road map to family engagement

Effective Family Engagement

ROAD MAP To Family EngagementTeam Up for Your ChildMelton Hill Media LLCWendy Lowe Besmann, MHM Team Up for Families Project

Road Map Series Unit 3February 21, 20141Whos in the room, and why?Road Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected]

Todays Goal: Explore these questionsWhat do I want to happen?What strengths, barriers or opportunities could affect this outcome?What strategies might work?What are my top priorities for action?

Road Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] Story: Where are we connected? Why does that matter?

Road Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] do families cope with difficult situations?

Road Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] better or worse, family (bio and non-)Provides the most CONSISTENT source of support and influence. Can NEVER be replaced as a long-term support by an agency or institution.

Agree or disagree?

Road Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected]

Whats at stake?

1 in 5 children with health challenges.Estimated 75 % among those in child welfare. Most serious disorders are heritable, share genetic links (e.g. bipolar and autism). Bottom Line for child-serving staff and agencies???

Road Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] Your Table Family!

Road Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] RIGHT, PASS LEFT

Road Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] Your Job?In 3-5 points, sum up your main job responsibilities as they apply to interactions with families.


Destination: The New Normal

Finding the New Normal .means mobilizing the strength and support a family needs to overcome long-term challenges without getting overwhelmed.Road Map Five Routes Family UnitRoad Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] a child has serious behavioral issues, the parents world is turned upside down. in this new world, most of the ordinary rules for raising kids dont seem to work. Somethings wrong, but you dont know why or what to do. Youre stressed out, angry, confused, and scared.

At first, you might hope the problem will just go away. You think:Maybe theres not enough discipline in this house. Maybe its a phase. Maybe its because we moved...got divorced...had a big change in our lives. Maybe its the teacher. Or those kids down the block. Maybe everything will be okay if . . . ( fill in the blank).Still, the tension is always there. Who knows what will set off the next crisis? You worry about what will happen in the future. You worry about all the simple, fun things your child is missing. As time goes on, you start to feel cut off from that other world of normal families whose kids seem to act in ways that other people understand. At age three our son was diagnosed with autism and bipolar disorder. For the next dozen years, life in our house was tough. Day after day, we coped with a child who would suddenly explode in a fit of scratching, kicking, and biting. He couldnt hold a real conversation, couldnt have friends. He spent a week in a psychiatric hospital. We jumped every time the phone rang on a school day, because it usually meant bad news. And like most such families, we grieved for the normal life we couldnt have.Little by little, something changed. We learned to reach out for help. With good treatment, our sons behavior improved. We learned ways to enjoy ourselves, and to make the hard parts a lot easier. Like so many families who share this struggle, we learned that our job was to build a new kind of normal that makes sense for the life we live. Finding the New Normal means mobilizing all the strength and support you are going to need. It takes work, but it doesnt have to be overwhelming, I promise!

Finding the New Normal

Can mean learning to work with a team of professionals and systems that may not see The Big Picture of a childs strengths and needs.

I only see your child during a 15-minute medication management visit. Pretty limited view from here!

Road Map Five Routes Family UnitRoad Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] huge part of Finding the New Normal is coping with a childs need for behavioral health services. Behavioral healthalso called mental health-- is a way to describe a persons emotions, actions, and ability to manage everyday activities. A behavioral health problemwhich may also relate to a developmental disorder such as autism--can of course affect your child at home, in school, or in many other parts of life. Thats why your childs team may have a lot of members. These may include doctors and therapists, teachers, health workers, or a case manager. Other members of the team may work for government agencies, the school system, or an insurance program. You might deal with some of these people only a few times and deal with others for many yearsbut the main point is, each one only sees part of your childs life and behavior.

That is why--No matter what titles these professionals wear, the real manager of this team is YOU, the parent. Our health and educational system can be so disconnected that the other members need YOU to make sure they work together and understand The Big Picture of your childs strengths and needs. Each professional helps with different parts of your childs situation. Quite often they arent able to talk with each other very easily. YOU are the only one who takes care of the whole child. That doesnt mean you have to run everything or know everything. You cant be an expert on every part of your childs treatment or education. Your job is to keep track of The Big Picture and make sure everybody else sees it, too.

Most children dont improve very much unless their families take an active role. in fact, the best way to get through this strange new world is by learning how to work with your team. All you really need to start are the right pathways and the will to keep going.

Sharing the Big Picture

I know a lot about THIS SYSTEM and how it can help your child.But IM the one who sees THE BIG PICTURE--what happens everydaywhat other providers are doingand what I want for my childs future.Sharing The Big Picture with providers is a familys most important role!Road Map Five Routes Family UnitRoad Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] be the eyes and ears you need.See the child in a variety of environments and time periods..Have a perspective that is critical to providing adequate services.

Family members (biological and non-).


Family Engagement Model ShiftFROMDeficit-basedFamily passivity or non-participationAgency in charge of creating change.

TOStrength-basedActive Partnership,Family and agency in charge of creating change.Road Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected]

Understanding Your Role is Key to Engaging with the Family

You are:A source of support, information, system expertise, boundaries, and modeling.

You are not:The expert on that youth or family.The family decision-maker.The one who will save that youth or family.

Road Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] you have to help a parent value his or her role in the system.Starts when YOU value that contribution and show respect.Continues when that person learns basic self-navigation skills. Reinforced by peer support.Successful when family can function and meet the needs of its members.


Five Routes to Better Services

Keep good recordsbut use shortcuts. Learn key words that open doors.Tell a clear symptom story. Ask questions effectively.Help all professionals who serve your child stay informed about treatment progress and life changes.

Road Map Five Routes Family UnitRoad Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] are hunkering down to life in The New Normal, and we know our job is the share The Big Picture. How do we cut this job down to size? Thats where the Five Routes of the Road Map come in. These are five simple, practical skillsmore like habits, reallythat do wonders for Getting It All Together without getting totallyheres that word againoverwhelmed! Lets look at the Five Routes [READ LIST]. You may have noticed that none of this is rocket science. Its just common sense. Thats what makes it work.

Keep Good Recordsbut use shortcuts.

I keep paperwork organized and available for appointments, meetings, and phone calls. At the end of the year, stick me on the shelfIm a convenient annual record of treatment!

Road Map Five Routes Family UnitRoad Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] you get services, you get paperwork. LOTS of paperwork. A 2-inch, 3-ring binder is the best way to keep it all together and available when you go to appointments or make phone calls to providers. Consider putting a cheap, three-hole- punched calendar (often available at supermarkets and pharmacies) in the front to record appointments and keep track of medication doses when they are being titrated (slowly built up to an effective dose for your child.) Maybe youd like a zipper pouch to keep appointment cards, pens, change for the parking meter. Heres my system: I label the binder with the month and year it was started. Then I add five tabbed dividers labeled personal data, doctor visits, medications, evaluations, school, and insurance and social agencies. In the personal data section, I have a copy of my childs insurance card and Social Security card, plus a standard Health History that includes all the basic information for those forms they make you fill out every time the child goes to a new provider. Add a few sheets of filler paper to each section in case you need to make notes. Some parents like to put the childs photo on the inside front cover. I always tell parents to use a happy photobecause service providers may not always see your child with that face. It can help them--and YOU remember The Big Picture when times get tough!

You may think of other categories and different ways to organize your binder. DO IT YOUR WAY and youll be more likely to keep using it. Its best to use this binder for a year, file it away on the shelf, and then start a new notebook. That way, youll have a convenient record of what occurred during that year. After 20 years of ever-changing medications and therapiesI was pretty glad to have a record.

(Refer to Health History Form pp. 22-25, Important Professional Contacts, p.41. Your Childs Medication Log, page 51.)

Ask questions effectively.

Remember to ask about NEXT STEPS!Ask questions that begin with: Who..WhatWhenWhereWhyCan you please explain?Amazing But True: Busy providers pay more attention when you pull out a WRITTEN list!

Road Map Five Routes Family UnitRoad Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] parents begin this journey with a very big question: Whats wrong with our child? What do we CALL it? We feel as if putting a label on this strange behavior will give us some power to find the magic cure. Unfortunately, its rarely that simple. Mental health centers often have a series of steps for evaluating and treating mental health problems (We have already talked about the typical first step, called the intake interview.) In many cases, youll see a number of different professionals and may not see the same people at your next appointment. Its easy to get lost in this system. Sometimes providers are so familiar with their own systems that they use abbreviations without thinking about it, or forget to mention some of the routine steps in the process.

20

Tell a Clear Symptom StoryA Symptom Story is a list of the top 1-5 things that concern you about your childs health, behavior or development. It can help you and the provider decide where to focus first!

Road Map Five Routes Family UnitRoad Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] are resourceful.Families are the experts on their needs. Families learn from experience.Agree or Disagree?

Road Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] and challenges to navigating systemsTransportation Care of Other Children Balancing Work Demands and Other Appointments Mental Health or Substance Abuse IssuesBlame and Shame (assumed, real, internal, or external).Cultural Factors.Crisis Fatigue (remarkably similar to PTSD symptoms).


Impact of multi-stressor environmentsIndividual or group is affected over a period of time by one or more significant stressors.Unrelenting stress is normal.Stress feels out of ones control.Multi-stressors can make people process information more slowly and make decisions with more difficulty.

Road Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] may think:They dont understand the limitations of my job.That family is too broken to ever help this child.They dont really want to try.They dont know how to parent.They dont really care.They have a mental illness, toothats where the kid gets it.

Road Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] may think:They wont listen to me.Their minds are already made up.They think Im a bad parent. They blame me for my childs behavior.They dont understand what its like at home.They dont realize I have other kids in the house who need things.They dont realize Im overwhelmed.

Road Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected] It: How do families experience your office environment?Road Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected]

What do I need most from this system?What strengths and assets do I bring to the table?What challenges and barriers do I face?Whats my role in this system? What are the basic things I need to know about how this system works?What strategies have worked for other families?What did I learn from this experience that I might want to share with other families?

Breaking up a Big Problem into Tasks You Can Handle

This approach to problem-solving (continued on the next slide) is adapted from a draft peer support tool developed through a collaboration between PA SOC Partnerships Families for Families online learning and support project and Melton Hill Media Team Up for Families project.

Other Strategies for Direct Care StaffRoad Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected]

Crossing the BridgeRoad Map is a trademark of Melton Hill Media. This material may not be reproduced with express permission from the publisher. Contact [email protected]

Families are part of the solution engaging them will lead to better outcomes for youth.Contact Wendy Lowe Besmann at [email protected], 865-803-2286Learn more at http://teamupforyourchild.com

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