SESSION 10.

COMMUNICATION

ASSERTIVENESS

The BELIEFSYou hold

Your BEHAVIOURIn a range of situation

The RESULTSFrom situation and

how you interpret them

The RIGHTSYou give yourself and

others

affectsaffects

affects affects

ASSERTIVENESS

Beliefs can be:a) barrier beliefsb) assertive beliefs

Assertiveness and negotiations.win-win resultcompromisesHow to say ‘No’?

ASSERTIVENESS

Types of Assertion:Basic

e.g.. ‘As I see it, the system is working well.’

Empathetice.g.: ‘I know you are busy right now. However, I’d like to make a quick

request of you.’

Discrepancye.g.: ‘As I understand it, we agreed that project A was top priority. Now, you are asking

me to give more time to project B. I’d like to clarify which is now the priority.’

Negative feelingse.g.: ‘I feel annoyed about this, so in the future I’d like to have it by Friday

lunchtime.’

Consequencee.g.:’If you continue to withhold the information, I am left with no option

but to bring in the production director. I’d prefer not to.’

Responsivee.g.: ‘John, I’d like to hear your views on this one.’

ASSERTIVENESS

Situation Your thinking process Your feelings

Your behaviour

triggers affects

leads to

ASSERTIVENESS

• Giving and receiving criticism about performance

• How others influence you

• Handling negative feelings

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

”DISCOVERY CONSISTS OF SEEING WHAT EVERYBODY HAS SEEN AND THINKING WHAT NOBODY HAS THOUGHT.”

Albert von Szent-Györgyi

LEARNING

• http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BDujDOLre-8 THORNDIKE

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

E. L. Thorndike (1874-1949)

- started from Pavlov’s theory on conditioning- developed his puzzle box- set up the theory that LEARNING = BEHAVIOUR+CONSEQUENCES

THE LAW EFFECT- developed PSYCHOLOGICAL CONNECTIONISM

that is: artificial intelligence, cognitive science, neuroscience, psychology, philosophy of mind

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

Thorndike’s four dimensions of abstract intelligence:

• ALTITUDE: the complexity or difficulty of tasks one can perform

• WIDTH: the variety of tasks of/at a given difficulty

• AREA: a function of width and altitude

• SPEED: the number of tasks one can complete in a given time

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

• Thorndike’s social intelligence

• Daniel Goleman (1946-), R. Boyatzis, Annie McKee – the four skills of emotional intelligence (‘Primal Leadership’)

1. Self-awareness2. Self-management

3. Social awareness4. Relationship management

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

The four emotional intelligence skills tend to pair up under two primary competencies:

Personal competence is a result of self-awareness and self-manegement skills

Social competence is a result of social awareness and relationship management skills

PERSUASION

”As soon as you move one step up from the bottom, your effectiveness depends on your ability to reach others through the spoken and written word.” PETER DRUCKER

”If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it well enough.” ALBERT EINSTEIN

THE SOCIAL INFLUENCE

ELLIOT ARONSON: ‘THE SOCIAL ANIMAL’

• CONFORMITY• MASS COMMUNICATION, PROPAGANDA,

PERSUASION• SOCIAL COGNITION• SELF-JUSTIFICATION• HUMAN AGGRESSION• PREJUDICE• LIKING, LOVING & INTERPERSONAL

SENSITIVITY

THE ART OF PERSUASION

”Civilization advances by extending the number of operations we can perform without thinking about them.”

Alfred North Whitehead – British philosopher

Robert B. Cialdini asks the question:”What are the factors that cause one person to say ‘yes’ to another person?”

Weapons of influence:Click & whirrtrigger feature

R. CIALDINI

SOCIAL PSYCHOLOGY

THE ART OF PERSUASION

Cialdini’s seven principles of compliance

1. RECIPROCATION2. COMMITMENTS AND CONSISTENCY3. SOCIAL PROOF4. LIKING5. AUTHORITY6. SCARCITY7. CONSENSUS

DAN SPERBER

Dad: ‘Go and wash your teeth.’Son: ‘I am not sleepy yet.’

Peter: Do you want some coffee?Mary: Coffee would keep me awake.

Peter: Would you come to the cinema tonight?Mary: I am visiting my grandma.CONTEXT-MEDIATED INFORMATIONLANGUAGE UNDER-DETERMINES THOUGHT

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DAN SPERBER

UTTERANCE: any speech sequence consisting of one or more words and preceded and followed by silence (NOT NECESSARILY): it may be coextensive with a sentence. In writing there are only representations of it.

INFERENCE: the act of drawing a conclusion by deductive reasoning from given facts. The conclusion drawn is also called an inference. It is closely related to logic. There are correct, incorrect, automatic logical inference types.- syllogism, a logical appeal, a logical argumentation:a. All men are mortal.b. Socrates is a man.c. Socrates is mortal.

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DAN SPERBER

IMPLICATURE: (coined by H.G. Grice) pragmatics – what is suggested/offered in an utteranceinferences that are deducted from statements without the additional meaning in logic – implications, in-between-the-lines

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DAN SPERBER

RELEVANCE THEORY: seeks to explain the second method of communication: one that takes into account implicit inferences. It argues that the hearer/reader/audience will search for meaning in any given communication situation and having found meaning that fits their expectation of relevance, will stop processing.

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DAN SPERBER

aircentral thoughtprocesses

linguisticencoder

thought

SPEAKER

receivedthought

linguisticdecoder

centralthoughtprocesses

HEARER

acousticsignal

receivedacousticsignal

noise

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NEURO-LINGUISTIC PROGRAMMING

NLP is the study of the stucture of the subjective experience.It sudies how successful people do what they do, the essence of it, and how to replicate this experience in anyone else. It is prevailent in nearly every field of life: learning, teaching, selling, negotiating, personal relationships, etc.

Language – a system of communication consisting of sounds, words and grammar, or the system of communication used by people of a particular country or profession

Pragmatics - is concerned with bridging the explanatory gap between sentense meaning and speaker's meaning. The study of how context influences the interpretation is then crucial. Pragmatics is a subdomain of general linguistics.

NLP

BECAUSE

NEURO-LINGUISTIC PROGRAMMING

Semantics - (Greek semantikos, giving signs, significant, symptomatic, from sema, sign) is the study of meaning.

Register – (Halliday et al, 1964) is a term most usually employed to cover varities according to use. Components:Field (topic)Mode (whether written or spoken)Tenor (style)

NLP

NLP and Emotional Intelligence

Relationship between mind and languageVAKOG

VisualAuditoryKinaestheticOlfactoryGustatory

NLP

Howard Gardner’s MI Theory (Multiple Intelligence- Musical/Rhythmic, Verbal/Linguistic,Visual/Spatial,Bodily/Kinaesthetic,Logical/Mathematical, Intra- and Interpersonal)

Naturalistic Intelligence (to account for the ability to recognise and classify patterns in nature)

Goleman’s Emotional Intelligence

Artificial Intelligence – Turing Test

PUBLIC SPEAKING/PRESENTATION

WHAT WE SHOULD AVOID:

1.Not tailoring your message to your audience. 2.Letting your eyes dart around the room. 3.Not crafting a powerful opening.4.Distracting mannerisms. 5.Not rehearsing. 6.Discussing how nervous you are.

PUBLIC SPEAKING/PRESENTATION

7. Having low energy. 8. Data dumping. 9. Not inspiring your audience. 10. Forgetting to pause. 11. Ending with a Q&A. 12. Reading from your slides. 13. Making an excuse or an apology.

SOCIAL MARKETING

BEHAVIOURSOCIAL MARKETING

CHILDREN

ACCEPTANCE

SOCIAL EUROPE

TOGETHER