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HBR  MANAGEMENT  TIPS      EFFECTIVE  COMMUNICATION  

   Build  a  Climate  of  Trust  Humans   “read”   body   language   and   facial   expressions   to   discern   if   others   are   trustworthy,   but  some  situations  –  like  change  or  confusion  –  prime  us  for  distrust.  In  the  absence  of  information,  the  brain  works  overtime.  After  all,  we’re  programmed  to  anticipate  harm  and  protect  ourselves  from   it.   But   even   when   your   team   lacks   clarity   on   a   situation,   you   can   still   build   a   trusting  environment.  Think  about  a  time  when  your  boss  and  a  colleague  starting  meeting  regularly  and  you   didn’t   know   why.   You   probably   started   wondering   if   you’d   been   left   out   of   an   important  project.  Leaders  can  shift  people’s  thoughts  away  from  threats  by  fostering  an  open,  transparent  environment   in   which   everyone   shares   and   discusses   as   much   as   they   can   about   what’s   really  going  on.  This  sends  a  strong  signal  to  everyone’s  lower  brain  that  “trust  is  in  the  air.”      Adapted  from  “How  to  Dispel  Distrust  at  Work,”  by  Judith  E.  Glaser.      Stop  Talking  About  Yourself  When  You  Apologize  Admitting  a  mistake  can  fall  flat  if  you  apologize  the  wrong  way.  The  victim  of  your  screw-­‐up  does  not   want   to   hear   about   you.   Instead   ask   yourself:  Who   am   I   talking   to,   and  what   is   he   or   she  looking  for  in  my  apology?    

• A   stranger   or  mere   acquaintance  wants   you   to   offer   compensation   or   some   redeeming  action.  Compensation  can  be  tangible,  like  paying  to  repair  your  neighbor's  fence  when  you  accidentally  back  your  car  into  it,  or  emotional,  like  being  extra  thoughtful.  

• Your   colleague  or   friend  wants  empathy.  When  you   recognize  and  express   concern  over  the  suffering  you  caused,  the  victim  feels  understood  and  valued,  and  trust  is  restored.  

• Your  team  wants  an  acknowledgement  of  the  rules  and  norms  you  violated.  Basically,  you  need  to  admit  that  you  broke  the  code  of  behavior  of  your  social  group  or  organization,  and  that  you  recognize  you  let  them  down.  

Adapted  from  “The  Most  Effective  Ways  to  Make  It  Right  When  You  Screw  Up,”  by  Heidi  Grant  Halvorson.  

Avoid  the  Pitfalls  of  Positive  Feedback  Praise  should  motivate  your  employees,  but  in  some  cases  it  does  just  the  opposite.  Here’s  how  to  make  sure  positive  feedback  actually  works:    

• Don’t  cushion  the  blow.  Don’t  routinely  say  something  “nice”  before  giving  criticism.  Doing  so   conditions   people   to   hear   positive   feedback   as   a   hollow   preamble   to   your   real  message.  Lead  instead  with  your  investment  in  the  relationship  and  reasons  for  having  the  conversation.  

• Praise  effort,  not  personal  attributes.  Intelligence,  talent,  or  abilities  are  mostly  innate  and  cannot   be   actively   replicated.   Instead,   compliment   effort   and   explain   exactly   what  actions  prompted  your  approval.  If  you’re  specific,  you’ll  reinforce  the  desired  behavior.  

Adapted  from  the  HBR  Guide  to  Coaching  Your  Employees.  

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3  Tips  to  Build  Better  Relationships  with  Your  Employees  When  people  feel  connected  to  you,  even  difficult  conversations  feel  less  threating.  Here  are  three  tips  to  forge  stronger  bonds  with  your  employees:    

• Relate   whenever   you   can.  View   every   interaction   as   an   opportunity   to   get   to   know  someone  a  little  better.  Make  a  habit  of  asking  employees  one  question  about  their  work  or  their  personal  lives  each  time  you  encounter  them.  

• Take  note  of  subtleties.  People  seek  emotional  connection  through  countless  small  “bids”  for   attention—questions,   gestures,   or   looks.   Take   stock   of   how  much   you   notice   these  cues  .  You  might  also  solicit  some  feedback  from  friends  and  family  on  how  well  you  listen  and  respond  to  social  cues  in  general.  

• Regularly   express   appreciation.  Research   shows   that   the   ratio   of   positive   to   negative  interactions   is   5:1   in   a   successful   relationship.   You   don’t   need   to   pay   someone   five  compliments  before  offering  criticism,  but  do  be  mindful  of  the  ratio.    Adapted  from  the  HBR  Guide  to  Coaching  Your  Employees.  

 Lower  Resistance  by  Listening  When  you  encounter  opposition  to  an  idea  or  suggestion,  you  can  strong-­‐arm  your  challenger  into  getting  what  you  want,  or  you  can   reinforce  your   relationship  by   listening.  When  you  coerce  an  employee   into  doing  something  –  even   if  he  complies  with  your  demands  –  his   initial   resistance  will  fester  over  time  and  may  come  back  to  bite  you  later.    When  someone  doesn't  agree  with  you,  it’s  natural  to  repeat  yourself,  often  more  loudly.  Instead,  if   you   are   getting   pushback,   listen.   Repeat   back   what   you've   heard   to   make   sure   you   truly  understand  what  the  other  person  means.  When  you  stop  trying  to  convince  someone  and  instead  focus  on  listening  to  his  point  of  view  and  respecting  it,  his  resistance  will  often  disappear.      Adapted  from  “Practical  Tips  for  Overcoming  Resistance,”  by  Mark  Goulston.    Give  Feedback  Like  a  Sports  Coach  As  a  manager,  you  play  different  roles  at  different  times  –  but  the  job  of  a  manager,  just  like  that  of   a   coach   or   teacher,   is   to   inspire   people   to   be   better.   Most   people   respond   better   to  encouragement  than  to  criticism,  so  give  praise  when  you  can.  According  to  Sir  Alex  Ferguson,  one  of  the  most  successful  coaches   in  sports  history,  nothing   is  better  than  hearing:  “Well  done.”  He  says,   “Those  are   the   two  best  words  ever   invented.  You  don’t  need   to  use   superlatives.”  At   the  same  time,  giving  clear  criticism  is  important  when  your  team  members  don’t  meet  expectations.  If  you  are  too  soft  in  your  approach,  you  won’t  be  effective  –  but  showing  your  anger  all  the  time  doesn’t  work,  either.  There’s  no  point  in  harping  on  criticism;  pick  your  moment,  do  it  right  away,  and  consider  it  done.  Your  timing  and  tone  matter.      Adapted  from  “Ferguson’s  Formula,”  by  Anita  Elberse  with  Sir  Alex  Ferguson.    How  to  Ask  Productive  Questions  If   you’re   like  most   team   leaders,   you  probably  make  more   statements   than  you  ask  questions  –  and   some   of   your   “questions”   are   in   name   only.  When   you   are   genuinely   curious,   you  want   to  learn  what  others  are  thinking  –  but  when  you  aren’t,  you  ask  rhetorical  questions;  not  for  a  real  answer,  but  to  make  a  point.  For  example:  “You  don’t  really  think  that  solution  will  work,  do  you?”  This  communication  style  leaves  team  members  feeling  insulted  or  defensive.  They  will  trust  you  less,  withdraw,   and  withhold   information   that   you  need   to  make   good  decisions.   If   you   already  

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know  the  answer  to  your  question  or  you  could  easy  tack  on  the  phrase  “you  idiot”  to  the  end  of  it,   it’s   rhetorical.   If   this   is   the   case,   change   your   inquiry   to   a   transparent   statement   that   shares  your  view,  including  your  reasoning  and  feelings.  Then  add  a  genuine  question  that  helps  you  learn  more   about   the   situation   and   helps   increase   your   team’s   curiosity   in   the   answer.      Adapted  from  “Increase  Your  Team's  Curiosity,”  by  Roger  Schwarz.    Maximize  Time  When  Meeting  with  Senior  Leaders  A  meeting  of  multiple  time-­‐starved  executives  is  a  massive  commitment  of  resources.  Focusing  on  low-­‐stakes   issues,   like   updates   or   presentations,   often   wastes   valuable   time.   Instead,  meetings  among  senior   leaders  should  tackle   the  organization’s  most  critical   issues.  Whether  you’re  a   top  executive  or  just  meeting  with  fellow  managers,  try  to  concentrate  on:    

• Fundamentals,  not  incrementals.  Measure  importance  by  the  number  of  zeros  involved:  Is  this   a   $5,000   decision   or   a   $5,000,000   decision?   If   there   aren’t   enough   zeros,   the  decision  isn’t  strategic  enough  to  absorb  time.  

• Future   leadership.  Current   leadership  must   engage   the   organization’s   up-­‐and-­‐comers   to  grow  the  company.  Develop  succession  plans  and  include  promising  leaders  in  strategic  discussions  to  foster  their  high-­‐level  decision-­‐making.  

• Undiscussables.  Whether  it  concerns  a  division’s  performance,  the  CEO’s  leadership  style,  or  a  conflict  among  the  senior  team,  important  topics  not  being  discussed  can  hold  your  organization   back.   Broaching   these   tough   topics   is   a   proven   way   to   improve  performance.  

Adapted   from  “Four   Areas   Where   Senior   Leaders   Should   Focus   Their   Attention,”   by  Peter  Bregman.  

Good  Leaders  Get  to  Know  Their  Emotions  Being  too  emotional  can  create  problems,  but  it  can  be  far  less  of  a  problem  than  holding  back  all  of  your  feelings.  You  may  hide  emotions  in  an  attempt  to  stay  in  control  and  look  strong,  but  doing  so  diminishes  your  control  and  weakens  your  capacity  to  connect  and  communicate  with  others.  If  you  struggle  with  sharing  your  true  feelings,   it  might  help  to  know  that  people  often  don’t  show  emotion   because   they’re   not   aware   of   what   they’re   feeling.   You  might   suppress   your   anger   or  temper  your  excitement  without  even   realizing   it.   So  pay  attention   to  your  emotions.  At   least  a  couple  of   times   a  week,   ask   yourself,   “What   am   I   feeling   right   now?”  Write   it   down   if   you   can;  keeping  a  regular  journal  can  help  you  understand  your  moods  and  what  changes  them.  Then  let  loose  a   little:   Let   your  emotions  out,   and   let  people   in.  Both  are   critical   to  effective   leadership.      Adapted  from  “Good  Leaders  Get  Emotional,”  by  Doug  Sundheim.    Tailor  Your  Coaching  to  Specific  Learning  Styles  An  effective  coach  meets  people  where  they  are.  As  you  coach  your  employees  to  develop  their  skills  or  improve  their  performance,  set  them  up  for  success  by  understanding  how  they  learn  best  and   adjusting   your   methods   accordingly.   Some   people   may   prefer   learning   in   the   moment,  through   intense   experience   and   goal-­‐directed   action.   Others   may   favor   retaining   information  reflectively,  through  sustained  meditation  and  analytical  thinking.  Coaching  will  likely  involve  some  combination   of   these   two   approaches.  With   people   who   prefer   an   active   style   of   learning,   for  example,   communicate   dynamically   and   encourage   on-­‐the-­‐job   experiments.   With   reflective  

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learners,  communicate  thoughtfully  and  allow  adequate  time  for  them  to  rehearse  quietly  on  their  own.  By  tapping   into  their  preferred  styles,  you  will  engage  employees  more  deeply  and  find  an  approach  to  learning  they  feel  motivated  to  follow.  As  a  result,  they’ll  make  greater—and  faster—progress  toward  their  goals.      Adapted  from  The  HBR  Guide  to  Coaching  Your  Employees.    Build  the  Right  Team  Behaviors  Even   though  most  management   systems   focus   on   individual   performance,   it’s   critical   to   reward  and  recognize  your  team  collectively.  As  a  team  manager,  support  the  right  group  behaviors  by:    

• Encouraging  collaboration.  Talk  about  your  people  as  a   team,  not  as  a   set  of   individuals.  Instead   of   talking   about   individuals’   contributions,   praise   the   common  behaviors   that  contribute  to  the  team’s  overall  success.  

• Evaluating   team   performance.    Every   six  months   or   so,   take   a   close   look   at   the   group’s  progress.   Don’t  mention   individuals   in   this   appraisal   but   focus   on  what   the   team  has  done—and  can  do—together.  

• Using   rewards.  If   you   are   able,   tie   a   portion   of   your   organization’s   discretionary  compensation   to   team   performance.   If   you   don’t   control   the   purse   strings,   try  recognizing  your   team’s  hard  work   in  a  public  way—through  a  departmental  email  or  even   displaying   their   picture   in   a   common   space—or   giving   them   exposure   to   senior  leaders.    Adapted  from  “How  to  Reward  Your  Stellar  Team,”  by  Amy  Gallo.  

Language  Is  an  Obstacle  to  Change  Language  can  be  a  shortcoming.  Think  about  “TV  show.”  It’s  a  term  that’s  been  around  since  the  1940s,  and  has  survived  into  the  multi-­‐platform  present.  But,  in  some  cases,  the  term  just  doesn’t  cut   it.   Netflix,   for   example   —   i.e.,   not   a   major   TV   network   —   produced   House   of   Cards,   and  allowed  fans  to  stream  the  political  drama  to  a  host  of  digital  devices.  But  Netflix  received  some  push   back   for   releasing   the   “episodes”   —   language,   again   —   in   one   fell   swoop   instead   of  episodically.  Why?  Well,   that’s  not  the  status  quo  for  a  TV  show.  Do  you  see  the  problem  here?  Outdated   language   has   a  way   of   clouding   our   judgment.   And   if   it  weren’t   for   our   insistence   on  hanging  onto  old  terms,  we’d  probably  be  more  open  to  change.  

SOURCE:  Can  You  Invent  Something  New  If  Your  Words  Are  Old?  by  Deborah  Mills-­‐Scofield    Be  Yourself,  but  Don’t  Overshare  A  rise   in   team-­‐based  workplaces  has  heightened   the  demand   for  managers  who  are  “authentic”  and   “instantly   intimate.”   But   sharing   your   thoughts,   feelings,   and   experiences   at   work   can  sometimes  backfire.  Here  are  a  few  pointers  for  effective—and  authentic—self-­‐disclosure:    

• Consider   relevance.  Before   sharing   personal   information,   ask   yourself   if   it’s   germane   to  the   situation.   Make   sure   it   contributes   to   the   overall   goal   of   building   trust   and  engendering  better  collaboration.  

• Understand  the  context.  Some  societies  are  more  inclined  than  others  to  disclose  personal  information.  Investigate  regional  and  organizational  norms  about  sharing  so  that  you’ll  know  when  it’s  best  to  keep  quiet.  

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• Delay   or   avoid   very   personal   disclosures.  In   some  workplaces,   you  will   eventually   find   it  safe   and   helpful   to   share;   in   others   you’ll   realize   it’s   unwise   to   do   so.    Adapted  from  “Be  Yourself,  but  Carefully,”  by  Lisa  Rosh  and  Lynn  Offermann.  

Don’t  Put  Off  Tough  Decisions  When   it   comes   to   organizational   change,   making   big   decisions   is   cognitively   and   emotionally  taxing.  But  when  team  leaders  fail  to  decide  which  old  directions  need  to  be  sacrificed  in  service  of  the   new   direction,   the   tradeoff   doesn’t  magically   disappear   –   it   simply   slides   down   the   ladder.  Trickle-­‐down  tradeoffs  create  two  major  problems  for  change  efforts:    

• Team  misalignment:  When  a  team  leader  avoids  the  discomfort  of  deciding  priorities,  each  team   member   has   to   decide   what   her   priorities   are   –   and   it’s   highly   unlikely   that  everyone  will  independently  arrive  at  the  same  conclusions.  

• Poor   judgment:  Making   tradeoffs  depletes  our  overall  mental   capacity.  When  your   team  has  to  spend  a  long  morning  making  the  tradeoffs  that  leaders  haven’t,  it  easily  leads  to  long  afternoons  of  making  poor  choices  for  their  customers,  their  workloads,  and  their  budgets.    Adapted   from  “To   Move   Ahead   You   Have   to   Know   What   to   Leave   Behind,”   by   Nick  Tasler.  

Don’t  Extend  the  Deadline—Plan  Better    You  may  want  to  rethink  postponing  that  deadline.  Although  it’s  a  relief  to  be  “given”  more  time,  we  rarely  use  extensions  wisely;  instead,  we  lose  motivation,  procrastinate,  and  wind  up  facing  the  same  situation  again  later.  Address  poor  time  planning  with  these  tips:    

• Shorten   the  distance   to  your  ultimate  goal.  This  will   keep  motivation  high,  and  keep   the  pressure  on  for  procrastinators.   Impose   interim  deadlines,  breaking  a   larger  objective  up  into  mini-­‐targets  spaced  out  strategically  in  time.  These  deadlines  need  to  be  meaningful,  though—  if  it’s  no  big  deal  to  miss  the  deadline,  then  it’s  not  a  real  deadline.  

• Become   a   realistic   judge   of   how   longs   things   will   take.  Consider   how   long   it’s   taken   to  complete   similar  projects   in   the  past,  and   try   to   identify   the  ways   in  which   things  might  not   go   as   planned.   Break   the   project   down   in   detail,   estimating   the   time   needed   to  complete  each  step  and  allowing  for  snags  in  your  schedule.  

   Adapted   from  “Here’s   What   Really   Happens   When   You   Extend   a   Deadline,”   by   Heidi   Grant  Halvorson.    How  to  Manage  Someone  You  Don’t  Like    If  you’re   like  most   leaders,  you  probably  gravitate  towards  direct  reports  who  act  nice  and  don’t  deliver  bad  news.  But   it’s  often  those  who  provoke  or  challenge  you—the  people  you   like   less—who  prompt  new   insights   and  help  propel   the  group   to   success.  When  you  dislike  an  employee  you  might—consciously  or  not—mismanage  him,  treat  him  unfairly,  or  fail  to  see  the  real  benefit  he  can  deliver.  To  get  the  most  out  of  someone  you  don’t  like:    

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• Learn  how  to  handle  your  frustration.  Don’t   let  your  distaste  show.  Everyone  wants  their  boss  to  like  them,  and  your  employee  might  presume  that  any  disapproval  has  to  do  with  his  performance.  Remain  fair,  impartial,  and  composed.  

• Check  your  bias.  If   you’re  having   trouble  being   fair,   seek   counsel   from  another  manager  who   is   familiar   with   the   employee’s   work.   Ask   whether   your   evaluation   matches   the  outsider’s.  

• Keep   an   open   mind.  It   might   help   to   spend   more   time   with   the   problem   employee,  perhaps  by  collaborating  on  a  difficult  task.  Remember  that  perspectives  change,  and  your  favorite  employee  today  might  become  your  least  favorite  tomorrow.  

 Adapted  from  “How  to  Manage  Someone  You  Don’t  Like,”  by  Amy  Gallo.