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CROSSFIT MONCTON May 2016

Training to Survive the Zombie ApocalypsePeople love to talk about the apocalypse. Maybe it's a useful way to sort out the important issues, the non-starters and non sequiturs. Perhaps it helps them to think critically and objectively. Some even go so far as to say they are “training for the apocalypse." They say it as something between a half-hearted joke and full-bore paranoia. For the purpose of determining how functional and transferable your fitness is, we are going to use the proverbial zombie apocalypse, despite its glorification and unlikeliness. Besides, both the CDC and the Department of Defense have used the apocalypse to evaluate their preparedness and structure, so I think it's fair to run hypotheticals using it as well. So how do you train for the apocalypse? It may shock you to find out that after all the years and copious hours you've spent trying to attain the most impressive 1-rep max numbers known to mankind, you're no more fit for survival than you were when you started.

Your Big Bench Press Won't Save You

Let's start big and kill this notion first: "Being stronger makes you harder to kill." No, it does not. A person with a 300lb deadlift and another person with an 800lb deadlift both encounter the same mortality when a 7.62mm round from a high-velocity rifle canoes their heads. If strength truly made you harder to kill, our military elite would train exclusively at Westside Barbell (they don’t). Most people would agree, if caught in an epic, end-of-the world, Mad Max, zombie-eating-faces scenario, they would appreciate help from some hard-hitting CAG operator, Navy Seal, or SAS, and

that having them around would increase the chance of survival. When looking for optimal models of survivability, few could surpass elite military operators.

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Elite units recognize the importance of strength training, especially in context of strength-endurance. But they all recognize a far more important physical ability when they have to load an 80lb rucksack and trek for twelve hours before engaging with a target. That ability is efficiency. A large majority of military training is spent making soldiers efficient. They run, ruck, swim, and do hours of calisthenics on very little food and even less rest. The training environment allows soldiers to adapt, so they are ready when “being harder to kill” really matters.

At no time during selection of the world’s most elite fighting forces do they suit up a double ply, belt, and wraps and test who has the highest 1RM back squat. I’m not trying to demonize strength training. A basic level of strength is required for most endurance activities. I also believe that chasing large 1-rep maxes outside of specific sport preparation is a lousy definition of functional strength training. Even on the rare occasion that maximal strength becomes relevant in the real world, you're unlikely to encounter a handy 28mm knurled diameter that works perfectly for your grip. In this respect, I commend those who know their own ability when it comes to farmer’s carries or fat bar deadlifts. At least these lifts serve a function, even if they are still contrived and artificial.

Stop Eating Everything

At some point early on in our hypothetical zombie outbreak, the need to eat will arise. If you take your nutritional advice from the experts of Instagram, you're probably not going to make it. A common trend among athletes is to

consume more and more calories in order to get lean. This is the exact opposite of efficiency. Consuming food in abundance to fuel specific efforts may improve top-end performance, but it also makes our bodies expensive metabolically. All the time you spent “stoking the engine” and “feeding the machine” will have turned you into a pathetic waste when it comes to survival. You have all but turned off your body’s ability to conserve energy, and in doing so reduced the amount of work you can do without fuel. Survival is dependent on limiting exposure to nature, finding water and food sources, and rationing that source for as long as possible. Survival is rarely about confrontation with an opponent. That illusion is only true if you realize the opponent is yourself. In this respect, survival and training for physical fitness are the same. Get Small, Go Far

Endurance is key to surviving the apocalypse. Being able to travel far, fast, and on little fuel could be the difference between making it out of a crowded cannibalistic city and watching your stomach skin get turned into a lampshade by a depraved, diseased roommate.

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If your goal is to be harder to kill, you should weigh less, consume less, and try your hardest to remember that splint wrap technique from your sophomore sports medicine class. It shouldn’t surprise anyone that the average male special operations somatotype is around 185lb. If you need more convincing, consider this: the strongest humans are usually some of the biggest, which means they require the most food and the most time to move. A slower target is an easier target. Bigger people are also an inconvenience when they are injured. It seems really cool to be the “big guy” until you twist your ankle and the group responsible for carrying you starts debating on how important you really are. Should they use a crockpot or an open spit to roast your well-developed glutes?

Survival Is Not a 6-Minute AMRAP

Someone will no doubt throw out, “CrossFit trains you for the unknown and unknowable!” I have no problem with this idea, except that I’m pretty sure our species never survived the past 200,000 years because of their ability to do butterfly pull ups. Survival efforts are sometimes longer than eleven minutes, which is the length of an average CrossFit workout. You can probably count on one hand the number of times the CrossFit main site has prescribed efforts over ninety minutes in the past decade. If the unknown is a 50km trek with weight, the average CrossFitter might have hedged their bets incorrectly on overhead weighted pistols.

The Slowest One Gets Eaten

The biggest question to answer in determining your chances of surviving the zombie apocalypse is this: How much of your training is actually functional, and how much of it is a joke? This is not a defence of “cardio bunnies,” nor an op-ed to bash strength training. What it might be is a fantastical look at the most basic human movement: the ability to run far, fast, and efficiently. When you consider the functional aspects of training that are also major constituents to survival, it becomes obvious that running is one of the biggest. No other human ability enables you to escape the terrifying attacks of deranged mega fauna. So next time your friend or gym partner complains that running hurts their knees and they are opting for the elliptical or a Venice Beach-style workout, you can smile and know there will be one more piece of human fodder that can be put between you the approaching zombie horde. You don’t have to be the fastest, but you sure as shit can’t be the slowest. via Breaking Muscle

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INGREDIENTS

For the Picadillo

1 pound ground beef, preferably grass-fed

2 Tablespoons tallow, lard, or coconut oil

1 medium onion, about 1.5 cups diced small

1 large green bell pepper, about 1.5 cups diced

½ teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon black pepper, freshly ground

1 teaspoon ground cumin

½ teaspoon ground cinnamon

1 14 oz can whole tomatoes

¼ cup currants

2 Tablespoons green olives with pimiento, diced

2 Tablespoons drained capers

2 Tablespoons olive brine (or white wine vinegar and salt to taste)

For the Pico de Gallo

⅓ cup minced shallot or red onion

⅔ cup diced tomatoes

2 Tablespoons minced cilantro

2 teaspoons fresh lime juice

salt to taste

To Serve

Lettuce leaves or cabbage leaves

Cooked brown or white rice (optional)

Chopped cilantro (optional)

Directions:

Heat large skillet or Dutch oven over medium heat. Add beef. Crumble and stir occasionally as it cooks. Remove and set aside.Add tallow or oil to pan. Add onions and cook until beginning to soften, about 3-4 minutes. Add bell pepper and cook 3 more minutes. Stir in garlic, then add the salt, black pepper, cumin, and cinnamon and stir for 30 seconds, until fragrant.Add cooked beef, canned tomatoes, currants, diced olives, capers, and olive brine. Break up the tomatoes into small pieces while the mixture comes to a boil.Reduce heat to low, cover, and simmer for 10-20 minutes.Meanwhile, prepare the pico de gallo. Combine minced shallot, chopped tomatoes, minced cilantro, lime juice, and a dash of salt, then set aside.To serve, fill each lettuce leaf with the beef mixture, a spoonful of rice (if desired), and a spoonful of pico de gallo or cilantro.

via The Nourishing Gourmet

CUBAN PICADILLO WRAPS

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ATHLETE PROFILE When did you join CFM? Had you been involved in other gyms or fitness programs before?

I joined CFM in May 2014 right after completing the prep class. I had tried just about everything before finding CrossFit...I had been a member at my university gym, tried a boxing gym and then did the whole Goodlife thing for a bit.

Do you have an athletic background?

Sports have always been a huge part of my life… In high school I played varsity level hockey, soccer, track&field, and rugby. Growing up I would play anything my parents let me, but whenever it was time to pick or prioritize - hockey won. In high school I couldn’t chose between my women’s hockey team or continuing to play with the guys like I did my whole life, so I did both…there were times that I would hurry out after a women’s game still in full gear & skate guards and hop in the car for my mom to drive me to another rink to make it for my other game (my mom is pretty awesome)!

What made you decide to join CFM?

I had been living in Moncton for a few months, trying to stick with the whole Goodlife thing and I just got fed up…I wasn’t seeing results, I felt terrible and was at the point where I would leave more upset than when I arrived …so I wanted to find something that would hold me accountable, change my attitude and give me the chance to meet some people. I looked up all the CrossFit gyms in the area and CFM had a prep class starting the soonest, so I emailed Kevin and that was that…and I couldn’t be more thankful it worked out that way!

What are your fitness or skill goals? Have you accomplished any of them?

I think my original goal was to look & feel better…and it certainly didn’t happen overnight but I can’t believe how much things have changed! Goal setting here is endless and I love that… I constantly have short & long term goals that I’m chasing in the gym. I’ve definitely accomplished some already but as soon as that happens, there’s a new one to work towards and that’s what I love. Right now I’m working towards a bodyweight snatch, a 200# clean (so close!) and to complete the Spartan Trifecta this summer!

CARA KYLE

Stats

CrossFitting since 2014Deadlift: 250#Press: 110#Grace: 3:06 RxC&J: 165#500m row: 1:41.7Snatch: 135#

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Do you remember your first workout?

I do! It was the day that Blake did 1000 BURPEES!!!!! Haha, that was insane to walk in on that for my first official class… but the wod that day was a nice ice breaker for a first class, it was 10-9-8…3-2-1 med ball situps, med ball cleans *5 burpees after each round – I remember feeling pretty good about this!

Which of the 10 components of fitness have you found to be the most challenging? In which ones have you seen the most improvement? I think the most challenging (especially in the beginning) have been flexibility & stamina…and both are still a work in progress. I spent a lot of time red-lining in WODs my first summer but it took time to learn proper pacing for myself. I’ve seen the most improvement in strength & power I think…specif ical ly upper body strength – I had basically none of that when I started!

Describe the atmosphere at CFM.

There is no single word to describe the atmosphere that has been created at CFM…it’s welcoming, loving, encouraging, empowering…it’s my happiest and safest place! It’s where all the other stresses and worries in life can be put on hold & you can just focus on making yourself a little bit better each time you're there.

Give us a few words of advice for someone in their first month of CrossFit. Don’t worry about what anyone else is doing – worry about what you’re doing and the progress you’re making. There will be both baby steps and giant leaps along the way but the only person you’re ever up against is yourself!

What would you tell someone who is hesitant to try CrossFit? Put your reservations aside long enough to see what it’s actually all about, it’s really easy to judge anything from the outside…but it’s SO much better to come on in and enjoy it with us!

What is your best (and worst) WOD memory? My best WOD memory right now is from this year’s open - 16.3. I was so nervous and it’s the most I’ve ever surprised myself with what I was able to do, I surpassed my expectation by so much and couldn’t stop smiling with every bar MU…and thank you again Shane for standing there the whole time telling me I could keep going!

First day = Blake doing 1000 burpees… WHAT?!?

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My worst was actually in the open the year before – 15.4. I spent 8 mins trying to do HSPU and I got 2…I underestimated how hard it was going to be..I got so upset and disappointed with myself and then I cried haha and that memory has haunted me for over a year now! It’s actually probably time I try it again because it also motivated me to put more work towards HSPU.

Do you have any CrossFit competition experience? Tell us about it!

Yes! I’ve now done 4 competitions and have nothing but amazing things to say about them! I did Spring Fling ’15 & ’16, The Hopper, & the DTown Throwdown – which is a pretty cool line up because I’ve got to experience competing with a partner, on my own, and as a team. I have had so much fun at all of these events. I was completely terrified for my first one but you quickly realize that anything you were worried about is essentially a non-issue. You just get to work out in an electric environment and have people cheer you on, no one cares what division you’re in or what your skill level is – it’s a ton of fun and anyone there is just pumped that you decided to participate! I’ve also had the chance to do 3 Olympic weightlifting meets and that has been a game changer for me! Putting the extra focus here has helped out in CrossFit more than I could have imagined and these are also so much fun!

What is your favourite lift? Favourite WOD (or type of WOD)?

If it’s a good snatch day, then that’s my fav! Haha but really I love both Olympic lifts and ALL of the Squats! My favourite wods are for time (aka not AMRAPs); I really like chippers (preferably the fast ones) and pretty much anything heavy EXCEPT deadlifts. My distaste for those can’t even be explained.

What would you say is the greatest benefit you've received from joining, (not including fitness?)

FRIENDSHIP! So. Many. Incredible. People. We really are a great big family! Any other comments?

I’m just about to hit my 2 year anniversary and I can’t possibly express my gratitude for what this gym has given me. I love you all and you’ve all been such an amazing addition to my life! Thank you all for being a part of it & the BIGGEST thank you to Kevin & Jo for making what we do possible and for being truly amazing humans.

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THIS MONTH AT CFM!

May 4

May 7, 2pm

May 13

May 28

Master The Rope Climb

Mascara & Muscles for Crossroads

Poker Night! (Sign up on the whiteboard)

Hopewell Rocks 8k Multi Terrain Race (Sign Up or Come

Cheer on Kevin & Blake!)

EXCITING NEWS!

Advanced Health & Physiotherapy is a proud new sponsor of CrossFit Moncton. Their

goal is to prevent injuries and keep our members safe and healthy during their training

both in and out of the gym. Julie and her team have a lot of experience treating

CrossFitters, so we will be in good hands.

I’m happy to renew our partnership with Advanced Health once again!

~Kevin

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Running, Jumping, Pulling April!

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Interested in joining? Come for a FREE No-Sweat Intro. Leave your money at home. We don’t want to sell you anything; we just want to talk about your goals and see if we can help.

Book your FREE consultation at:

http://meetme.so/kevinwood

or email: info@crossfitmoncton.com

CROSSFIT MONCTON

359 Baig Blvd. Moncton, NB