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Social Capital, Social Service, Social IntelligenceThe ConnectionFollow me @Jonathansaar

Knowing and Improving Yourself

Chapter 2: Knowing and Improving Yourself2

Emotional Intelligence is something that affects every aspect of your life. Understanding the root causes of your emotions and how to use them can help you to identify effectively who you are and how you interact with others.

Emotions

Emotional Intelligence is something that affects every aspect of your life. Understanding the root causes of your emotions and how to use them can help you to identify effectively who you are and how you interact with others.

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Lets look at an example of how emotions can affect the workplace.4

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That didnt go well. Lets discuss some skills that would have come in handy in this situation.6

Self Management

You cant always predict when residents or prospects will walk into your office and need your attention. But even in the chaos, there are best practicesthat must be followed in orderto be successful.

A chaotic and sometimes a disorganized business

Self ManagementAs you know, the multifamily industry can be a chaotic and sometimes a disorganized business. You cant always predict when residents or prospects will walk into your office and need your attention. But even in the chaos, there are best practices that must be followed in order to be successful.

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Self Management

Setting of goals

Decision making

Planning

Scheduling

In order to effectively achieve your overall career objectives or the objectives within a given task, you must use clearly defined methods to carry out those activities.

Once the tasks are completed, you must evaluate the success of these methods.In order to effectively achieve your overall career objectives or the objectives within a given task8

Self Management

Setting of goals

Decision making

Planning

Scheduling

In order to effectively achieve your overall career objectives or the objectives within a given task, you must use clearly defined methods to carry out those activities.

Once the tasks are completed, you must evaluate the success of these methods.

Be consistentPart of self management is theability to be stable. The values youhold dear should always be apparent. Always changing to the whim of your peers or customers can not only cause others to question your beliefs, but it can also cause you to become confused about what you truly believe.

Five key points to remember to help you with self management

Here is a list of five key points to remember to help you master the art of self management.Be consistent. Part of self management is the ability to be stable. The values you hold dear should always be apparent. Always changing to the whim of your peers or customers can not only cause others to question your beliefs9

Self Management

Stick to the plan

Be consistentIf you are responsible for particular tasks, do them. Dont just do them, but make sure they are done to the best of your ability and in a timely manner. It is easy to feel out of control when you disregard the plan you are to follow.

Five key points to remember to help you with self managementStick to the plan. If you are responsible for particular tasks, do them. Dont just do them, but make sure they are done to the best of your ability and in a timely manner. It is easy to feel out of control when you disregard the plan you are to follow.10

Be accountable

Stick to the plan

Be consistentThere are times when things dont work out as you plan, but you have to be able to admit that and then use your flexibility to get things back on track. The ideal result is that you easily bounce back and complete the task, but even during those times when this is not the case, you must adjust.

Self Management

Five key points to remember to help you with self managementBe accountable. There are times when things dont work out as you plan, but you have to be able to admit that and then use your flexibility to get things back on track. The ideal result is that you easily bounce back and complete the task, but even during those times when this is not the case, you must adjust.

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Be accountable

Educate yourself

Stick to the plan

Be consistentWe live in an ever-changing world and you want to be able to keep up with it. Dont let change pass you by; embrace it. Be an avid reader. Talk and listen to mentors and peers. They may know something that could help you along your journey.

Self Management

Five key points to remember to help you with self managementEducate yourself. We live in an ever-changing world and you want to be able to keep up with it. Dont let change pass you by; embrace it. Be an avid reader. Talk and listen to mentors and peers. They may know something that could help you along your journey.

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Self Management

Stay physically fit

Be accountable

Educate yourself

Stick to the plan

Be consistentMany people dont think of staying fit when they talk about self-management, but it is very important. Exercising your body is just as crucial to self management as exercising your mind. A body that is not well rested, nutritionally fed or physically exercised can lead to emotional and physical illnesses.

Five key points to remember to help you with self management

Stay physically fit. Many people dont think of staying fit when they talk about self-management, but it is very important. Exercising your body is just as crucial to self management as exercising your mind. A body that is not well rested, nutritionally fed or physically exercised can lead to emotional and physical illnesses.

Now, lets take a quick quiz.13

Being aware of ones self is the ability to accurately perceive ones skills and knowledge, value and responsibilities. It is being confident in what you have to offer, personally or professionally.

Self Awareness

Self AwarenessBeing aware of ones self is the ability to accurately perceive ones skills and knowledge, value and responsibilities. It is being confident in what you have to offer, personally or professionally.

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Self Awareness

Important forself-esteem

Without understanding why you think the way you think or why you act the way you act, you may never fully appreciate yourself or see the importance of making changes to improve yourself, if necessary.

The first step to the process of full acceptance or change

Self awareness is not only important for ones self-esteem, but it is also the first step to the process of full acceptance or change. Without understanding why you think the way you think or why you act the way you act, you may never fully appreciate yourself or see the importance of making changes to improve yourself, if necessary.15

Self Awareness

This newly found strength will more than likely carry over into your work life, how you perform your duties as well as how you interact with others.

Self awareness gives power and a sense of peace or happiness. This newly found strength will more than likely carry over into your work life16

Self Awareness

Auto pilot portion of your brain

You may not be aware of your achievements or lack of achievements

Lack of self awareness can cause you to not realize:

The lack of self awareness can cause you to not realize the quality level of the work you perform. If you go to work and basically turn on the auto pilot portion of your brain17

Self Awareness

This can have an even more dramatic effect when dealing with residents and prospects. Not only will you have doubts about yourself, but the people you interact with will also begin to question your competence, which could ultimately lead to a lack of trust and effectiveness.

This can have an even more dramatic effect when dealing with residents and prospects. Not only will you have doubts about yourself18

Self Regulation

Self Regulation is another term for self control, which is defined as the ability to control ones emotions, desires and behaviors in order to reach a positive outcome.

The art of finding the balance between expressing your feelings and avoiding unnecessary tension is known as self regulation.

Self regulation is sometimes difficult because we have always heard that it is important to express how you feel.

Self RegulationSelf Regulation is another term for self control, which is defined as the ability to control ones emotions, desires and behaviors in order to reach a positive outcome. Self regulation is sometimes difficult because we have always heard that it is important to express how you feel. While this may be partially true, the art of finding the balance between expressing your feelings and avoiding unnecessary tension is known as self regulation.19

Self Regulation

Three types of pressure:

Self Regulation

The type of pressure one is experiencing

At times you may experience pressure from others that may increase your need to self regulate. Self Regulation is a direct reflection of the type of pressure one is experiencing. There are three types of pressure:20

Self Regulation

This type of pressure is the result of an aggressive yet non-critical and non-harmful atmosphere. One aspires to be like the people around him / her. This motivation leads to the acquisition of self regulation.

Three types of pressure:

Good Pressure

Good Pressure: This type of pressure is the result of an aggressive yet non-critical and non-harmful atmosphere. One aspires to be like the people around him / her. This motivation leads to the acquisition of self regulation.21

Bad pressure is the when the atmosphere is critical and harmful. One has no motivation and loses self regulation.We all experience bad pressure at times. Gaining theability to self regulate your emotions during bad pressurewill allow you to become even more successful in life.

Self Regulation

This type of pressure is the result of an aggressive yet non-critical and non-harmful atmosphere. One aspires to be like the people around him / her. This motivation leads to the acquisition of self regulation.

Good Pressure

Bad Pressure

Three types of pressure:

Bad Pressure: Bad pressure is the when the atmosphere is critical and harmful. One has no motivation and loses self regulation. We all experience bad pressure at times. Gaining the ability to self regulate your emotions during bad pressure will allow you to become even more successful in life.22

Bad pressure is the when the atmosphere is critical and harmful. One has no motivation and loses self regulation.We all experience bad pressure at times. Gaining theability to self regulate your emotions during bad pressurewill allow you to become even more successful in life.

Bad Pressure

Self Regulation

This type of pressure is the result of an aggressive yet non-critical and non-harmful atmosphere. One aspires to be like the people around him / her. This motivation leads to the acquisition of self regulation.

Good Pressure

When one is not experiencing any pressure, he/she tends to act based on emotion, since there is no one to compare him/herself to.

No Pressure

Three types of pressure:

No Pressure: When one is not experiencing any pressure, he/she tends to act based on emotion, since there is no one to compare him/herself to.

Now lets play a quick game.

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Wow. Mary seems to be having a bad day. She will never be successful with this attitude. Lets discuss some factors that will have a more positive impact on her life.25

Self Motivation

Andrew Carnegie

People who are unable tomotivate themselves must be content with mediocrity, no matter how impressive theirother talents.

Self MotivationPeople who are unable to motivate themselves must be content with mediocrity26

Self Motivation

Andrew Carnegie

People who are unable tomotivate themselves must be content with mediocrity, no matter how impressive theirother talents.

Self motivation is an essential part of excelling at life. However, at times, staying motivated is a real struggle. You have many factors both inside and out that will influence your mood and thereby influence your self motivation.

Andrew Carnegie said it best. Self motivation is an essential part of excelling at life. However27

Self MotivationThere are several keys to building self motivation:

Motivate Yourself

You cannot depend on others to do it for you

You have to know how to encourage yourself regardless of how bad the situation.

You must learn to motivate yourself because you cannot depend on others to do it for you. You have to know how to encourage yourself regardless of how bad the situation.There are several keys to building self motivation.28

Self MotivationWork toward a cause. Stay focused and dont let anyone or anything make you lose sight of your goal.

Focus

There are several keys to building self motivation:Focus - Work toward a cause. Stay focused and dont let anyone or anything make you lose sight of your goal.

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Self MotivationWork toward a cause. Stay focused and dont let anyone or anything make you lose sight of your goal.

FocusHave confidence in yourself and dont compare yourself to others. Believe that you can succeed regardless of the obstacles.

Confidence

There are several keys to building self motivation:Confidence - Have confidence in yourself and dont compare yourself to others. Believe that you can succeed regardless of the obstacles.30

Self MotivationWork toward a cause. Stay focused and dont let anyone or anything make you lose sight of your goal.

FocusHave confidence in yourself and dont compare yourself to others. Believe that you can succeed regardless of the obstacles.Keep trying until you achieve the desired outcome.

Confidence

Never, Never, Never give up

There are several keys to building self motivation:Never31

Self MotivationWork toward a cause. Stay focused and dont let anyone or anything make you lose sight of your goal.

FocusHave confidence in yourself and dont compare yourself to others. Believe that you can succeed regardless of the obstacles.Keep trying until you achieve the desired outcome.Dont live in your past failures or successes. Always look to the future. If your methods are not working for you today, change them and try something new tomorrow.

Confidence

Never, Never, Never give up

Be Forward Thinking

There are several keys to building self motivation:Be Forward Thinking - Dont live in your past failures or successes. Always look to the future. If your methods are not working for you today, change them and try something new tomorrow.32

Self MotivationIs your glass half full or half empty? How you see the world, people and situation will greatly impact your success in life.Work toward a cause. Stay focused and dont let anyone or anything make you lose sight of your goal.

FocusHave confidence in yourself and dont compare yourself to others. Believe that you can succeed regardless of the obstacles.

ConfidenceKeep trying until you achieve the desired outcome.

Never, Never, Never give upDont live in your past failures or successes. Always look to the future. If your methods are not working for you today, change them and try something new tomorrow.

Be Forward Thinking

Think Positively

There are several keys to building self motivation:

Think Positively - Is your glass half full or half empty? How you see the world33

There are times when you may need motivation to get motivated.

Self Motivation

Consider these suggestions:

Positive thinking may not be doing the trick.

There are times when you may need motivation to get motivated. Positive thinking may not be doing the trick. What should you do? Consider these suggestions:

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There are times when you may need motivation to get motivated.Positive thinking may not be doing the trick.

Self Motivation

Consider these suggestions:Write down your plan for improvement.Briefly think about your past successes.Read books that promote self motivation.

Write down your plan for improvement.Briefly think about your past successes.Read books that promote self motivation.

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Skills in Emotional Intelligence

Chapter 3: Four Skills in Emotional Intelligence36

Manage Your Emotions

Use Your Emotions

Becoming an "Engaged" Professional requires a high level of what is known as Emotional Intelligence.

Understand Emotional Meanings

Becoming an "Engaged" Professional requires a high level of what is known as Emotional Intelligence. And developing high Emotional Intelligence is begun by understanding your own emotions and their meanings. With this understanding37

Understand Emotional Meanings

If you know why you are unhappy,you can either alter the thing that is making you unhappy or consciously tell yourself that thing is not worth allowing you to be upset, which can ultimately turn your negative mood into a positive one.

The underlying reason for why you feel the way you do is very important to understand.

Understand Emotional MeaningsThe underlying reason for why you feel the way you do is very important to understand. If you know why you are unhappy, you can either alter the thing that is making you unhappy or consciously tell yourself that thing is not worth allowing you to be upset, which can ultimately turn your negative mood into a positive one. 38

Understand Emotional Meanings

The underlying reason for why you feel the way you do is very important to understand.

Having this understanding cannot only be used to internally gauge yourself, but can also help with how you interact with co-workers, prospectsand residents.

Having this understanding can not only be used to internally gauge yourself39

Manage Your Emotions

Managing your emotions is a conscious and active task.

Establish strategies that utilize your emotions to help accomplish a goal rather than allowing your emotions to inhibit your ability to reach your goal

Manage Your EmotionsKnowing what emotion you are exhibiting or understanding the reason for that emotion is not enough to manage your emotions. Managing your emotions is a conscious and active task. This can be done in several ways. The overall goal is to establish strategies that utilize your emotions to help accomplish a goal rather than allowing your emotions to inhibit your ability to reach your goal.40

Manage Your Emotions

Managing your emotions is a conscious and active task.

Establish strategies that utilize your emotions to help accomplish a goal rather than allowing your emotions to inhibit your ability to reach your goal

RememberYour emotions are not the enemy. They contain valuable information that can help you make sound decisions if used properly.

It is important to remember that your emotions are not the enemy. They contain valuable information that can help you make sound decisions if used properly.41

Use Emotions to Facilitate Thinking

How you feel will determine how you view situations. If you are in a happy mood, everyday events dont seem so bad. On the contrary, if you are not in a happy mood, even the smallest of situations can seem major to you.

Use Emotions to Facilitate ThinkingUse your emotions to facilitate your thinking This is such a profound statement. How you feel will determine how you view situations. If you are in a happy mood, everyday events dont seem so bad. On the contrary, if you are not in a happy mood, even the smallest of situations can seem major to you.42

Use Emotions to Facilitate Thinking

When it comes to the workplace, regardless of your mood, you are expected to be a high performer. You may not realize this, but you do have the ability to choose your mood. It does take practice and the ability to recognize your current mood. Make it easy on yourself and choose to be in a good mood.

It takes practice

When it comes to the workplace, regardless of your mood, you are expected to be a high performer. You may not realize this, but you do have the ability to choose your mood. It does take practice and the ability to recognize your current mood. Make it easy on yourself and choose to be in a good mood.

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How to Accurately Perceive Emotions

The words that people say are only half of the message they are trying to get across. The tone in which they say it, or the emotion tied to their words, is the other half.

How to Accurately Perceive EmotionsThe words that people say are only half of the message they are trying to get across. The tone in which they say it44

How to Accurately Perceive Emotions

The ability to decide the manner in which things are being said lies in your knack of being able to decode the message by looking beyond the words themselves.

The ability to decide the manner in which things are being said lies in your knack of being able to decode the message by looking beyond the words themselves. 45Judgmentabout whatis said

How to Accurately Perceive EmotionsYour emotional state of being

Focus on the message itself (verbally and non- verbally) in orderto perceive accurately the emotions of others.

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It is important that you do not allow your emotional state of being to cloud your judgment of what is being said. Focus on the message itself (verbally and non-verbally) in order to perceive accurately the emotions of others.

Lets watch a quick video.46

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Mary did not handle that well at all. How could she have managed her emotions better?

Mary did not handle that well at all. How could she have managed her emotions better? poll question 48

Chapter 4: Empathy

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Chapter 4: 49

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What is missing here? what emotional intelligence skill could have been used to better relate to the prospect?

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Recognize

Classify

Understand

Being able to share in the feelings of others, whether joy or sadness, is an admirable trait.

Being able to share in the feelings of others52

Alvin Goldman

The ability to put oneself into the mental shoes of another person to understand his or her emotions and feelings.

Empathy has been defined by others as:

Empathy has been defined by others as:Alvin Goldman: The ability to put oneself into the mental shoes of another person to understand his or her emotions and feelings.

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Martin Hoffman

An effective response more appropriate to another's situation than one's own

Empathy has been defined by others as:

Martin Hoffman: An effective response more appropriate to another's situation than one's own

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For example, a leasing professional who hears the prospect say that they have been forced to find a new place to live in a short period of time should imagine the distress of having to rely on a phone call and internet website to determine where his or her next home will be.

Your pain in my heart

Empathy has been described as, your pain in my heart. For example, a leasing professional who hears the prospect say that they have been forced to find a new place to live in a short period of time should imagine the distress of having to rely on a phone call and internet website to determine where his or her next home will be.55

Not only is empathycomforting for the person who is going through the situation, but its also good for the empathizer because it strengthens his or her ability to positively react to negative situations.

Not only is empathy comforting for the person who is going through the situation, but its also good for the empathizer because it strengthens his or her ability to positively react to negative situations.56

The ideal situation would befor a person to express their issues and you empathize with them, but the fact is, people arent always as forthcoming with their problems, even though it is obvious that there is something wrong. Since this is the case, you may be forced to ask questions or read between the lines of what is said.

Empathy is not as simple as it sounds

Empathy is not as simple as it sounds. The ideal situation would be for a person to express their issues and you empathize with them, but the fact is, people arent always as forthcoming with their problems, even though it is obvious that there is something wrong. Since this is the case, you may be forced to ask questions or read between the lines of what is said. 57

Tone of voiceBody language

This requires discernment on your part

Discernment

keen perception or judgment; acuteness of judgment and understanding

The ability to perceive things that may not be readily obvious will greatly improve your capacity to empathize with the other person and quickly meet their needs.

You can also focus on cues such as body language and tone of voice. This requires discernment on your part; a skill that should also be developed. Discernment is defined as keen perception or judgment; acuteness of judgment and understanding. The ability to perceive things that may not be readily obvious will greatly improve your capacity to empathize with the other person and quickly meet their needs.58Empathetic Listening Involves Five Basic Tasks:Repeat verbatim the content of the communication; the words, not the feelings1Rephrase content; summarize the meaning of the words in your own words2Reflect feelings; look more deeply and begin to capture feelings in your own words. Look beyond words for body language and tone of voice to indicate feelings.3Rephrase contents and reflect feelings; express both their words and feelings in your own words.4Discern when empathy is not necessary or appropriate.5

According to Stephen Covey in The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, empathetic listening involves five basic tasks:Repeat verbatim the content of the communication; the words, not the feelingsRephrase content; summarize the meaning of the words in your own wordsReflect feelings; look more deeply and begin to capture feelings in your own words. Look beyond words for body language and tone of voice to indicate feelings.Rephrase contents and reflect feelings; express both their words and feelings in your own words.Discern when empathy is not necessary or appropriate.59

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Think about the video you viewed earlier; lets look at how it could have gone better.

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As you can see, a little empathy goes a long way in easing the prospects fears and stresses.62

Challenges of Digital Communication

Ever Feel Like You are Talking to a Brick Wall ?65Lack of Face to Face

What Do You Lose out on when there is no Face to Face?

Body Language is Gone

Bring the noise!!!

How does our sight and hearing affect our Trust?

Establishing the Trust FactorConsistent Posting Whether Its Facebook, Twitter, Blogs etcResearching Content that is actually useful to your networkPunctuality in Responding to Fan FeedbackBe quick to show commendation and thankfulness to your networkReliable and Valuable Partnership Marketing

Mental Challenge of Bridging the Gap Between Face to Face and Digital

Using Facebook to Build Social CapitalGoal-create plenty of positive interactions to offset negative eventsIdentify Your Brand Advocates and Encourage Their InfluenceExplore different times of day and days of week to establish when your audience is engagingThere is no one size fits all when it comes to using FacebookWhy is that?Use tools like HyperAlerts to monitor feedback on your pages and others

Get Past the Boring Status UpdatesCome check out the poolFresh baked cookies!!Remember your rent is dueNow leasingThe pool is closedLease specials

Be Creative!!Use local sports hype

VS

Be Creative!!Opinions on TV showsThe VoiceChicago FireCriminal MindsThe X FactorBacheloretteAmerican IdolSo You Think You Can DanceAny others?

Food and Booze!!

Thank Your Residents/Clients Often

Address Issues Openly

Address Issues Openly

Feature Your Residents/Clients

Difference Between ROI and ROEROI-Return on InvestmentROE-Return on EngagementROI-numbers, stats, percentages, budgetsROE-conversations, network growth, WOMM

You Cant Be An Antisocial Company in a Social World

Keys to success in building social capitalFull Company Buy-in and ParticipationPlan, Strategize, Implement, Analyze, RepeatBe ready for tomorrowWe each have two ears and one mouthSimply Ask

Daily changes..hard to project 3 years from now84Social Media an Aid to Conflict Resolution

It is a common business fact that overall positive interactions reduce the level of the conflicts when they occurThe Scale of Social Capital71% of consumers have ended their relationship with a company due to poor customer serviceGlobally, the average value of a lost customer is $243$83 billion is the cost of poor customer service in the USCompanies focus on acquisition more than customer retention, even though it can cost 7x more to acquire new customersA 2% increase in customer retention has the same effect as decreasing costs by 10%***Sourcegetsatisfaction.com***

Whats In a Handshake?

Making Eye Contact in a Digital World

Smile When You Type

In ConclusionBe part of something biggerEducate yourself on the tools that facilitate a digital communityDont just give customer service..be customer centric!Be consistent yet flexibleHave Fun!Profit!

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