Supporting the Emotional Supporting the Emotional Needs of your Gifted ChildNeeds of your Gifted Child

Dea Rivera, School Counselor, Dea Rivera, School Counselor, LMFTLMFT

Charles Blackstock Jr. HighCharles Blackstock Jr. High

Parenting a gifted child is like living in a theme park full of thrill rides

““Sometimes you smile.  Sometimes you gasp.  Sometimes you scream.  Sometimes you smile.  Sometimes you gasp.  Sometimes you scream. 

Sometimes you laugh.  Sometimes you gaze in wonder and Sometimes you laugh.  Sometimes you gaze in wonder and astonishment.  Sometimes you're frozen in your seat.  Sometimes you're astonishment.  Sometimes you're frozen in your seat.  Sometimes you're

proud.  And sometimes, the ride is so nerve-wracking, you can't do proud.  And sometimes, the ride is so nerve-wracking, you can't do anything but cry."anything but cry."

Stress Study QuestionStress Study Question Within the last year of your life who has…Within the last year of your life who has…

a) Experienced relatively low stress?a) Experienced relatively low stress?

b) Experienced light to moderate stress?b) Experienced light to moderate stress?

c) Experienced high levels of stress?c) Experienced high levels of stress?

Stress Protectors?Stress Protectors?

Some characteristics common among gifted Some characteristics common among gifted students have also been cited as protective students have also been cited as protective factors factors

High intelligenceHigh intelligence Problem-solving abilitiesProblem-solving abilities Advanced social skillsAdvanced social skills Advanced moral reasoningAdvanced moral reasoning

Stress StudyStress Study

Do you believe that stress is harmful to Do you believe that stress is harmful to your health?your health?

Yes Yes NoNo

When you change your mind about stress, When you change your mind about stress,

you change your reaction to stress. you change your reaction to stress.

Your Response to Stress is Your Response to Stress is HelpfulHelpful - - PositivePositive

Your body is actively preparing you for action- Your body is actively preparing you for action- to meet the challenge that lies aheadto meet the challenge that lies ahead

• Pounding heartPounding heart• Breathing fasterBreathing faster• AdrenalineAdrenaline• Oxytocin (cuddle hormone)Oxytocin (cuddle hormone)

Stress Makes us social! Stress Makes us social!

Dabrowski’s TheoryDabrowski’s Theory

Gifted are more likely to have a heightened Gifted are more likely to have a heightened response to stimuli- heightened intensities response to stimuli- heightened intensities The responses exceed what you would typically The responses exceed what you would typically expectexpectOverexcitabilitiesOverexcitabilities

PsychomotorPsychomotor SensualSensual IntellectualIntellectual ImaginationalImaginational EmotionalEmotional

Psychomotor OverexcitabilityPsychomotor Overexcitability

Love movement & show a surplus of energy Love movement & show a surplus of energy

Can Look like…Can Look like…

Rapid speechRapid speech

SleeplessnessSleeplessness

Impulsive behavior Impulsive behavior

Nervous habits Nervous habits

Intense drive Intense drive

Compulsive organizationCompulsive organization

What to do…What to do…

Sensual OverexcitabilitySensual Overexcitability Pleasure in sensory & aesthetic experiencesPleasure in sensory & aesthetic experiences Displeasure in sensory experiences- sensory Displeasure in sensory experiences- sensory

overloadoverload

Can look like..Can look like.. Appreciative of beautyAppreciative of beauty Sensitive to sights, sounds, touch, smells & tastesSensitive to sights, sounds, touch, smells & tastes Texture of food, hum of lights, tags in clothesTexture of food, hum of lights, tags in clothes Need or desire for comfortNeed or desire for comfort Easily distractedEasily distracted Need to be center of Need to be center of attention or withdraw attention or withdraw from stimulationfrom stimulationWhat to do…What to do…

Intellectual OverexcitabilityIntellectual Overexcitability Deep CuriosityDeep Curiosity Higher level of thinkingHigher level of thinking

Can look like…Can look like… Love of problem solvingLove of problem solving Asks many questionAsks many question Active mindActive mind Fairness and justice are very importantFairness and justice are very important Avid readingAvid reading Keen observationKeen observation Prolonged ability to concentrateProlonged ability to concentrate May seem critical and impatient (too honest)May seem critical and impatient (too honest) Moral thinking, metacognition, theory, analyticalMoral thinking, metacognition, theory, analyticalWhat to do…What to do…

Imaginational OverexcitabilityImaginational Overexcitability Fantasizes and used imagery and metaphorFantasizes and used imagery and metaphor SpontaneousSpontaneous Can look like…Can look like…

DaydreamingDaydreaming Thinking in picturesThinking in pictures Remembering dreamsRemembering dreams Good sense of humorGood sense of humor Mixes truth with fictionMixes truth with fiction Love of poetry, drama, musicLove of poetry, drama, music Fear Fear ofof thethe unknownunknown What to do…What to do…

Emotional OverexcitabilityEmotional Overexcitability

Intense feelings, sensitive and empathetic Intense feelings, sensitive and empathetic Looks like…Looks like…

Capacity for deep relationships/attachmentsCapacity for deep relationships/attachmentsCompassionate and caringCompassionate and caringAnxiety, feelings of guilt- extreme emotionsAnxiety, feelings of guilt- extreme emotionsCan experience loneliness and depressionCan experience loneliness and depressionProblems adjusting to changeProblems adjusting to changeSomatic symptomsSomatic symptomsHighly self criticalHighly self critical

What to doWhat to do……

Academics become more Academics become more challenging and stress challenging and stress

increasesincreases

Perfectionistic tendenciesPerfectionistic tendencies Peer relationsPeer relations Shift in behavior or moodShift in behavior or mood Social isolationSocial isolation

Recommendations Recommendations Discuss positives related to sensitivitiesDiscuss positives related to sensitivities Support path of passion (well-rounded)Support path of passion (well-rounded) Teach skills to cope with overloadTeach skills to cope with overload Encourage healthy friendships (monitor)Encourage healthy friendships (monitor) Make time to talk & listen to your childMake time to talk & listen to your child Maintain boundaries on screen timeMaintain boundaries on screen time Praise efforts, not just successesPraise efforts, not just successes Help set prioritiesHelp set priorities Seek help of experts when necessarySeek help of experts when necessary Exercise, eat well and relaxExercise, eat well and relax

ResourcesResources