the pulse 11.48 » november 27, 2014

The PulseCHATTANOOGA'S WEEKLY ALTERNATIVE NOVEMBER 27, 2014

MUSIC

leaf crownpaSt & preSent

artS

the floorgetS wIde open

ShoppIng

gift guide what'S Cool

2 • The Pulse • NOVEMBER 27-DEcEMBER 3, 2014 • chaTTanoogaPulse.com

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chaTTanoogaPulse.com • NOVEMBER 27-DEcEMBER 3, 2014 • The Pulse • 3

THE FINE PRINT: The Pulse is published weekly by Brewer media and is distributed throughout the city of chattanooga and surrounding communities. The Pulse covers a broad range of topics concentrating on music, the arts, entertainment, culture and local news. The Pulse is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. no person without written permission from the publisher may take more than one copy per weekly issue. The Pulse may be distributed only by authorized distributors. contents copyright © 2014 by Brewer media. all rights reserved.

Features4 BEGINNINGS: On immigraton debate, as usual, follow the money.

14 REVIEWS: Circa Survive evolves, Rye Baby gets simple.

15 hOlIDay ShOPPING GUIDE

29 BUSINESS: Camp Jordan lights up for the holidays.

21 JONESIN’ cROSSWORD

26 SPIRITS: An apple whiskey a day…

27 FREE WIll aSTROlOGy

29 ScREEN: Jon Stewart’s “Rosewater” is effective debut.

30 ON ThE BEaT: Officer Alex explains that it’s the little things that mean a lot. Like sauerkraut.

31 DIVERSIONS

The PulseCHATTANOOGA'S WEEKLY ALTERNATIVE

EDITORIALManaging Editor gary Poole

contributing Editor Janis hashe

contributorsDavid Traver adolphus • Rob Brezsny madeline chambliss • John DeVore

mike Dobbs • hayley graham Janis hashe • matt Jones

ernie Paik • Rick Pimental-habibTerry stulce • alex Teach

Editorial Internsmaggie hanna • Zach nicholson

Rachael Poe

cartoonists & IllustratorsRick Baldwin • max cannon

Jen sorenson • Tom Tomorrow

Founded 2003 by Zachary cooper & Michael Kull

ADVERTISINGDirector of Sales mike Baskin

account Executives chee chee Brown • Julie Brown

angela lanham • Rick leavellchester sharp • stacey Tyler

CONTACT Offices

1305 carter st. chattanooga, Tn 37402

Phone423.265.9494

Fax423.266.2335

Website chattanoogapulse.com

Email [email protected]

BREWER MEDIA GROUPPublisher & President Jim Brewer II

november 27, 2014Volume 11, Issue 48

6 Out To Conquer The WorldManchester, England is not usually the first city in the United Kingdom that comes to mind when one thinks “music city.”

London, Liverpool, Birmingham—even Glasgow have all been epicenters for various waves of musicians and bands coming

“across the pond” to conquer America.

11 Artlessness: Love Story Times TwoFlash back a few years, when Chattanooga-raised singer/

songwriter Taylor Smith’s work visa in Australia fell through, forcing him to return to Tennessee after five years, leaving

behind his girlfriend of the previous year and a half.

23 Hit the Floor Wide OpenMarcus Ellsworth commands attention the moment he walks into a room. He is not bombastic or over-the-top, but when he steps forward and speaks, you listen. It’s a talent that has

become his passion, sharing his thoughts through spoken word.

Contents

Used Books, CDs, Movies, & More

7734 Lee Highway • McKayBooks.comMon-Thu 9am-9pm • Fri-Sat 9am-10pm • Sun 11am-7pm

Shop where the big guy shops. Early.And don’t forget to buy for yourself, too.


NEWS • VIEWS • RANTS • RAVESUPDATES » chaTTanoogaPulse.com FACEBOOk/chaTTanoogaPulse

EMaIl loVe leTTeRs, aDVIce & TRash TalK To [email protected]

Op-Ed: As Usual, Follow The MoneyWhy are Tennessee’s senators really so mad about immigration?

To maintain this criminalization of immigration, CCA donates large sums of money to ‘friends’ in the U.S. House and Senate.”

“Even before President Obama

delivered his policy statement on immigration last Thursday, Sen. Bob Corker appeared on Fox News snarling and salivating. He appeared to be overcome by his hatred of the president, unleashing a torrent of insults that were, at the very least, highly disrespectful, and at worst, slanderous. He kept repeating “weak president,” “weak leader,” and “worst president in U.S. histo-ry,” even though the Fox interview-er attempted to help him escape his obsessive verbal loop.

Let’s consider that his emotional agitation may have completely ne-

gated his short-term memory, because he appar-ently could not recall George Bush, who really was the worst president in U.S. history, having gone to sleep at the switch, which allowed Bin Laden to knock down the Twin Towers, start-ing two wars that have proven to be abysmal failures, and wrecking the economy with de-

regulation, bring-ing on the Great Recession. Now that is a bad presi-dent!

In comparison, under President

Obama, the stock market has skyrocketed from 7,949 to 17,826. Unemployment has de-creased from 7.8 percent to 5.8 percent. The GDP achieved a gain of 9.9 percent in six years. The deficit has decreased from 9.8 percent to 2.8 percent GDP. Consumer confidence has in-creased from 37.7 percent to 94.5 percent.

President Obama pulled us out of the worst recession in U.S. history, and now millions of Americans have affordable health care that had no chance of obtaining it under George Bush. Bin Laden has been terminated with extreme prejudice and the president has resisted the in-fluence of American chicken hawks to start an-other stupid war. That is a mighty fine record.

So what motivated Sen. Corker’s outburst? Is he just playing to the racist vote in the South? Suppressing the minority vote while getting 75 percent of the white vote was a winning strat-egy for the Dixiecrats for decades. Yet I believe there is an even more sinister motivation.

The Faithful Democracy Coalition points out that Corrections Corporation of America (CCA) has been “covertly maneuvering in im-

migration policy to increase de-tention rates while intentionally misleading the public about their efforts.”

The Continuing Appropria-tions Act of 2014 was passed with the strong support of both of Tennessee’s senators, Corker and Alexander. It mandates that the U.S. Immigrations and Customs Enforcement Agency detain an average of 34,000 immigrant prisoners every day at a cost of $2 billion annually to taxpayers. Criminalizing undocumented immigration is a lucrative busi-ness for CCA. The more im-migrants imprisoned, the more profits for CCA.

To maintain this criminaliza-tion of immigration, CCA donates large sums of money to “friends” in the U.S. House and Senate. CCA has donated $51,450 to Bob Corker and $70,450 to La-mar Alexander. Any move to de-criminalize immigration will be strongly opposed by CCA—and by proxy, their “friends.”

Maybe both Tennessee sena-tors are pandering to their party’s radical right fringe. Maybe both simply lack the ability to empa-thize with real people. Or maybe their anti-immigrant stances are the result of their having sold their allegiances to corporate power and money.

Politicsterry stulce

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If you’re looking for something fun to do with your friends and family this holiday season, Chatta-nooga won’t let you down. While most of the city’s annual festivities opening this week keep your feet solidly on the ground, there is one new attrac-tion that requires your pedal extremities to glide.

On Friday Nov. 28, Chattanooga’s first riverfront ice skat-ing rink, Ice on the Landing, will open to the general public!

It’s scheduled from 5 p.m. to 11 p.m. on that first eve. Come get a close-up

view of the Lighted Boat Parade as you make your way around the rink. In honor of the opening, the penguins from the Ten-nessee Aquarium will be joining the party until 9 p.m.

Presented by Volkswa-gen Chattanooga, Ice on

the Landing is an open-air rink mea-suring 50’ x 70’ that organizers say, “will feature a schedule to accommo-

date general skating for the public, as well as special themes, appearances by Santa, and a rotating schedule to ben-efit not-for-profit groups.”

Located at Ross’s Landing at the riv-erfront park, Ice on the Landing will be open for six weeks, with the last day set for January 4, 2015.

Tickets, which include skate rental and skating for two hours, are $10 for adults and $8 for children 12 and un-der. Hours vary by date and weather and can be checked by visiting iceon-thelanding.com

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EdiToonby Rick Baldwin

It's a “Skate-A-Palooza” at Ross’s Landing

This week’s cover story on The 1975 is by manag-ing edi-

tor Gary Poole. A longtime musician himself, Gary has an appreciation for any band that carves their own path through the musical world. When not writing about music, he handles the day-

to-day operations of The Pulse as well as many of the layout and design duties. His lifelong love affair with newspapers started when he founded his middle school newspaper. Along the way, he's written for a wide variety of local, regional and national publications as well as spend-ing a lot of time behind a radio microphone as both a disc jockey and a talk show host. You can follow him on Twitter @GaryPooleTN

Gary PooleDavid Traver Adolphus is our resident car geek, covering all things

automotive for us on a month-ly basis. David is a freelance automotive researcher who recently quit his full-time job writing about old cars to pursue his lifelong dream of writing about old AND

new cars. David occasionally contributes to Road & Track magazine and often to road-andtrack.com and elsewhere. He is also the founder of The Road Home, a nonprofit benefitting post-9/11 veter-ans. Learn more about it on Facebook @theroadhomeusa. As far as his automotive writ-ing, he welcomes the in-evitable and probably richly deserved kvetching about Airbag and anything else on Twitter as @proscriptus.

David Traver Adolphus

— Madeline Chambliss

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Manchester quartet out to conquer the world, one country, one city, one show at a time.By Gary Poole

Manchester, England is not usually the first city in the United Kingdom that comes to mind when one thinks “music city.” London, Liverpool, Birmingham—even Glasgow have all been epicenters for various waves of musicians and bands com-ing “across the pond” to conquer America. In fact, if the average American has even heard of Manchester, it’s much more likely they’ll think of Manchester United, one of the top football clubs in the English Pre-mier League.

But don’t dismiss the city as being only a sports town. In fact, Manchester has a long and storied musical history, spawning bands as diverse as The Smiths, The Buzzcocks, The Courteeners, The Fall, Joy Division (and its successor group New Order), Oasis, Elbow, Doves, and Take That. And now, add a new name: The 1975.

The quartet, which takes the stage at Track 29 this Friday night in the midst of their first headlining tour of the United States, came to-gether in the northwest English city as teen-agers when singer Matt Healy, guitarist Adam Hann and bassist Ross MacDon hooked up with drummer George Daniel.

Right off the bat, it was very hard to pin down exactly what type of musical style they were go-ing to pursue. The band’s music drifts between brooding art rock, crisp electronica, dancefloor, rhythm & blues and ’80s gloss pop.

“I don’t think it’s confusing,” says singer Matty Healy of his band. “Feeling a lack of identity and the searching within oneself to acquire a real understanding of what you want to be, that’s something that loads of people can connect with. It’s so strange that with music people [they] want so many rules.”

If the 25 year old comes across older than his years, he has earned that road-weariness. His musical life started young when his dad’s best friend died, leaving him two guitars. And as many guitarists have discovered, there’s some-thing about the instrument that seems to in-

spire rebellion. Which didn’t bode well for his future in private school.

“I didn’t really care for being there, I got in a couple of fights,” he explains. “I got asked to leave, I never actually got expelled.”

After transitioning to public school at 14, he started drumming in a punk band with even-tual bandmates Hann and MacDonald. But he was soon to move out from behind the drum kit when he meet Daniel.

“This weird kid turned up at school. He was really tall but he looked about nine and was this odd character,” says Healy, of how he first met the eventual drummer for The 1975. “My kind of boyfriend. Well, not really, but he might as well be, we don’t really leave each others’ sides.”

The pair bonded over their dislocated child-hoods—Matt moved between London and Newcastle while George was born in Belgium and grew up in Seattle—and the sense of isola-tion they felt in their new homes in the Man-chester suburbs.

Hann had heard of a “hippie council work-er” who rented out local space for kids to play


shows, and the band formed in order to get involved. They began expand-ing their basic punk sound, adding el-ements of electronica, pop, and even some of the older British art-rock ele-ments.

Several years of clubbing and tour-ing the country, under a variety of band names, led them to two realiza-tions. One, that they were on to some-thing they felt was musically fresh, and two, that they needed to be very wary and protective of their music.

“We said ‘we’re not desperate to be famous, we’re not desperate to be in a massive band, let’s do it our way, on our terms, and make sure that our projection of ourselves is controlled by us’,” Healy notes.

They also needed to settle on a name. Though 1975 was the year The Sex Pistols formed and Talking Heads played their first gigs, the moniker has nothing to do with the date itself. Healy explains he found it in the back of a Beat-era book given to him by a “gregarious artist” he met at a yard sale in northern Majorca at the age of 19.

“He showed me round his house, it was like a ’60s bizarre haberdashery. He had photos of him with Hendrix…I thought this guy was crazy! He gave me loads of Beat Generation litera-ture, Kerouac and stuff. When I went home I read them and in the back of one of them there was all these men-tal scribblings, it was almost suicidal, and it was dated at the bottom ‘1st June, The 1975’. I was quite freaked out when I read it, the use of the word ‘The’ really stuck with me. It was the perfect band name.”

In 2011, armed with a new name and a large collection of road-tested songs, they signed with a regional label and produced the first of what would be three EPs over the following two years. Finally, in 2013, they went back into the studio to put together a full album of their best material.

“We’re weren’t making a record to support a couple of singles,” Healy says of the finished record. “On your debut album, whether you’re hyped or not, you’ve got shitloads to prove to yourself.”

And prove it they did. Their self-titled debut album entered at the top of the albums chart in the U.K. and earned rave reviews. “One immense-ly hooky debut,” said Entertainment Weekly and Billboard raved, “one of this year’s biggest breakouts.”

They’ve also proved it on the road, turning into musical world travel-ers. Since their first show in Decem-ber 2012, they have put in countless miles. The band has spent the last five months on tour taking in North America, the U.K., Ireland, Australia, New Zealand, Japan and mainland Europe. They’ve also been exposed to American audiences through tele-vised appearances on “Conan,” “Jim-my Kimmel Live!,” and “Late Night with Seth Meyers.”

So where do they go from here? “People need to get on board with what we’re doing and see that we’re for this generation. I want our music to be a part of people’s lives, proper-ly,” says Healy.

You can get on board with The 1975 this Friday night at Track 29 and see for yourself what they are all about.

“Feeling a lack of identity and the searching within oneself to acquire a real understanding of what you want to be, that’s something that

loads of people can connect with.”

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OPENING FRIDAY AT THE HUNTER MUSEUM of AMERICAN ART

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For years, I was a bad driver. I exhibited a mixture of passive-aggressive, self-righteous and just stupid fast driving that I cringe to think about. I think I’ve wrecked three cars, although I could be forgetting one, and I’m sure for a long time there was at least one serious near-miss a year or more, like swapping ends on a dirt road. Those impulses are still there beneath the surface, but the key has been learning, slowly and painfully, to con-trol them.

For many people, this is a time of year when that be-havior is hardest to control. Even if you love the holidays, they are often highly stress-ful and while you might be coping, other people prob-ably aren’t. Add in heavy and frantic shopping traffic, short days and weather for which people are never prepared, and it can become a cauldron of emotion.

I have had to work very, very hard not to be exactly

the kind of jerk I hate. I know, right? For me, it’s all about preparation.

The worst place for many people is a parking lot. It’s certainly where you see the worst driving—a mall park-ing lot on a big pre-Christmas shopping day is a display of unconcern for one’s fellows

that makes you question your place in the universe. My solution has been to short-circuit the whole

aggression-begets-aggression process. If you don’t spend 10 minutes fighting for a spot near the entrance, you can park at the back of the lot and be inside in half the time. It pays a second dividend, as it’s easier to get out—and no one’s fighting over your spot, either.

A major second technique for me, believe it or not, has been viewing the Rus-sian dash-cam videos I men-tioned last month. Go to YouTube and search for Car Crash Channel to find them. The trick is to watch a lot of

them. After a while I started recognizing what everyone was doing wrong in every in-cident, then trying to predict it. Now while I’m driving I’m constantly alert for those mistakes from both myself and other drivers, and the sorts of situations where ac-cidents are likely to happen. Not only am I driving much, much more safely, but my whole attitude is better. I see the crashes in the videos and I’m always thinking, “I don’t want to be like that,” wheth-er it’s a driver causing a crash or someone inattentive who could have avoided one. Yes, sometimes someone is going to do something really offen-sive and I could brake-check them, but is my satisfaction worth the risk and incredible hassle of not having a car? It never is.

My last major break-through has been an accep-tance that I’m going to be late sometimes. I hate being late. I think it’s the epitome of rudeness and shows an utter lack of respect for any-one you keep waiting. The problem comes when I feel as though I’m being held up by a slow driver. It enrages me, even if it just makes the eight-minute drive from my kid’s school to my office into

a ten-minute drive. Don’t they know this is a 40 MPH zone? Why are they going 30? WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU!

But I won’t speed, pass il-legally or run a yellow be-cause of it—because it’s not worth it. Part of my coping has been a rule I have for my kids, which I started after a near-disaster this summer: If they distract me, we stop. It doesn’t matter if we’re go-ing to miss Grandma’s last lucid moment on her death-bed, we’re stopping. That insistence has also made me recognize when I have a mo-ment like that myself, with-out them there. And it’s made me accept that being late isn’t the worst thing in the world. I still hate it, and will yell at the person in front of me, but from a safe distance behind.

It’s like the AA Serenity Prayer: “God grant us the se-renity to accept the things we cannot change, courage to change the things we can, and wisdom to know the dif-ference.” Inwardly, I may be still seething, but my anger doesn’t direct my actions, and as far as I’m concerned, that’s the important part. If it’s a 12-step program, then this part, where I’m a safe driver, is the first step.

Chilling Out in the Driver’s SeatWays to stay cool during hot-temper driving season

David Traver Adolphus is a freelance automotive researcher who recently quit his full time job writing about old cars to pursue his lifelong dream of writing about old AND new cars. He welcomes the inevitable and probably richly deserved kvetching about Airbag and anything else on Twitter as @proscriptus.

Air Bag

DAVID trAVer ADOlPHus

“A mall parking lot on a big pre-Christmas shopping day is a display of unconcern for one’s fellows that makes you question your place in the universe.”

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fri11.28FRIDAY LOVERS

Amber Fults & The Ambivalent LoversOne of the biggest voices and hottest bands in the city take the stage for a Friday night treat.9:30 p.m.Rhythm & Brews221 Market St.rhythm-brews.com

sat11.29PARRIS & BEER

Preston Parris Duotwo more great reasons to head downtown on saturday night: Preston Parris and lots (and lots) of tasty beer.9 p.m.World Of Beer412 Market St.worldofbeer.com

thu11.27TURkEY LEGG

Husky Burnette, James Leggtwo of chattanooga's most talented musicians take the stage for a thanksgiving Day feast.10 p.m.JJ’s Bohemia231 E. MLK Blvd.jjsbohemia.com

Keeping Up With the Joneses AgainGreat local band reunites for Turkey Day show

After you eat your weight in turkey this thursday, you’re probably going to consider spending the rest of your life sitting in some post-dinner sofa chair that’s always been there for you. But there’s no time for snoozing or tummy-rubbin’ this thanksgiving.

Wolf down that bird and say thanks because once-defunct local band up With the Joneses is back for a one-night reunion show. the event starts at 9:30 p.m. this thursday at rhythm & Brews. that gives you plenty of time to see the family, eat entirely too much, and head downtown. you’ll want to get there at the start, too, be-cause local fave Danimal Planet will be opening the show.

If you’re not familiar with up With the Joneses, the band is essentially a local star lineup of chattanooga’s rock-n-rollers. tJ Greever, Dan Pin-

son, Matt Bohannon and Adam Brown will be bringing you rock that ranges from funk to alternative to blues. everything they play puts out good vibes—just try to not smile when you listen to them. If you’ve seen up With the Joneses before, you’ve got one chance to see them play again. If you’ve never seen them, don’t miss the opportunity to see a great local band from chattanooga’s 2010 music scene.

— Zach Nicholson

Up With the Joneses, Danimal Planet9:30 p.m., Thursday, Nov. 27. Rhythm & Brews221 Market St.(423) 267-4644rhythm-brews.com

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He took a job “slingin’ springs” at a Chattanooga mattress shop and took ad-vantage of the ample downtime to write songs for his sweetheart, halfway across the world.

Within the heartfelt affection expressed in Smith’s richly evocative and warm voice, there’s a bittersweetness, as the al-bum also serves as a dedi-cation to the memory of local musician and Lamb-chop “charter member” Marc Trovillion—a.k.a. Buddie T—being one of the last al-bums on which he played before passing away one year ago from a heart attack.

The album’s title comes from a quote at-tributed to composer Claude Debussy: “I want to sing my interior landscape with the simple artlessness of a child.”

“Country music for me has always worn its heart on its sleeve,” said Smith via email. “It’s real. There’s no pretense. And I think that’s what ‘artlessness’ meant to me. Not concerned with whether it’s good or polished or smart or if people think it’s cool. It’s just there, simple and real.”

“I’m really only interested in music,

‘beautiful’ or not, that you can tell came from someone’s gut,” said Smith. “They spent something. They left something of themselves in the work. Saying something real. Something true. Even if it doesn’t

make sense.”Smith was joined by his

close friend and guitarist Matt Lewis, but the rest of his backing band came together after he noticed some drums in a custom-er’s car as he was loading

a mattress into it.“[Smith] asked if I was a musician, and

the next day we’re laying down what would come to be the first song on the upcoming album,” said guitarist and Red Crow Stu-dios owner Ross Carlson.

One thing led to another, and Carlson soon enlisted percussionist Bob Stagner (of the Shaking Ray Levis) who knew Trovil-lion, and the proceedings moved to Beech House in Nashville, under the skilled hand of respected engineer Mark Nevers.

“Things were kicked up a notch at Beech House,” said Stagner. “I like being under the gun, and it’s a beautiful piece showing some of Marc’s last music. Plus the entire

record was a love letter to Taylor’s bride-to-be, and we had to make each song as strong as possible.”

During the 18-month separation, Smith met up with his girlfriend Antonella in Ha-waii, where he popped the question; she accepted.

“Those love songs ensured the story-book ending that hopeless romantic was hoping for,” said Carlson.

When Trovillion passed away a year ago, friends, collaborators and Lambchop fans provided a flood of tributes to him. Media outlets across the world reported the news, including Rolling Stone, Spin, Pitchfork and NME, reflecting just how treasured and be-loved he was.

“I can’t say I’ve ever met anyone im-bued with such genuine kindness, talent and wisdom as Marc,” said Carlson. “With-out fail, he was the one person in Tennes-see who was always up for something fun, beautiful or adventurous at any time of the day or night.”

“I know I’m one of many people who love and miss Buddie T,” said Stagner. “I knew that anytime I picked up the phone

and called, he’d help talk me off the roof. Making music with him was as easy as talk-ing with him. He always added his soul, and you can hear it.

“Some of my happiest times were when I’d ask Marc what he was up to, and he’d say ‘I’m just here working on a custom woodwork. Last week we played the Royal Albert Hall in London,’” said Stagner. “I am really lucky to have made this record with such fine folk, and when I hear it now my heart is surrounded by light instead of being a bit broken.”

“Marc pretty much embodied what I want to be as a musician: someone who, over the years, has cultivated his gift, made great art and remained humble and hard-working until the end,” said Smith. “He was a real person, and I remember him telling me and Matt Lewis, that he loved us and he really just encouraged us to look after ourselves and keep making music and good things would happen.”

For Smith—reunited with the love of his life, and having released his new album, ripe for discovery and a breakthrough—Trovillion was right.

Artlessness: Love Story Times TwoLeafCrown’s album touches Taylor Smith’s past and present

Full food menu serving lunch and dinner. 11am-2am, 7 days a week.

35 Patten Parkway * 423.468.4192thehonestpint.com * facebook.com/TheHonestPint

honest music local and regional shows

Thu, Nov 27Sun, Nov 30

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Open 5 pm to 2 am for Thanksgiving fun!Molly Maguires [FREE]

Live Trivia every Sunday afternoon from 4-6pmRyan Oyer hosts Open Mic every Wednesday @ 8pm

$3 NEWCASTLE PINTSDURING THURSDAY SHOWS

MusicerNIe PAIK

LEAF CROWN’S NEW COUNTRY-ROCK ALBUM ARtlESS-ness (leafcrown.bandcamp.com) was written in Chattanooga and

recorded in Nashville for a woman in Australia. Flash back a few years, when Chattanooga-raised singer/songwriter Taylor Smith’s work visa in Australia fell through, forcing him to return to Tennes-see after five years, leaving behind his girlfriend of the previous year and a half.

Marc trovillion, ross carlson, Matt lewis, taylor smith and Bob stagner


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DA

RVince Gill

thursdAy11.27 Jimmy Harris7 p.m.the Palms at Hamilton6925 shallowford rd.thepalmsathamilton.comOpen Mic with Hap Henninger9 p.m.the Office @ city cafe901 carter st.(423) 634-9191 Up With the Joneses, Danimal Planet9:30 p.m.rhythm & Brews221 Market st.rhythm-brews.comHusky Burnette, James Legg10 p.m.JJ’s Bohemia231 e. MlK Blvd.jjsbohemia.com

fridAy11.28 Jason Thomas and the Mean-Eyed Cats5 p.m.chattanooga choo choo1400 Market st.choochoo.com Eddie Pontiac5:30 p.m.el Meson2204 Hamilton Place Blvd.elmesonrestaurant.comChattanooga Acoustic

Showcase7 p.m.charles & Myrtle’s coffeehouse105 McBrien rd.christunity.orgJimmy Harris7 p.m.the Palms at Hamilton6925 shallowford rd.thepalmsathamilton.com The 1975, Young Rising Sons, Cruisr8 p.m.track 291400 Market st.track29.coSouthlander8 p.m.American legion Post 81227 James Asbury ln.(423) 476-4451

Tim & Reece8 p.m.sky Zoo5709 lee Hwy.chattazooga.comLogan Murrell8:30 p.m.the Foundry1201 Broad st.chattanooganhotel.comSonic Brew8:30 p.m.VFW Post 25983370 N. Ocoee st.vfw.orgCrunk Bone Jones9 p.m.the Office @ city cafe901 carter st.(423) 634-9191Jordan Hallquist Duo9 p.m.

World Of Beer412 Market st.worldofbeer.comAmber Fults & The Ambivalent Lovers9:30 p.m.rhythm & Brews221 Market st.rhythm-brews.comCaverna, Kindora Camp, Hise, Rockfloyd10 p.m.JJ’s Bohemia231 e. MlK Blvd.jjsbohemia.comAunt Betty10 p.m.Bud’s sports Bar5751 Brainerd rd.budssportsbar.com

sAturdAy11.29 Jason Thomas and the Mean-Eyed Cats5 p.m.chattanooga choo choo1400 Market st.choochoo.comEddie Pontiac5:30 p.m.el Meson2204 Hamilton Place Blvd.elmesonrestaurant.comMocha RenaissanceBand7 p.m.Mocha restaurant & Music lounge511 Broad st.mochajazz.net

Pulse PiCk: theMolly MAguiresChattanooga's long-running Irish party band returns to the stage at The Honest Pint for a traditional after-Thanksgiving party in true Molly's style. The Molly Maguiressunday, 7 p.m.the Honest Pint35 Patten Pkwy.thehonestpint.com

LIVE MUSIC

CHATTANOOGA

NOV/DEC

12.10 DOPAPOD & TAUK 12.11 JIMMY TAWATER 12.12 SAME AS IT EVER WAS

27THU9pUP WITH THE JONESES

with DANIMAL PLANET

MUSIC OF QUEENAMBER FULTS & THE AMBIVALENT LOVERS

29SAT10pTHE BREAKFAST CLUB

80'S RETRO AND DANCE ALL NIGHT

2TUE8pUPTOWN BIG BAND

2 SINGERS, 17 PIECE BIG BAND

ANGIE APAROwith CONNOR CHRISTIAN

5FRI9:30p

ABBEY ROAD LIVE FANTASTIC BEATLES TRIBUTE BAND

6SAT10pSOUL MECHANIC

with PIGEONS PLAYING PING PONG

ALL SHOWS 21+ UNLESS OTHERWISE NOTED • NON-SMOKING VENUE

221 MARKET STREETHOT MUSIC • FINE BEER • GREAT FOOD

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COMING SOON

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RICH ROBINSON SOLO ACOUSTIC TOUR

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Dan + Shay

Jimmy Harris7 p.m.the Palms at Hamilton6925 shallowford rd.thepalmsathamilton.comRagdoll8 p.m.sky Zoo5709 lee Hwy.chattazooga.comVince Gill, Janelle Arthur8 p.m.tivoli theater709 Broad st.chattanoogaonstage.comPaul Smith and the Sky High Band8 p.m.American legion Post 81227 James Asbury ln.(423) 476-4451Logan Murrell8:30 p.m.the Foundry1201 Broad st.chattanooganhotel.comPreston Parris Duo9 p.m.World Of Beer412 Market st.worldofbeer.comAunt Betty10 p.m.Bud’s sports Bar5751 Brainerd rd.budssportsbar.comThe Breakfast Club10 p.m.rhythm & Brews221 Market st.rhythm-brews.com

Scott James Stambaugh10 p.m.the Office @ city cafe901 carter st.(423) 634-9191Hatestomp vs. The Iscariots10 p.m.JJ’s Bohemia231 e. MlK Blvd.jjsbohemia.com

sundAy11.30 Holiday Carolers1 p.m.the chattanoogan 1201 Broad st.chattanooganhotel.comSunday Night Irish Music Jam Session5 p.m.Grocery Bar1501 long st.grocerybar.comAcoustic Gospel Jam6 p.m.Brainerd united Methodist church4315 Brainerd rd.brainerdumc.orgThe Molly Maguires7 p.m.the Honest Pint35 Patten Pkwy.thehonestpint.com

MondAy12.1 Rhythm Ballroom Dance6 p.m.

the Ballroom at Hixson7001 Middle Valley rd.theballroomathixson.com Monday Nite Big Band 7 p.m.the Palms at Hamilton6925 shallowford rd.thepalmsathamilton.com

tuesdAy12.2 Rick’s Blues Jam7 p.m.Folk school of chattanooga1200 Mountain creek rd.chattanoogafolk.comTim Starnes, Davey Smith7 p.m.sugar’s Downtown507 Broad st.sugarschattanooga.comChattanooga State Concert Choir7:30 p.m.chattanooga state community college4501 Amnicola Hwy.chattanoogastate.eduLee University Wind Ensemble7:30 p.m.lee university conn center1053 church st. Neleeuniversity.eduUptown Big Band8 p.m.rhythm & Brews221 Market st.rhythm-brews.com

wednesdAy12.3 Eddie Pontiac5:30 p.m.el Meson248 Northgate Parkelmesonrestaurant.comDan + Shay7 p.m.track 291400 Market st.track29.coJimmy Harris7 p.m.the Palms at Hamilton6925 shallowford rd.thepalmsathamilton.comDan Sheffield7:30 p.m.sugar’s Downtown507 Broad st.sugarschattanooga.comAngie Aparo, Connor Christian9:30 p.m.rhythm & Brews221 Market st.rhythm-brews.comE Rex, Dr. Steam, Subsurgence, Spoon, Churrin10 p.m.JJ’s Bohemia231 e .MlK Blvd.jjsbohemia.com

Join us on Facebook

All shows are free with dinner or 2 drinks!Stop by & check out our daily specials!

Happy Hour: Mon-Fri: 4-7pm$1 10oz drafts, $3 32oz drafts,

$2 Wells, $1.50 Domestics, Free Appetizers

901 Carter StInside City Cafe423-634-9191

Thursday, November 27: 9pmOpen Mic

with Hap HenningerFriday, November 28: 9pm

Crunk Bone JonesSaturday, November 29: 10pm

Scott James StambaughTuesday, December 2: 7pmServer/Hotel Appreciation Night$5 Pitchers ● $2 Wells ● $1.50 Domestics

We Are Saving Mobile Lives

1906 Gunbarrel Rd.423-486-1668

(Next to GiGi’s Cupcakes)

5425 Highway 153423-805-4640(Next to CiCi’s Pizza)

cellphonerepair.com/chattanooga

Map these locations on chatta-noogapulse.com. Send event list-ings at least 10 days in advance to: [email protected]


Record ReviewsZACH NICHOLSON

Apex of Synergy, Haunting AmericanaCirca Survive evolves, Rye Baby gets simple

Circa Survive released their new album Descensus

on Nov. 24. Their last album, Violent Waves, was released independently, so when Circa Survive signed to Sumerian Re-cords, I was very excited to see what they would produce. And these guys have totally blown me away. Descensus sounds much closer to the older albums On Letting Go and Blue Sky Noise. The instrumentals are generally heavier and catchier, and less ethereal than Violent Waves.

Every song on the album is fantastic. The first track and single “Schema” is a heavy-hitting, fast-paced call to ac-tion. It’s a song that you sweat to. The drums and bass sync up and drive the rhythm while the guitars add layers of depth and body. I said the album was less ethereal than Violent Waves, but that doesn’t mean Circa Survive’s signature soundscape guitars aren’t here. Rather, I mean that the instruments are focused and every note is precise and purposeful. Ev-

erything builds on itself. De-scensus is the apex of synergy between Circa Survive’s mem-bers.

And I haven’t even men-tioned Anthony Green’s vocals. Just like the instruments, the vocal melodies are more tightly composed. Anthony ranges from high-pitched angelic to outright screaming, and it’s all spot on.

The tracks “Child of the Desert” and “Only the Sun” are album high points, if I had to choose. Both songs are catchy and aggressive. “Child of the Desert” starts with a drum-driven 5/4 beat. Bass grooves under the beat while guitars bounce and reverberate on top. Green’s vocals float around and pull you in with chorus harmo-nies. Then the end explodes into a heavy 3/4 beat reminis-cent of psych-stoner rock.

Then we have “Only the Sun,” which sits on a dark, funky 3/4 beat. The bass slides up and down, hardly sounding like a bass guitar at all. Reverb stacks on the guitar and Green’s

vocals swell and swoon. And three minutes into the song, it hits. The song goes halftime, Green’s vocals overlap with multiple lyrics…everything cli-maxes and drops quiet.

Two other songs were sur-prises on the album. “Phan-tom” is an electro-centric song with light and quick funk drumming. The song is soft and eerie, not exactly a rock song, but beautifully written. The minute-long interlude “Who Will Lay With Me Now” is similar, but is too short to get a good feel from it.

So—please go listen to this album. Circa Survive’s sound is unique and ever-evolving, and Descensus is the perfect start-ing point for falling in love with this band.

Local music duo Rye Baby is in the process of releas-

ing their new album Cowboy Chords. Currently being re-leased one song at a time on Bandcamp, Cowboy Chords is a work-in-progress that I’m very excited to see complete.

Rye Baby embraces creating music with just two people. Their music is spaced out, with instrumentation fit for two mu-sicians. This sparse instrumen-tation really forces the vocals to the front.

And the best part of Rye Baby is found in the voices of Jennifer Brumlow and Callie Harmon. The two voices really pair well together, with Brum-low singing mostly in the front and Harmon supporting with harmonies and counterpoints. Brumlow’s vocal style is hard to describe—she croons and shrieks, whispers and reverber-ates. The way she both controls her voice and sends it flying is mesmerizing. Then you have Harmon with the deeper, root-ed harmonies and slow vibrato.

Because Rye Baby is a duo, the bandmates have to be ex-perienced with multiple in-struments. Of course, they both can sing wonderfully. But Brumlow and Harmon are also well versed in different instru-ments. On Cowboy Chords, Brumlow is listed as playing “guitar, mandolin, banjo, me-lodica, [and] percussion,” and Harmon, “guitar, mandolin, banjo, lap steel, [and] percus-sion.” And even though the two musicians play all these instruments, they forego over-dubbing huge orchestrations that would include all their tal-ent, and choose to record what could be played live between just the two of them. I like that.

Rye Baby gets at something simple with Cowboy Chords, and it feels good. These are songs that can be listened to any time in any situation. Rye Baby channels the folk-y Amer-icana spirit into music that is at once soothing and haunting, familiar and strange. So far, Cowboy Chords is five tracks long, but I hope to see more re-cordings in the near future from these two. Because five songs just isn’t enough.

Circa SurviveDescensus(Sumerian Records)

Rye BabyCowboy Chords(Independent)

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chaTTanoogaPulse.com • hOlIDay ShOPPING GUIDE • NOVEMBER 27, 2014 • The Pulse • 15

Holiday

holiday gift ideas from around the city

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The original concept of a "table topic" was to help people become comfortable with public speaking, by giving them a card with a topic that they had to speak about for two minutes. But instead of making this all about business, Table Topics has created a wide range of topic cubes for the perfect party game or ice breaker. tabletopics.com

Ever wanted to print out the great photo you just took on your smartphone? With a Pringo Portable Printer it's a snap. For both IOS and Android phones. And it's WiFi-based instead of Bluetooth.pringo.hiti.com

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Having aged to perfection for over six years in 53-gallon American White Oak barrels, chattanooga Whiskey asked Master Distiller Larry Ebersold to select ten of the best barrels from their barrelhouse for this limited edition Barrel Select whiskey. Only available in select stores in Chattanooga. Look for the colored neck labels. chattanoogawhiskey.com

16 • The Pulse • NOVEMBER 27, 2014 • hOlIDay ShOPPING GUIDE • chaTTanoogaPulse.com

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way through the light show, be sure to visit santa’s Village, where all pro-ceeds go to the east Ridge Fire and Police needy child Fund. santa is there, of course, and there are many activities for chil-dren and adults alike to choose from.

children have the op-portunity to write a letter to santa, make christmas tree ornaments, play on inflatables, and take a pic-ture with santa. King add-ed, “The kids can make reindeer food, too. Then, on christmas eve, they can sprinkle it in their yard for santa’s reindeer.”

another highlight of santa’s village is a pet adoption table run by east Ridge animal shel-ter. children and their parents can visit the table

to see pictures of various animals up for adoption.

Directly outside santa’s Village, there is a conces-sion stand offering every-thing from funnel cakes to corndogs. There is also a fire pit for roasting marshmallows and mak-ing s’mores.

“It’s fun for the whole family,” said King. “From 8-year-olds to 80-year-olds, there’s something for everyone to enjoy.”

no matter what the weather is, christmas nights of lights will re-main open. “Rain or shine, cold or hot, you can come to the show,” emphasized

King. and don’t worry about get-ting cold during your visit to san-ta’s Village—it is inside a climate-controlled pavil-ion.

King noted that the light show

looks better when there is a little bit of rain: “When it’s raining, the wet as-phalt reflects the lights, so it’s actually prettier with wet roads than with dry roads.”

Barring “a huge snow-storm or a power failure,” both of which are unlikely, the christmas nights of lights at camp Jordan Park in east Ridge is open every night through Janu-ary 3, including Thanks-giving, christmas eve, and christmas Day.

Be sure to stop by with your family and friends to get into the christmas spirit!

Camp Jordan Lights Up For the HolidaysChristmas Night of Lights is drive-through celebration

This holiday season, treat your-self and your family to a drive-through christmas light show at camp Jordan Park in east Ridge. With hundreds of thousands of lights synchronized to christ-mas music, christmas nights of lights does not disappoint.

The drive-through show is about a mile and a half long. Richie King—who runs the light show along with his wife and his broth-er—explained, “Typically, people will stay 30 to 45 minutes, but you can drive through the show at your own pace.”

extended viewing time is en-couraged. “I’ve seen people bring pizzas,” King said, “and they’ll sit and watch the show. If you want to watch one section for a while, all you have to do is pull your car to the side so that the people who want to keep moving, can.”

When asked how many christ-mas light bulbs were used to cre-ate the show, King laughed and revealed, “We tried to count them one time, but we quit. Basically, there are hundreds of thousands of lights driven by over one thou-sand computer channels, and all

of it is synchronized to mu-sic you can listen to on your car radio.”

The Kings have been in the light show business for about five years now. They are currently running an-other show in mobile, al, and past shows have been in nashville and myrtle

Beach.admis-

sion to the light show var-ies based

on the number of people in the car. For a car of one to four passengers, admission is $6 per passenger. For a car of five to nine passen-gers, admission is $25 for the entire vehicle. children ages 3 and under are admit-ted free.

There are also coupons available from the salvation army and the chattanooga area Food Bank. If you bring one of these coupons, you can get $2 off the admis-sion price per car, and part of the proceeds from your admission will go back to those organizations.

after you have made your

Business Beat

rAcHAel POe “After you have made your way through the light show,

be sure to visit Santa’s Village, where all proceeds

go to the East Ridge Fire and Police Needy Child Fund.”

Christmas Nights of LightsThrough January 3Camp Jordan Park

323 Camp Jordan Pkwy, East Ridgechristmasnightsoflights.com


Copyright © 2014 Jonesin’ Crosswords. For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+ to call. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle No. 0703

ACROSS1 Doing OK on the golf course6 Stinging creatures11 Basic shelter14 Get moving15 Calm, as fears16 “Achtung Baby” co-producer Brian17 Acted like a human18 Tae kwon do move20 It drives Persians crazy22 “Enough already!”23 Where Gilligan ended up24 Small buzzer26 Like Russian matryoshka dolls28 Breakfast noisemakers33 Epps of “Resurrection”34 Inspiron maker35 Jane of “Glee”39 “Iron Man” Ripken40 Tile arrangements42 It may be golden43 Clue weapon

45 Jimmy Carter’s alma mater, for short46 “Strange ___”47 Bus driver of classic TV50 Gangster called Scarface53 Inflatable pilot in “Airplane!”54 Dry55 Shop-___58 Part of USSR62 Indie band formed by actress Jenny Lewis65 ___ Wafers66 He was Jim in “The Doors”67 Chopin exercise68 Former “The Voice” judge Green69 Chicago trains70 Big Apple NL player, for short71 “Melrose Place” actor Rob

DOWN1 One of Stephen Baldwin’s brothers

2 Prefix with byte or flop3 Role4 Iron Man or Thor5 Corrections are made in it6 Card game for two7 “Thanks ___!”8 Dickensian setting9 Sandwich made with a press10 Barrett once of Pink Floyd11 Bank caper12 Family man?13 Took a legal puff, in some states19 Like smoochy faces21 Late “SNL” announcer Don25 Snarls, like traffic27 “Electric” creatures28 “I got a ___” (Charlie Brown’s Halloween line)29 Bowie’s single-named wife30 “Going Back to ___” (LL Cool J single)31 Axl’s bandmate32 “The Price Is

Right” game36 Revenge getter of film37 Canadian Plains tribe38 Kate Hudson’s mom Goldie40 Intend41 Food ___ : Portland, Oregon :: Food trucks : other cities44 Role for Elijah46 Low-budget flicks48 Giddiness49 Instantly50 Do a Thanksgiving job51 Popular font52 Pharmacy inventory56 Grad57 Formally hand over59 Westlife’s “If ___ You Go”60 Cosmopolitan competitor61 Art colony of the Southwest63 Barbie’s significant other64 “Still...”

Jonesin’ Crossword MATT jONES


sat11.29"CLASSIC" FILM?

Mise En Scenesters Present: “Crime Wave”Overlooked film classic.8:30 p.m.Barking Legs Theater1307 Dodds Ave.(423) 624-5347barkinglegs.org

sun11.30HOLIDAY FUN

Holiday Carolers at The ChattanooganFa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.1 p.m.The Chattanoogan1201 Broad St.(423) 424-3700chattanooganhotel.com

fri11.28ART SHOPPING

Artist’s Open Housecome meet the artists and get some great deals.10 a.m.River Gallery400 E. Second St.(800) 374-2923river-gallery.com

The Art of the F-StopNew exhibit at Hunter showcases top photography

On Friday, a new exhibit featur-ing photography from the New York Times Magazine opens at the Hunt-er. For over 30 years, the magazine has featured a wide variety of photo-graphic work, with everything from photojournalism to fashion to por-traiture. this exhibit focuses primar-ily on notable projects from the last 15 years.

Materials from different stages of the magazine’s commissioning process—such as storyboards, shot lists, videos, tear sheets and framed prints—will be on display, revealing the collaboration necessary to trans-form an idea into a finished layout.

the magazine provides a rare op-portunity for printed visual story-telling and encourages crossover between artistic disciplines. As New York Times Magazine Photo editor Kathy ryan explained, the publica-

tion “is often at its best when we bring photographers to projects that fall outside their usual borders.” the exhibit will feature 35 artists from across the globe, including sebas-tião salgado, Gregory crewdson and ryan McGinley.

the exhibit will be on view through March 22. General admission is $9.95 for adults and $4.95 for children over 3 years old. If you plan to visit the Hunter on the next Free First sunday, be aware that a $5 admission will be required to view this particular ex-hibit.

— Rachael Poe

“New York Times Magazine Photography Exhibit”Hunter Museum of American Art10 Bluff View(423) 267-0968huntermuseum.org

AR

TS

SCE

NE

NUTCRACKERThe

presentsGuest Artists:

Frederick Davis Dance theater of Harlem

Brian GephartMenlowe Ballet

Featuring the Chattanooga

Boy’s Choir

Tickets On Sale DECEMBER 1st

Proudly Presents…

Saturday, November 16, 2013 � 6:30pm to 11:00pmSilver Ballroom, Sheraton Read House

Gourmet Seated Dinner � Dancing � WineCash Bar � Live & Silent Auction � Semi-formal Attire

For more information: www.BalletTennessee.orgEmail Anna VanCura: [email protected]

To make a reservation:(423) 821-2055 FAX: (423) 821-2156

Special Legacy Honorees include Mayor Andy Berke & Julia Sanford.

YOUTH & FAMILYDEVELOPMENT

Hardaway Designs www.hardawaydesign.com

UTCRACKERNThe

presents

DECEMBER 20, 7:30 PM • DECEMBER 21, 2:00 PM • DECEMBER 22, 2:00 PMHayes Concert Hall • UTC Fine Arts CenterBoxOffice: 423-425-4269 • www.utc.edu/finearts

For more information: www.BalletTennessee.orgTickets On Sale: DECEMBER 2nd

DECEMBER 19, 7:30 pm • DECEMBER 20, 2:00 pmDECEMBER 21, 2:00pm • UTC Fine Arts Center

423-425-4269 • www.utc.edu/finearts


He has a wonderful softness and ease of character that often works in direct opposition to the material he presents in his art form, making him both him enigmatic and memorable. His delivery is confident, clear and di-rect, and has a warmth that instantly draws his audience to him.

“Off the stage, I am so shy,” Ellsworth says with a chuckle. This seems strange coming from a person who so often stands in front of audiences, includ-ing the monthly Wide Open Floor event at Barking Legs Theater, which he hosts. Created in 2011 by Angela Sweet, Wide Open Floor has played host to any and all artists looking for a home to share their art with a willing and receptive audience.

“I loved it so much,” says Ellsworth, “I loved the feel of it, the freedom of it, because it was an uncensored show.” He says that, as a spoken-word artist, he found that he was often asked by other venues to shy away from topics that were too political or controversial, which strangled his per-formance, or was not able to secure gigs at all. But at Wide Open Floor, Ellsworth says, “it was this feeling of ‘You can say and do whatever,’ and in a supportive atmosphere. If you have something to express, express it.”

He says that Wide Open Floor felt like a safe space to open up and share art, “because you knew you weren’t going to be criticized for it. And if you got feedback, you were getting feed-

back from mostly other artists, so it’s also really helpful.” Ellsworth believes that this is one of the great draws of Wide Open Floor: a chance to connect

with other artists, both in similar and alterna-tive mediums.

Wide Open Floor re-turned in November, after a hiatus due to the remodeling of Barking

Legs, during which time Ellsworth, Sweet and Derek Williams began dis-cussing new directions for Wide Open Floor, and decided that continuing to grow the sense of community would be an important part. The revamped show is shorter, with only 10 perfor-mances, the theme of each month’s show creating minor challenges for the artists to work around, such as bare bones technology or a single, un-moving spotlight. The idea has always been to offer a space for artists to take risks and showcase their work and, Ellsworth says, “We still want that sense of openness; anything can come through the door; anything can hap-pen, but we want to focus in this itera-tion more on challenging the artists.” In creating these small obstacles, the artists are challenged to “Be creative! It’s the nature of what we all do,” he says, “and if some of those elements pose a challenge for you and you feel like you don’t have a skill set of your own, reach out to one of the other art-

ists who are floating around the show.”In the spirit of that collaboration

and sense of community, the short-ened time frame also allows for a “talk-back” with the audience at the end of the show. This is a time for art-ists to answer questions about their art and inspirations, as well as an opportu-nity for more people to connect. “One of the things that’s been happening sort of unintentionally and what we want to happen, is that we have artists meeting each other and talking about the work and collaborating. So, now we can provide a space and a time for people to actively do that,” he says.

Ellsworth is proud of the commu-nity that Wide Open Floor has built and says they are like family, but they are always excited to welcome new faces into the fold, whether as per-formers or audience members. “We are a collective,” he says, and now that Barking Legs has reopened and Wide Open Floor is back, “It’s so good to be home.”

Wide Open Floor is the first Friday of every month at 8 p.m. at Barking Legs Theater, 1307 Dodds Ave. Ad-mission is $5 and there are conces-sions at the venue.

the next Wide Open Floor event is Dec. 5. barkinglegs.org

Hit the Floor Wide OpenRevamped Wide Open Floor format challenges and supports

ArtsHAyley GrAHAM

MARCUS ELLSWORTH COMMANDS AT-tention the moment he walks into a room. He

is not bombastic or over-the-top, but when he steps forward and speaks, you listen. It’s a talent that has become his passion, sharing his thoughts through spoken word poetry.

Marcus ellsworthPhoto by l. Anastasia Holmes

RUTH HOLMBERGARTS LEADERSHIP

AWARD 2015

Nominate someone today

for the most prestigious

arts award in Chattanooga.

The Ruth Holmberg Arts Leadership Award

recognizes an individual who has made significant

contributions to the arts in Chattanooga and who

is actively engaged is actively engaged in the cultural life of our

community.

To submit your nomination, visit

www.artsbuild.com or email [email protected].


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thursdAy11.27 15th Annual Grateful Gobbler Walk8 a.m.coolidge Park1 river st.(423) 847-5844gratefulgobblerwalk.orgThanksgiving Dinner CruiseNoonsouthern Belle riverboat201 riverfront Pkwy.(423) 266-4488chattanoogariverboat.comHomeschool Science Club1 p.m.creative Discovery Museum321 chestnut st.(423) 757-2143cdmfun.orgOoltewah Farmers Market3 p.m.Ooltewah Nursery & landscape co.5829 Main st.(423) 238-9775ooltewahnursery.com

fridAy11.28 Artist’s Open House10 a.m.river Gallery400 e. second st.(800) 374-2923

river-gallery.com“New York Times Magazine Photography:” Exhibit Opening10 a.m.Hunter Museum of American Art10 Bluff View(423) 267-0968huntermuseum.orgLighted Boat Parade & Ice on the Landing7 p.m.ross’s landing Park100 riverfront Pkwy.(423) 265-0071chattanoogapresents.comLandry7:30, 9:45 p.m.the comedy catch3224 Brainerd rd.(423) 629-2233

thecomedycatch.com

sAturdAy11.29 The Barn Nursery Christmas Festival 20149 a.m.the Barn Nursery1801 east 24th st. Place(423) 698-2276barnnursery.comBreakfast with Santa9 a.m.the chattanoogan1201 s. Broad st.(423) 424-3700chattanooganhotel.comBrainerd Farmers’ Market10 a.m.Grace episcopal church 20 Belvoir Ave.

(423) 698-0330St. Alban’s Hixson Farmers’ Market9:30 a.m.st. Alban’s episcopal church7514 Hixson Pike(423) 842-1342Gingerbread Workshops12:30 p.m.creative Discovery Museum321 chestnut st.(423) 756-2738cdmfun.orgChristmas Special Dinner Train5:30 p.m.tennessee Valley railroad4119 cromwell rd.(423) 894-8028tvrail.comLandry7:30, 9:45 p.m.the comedy catch3224 Brainerd rd.(423) 629-2233thecomedycatch.comMise En Scenesters Present: “Crime Wave”8:30 p.m.Barking legs theater1307 Dodds Ave.(423) 624-5347barkinglegs.org

sundAy11.30 The Barn Nursery Christmas Festival 2014

Pulse PiCk: lAndryLandry is a Canadian-born interracial love child whose hybrid existence, when mixed with a little dysfunction, makes for a fantastic recipe of comedy goulash.

Landrythe comedy catch3224 Brainerd rd.(423) 629-2233thecomedycatch.com

for more info call 706.820.2531

See .comRockCity

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Gingerbread Workshops

10 a.m.the Barn Nursery1801 east 24th st. Place(423) 698-2276barnnursery.com Holiday Carolers at The Chattanoogan1 p.m.the chattanoogan1201 Broad st.(423) 424-3700chattanooganhotel.comChristmas Carol Dinner Cruise6:30 p.m.southern Belle riverboat201 riverfront Pkwy.(423) 266-4488chattanoogariverboat.comLandry7:30 p.m.the comedy catch3224 Brainerd rd.(423) 629-2233thecomedycatch.com

MondAy12.1 Tweentastic: Film Group4 p.m.Northgate library278 Northgate Mall Dr.(423) 870-0635chattlibrary.orgKids Lego Club5:10 p.m.Downtown library1001 Broad st.(423) 757-5310chattlibrary.org

tuesdAy12.2 Beginning Readers Book Club4 p.m.Northgate library278 Northgate Mall Dr.(423) 870-0635chattlibrary.orgChattanooga WordPress Meetup5:30 p.m.Downtown library1001 Broad st.(423) 757-5310chattlibrary.org

wednesdAy12.3 Main Street Farmers Market4 p.m.325 e. Main st.mainstfarmersmarket.comCommunity Yoga Benefiting Chattanooga Young Artistic Network5:30 p.m.thrive studio191 river st.(423) 800-0676thrivestudio.net

ongoing

“Breakdown Lane Orrery”cress Gallery of Art736 Vine st.(423) 425-4371

cressgallery.org“Folk Art Show”reflections Gallery6922 lee Hwy.(423) 892-3072reflectionsgallerytn.com“Member’s Choice”Gallery at Blackwell71 eastgate loop(423) 344-5643chattanoogaphoto.org“New York Times Magazine Photography Exhibit”10 a.m.Hunter Museum of American Art10 Bluff View(423) 267-0968huntermuseum.org“Open 24 Hours” Hunter Museum of American Art10 Bluff View(423) 267-0968huntermuseum.org “Ephemeral Forms: Works by Shadow May”AVA Gallery30 Frazier Ave.(423) 265-4282averts.org“Art Begins at 40”In-town Gallery26A Frazier Ave.(423) 267-9214“PRINT”Jewish cultural center5461 N. terrace rd.(423) 493-0270jewishchattanooga.com“Self-Reflection”

river Gallery400 e. second st.(800) 374-2923river-gallery.com“The Polar Express” in 3D IMAXtennessee Aquarium IMAX theatre1 Broad st.(423) 262-0695tnaqua.org“The Threads That Bind”Bessie smith cultural center200 Martin luther King Boulevard(423) 266-8658bessiesmithcc.orgZuri Quilting Guild ExhibitionBessie smith cultural center200 Martin luther King Boulevard(423) 266-8658bessiesmithcc.orgZIPstream Aerial Adventuresruby Falls1720 south scenic Hwy.(423) 821-2544rubyfalls.comChattanooga Ghost Tours the little curiosity shoppe138 Market st.chattanoogaghosttours.com

Named “One of the Ten Most Incredible Cave Waterfalls on Earth”

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RubyFallsZip.comMap these locations on chatta-noogapulse.com. Send event list-ings at least 10 days in advance to: [email protected]


They say, “An apple a day keeps the doctor away.” With the cold and flu season com-ing into full swing, I’m not re-ally sure it’s such a grand plan to go it alone with just a piece of fruit that’s usually reserved for still-life paintings and as a target to shoot on people’s heads. I would advise con-sulting a qual-ified physician at the local neighborhood dis-count pharmacy and Photomat. Nevertheless, that’s what they say, and just to be on the safe side I’ll abide…in my own way. That said; let’s get to the core of the situation.

The spirits world has been going berserk over flavored vodkas lately. There’s every-thing from cotton candy to sriracha out there. You can’t blink an eye without glimps-ing a brightly colored martini glass full of fluorescent jive. So it was only a matter of time before the rest of the indus-try began catching up with the hype. The whiskey genre hasn’t been neglected in the least. But it’s been lagging in

the variety department. I’ve taste tested many, many of the flavored whiskeys over the last couple of years and most of them leave me quite satisfied. Luckily, none of them have been candy corn with sprinkles and gummy bears served out of

peanut butter cups. I tend to stick more to the clas-sics when I go brown.

That’s why I’m pleased that the folks up at Lake Winnipeg, in Manitoba have been busy out in the orchards this year. Just in time for the holidays, Crown Royal Canadian Whis-ky has blended its legendary rye and corn product with Re-gal Gala apples and hints of spice to create a 70-proof win-ner that’s sure to look right at home next to the fireplace this season.

Like the traditional Crown, it’s already gift-wrapped in a felt bag. But this time it’s a deep forest green instead of the usual Prince and The Revolution purple. So if you hurry, you can save up enough of them to stitch up a nice elf

outfit in time for Christmas.The other day, I sat down

and had a conversation with a tipple of Crown’s Regal Apple and was pleasantly taken by what it had to say. It’s rather tart at first. There’s a very crispy and refreshing candy-apple tone to the top of the tongue. It then finishes with a slightly sweet caramel taste that’s warm and soothing. It was perfectly steady on its own feet with just an ice cube slid-ing around in the tumbler.

But I know that different strokes are for different folks. So, I wrangled some guinea pigs, put on a Burl Ives record, filled a bowl with cashews and opened the bar to let them go at it.

The classic “Washington Ap-ple Shot” is a perfect marriage for this whiskey. It consists of

Crown Royal Regal Apple, Apple Schnapps and a splash of cranberry juice. It’s a tad sharp. But I put a splash of 7-Up over it and it laid right out.

“The Candy Apple” really hits the spot with Crown Roy-al Regal Apple and a dose of Crown Royal Maple Finished whisky. Just give them a shake over ice, pour these in a glass and let them do the rest. We thought it would be really good topped with Horchata. But I was fresh out.

Lastly, “The Big Apple” is Crown Royal Regal Apple with a little sweet vermouth and a dash of angostura bitters. It’s basically a Manhattan—hence the name. So, you can put a cherry in it if you simply can’t resist and that will be just fine.

How do you like them ap-ples? Cheers!

Mike Dobbs writes about all things liquor. When not relaxing at home with his Tonkinese kitten Amélie, he’s an architectural designer by trade. A night owl since birth, he’s honed the craft of bacchanalian roister and developed an appreciation for the finer elixirs of life.

“Crown Royal Canadian Whisky has blended its legendary rye and corn product with Regal Gala apples and hints of spice to create a 70-proof winner.”

Spirits Within

MIKe DOBBs

An Apple Whiskey A Day…Our man on the bar stool whips up Crown Royal recipes for holiday health

ATHENS DISTRIBUTING COMPANYWINE AND SPIRIT WHOLESALERS

Locally owned since 1961

Visit our website: Athensdistributing.comFollow us on Facebook

Athens Distributing Company ChattanoogaFollow us on Twitter

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Crown RoyalThis legendary whisky, created in 1939 to celebrate the visit of the King of England, has a blend of fifty distinct, full-bodied whiskies matured in white oak barrels.

Athens Distributing recommends these fine spirits...Crown Royal Black

An extraordinary addition to the Crown Royal portfolio, Crown Royal Regal Apple is a blend of their hand-selected smooth whiskies infused with natural apple flavors.

Crown Royal Reserve

A bolder, darker and more robust whisky blended at 90 proof, yet with the signature smoothness of Crown Royal. It has a deeper oak background with sweet, maple notes and a light vanilla finish.

Crown Royal’s Master Whisky Blender, Andrew MacKay, hand selected the whiskies with the body and taste that were necessary for achieving the exceptional depth of Crown Royal Reserve.

Crown Royal Regal Apple


SaGITTaRIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Galileo Galilei (1564-1642) was an Italian astronomer, physi-cist, and mathematician who is sometimes called “the father of modern science.” He expressed his innovative ideas so vigorously that he offended the Catholic Church, which convicted him of heresy. For us today, he symbol-izes the magnificence of rational thought. And yet Galileo also had a weird streak. For example, he gave lectures on the “Shape, Location, and Size of Dante’s Inferno,” ana-lyzing the poet’s depiction of hell. In the course of these meticulous discourses, Galileo concluded that Satan was more than four-fifths of a mile tall. In this spirit, Sagittarius, and in accordance with current as-trological omens, you are tempo-rarily authorized to de-emphasize the constraints of reason and logic so that you may gleefully and un-apologetically pursue your quirky proclivities.

caPRIcORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): While in his early twenties, actor Robert Downey Jr. appeared in the films Less Than Zero and Weird Science. That got him semi-type-cast as a member of Hollywood’s Brat Pack, a group of popular young actors and actresses who starred in coming-of-age films in the 1980s. Eager to be free of that pigeonhole, Downey performed a ritual in 1991: He dug a hole in his backyard and buried the clothes he had worn in Less Than Zero. I recommend that you carry out a comparable ceremony to help you graduate from the parts of your past that are holding you back.

aQUaRIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): In her book Revolution from Within, Gloria Steinem offers a challenge: “Think of the times you have said: ‘I can’t write,’ ‘I can’t paint,’ ‘I can’t run,’ ‘I can’t shout,’ ‘I can’t dance,’ ‘I can’t sing.’” That’s your first assignment, Aquarius: Think of those times. Your second as-signment is to write down other “I can’t” statements you have made over the years. Assignment three is to objectively evaluate whether any of these “I can’t” statements are literally true. If you find that some of them are not literally true, your fourth assignment is to actual-ly do them. The coming weeks will be a favorable time to transform “I can’t” into “I can.”

PIScES (Feb. 19-March 20): “Dogs don’t know where they be-gin and end,” writes Ursula K. Le Guin in her book The Wave in the Mind. They “don’t notice when they put their paws in the quiche.” Cats are different, LeGuin contin-ues. They “know exactly where they begin and end. When they walk slowly out the door that you are holding open for them, and pause, leaving their tail just an inch or two inside the door, they know it. They know you have to keep

holding the door open…It’s a cat’s way of maintaining relationship.” Whether you are more of a dog per-son or a cat person, Pisces, it is very important that you be more like a cat than a dog in the coming weeks. You must keep uppermost in your mind exactly where you begin and where you end.

aRIES (March 21-April 19): What exactly do you believe in, Aries? What’s your philosophy of life? Do you think that most people are ba-sically good and that you can make a meaningful life for yourself if you just work hard and act kind? Do you believe that evil, shapeshift-ing, kitten-eating extraterrestrials have taken on human form and are impersonating political leaders who control our society? Are you like the character Crash Davis in the film Bull Durham, who be-lieved in “high fiber, good scotch, the sweet spot, and long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days”? Now would be an excellent time for you to get very clear about the fundamental principles that guide your behavior. Re-commit yourself to your root beliefs—and jettison the beliefs that no longer work for you.

TaURUS (April 20-May 20): I have two encyclopedias of dreams, and they disagree on the symbolic meaning of mud. One book says that when you dream of mud, you may be facing a murky moral dilemma in your waking life, or are perhaps dealing with a messy temptation that threatens to com-promise your integrity. The other encyclopedia suggests that when you dream of mud, it means you have received an untidy but fertile opportunity that will incite growth and creativity. I suspect that you have been dreaming of mud lately, Taurus, and that both meanings ap-ply to you.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Are there certain influences you would love to bring into your life, but you can’t figure out how? Do you fan-tasize about getting access to new resources that would make every-thing better for you, but they seem to be forever out of reach? If you answered “yes,” it’s time to stop moping. I’m happy to report that you have more power than usual to reel in those desirable influences and resources. To fully capitalize on this power, be confident that you can attract what you need.

caNcER (June 21-July 22): Should you cut back and retrench? Definitely. Should you lop off and bastardize? Definitely not. Do I recommend that you spend time editing and purifying? Yes, please. Does this mean you should censor and repress? No, thank you. Here’s my third pair of questions: Will you be wise enough to shed some of your defense mechanisms and strip away one of your lame excuses? I

hope so. Should you therefore dis-pense with all of your psychic pro-tections and leave yourself vulner-able to being abused? I hope not.

lEO (July 23-Aug. 22): I know you’re beautiful and you know you’re beautiful. But I think you could be even more beautiful than you already are. What do you think? Have you reached the limits of how beautiful you can be? Or will you consider the possibility that there is even more beauty lying dormant within you, ready to be groomed and expressed? I encourage you to ruminate on these questions: 1. Are you hiding a complicated part of your beauty because it would be hard work to liberate it? 2. Are you afraid of some aspect of your beau-ty because revealing it would force you to acknowledge truths about yourself that are at odds with your self-image? 3. Are you worried that expressing your full beauty would intimidate other people?

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Helsin-ki, Finland is growing downwards. By cutting out space in the bedrock below the city’s surface, farseeing leaders have made room to build shops, a data center, a hockey rink, a church, and a swimming pool. There are also projects underway to construct 200 other underground structures. I’d like to see you start working along those lines, Virgo—at least metaphorically. Now would be an excellent time to renovate your foundations so as to accom-modate your future growth.

lIBRa (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): The Pantone Color Matching System presents a structured approach to identifying colors. It’s used as a standard in the printing industry. According to its system of classifi-cation, there are 104 various shades of grey. I suspect you will benefit from being equally discerning in the coming weeks. It just won’t be possible to differentiate between the good guys and the bad guys. You’ll misunderstand situations that you try to simplify, and you’ll be brilliant if you assume there’s al-ways more nuance and complexity to uncover. Don’t just grudgingly tolerate ambiguity, Libra. Appreci-ate it. Learn from it.

ScORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): I am not necessarily predicting that you will acquire a shiny new asset in time for the solstice. Nor am I glibly optimistic that you will get a raise in pay or an unexpected bo-nus. And I can offer only a 65-per-cent certainty that you will snag a new perk or catch a financial break or stumble upon a treasure. In general, though, I am pretty con-fident that your net worth will rise in the next four weeks. Your luck will be unusually practical. To take maximum advantage of the cos-mic tendencies, focus your efforts on the one or two most promising prospects.

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trust the Mise en scenesters, “chat-tanooga’s Pop-up Arthouse theater” to offer a screening of what they describe as “one of the most criminally underseen films of the 1980s.” And just in time to help you recover from your post-thanks-giving pig-out trance!

According to Mes, “this canadian cult oddity [is] an early example of postmod-ern filmmaking. the story details screen-writer stephen Penny’s attempts to write a crime film in the grand cinematic tra-dition. He has a variety of potential be-ginnings and endings, but he struggles to find a middle. He discovers an op-portunity for script-doctoring assistance through a mysterious man named Dr.

Jolly, who inhabits a surreal version of the American south.”

Mes will be donating 100 percent of the proceeds to the filmmaker himself. And, they add: “you won’t be seeing this one on Netflix anytime soon!”

MES Presents “Crime Wave” 8:30 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 29. Barking Legs Theater, 1307 Dodds Ave. (423) 624-5347 barkinglegs.orgTickets available on the Chattanooga Film Festival Shopify store at http://chattanooga-film-fest.myshopify.com/products/mes-presents-crime-wave

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I suppose it’s easier to blame an out-side force, a supernatural darkness that influences our actions, but the truth is humanity is the evil it sees in the world. It is also the good. “Rosewater,” a new film by Jon Stewart, based on the memoir “And Then They Came for Me” by Mazair Bahari, examines these themes with sincerity and grace. Ba-hari is a London-based Iranian journalist who was imprisoned in Iran after the 2009-10 election protests, in part due to participating in a comedy bit for “The Daily Show with Jon Stewart.” He was accused of being a spy for the CIA, the Jews, and anyone else the Iranian gov-ernment found to be working in opposi-tion to the Ayatollah. The film recounts the days leading up to his arrest, the situation in Iran at the time, and gives insight into the inner workings of the political prison system in that country. It is a solid directorial debut for Stew-art, who makes only a few missteps, and is an engaging film for anyone with an interest in Iran.

The film opens with Mazair Baha-ri (Gael Garcia Bernal) returning to his home county to cover the Iranian elec-tions for Newsweek. Incumbent Presi-dent Mahmoud Amhadinejadis is facing the populist candidate Mir-Housse-in Mousavi. There is an electricity in the streets for Mousavi, backed by the poor and uneducated Iranians who are crying out for change. Bahari interviews supporters for both men, but finds him-self in the company of Mousavi sup-porters, who secretly install satellite

dishes and provide VPN networks for Iranians who want information not con-trolled by the state.

During his cover-age, he speaks with American come-dian Jason Jones, who refers to himself as a spy for the Americans. It is a very

small, very brief part of his coverage. His more important work is videotaping the vio-lence that breaks out after Amhadinejad is re-elected in a suspicious

landslide. A few days after this footage is uploaded, Bahari is arrested, impris-oned, and interrogated for 118 days. The crux of the evidence against him is a snippet from “The Daily Show” where he is shown talking to a “spy.”

Most of the film is engaging and pow-erful. Bahari’s experiences are harrow-ing and tense. But even more fascinat-ing is the look at the bureaucracy behind his imprisonment, the banality, and the forces at work. We get flashes of govern-ment frustration and ennui, even from the interrogator, who smells of rosewa-ter. He appears as an overworked peon, hoping to get through his day and go home to his family.

Had the film focused solely on these themes, allowing the characters to tell the story entirely, it would have been exceptional. Stewart, however, makes the odd choice of beginning and end-ing with voiceover, with having flashes of the past appearing on shop win-dows in London, and having Twit-ter hashtags appear in block letters over

the skies of Iran. At times, it feels like watching a car insurance commercial. These shifts in verisimilitude detract from the very strong human story he’s telling. There is a better way to express these ideas—hopefully, these are just the growing pains of a new and compe-tent director.

Iran has been a considerable source of Hollywood inspiration in the past few years. In 2013, “Argo” won several Os-cars for depicting a nerve-wracking dra-ma about the Canadian Caper during the Iranian Revolution. The year be-fore, “A Separation” won the Oscar for Best Foreign Language film by tell-ing a story of a dissolving marriage in a complex and rigid society.

“Rosewater” may not be in conten-tion for an Academy Award, but the film continues the tradition of informing viewers and exploring a country many Americans fear and despise. Each of these films presents a distinct picture of a region that sits perpetually on the edge of significant, dynamic change. What-ever oppression exists there will not remain eternally. “Rosewater” may the weakest of these films—but not be-cause the story is less compelling. It suffers only because it is tonally in-consistent. The film overcomes these quibbles in the end and tells an excep-tional and personal story about hope in the face of oppression. It is a film that is certainly worth a look.

The Story Behind The StoryJon Stewart’s “Rosewater” an effective directorial debut

REAL EVIL IS SO MUCH MORE BORing than fictional evil. In fact, most evil in this world can

be categorized as simple ignorance and dissatisfac-tion rather than a desire for oppression and wanton destruction. It is born out of complacence, fear, self-interest and doubt.

Maziar Bahari, Jon stewart and Gael Garcia Bernal


Picture it: The cloying scent of multiple dishes of food com-bining to permeate every pore of your body (as well as your clothing—you will smell deli-cious the next time you wear that fall sweater). The sound of family bickering due to the heat of the kitchen and the forced proximity. The oc-casional whiff of alcohol from the statistical-ly likely intox-icated family member who is either vehe-mently deny-ing it or openly embracing it and announcing the worst is yet to come…

“Special” dishware seen only twice a year (three, de-pending on the recognition of Easter on a family-by-family basis), an octogenarian who may or may not have a pulse (or teeth) based on their posi-tion as they lay unconscious in a chair, an unwanted pet leav-ing shit-mines on the floor…

It’s Thanksgiving, a beauti-fully nondenominational holi-day based on nothing but the concept of gratitude for nour-ishment that is hard to not look forward to no matter how

some group of assholes tries to somehow vilify it as is done to other holidays. I actually look forward to it, but wait—I’m a cop.

I’ll be spending it in a car. (“Sad trombone Sound.”)

My view of Thanksgiving? It’s not of snot-nosed kids breaking mom’s antiques or Aunt Lana’s rants of eternal

self-deluded victimization. No. My view is of after-noon streets looking like a

set from “The Walking Dead” (not to be confused with East Lake), and business districts normally packed with cars now only populated by the errant stray cat or newspaper insert drifting along a sewer drain at the mercy of the wind…

Streets usually packed with people are barren, and even the malls are nearly locked down. Everyone is at home, except for cops and our distant cousins, the convenience store clerks. Even the bums are gone, huddled inside churches or the Community Kitchen downtown eating to their hearts’ content.

And so for the indigenous cop, Thanksgiving turkey comes in the form of a turkey dog (or so I hope) and the trim-mings consist of whatever can be squeezed out of a sealed packet or now, thanks to ad-vancements in Convenience Store Technology, actual bot-tles of condiments. The only pie for dessert will be a min-iature one filled with pecans and a “Little Debbie” label on its wrapper, but the pumpkin spice coffee-powder-machine thing will bring some comfort at least.

If this sounds negative, though, it’s not. Those are just observations of Cop Reality. We chose this job and there’s no time off for good behavior.

Speaking of which, I do have one unspoken rule about working Thanksgiving and Christmas that may come off as a tad harsh: Mandatory Arrests for Domestic Disorders.

I don’t feel as strongly about it as I did earlier in my career, but I’ve always felt that if you are such a dysfunctional hu-man being that you cannot control yourself to the point of not having to call the po-lice to your home on arguably the most wholesome holiday of the year, you have an auto-matic ride to the Quiet Room coming your way.

I’d go pretty far to spend this holiday with my family,

but I made a choice that re-quires me to be on the job in-stead of with them. So if you get the privilege of being with yours and require actual police intervention to restore order…well. Order will be restored and the only cranberry sauce your ass will be getting will be in the corner of a Styrofoam tray from the capable chefs (no lie) at 601 Walnut Street. I just want to help people, and for the sake of your family, I will help you a lot on a holiday. (Fair warning.)

Where was I? Ah. The addi-tion of sauerkraut in the mod-ern Kangaroo (and occasional Racetrack).

It’s really changed my tradi-tional on-duty holiday meal. It almost seems taboo, but that thought fades once that Heinz spicy mustard makes itself known under that kraut...Mm-mmm.

Whatever you’re thankful for, hold on to it. Keep it close. And when Aunt Lana tries to kick you out for no reason or Cousin Jefferson spills your drink? Just let it go. Tomorrow is another day, and it’s not a holiday. Enjoy your meal in peace and I assure you…I will enjoy mine.

(I mean, spicy mustard and sauerkraut, right?! Now every day can be Thanksgiving…for Officer Teach.)

When officer Alexander D. teach is not patrolling our fair city on the heels of the criminal element, he spends his spare time volunteering for the Boehm Birth Defects Center. Follow him on Face-book at facebook.com/alexteach

Have a Happy Copsgiving

On The Beat

AleX teAcH

“Whatever you’re thankful for, hold on to it. keep it close. And when Aunt Lana tries to kick you out for no reason or Cousin Jefferson spills your drink? Just let it go.”

Officer Alex explains that it’s the little things that mean a lot. Like sauerkraut and mustard.

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Diversions

Consider Thiswith Dr. Rick

“We must free ourselves of the hope that the sea will ever rest. We must learn to sail in high winds.” — aristotle Onassis

oK, so everyone living a completely worry-free, nothing’s-ever-wrong, smooth-sailing kind of life raise your hand.

nice fantasy, right? Well, maybe. We don’t learn the important things in life from the smooth, easy times, though. But we certainly learn—if we’re open—from the rocky, challenging times.

so how do we make the most of those chapters of life when we have to sail in high winds? health, finances, family, loss, relationships, school, work…these can make for some tremendously rocky seas.

and yet, it’s reality. There’s nothing wrong with hoping for a restful sea, provided we can see things as they are. Perhaps the point is to learn, to use our tools and support system, our gathered wisdom, and then—move on. confident that smoother sailing will have its turn.

by Rick Pimental-Habib, Ph.D.

the pulse 11.48 » november 27, 2014

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