“WANNA”

WRIT

E A G

OOD

THES

IS S

TATE

MENT?

F O

L L OW

TH

ES

E S

I MP

L E S

TE

PS

FIRST OF ALL,

#1 Write a statement…. NOT an announcement.

For example, this is an announcement:

“In this essay I am going to talk about crime in Puerto Rico.”

This is a statement:

“Crime on our Island has several serious causes such as unemployment, drugs, and deteriorating family values.”

Another announcement: “How to dance salsa is the topic of my essay.”

Change to:

“Rhythm, great musicians

and tradition give salsa

its popularity.”

Is this a statement or an announcement?

“The topic of this paper is the importance of recycling in Puerto Rico and the world.”

How would you change it?

(Write your answer in your notebook.)

#2 Avoid statements that are too broad.

Example:

“Disease has shaped human history.”

(Why is this a broad statement?)

A possible change could be:

“In the 1980’s, AIDS changed people’s attitudes about dating.”

(Why is this better?)

(How could it be an even better thesis statement?)

“In the 1980’s, AIDS changed people’s attitudes about dating, medical expenses and sex education.”

Now the thesis statement has a 3-point plan of development.

Here’s another example of a broad statement:

“Insects are fascinating insects.”

Why is it too broad?

Write a narrower 3-point thesis statement

in your notebook.

#3 A thesis statement should not be too narrow.

Example:

“Last week classes were suspended due to a tropical storm.”

Why is that statement considered narrow?

How about this one?

“Predicting storms is still an inexact science.”

(Improve that statement even more.”Write your suggestion in your

notebook.)

#4 Make sure statements develop only one idea.

“Studying with others has its benefits, but it also has many drawbacks.”

Rewrite this statement using only one main idea.

How about this?

“Three benefits of studying with a partner include dividing up the material to be studied, clarifying doubts, and quizzing each other.”

LET’S REVIEW…

A good thesis statement should:

1.Be a statement, NOT an announcement.

2.NOT be too broad.

3.NOT be too narrow.

4.Develop only one idea.

5.Have a 3-point plan of development.

6.Include the topic and the writer’s attitude, opinion, idea, or point of view.

7.Appear at the end of the introductory paragraph.

PRACTICE EXERCISE: IDENTIFY EACH OF THE FOLLOWING STATEMENTS AS EITHER TOO NARROW (TN) OR TOO BROAD (TB). REWRITE EACH OF THEM SO THAT THEY ARE EFFECTIVE THESIS STATEMENTS.

1.There are excellent athletes in Puerto Rico.

2.One of our most famous basketball players is José Juan Barea.

3.This month we commemorate the 24th anniversary of Hurricane Hugo.

4.UHS is the best school around.