lot of passion about the issue, unlike in gY and Te Anau. It felt like it was a natural step for the local arts community to try and shake people out of their apathy and inspire some feelings on the issue, one way or the other.”

The month long exhibition features a host of Queenstown artists in mediums as diverse as photography, sketches, contemporary jewellery and sculptural installations.

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teapots

The gulper eel is a bizarre looking creature from the deep ocean. Its mouth can open wide enough to swallow an animal much larger which is then deposited into a pouch-like lower jaw, resembling that of a pelican. Its stomach can also stretch to accommodate these large meals. Specimens brought to the surface in nets have been known to have their long whip like tails tied into several knots. The eel grows to 2 to 6 feet and is found in every ocean at depths ranging from 3000 to 6000 feet.

• Goldfish can see both infrared and ultraviolet light

• A cat’s urine glows under a blacklight• Mars appears red because it’s covered

in rust• The rarest type of diamond is green• Grasshoppers have white blood• Red light has the highest wavelength• Turnips turn green when sunburnt• The most popular toothbrush colour is blue• The colour of a chilli pepper is no indication

of its heat (usually the smaller the hotter)• The ‘black box’ that houses an aeroplane’s

voice recorder is actually orange so it can be more easily detected amid the debris of a crash

• Spiders have transparent blood

CoLourtriVia WtF?

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Ethics of EggswhAt’s wrong wIth cAge eggs?As is well known these days, most eggs don’t come from happy hens. Over three million layer hens live short and cruel lives crammed inside wire cages. Nearly 90 per cent of the one billion eggs consumed in New Zealand are produced by hens that spend their entire lives with an individual floor space of less than an A4 sheet of paper. A battery hen can never express simple natural behaviours such as walking, stretching her wings, pecking and scratching or dust bathing. The health of a caged hen is frequently poor. Stress, disease, severe feather loss, brittle bones weakened from lack of movement, exhaustion and poor diet are common.The government is in the process of reviewing the welfare code for layer hens and the proposed alternative are the so-called ‘enriched’ colony cages. These are basically modified battery cages with all the welfare problems of a standard cage and are not an acceptable alternative to existing battery hen cages. ‘Cage-free’ eggs are unfortunately no guarantee of good welfare either. Barn-farmed hens are kept in large overcrowded sheds with

limited space. To reduce aggression and cannibalism, barn hens are often kept in dimmed lighting and usually beak trimmed. Many welfare problems remain due to close confinement and frustration.

polItIcAl ActIon lAckIngSurveys consistently show that 8 out of 10 Kiwis are against battery cages and want them phased out as soon as possible. However, as part of the present review of the Code, the government is expected to ignore public concerns and announce the introduction of new cage systems. 1. You can send a direct message to the Minister responsible, David Carter, asking him to ban cages at www.nocages.org.nz.Consumer power! The consumer sends a message to the industry every time he or she shops. 2. Don’t buy cage eggs, or products made with cage eggs!3. Check out the delicious egg-free recipes on SAFE’s recipes section of the website www.safe.org.nz.

eliot pryor,sAfe campaign director

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traCK rEportSAM SUMMERS(Mt Crighton Reserve)

BURN YOUR COUCH AND GO PLAY OUTSIDE

Anyone who’s been there already will know what a great walk this is. If you haven’t been then it’s time to get off the couch and check it out. The track into 12 Mile Creek is a loop and it’s been recently upgraded by DOC which has made it into a relatively easy stroll - although there are a few steep sections. Leaving the carpark it’s better to cross the footbridge and head up the ‘true left’ (the right hand side looking up). The track takes you up to a great lookout over Lake Dispute before diving back into some great Beech forest and heading back down towards the highlight of the trip, Sam Summers Hut. The hut has been restored and there’s some fascinating info about the history of the area. There’s also a tunnel to explore and some interesting landscapes.Carry on back down the valley and past more relics of the gold prospecting era ‘til eventually you’ll come back out at the car park. A great walk even on a wet day. Go on get out there and see for yourself.

getting there: Drive out along the Glenorchy Road for about 10 minutes ‘til you pass 12 Mile reserve, then it’s next right after the river. time: 1-3 hrs loop. grade: steep but well trodden.bikes: Nope. dogs: Yes, on-leash.

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Fitness challenges

Autumn Colours

Arrowtown Miners’ BandSalmon in Lake Wakatipu

thumbs up

thumbs DoWn

Roadworks and more

roadworks

Shorter days (get out there

and make the most of the

daylight)

Power cuts on deadline day

Colourful toons1. coldplay – yellow2. Grandmaster flash - White Lines3. Prince - Purple Rain4. Goldfrapp - Black cherry5. Joni Mitchell - Little Green6. The Rolling stones - Brown sugar7. new Order - Blue Monday8. Aerosmith - Pink9. R.E.M. - Orange crush10. Rihanna - Red Lipstick

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the bloody stAte of Ithere’s the contents of my nutshell.you know how, back when you were a spotty yoof listening to your latest dead kennedys/minor threat/bad brains albums and your mum comes in and yells at you ‘”turn that rubbish down... I can’t understand a word he’s singing! muttergrumblewhat’swrongwiththebloodykidsthesedays?” well, here’s what’s wrong with the bloody kids these days - god Awful musIc.when I say ‘awful music’ I mean the soulless, passionless, Auto-tuned, churned out, banal “tunes” that offend my aural canals everywhere

these days. where’s the dAnger? the eXcItement? the sheer Awesomeness?I think I’ve now advanced (regressed) from that yoofful state of musical bliss. I find that I not only don’t ‘get’ a lot of the kids’ music - I realise I’m not supposed to. old, so old. I’m fine with that too - cycle of life, yada yada yada.but - and this is a big but - there is a veritable plethora of amazing new (and old) music out there if you’re just willing to dig for it.when it seems that you can pick any safe song off any safe rock/alternave/bbq/dub/bunch of arse radio station and “insert any band name here” it all blends into one very safe generic formulaic pulp.

with Andrew DurnoQUEENSTOWN

rocks

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but the kids love it. don’t they? do they know any better? do they care?contrary to popular belief ‘green day’ are not punk rock. lady gaga is more punk. I want my rock ‘n’ roll to fucking “rAwk ‘n’ roll!”“was Joe strummer in the clash?” I was asked by a young fella at work. “who’s Joe strummer?” from another. I died a little inside - not 15 or 16 year olds but mid twenty somethings with ipods filled with “songs” rather than “albums”.If all you’re going to listen to is the drivel you’re fed on the radio, that’s a very big musical world you’re missing out on. turn the fucking thing off and go find something out

of your comfort zone. take the time to search them out.songs that make you want to stab things. songs that make you want to cry. songs that make you want to hug strangers. songs that make you smile. songs that make you run naked in the streets. songs that make you think. songs that make your hairs on the back of your neck stand up. songs that are just plain fucking awesome!!!!!go forth. listen without mercy. stab. stab. stab.http://www.facebook.com/HeadLikeAHolenZ

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I ended up with an older woman at a club last night. she looked okay for a 61 year old. In fact she wasn’t too bad at all and I found myself thinking that she probably

had a really hot daughter. we drank a bit and had a bit of a snuggle and then she asked if I’d ever had a ‘sportsman’s double’. “what’s that?” I asked. “It’s a mother and daughter threesome,” she said. I said “no” - excitedly. we drank a bit more, then she says that tonight was ‘my lucky night’. I went back to her place. she put on the hall light and shouted upstairs: “mum, you still awake?”................................................Another hint you might be a redneck... You’ve been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

................................................

Two priests decided to go to Hawaii on holiday. They were determined to make this a real holiday by not wearing anything that would identify them as clergy. As soon as the plane landed they headed for a store and bought some really outrageous shorts, shirts, sandals and sunglasses. The next morning they went to the beach dressed in their tourist garb. They were sitting on deck chairs enjoying a drink, the sunshine and the scenery when a drop dead gorgeous blonde in a topless bikini came walking straight towards them. They couldn’t help but stare. As the blonde passed them she smiled and said “good morning Father, good morning Father,” nodding and addressing each of them individually. They were both stunned. How in the world did she know they were priests? So the next day, they went back to the store and bought even more outrageous outfits. Once again, in their new attire they settled down in their chairs to enjoy the sunshine. After a little while the same gorgeous blonde, wearing a different coloured topless bikini, taking her sweet time, came walking toward them. Again she nodded at each of them, said “good morning Father, good morning Father,” and started to walk away. One of the priests couldn’t stand it any longer and said, “Just a minute, young lady.” “Yes, Father?” “We are priests and proud of it, but I have to know, how in the world do you know we are priests, dressed as we are?” She replied, “Father, it’s me, Sister Margaret.”

humour

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By: Ned Myopus

Just say No to NeoN

I fucking hate neon. It all started a few years ago when vintage fluoro was dragged up from the depths of the opshop and an ironic bit of neon pink and yellow was the perfect accessory for every fancy dress party. we all had a laugh and that was supposed to be that.For some insane reason that I can only attribute to the coming apocalypse, neon is back in full rotation. For the love of god why? Speaking for those of us old enough to remember the first lap around the neon fashion catwalk I can speak from experience.I couldn’t get laid wearing it the first time - I’m not wearing it again.It was 1988 - my Ray Bans were pink with black splattered paint, my rat tail was fading into my mullet, my jeans were one size too small and my taste in music would make future me puke. Ski season was just around the corner. I scored a new ski jacket from Mum and Dad to go rip my spread eagles with. The jacket was pitch black with a giant neon pink ‘v’ that started from each shoulder and ended someplace around my

pubescent belly-button.I thought I was hot shit. And it wasn’t until last time I was at the olds’ place looking through the vault of crap that I realised just how ridiculous I looked. The year I discovered girls I was dressed like the guy who directs planes at the airport.

I’m not doing it again. I will not participate in the ironic throwback to the old days; some misguided tongue in cheek wink at how we used to dress. If I subscribe to this faux-trend I’ll be literally making fun of myself. Taking the piss out of when I was most tender, when I was trying to find who I was

in the world all while dressed like a fucking road cone.So the next time you pull on some neon think of all the poor people who only see a puddle of sexless shame and dayglow rejection reflected in your technicolour projective-vomit fashion sense. When I see that glow of fabric designed for special needs kids crossing the street it just reminds me of how lame the past used to be. Besides, you look stupid.

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Colour Me Happy tHe History and obsession of tanning

It would take the most mealy-mouthed of Queenstowners to declare the summer just departing as anything less than pretty damn good, and walking through the memorial gardens, you’d see more than your fair share of healthy tanned bodies getting their dose of vitamin d. Always a familiar scene at airports all over the world: holidaymakers cramming themselves into winged sardine tins to grab their bit of beach time on holidays in the sun.Strange to think that the idea of a healthy tan came about years after the Wright Brothers first flew. It all came about rather by accident. For centuries the idea of being tanned was so frowned upon that women (and maybe the occasional metro Mr Darcy) used to use arsenic as a way of lightening their skin, tanned skin being a sign of outside toil and hard work. It wasn’t until the 1920s that the hugely influential (and rather absent minded) Coco Chanel got sunburned on the French Riviera that the suntan became an indicator of leisure and social elevation, completely

flipping social convention on its head.It has stayed that way ever since. For decades, if we haven’t busted a gut to get somewhere with guaranteed sun we’ve headed to the beach, park, deck or tanning salon in a bid to get that “healthy” glow. Of course, there are the cheats amongst us who go for the Oompa Loompa look with the fake tan/foundation (then spend the next six weeks being routinely mocked behind their backs) as the tanned/sunburnt mob take the dermatological high ground. Though with the passing of the years, I can’t help but think they’re stealing a march on us. Look at the attitudes to tanning and then look at, say, smoking. I think I can see a fair few parallels. In the beginning, it was seen as a healthy exercise, fashionable and sexy, though with the progression of science and the

succession of people, you know, dying from it, it’s starting to lose its gloss.How long do you reckon until the hottest bods go by the nickname of “Milky”?The moths are going to love it.

by: matt booth

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A fractal is a never-ending pattern. Fractals are infinitely complex patterns that are self-similar across different scales. They are created by repeating a simple process over and over in an ongoing feedback loop. There’s also quite a lot of maths behind it too but we won’t go into that.

This page is brought to you by the good people at Fluid. Brand . Web . Strategy . Design . Marketing

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darling, ask me what colour and I’ll say pInk. I don’t know about you, but I’m frothing in anticipation for the arrival of gay ski week - the one week of the year that Queenstown paints itself pink and welcomes the rainbow brigade in a steady flow through the gorge and into its open orifices. but that’s all the bloody way at the end of the season! what my fellow fags and their hags will do until then is more baffling to me than the anatomy of the vajayjay. The pink pound is BIg. I’m talking bigger than Beyonce’s weave. Bigger than J-Lo’s ass. Honey, size matters and a gay’s gucci wallet is always fully stuffed. So why is there nowhere in Queenstown catering specifically to this enormous, lucrative market?

Queenstown is young, vibrant, fun orientated and image conscious - a few traits not so uncommon with the gay community. Surely Camp Street deserves a fashionable couturier? A pumping gay bar on Man Street? Shotover Street could host a multitude of possibilities almost too queer to contemplate...In a town built on consumerism and pure, unadulterated hedonism, Queenstown is missing out on a whole other market that has its foundations secured with the presence of gay Ski Week, but as yet is not catered for year round. Welcoming this market with opened jazz-hands is surely the next step in Queenstown’s world domination of the tourism market.

the Queen

more pInk In your pocket

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Here’s our take on your month ahead. If you’re

looking for spiritual guidance this is not the place...

STEAKNIGHT

horrorsCopELibra – Don’t be so humble - you are not that great.

Scorpio – It’s hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.

Sagittarius - This month you should be mostly eating turnips.

Capricorn – You sure have a great looking tooth.

Aquarius – Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

Pisces – So, tell me about your hair?

Aries – You can’t have everything - where would you put it?

Taurus – Time to put some prance in your dance.

gemini – never make eye contact while eating a banana.

Cancer – If it’s Saturday night you should nOT be reading this!

Leo – Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.

virgo – To make a long story short, don’t tell it.

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YourFaCE by: pieter seyffertp: 0210-252-4823e: seyffertpieter@yahoo.co.nz

Penny, Tia and a mate hanging out in the Gardens.A funny moment in the Queenstown Canyon with Ryoko from Japan.Bernard from South Africa with his Chinook Salmon caught at the Haast river.

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30ml Zumwohl plum 15ml white rum 15ml maraschino liqueur 15ml lemon Juice 15 ml passionfruit pulp 15 ml pink grapefruit Juice 1 fresh central otago plumAdd all ingredients to a boston glass, add ice, shake and double strain into a martini glass. for those who like it a bit sweeter add a teaspoon of manuka honey. And for those who want to rock the party cut a fresh passionfruit in half, add anything over 50% and set fire to it!

CoCKtaiL oF thE monthPLuM & PASSion DAiquiRi

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A F

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rhYmin’with Simon herbert

A flashing red star on a jet black night Gave the little green man quite a big frightThe clear blue sea seemed to turn brownAs his little orange spaceship spun round and round

His left eye went purple His right one went pinkBut all the green girls lovedHis multi coloured wink

The red flashing star turned all the trees mauveIt even changed the colour of all of his toesI hope no one sees me said the little green manI think it’s even changed the colour of my nose

His trousers went yellowHis space hat went silverHis hair turned to redAnd his ears began to quiver

Then all of a sudden he flipped upside downFlip Flop a Dop Flip Flop a Dop What shall I doSo he went to the toilet and had a multi coloured think

After his think he knew how to fix itSo he jumped in his little orange spaceshipThen he flew up and found the switch Of the red flashing star and flicked it

He turned the star offHe turned the star onBut now he was also covered in glitterAnd when he turned around heSuddenly realised he had a rainbow coloured bottom

But the red star still flashedAnd his colours are still mish mashedAnd in the end he decided Being Multi coloured is coolEspecially if you’re covered in glitter!

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wine colour – or “hue” as it can be referred to as – can actually tell you a fair bit about what the wine will taste like. And it can indicate what the wine may feel like in your mouth.Basically, wine hue is an indicator of wine age. The older the wine, the duller and darker the colour. So older white wines will be a deeper golden colour, and older red wines a burnt burgundy colour – and in fact both red and white wines will actually turn brown when they are really super old. Euww. I wouldn’t recommend drinking them then. Wine hue may also indicate the ‘weight’ of the wine – how heavy the wine feels

in your mouth. Younger wines (lighter in colour) are generally also lighter in weight (more akin to how water feels in your mouth) and older, darker wines can feel heavier – more like milk or light oil. So the lighter, brighter wines are the younger, lighter ones. And the duller, darker ones are the older, heavier ones. A bit like people really. Could be a good way to remember it!

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ROAsT VEGE PIZZA1/2 butternut pumpkin, (peeled & cubed); 1 red & 1 yellow capsicum (cut up); 1 red onion, sliced; 3 small zucchini, sliced; 2 tbs olive oil; 2 large pizza bases; 100ml sieved tomatoes; 120g feta, crumbled; 2 tsp balsamic vinegar;1/3 cup basil leavesMETHOD1. Preheat oven to 180°C. Toss veges in oil, season & roast for 10 mins. Remove zucchini & place in lge bowl. Roast rest of vege again until pumpkin is tender & capsicums are a little charred at edges. Add to zucchini & toss with balsamic. Set aside. 2. Increase oven temperature to 200°C. Spread tomatoes on bases & top with

veges, reserving any balsamic. Top with feta, bake for 15-20 minutes until feta is golden. Toss basil in reserved balsamic and scatter over pizzas to serve.

Kai timE

WinE timEtHe Colour of Wine

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Arrowtown’s always a lively place but come April when the hills and lanes are ablaze with autumn colour the annual Autumn festival really takes things to a higher level. A community celebration that takes in heritage and history as well as the best of the present, the festival is an important week in the local calendar as well as being a big driver of the Arrowtown economy.It’s just one example of how a well run event can bring huge benefits locally. Even the smallest event like a school fair sees people opening their wallets and spending for the good of the community, while the bigger ones like the Winter Festival draw in out of town visitors and garner national and sometimes even international coverage, a publicity bonus that’s worth hundreds of thousands of dollars.no surprises then that the Shaping Our Future district-wide brainstorming process has identified events as a priority issue for our community. A taskforce recently released a report containing a number of recommendations relating to events, chief amongst them the establishment of a District Events Office to help grow the number of events we host, and to also facilitate and ease the way for events that are currently held here.Council has included money for this

in the latest 10 year plan which was adopted earlier this month. There’s money for an events facilitator ($50,000) as well as the addition of $50,000 to the existing $50,000 fund where event organisers can apply to receive help with costs. The amounts are not huge in the wider scheme of things but there is potential to build the fund over the next five years.You can find out more about the recommendations relating to events funding in the 10 Year Plan which is available at all QLDC offices and libraries. There’s also a summary available online at www.qldc.govt.nz If you’re keen to do more background reading, the entire Events Task Force report can be viewed at www.shapingourfuture.org.nztake a look and see what you think. submissions on this and anything else in the 10 year plan are open now and close on monday 7 may.

thE C WorD

colour me eventful…

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Cochinealthe cochineal (dactylopius coccus) is a scale insect from which the crimson colour dye carmine is derived. A parasite native to tropical and subtropical south America and mexico, this insect lives on cacti, feeding on plant moisture and nutrients.The insect produces carminic acid that deters predation by other insects. Carminic acid, which occurs as 17-24% of the weight of the dry insects, can be extracted from the insect’s body and eggs and mixed with aluminium or calcium salts to make carmine dye (also known as cochineal). Carmine is today primarily used as a food colouring and for cosmetics.The carmine dye was used in Central America in the 15th century for colouring fabrics and became an important export product during the colonial period. After synthetic pigments and dyes such as alizarin were invented in the late 19th century, natural dye production gradually diminished. Health fears over artificial food additives, however, have renewed the popularity of cochineal dyes and the increased demand has made cultivation of the insect profitable again, with Peru being the largest exporter.

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Can’t BELiEVE You haVEn’t rEaD...

BLiNDNEssA mass epidemic of sight loss sweeps an unidentified city, causing a break down in society, civilisation and everyday function. the book’s main characters band together, forming a family unit, comprised of a doctor and his wife and his patients. the wife has somehow been spared from the epidemic and helps the unit function. they are placed in an asylum where the infected are being contained, which eventually deteriorates to filth due to everyone’s lack of sight.the family unit escapes and attempts to build a new life in the outside world, with harrowing sights seen through the eyes of the sighted wife. Jose saramago is a master story teller and this book is one of his best.

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SUN 24 JUNE - QUEENSTOWN EVENTS CENTRETICKETS FROM TICKETEK.CO.NZFLIGHTOFTHECONCHORDS.CO.NZ

TEC, BEE AND THE EDGE PRESENT

FLIGHTOF THECONCHORDS

YEAR of thE DRAgoNAnyone else noticed the influx of chinese to town in recent months? one thing’s for certain, the impact of Auckland Airport’s well documented and controversial investment in Queenstown Airport has opened the floodgates to this new market.hell, in light of christchurch Airport’s decreased arrivals it might even save our bacon in a depressed economic environment.these aren’t the cheap chinese package tours Queenstown’s experienced in the past. they’re more like the affluent, brand conscious and high-yielding

Japanese visitors we used to get in solid numbers years ago. Well groomed, immaculately presented and cashed up. cultural awareness is key to cashing in on the yellow dollar. We’ve a big education process ahead of us if we want to share in the pot of gold. What are the important chinese customs we need to know and understand? how many Mandarin speaking staff will we need? What do our new chinese visitors want to purchase in our shops – more Prada than Patagonia i’m picking.so with the pipeline open the pressure is on people.

BLurt

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iMPREssiVE LiNE UP foR sEcoND QUEENstoWN BiKE fEstiVALthe 2012 Queenstown bike festival (march 30-April 9) is opening next week with more than 20 events in its line up. the programme offers competition and social events involving all things about the bike, rolled into an exciting package for adults, children, recreational and elite riders and the general public.the ten day festival starts with Auckland comedian Joseph harper rendering his acclaimed show “Bikes i’ve owned Versus girls i’ve fallen in Love With” combined with the “Made in New Zealand with Love” bike awards at the crowne Plaza on friday March 30.the speights summit super

D Enduro, a mountain bike endurance event for teams and individuals, will follow on saturday March 31. this event takes full advantage of what the skyline gondola and Queenstown Bike Park have to offer and has attracted more than 80% of its field from outside the region, with cantabrians and Wellingtonians featuring in high numbers.sunday April 1 is the children’s day with the Kids Mini cross mountain bike competition in Butlers green and surrounds in Arrowtown. this is a community based event, encouraging kids between the ages of 5 to 14 years old of all sporting abilities to take part.With a bike to win, a bouncy castle, sausage sizzle and more, the event provides opportunities for youngsters to learn all there is to know about the bike, with olympian biker Kashi Leuchs on hand giving tips and advice for budding elite bikers.for the adults, entertainment will be plentiful in the evening

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with the Word Bar 16inch World championship, where riders will get to navigate a tricky course amongst tables, chairs, pillars and other obstacles on a 16inch bike.the week following offers social rides, night rides, movie nights and even a mountain bike film competition, “through the Lens”, presented by Down2Ride and whose proceeds will go to the Queenstown Mountain Bike club to assist in trail building, advocacy and maintenance.on April 5, the teva slopestyle will be held for the first time and is one of the most exciting bike festival events for the public to watch and enjoy in downtown Queenstown.Located in the Ballarat street car park, freeriders lured by the impressive $10,000 prize money purse will use the massive jumps and drops to wow the twilight crowd with tricks such as flatspins, can-cans, flips and supermans, while literally challenging the laws of gravity.

on saturday April 7, the fourth New World tour de Wakatipu will provide once again the only opportunity of the year for people to have access through coneburn station along the Kawarau River.the event which caters for elite, sport and recreational mountain bikers starts at Millbrook Resort and follows tracks across public and private land to finish at chard farm.Lastly but not least, the Dirtmasters Downhill on sunday April 8 will provide spectacular action in the Queenstown Bike Park and downtown Queenstown.competitors ride the skyline gondola to the top of the 3km course which utilises a combination of established tracks, and finishes in the heart of town, in the final pitch down the Brecon street stairs.

Information on the Queenstown bike festival, its full programme and events online entries are available on the web site www.queenstownbikefestival.com

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SAt 31 MARWoRLD BAR :: CDJ2000s spin with Stubacca from 9pm. ReD RoCk :: Live music from 7pm. Pog MAhone’S :: Live music with Charlie Gibson from 9.30pm. Pig & WhiStLe :: Live music with the Hamiltones from 8.30pm. BunkeR :: DJ J-San, House Retro fusion. MontY’S :: Courtyard Session at 6pm. Lone StAR :: Rock Night from 10.30pm. SkYCitY CASino :: Neil Chilton, 9.30pm. R20.

Sun 1 APRWoRLD BAR :: League of Gentlemen & World Bar present 16” World Championships. ReD RoCk :: Calico at 4pm. MontY’S :: The Night Watchmen at 6pm. Lone StAR :: Welcoming all Dirtmasters competitors.

Mon 2 APRWoRLD BAR :: Live music with Mojo 10pm. ReD RoCk :: Pub Poker 6.30pm, $100 cash prize.

tue 3 APRWoRLD BAR :: Through The Lens local mountain bike film screening at 8pm. Lone StAR :: Free poker with Cardsharks, $100 bar tab to be won, 9pm.

WeD 4 APRWoRLD BAR :: Shay & Pearly acoustic 9pm. Pog MAhone’S :: Quiz from 7pm. Lone StAR :: Live music with the Hoonz 9pm.

thu 5 APRWoRLD BAR :: Epic DJs 9.30pm to 4am. Pog MAhone’S :: Live music from 9pm. Pig & WhiStLe :: Calico at 8.30pm. BunkeR :: New local DJs. MontY’S :: The Night Watchmen at 9pm.

FRi 6 APRWoRLD BAR :: Closed Easter Friday, open at midnight. Pog MAhone’S :: Good Friday, only open to diners. Pig & WhiStLe :: Good Friday, only open to diners. BunkeR :: Tim Sargeant, sexy house sesh. Lone StAR :: Super Rugby and DJ Just Cause after 10pm.

SAt 7 APR WoRLD BAR :: Epic DJs on CDJ2000s from 9.30pm to 4am. ReD RoCk :: The Federation Blues Band live from 2pm. Pog MAhone’S :: Charlie Gibson live 8pm. Pig & WhiStLe :: Live music with the Mutz Nutz at 8.30pm. BunkeR :: DJ J-San, House Retro fusion. MontY’S :: Courtyard Session DJ. Lone StAR :: Rock Night with DJ Wulf at 10pm. Qualification Round. SkYCitY CASino :: Hey You, 9.30pm. R20.

Sun 8 APRWoRLD BAR :: Closed for Easter. ReD RoCk :: Ghettoblaster live at 4pm. Pog MAhone’S :: Easter Sunday, only open to diners. Pig & WhiStLe :: Live music with Robin Tripp 3pm. Lone StAR :: Final race 2-4pm with DJ Just Cause and Mr Feet at 9pm. SkYCitY CASino :: Neil Chilton, 9pm. R20.

Mon 9 APRWoRLD BAR :: Live music with Mojo 10pm. ReD RoCk :: Pub Poker 6.30pm, $100 cash prize.

tue 10 APRWoRLD BAR :: $1000 bar tab at 11pm, check our Facebook page for the password. Lone StAR :: Free poker with Cardsharks, $100 bar tab to be won, 9pm.

gigguiDE

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Call Reuben 021 955 260 Or call Tom 021 838 143

WeD 11 APRWoRLD BAR :: Shay & Pearly acoustic 8pm. Pog MAhone’S :: Quiz from 7pm.

thu 12 APRWoRLD BAR :: Epic DJs from 9.30pm to 4am. Pog MAhone’S :: Music from 9pm. BunkeR :: New local DJs. MontY’S :: Chas N Dave at 9pm.

FRi 13 APRWoRLD BAR :: $1000 bar tab at 11pm. Check out the password on Facebook. Pog MAhone’S :: Live music at 9pm. Pig & WhiStLe :: Ham Solo at 9pm. BunkeR :: Tim Sargeant, sexy house sesh. MontY’S :: Live music with Nick from 9pm. Lone StAR :: Super Rugby and DJ Just Cause after 10pm. SkYCitY CASino :: Harry and Saelyn, 9.30pm. R20.

SAt 14 APR WoRLD BAR :: Rhythmonyx 8 peice HipHop/Dub/Funk/DnB crew from the south. Free. ReD RoCk :: Live DJs from 9pm. Pog MAhone’S :: Charlie Gibson live at 9.30pm. Pig & WhiStLe :: Live music with Eamonn & Pol 8.30pm. BunkeR :: DJ J-San, House Retro fusion. MontY’S :: DJ and The Mutz Nutz 3pm and 9pm. Lone StAR :: Rock Night with DJ Wulf at 10pm. SkYCitY CASino :: Brett Strachan, 9.30pm. R20.

Sun 15 APRWoRLD BAR :: Buy a beer BBQ from 6pm with good tunes. ReD RoCk :: Charlie & Dave live at 4pm. MontY’S :: The Night Watchmen at 5pm.

Mon 16 APRWoRLD BAR :: Live music with Mojo 10pm. ReD RoCk :: Pub Poker 6.30pm, $100 cash prize.

tue 17 APRWoRLD BAR :: $1000 bar tab at 11pm. Check out Facebook for the password. Lone StAR :: Free poker with Cardsharks, $100 bar tab to be won, 9pm.

WeD 18 APRWoRLD BAR :: Shay & Pearly acoustic 9pm. Pog MAhone’S :: Quiz from 7pm.

thu 19 APRWoRLD BAR :: Epic DJs from 9.30pm to 4am. Pog MAhone’S :: Music from 9pm. BunkeR :: New local DJs. MontY’S :: The Night Watchmen at 9pm.

FRi 20 APRWoRLD BAR :: $1000 bar tab at 11pm. Check out the password on Facebook. Pog MAhone’S :: Live music from 9pm. Pig & WhiStLe :: Live music with The Mutz Nutz 8.30pm. BunkeR :: Tim Sargeant, sexy house sesh. MontY’S :: Ham Solo at 9pm. Lone StAR :: Super Rugby and DJ Just Cause after 10pm. SkYCitY CASino :: LA Social Club, 9.30pm. R20

SAt 21 APRWoRLD BAR :: Live DJ epicness every night from 9.30pm. ReD RoCk :: Live DJs from 9pm. Pog MAhone’S :: Live music with Charlie Gibson from 9.30pm. Pig & WhiStLe :: Live music with The Hoonz 8.30pm. BunkeR :: DJ J-San, House Retro fusion. MontY’S :: Courtyard Session DJ.

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Lone StAR :: Rock Night with DJ Wulf at 10pm. SkYCitY CASino :: Brett Strachan, 9.30pm. R20.

Sun 22 APRWoRLD BAR :: Buy a beer BBQ from 6pm with great music. ReD RoCk :: Dave Arnold live at 4pm. Pog MAhone’S :: Live music. MontY’S :: Nick at 6pm.

Mon 23 APRWoRLD BAR :: Live music with Mojo 10pm. ReD RoCk :: Pub Poker 6.30pm, $100 cash prize. Pig & WhiStLe :: Come and celebrate St George’s Day!

tue 24 APRWoRLD BAR :: $1000 bar tab at 11pm, check out the password on Facebook. Lone StAR :: Free poker with Cardsharks, $100 bar tab to be won, 9pm.

WeD 25 APRWoRLD BAR :: Shay & Pearly acoustic 9pm. Pog MAhone’S :: Quiz from 7pm.

thu 26 APRWoRLD BAR :: Live DJs from 9.30pm to 4am. Pog MAhone’S :: Music from 9pm. BunkeR :: New local DJs. MontY’S :: The Mutz Nutz at 9pm.

FRi 27 APRWoRLD BAR :: $1000 bar tab at 11pm. Check out the password on Facebook. Pog MAhone’S :: Live music from 9pm. Pig & WhiStLe :: Live music with Shay & Pearly from 8.30pm. BunkeR :: Tim Sargeant, sexy house sesh. Lone StAR :: Super Rugby and DJ Just Cause after 10pm. SkYCitY CASino :: Groova, 9.30pm. R20

SAt 28 APR WoRLD BAR :: CDJ2000s spin with Stubacca from 9pm. ReD RoCk :: Live DJs from 9pm. Pog MAhone’S :: Charlie Gibson live at 9.30pm. Pig & WhiStLe :: Live music with Eamonn & Pol 8.30pm. BunkeR :: DJ J-San, House Retro fusion. MontY’S :: Courtyard Session DJ. Lone StAR :: Mad Hatter Staff Tea Party, wear your best hat! With Mr Feet at 10pm. SkYCitY CASino :: Brett Strachan, 9.30pm. R20.

Sun 29 APRWoRLD BAR :: Buy a beer BBQ from 6pm with great tunes. ReD RoCk :: Tahnz live at 4pm. MontY’S :: The Night Watchmen at 6pm.

Mon 30 APRWoRLD BAR :: Live music with Mojo 10pm. ReD RoCk :: Pub Poker 6.30pm, $100 cash prize.

gigguiDE

nEXt MOnth: As yOu’vE pRObAbly REAlisED by nOw, thE sOuRcE Runs with A thEME EAch MOnth. wEll wE thOught MAybE yOu’D likE tO knOw whAt’s cOMing up nEXt sO yOu cAn jOin in thE Fun. wE’RE AlwAys kEEn tO hEAR FROM ARtists, wRitERs, phOtOgRAphERs, Djs

AnD gEnERAl wEiRDOs - EspEciAlly iF yOu’vE gOt sOMEthing yOu wAnt us tO publish OR EvEn iF yOu just wAnt tO hAvE A RAnt...

nEXt MOnth’s issuE is cAllED ”hOME”iF yOu’D likE tO cOntRibutE EMAil us:

inFO@thEsOuRcEOnlinE.cOM

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who, what, where? Lone starPo caféBella cucinaPog MahonesfinzPig & WhistleWaiRed RockWhisky RoomBath housethe World Barthe BunkerMonty’sAtlasskycity casinoskyline

PolicePost officeMedical centreBus stopQt gardensMemorial hall

Want to increase your strength and flexibility?Try Ashtanga Yoga

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Class concession cards availableAll levels welcome Check website for timetable & updates

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I am not a colourblind person; I am a person with colourblindness. we emphasise the fact that we are humans so the colour-capable (or “rainbow humpers”) treat us with the same respect they would give to a non-colourblind guy who accidentally bought a pink bicycle. the point is, you jerks are too busy discriminating against us with your traffic lights and generic-brand pregnancy tests to realise just how tough it is to live in a world where every crayon could possibly be that gross baby-poo brown one…sPORT• Contrary to everything I ever

believed, I just realised that All Black Adam Thompson is actually white.

• I assumed a roundhouse kick to the groin only drew a yellow card.

• While being mauled by an angry alpha-male sea lion I came to realise it was just a drunk Green Bay Packers fan giving me a hug.

MusIc• Michael Jackson never confused

me.• For years I thought I was listening

to Purple Rain when I was actually listening to Pink.

• I always want to hit myself in the face with a hammer when I hear “Yellow” by Coldplay and I’ve spent my whole life believing that I was the only one.

• Cash moves everything around me, beige get the money, dolla dolla bill, y’all.

MOVIEs• I totally misinterpreted The Matrix

thinking that the movie chronicled the mundane life of blissful ignorance that Nero chose to live by swallowing the blue pill.

• When watching Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory I can only assume that Violet Beauregarde experiences horrifying skin pigment discolouration because of her dangerous levels of glucosamine.

• I’m unable to get emotionally moved by the scene in Bio Dome where Squirrel and Stubbs wake up after their raging slosh-fest to find that all of the greenery has died and homeostasis has dropped to 15%.

LEIsuRE• I have accidentally slapped my own

sunburn.• I still haven’t found Red Rock.• I often give purple nurples when I

only intend to give a regular nurple.• I frequently accuse Professor

Plum of murdering me with the candlestick in the conservatory when in reality it was Miss Peacock.

• All these years I thought I was drinking Red Stripe when I was actually drinking Pabst Blue Ribbon.

Adam Saraceno gray with Envy

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Come and try our new Mexican menufresh quesadillas, nachos, burritos, chimichangas, dips

Frozen margaritasMega-jugs

Happy Hour 4pm-5pm

Buy any product - food or beverage - and go in the draw to win the add ons to your season pass: First Tracks or Night Skiing.

:: STILL HOME OF THE FAMOUS TEN DOLLAR BREAKFAST ::Local DJs through the week . live bands . garden bar .

Corner of Camp Street + Man Street, Queenstown

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Get 20g of tobacco and your coals.Ask at the bar for flavours available.