s eptember ovember contents - personaltransformation.com · receiving. rick jarow explains that...

S E P T E M B E R — N O V E M B E R 1 9 9 6

ContentsVOLUME 6 • NUMBER 1

26Second Sight

An interview with Judith Orloffon the psychic as anaspect of spirituality.

MARY NURRIESTEARNS

34Imagination

Imagination is where youdiscover the real you.GLORIA CHADWICK

37A Father for Every Child

Re-creating fatherhoodas a vital social role.

DAVID BLANKENHORN

41Ethical Choices

Accountability, telling thetruth, and acting ethically.

JEFFREY PATNAUDE

45Suffering Can Be Useful

Hardships are a catalysts forchange and development.

POLLY YOUNG-EISENDRATH

49Inner and Outer Peace

Attaining inner peace andcontributing to outer peace.

RAJINDER SINGH

52The Seat of Prosperity

An open heart is at thecenter of prosperity.

RICK JAROW

57Radical Self-Acceptance.

Personal growth dependsupon our self love.

JAMES M. MCMAHON

80Commitment

Commitment as an aspect ofextraordinary living.

SWAMI CHETANANANDA

3PERSONAL TRANSFORMATION • SEPTEMBER — NOVEMBER 1996

4From the Publisher

Personal transformation involvesbecoming more conscious.

7From the Editor

Meditation as a way of life isvastly rewarding.

8Conscious Notes

Bringing SpiritTo a Material World

CONSCIOUS CONSUMPTION

AND OWNERSHIP.

13My Spirit is Free

TransformationsAMY ALLISON

15Reflections

Letters from our readers ontransformations in progress,

integrity and more.

18Inwardly with Meditation

Transformations JASON SIFF

60Relax

A simple method of relaxation.J.P. VASWANI

64Book Reviews

Exploring Goddess andcreativity in the workplace.BARBARA NEIGHBORS DEAL

68Resources

Resources to support yourpersonal and spiritual growth.

70Music Touches Our Soul

Music selections for yourtransformation.

ContentsS E P T E M B E R — N O V E M B E R 1 9 9 6

Life is about this—just how much we love ourselves. If we

love and enjoy ourselves, we are free and are living life to its

fullest. If we don’t love ourselves, we are being deprived of the

most important thing in the history of the universe—our life.

—James McMahon

COVER: INDEX STOCK/WALLACE GARRISON

PAGE 1: IMAGE BANK/HARALD SUND

PAGE 3: IMAGE BANK/ROBERT KRISTOFIK

PERSONAL TRANSFORMA-TION is about reclaimingour lives in ways thatbring renewed meaning,energy, and happiness toourselves and others.

One of our tasks along the way is to evolve a conscious personality sothat it becomes an instrument of our soul. As young children, weabsorbed beneficial, along with detrimental, beliefs, habits, and emotionsfrom family and society that imprinted in our consciousness how andwho we were to be.

Many of us still carry unconscious beliefs about ourselves and life thatprevent us from being who we truly are. These life-limiting attitudeswere embedded in our consciousness at a time when we were less able todiscern reality and truth for ourselves. We were less equipped to defendor act upon inner truths. In so many ways, family and society definedwho we were. We were told how we were and were not supposed to be.We also saw adults model what life was to be like when we grew up. Ourstyle of dealing with our emotions is created in the same way. For exam-ple, if a baby is told to stop crying when he is hurt, over time, he learnsto stifle feelings.

To recreate ourselves, we must discover and make conscious ourunconscious, as the unconscious can sabotage our efforts to create thelife we are meant to live. To transform our lives, we must experientiallyjourney back into our roots to discover our social, mental, and emotionalimprints. Breath work, movement, body work, meditation, dream work,journaling, and creative expression tap our body-mind so that we mayrelease energy and free trapped emotions and beliefs. This creates inter-nal space for new possibilities as well as reducing the distance betweenour experience and our inner essence.

Once we appreciate and release our past, we are prepared to makenew decisions about who we are, and how we want to live. Knowing our-selves profoundly connects us to our essence, and we become guided byour higher selves to live with meaning and fulfillment.

May we all become more conscious. May we all be the men andwomen we are meant to be.

Rick NurrieStearnsPublisher

4

LotusPersonal Transformation

PUBLISHER AND PRESIDENT

Rick NurrieStearns

EDITOR

Mary NurrieStearns

ASSOCIATE EDITOR

Tina Rasmussen

EDITORIAL ASSISTANT

Patti Weaver

BOOK REVIEW EDITOR

Barbara Neighbors Deal

CIRCULATION MANAGER

Patricia McClure

LAYOUT & PRODUCTION

Rick NurrieStearns

PRODUCTION ASSISTANT

Patricia McClure

ADVERTISING & MARKETING MANAGER

Jacki Brooks-Christie

MARKETING CONSULTANT

Tracy Beckes

Personal Transformation–Lotus, Journal for PersonalTransformation (ISSN 1056-3954) is published fivetimes a year (October, December, February, May, July)by Lotus Publishing, Inc., 4032 South Lamar Blvd.#500-137, Austin Texas 78704. (918)683-4560. Copy-right 1996 by Lotus Publishing, Inc. All rights reserved.No part of this publication may be reproduced or trans-mitted in any form or by any means, electronic ormechanical, including photocopying, recording, or byany information storage retrieval systems without writ-ten permission of Lotus Publishing Inc. Lotus Publish-ing assumes no liability for any material published here-in. All statements are the responsibility of the authors.Annual Subscription Rates are: U.S. $19.95; Canada andMexico $24.95.; Other countries $29.95. Single copies$4.95; Canada $6.00. Business office, Lotus Publishing,Muskogee, Ok. Application to mail at the Periodicalspostage rate is pending at Muskogee Ok. and at addi-tional mailing offices. Postmaster: Send address changesand subscription requests to Lotus Publishing, Inc.,4032 South Lamar Blvd. #500-137, Austin, Texas,78704.

PRINTED IN THE USA.

ADVERTISING INFORMATION

800-775-6887 • 918-683-4560Fax 918-683-2466

SUBSCRIPTION INFORMATION

For address changes and questions,see page 16, or contact

Lotus Customer Service4032 South Lamar Blvd. #500-137

Austin, Texas 78704. Or call800-775-6887

LIST RENTAL INFORMATION

Contact: Pacific List100 Tamal Plaza Suite 50Corte Madera, CA 94925

415-945-9450 • Fax 415-945-9451

RETAIL INFORMATION

To have your local store carry PERSONAL

TRANSFORMATION or to learn how youcan order risk-free copies to sell at your

location call 800-775-6887

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From thePublisher

Envision life as a meditation:breathing in and breathing outlove, truth, and compassionateaction. Imagine family, business,and political life within this way ofbeing.

This issue of PERSONAL

TRANSFORMATION directs ustowards this possibility. In thebroader sense, this issue is aboutmeditation. Meditation rewardsus with a personality groundedin truth and love. Meditationempowers us in two spiritualarenas. First, it leads us to innerpeace and fulfillment, which wefind by discovering our trueessence, our divine nature, andour deepest yearnings. Second,meditation allows us to use ourtalents and skills to make theworld a better place to live, bydirecting us to pursue our inner-most dreams.

Rajinder Singh elaborates on these ideas beau-tifully. He says that by mastering meditation, wenot only attain personal fulfillment, we become aninstrument for bringing peace and joy to thosearound us. Through meditation, we merge in theCreator and realize that all beings are brothersand sisters in the creator. It is at this stage that wedevelop true love for all and become ambassadorsof God’s love.

It follows that our hearts are the source of pros-perity. If prosperity is achieved without an openheart, we still feel poor. Looking deeply, we seethat the way of the heart is the way of giving andreceiving. Rick Jarow explains that this basicmovement of the heart is mirrored by the in andthe out breath. The inhale receives from life, andthe exhale offers itself back to life. Often, we donot allow ourselves to receive because we have notdeveloped a strong, centered ground. We simply

cannot hold the energy of bounty. We can retrainourselves to receive, by practicing receiving thefullness of our breaths.

Meditation offers many gifts. Gloria Chadwicktells us how meditation releases our imagination,to discover the real us. The imagination is a place

where we can reconnect with ourtrue spiritual nature, and be freeto be simply who we are. Medita-tion helps us let go of outside dis-tractions, so we can tune into oursubconscious, where we can listento our innermost thoughts andallow our feelings to speak clearly.

In our interview, Judith Orloffdiscusses how meditation lets usconnect and communicate withour spirit. She knows personallythat the surest route to the psychicis through meditation. Meditationlets us tone down the static in ourminds, amplifying our intuitivevoice. Meditation, as a spiritual

path, opens our psychic nature, while also ground-ing us so that we may use our heightened sensitivi-ty and capacity in the service of humanity.

Meditation is also practical. It is good for ourhealth because it helps us to relax. We cannotbreath deeply and calm our minds and yet remaintense. For those times when we need extra help torelax, J.P. Vaswani shares a simple method forrelaxation.

Meditation, even a few minutes a day, is vastlybeneficial. So, let’s stay our transformationalcourse and take some sacred time daily to com-mune with breath, the divine, and our deeperselves.

Welcome to PERSONAL TRANSFORMATION.

Mary NurrieStearnsEditor


From the Editor…

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Real compassion and love will come only by practicing spirituality.—Mata Amritanandamayi

8 SEPTEMBER — NOVEMBER 1996 • PERSONAL TRANSFORMATION

Expression of ourspiritual beliefsoften flows natu-

rally in relation to the“softer” aspects of ourlives, when we’re medi-tating, enjoying nature,or relating to loved ones.But how does our spiri-tuality fit with the morematerial aspects, such asshopping for groceries,buying a car, or makinginvestments? It is tempt-ing to relegate such mat-ters to a separate sphere,believing that they are“necessary evils,” but arein no way connected toour spiritual path.

With each buyingdecision we make—whether it is a simplefood purchase or a majorstock investment—weare making a statementabout what we want tosupport with our finan-cial resources. We arecontributing to the exis-tence of large institu-tions, which have a

tremendous impact onthe world, by providingjobs, affecting the envi-ronment, and influenc-ing the economy.

Being consciousabout our consumptionand investment choicesbrings them to a higherlevel, transforming theminto tangible expressionsof our intangible spiritu-al beliefs and values.Conversely, if we areunconscious about ourconsumption and invest-ment choices, we may beunknowingly supportinginstitutions which are indirect contradiction toour spiritual beliefs.Either way, we are “vot-ing with our dollars” bycontributing to the exis-tence of these institu-tions.

CONSCIOUS

CONSUMPTION

Some consumerchoices are fairly obvi-ous in their implications.

If we buy meat, we knowthat animals have died inthe process of that pur-chase. If we buy toyguns, we know that theyencourage children to“play war.” But whatabout more nebulouschoices, like cereal orclothing?

Imagine that youneed to buy a new pairof jeans. It’s likely thatprice, fit, fashion, andavailability will be fac-tors in your decision.But what about the con-ditions under which thejeans were sewn? Somejeans are sewn by peopleunder horrible condi-tions. According to theUnited Nations, inextreme cases such asthe country of Burma,commonplace condi-tions include “torture,summary and arbitraryexecutions, forced labor,abuse of women, politi-cally-motivated arrests”(Source: Business Ethics,

July/August 1996). Ifyou purchased a pair ofjeans while unaware oftheir origins, not onlywould you be supportingthis militaristic regime,but you would be carry-ing around with you thenegative energy woveninto the very fabric ofthe pants. Conversely, ifyou were aware of suchissues, you might becomforted to know thatsocially responsiblecompanies, such as LeviStrauss & Co., havepulled out of Burma, andyou could purchase jeanswith some assurance oftheir origins.

We may wonder howmuch impact our choiceof jeans has on the bigpicture of our world.However, our purchas-ing power has moreimpact than we mightimagine. Remember theeconomic sanctionsplaced on South Africa,to make a statement

Bringing SpiritTo a Material

WorldT I N A R A S M U S S E N

CONSCIOUS NOTES

9

against apartheid? Onlya decade later, SouthAfrica is a changedplace. While it could besaid that a global shift inconsciousness effectedthis change, the Rev.Desmond Tutu has saidthat the economic sanc-tions were responsible.Now, the companies thatonce withdrew fromSouth Africa can returnto establish businesseswhich provide employ-ment that honors humanequality and contributesto an economy that isworth supporting.

But how do we knowwhich companies wewant to support? It doestake some extra time,but with the growingconsumer demand, easy-to-use resources arebecoming more widelyavailable. For example,the 1994 book, Shoppingfor a Better World, is aquick and easy guide tovalues-based purchasing.It lists items by type andbrand name, andincludes just about anycategory of consumerproduct one might pur-chase, from office sup-plies to cars to personalcare items. Each item israted on a variety of cat-egories which the Coun-cil on Economic Priori-ties has identified asimportant. It costs $14.Another resource, theNational Green Pages,contains over 100 cate-gories of products andservices from companiesthat “care about people

and the environment.” Itis published by Co-opAmerica, and costs$6.95. Both are available(or can be special-ordered) in book stores.

Using these books asresources can ensurethat our prosperity isflowing to organizationswhich we want to pros-per. We can use theproducts knowing thatwe have consciouslycontributed to a betterworld. We can also beassured that we are notconsuming negativeenergy inherent in many

products’ creation.Being conscious in ourconsumer purchasinghelps us move from feel-ing disempowered about“what the big companiesare doing to the world”to feeling empoweredthat, even as one person,we can make a differenceby consciously choosingthe organizations thatwe support.

CONSCIOUS

OWNERSHIP

A second area inwhich we can “vote withour dollars” and bring

our spiritual values tothe material aspects ofour lives concerns ourinvestment decisions.With the way the stockmarket is set up, individ-ual stockholders do nothave much of an intel-lectual or “heart” con-nection to the compa-nies in which theyinvest. We aren’tinvolved in the way thecompany does business,and we may not knowwhat products the com-pany produces—eventhough we are technical-ly the “owners.” We areeven more disconnectedwhen we invest in mutu-al funds, because thefund manager buys andsells our stocks for us;we may not even knowwhich companies ourmoney is supporting.Co-op America recentlypublished a report whichfound that nine of thelargest fifteen U.S.mutual funds investheavily in tobacco. Thisis an example of howindividual investors mayunknowingly support anindustry accused ofkilling 400,000 Ameri-cans a year.

Yet, it is common tosee magazine articles orhear people discussinghow “big business” isresponsible for the ills ofour era. For example, aFebruary 1996 cover ofNewsweek was entitled“Corporate Killers.” Itseems simple: corpora-tions and their CEOsare the cause of all this

PERSONAL TRANSFORMATION • SEPTEMBER — NOVEMBER 1996

Each of us, alone, is only asingle consumer; but together,we are millions strong. Whatimpact do we want to have onthe larger system? Do we wantto abdicate our right tochoose, or do we want toconsciously supportcompanies striving forhumanistic, sustainable values?By being aware of the impactof our decisions and using ourfinancial resources tocontribute to companies thatmake the world a better place,we can make a difference inbringing spirit to amaterial world.

P L E A S E T U R N T O PA G E 1 1

pain. However, when we view thissystematically it is much morecomplex, as David Korten, authorof When Corporations Rule theWorld, points out. He notes thatthe chairman of Eastman Kodakwas praised for record profits in1992, and then fired in 1993 forcutting only 2,000 jobs wheninvestors wanted him to cut20,000. Conversely, the stock mar-ket considers Scott Paper’s CEOto be exemplary. In two years hecut 11,000 jobs, slashed researchspending in half, eliminated allcharitable contributions, andordered managers not to volunteerfor community service. ScottPaper’s market share increased 225percent, and the CEO received$100 million in compensation.

The irony of this is that the“owners,” who clamor for profitsrelentlessly every quarter, are allthe individuals who have invest-ments—one-third of all Americanadults. It turns out that “them,” isus.

So what can we do to ensurethat we are conscious investors?First, we can invest in companiesor mutual funds that are screenedfor social responsibility andhumanistic business practices.Over 100 investment firms spe-cialize in socially-responsibleinvesting, screening out compa-nies with harmful business prac-tices. Many of these companiesboast financial returns equal to orexceeding traditional mutualfunds. A few of the more well-known ones include Pax World(800-767-1729), Calvert (800-368-2748) and Parnassus (800-999-3505). The non-profit groupCo-op America also provides thehandbook You, Your Money & theWorld as a guide to values-basedinvesting. Membership to Co-op

11

Conscious NotesContinued from page 9

Institute ofTranspersonal Psychology

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��P L E A S E T U R N T O PA G E 7 9


Once upon a time, before my fourth decade oflife, fireworks, explosions, and symphoniccrescendos were present, I am sure, and

marked various turning points in my life, but not thecommencement of my personal evolution.

The evolving of the transformation that is still ever-spiraling came as gently as a Sunday afternoon’s rain. Idecided to stop relying on what the world offered to myhuman form, chemicals, food, people, for a “high”, andcame to feel a hunger and thirst belonging to my numband starving soul. These new sensations could only beappeased with dedicated contemplation of theunknown, all-powerful Universal Intelligence…myHigher Power. Some refer to this Being as God.

This process of change was not smooth, uninter-rupted, or without a lot of mental, emotional, and spir-itual pain—it may be likened to the following tale:

“My life had become an island of fire, savage natives,and wild beasts. There was no drinkable water. Thedrums of the natives were hammered by dark handswith white palms, and the rhythm pounded against theinsides of my skull. I found an old rotted rowboat. It

was in terrible condition, yet through some miracle, itappeared to be without leaks. One night in deliriousfrenzy, I ran to the water, pushed the boat loose fromthe sand, and jumped in.

“As I drifted, I was thankful to be away from theintense heat, insane screaming, and physical threats onmy life. Then I looked towards the dark, unknownwaters reaching out before me in all directions. Therewere no instructions, no maps. Food was raw fish. Sleepwas deep, despite the uncomfortable board mattress.There was light and warmth inside me, even in thedarkest nights on turbulent waters. I awoke to the sunin my eyes and hopes that my journey would bring menew life.”

During the first few weeks in my “lonely little boat,”I secluded myself at a bed and breakfast in the hills ofsouthern Indiana. And meditated. And prayed. I talkedto my God, asking for “proof” of his existence. At thesuggestion of a spiritual advisor, I had purchased theboard game “Life.” I opened the board, took the plas-tic pieces out of their wrappers, looked at the tokens,and read the directions. I was without a clue. I couldn’tplay this game. I thought I was lost. But I prayed, read,

A M Y A L L I S O N

Transformations

My Spiritis Free

and meditated. I looked at my lifewith new awareness. I washed themake-up off my face and didn’twear any for a year. I ate fruits andvegetables and drank water. I cutmy hair. I felt like I was beingborn again, but this birth canalwas endless.

My self-defining objects wereslowly removed from my life. Iwas banned from my office: othersfeared me and my behavior, in myearliest days of my journey. I wasostracized by friends who did notlike the fact I wanted a new life formyself. I shunned my family fornearly a year, as their ways andactions were toxic, and I was in araw, flesh-ripped and emotional-ly-stripped state. I quit smoking. Iasked my husband to leave andnever come back. Our marriagewas conceived by two plastic,addictive-riddled people and nolonger had any meaning whatso-ever.

Even in this “new” state, Imade old mistakes. I entered intoa relationship that resembled myfather’s and mine as I grew up. Mynaive curiosity took me into somenot-so-healthy situations. I stillblamed others for situations thatbefell me and had trouble accept-ing responsibility for my life. Itwas too easy to be a victim.

I rushed to make up for losttime. I was doing, doing, alwaysdoing. Until one day. After aboutsix years into my transformation-al journey, someone reminded methat I was a human being, not ahuman doing. I tried to slow down.I asked God to slow me down. Ihelped others who were travelinga similar journey. I turned to amore spiritually-aware mode ofliving. I worked the Twelve Steps

of recovery to the best of my abil-ity. I gave people the benefit-of-the-doubt. I re-built a relationshipwith my estranged father. I decid-ed that becoming more like mymother wasn’t the kiss of death.

I did not find the vaccine forcancer and could not make a BettyCrocker soufflé. I was never goingto be a high school cheerleader orhomecoming queen or reach aGolden wedding anniversary. Iwas never going to look good in abikini. I wasn’t going to be a mil-lionaire, nor live like one. I wasn’ton the Dean’s List or in a sorority.I was never going to be a mother.But…

I found a cure for my lonelinessand learned how to rely on myselfto bolster my self-esteem. Ilearned to cook some very delec-table dishes. I maintained my fig-ure, and came to accept that I was-n’t twenty-two years-old anylonger, or a size 3. I found a rela-tionship with a man that mayblossom into a marriage “til deathdo us part.” I have a good payingjob and a very comfortable housewith a multitude of plants and“natural” memorabilia. I graduat-ed with a 3.5 and earned a Mas-ter’s in Business Administration. Ihave a beautiful step-daughter-to-be and a step-grandson-to-be. Ihave two of the most adorable,lovable kitties that any cat lovercould want. I belong to a fellow-ship of people who are on a simi-lar journey. I am not alone, and Iam loved.

I have not had the life that Ithought I wanted,—but throughthis transformation, I found that Iam a child of God, and my spirit isfinally free.•


TransformationsA RESOURCE FORTRANSFORMATION

Mary NurrieStearns LCSWPsychotherapist, consultant, workshopleader, and editor of PERSONAL TRANSFOR-MATION. Mary has over twenty-two yearsexperience helping people to transform theirpersonalities and to live with more peace,meaning and joy. She is committed to pro-viding safe and experiential contexts for per-sonal growth and healing that integratebody, mind, and spirit.

Mary offers a unique union of traditionalpsychotherapy with transpersonal psycholo-gy. She is a leading edge therapist in the fieldof personal transformation.

Mary offers telephone consultations andtherapy for psychological healing and per-sonal transformation.

To schedule an appointment call:(800)775-6887

McClintockV5N5 P14

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15

F E L L I N L O V E

I am writing to thank Nancy Pasternack for sharing her story in theTransformations section of the May-July ‘96 issue. For all of us whostruggle with health challenges (occasional or chronic) and who believethat these challenges can be opportunities for healing our soul, as well asour body, you have made our task a little easier.

Your commitment to healing at the soul level, your honesty, and yourself-acceptance are inspiring. I especially liked your statements that“there is no right or wrong way to heal and no timetable,” and “I feel cer-tain that it’s OK to be where I am and who I am: a Transformation inProgress.” For me, learning to accept where I am and my own timing isan essential part of the healing itself.

We are all transformations in progress, no matter what our physicalcondition, age, profession, etc. Your story helped remind me that there isno shame in being “in progress.” That, in fact, the healing and “remodel-ing” of our lives is a worthy and heroic venture. I bow to the healing and“remodeling” process in you, in me, and us all.

Let me also take this opportunity to commend PERSONAL TRANSFOR-MATION for a wonderful magazine. I fell in love instantly with your firstissue and have been an avid supporter ever since. While I have to admit Iprefer LOTUS over your current name (I like the imagery that LOTUS

brings to mind, and it seems less like a trendy New Age name), I will con-tinue to look forward to each issue, no matter what its name! A rose byany other name is still a rose!—Lynn Tanny, Gainsville, Florida.

C O R R E C T I O N

In “Our Bodies Are Spiritual,” by Carmen Renee Berry (July/ Sept), atranscription error changed the meaning of the third paragraph. Theparagraph should have read: “We all long to be loved and accepted com-pletely. Since we are spiritual beings, for us to feel acceptable, we oftensense that this means being acceptable to God. And, since we are physicalbeings, this acceptance must include our bodies, our entire bodies.”

We apologize to Ms. Berry for this error.

Reflections

From Our Readers

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Hurley/DobsonEnneagram

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Meditation is considered a higher spiritualpursuit in Eastern religions. It is widelyknown that meditation can lead to almost

any spiritual experience imaginable, and that religiousphilosophies and practices have evolved out of thevision of those who have devoted themselves to medi-tation.

When I first began meditating, knowing all of this,I thought “How could anyone go wrong with medita-tion?” It was the perfect way. You did not need tobelieve in any dogma or doctrine, and rituals were notpart of the deal. The only thing I did not take intoconsideration was the power of meditation to createillusions. I did not know that it could also be used asan escape from the things about myself I did not wantto face.

It wasn’t until I had meditated for two years, in theearly part of my second year as a Theravada Buddhistmonk, living at a monastery in Sri Lanka, devotingeight to twelve hours each day to sitting, that I startedto see that the bright lights, the sense of well-being,the feelings of bliss and harmony, were fine—but not

what was real to me as a human being. The anger,frustration, craving, and fears that I had known sowell before I meditated had become so pacified anddistorted that I could not recognize them any longer.It was as though I had distanced myself from myselfso much that what I had known of myself had becomesomeone else. I saw that I was living in a world whereI did not connect with my personal history, but withsomething vaster, other than me, placing my sense ofwhat was real in the realm of timeless, faceless experi-ences. I never thought I was fully enlightened or any-thing like that, only that I was becoming adept atmeditation and accustomed to the range of spiritualexperiences and understandings open to us. Nowa-days, when I read spiritual material about the infinite,oneness with everything, the emptiness of all phe-nomena, the bliss of unity, the extinguishing of self-hood, it reminds me of meditation before my fall,when I could dwell in the illusion of having no suffer-ing, when, in truth, I had only found a temporaryescape.

This understanding felt like my first moment of

Transformations

J A S O N S I F F

TransformingInwardly withMeditation

self-honesty since I began medi-tating. Shortly thereafter, I real-ized that I did not like a fellowmonk at the monastery where Iwas living. The self-appointedlibrarian, he would not leave mealone, pressuring me to work forhim when I was in the library qui-etly reading. Each day, I grewmore annoyed with his pushinessand felt guilty about my lack ofgoodwill toward him and thelibrary, but I wasn’t there to cata-log books eight hours a day. Thisconflict was unexpected. I wasangry with him, due to hisdemands and rudeness, andashamed of my selfishness andresistance. One day, walking backto my hut from the library, Irepeatedly uttered under mybreath, “I do not like that monk, Ido not like him.” It was like a rev-elation of the highest order! Iknew that was incontrovertiblytrue at that moment, and that myfeelings were greatly affecting me.Unfortunately, I had bypassedthose feelings and their consum-mate truth through the power ofmy meditation sittings.

This was self-honesty. Anintensely felt truth leaked out tospoil the pristine illusion of peaceand harmony. I discovered thatmeditation can provide the peaceand clarity from which one canhave an intense feeling and knowits truth and value.

About a year later, I beganteaching meditation to peoplefrom Europe, America, and Aus-tralia at a meditation center in thecentral mountains of Sri Lanka. Iwas hit with questions about howto deal with anger and lust andwas asked the most difficult one ofall, “How does meditation relateto real life?” No answers aboutfinding a transcendent reality,whether it be a universal oneness


Richard Moss

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or a constant underlying flux ofchange, satisfied these people whowanted practical answers for theirpersonal and worldly problems.

With these educated peoplefrom Western countries, who hadan appreciation for psychology, Ilistened to the experiences of oth-ers who did not have as easy andjoyful experience with meditationas I had. For I too, as if catching acontagion, felt fear, anger, hurt,and vulnerability, as I becomemore conscious of my personalproblems and the strife in theworld around me. I offeredinsights from the troubled mindto the peaceful, clear mind. Theygave me the opportunity to becaught for hours in my personalworld of conflict and fear, and Igave them a green light to be hon-est with themselves, as I experi-enced the change that such per-mission gives first-hand. All thedark shadow aspects of myselfwould rise up to be looked at, firstwith fear, then with acceptance,and finally, with a love for thetruth of my humanity.

As I became more honest, I sawhow I had lived almost three yearsin a country with a brutal and hor-rible civil war, carving out mysanctuary within seemingly pro-tected monastic walls. That was allan illusion. I was near death atleast once, having missed a bomb-ing by a couple of hours. I hadheard the shots of firing squadsconducting executions in the dis-tance. I had stuffed my fear. Withself-honesty, I saw that I hadgrown progressively weaker, dueto a malnourished diet. I hadintestinal problems and could nolonger live off the food that wasgiven to me as a monk. I neededto control my diet in order to sur-

20

Innovative/Wings

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Emmanuel Introduces

Phases of AwakeningA Spiritual Teaching

Assisted by Pat Rodegast& Rev. B.G. CohenIn Naples, Florida

Nov. 8-10 1996Birth: Entering the Illusion - Separation & Pain.

Jan. 17-19 1997Forgetting: Fear and the creation of the AlteredSelf as a solution to life.

Feb. 21-23 1997Remembering: Life as a “Spiritual Practice” inclaiming the True Self: Releasing History & Habit.

March 21-23 1997Integration of Human & Divine Self:Answering the Call of Love: Service & Freedom.

Tuition: $250 to be paid by the 1st of the month of each seminar,or $900 for all seminars paid by Nov. 1, 1996.

For Information: Contact B.G. Cohen, (212)737-8717Checks made payable and sent to:

B.G. Cohen, 420 E. 72 St. 15J, New York, NY, 10021.

*Emmanuel Phoenicia Retreat — July 14-18, 1997.P L E A S E T U R N T O PA G E 7 5

TransformationsContinued from page 19

D O N A T E AS U B S C R I P T I O N

When I first sent in for a sub-scription to your magazine, itwas because I really wanted tosubscribe and receive it. I am amother with four children,though I drive professionally inforty-eight states. However, I amin a position at present whichforces me to leave my drivingposition, to be at home full-time. Because of this, (my hus-band and I were team drivers)our income has been cut inhalf—from the not so great italready was. It takes a lot ofmiles to make any sort of a pay-check—splitting thirty cents amile along with the variousadded bills of supporting andraising a family. Therefore,because I don’t wish to have abill I cannot pay, (money feedsthe children) I must regretfullydecline getting your magazine. Ido hope you will understand.—Anita Barlow, Austin, Texas.

Editor’s Note: Every month, wereceive many letters like the oneabove. Publishing material thathelps heal and transform individ-ual’s lives naturally attracts peoplein need. We have gifted many withour publication, but the need fordiscounted or free subscriptions out-weighs our financial ability. Toremedy this, we have started“Friends Fund” for individuals thatare financially not able to pay for asubscription. If you would like tosponsor a person in need, please sendyour donations to Personal Trans-formation, Friends Fund, 4032South Lamar Blvd #500-137,Austin Texas 78704-7900.


Mount Madonna pickup fromV5N5 P19

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ReflectionsContinued from page 17

GOLDEN RATIOW O O D W O R K S

B U I L D E R O F F I N E B O D Y W O R K , T H E R A P Y A N D S PA E Q U I P M E N T

Honor Your PartnerIf you are like most people youdeal with a certain amount ofstress in your day to day life.Scientific studies have shown thattouch and massage can greatlyreduce levels of stress and engender a sense of well being. You do not need to be a trained professional in order to give or receive the benefits of massage. With the right tools

and instruction you can create anenvironment of mutual respectwhere family, partners and lovedones can enjoy a relaxing massage.

with the gift of massage

call today for a free catalog of products

1-800-345-1129

Massage TablesInstructional Videos

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P R E P A R EH U M A N I T Y

Congratulations on such a well-done publication. Your dream of“promoting the deepest kind ofpersonal and spiritual transforma-tion” is also mine, and it was withgreat joy that I read your maga-zine.

We know we are in the flowwhen these kinds of things cometo us and resonate with us at themost important levels of ourbeings—confirming that one is onthe right track and flowing withthe divine energies. The interviewwith Richard Moss was especiallyrich—and I had never heard ofhim before, now am looking for-ward to reading his books.

I received your Spring issue as agift while attending a conferencein Montreal hosted by DoctorsMarilyn and John Rossner, and Imust say it is being passed aroundhere with gratitude.

Whenever one of us of like mindgoes to the States, we stock up onwhat is on the stands at the book-store; your magazine was new to allof us, and we all love it. I am espe-cially grateful for your calendersection and look for more extensivelistings of events being held by var-ious organizations around thecountry.

Again, thank you and allinvolved for presenting theseinspiring and motivating articles.It helps people like me help in mysmall way to change the world.—Claudia Hilton, Nassau, Bahamas.

C L A S S A C T

I purchased the May-July issueof PERSONAL TRANSFORMATION (my


Life by DesignV5N5 P21

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first) as much for its form, as forits content. While many magazinedesigns are confusing, unattrac-tive, and hard to read, your maga-zine is a shining achievement. Thedesign is clean and fresh—it is avisual delight and eminently read-able. From heads and sub-heads totext, from photos to pull-quotes,everything says “class act.” Yourmagazine is an example of howgood typographic design not onlyenhances readability and commu-nication, but can be a delight tothe mind and eye, as well.—SteveMarston, Glen Oaks, New York.

S T R A I G H T W H I T E ?

I have decided not to re-orderPERSONAL TRANSFORMATION. Acouple of my clients commentedon something I had myselfnoticed. PERSONAL TRANSFORMA-TION is, in content, very white andstraight. While that does not nec-essarily translate to a negativemessage, there is certainly anopportunity for one to be per-ceived, if only by omission ofinclusion. PERSONAL TRANSFORMA-TION is the only publication in myoffice that anyone ever comment-ed negatively on. That is why I amremoving it. A spiritually—focused publication needs to workharder not to exclude the collec-tive majority in the metropolitanareas it strives to serve.—Namewithheld on request.

C O N G R U E N C EO F V A L U E S

I really enjoyed the last issue ofPERSONAL TRANSFORMATION. Ioften recognize a congruence ofmy values with the message of


Association for ResearchARE

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your publication, and this lastissue really accents our commonbond.

My best wishes to you and appre-ciation for the work you do sowell.—Brad Blanton, Stanley, Virginia.

I N T E G R I T Y

I just received the July-Septem-ber issue of PERSONAL TRANSFOR-MATION. I sell them in my store. AsI opened this issue, I turned to“From the Publisher” on pagefour. I need to tell you how muchI needed to hear your message.

I’ve been a waitress for twentyyears. But two years ago, I boughta book store. I have worked nightand day since then, running thestore and doing my waitress job.

As I began running the store, Ialso developed an integrity likeyou have with your magazine. Ionly carried things I felt were trueto soul work and that carried light.And like you, I could have made alot of money selling less than best.I also have a tendency to give awaya lot. So, needless to say, it’s beenhard. There never seemed to beenough money. So, I kept plug-ging along with my goal true inmy heart, and I also felt that evenif the store failed, I would havelearned so much, what would itmatter?

I turned to your article on pagefour, and I felt such a sense ofsharing and peace knowing thatthere are other people on missionsand who are true to their heartsand have the courage to changetheir name. I see you are slowlychanging from LOTUS to PERSONAL

TRANSFORMATION, just like I’mchanging the name of my bookstore to Spirit Matters because

24

Lucidity/Dream Link

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The Tao of Natural Breathing takes the reader on afascinating journey into the physiology, psychology,and spirituality of natural breathing. Dennis Lewisdraws on his many years of study in the GurdjieffWork, Advaita Vedanta, and the Healing Tao to show how we can incorporate natural (whole-body)breathing into our lives to improve our health,increase our energy, and support our quest for self-knowledge and inner growth.

“Lewis brings together in one book the psychosomaticvision, the scientific knowledge, and the vital practicesthat can help us discover the power of natural breath-ing to rejuvenate and transform our lives.”—MasterMantak Chia, founder of the International HealingTao, and author of Awaken Healing Light of the Tao.

Dennis Lewis is a student, teacher, and practitioner of Taoist and other approaches to healing and self-transformation.

Visa or M/C orders ($17.95/book), call toll free:1.888.313.5050 or call 415.282.4896. Fax: 415.641.7716. (CA residents add 8.5% sales tax.) Shipping:$3.00 first book, $1.00 each additional. To preview thebook, please visit our Internet site http://www.mountainwind.com

Mountain Wind Publishing PO Box 31376, San Francisco, CA 94131Distributed to the trade by Atrium Publishers Group

For Health, Well-Being and Inner Growth

By Dennis LewisForeword by Master Mantak Chia

THE Tao OFNATURAl BREATHING

26

Judith Orloff, M.D., is the assistant clinical professor of psychiatry at UCLA, and has worked as a psychic withlaw enforcement agencies and archaeological expeditions. Judith is a lecturer and workshop leader on

psychic and spiritual development and sees patients in her private practice in Los Angeles.The following interview is based on her new book “Second Sight” published by Warner Books.

A N I N T E R V I E W W I T H J U D I T H O R L O F F

B Y M A R Y N U R R I E S T E A R N S

Second Sight

PERSONAL TRANSFORMATION: I am pleased tointroduce “Second Sight” to our readers as your bookprepares us to acknowledge and develop our innate psychiccapacities. Legitimatizing the psychic has profoundimplications for health care as science and spirituality jointogether, allowing practitioners to utilize psychic capacitiesas a professional tool and to relate with the people they servein more loving ways.

Let’s begin with a discussion of how the psychic isstereotyped in this culture.

J U D I T H O R L O F F : There is a terrible negative stereo-type that goes along with anything psychic. The word con-gers up psychic phone lines or gypsy fortune tellers. Wedon’t connect the psychic with being a potent healing tooland a way to connect to spirituality and to our visionary side.Unfortunately, the image of the psychic has become tar-nished in our culture. Part of my role is to serve as a bridgebetween traditional medicine and the psychic, to legitimizethe psychic and make it holy again, as it ought to be.

What does being psychic mean?Psychic phone lines and gypsy fortune tellers are a small

and rather insignificant aspect of being psychic. What isreally significant is tapping into our inner resources to devel-op compassion and a vision for our own process. As a result,we develop empathy for other people and use our clarity tobetter the world, which is the true purpose of being psy-chic.

Why is being psychic both shamed and feared in this cul-ture?

As a psychic child, I grew up with a tremendous amountof shame, so much so that I never talked about it to anyone.I believed there was something wrong with me, that some-how I was colluding with the negative events I predicted. Igrew up with the shame that comes from the cultural lack ofacknowledgement of our visionary side and capacity to seeclairvoyantly. We are not trained to revere dreams or visions,unlike the aboriginal and the Native American cultures. Inthis country, we are indoctrinated into logical, rational, lin-ear thinking.

Being psychic is labeled as mentally ill. The American Psychiatric Association labels anything

psychic either as a sign of psychosis, a mental disorder, or asa sham. There is no acknowledgment that psychic ability isa healing tool and a powerful human legacy that we can alltap into.

Are there words synonymous to psychic that are perceived

27

Too manyindividuals haveexploited thepsychic as a meansto control ormanipulate, or forgreed. Is it anywonder, then, thatin much of Westernculture the termpsychic has falleninto disrepute?Sensationalized bythe press, scornedby traditionalscience, discountedby intellectuals, toagain be consideredholy, the psychicmust be redefinedin human terms. Itallows us to connectwith one anothermore deeply, withempathy andrespect, to jointogether as acollective force.


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as being more legitimate? When writing Second Sight, I struggled to find a stigma-

free vocabulary that would be accurate and embody the kindof message I wanted to communicate. I could not find one.I considered the words, psychic, intuitive, impressions,visionary, and sensitive. Intuitive is the word that therapeu-tic touch practitioners and other healers use to avoid theincredible stigma associated with the word, psychic. I don’tthink that intuition accurately characterizes the whole phe-nomena. Intuition is more general, like a gut feeling orhunch. In the psychic realm, we are able to see into our-selves and other people, and know very specific things. As weconnect with our heart, we are able to merge with peopleand gain access to their spirit. There is also psychic empa-thy, which is the ability to pick up and sense energy aroundthe body, and as a result, sense psychic input and even phys-ical symptoms from people.

In Webster’s New World Dictionary, the first definitionof psychic is “of the psyche or of the soul.” How is the psy-chic linked to spirituality?

The best way to tap into psychic ability is through med-itation. We have to find a silent place inside so that the psy-chic can come in. It doesn’t enter through the linear mind.In order to cultivate ourselves spiritually and to connect withthe divine, or the large mind, we have to be in a mode ofreceptivity. As we open and connect to spirit, clarity occurs,and as a result, we can pick up information that isn’t acces-sible otherwise.

Essentially, does being psychic mean we are able to pickup information?

Yes, it’s the ability to sense information and compassion.When we tune in spiritually, compassion and heart come,along with information. There are programs, like the SilvaMind Control, that teach psychic ability as a skill that can belearned without any kind of spiritual context. It is possible tolearn certain things in that way and to pick up information;but without a spiritual context, it is not possible to expand,and feel the extent of the spirit. As a result of a spiritual con-nection, wisdom—something greater than information—comes through.

In your book, you advise that we often need a teacher.What is the role of a teacher?

Teachers who have integrity can be pivotal. They canhelp us to open in ourselves, when alone we might flounder.I’ve had two main spiritual teachers in my life. Brugh Joy, myfirst teacher, helped me to realize that I can be a physician,a healer, a clairvoyant, and a sensitive—as he modeled being

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The purpose ofcultivatingourselvespsychically is toopen. And then toopen even more.With prescience,we come to knowourselves well,become moresensitive tofriends and family.Better able torespond to theirneeds, we can belovingly inharmony with ourrelationships. Thechoices we makebecome trulywell-informed,based on ourinnermost desires,not on someartificial notion ofwho we aresupposed to be.

SEPTEMBER — NOVEMBER 1996 • PERSONAL TRANSFORMATION

able to bridge those worlds. As a result of his capac-ity to channel energy, I was given the ability to feelenergy and to know that it is real. He guided meinto places that I probably couldn’t have gotten toon my own, because of my own resistance.

You make it clear in “Second Sight” that beingpsychic is an aspect of our spirituality. You discusstools to help develop spirituality, including the useof an altar. How do altars facilitate spiritual devel-opment?

The altar is a sacred space in our home that wecreate for ourselves. My altar is very simple. It is alittle table covered with beautiful fabric. I have can-dles, incense, a statue of Kahn Yin, the Goddess ofCompassion, and a picture of my father, to bringhim energy and share my love with him. When mymother was dying, I had her photograph there, toenhance our connection. An altar is a place wherewe can attune to spirit. It shouldn’t be in the mainthoroughfare of our home, and we shouldn’t parademany people by it. It is a place where spiritual powercan build, and where we can go for solace andreplenishment. When it’s not possible to meditateelsewhere, because our mind is talking loudly or weare otherwise distracted, we can go to our altars. Ibelieve strongly in altars.

You said that the energy surrounding an altarhelps to induce an interior focus and that the psy-chic thrives when attention is drawn inward.

Exactly. Altars create a vortex of energy. Whenwe meditate in the same place day after day, energybuilds in that spot, which makes it easier to get intothe rhythm of meditation.

An altar supports the discipline of meditation.Yes, when we practice regularly, we train our-

selves to tune into spirit. If we meditate once amonth, rather than every day for at least a few min-utes, it is difficult to shift our attention away fromour active minds to the realm of the invisible and toalign ourselves with spirit. The more frequently wemeditate, the easier it becomes, and the more wecan be taught by spirit. We have to devote disci-plined time every day to sit and honor spirit and toallow ourselves to be taught.

How do rituals enhance spiritual practice andthe development of psychic capacity?

Ritual is a way of focusing, and focus is very pow-

erful. When focus is achieved, energy is heightened.If done with sincerity, attention, and humility, cre-ating rituals can hone our clairvoyant abilities, aswell as our connection to spirit. In the book, I talkabout a patient who was unable to tune into herintuitive voice. I suggested she make a circle ofstones on the beach and sit there for a long time. Asa result of sitting and meditating, she was able totune into her intuitive voice and hear it as a reality,something she knew in the cells of her body. Theritual acted as a focus for her to get in touch withher own truths. Ritual is a structure that facilitatesopening and helps us to hear our truths, which canbe obscured in other circumstances.

This example of ritual reveals that the psychicrealm isn’t something that just gives us informa-tion about others; it also helps us hear our owninner truths. Our culture does not realize thathelping ourselves is one of the great benefits ofbeing psychic.

Yes, we help ourselves, then we can help others.The psychic is to be used for service.

How is prayer a tool for developing the psychic? I consider prayer to be a psychic phenomenon,

although it’s never defined as such. Prayer creates achannel for direct communication with spirit.Prayer is important because it is our way of appeal-ing to a greater, higher power, for help in our livesor for good in the world. Through prayer, we can beheard, and we can facilitate change. It softens andopens our hearts, allowing us to merge with spiritand to hear the responses given. Prayer is wonder-ful in that it may be answered in ways that we don’tanticipate. “Thy will be done” is my favorite prayer.I believe it is the most appropriate prayer, althoughsometimes I do feel it is appropriate to ask for a spe-cific thing, depending on the situation. I prayedspecifically for help with my father when he seven-ty-five years old and about to embark upon an elab-orate orthopedic surgery for his back. He would notlisten to my reasoning. I prayed for an interventionso my father could hear me or open to the possibil-ity of not having surgery. I forgot about the prayer.Later that day, my cousin, an orthopedic surgeon,called from Ohio to announce that he was comingto Los Angeles. He proposed an alternative tosurgery, which my father accepted. Sometimes,


prayer works that way. There are also occasionswhen our prayers are not answered as we desire atthe time. I have prayed for certain things in my lifethat I am really happy I did not receive.

What other tools help us to connect with the psy-chic and spirituality?

Dreaming is the most natural conduit for thepsychic that we have, simply because our egos don’tget in the way. We can travel to different realms andtune into various nonphysical spaces in dreams. Wedream every night, and dreams are our main accessto spirit. To remember dreams, we can create adream journal where we record our inner workings.Dreams are illusive and tend to drift away. Docu-menting dreams is very important. It is also helpful,upon awakening in the morning, rather than boltingout of bed, to stay in what is called a hypnogogicstate, the luxurious state between sleep and waking,during which the dream images are alive and can beretrieved and worked with.

What is the difference between psychic and psy-chological dreams?

Psychological dreams help us to identify psycho-logical processes revolving around anxiety, depres-sion, and anger. They help us to grow psychologi-cally by pointing out our shortcomings so we canwork on them. Psychological dreams are wonderful.They make up the bulk of our dreams because wehave so much work to do on the psychological level,and it’s really important that we do that work. Manyspiritual practices don’t focus on psychologicalwork, but it is extremely important, because as wework through our own issues, we become moretransparent psychically. We gain clarity internallyand connect to spirit as we work through our ownissues. Psychological dreams help us to identifythese areas in which we’re blocked. Anxiety dreams,such as running to get away from someone who ispursuing us, reveal that some aspect of ourselves ispursuing us and scaring us, and we need to identifywhat that is. Psychological dreams help to uncoverour fears, angers, and griefs so that we can releasethem. They also help us to recall childhood traumasso we can work through them. Psychic dreams are abit different. They don’t necessarily help us workout our psychological issues. They give certaininformation to help us concretely in our lives. Spe-

cific guidance dreams, when listened to, give won-derful advice. Unfortunately, we’re not trained tolisten to these dreams in our culture.

How can we recognize psychic dreams? You saidthat they are impersonal, crystal clear, and have awitness quality.

Yes. They come through without the same kindof emotional charge that psychological dreams have,and sometimes they give us very specific informa-tion. For instance, I was told in a dream that I wasto go to medical school to become a psychiatrist inorder to have the credentials necessary to legitimizethe psychic realm. The psychic comes through forme in a genderless voice. It is simply information. Itis not an uncaring voice, but it is neutral. We can lis-ten to those voices in our dreams that inform usabout the direction we need to go in, people in ourlives, how we can help others, or how we can heal.The information either comes through words or istransmitted telepathically through metaphor. Whenthe psychic comes through metaphor, we have tointuitively interpret our dreams, and that’s where ateacher can be most helpful. There are also dreamswhich actually heal us.

Yes, please talk about healing dreams.I believe that energy transmitted through dreams

helps with physical healing and emotional healing.A friend of mine, a psychologist and clairvoyant,had a lipoma, a fatty benign tumor, and dreamedthat this huge syringe went in and sucked the sub-stance out of the lipoma. She was literally physical-ly healed. That’s a rare circumstance; nevertheless itcan happen.

Common examples of healing dreams are thosethat occur following divorce, death of a loved one,or surgery.

Yes. Spirit can work through us and talk to us indreams much more easily than in the physical worldbecause we’re more open. Our defenses aren’t oper-ating, so we are not as critical or filled with precon-ceptions about what can happen. Openness is criti-cal. We have to have a beginner’s mind and the won-derment and freshness of a child. As we approachthe psychic realm, we want to be more like children,but utilize the wisdom and scrutiny we have asadults.

How can we elicit guidance dreams?


First, we have to allow for the possibility that they arevalid. We must believe they are real, in order to allow ourlife to be guided. We all have guidance and protection.Unfortunately, we don’t think about it, are not told about it,and don’t know how to listen to the guidance. Guidancecomes through very specifically, but it might not be practi-cal, so we may have a difficult time with it. When I had thedream to go to medical school, it was the last thing I want-ed to do. I could have ignored it and gone my own way. For-tunately, I knew enough to listen, so I bargained with myselfto enroll in one course to see how it went. When guidancedreams seem impractical, give them a chance and see if thereis energy to propel you further along the course that thedream is outlining.

In the book, you also suggested writing questions youwant guidance about and placing the paper near your bed.

That’s a good ritual. Questions need to be specific andfrom the heart, not intellectual concerns. The spirit withwhich one asks the question is important, so with purity ofspirit, write your question, and put it by the bed. Speak yourquestion out loud, then let it go, and give it to spirit. Allowthe dream to come, and document it the next day. If theanswer is not clear on the first day, keep doing that for abouta week, and the answer will be there.

You teach people to use remote viewing. How can remoteviewing help us?

Remote viewing is a teachable technique that has beenused at the Stanford Research Institute and at the Mobiusgroup where I worked. It is a formalized psychic reading. Aremote viewing occurs when you tune into a remote target,such as a specific geographical locale or a person, and in ameditative state, allow without efforting at all, psychicimpressions and information to come about the location orperson. This is about allowing, not efforting. Setting asidelogical, analytical life, and allowing the emptiness associat-ed with receptivity helps the information to make itselfknown.

I had a patient, a film producer, who wanted to learn totrust himself. He was in a bad place, doing films he hated.He felt that his creativity was being sapped because he was-n’t listening to his intuition about what he should do. Thebulk of our work consisted of teaching him how to meditate,to go into that intuitive place, and once there, to do remoteviewing on projects and people, in order to use his intuitiveabilities along with his other skills to select projects andwork associates. I taught him to tune in to people and pick

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It may be that wemust recover ourwisdom gracefully,let it emerge in itsown time.Dreaming canfacilitate this. Apristine state ofawareness, it is adirect line to a placewhere alchemicalgold abounds andnothing is devoid ofmeaning. Here,time and space arenonexistent;anything is possible.Specific guidancefor living your lifewell lies in yourdreams. Like ablank canvas, theyprovide a mediumwhere both thepsychic and yourunconscious canfreely expressthemselves.


up information about them to help him determineif they were compatible to work with him. He usesremote viewing in his work now, as a matter ofcourse. He tunes in intuitively to get information, sodecisions are not arbitrary. For instance, if he’s hir-ing a director, he does remote viewings on candi-dates to get impressions about each person. Hechecks his impressions for accuracy when he meetsthe people. It has really helped him pick people heresonates with.

What about remote viewings and ethics? Whenwe have the capacity to gain information aboutother people, how do we not misuse that kind ofpower? Do we need permission to do a remote view-ing on someone?

One form of permission is to directly ask a per-son for permission to tune in to them. Another wayis to ask for permission on an inner level. Oftentimes, when I’m tuning in to someone, I get a brickwall, or a barrier, that says do not go further, let itbe. This person needs privacy. There is integritybased on the openness of people. When peopledon’t want to be seen, it’s not possible to tune in tothem. There is an operational system on an innerlevel. Not everyone is psychically open and vulner-able to being seen. Ethics is also the attitude withwhich we approach any project. There needs to bea sacredness in what we do and a sense of respectwoven into remote viewings.

Psychic healing and laying on of hands are psy-chic abilities. How can we develop these capacities,for the sake of loved ones, patients, and ourselves?

The basis for laying on of hands is that the powerof love can be transmitted through touch. We allhave the capacity to heal one another and to balanceone another’s energy. There are specific ways oftuning in to love through meditation and prayer, byasking for spirit to come through us. We are chan-nels. It is not our personal energy that brings heal-ing. If we are open, believe in spirit, and are com-mitted to love, love can be channeled through ourhuman instruments to help each other. Psychichealing is incredible because it gives the personbeing healed a first hand experience of the energy sothat they can access it in themselves. Balancingenergies in our body facilitates both physical and

emotional healing, but energy balancing alone willnot usually do the healing. The person must take anactive part in their own healing process.

The power of expressing love through touch isprofound. We are such a touch-starved people. It isso beneficial to touch our child’s scraped knees andto hug our spouse when he or she comes home fromwork stressed. Simple, loving touch is a psychicprocess. Realizing this can help legitimize beingpsychic.

Exactly. Look at mothers’ instincts to hold chil-dren. Why do mothers hold their children? Becausethey’re transmitting loving energy, which is heal-ing. That doctors and counselors are taught not totouch their patients is misguided. Clear, non-sexu-al touch is a healing tool. When used with respectand sensitivity, touch is powerful. We can all touchwith care and awareness. The key is the conscious-ness that must accompany the touch.

How do we recognize the psychic experience ineveryday life?

Look for synchronicities in life, rather than dis-miss them as random coincidences. The whole con-cept of coincidence needs to be re-defined. We missso much under that umbrella. Begin to look at syn-chronicity as a way of life. When we identify syn-chronicities in our lives, no matter how small, wegrow in aware of synchronicity as a psychic phe-nomenon. Synchronicities can act to guide us in ourlives.

First, we have to recognize and legitimize syn-chronicity.

Honor synchronicity as a guidepost, and don’tdismiss it. The same is true of deja vu, an experienceof feeling as if you’ve known someone before,although you haven’t met them previously, or goinginto a building and feeling you’ve been there before.Explore deja vu, feeling where that takes you, seewhat memories are invoked, discover what thesepeople have to say to you even if you don’t knowthem or are not interested in them intellectually.

What is psychic empathy?This is the ability to pick up energy and to

empathize with people, to feel what is going on inthem emotionally, physically, or spiritually. We allhave the capacity to do this. Sometimes, people feel


inundated by psychic empathy. As a child, I could-n’t go into big shopping malls and didn’t like goingto parties because I would leave exhausted and notknow why. When we go into places with many peo-ple, we pick up a lot of energy. If we are psychicallyreceptive, we can feel bombarded. Some psychicsensitives aren’t aware of what is happening andinternalize the energy, resulting in an agoraphobiawhere they don’t want to go out of the house. Whenwe pick up energy, we open ourselves to the wholeenvironment and can expand our capacity for love,but we need to know how to deal with it so that wedon’t internalize it. You can share love with peoplethrough psychic empathy, even at the checkoutstand in the market. In your heart space, you cansend and pick up love without saying a word. Psy-chic empathy is a way to generate and to receivelove.

How can we recognize when we are experiencingsomeone else’s sensations and deal with them, sothat we are not overwhelmed?

If you stand next to someone and want to movecloser and feel invited into their space, you havepicked up their energy. Alternatively, if you standnext to someone and suddenly feel nauseous,depressed, or anxious, you might be picking up theirsensations. One sure way to tell is to move away. Ifthe feelings are someone else’s, they will subside.We can train ourselves by asking questions abouthow it feels to be in the world, and how it feels to bearound other human beings. Look at the world as alaboratory and see what you sense around variouspeople—what gives you energy and what depletesyou? Know if you pick up physical symptoms. If youare around someone who has a backache, do yousuddenly have a backache? If we are unaware, empa-thy is an unconscious process, and we have no ideawhat’s going on in our lives. Once we see it as real-ity, we can work with it. Psychic empathy is a way toconnect with the collective in a powerful way if weopen ourselves to it. Without preparation, we canpick up physical or emotional symptoms andbecome ill or distraught. Many psychic sensitivesfeel that picking up symptoms is the only way toheal people. I strongly disagree. I don’t think it’s

necessary. We must learn through meditation howto let energy come in and go out of our bodies with-out it remaining or harming us.

How else can we recognize psychic in everydaylife?

If we have a strong sense about something thatcomes to us out of the blue, for instance, if we sensethat a loved one is in danger, we need to registerthe information, reality check its accuracy, and acton it. We need to listen to and honor the intuitive asit works its way through our being each day.

Does taking action enhance and develop psychiccapacity?

Yes, taking action reinforces psychic. Being psy-chic is about sensing and taking action.

Is there anything else you want to add?In this process, it is important to not give away

your own power. Many people tend to do this. Peo-ple come to me wanting to set me up as an author-ity who will tell them what to do, which is the lastthing I want to do. Therapists need to be aware ofthis because it can be seductive when people putyou up on this pedestal, which is not appropriate orhelpful. They think you have all this power, andthey don’t want to develop their own power. Therole of the psychic therapist is to always mirror backa person’s own power and never attempt to do thework for them.

One of the benefits of developing psychic capac-ity is our own empowerment, so that we no longerlook for an external fix.

Exactly. This is an inside job here, going inwardand connecting to our own spirit, realizing that spir-it works in our lives and harmonizing with spirit,for developing ourselves and then helping others.

If we all developed our innate psychic capacity,what would be the impact on family and commu-nity?

It would be tremendous. The whole world wouldchange. If people would open to their innerinstincts, connect with spirit, and have the commit-ment to work through their own darker issues, sothey are not projecting everything on the outside,we would see a huge difference. We would be akinder, more loving humanity.•


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Imagination andYour Inner Self

G L O R I A C H A D W I C K

You already know that your mind speaks to you in images, rather than words. The thoughts you

hear and the pictures you see in your mind originate in your imagination—the magical world of

your inner images. Your imagination is where you can rediscover the real you, where you can be

totally free to simply be who you really are. It’s where you can reconnect with your true spiritual

nature. PHOTO: MUSE BY SUSAN SLOTTER. SEE RESOURCE SECTION

PAGE 69 FOR GREETING CARD INFORMATION.

Gloria Chadwick has been a teacher of mind power, med-itation and dream work for over 25 years. Gloria is theauthor of “Somewhere Over the Rainbow: A Soul’s Jour-ney Home,” “Discovering Your Past Lives,” and a forth-coming book “Reflections” She lives in Chicago with hertwo daughters.

Until now, maybe you’ve thoughtthat only what you perceive withyour conscious mind is what isreal. While this is true, that’s justhalf of it. There’s another worldthat’s also very real and is waitingto show you what’s within your-

self. It may seem that reality only revolves aroundyour conscious mind and your physical senses, but italso continually swirls through your subconsciousawareness, coming up to the surface and showingitself in your thoughts and ideas, your feelings, andyour dreams. Maybe, you’ve had experiences inwhich an answer or an insight sparkled into yourmind out of the clear blue sky—your inner, spiritu-al self was whispering to you through your thoughtsand intuition. And perhaps, there were times wherea dream was unusually clear and vivid—a dream thatseemed to be more than just a dream.

Intellectually and intuitively, you’re aware ofboth your conscious and subconscious perceptions.In the everyday work world and just taking care oflife in general, we tend to clutter up our thoughtswith meaningless mind chatter and mundane things,and we often bury our real feelings under layers ofmask and pretense. We’re so surrounded by physi-cal chaos and noise, and the shoulds that societyimposes upon us, that we don’t pay attention to ourmore subtle, inner sense of awareness. We’re sobusy scattering our thoughts and energies and run-ning around doing things that we can’t even hearourselves think. Underneath the facade of what wecall reality is the true real world—the real us.

Once we let go of outside distractions and tuneinto our subconscious, we can be in touch with our-selves and see that our inner self and our higher self

are one and the same. We can bring that inner, moreperceptive awareness of our true spiritual natureinto our everyday world and know what’s really hap-pening beneath the hustle and bustle. We can be inboth worlds simultaneously. When we take the timeto relax—to just be natural, to be who we really are,to just be—we’re able to direct our attention into aquiet, gentle part of ourselves. There, we can listento our thoughts and allow our feelings to speakclearly. We can look at what we hear and know thetrue awareness of our spirit.

So come and explore this magical world of yourimagination, and watch your mystical mind inmotion. You may see that your imagination is morereal than you think it is. And you may be in for a fewsurprises as you reconnect with your inner self andreunite with your higher self—the one who speaksto you through your feelings, the one who whispersspiritual knowledge into your mind.

Just by stretching your imagination and openingup your mind, you can become so much more awareof the worlds within you and around you. Reality ismore than it appears to be on the surface, and yourimagination will show this to you. Take some timefor yourself and relax. Let your magical mind beyour guide through the world of your inner images.Somewhere inside yourself, you’ll touch your truefeelings and rediscover the magic of the real you—the magic of your inner spiritual self. And if you lis-ten, you’ll be able to hear a voice that whispers toyou—your inner voice that’s real and true, the voicethat always speaks the truth.

MIND-POWER EXERCISES

1. Create a special place—a quiet, tranquil naturescene—in your mind that’s all your own. A placewhere you feel completely comfortable and natural,where you enjoy being peaceful, calm, and happywithin yourself. A magical place where you can trulybe who you really are, where you can tune into yourinner self and listen to your inner voice. A spiritualsanctuary where you can connect with your truespiritual nature and experience harmony withinyourself, where you can open up the completeawareness of your mind.

Your nature scene can be a beach, where you canlisten to the sound of the waves and watch them as



they gently ebb and flow. It canbe a forest, where you can hearthe wind gently moving throughthe leaves in the trees, whisper-ing to you. It can be a wide openexpanse of earth, where you canview the horizon clearly in alldirections. It can be a mountainor a valley. It can be a lake,where you can go sailing, or awonderful waterfall. It can be agarden with very beautiful flow-ers. It can be a rainbow, it canbe the sky, it can be the sun, or itcan simply be the air that youbreathe. Your nature scene canbe wherever and whatever youwant it to be.

It can be reminiscent of aplace you’ve been before, or itcan be a place that you createentirely with your imagination.Think about the kind of placeyou’d like to have as your naturescene. Close your eyes and cre-ate a picture in your mind of theplace that would make you mosthappy. When you’ve got a goodpicture in your mind, be there—create that scene. You may findan exact replica of your con-scious thoughts, or you may findthat you create a different scene,once you’re inside the magical,mystical world of your imagina-tion. Whatever you see and cre-ate is the most perfect naturescene for you.

When you’ve created your nature scene, just bethere for a while to enjoy it and to appreciate nature.Tune into your feelings, reconnect with your innerself—your real spiritual self—and listen to yourinner voice. Hear what it sounds like, and how itspeaks to you.

2. After you’ve been in your nature scene sever-al times, notice how you feel when you’re there,what you do and what you think about. Thorough-

ly explore your nature scene.Notice everything that’s there.Notice any previous connectionsto pleasant and positive experi-ences in your life. See the sym-bology in it and what it repre-sents to you by exploring yourfeelings about it. Become awareof why these connections aresurfacing in your nature scene.

3. Aside from the obviousbenefits of being able to go intoyour nature scene at any time tojust relax for a few moments, tofeel peace and harmony, torefresh and revitalize yourself, orto let go of stress and tensionthat may build up during yourday, your nature scene gives youthe opportunity to quietly reflecton the things that are happeningin your life. You can look withinyourself to see how and whyyour experiences originated. Youcan find solutions to problemsand answers to any questions youpose. Listen to your inner voice,to your true feelings. Talk toyour inner self—your higher self.Ask for guidance. Trust theinformation that comes fromyour inner knowledge and act onthe information given.

4. Your nature scene is muchmore than it appears to be. It istruly a real, magical place withinyou that opens up into manywonderful worlds that offer you

insight and understanding into yourself; worlds thatopen up into universal knowledge; worlds that showyou your mystical mind—your spiritual essence.Explore those worlds.•

From “Spirituality and Self-Empowerment” by GloriaChadwick. Copyright 1995 by Gloria Chadwick. Printedwith permission from Gloria Chadwick. Published byContemporary Books.

Just bystretching yourimaginationand openingup your mind,you canbecome somuch moreaware of theworlds withinyou andaround you.Reality is morethan it appearsto be on thesurface,and yourimaginationwill show thisto you.

A Father forEvery Child

D A V I D B L A N K E N H O R N

The most urgent domestic challenge facing the United States at the close of the twentieth centu-

ry is the re-creation of fatherhood as a vital social role for men. At stake is nothing less than the

success of the American experiment. For unless we reverse the trend of fatherlessness, no other set

of accomplishments—not economic growth or prison construction or welfare reform or better

schools—will succeed in arresting the decline of child well-being and the spread of male violence. To

tolerate the trend of fatherlessness is to accept the inevitability of continued societal recession.

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David Blankenhorn is founder and president of the Insti-tute for American Values, a private, nonpartisan orga-nization devoted to research, publication, and public edu-cation on family issues. He is a frequent lecturer and chiefeditor of “Rebuilding the Nest: A New Commitment tothe American Family.”

Many voices today, includ-ing many expert voices,urge us to accept thedecline of fatherhoodwith equanimity. Be real-istic, they tell us. Divorceand out -o f -wed lock

childbearing are here to stay. Growing numbers ofchildren will not have fathers. Nothing can be doneto reverse the trend itself. The only solution is toremediate some of its consequences. More help forpoor children. More sympathy for single mothers.Better divorce. More child-support payments. More

prisons. More programs aimed at substituting forfathers.

Yet what Lincoln called the better angels of ournature have always guided us in the opposite direc-tion. Passivity in the face of crisis is inconsistentwith the American tradition. Managing decline hasnever been the hallmark of American expertise. Inthe inevitable and valuable tension between condi-tions and aspirations—between the social “is” andthe moral “ought”—our birthright as Americans hasalways been our confidence that we can change forthe better.

Does every child deserve a father? Our currentanswer hovers between “no” and “not necessarily.”But we need not make permanent the lowering ofour standards. We can change our minds. More-over, we can change our minds without passing newlaws, spending more tax dollars, or impaneling moreexpert commissions. Once we change our philoso-phy, we may well decide to pass laws, create pro-grams, or commission research. But the first andmost important thing to change is not our policies,but our ideas.

Our essential goal must be the rediscovery inmodern society of the fatherhood idea. Malinowskicalled it the “principle of legitimacy.” For everychild, a legally and morally responsible adult male.Others have described this idea as the imperative ofpaternal investment, achieved through a parentalalliance with the mother. A more familiar name forsuch activity is married fatherhood.

The essence of the fatherhood idea is simple. Afather for every child. But in our society, few ideascould be more radical. Embracing the fatherhoodidea would require a fundamental shift in culturalvalues and in parental behavior. No other change inU.S. family life could produce such dramaticimprovement in child and societal well-being.

To recover the fatherhood idea, we must fashiona new cultural story of fatherhood. The moral oftoday’s story is that fatherhood is superfluous. Themoral of the new story must be that fatherhood isessential. In today’s script, the Unnecessary Fatherdominates the action. In addition, too many under-studies are doing far too much. The star of the new


script must be the Good Family Man. The understudiesmust leave the spotlight.

The new story will be simultaneously more positive andmore negative, more celebratory and more reproachful, thantoday’s anemic account of unimportant men. The goodnews, largely ignored in today’s script, is that married father-hood is a man’s most important pathway to happiness. Beinga loving husband and committed father is the best part ofbeing a man. The bad news, similarly missing from today’swatered-down narrative, is that high rates of divorce andout-of-wedlock childbearing, the twin generators of pater-nity without fatherhood, are incompatible with male happi-ness and societal success.

At the intellectual center of the new story, defining andsustaining the fatherhood idea, must be two propositionsabout men. The first is that marriage constitutes an irre-placeable life-support system for effective fatherhood. Thesecond is that being a real man means being a good father.The first proposition aims to reconnect fathers and mothers.The second aims to reconnect fatherhood and masculinity.Both of these propositions carry profound societal implica-tions. Each will powerfully shape the plot and characters ofan invigorated cultural story.

In a large sense, the new story must help us change froma divorce culture to a marriage culture. In a divorce culture,divorce overshadows marriage as a defining metaphor forthe male-female relationship. Divorce comes to be seen asmodern, cutting-edge, a representative generational experi-ence. The institution of marriage and the norm of maritalpermanence come to be seen as comparatively old-fash-ioned, beleaguered, even quaint—a way of life primarilysuitable for older or boring people.

In a divorce culture, people are intensely interested indivorce and want to improve divorce. Family scholars studyit. Children’s books tell stories about it. Policy makers pur-sue the goal of better divorce. In contrast, marriage com-mands relatively little attention in a divorce culture. Eventhe primary custodians of the marital tradition—the clergyand marriage counselors—frequently lose their regard forthat tradition and drift toward a preoccupation with divorce.

For a basic contradiction defines our contemporarydivorce culture. On the one hand, we are a marrying people.Indeed, American attitudes toward marriage remain dis-tinctly romantic and even sentimental, especially regardingthe potential in marriage for personal fulfillment and adult

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Our essential goalmust be therediscovery inmodern society ofthe fatherhoodidea. Malinowskicalled it the“principle oflegitimacy.” Forevery child, alegally and morallyresponsible adultmale… To recoverthe fatherhoodidea, we mustfashion a newcultural story offatherhood. Themoral of today’sstory is thatfatherhood issuperfluous. Themoral of the newstory must be thatfatherhood isessential.



companionship. Yet at the same time, we are a soci-ety in the midst of a widespread collapse of confi-dence in marriage as an institution, in the ideal ofmarital permanence, and in the preeminence andnecessity of marriage as a child-rearing environ-ment.

In short, while we believe in marrying, we arelosing our belief in the institution of marriage. As aresult, we are simultaneously institutionalizingdivorce and deinstitutionalizing marriage. Fordivorce, our goals are to regularize it, destigmatizeit, and improve its procedures. For marriage, ourgoals are the opposite. Deregulate and privatize it.Make it more flexible. Reduce its privileged legalstatus and cultural influence. Describe it in highschool textbooks not as an ideal, but as one of manyoptions. In a divorce culture, marriage is increas-ingly viewed as a problem, divorce as a viable solu-tion.

This view of marriage destroys fatherhood formillions of men. By normalizing the rupture of theparental alliance and the departure of men fromtheir children’s homes, the norms of a divorce cul-ture decimate the foundations of good-enoughfatherhood. To recover the fatherhood idea, wemust recreate a marriage culture. The alternative isthe continuing decline of fatherhood.

A stronger story of fatherhood must also reclaimand revise the connection between fatherhood andmasculinity. Across cultures, as David D. Gilmorereminds us, manhood is regarded as a test, a chal-lenge, a prize to be won. In general, societies assumethat women possess traits of femininity. But menmust typically “prove” their masculinity. Of course,elite opinion today is frequently quite suspicious ofthis idea. Yet, for most men in our society, to “be aman” remains a matter of considerable importance.

Tragically, the weakening of fatherhood in ourgeneration has produced a large and dangerouschasm between fatherhood and masculinity. Overhere is the manhood test. Over there is fatherhood.Consequently, to “be a man” increasingly has verylittle to do with being a father.

In today’s elite fatherhood script, the New Fatherconstitutes an androgynous rejection of all tradi-

tional masculinity. As a cultural model, the NewFather urges men simply to ignore or ridicule themanhood test.

The New Father is expected to define his mas-culinity by either disavowing it or inverting it. As aresult, the New Father model explicitly compelsmen to make a choice: Be a New Father or be aman. The pathway to the former is the rejection ofthe latter.

A similar split is occurring in popular culture andin the larger society. From Arnold Schwarzenegger-style fantasy movies of male omnipotence to theteen-age gang culture in our central cities, the ideaof “being a man” is increasingly identified with vio-lence, materialism, and predatory sexual behavior. Iam a man because I will hurt you if you disrespectme. I am a man because I have sex with lots ofwomen, and my girl friends have my babies. I am aman because I have more money and more thingsthan you do. Norms of good-enough fatherhood—I am a man because I cherish my wife and nurturemy children—are simply not part of this manhoodequation.

If our society forces men to choose between pass-ing the New Father test and passing the manhoodtest, one result will be less fatherhood. Similarly, ifwe encourage men to pursue a manhood that isuntempered by norms of responsible fatherhood,the primary results will be more violence and lessfatherhood. The former urges fatherhood withoutmasculinity. The latter stands for masculinity with-out fatherhood.

The challenge for a new story of fatherhood is toresocialize masculinity by reuniting it with father-hood, recognizing that these two ideas for menstand best when they stand together. Fatherhoodcannot destroy or oppose masculinity. But father-hood must domesticate masculinity. In a good soci-ety, men prove their manhood by being goodfathers. The alternative is the continuing decline offatherhood and a deepening ambivalence and skep-ticism toward masculinity.•

From “Fatherless America” by David Blankenhorn.Copyright 1995 by Institute for American Values.Printed with permission from Harper Perennial.

41

Ethical ChoicesJ E F F R E Y P A T N A U D E

An ancient Japanese parable tells of a samurai master constantly challenged by a student who

sought a level of equality with his teacher. The master understood the needs of the young learner

and remained patient with him as the student provoked a confrontation at every opportunity.

Frustrated by his inability to thwart his teacher, the student conceived a foolproof way finally to con-

quer his master. Holding a baby bird, he presented his cupped hands to his master and asked, “Is

the bird in my hands dead, or is it alive?” The master knew if he guessed the bird was dead, the

student would open his hands and let the bird fly away. If he said it was alive, a quick squeeze of

the student’s hands would break the creature’s neck, and he would present to the master a dead bird.

The master simply looked into the eye of his challenger and said, “It is whatever you choose it to be.”IMA

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Jeffrey Patnaude began his career as an Episcopalianpriest, heading two large suburban parishes. Intrigued bythe possibility of applying his spiritual training to thebusiness world, he left parish ministry in the late 1980sto found an organization that works with business lead-ers to help bring “spirit to work.” Jeffrey lives in North-ern California with his dog, Bear.

Choice is at the center of our being as itconfronts us at every turn of life’slabyrinth. We can choose to cut cor-ners or jump over the lines to reachthe maze’s center. The choice is ours.The wandering tribes of ancient Israel

were no strangers to the circuitous path of thelabyrinth. Tradition says that they wandered a desertpath for many years before receiving a vision oftheir destiny. Just before his death, Moses, who hadled them out of Egypt and away from the pharaoh’styranny, stood before them and spoke of the respon-sibilities inherent in their freedom to choose whatlay ahead:

This day, I have set before you life anddeath, blessings and curse; thereforechoose life so that you and your descen-dants may live. (Deut. 30:19)

As in the last hopeful words of a dying parent tohis children, Moses wanted what was best for hisfollowers who had traveled so far, yet he knew thechoice would be theirs to make.

Choice lies at the heart of inner management.Living a life of balance, for example, requires theability to make choices and to say no—and yes.Making use of our expansive imagination involves aconscious decision not to be limited by the confinesof a narrow perception, but instead to be willing tosoar into the uncharted territory of the humanmind. Employing intuition means choosing to payattention to the wisdom within ourselves that speakswithout words. Living a life of joy requires a deci-sion to embrace all of life, pain and pleasure, asequal components of wholeness. Authentic powerresults from making choices that are aligned withcompassion—not fear.

THINKING POSITIVELY

We can encourage positive thinking patterns orcling to the banister of negativity, from which weslide downward into the shadow. Negative thinkingcan create self-fulfilling prophecies. It increasesstress, facilitates depression, and chokes creativity. Itdiminishes our self-esteem, as it does our ability tocope effectively with problems and challenges.

Choosing to harbor negative thinking also hasdisastrous consequences in the work world. I onceworked with a friend who repeatedly told himself,unconsciously, that his important projects weredoomed to fail. I tried to talk him out of it, but nomatter how I assured him, his fear of failure heldhim intent in the belief that he would not, couldnot, succeed. Not surprisingly, many of his projectsfailed, and eventually his company couldn’t afford tokeep him. He was like the man who sits on a benchin New York’s Grand Central Station, throwingsawdust in the air to keep the elephants away. Whensomeone points out to him that there are no ele-phants in Grand Central Station, he says, “See? It’sworking!” The elephants for my friend were his


images of colossal failure, andeventually he became failure’sown best exhibit, never con-vinced that he had anotherchoice.

Each choice cultivates a habit,as well as a direction. My friendwho had programmed himselffor failure was living in reactionto a cynical interior monologue,a self-punishing habit that des-tined him for failure. It causedhim to focus on the gap betweenhis ambitions and his presentconditions, rather than thebridge of possibility that wasthere for him to cross. By sur-rendering to negative expecta-tions, he had already fulfilledthem.

Negative thinking leads totwo especially self-defeatinghabits. The first is the tendencyto base our responses on untest-ed assumptions (such as the pos-sibility of failure), as if they arefact. The other is the habit ofhaving constant second thoughtsabout our decisions.

With respect to the firsthabit, as leaders, it is far moreeffective to refuse to respond toanything other than objectiveand demonstrable facts. Withrespect to the latter, there is nopoint in speculating about whatcould have been, when you areconfronted with what is. Everychoice automatically creates again and a loss, a selected path,and a road not taken. When we do act, we musthave faith that our foundation for leadership is firmenough that we will, in general, choose well.

Mark Twain spoke wisely when he said, “Lifedoes not consist mainly, or even largely, of facts andevents. It consists in the main of the storm ofthoughts that are forever blowing through one’s

head.” We can’t stop our ownthought storm, the creative forceof our mind. But we can deter-mine the nature of thoughts onwhich we choose to dwell—tocultivate a direction of thoughtthat is positive and life-enhanc-ing, rather than destructive andlife-draining.

There are two courses thatwe can navigate through thestorm that rages in our ownimagination. The one that willbring us into harbor requiresthat we leave negative thoughtsin our wake, choose to thinkpositively, and act within therealm of self-affirming patternsof thought. Clearly, it is easier tomake such a choice in a positivecontext.

A newly hired scientist,whose first project for her cor-porate employer resulted in amillion-dollar loss, was request-ed to report to the CEO. Thescientist arrived at the executive’soffice shaking in her shoes. Thecompany president asked her ifthe facts were straight, and theproject had indeed lost all thatmoney. The scientist stammeredout a “yes.” Rising from hischair, the president thrust outhis hand and exclaimed, “Con-gratulations!” leaving the youngwoman relieved, yet utterlybewildered.

The president continued,“This company has been suc-

cessful in large part because of our willingness toexperiment, take risks, and learn from our failures.If you were to lose another million dollars for thesame reason, you’d have to find work elsewhere. Weassume you’ve learned something important fromthis attempt, and that something great will come ofit.” That scientist eventually became a valuable con-


Truth is thebasic currencyof humansocial relations.It is whatstabilizessociety, andwhat allows forits existence.Consider this:if lying werethe standardbehavior in asociety, allknowledgewould have tobe self-acquired. Noone could trustwhat waslearned fromanother.

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tributor to the research organization, producinginnovation after innovation.

This example shows how a company can chooseto use failures to generate possibilities, rather thanas a vehicle for diminishing emerging potential.Corporations which work to discern opportunities,rather than obstacles, have chosen the higher pathof positive thought, which leads not only to unex-pected profit, but also to new discovery and sub-stantial growth. Such corporate policy begins at thelevel of individual leadership, at the time and placewhere the leader makes a choice—not to be a victimof imagined circumstance, but to take responsibili-ty for a well-considered choice and to transformchallenging situations to reflect a positive outcome.These are clear and simple acts of will that harnessthe mind to serve and discover greatness.

ACTING ETHICALLY

The business environment is charged with a hostof new issues, involving occupational health, envi-ronmental consciousness, affirmative action, inter-national conflicts of interest, and sexual integrity inthe workplace, just to name a few. Traditional busi-ness ethics are inadequate to answer these moralquestions. Furthermore, providing people with ajob is no longer adequate justification for a “bot-tom-line” corporate mentality in which profitscome before people in every instance. More sophis-ticated ethical tools are needed for today’s businessclimate.

ACCOUNTABILITY

Today, for better or worse, business is account-able at both a societal and personal level. Businessdecisions affect not only the standard and quality ofliving for employees, but can help to extend to allpeople the chance for adequate nutrition, goodhealth, and quality medical care, as well as a life withdignity. These are basic human rights that businessleaders can help to ensure, because they, more thanany other group, can create solutions to problemswithin the framework of day-to-day realities.

Peter Drucker, one of the architects of modernmanagement, has said that “efficiency is doing thething right, while effectiveness is doing the rightthing.” When business leaders ask themselves thequestion, “What is the right way?” they frequentlymean what is politically expedient or good for prof-

its in the short run. Business today has the financial network and

technological capabilities to shape the destiny ofhumanity. Such a responsibility requires leaders whowill address needs effectively and a business ethicbased on the spiritual value of human dignity. Cor-porate culture must seek not only the optimum rela-tionship among risk, reward, and profit, it must fos-ter initiative, sharing, and community.

Doing what is right profits all our lives and plowsa wider strip of ground than the narrow focus of thetraditional corporate bottom-line. I believe thatbusinesses that choose to act ethically are ultimate-ly more profitable than those obsessed with the net.Doing good for its own sake requires a shift in themanagerial paradigm. The decision-making author-ity invested in management results in an ethical con-flict between the manager and employee when theemployee is not consulted about important compa-ny decisions. Management must explore new waysof sharing that authority in order to establish a morecomprehensive ethic for in-company culture.

The policy of Missouri’s Springfield Remanufac-turing Company—with a work force of 800 and1995 earnings of over $100 million—is to treatemployees “as if they own the place.” Hence, pro-duction workers receive exactly the same informa-tion in their weekly meetings about every pennyearned and spent as the board of directors, and par-ticipate in making corporate decisions right alongwith management. Springfield’s open-book man-agement has been called a turnaround strategy forAmerican capitalism, and such large corporations asXerox and Clorox send teams of executives to “TheGreat Game of Business” seminars to learn fromthe Springfield model.

The effect of corporate decisions is not isolatedwithin the organization, but touches human societyas a whole. Every individual who thinks and actsethically contributes to a universal moral climate.Our every action makes a difference, just as everythought registers within the energy pool of the cos-mos. Ethical thinking contributes toward a positiveenvironment of imagination and hope.

TELLING THE TRUTH

“Character,” Aristotle wrote, “is a matter ofhabit.” We develop a truthful character simply by


45

Suffering Can Be UsefulP O L L Y Y O U N G - E I S E N D R A T H

There is a dearth of methods and theories about how suffering can be useful in the contemporary

world. Coming from the elite ranks of medicine, biology, and sometimes even psychology is an

almost uniform lack of interest in the value of suffering. Instead, the focus is on avoiding or elim-

inating it. This strategy tends to increase our worst fears—that pain and suffering are intolerable

and useless. I’ve told a different story here, an alternative way of looking at our hardships as major

catalysts for change and development.IMA

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Polly Young-Eisendrath, Ph.D., is a psychologist, Jun-gian psychoanalyst, and Clinical Associate Professor inPsychiatry at University of Vermont College of Medi-cine. She writes and lectures widely about human devel-opment, and does research on resilience.

I’m writing against the current tide thatincludes a widespread assortment of recov-ery and New Age formulas for how to stayhealthy, happy, and in control, as well as thehard-core scientific ideologies of geneticengineering that promise us cures for allmajor diseases and the possibility of con-

quering death. Trying to find a gene for criminali-ty, a physical cause for hopelessness, and ever betterdrugs to treat our negative moods, we direct ourgaze toward nature to locate the origin or cause ofour suffering. This is a grave error.

Much of our suffering originates with our owndiscontent. When we discover that, we begin to finda path to freedom. Our society is moving in a psy-chologically and spiritually dangerous direction, as

we attempt to explain more and more of our per-sonal difficulties through biology and genes. We’vedropped the mirror of self-recognition.

Without the capacity to see how we create a lotof our own difficulties, we are morally and spiritu-ally adrift. We are often deeply perplexed about theincrease in violence and destruction in our cities andthe willingness of our young people to take theirown and others’ lives. But it is obvious that there isno—widespread understanding of the ethic of suf-fering that one is the creator of oneself and thatwhatever we do, we become heir to our actions.There is no felt personal connection betweenactions and consequences, no belief that death is atransition, no hunger for compassion or service as ameans to self-knowledge.

A famous story about the Buddha tells of hisencounter with a teen-age mother who has lost herinfant to death. She is frantic with grief and outrageand has traveled from village to village, carrying herchild on her hip, looking for a miracle that couldbring the child back to life. Someone tells her thatonly the Buddha, who is preaching in a nearbytown, would be capable of such a miracle. Whenshe arrives at the town and finds the crowds aroundthe Buddha, she pushes her way through and standsbefore him.

“If you would perform a miracle and bring mychild back to life, I would do anything in return,”she says with touching sincerity. The Buddha seesthe depth of her grief and says, “If you bring me amustard seed from a home in which there has beenno death, then I will perform the miracle.” Thissounds like a small task, and she readily agrees, set-ting off with the deepest gratitude in her heart.

She travels from door to door in this and othervillages, carrying her dead child and asking at eachhouse if there has ever been a death. She hears aboutmany difficult deaths and much disease, and herheart is opened to other people’s pain. Eventually,she realizes that all families have been touched bydeath, and she returns to the Buddha.

“I know now what you were trying to teach me,”she says. “I am not alone in my misery. All peoplemust endure death, not only their own, but others’around them.” The Buddha gently offers to per-form a funeral for her child, and then to teach her


how suffering can be alleviated.Thus, she becomes one of hismost dedicated followers, andeventually a powerful teacher inher own right.

The only real freedom fromsuffering and death is to acceptthem, to be interested and beginto see how they connect us toourselves through meaning, andto others through compassion.Although we may find manycures for illnesses and somerelief for pain, only when we cantransform our own fears andanxiety into interest and curios-ity do we have access to theknowledge and compassion thatgive life purpose. This sense ofpurpose brings greater creativityand transcendent coherence,allowing us to move moresmoothly through future diffi-culties and losses, appreciatingthe riches they provide, in thecontext of the demands theymake on us.

Yet, today, we have littleinterest in how to make sense ofsuffering, maintaining instead a sometimes singularfocus on how to quell the pain that can teach us somuch. There is a tendency now to assume thatdepression is a “biological disease” because we haveantidepressant medication that sometimes workswell to relieve symptoms. There may well be a bio-logical component to some depressions that mighteven have psychological origins, but we have in noway empirically demonstrated that depression is abiological disease. Biochemists don’t even know whyantidepressant drugs work to alleviate some depres-sions. And yet, we make claims that we know whatdepression is and that we have defeated it.

Depression is still a transitory mood, one that weall have from time to time, and we don’t know muchmore about its origins than we did a hundred yearsago. We know something about some kinds ofdepression, but we don’t know the big picture. The

hype surrounding the new anti-depressants focuses our gaze onbiology, not on our own negativ-ity or discontent.

In his successful book, Listen-ing to Prozac, the psychiatristPeter Kramer not only advocatesProzac—or similar SSRI antide-pressants that increase serotoninlevels—for most cases of depres-sion, but he claims that it canmake people “better than well.”Why would anyone want to bebetter than well? It’s one thingto improve a debilitating depres-sion so that a person can awakenbasic self-awareness, but it’sanother to try to escape the ordi-nary problems of living. Readersof Kramer’s book can easilycome away with the impressionthat Prozac will solve life’s prob-lems, everything from a badmood to low self-confidence.Even though antidepressants canhelp us stabilize a difficult mooddisorder, if we look to the med-ication to solve life’s problems,then we’ve broken the connec-

tion between suffering and meaning.In my experience doing therapy with depressed

and anxious adults, I have seen them becomeresilient within the cycles of depression and renew-al by seeing how their own psychological complex-es—the negativity and discontent—triggered theirdepressed moods. Looking into the mirror of self-recognition, we can all reduce the despair, resent-ment, envy, and self-pity that increasingly charac-terize many of us living in the affluent societies oftoday’s world.

We need far more opportunities to hear stories ofsuffering, to explore our own experiences in somemeaningful context, to be mentored or guidedthrough the fundamental transitions from sufferingto compassion, and to become knowledgeable aboutthe ethic of suffering.

In large measure, we in Western societies have a


The only realfreedom fromsuffering anddeath is toaccept them, tobe interestedand begin tosee how theyconnect us toourselvesthroughmeaning, andto othersthroughcompassion.

social problem with “idealization”—a grandiose fan-tasy about who we are and what we should con-trol—that can separate us from other peoples andother species, and may have already put us at highrisk for extinction. This kind of idealization, a ten-dency to feel exempt from the natural conditions orlimitations of human life, stems from illusions ofcontrol and independence. Many aspects of West-ern culture, from our stories of individual heroesand geniuses (stories that always eliminate the influ-ences of family members and others who might havecontributed to “greatness”) to our beliefs in theTrue Self, promote isolation and overestimation ofour personal worth—perhaps even the worth of ourspecies.

The human ability to think abstractly, to manip-ulate symbolic concepts apart from concrete situa-tions, is perhaps one of the greatest resources of ourspecies. When it goes unchecked—driven primari-ly and unknowingly by dukkha—it can also lead toruin, as the desire for greater and greater compe-tence overtakes our experience of interconnection.

Our economic systems are grounded in compe-tition and individualism, and although we have thepotential for the complex responsiveness of truedemocracy (valuing a range of different points ofview and responding to a range of needs), we seemmore and more to be moving into a zero sum gamethat focuses on personal stakes (like my pocketbookor my safety versus yours) and pulls in the directionof self-protection and isolation. Rather than work-ing together to achieve goals that are shaped firstand foremost by the interdependence of our needsand those of other life systems, we often end up pro-tecting the most privileged humans. In large part,this is the product of believing in individual rights tohappiness, no matter the expense to other peopleand other beings.

Unless we can begin to see that our inherent dis-content and drive for increasing competence run upagainst our interdependence or connectedness, wehumans may not survive the next millennium. Ourdrive for competence may be the great instinctiveweakness that topples our species. We can see hownegative thinking might have benefited us in theevolutionary process, compelling us to greater andgreater manipulation of the environment for our

own needs. But from the perspective of the delicatebalance of the ecosystem of life, our ever more com-petent adaptation may be ill-suited for the long run.

Our capacity for competence sets us up to feelexempt from the constraints and limitations of lifeon this planet. But in recognizing our suffering, see-ing how we create it, we can free ourselves from theconstant press to improve, and begin to experiencethe vast interconnectedness of our existence.

As we develop personal responsibility for ourattitudes, intentions, and actions, we begin to freeourselves from the dictates of self-protectiveness.We ride the mule backwards and see ourselves inthe mirror of hellish existence. We gain the capaci-ty to transform hell into heaven.

What is so striking about the resilient is howsmoothly and quickly they create a coherent andmeaningful story from hardship, misery, trauma,abuse. They shape painful, desperate events intounity and purpose, into compassion and creativity.This might seem like some sleight-of-mind trick ifwe had no conception of how we create worlds fromour own attitudes and responses. From psycho-analysis and Buddhism alike, we glean ideas aboutwhy our meaning, our attributions, and intentionsare so vitally important in shaping a life.

When you change your perception of an event ora person, at that moment the perceived alsochanges. Subject and object are joined by percep-tion. This account of a world resting on conscious-ness seems far-flung only if we hold onto the notionof a separate self. When we conceive of the self aswholly interdependent, functioning to integrate andbring coherent image and meaning to diverse per-ception, then we appreciate more deeply the free-dom that human beings have brought to the world.This freedom is one of making new meanings, espe-cially of opening ourselves in times of pain and suf-fering to the roots of our compassion. When wecross the bridge from self-protectiveness to com-passion and knowledge, we have changed the world.Without the ordinary occasion of human suffer-ing—our own discontent—it is likely that we wouldnever find the bridge.•

From “The Gifts of Suffering” by Polly Young-Eisendrath.Copyright 1996 by Polly Young-Eisendrath. Printed withpermission from Addison-Wesley Publishing Company Inc.


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Inner andOuter Peace

R A J I N D E R S I N G H

Throughout the world, we find people have many ways of expressing their desire for peace. We

hear phrases such as “peace be with you.” At Christmas, people send greeting cards or sing songs

about “peace on earth.” We find that people will hold up two fingers in the form of a “V” which

symbolizes “peace.” When someone dies, we pray that he or she “rests in peace.” Nations meet con-

tinually to search for ways to make peace with each other. Organizations dedicated to peace have

sprung up in many countries. There is even a Nobel peace prize for individual contributions to this

noble cause.IMA

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Sant Rajinder Singh is an expert teacher of meditationand the head of Science of Spirituality, a non-denomina-tional organization that provides a forum for people tolearn meditation and to experience personal transforma-tion. He is the author of several books, including “Visionsof Spiritual Unity” and “Peace, Ecology of the Soul.”

The quest for peace is universal.In every age and in every coun-try, people have been trying tofind peace within their environ-ment, within their societies, andwithin the world. It is strangethat this search has been going

on for so long and has been sought by so manypeople, yet its attainment remains elusive. Few findpeace for themselves. Nothing on earth seems toprovide us with a true and lasting peace. We startto wonder why peace is so hard to achieve.

WHY PEACE IS SO ELUSIVE

First, we should analyze what peace is. A dic-tionary defines it as freedom from strife, and a stateof serenity and calmness. Inherent in this definitionis the answer to why peace is so difficult to find.Life and strife seem to go hand in hand. Whetherone is rich or poor, a king or a peasant, one’s life isalways beset with one problem or another.

There is a story from the life of Lord Buddhawhich aptly illustrates this truth. A woman whoseyoung son had died approached Lord Buddha. Shewas shedding copious tears over the loss of herchild. She asked Buddha to help bring her son backto life and ease the terrible pain in her heart. Bud-dha, in his wisdom, told her he would help her ifshe could first bring back the mustard seed from ahousehold in which no one ever died. The lady fol-lowed his instructions and moved from one hometo the next. Yet, at each door, she received the samereply. She realized that there wasn’t any family thatcould pass through life escaping the loss of one ofits members.

Death is the one inevitable fact of life. Sicknessand disease are yet others. We need only examineour own life to see how difficult it is to go throughone’s existence without any mishap, accident, orillness. Medical books are filled with numerous dis-eases that can afflict human beings. There is nodearth of accidents that could befall us, as we movethrough life’s highways and byways. With death orillness hanging over our heads, it is difficult to livein perpetual, uninterrupted peace.

Even if our physical body is fairly healthy, fewcan pass through life without any strife. There aremany occurrences that produce stress. If we have afamily, we know that the illness, unhappiness, ormisfortune of any member causes the others to bedistressed. Whenever any two people live or worktogether, there are bound to be tensions due to dif-ferences of opinions or differing viewpoints. Thereare a host of other problems that afflict our lives. Ifwe search for peace in our outer life, at best we canfind transitory moments. We certainly do havetimes in which we enjoy the warmth of being withour loved ones, or we have moments of happiness

from some gain or achievement. But thesemoments are fleeting. Inevitably, life again comeswith its panorama of problems. The great mystic-poet saint, Sant Darshan Singh, expressed thisbeautifully in one of his verses:

Whenever your devotee’s condition alters but alittle, Life presents itself to me with another cupof sorrow.

It seems as if lasting peace in this life is virtual-ly impossible. Life is more like a pendulum inwhich we swing back and forth from moments ofjoy to moments of sorrow.

ATTAINING INNER PEACE

But true peace can be attained in this lifetime.We only need to undergo a paradigm shift. Ourangle of vision needs to be changed. We normallylook for peace in the outer world. We hope to findit in our possessions, positions, and relationships.But the loss of any of these causes us to becomeagitated and distraught. Our peace of mind is dis-turbed. There is a way to have true peace. Just asBirbal shortened Akbar’s line by drawing a longerline next to it, the solution to finding peace can befound in a similar way. We cannot change thenature of the world and its problems. But we canadd a new dimension to life that will give us peace.

Peace can be found within us. Many peoplebelieve the outer world is the only reality. But theenlightened luminaries throughout history havehad mystical experiences which verified for themthe existence of inner spiritual regions.

Buddha found enlightenment by inverting with-in himself. Christ has said, “The kingdom of heav-en is within you.” The Muslim and the Judeo-Christian scriptures speak of the contact that theprophets had with God. Mystics in every religionhave described their inner spiritual experiences.These higher realms co-exist simultaneously withus in the physical world. They are realms of eter-nal peace and bliss. We cannot change the world,but we can tune into those realms lying within us.By doing so, we will change our perspective in ourlife.

The way to reach this inner world is through

meditation. Meditation is the process by which weseparate our soul from the body to voyage into theregions within. Spiritual teachers or mystics whohave mastered this science can teach it to us. First,they explain the theory so we can understand theprocess. Then, they give us a practical demonstra-tion of it through meditation on the inner Lightand Sound.

The more we come in contact with the Lightand Sound, the more bliss we experience. The soulexperiences pure joy and happiness. This bliss stayswith the soul throughout the day and night, and weexperience peace and contentment.

CONTRIBUTING TO OUTER PEACE

By mastering meditation under the guidance ofa spiritual teacher, we not only attain personal ful-fillment, but we become an instrument for bring-ing peace and joy to those around us. When wemerge in the Creator, we recognize that all livingthings are children of God. We realize that theLight of God that is within us is within everyoneelse. We realize that all beings are brothers and sis-ters in the Creator. It is at this stage that we devel-op true love for all, for our fellow beings, and forall creation. We become ambassadors of God’slove. We radiate love to others. If each person hadthis realization, there would be true peace on thisplanet.

By experiencing inner peace, we can achieveouter peace. By entering into the sanctuary ofpeace within us, we gain the inner treasures. Somepeople may feel that the path of meditation is oneof escapism. They feel that it requires one to sit inan outer cave or on a mountain top like a recluse.But meditation does not lead to escapism; rather, itmakes us more alive. It is one of the most effectiveways to actively work towards outer peace. Weshould maintain a balanced life in the world. Whileattending to our spiritual progress, we should alsolead a normal life, fulfilling our worldly responsi-bilities. We need to work in the world to earn aliving. We must care for our family. We shouldcontribute to the needs of our neighbors, our com-munity, our society, the nation, and the world.Whatever we undertake, we should do to the best



52

The Seat of ProsperityR I C K J A R O W

The heart is the seat of prosperity. If one’s prosperity is achieved without an open heart, one will

still feel poor. No matter how much is accumulated on any level, something will be missing. The

notion of the heart as the center of prosperity exposes the myth of “hard work” for what it is, as there

are quite a few beings on this planet who are able to manifest materially without working. Mil-

lions of people have witnessed the Indian holy man, Sai Baba, manifest materials from the universal

field into his hand. Swami Jnanananda Giri, upon finding a sack of potatoes dumped in front of

his cottage, would say something like, “Somebody must be coming for dinner,” and indeed people

would arrive later that evening.

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Rick Jarow, Ph.D., visiting professor of History of Reli-gion at Vassar College and former Mellon Fellow in theHumanities at Columbia University, is a practicingalternative career counselor. The author of “In Search ofthe Sacred,” as well as numerous articles and audiotapes,he presents seminars on career and soul in the UnitedStates, Canada, Italy, Germany, and Eastern Europe.

This does not equate with any formof f r ee load ing . R ichardDominguez, the one-time stock-broker who preaches financialindependence through radicalvoluntary simplicity, notes thatpeople who succeed in being sup-

ported without working for money are usually peo-ple who have an intense sense of mission. They areinner-directed, and their directness supports thosearound them. What needs to be fully appreciatedfor prosperity to manifest is the way of the heart inthe world, the way of giving and receiving. Thisbasic movement of the heart is mirrored by the inbreath and out breath; the inhale receives from life,and the exhale offers itself back to life. In truth, noone can say where one movement ends and theother begins, for the words giving and receiving arebut human approximations of a much greater uni-versal law. Nevertheless, when we speak we arebound to these terms. Receiving is mentioned firstbecause it is conspicuously absent from our lives.Notice how most people react to compliments, forexample. It is not unusual for any of us to shy awayfrom them, saying—often with our body lan-guage—that we are unworthy of receiving suchrecognition. On the other hand, we might be sostarved for support that we are continually seekingnew ways to market ourselves, thrusting ourselveson people whether they would benefit from our giftsor not.

Both sides of this polarity indicate an inability toreceive. Receiving has to do with having a funda-mental openness toward experience, a willingnessto accept all that life has to offer—the good and the

so-called bad. Often we do not allow ourselves toreceive because we have not developed a strong,centered ground. We simply cannot hold the ener-gy of bounty. We are bowled over by heightenedspiritual experiences or by perceptions of too muchmoney, authority, responsibility, and so forth. Inorder to receive, we must begin at the root, estab-lishing ourselves in our fullness and in our right andneed to be exactly who and where we are. We alignour feelings with this energy and can then choosereasonable priorities to focus on. But if we are notable to receive, our priority will not make contactwith the greater community.

Receiving can operate on many levels. We canlearn to receive praise or constructive criticism; wecan allow ourselves to accept money, beauty, andaffection, as well as quality friendships and qualityitems, not feeling unworthy or awkward at partici-pating in all of life’s treasures. Receiving alsoinvolves accepting rejection and pain without block-ing it out and forming judgments that will not allowus to transform the energy. When it is our time todrink from the cup of poison, we can drink it com-pletely. In this way we receive the impact, and hencethe wisdom, of the experience. In the midst of ourdarkness, we then find a jewel forming, a treasurethat is ours to share because we have allowed it toform through our genuine openness. If we areunwilling to open to rejection, criticism, or illness,we waste much energy trying to push these thingsaway and are therefore constantly in a defensiveposition. In order to receive such gifts, we must beconvinced of our innate goodness and value. Wemust believe that we are inherently worthy. Finally,in order to receive we must give, for giving opens upour field and sets up the flowing circuit of prosper-ity. But in order to give, we must believe that wehave something to give. No matter what kind of tal-ents and abilities or seeming handicaps and short-comings we might think we have, what we have tooffer is essentially our own God-given essence, andno person or thing can minimize this or take it away.

The first thing we can do to retrain ourselves toreceive is to practice receiving the fullness of ourbreaths. By beginning each morning as a consciousreceiver of the breath of life, you will feel so ener-gized that you will want to give, you will want to get


up and do something. Image yourself as an openvessel. Invite the breath of life to flow through allthe organs of your body. One by one allow thelungs, heart, liver, stomach, spleen, pancreas, kid-neys, bladder, and sex organs to become energizedand filled. Every morning invite your limbs, mus-cles, bones, tendons, and skin to be filled with vitalenergy. Receive! The next time someone compli-ments you, do not cringe or belittle yourself, butinstead allow yourself fully to take in the compli-ment. Take the time to feel yourself filled con-sciously. Giving will then become a natural outcomeof your condition.

Giving is not about doing good, nor is it aboutservice to God, guru, or country. Such concepts canfurther the illusion of separation and are often basedon some subtle form of self-hate. Most of us havelived our lives filled to the brim with injurious plat-itudes about how we should give and help the needy.Consequently, many people harbor “healer’s dis-ease” and so sit in watchful wait for someone inneed, swooping down upon them in order to justi-fy the healer’s existence. Thoreau once said, “If Iknew for a certainty that a man was coming to myhouse with the conscious design of doing me good,I should run for my life.” And so would we, becausewe are being attacked by the grasping need behindthe act. Much so-called giving is based on a sense ofobligation and therefore prohibits the natural flowof receiving. The same is true of tithing, and anysimilar type of saving, if it is calculated to bring aprofit later on. All such methods have in commonthe desire to create a specific end, which means thatthey are coming from one form of attitudinal pover-ty or another. There is no spontaneity, no magic,and no meeting. This is why so many wealthy peo-ple need to continue accumulating money; they donot know how to do anything else. Even with allmanner of comforts, they are still not receiving, andthus they remain haunted by what they do not have.

In the Tibetan Buddhist tradition, this mentali-ty is known to belong to the realm of the “hungryghost.” Hungry ghosts are visualized as disembod-ied spirits with enormous bodies and tiny mouthswho are always trying to suck up more experiencebecause they can never get enough. The VietnameseBuddhist teacher Thich Nhat Hanh observes that

America seems to have a hungry ghost syndrome.The feverish energy of consumption—intellectualand emotional, as well as material—is never satisfiedbecause there is little earth-centered groundednessor a regenerative cycle of giving and receiving.

Giving, whether it is of an emotional or a mate-rial nature, is not a calculated act. Giving flows fromfullness, and it is spontaneous. When we feel full, weare free to give and to receive. Every time you findyourself hoarding, ask yourself what you are actual-ly trying to fill. (This includes the hoarding ofknowledge.) Each time you find yourself giving outof compulsion, look to the root of the compulsion,for true giving is an expression of our value, andevery time we give, in every way we give, we aremaking a statement. With every dollar we spend,we are supporting something or someone. Do ourexpenditures reflect our values? Do we see spendingas giving, or are we still trying to extract bread fromthe world? If we only spent money on what webelieved in, every expenditure would be aligning uswith our priorities and moving us toward our goals.Every time we paid a bill, we would be actively sup-porting a new vision of the world. For example,many people now buy organic food whenever pos-sible, not only for health reasons, but also because itsupports the natural foods industry, the small farm-ers, and self-sustaining agriculture, rather thancommunity-crippling agribusiness. These peopleare not simply buying food, they are giving. In asimilar vein, new companies such as Working Assetsand Seventh Generation have built the idea of giv-ing into their corporate mission. Every time youpay your telephone bill under Working Assets, forexample, a percentage of that money is put towardenvironmental causes.

Another word for giving is support, and supportis something that occurs on all levels. Joyce Criten-don remarks that if the customers at her inn feel theheart energy coming from the staff—that is, if theyfeel true support—then even when there are defectsin the service, the guests are likely to return. Forthey are receiving something that cannot be mea-sured, and yet it is palpable.

The opposite of support is envy—the same envythat Emerson declared to be ignorance—and it isthe crowning emblem of our scarcity. Wherever


there is envy in our lives, thereis a place where we believe thatwe do not have enough, orworse, are not ourselvesenough. To work through theheart center is to come to termswith our envy.

Envy is the serpent’s tongue.It bites us and holds on, poison-ing every part it touches. Formany, the whole career game isbased on envy, and all the tradi-tional metaphors for gettingahead are tied in with it. Artistsand career spiritualists are notimmune. How often do we hearthe tinge of envy in our critiqueof another’s work or another’steaching? As long as envy holdssway in our hearts, we cannotfunction in a free capacity, forenvy is based on a sense ofpoverty and non-acceptance ofourselves. This does not meanthat we arm ourselves withgoodness and go out to van-quish the enemy of negativeemotion. That only leaves uswith a humble and frustratedego. Like any other so-callednegative emotion, envy begs forcare and investigation. And aswe trace it down to its roots, wesee our hidden hopes as delicate flowers that havebeen stepped on and damaged. We find things thatwe always wanted to do but never did, and ways inwhich we always wanted to be but never allowedourselves to be. Once we see what underlies ourenvy, we can stop projecting the emotion outwardonto others. There is new material to guide us andhelp us open to the desires of the heart.

If you believe the nature of the world to be dog-eat-dog competition, it will be that for you, andevery encounter will reinforce this dreadful pattern.The way of the heart is the win/win alternative, andit entails coming to terms with envy, mistrust, andour basic contraction from the life process, not as

saints but as courageous investi-gators of our personal reality.When you mistrust or contractin face of a situation, you canexplore it. What is the emotion-al quality of the situation? Canyou fully articulate it? Mistrustand envy are not the enemies,but are instead powerful keys toexploring our scarcity-riddenmentalities, of deeply lookinginto the parts of ourselves thatare not fulfilled, and thus givingus opportunities to reclaim them.

Many people recommendexercises in self-forgiveness forovercoming contraction, but oneneeds to be very careful in theirapplication. Anger, envy, and soforth are genuine feelings achingto be explored. If forgivenessbecomes a “should,” then we willconstantly torture ourselves try-ing to be better people. Perhaps abetter word for working withheart-based emotions is accep-tance, living inside a heartfeltacceptance that allows us to opento a situation as it is. The open-ness is achieved not by denying,but by admitting whatever emo-tion is present and exploring itfrom the heart center, that is,

exploring it without motive, vengeance, or judg-ment. The places where we cringe are our personaledges. They are the doors we have never been quiteable to walk through, although we have alwaysknown they are there waiting for us. The edge isthe place where we get tied up in knots in the pres-ence of another person, where we panic at theprospect of turning on the light, even when thedarkness feels overwhelming. In order to establishlife work that will support our fullness, we need tochallenge this place, to walk through this door andother doors like it, even if we start by just stickingour big toes in the water.

One edge that appears time and again in career


Our callingmay often berevealedthrough oursymptoms,illnesses, anddiscomforts.The very energythat may becrippling us mayeventually leadus to ourvocations. Tolisten to thiscalling, inwhatever form,is the stuff ofcourage.

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counseling is, “How am I going to get paid for it?”Many people in the public service and helping pro-fessions feel guilty about receiving payment.Uncomfortable with taking money from an individ-ual, they instead milk the insurance companies forall they can. This scenario points to a misunder-standing of giving and receiving. When we are will-ing to receive from another (notice I did not use theword take), others will want to give to us becausetheir true need is to give, rather than to “be taken.”When you ask a doctor what his fee is these days, hemore often than not feigns ignorance and passes youon to his receptionist. The receptionist can quoteyou the doctor’s exorbitant fee without wincing,since she knows that the insurance company willpay for it. Bureaucracies, such as the insuranceindustry, remove all sense of giving and receiving.We have given away this power because most of usare ashamed of the way we give and receive.

In order to get right with money, we must getright with ourselves; we must establish our sense ofself-worth and enter fully into the wheel of givingand receiving. We need not be afraid to receivebecause we have given, and we are certainly moreinspired to give when we feel we are not beingtaken. A Himalayan-dwelling holy man, SwamiJnanananda Giri, used to tell me that money isround to keep it rolling. To “keep it rolling” meansto enter into the practice of giving and receiving.When we start doing this consciously, we actuallybegin getting paid for our work because we value it,and others receive that which is of value. Our workitself becomes our way of giving back to life. It is anexpression of our fullness, rather than a need toextract bread from the earth. This is the dance thatwe negotiate as we work through the heart center.

One woman’s life dream was to go to Israel andbecome an active peacemaker. She had very strongorganizational and interpersonal communicationskills, but no other plan of action. Yet her ideal wasmore than a fly-by-night fantasy. She had beenholding it in her heart for many years, and it hadbeen incubating. Her children were now in college,and she felt more ready than ever to set out and seewhat life would bring. Just as she began to conceiveof this as a concrete possibility and actually plan atrip to test the waters, the company she worked for

offered her a hefty raise. Her brain went into imme-diate action. She began thinking, “I could work forfive more years, save enough money to secure myfuture, and then I’ll pursue my dream.”

This is the position most of us find ourselves in.Our heads and hearts are entangled, and we are for-ever trying to come up with some mutually satisfy-ing compromise. There is no formula here, no wayto say if, when, or how one should forego the secu-rity of salary, an established position, or credentials.

Following one’s heart does not necessarily meanleaving the established world behind. Some do so ina flourish of heroism and are even lauded by theworld. But a teacher of mine who worked withAlbert Schweitzer in the jungles of Africa told methat the good doctor’s organ music often sounded abit out of place there. Many who leave the estab-lished world in a flourish return with a dejectedthud. It is not emotion, then, that will carry us. Theheart’s energy should not be confused with emo-tion. What carries us is the incubation, the simmer-ing, the constant reappearance of the dream, theinner call that strengthens with time and demandsto be heard.

The distinguished Islamic theologian al-Ghaza-li (1058-1111), a teacher at the University of Bagh-dad, was held in the highest respect by his peers,though he secretly felt that his work was not fulfill-ing some greater part of himself. Something elsewas calling him. He would listen, consider makinga change, and then lose courage, until one day histhroat dried up, and he could no longer speak. Thedoctors told al-Ghazali that there was nothing phys-ically wrong with him, but that he was suffering amalady of the soul! Al-Ghazali left Baghdad andstudied in seclusion with Sufi mystics for manyyears. He ultimately returned to teaching with adeepened sense of his calling, and did much to healthe rift between mystical and juridical Islam.

Our calling may often be revealed through oursymptoms, illnesses, and discomforts. The heartneed not judge. The very energy that may be crip-pling us may eventually lead us to our vocations. Tolisten to this calling, in whatever form, is the stuff ofcourage. It will lead to appropriate action, and youwill know that it is appropriate because your beingwill feel clear, enlivened, and at peace.


57

Radical Self-AcceptanceJ A M E S M . M C M A H O N

Life is about this—just how much we love ourselves. If we love and enjoy ourselves, we are free

and are living life to its fullest. If we don’t love ourselves, we are being deprived of the most impor-

tant thing in the history of the universe—our life. Being out of touch with just how wonderful we

are is double-trouble. It keeps us from truth, and it keeps us from joy. Yet, there is an agency in us

that works full-time to do just that. We don’t need to join that demon! We may not be able to stop

its operation just yet, but we can make a decision this very moment to have mercy on ourselves. We

can make the decision to know that this self-criticism is delusion, not our fault, and we can form

the intention this very moment to begin to let it go.IMA

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James M. McMahon, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist inpractice for twenty-five years. He has been AssociateClinical Professor at Derner Institute of Advanced Psy-chological Studies, chief psychologist for the Mt. VernonPublic Schools, and a consultant for the Peace Corps andthe Franciscan and Marist Brothers. He resides in NewYork City.

One of the reasons that radicalself-acceptance is so crucial isthat no change can occur withoutit! We begin to grow out intoourselves to the extent that webegin to love ourselves better.Change never occurs when we

lack respect for ourselves. In human growth orreturn to spirit, radical self-acceptance is the pri-mary agent. In fact, radical self-acceptance is theprimary autonomous act, the most profound psy-chological separation step of all. It implies two irre-ducible psychic events, “I am enough in myself,”and “I take the power of evaluation of myself tomyself.”

No change can occur without acceptance, at leastthe way I use the word acceptance. Psychological andspiritual literature is filled with references to accep-tance, self-regard, good self-concept, healthy nar-cissism, healthy self-love. I use the term radicalwhen I refer to self-acceptance because I mean anattitude that surpasses or transcends the ordinaryuses of the term. It is beyond evaluation.

First, acceptance means “to receive willingly,” toaccept completely any particular characteristic orbehavior. It is a receiving of ourselves, a witnessing,completely without judgment. We may be curiousor charmed or shocked, but never critical. We letour opinion of ourselves alone. We may modify ourbehavior because of the demands of reality. But ourbasic nature, we accept as a given. We are neutral.Second, we love ourselves as a decision, much as wemight love another. Loving is really more a functionof our capacity to love than of the attractiveness ofthe beloved. This is true of ourselves as well. Welove ourselves because we choose to. Loving our-selves radically and unconditionally has nothing todo with our worth—as if there were such a thing asworth. We are worthy as a rose is worthy because itis life, and as such it is beautiful. Radical self-accep-tance is the total love of self that transcends evenunconditional positive regard or a “wonderful” eval-uation of ourselves. It is totally without evaluation.It accepts what is, and knows that it is good. It is anaspect of worship; it is a hurrah, a salute to life. Inloving ourselves with no strings attached, fully andwithout reservations, we need not be anything inparticular except capable of full, complete, unen-cumbered love. And as we love, we deepen our rela-tionship with ourselves. When we beat ourselves up,we are in relationship to a negative parental image,not to ourselves. We are fused. To radically love our-selves, then, is to separate, to be free. This is why itscares us so.

Radical self-acceptance and change may seem tobe mutually exclusive. If I accept myself complete-ly and without reservation, why would I want tochange anything? This may be true about the fierceadmonitions to change that we generally direct atourselves. Radical self-acceptance and fierceness donot coexist. But there is a gentle urge to change thatdoes not come from a sense of something being

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Meditation begins with relax-ation. Most of the time we aretense without realizing it.Even when we go to sleep,our body and mind are notrelaxed: We carry the ten-sions of the day with us and

so do not have restful sleep. We wake up the nextmorning with a feeling of languor or fatigue. Wedo not feel fresh and strong to meet the challengesof the new day. This goes on day after day, and thetension keeps on accumulating, until it manifestsitself in one physical illness or another.

So many diseases of the present day—heartattack, high blood pressure, nervous breakdown,migraine headache, asthma—are due to the buildupof tension. It has been rightly said that “people donot die of disease: they die of internal combustion.”The demand for tranquilizers increases day by day.What is needed is to relax—if possible, twice everyday.

There are many methods of relaxation; each per-son must follow the one that best suits him or her.Here is a simple, easy eleven-step method:

1. Lie on your back on the floor (or a carpet). Orsit on the floor in a comfortable posture. Or in achair with your feet gently touching the floor. Takea few deep breaths, exhaling each slowly, complete-ly emptying the lungs.

2. Imagine yourself in the loving, immediate, andpersonal presence of the Lord (your Beloved). Youare sitting at His Lotus feet with your arms girdlingHis ankles, your head resting on His feet. Say toyourself: “Here is true rest. Here is true relaxation.In Thy presence, fears and frustrations, worries andanxieties, depressions and disappointments, tensionsand tribulations, vanish as mist before the rising sun.I am relaxed. Relax… relax… relax.”

3. To relax a muscle, you must first tighten it,

then let it go. As you let it go, it may perhaps helpyou to utter the words: “Let go, let go, let God!”

4. Turn your attention to the muscles around theeyes. Relax-relax-relax. Open the eyes and imaginethat the eyelids have become heavy. Let them dropon the eyes. Lift them and let them shut three times.

5. Move on to the muscles around the mouth.Tighten them and let go. Relax-relax-relax.

6. Relax your facial muscles. Clench your teeth,then relax, letting your face go limp. Relax-relax-relax.

7. Repeat the process throughout the body: neck,right shoulder, elbow, forearm, wrist, hand, fingers,left shoulder, elbow, forearm, wrist, hand, fingers,back, chest, abdomen, buttocks, calves, ankles, feet,toes. Push your toes down toward the carpet, stretchand relax. Pull your feet up toward the legs, stretchand relax. Relax-relax-relax.

8. Breathe in and stretch your whole body, relax,and exhale. Repeat this three times. Relax-relax-relax. You are calm, relaxed, peaceful, serene. Youare resting at the Lotus feet of the Lord—calm,relaxed, peaceful, serene.

9. You are now lighter than air, moving upward,upward, floating as a cloud—calm, relaxed, peaceful,serene.

10. You are in the presence of the Lord. Offerthis simple prayer: “Thou art by me, a living andradiant Presence, and I am relaxed, calm, peaceful,serene.” Repeat the prayer a few times. You are nowcompletely relaxed.

11. When you wish to close this exercise in relax-ation, rub the palms of your hands together, placethem gently on the eyelids, and gently open theeyes.•

J.P. Vaswani is the author of over 30 books. He is acclaimedas a humanitarian, philosopher, educator, and spiritual guide.The following is from “The Way of Abhyasa” by J.P.Vaswani. Copyright 1995 by J.P. Vaswani. Printed withpermission from Triumph Books, an imprint of Liguori.

Relax!J . P . V A S W A N I

spirit matters to me. So, thank youfor your words that eased my fearsand gave me strength to go on.Somehow, I know I’ll just haveenough to get into that new store—after all, what’s $2000 to the Uni-verse? A mere drop, as far as moneygoes. So, thank you. And alwayskeep your integrity with the maga-zine. The changes in the last fewissues are wonderful, and you areon the right path. So am I, for thatmatter! A toast to following ourdreams—May we all live and lovein the Light! The energy and loveis here—so is the quickening.—Judy Reish, Utica, New York.

A W A K E , A L I V E ,A N D G R O W I N G

In the fall of 1993, LOTUS Jour-nal for PERSONAL TRANSFORMATION

published my Transformationstory. Little did I know how thiswould change my life!

On July 6, 1994, I received aletter forwarded to me from theeditor of LOTUS. It was written bya woman named Tova. She sharedhow my story inspired her andasked if I would correspond. Ilaughed within, “hmmm, could beinteresting,” and called her athome. We talked for about anhour sharing from the heart aboutour “paths” and learning. Howlong it had been and how refresh-ing it was to share so openly andhonestly with a woman.

About two weeks later, I calledTova again. We talked for hours. Ithad never been as easy to commu-nicate with a woman as it was withTova. Six hours later at dawn’slight, we called it a night. I went tosleep that morning sensing some-thing subtle and new in me.


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STOP IN ORSHOP BYMAIL ORPHONE.

CALL FORDETAILS

ANDBROCHURE.

800-270-1961

We continued to talk, write,and share gifts for about a month.The distance between Boston andAustin could not hinder our grow-ing connection. I called her inAugust and said, “I’ll be flying intomorrow night—can you pick meup?” She said she would see me atthe airport.

I wrote in my journal on theplane to Boston: “The closer I getto Boston, the more butterflies Ihave in my stomach. When I thinkabout meeting this lady, my eyesbecome moist, and my heartbecomes heavy. I wonder what itwill be like to see her. Tova, thiswoman who for some unknownreason I opened myself to. Tova,this lady who has cracked mywalls, looked inside of me, andhelped me look at myself openlyand honestly. I think of meetingher and get very emotional.”

The two of us shared three daysof peace and magic. I was broughtto tears more than once whilestaring into her eyes. A week later,on the phone, I asked her to marryme. She replied yes. Our fairy talewas coming true.

In Spring of 1994, after manyflights between Austin andBoston, we started our livestogether in Austin. We have beentogether two years now, and ourrelationship continues to blossombecause of the commitment togrow as individuals, as well as witheach other. It has been a lot ofwork, but our commitment andtrust in each other allows us toenjoy a relationship that is awake,alive, and growing with peace andhappiness shining around us.—Timothy John, Austin, Texas.•

Self RealizationV5N5 P20

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Dancing in The Flames:By Marion Woodman and Elinor DicksonShambhala Publications, 1996240 pages hardbound.

Woodman, a Jungian analyst, and Dickson, aJungian psychologist, explore the attributes of theGoddess as Mother, Virgin, and Crone, images thatthe authors find surfacing increasingly in the dreamsof those with whom they work. “Thisunknown figure whom so many peopleencounter in their sleep speaks to thepsyche and to the very cells of the body.She seems to push through from thevery depths of the collective uncon-scious like a universal force that speaksindividually and culturally.”

The authors describe the scope oftheir work: “In this book we look atsome of the history of the Goddess inorder to orient ourselves in relation tothe past. We look at contemporarydreams in an attempt to discern thequality of her energy, as it manifeststoday. We look at some of the recentscientific discoveries concerning the ‘light in mat-ter.’ Because the Goddess in her virgin aspect carriesthe transformative energy, some of the recent find-ings of psychoneuroimmunology related to thetransformation of energy bring new meaning tometaphors. Hopefully, the new thoughts and newconnections will open new eyes and new ears towhat it means to worship the Goddess. Perhaps too,by recognizing the dawning of feminine energy thatis moving in the collective psyche, we may catchmore of our own personal dreams and ask ourselvesagain, “What is conscious femininity? What doesthe balance of masculine and feminine as a self-reg-

ulating system operating in both men and womenlook like?”

Tracing the history of humankind’s awareness ofdeity as Goddess, in both Eastern and Western tra-dition, the limiting and harmful effects of patri-archy’s suppression of Goddess imagery on bothmen and women are examined. “Both genders needa well-differentiated masculine and a well-differen-tiated feminine. The power structures of patriarchy

have profoundly wounded both,making mature relationshipsalmost impossible without hardpsychic work… The archetype ofthe Black Madonna, or Lilith, orMary Magdalene may be a way tofreedom for both [men andwomen].”

Kali, the Great Mother, firstappears in the Eastern tradition asthe “fierce embodiment of thedevouring mother, who gobbles upeverything, even her own chil-dren.” However, as humanityevolved, later images of the deity

show a halo around Kali as Goddess, pointing toholiness and transformation. “She is black, dark asthe matrix, dark as the vortex, from which all cre-ation comes and to which it returns. To her devo-tees, she is like a black sapphire, radiance shinesthrough her blackness. She dances and laughs withabandon, intoxicated with the mystery she is.”Depicted in her highest form as wife of Shiva, Kaliassimilates the old Great Mother myth into a GreatGoddess mythology.

The authors credit the onset of the Iron Age andits worship of the Sun God with the emergence ofan individual sense of self; this led to the ending of

Book ReviewsB A R B A R A N E I G H B O R S D E A L

humanity’s attendance to the Great Goddess andthe beginning of patriarchy in both religiousimagery and in society. While this phase of humanevolution was essential, it brought with it “our col-lective neurosis, [in which] we have raped the earth,disrupted the delicate balance of nature, and creat-ed phallic missiles of mass destruction. Ironically,in our desperate attempt to keep death at bay (orprevent dissolution, from the point of view of theego) we have brought ourselves to the brink ofextinction. So long as we deny the Great Motherand refuse to integrate her as Goddess in our psy-chic development, we will continue to act out neu-rotic fantasies and endanger our very survival as aspecies.”

Humanity as a whole moved from matriarchyand Goddess awareness to patriarchy and Godawareness. The authors contend that individualsmust make the same journey in their own lives. Fas-cinating case studies appear throughout the book.Analysis of clients’ dreams shows how “individualsfollow a similar pattern through matriarchy andpatriarchy in their attempts to findtheir own lives.”

Woodman and Dickson draw ahelpful distinction between matri-archy and the devouring mother, andthe emerging awareness of Goddessas transformer. “In terms of ourmythology, a new image ofGod/Goddess yearns to be foundwithin ourselves. The kingdom isfirst within. It is manifested throughbody and mind. We are movingbeyond an ego consciousness notonly to an integration of body andmind, but to a transcendence of thebody/mind split, to a new level ofconsciousness based on the dance between soul andspirit.”

The last chapter will be of special interest to thosewho are interested in the convergence of research andthought in the disciplines of psychology, spirituality, andthe new physics. Patriarchy doesn’t work any more, theauthors believe, because it rests on a world view thatdescribes stability, predictability, and entity. But the newphysics proposes a paradigm of process rather than enti-ty, of synchronicity beyond predictability, where para-dox abounds. The authors’ treatment of these conceptsin light of Jung’s “if we possess a grain of wisdom, wewill completely surrender to this unknowable who

embraces in love all the opposites” will open the possi-bility of a new world view for many readers.

The Heart ArousedBy David WhyteCurrency Doubleday 1994337 pages with Bibliography and Index.

Poet David Whyte was startled when he wasasked to write a book about “the life of the soul incorporate America.” This reviewer is equally star-tled, and delighted, that Whyte not only wrote thebook, but writes with a poet’s grace about thechanges confronting corporate America and itsemployees as we move into the 21st Century.

Whyte contends that corporations need toencourage the kind of individual creativity that willresult in corporate flexibility and adaptability. Heidentifies the realms from which creativity and per-sonal artistry spring as the dark, hidden, under-ground, often unexplored part of the personality, ascontrasted with what is currently acceptable in cor-porate life: the light, controlled, ordered, hierarchi-

cal, and predictable. He sees a needto unleash the creativity of individ-uals in corporations, a need that isalso slowly being recognized bycorporation executives themselves.“…Organizations have more oftenseen these underground and seem-ingly eccentric desires as a sourceof continual interruption into theirproduction and purpose. This isnow changing. Continually callingon its managers and line workersfor more creativity, dedication, andadaptability, the American corpo-rate world is tiptoeing for the firsttime, in its very short history, into

the very place from whence that dedication, cre-ativity, and adaptability must come: the turbulentplace where the soul of an individual is formed andfinds expression.” And to shake the foundations fur-ther, the corporation must realize that to allow thecreativity requires making room in the workplacefor the source of that creativity: the heart, soul, con-science, and individuality of the employee.

The poet and the corporation need each other,Whyte contends. “The poet needs the practicalitiesof making a living to test and temper the lyricism ofinsight and observation. The corporation needs thepoet’s insight and powers of attention in order to



weave the inner world of soul andcreativity with the outer world ofform and matter. The meeting ofthose two worlds form the veryheart of this book.”

Whyte uses poem excerptsthroughout the book as a sort ofmagnifying glass, looking at theexperience of creativity and soulgrowth through the lens of suchpoets as Rilke, Goethe, Synder,Machado, Eliot, Williams, Frost,and others, including himself.Beowulf, entering the lake of theunknown, where one might verywell be devoured, but from whichone may emerge into the greaterlife, has a chapter of its own andweaves its way throughout thebook. If high school and collegeEnglish Literature courses wouldincorporate these insights into thestudy of Beowulf, young peoplewho become poets or corporateemployees would be much the rich-er.

Two chapters use fire as animage of the alchemical refiningneeded to live from the creative,and to speak from creative couragein the workplace. The book as awhole is enriched with Whyte’spersonal experiences from which hedraws principles about living fromthe center, from the creative andrenewing depths. In the chapter onspeaking up, “Fire in the Voice,” herelates his experience working withmissionary sisters on furlough,women who had returned com-pletely exhausted from their workserving the poor in such places asPeru, Indonesia, and India. Theirparticular order did not have a tra-dition of inwardness, of contempla-tion or meditation. A woman fromthe Poor Clare order, with its richheritage of silence and contempla-tion, was working in the kitchen,serving the missionaries. Withimmense compassion, the Poor

Clare sister did her work and car-ried her inwardness. Whyte writes,“Witnessing her profound spiritualpresence, I couldn’t help but thinkthat here was a woman who wouldnever burn out, no matter howmuch she applied herself to theouter world. She had an inex-haustible inner light that wouldendure through the direst of cir-cumstances. She had come to thatlight through the ability to say noto everything except the thing mostprecious to her, an inner focusbased on her personal spiritualityand the religious life to which shehad given herself. Out of thoseyears of saying no, blossomed amagnificent yes, magnificentbecause she would be nourishingmuch more than the physical healthof those she would care for—a yesthat could be followed fully becauseafter all those years gathering herpsyche into one single body offaith, every part of her would beuttering it. “Yes!”

Later chapters deal with theimportance of innocence and expe-rience, the soul at midlife, and com-plexity: “Facing What is Sweet andWhat is Terrible” The final chap-ter, “The Soul of the World:Toward an Ecological Imagination”points beyond the individual to thegreater soul of the world, and theneed for an awareness of the cyclesof life. Whyte calls workers to quithiding their depths. “Preserving thesoul means that we come out ofhiding at last and bring more ofourselves into the workplace. Espe-cially the parts that do not ‘belong’to the company.” He concludes,“With a little more care, a littlemore courage, and, above all, a lit-tle more soul, our lives can be soeasily discovered and celebrated inwork, and not, as now, squanderedand lost in its shadow.”

For the paperback edition,

Whyte has added a helpful user’sguide to discussion and contempla-tion, offering thought-provokingquestions that relate to each chap-ter.

Whyte says he wanted to write a“page turner,” and surprisingly,given the depth of the subject, suc-ceeded admirably. In fact, I have ahunch many will turn these pagesmore than once.•


Reviews

BurlingtonCollege

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Music moves us in the coreof our being, bypasses ourintellect, stirs buried emo-tions, settles in our bones,resonates in our heart andsends our spirits soaring.We cannot afford to not

have music in our life. Julia Cameron, author of TheVein of Gold, says that “music moves us at a primallevel. Music speaks to the wounds we have no wordsfor. It heals where all else fails.” She describes musicas the heart’s native language which we speak in blissand in grief. We sing and respond to music intu-itively and unconsciously.

Moving to music releases the trapped energy ofemotions, unhealed wounds, and daily stresses. Wecan literally dance, stomp, and rock our body notonly into health and vitality but into joy and ecsta-cy. Music arouses our body wisdom which moves usto rejoin body and soul.

We have selected some music to help you onyour path. We hope you’ll find something here thatpromotes your transformation. For convenience,we’ve divided the music into four categories.

Category 1: Meditation, Relaxation, GuidedVisualization. Music that aides various forms ofmeditation, relaxation after a stressful day, andsoothing background music.

Category 2: Evocative. Music that evokes deepprocess, stimulating deep feelings, particularly help-ful for emotional and energetic release.

Category 3: Celebratory, Healing. Music thatpromotes emotional and spiritual healing, empha-sizing opening the heart and celebrating life.

Category 4: Dancing, Movement. Music to get

you on your feet, encouraging you to shake out theold, as you celebrate the new.

Naturally, there may be some overlap betweencategories, and not all songs on each album may fitthe category in which placed.

Many of these CDs are available from your localmusic store. If you have difficulty finding them, tryBackroads Music at (800) 767-4748. Category selec-tion by Steve Ryals.

TITLE–Author–Publisher

MEDITATION, RELAXATION, GUIDED

VISUALIZATION

• A SENSE OF PLACE–Eric Tingstad–Narada Lotus

• AETERNA–Constance Demby–Hearts of Space

• BIRTH OF DREAMS–Steve Haun–Ivory Moon

• CHAMBER OF THE HEART– Aeoliah–Helios Music

• DEPARTURES–Stuart Weber–Bridger Records

• DREAM SUITE–Suzanne Ciani–Seventh Wave Productions

• EARTH ASCENDING–Marina Raye–Native Heart Music

• FAIRY OF THE WOODS–Gary Stadler–Sequoia Records

• HOUR OF THE PEARL–Erin Jacobsen–Ursa Minor

• IMAGINARY ROADS–William Ackerman–Windham Hill

• IN THE ENCHANTED GARDEN–Kevin Kern–Real Music

• JIVA MUKTI–Nada Shakti & Bruce BecVar–Shining Star

• JOURNEY INTO LOVE–Sophia–Ivory Moon Recordings

• LEGACY–Ali Akbar Khan–Triloka Records

• PACIFIC RIM, AND UNWIND–Anton Mizerak–Shastasong

• SAVITRI–2002–Dreamtime Records

• SPIRITLANDS–John Huling–Novox Music

• THE NATURE OF THINGS–Bruce BecVar–Shining Star

• THE SILENT PATH–Robert Haig Coxon–Audio Alternatives

• UNDER THE MOON–Deborah Martin–Spotted Peccary

Music TouchesOur Soul


EVOCATIVE

• A VISION BEYOND LIGHT–J. ArifVerner–Spotted Peccary

• ANGELS EMBRACE–Jon Anderson–HigherOctave

• ASCENSION–Dean Evenson–Soundings ofthe Planet

• CANYONS OF LIGHT–Zazen–Miramar

• CELTIC SOUL–Nóirín Ní Riain–LivingMusic

• DANCES WITH WOLVES–John Barry–Epic

• DOORWAYS–Ayman–Real Music

• INNER TRAVELER–Crystal Wind–HigherOctave

• JOURNEY: BACK TO SEDONA–TomBarabas–Soundings of the Planet

• MAYAN DREAMS–Dik Darnell &Tze’ec–Etherean Music

• MEDITATION OF MY SOUL–LeviChen–Ying Yang Records

• NIGHT SONG–Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan &Michael Brooks–Caroline Records

• ONE TRACK HEART–Krishna Das–TrilokaRecords

• RHYTHMS OF PARADISE–DanielPaul–Soundings of the Planet

• SISTER DRUM–Dadawa–Sire EEG

• SONGS OF SANCTUARY–Adiemus–CarolineRecords

• SUNDANCE SEASON–R. CarlosNakai–Celestial Harmonies

• THE GATHERING–BruceMitchell–Millinea

• THE SECRET OF ANGEL ISLAND–ScottHuckabay–Angelnet Music

• UNSPOKEN TOUCH–ElizabethRhoads–White Wind Productions

CELEBRATORY, HEALING

• ALL IS ONE–Yulara–Higher Octave

• ANOTHER STAR IN THE SKY–DavidArkenstone–Narada Mystique

• COMMON GROUND–Douglas SpottedEagle–Natural Visions

• DREAM SONG–Little Wolf Band–TrilokaRecords

• EARTH HEART–Vicki Hansen–AustralianMusic International

• FEET IN THE SOIL–James Asher–NewEarth Records

• HAMSAFAR–Prem Joshua–New Earth

• I BECOME THE EAGLE –ShellyKoffler–Spotted Fawn Music

• IN THE HEART OF THE WORLD–PamelaPolland–Ivory Moon Recordings

• MUSIC OF THE GREAT SMOKY

MOUNTAINS–Gary Remal Malkin–RealMusic

• OUT OF THE WIND–Serah–GreatNorthern Arts

• SACRED FIRE, AND MUSIC OF THE

GRAND CANYON–Nicholas Gunn–RealMusic

• SECRETS OF LIFE–Karunesh–NightingaleRecords

• SKY HIGH–Will Tuttle–Karuna Music

• SPIRITUS–Lorellei–Soundings of the Planet

• TEMPEST–Jesse Cook–Narada Media

• THE EYES OF HOME–Matisha– ExpandingCenter Productions

• THE MEMORY OF TREES–Enya–RepriseRecords

• THE MUSIC OF OLYMPIC NATIONAL

PARK–Mars Lasar–Real Music

• UNION, AND IN LOVE DIVINE–KathyZavada–Precious Music

DANCING, MOVEMENT

• A THOUSAND PICTURES–CraigChaquico–Higher Octave

• DEEP FOREST–Deep Forest–Sony Music

• DUNIYA–Loop Guru–WaveformCorporation

• ECSTASY IN AVILA–Quinn–Shiro Records

• EN TRANCE–Conrad Praetzel–PerfectPitch Music

• FOREVER, AND IN EXISTENCE–BeautifulWorld–Discovery Records

• LUNA, AND TONGUES–Gabrielle Roth &The Mirrors–Raven Recording

• NOMAD–Nomad–Australian MusicInternational

• PRIMALVISION–Randy Roos–NaradaMedia

• SACRED EARTH DRUMS, AND SACRED

SPIRIT DRUMS–David & SteveGordon–Sequoia Records

• SACRED SPIRITS–Sacred Spirits–VirginRecords America

• SEMANTIC SPACES–Delerium–NetworkProductions

• THE CROSS OF CHANGES AND MCMXCA.D.– Enigma–Charisma Records America

• TRANSCENDENCE–Tulku–Triloka Records

• WINDS OF WARNING–Adam Plack &Johnny Soames–Australian MusicInternational•

There isnothing betterthan music asa means forthe upliftmentof the soul…Music touchesour innermostbeing and inthat wayproduces newlife, a life thatgivesexaltation tothe wholebeing, raisingit to thatperfection inwhich lies thefulfillment ofman’s life.—Hazrat Inayat Khan


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of our capabilities.The spiritual path is

twofold. We achieve innerenlightenment and peace forourselves. Then, we use ourtalents and skills and the giftof our human life to make theworld a better place, a morepeaceful place. If we are a doc-tor, we should be the best pos-sible doctor. If we are a car-penter, we should be the bestcarpenter. If we are a musi-cian, we should be the bestmusician we can. In this way,we make improvements in oursociety and make life betterfor all around us. By develop-ing our inner and our outerlife, we will become completehuman beings. We will findfulfillment and peace for our-selves and help others achieveit as well.

We may not be able tochange our life or eliminate itsproblems, but through medi-tation we can look at it differ-ently. Through meditation,we can face life because weunderstand it better. We havethe knowledge to help us faceup to what happens to us withstrength. We will have gainedthe inner peace that comesfrom spiritual consciousness.And we will be a source ofpeace to all around us.

It is my hope and prayerthat each one of you experi-ences this inner peace and inthis way contributes to thepeace of the world.•

From “Inner and Outer Peace throughMeditation,” by Rajinder Singh.Copyright 1996 by SK Publications.Printed with permission from ElementBooks.

Inner PeaceContinued from page 51

choosing to tell the truth. Theopposite is also true. As M. ScottPeck writes in People of the Lie, themore lies we tell, the closer wemove toward embodying our lies.Each lie becomes the delight ofthe dragon of fear who feasts oneach morsel in anticipation of theentree of our whole being.

Sometimes, in the midst ofoften frantic and complex profes-sional decisions, it is difficult todistinguish between solid factsand the apparent realities createdby a high-pressure environment.Here, the body itself is one of ourgreatest aids. The body is a sen-sor of what is true, and what isnot. Because we can easily deceiveourselves in our minds, the bodybecomes the filter for discerningthe truth. If, for example, I beginsaying something that I know is

not grounded in fact, my throatclogs up, and I find it necessary toclear my throat repeatedly. Ques-tioned by an audience, speakersoffering answers that are half-liesawkwardly give themselves away.Eyes roll, hands fidget, voicesquiver, and feet pace. The bodyrebels when the brain tries to dragit into doing something withoutthe body’s permission. This is abasic lesson that a wise and sea-soned poker player learns early.

Truth is the basic currency ofhuman social relations. It is whatstabilizes society, and what allowsfor its existence. Consider this: iflying were the standard behaviorin a society, all knowledge wouldhave to be self-acquired. No onecould trust what was learned fromanother. Economics, as we knowit, could not function. Imagine ifyou couldn’t trust your supplier’sdelivery promise, or your floormanager’s assurance that yourproduct would be ready for ship-ment within the week. Truthful-ness is the lifeblood of the corpo-ration; it forms the final corner-stone—alongside thinking posi-tively and acting ethically—inchoosing the right path.•

From “Leading from the Maze” byJeffrey Patnaude. Copyright 1996 byJeffrey Patnaude. Printed withpermission from Ten Speed Press.


Ethical ChoicesContinued from page 44

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vive. The hardest truths I had toswallow were that I felt alone andabandoned in this foreign country,that I had given up on life formany years, that I adopted a phi-losophy of life with no worldlyaspirations, no loves, no causes tofight for, nothing, just a vapid,dreary waiting game for death toappear and for me to see wheremy next birth, if any, would be.

Self-honesty helped me toknow my fears, physical ailments,loneliness, and alienation, andforced me to make the necessarychanges. Meditation gave me thepeace and clarity of mind to trans-form inwardly, rather than tem-porarily transcending the limits ofthe ordinary mind. Meditationhelped me to accept and love allthat my inner world reveals.

We may begin by seeking formsof meditation that offer realiza-tions and enlightenments, passion-ately devote ourselves to the pur-suits our teachers find worthy, allthe while forgetting that begin-ning human is also ending human.All through our spiritual path inlife, being honest with ourselves isour greatest ally and strongestweapon against the illusions andescapes that so often arise.•

Jason Siff is a former TheravadaBuddhist monk who teachesVipassana Meditation in SouthernCalifornia. He is a founder of theSkillful Meditation Project in LosAngeles, which publishes a freenewsletter on meditation. He can bereached at (213)223-2470. Inner trek/Chicken Soup

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TransformationContinued from page 20

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wrong with self, but rather from aspirit message that tells us that thereis more for us to be, more for us toenjoy. It is not so much a desire tochange as an intention to be moreof who we are. Actually, only trulyradical self-accepting persons willrefuse to tolerate hurtful behaviorin themselves. Self-criticism andjudgmental evaluation actually arelikely to prompt hurtful behavior,while radical self-acceptance,eschewing fierce change, paradoxi-cally generates growth more thananything else. No behavior is toler-ated that leads to discomfort. Andno intended change will occurdeeply without radical self-accep-tance. It is often the most troublingbehavior when deeply accepted,when all aspiration to change it hasbeen abandoned, that changes“behind our backs” (perhapsbecause of the profound loveimplicit in that degree of radicalself-acceptance).

As in all intentions, we must behumble in our aspirations. We maynot really know what is good for us.And, sometimes, what we con-

sciously wish to change may bebehaviors that have served us well.Sometimes, we grow beyond a per-son who has been our friend, andwe must move on. We do this,hopefully, with consideration andtenderness, mindful of the sensibil-ities of the other. So, too, withaspects of ourselves that we wantchanged. It may take a long time.We need to be patient and avoidgrandiose expectations. We arewhat we are, and at any momentthat is a function of the conflictbetween spirit and demons. Self-acceptance is the full realizationthat we are not God—the ultimatepsychological separation, the spiri-tual act of knowing we are all rightjust the way we are.

Receive yourself willingly. Thisis who I am, and it is absolutely OK.Quietly and breathing gently, trythinking this, “From this momenton, I am going to forgive, accept,and receive myself in my entiretywithout exception.”•

From “The Price of Wisdom” by JamesMcMahon. Copyright 1996 by JamesMcMahon. All rights reserved. Printed withpermission from Crossroad Publishing.

Self-AcceptanceContinued from page 58

America includes a quarterlynewsletter and costs $20 a year.You can reach them at 202/872-5307, or send a check to 1612 KStreet NW, Suite 600, Washing-ton D.C. 20006.

Once we are confident that weare investing in companies con-gruent with our spiritual beliefs,the other action we can take is toadopt a long-term view towardthese companies’ profitability.Rather than looking for increasedearnings every quarter, and sellingour stock if it doesn’t happen, wecan give these companies time fortheir far-sighted approaches toreap rewards. Or better yet, wecan support them because webelieve in what they are doing, notjust for the financial returns.

Each of us, alone, is only a sin-

gle consumer; but together, we aremillions strong. What impact dowe want to have on the larger sys-tem? Do we want to abdicate ourright to choose, or do we want toconsciously support companiesstriving for humanistic, sustainablevalues? By being aware of theimpact of our decisions and usingour financial resources to con-tribute to companies that makethe world a better place, we canmake a difference in bringing spir-it to a material world.•


Conscious NotesContinued from page 11

New World Library

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mute our energies on its own. Weneed not manipulate, scheme, oreven plan. It is enough to open theheart to the edge of risk, to allowthe pain, the envy, or whateverother emotions might be present tosurface. Letting go of a precon-ceived outcome, our destinyappears. In this way, seeminglynegative situations become meet-ings with destiny; illness and bank-ruptcy become doors that we walkthrough to move into a greaterreality. As the spasms of non-align-ment subside and the intellect set-tles in its rightful place, we canmove more easily with our heart’sdesire. Rebirth means living the lifeof the heart.•

From “Creating the Work You Love”by Rick Jarow. Copyright 1995 byRick Jarow. Printed with permissionfrom Destiny Books, an imprint ofInner Traditions International.

To summarize: The basic princi-ple of working with the heartchakra is to create a palpable cir-cuit of giving and receiving. Theheart center, the fourth chakra, isitself the fulcrum and can trans-

ProsperityContinued from page 56

80

CommitmentS W A M I C H E T A N A N A N D A

If we truly want to have a more extraordinary life, then we must find a more extraordinary place withinourselves to live from. The choice is ours, and it is up to us to make it happen. Although some people maytry to sell the easy spiritual trip, there are no angels that are going to come down and wave a magic wandover us, and presto, we’re somebody else. All that sort of thing is delusion.

It takes real commitment to walk through the experience of total transformation. The basic practice maybe simple, but it is not easy. It takes work, work, and more work; it takes practice, practice, and more prac-tice.

We start exactly where we are and work from there. The more we practice and find it works, the deeperour commitment will become. This process sets up a powerful self-reinforcing mechanism that allows us tohave real intensity and passion for our practice.

Ultimately, such a deep commitment is like a center of gravity within us: it keeps us firmly grounded inthe work we need to do to be transformed; it allows us to use that work as a lever to lift ourselves above thetensions in our lives over and over again; it is the base from which we can become truly expansive.•

From “The Open Moment,” by Swami Chetanananda. Copyright 1995 by Swami Chetanananda. Printed withpermission from Rudra Press. Swami Chetanananda’s philosophical reflections grow out of years of study, teaching,practice, and experience. Chetanananda is abbot of the Nityananda Institute, a spiritual community based inPortland, Oregon. He is the author of “The Breath of God,” “The Logic of Love,” “Songs from the Center of theWell,” and “Dynamic Stillness.”

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