resident magazine - issue 12

April 2016 | WWW.RESIDENTMAGAZINE.NET | FOR RATES & INFO CALL: 813-422-5551

RESIDENTMagazineFA I T H F U L LY S E R V I N G T H E W E S L E Y C H A P E L / N E W TA M PA C O M M U N I T Y • APRIL 2016

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A U T I S M AWA R E N E S S M O N T H

The Faces of Autism


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© 2016 RESIDENT Magazine. All rights reserved. RESIDENT Magazine is currently published monthly, distributed by the U.S. Postal Service free to all residents and advertisers in the New Tampa and Wesley Chapel area. Lists are for reference only and do not imply offi cial sanction or recommendation by RESIDENT Magazine. Editorial submissions are welcome. Publisher reserves the right to reject or edit all submissions for length and clarity. The publisher is not responsible for errors or omissions.

Unless otherwise noted, the views, opinions and advertising presented in this publication do not necessarily represent those of the Publisher.

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High school students are only several short years from adulthood – and

with it, the fi nancial freedom to take out loans, sign leases and charge to credit cards. Many teenagers don’t have the patience for long fi nancial conversations, so prioritize the following tasks and discussion topics.

Help open a checking account. Children over the age of 13 can open a checking account in most states with a parent or guardian’s signature. If opening an account is a possibility, go to the bank with your children and sit down with a banker who can help explain how to deposit and withdraw money, use a debit card and the consequences of an overdraft. Having a checking account will help your teens get used to banking and

will make it easier to manage their own money if they have a job, car or other fi nancial obligations.

Encourage a part-time job if appropriate. All children are different, and while some teens are eager to go to work as soon as they’re able, others may need some help identifying appropriate opportunities. If your children are consistently requesting money for gas, clothing or other discretionary expenses, part-time jobs may be a good idea. However, be sure that your children continue to focus time on school work and other important extracurricular activities. A part-time job can help teens establish a work ethic, meet friends and professional contacts and earn some extra cash along the way

Communicate about paying for college. Whether you intend to fund your children’s education or expect them to save their earnings and take out student loans, it’s important that you discuss college fi nances with them. Setting expectations about paying for higher education well before your children are fi lling out college applications is crucial. The longer your teens have to seek out scholarships and save more of their allowance or income from a part-time job, the better. If you plan to pay your children’s tuition, be honest about what you’ll be able to afford, and what expenses (if any) you won’t pay, like room and board or textbooks.

Suggest setting fi nancial goals. If your teens are earning an allowance or a regular paycheck, suggest they

establish two or three fi nancial goals to accomplish before graduation. Whether they wish to save for college, a down payment for a used car or a gaming console, learning to establish and track progress toward a fi nancial goal can help them understand the basics of managing money.

Remember that good money habits can be taught with the right amount of fi nancial support and independence. High school is the perfect time for your children to take on real fi scal responsibilities – and become comfortable with them before the fi nancial pressures of college set in.

Lauren Hopper is a Financial Advisor with Mclendon & Associates, a private wealth advisory practice of Ameriprise

Financial Services, Inc. She offers fee-based financial planning and asset management strategies and has been in practice for 16 years. You may contact her @ [email protected].

Financial Services, Inc. She offers fee-

F I N A N C I A L A D V I C E

Preparing High Schoolers For Their Financial Future

| April 2016 FOR RATES & INFO CALL: 813-422-5551 | WWW.RESIDENTMAGAZINE.NET

I N S P I R AT I O N A L

The Power of Possibility

| April 2016 FOR RATES & INFO CALL: 813-422-5551 | WWW.RESIDENTMAGAZINE.NET P h o t o s b y B o b T h o m p s o n . A d d i t i o n a l p h o t o s c o u r t e s y o f L a u r e n A l i P h o t o g r a p h yB y ST E PH A N I E CO ST OL O

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Continued on page 8

It was a beautiful sunny Floridian day at the park when I met Madison and Makayla.

Their sweet and quiet nature was immediately evident as they stood close to their mom, Susan, while I introduced myself. Their shy smiles are utterly endearing. I had my three kids at the park as well, and most of us headed straight for the swings. Madison and Makayla cautiously approached the swing set; their beautifully thick, curly blond hair was tied up in ponytails, blowing slightly in the wind. Madison seemed to easily slide onto a swing as Susan quietly and patiently helped Makayla try to get into her swing. What takes most children mere seconds to accomplish by hopping up, Makayla has to work hard at. She and her mom took their time, shifting positions while mom was giving pointers and helping to lift her onto the swing. After a few minutes of unsuccessful attempts, Makayla decided to explore the rest of the playground; fi rst stop - check out the slide. She would come back around every ten minutes or so to try the swing again and again. Each time she and her mom would work together patiently and methodically, shifting positions and talking through the process. A lesson in patience and compassion for any lucky observer.

April is National Autism Awareness Month, and April 2nd marks

the eighth annual World Autism Awareness Day. Perhaps you know someone who has a child on the autism spectrum or with Asperger’s syndrome, or perhaps you don’t. According to the CDC, about 1 in 68 children in the United States has been identifi ed with autism spectrum disorder (ASD). That’s a 30% rise from estimates in 2008 and roughly 120% higher than the estimates for 2002 and 2000. Clearly this is an issue which warrants more attention. Susan Gulash, a Wesley Chapel resident, owns a graphic design company called Gulash Graphics and volunteers in the PTA. She is a woman who has been committed to bringing attention to ASD for a number of years now. Susan and her husband, Brian, have been married for sixteen years, having known each other for twenty-four. They have two beautiful daughters; Madison is eleven and Makayla is eight, and both fall on the autism spectrum in similar yet vastly different ways.

It all started for Susan when her fi rst daughter Madison was two and a half years old and began becoming socially withdrawn, even from close family members. At around four years old, Madison was enrolled in VPK when her teacher suggested that she be tested for Asperger’s. Susan recalls, “I said what the heck is Asperger’s? I’ve never heard of it.” The teacher explained what Asperger’s is

to Susan and after having Madison tested, found she was on the spectrum. “Asperger’s syndrome is an autism spectrum disorder (ASD) considered to be on the ‘high functioning’ end of the spectrum. Affected children and adults have diffi culty with social interactions and exhibit a restricted range of interests and/or repetitive behaviors. Motor development may be delayed, leading to clumsiness or uncoordinated motor movements. Compared with those affected by other forms of ASD, however, those with Asperger’s syndrome do not have signifi cant delays or diffi culties in language or cognitive development. Some even demonstrate precocious vocabulary – often in a highly specialized fi eld of interest” (autismspeaks.org). In 2013, the autism community was thrust into a contentious debate due to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders offi cially eliminating the diagnoses of Asperger’s syndrome, pervasive development disorder, and childhood disintegrative disorder. What were once individual diagnoses are now incorporated into a single diagnosis: Autism Spectrum Disorder, in which an individual could be at the top or bottom; low or high functioning . . . the ‘spectrum’ as they say is very broad.

As a parent with little to no experience with special needs children, I asked

C O V E R S T O R Y

Susan a number of questions in order to better understand the ASD world. Take a peek with me into the world of a mother with two children under the same diagnosis, yet manifesting in different ways:

Resident Magazine (RM): How old were your children when you received their diagnoses?

Susan Gulash (SG): Madison was four years old. Makayla was closer to six years old.

RM: How has your life changed since receiving the fi rst diagnosis?

SG: It’s been great to be able to say, ‘Hey here’s a label. Now I can explain this to my family’. My family (at fi rst) just thought that my kids weren’t listening to me, that they were running my life. The hardest thing with my family not understanding was that I began to feel that I wasn’t being a good mom. (RM note: once her daughters received a diagnosis, the extended families were able to get educated on ASD and come to a greater understanding of behavioral issues.)

RM: How have you grown as a person, or what has your experience with autism taught you about yourself?


Continued from page 7.

SG: To have patience. Patience! You have to have patience with these kids. The repetition of the same question over and over and over can drive anyone nuts. But I’ve learned to live with that, and a lot of things that would annoy other people just kind of go in one ear and out the other. It’s made me grow as an individual, grow my own voice, and be an advocate for my kids.

RM: What services in the Wesley Chapel area do you use and/or recommend?

SG: A lot of (the girls’) services are provided at the elementary school, but at USF there are two great organizations. One is called VSA Florida. They deal with adults and kids with all types of disabilities. They have an arts & music program which is outstanding. They have an animation class for autistic kids, so whether they’re Asperger’s or lower on the spectrum, they can go in there and learn how to animate. For more information on VSA Florida – the state organization on arts & disability, check out www.vsafl .org. CARD – the center for autism and related disabilities. If you’re a newbie to this community, they’re the best. They’ll be able to direct you to the different therapies physical, speech… you’ll need. For more information on CARD, check out www.card-usf.fmhi.usf.edu.

RM: From a mother of special needs kids to other mothers out there, what is your defi nition of a successful childhood?SG: Find out what they like in their lives and help them succeed. I’ve learned with these kids; the earlier on you get them into what they like, the more they’ll blossom.

RM: If you could make a request of parents who don’t have special needs children on how they approach the special needs topic

with their kids, what would that request be? How would you want me to discuss with my kids how to act or respond when they see behavior that is out of the norm or something they’re not familiar with?

SG: Tell them that’s the way (special needs children) deal with their worries or fears or excitements in life. That’s just their quirkiness. Explain that (non-special needs) kids have their own quirkiness too.

RM: Have your kids been bullied?

SG: Yes, when Madison was in third or fourth grade and she was doing the stimming with her hands. That’s why the therapies have really focused on teaching her to control that urge, even though it is just her way to deal with emotions. She’s been bullied as

well as my younger one. We were at Wal-Mart last night standing in line for what seemed like forever. As I’m standing there, my oldest had cut her fi nger somehow, so I gave her one of the wipes I had and she was kind of panicking like, ‘Oh my god, is it going to stop bleeding mom?’ That’s another thing – they panic a lot. Finally it stopped bleeding. So then she took the wipe I had given her and she was stimming with it (waving it around quickly). As she was doing it, a girl passed by about the same age, and she just started laughing at her. (Madison) said, ‘Mommy, that girl was laughing at me. I’m just going to ignore it.’ But that’s one of the reasons why the therapies show her how to adapt. My younger one hums and grinds her teeth. Lately she’s been doing a lot of grinding because the curriculum they’re learning is a lot more advanced in the second grade

than in the fi rst, so she’s getting a little frustrated and that’s a way she shows her frustration. Note: Rigid, repetitive movements often characterize “stimming” and/or vocal sounds. Although these behaviors may sometimes look odd, they are comforting to the individual who engages in them and help him/her cope with fear, nervousness, excitement, or boredom (www.mayinstitute.org).

RM: Why would a parent want to get a diagnosis and ‘label’ their child, particularly in the case of a high-functioning autistic child?

SG: I’m asked a lot, ‘Why do I want my children labeled in school?’ It’s because they get physical therapy, occupational therapy, and speech too. And I just tell them simply: If I don’t get them therapies early in life then they cannot enjoy their lives as an adult in society and actually be what the ‘normal’ is. And what is ‘normal’, you know? They’re normal to me! If they were sitting there you would think that they’re completely normal. The way they’ve been brought up and the therapies they have been receiving have helped tremendously. Since they’ve been in the therapies, my oldest is now like a little mommy, taking care of her younger sister and making sure she has food, etc. Before she couldn’t express those feelings. The school has really catered to not just our kids, but also all the kids there. They’ve really fi gured out a way to help the autistic kids in general in order to meet the school’s goals and not make (the children) feel overwhelmed. There was a video a couple years ago where someone who has autism wanted to demonstrate what they go through every day, so they went to Wal-Mart and turned up the volume on their speaker and it’s just overwhelming. And that’s what these kids go through. We have to bring earplugs to Disney because some of the rides are louder than others.

RM: Is noise level a symptom of ASD?



Continued on page 10.

SG: Oh my goodness, yes. It’s sound, light, or texture. Madison has a big issue with sound so if we’re at the movie theater we have to bring earplugs. And even when we went to Disney world, it was quite difficult for her to go in the haunted mansion.

RM: How does a child get diagnosed?

SG: It’s an assortment of tests. You can get it through the school system for free, but the hardest thing is getting to the point where you can say, ‘I think my child has this.’ And then it took almost a year for my daughter to get the tests done. You just have to be an advocate because if you don’t, these kids get lost and a lot of times they get frustrated and end up dropping out of school. A lot of these kids are very smart, especially in the areas they are interested in. Albert Einstein would probably be diagnosed with ASD if he were born today.

RM: If you could have your own billboard and have it say anything at all and put it anywhere, what would it say and where would it be?SG: I would put it by the new mall. ‘Autism is not curable but treatable. We may look different on the outside sometimes, but on the inside we are just like you’.

My discussion with Susan got me thinking about my own children and how easy it could be to miss signs of ASD, particularly with high-functioning autism. Here are some additional facts and symptoms of ASD from www.autismspeaks.org:

• While autism is usually a life-long condition, all children and adults benefit from interventions or therapies that can reduce symptoms and increase skills and abilities. Although it is best to begin intervention as soon as possible, the benefits of therapy can continue throughout life.

Social Challenges • By 8 to 10 months of age, many

infants who go on to develop autism are showing some symptoms such as failure to

respond to their names, reduced interest in people and delayed babbling. By toddlerhood, many children with autism have difficulty playing social games, don’t imitate the actions of others and prefer to play alone. They may fail to seek comfort or respond to parents’ displays of anger or affection in typical ways.

• Subtle social cues such as a smile, wave or grimace may convey little meaning. To a person who misses these social

cues, a statement like “Come here!” may mean the same thing, regardless of whether the speaker is smiling and extending her arms for a hug, or frowning and planting her fists on her hips.

• Many persons with autism have difficulty seeing things from another person’s perspective.

• It is common, but not universal, for those with autism to have difficulty regulating emotions. This can take the form of seemingly “immature” behavior such as crying or having outbursts in inappropriate situations. It can also lead to disruptive and physically aggressive behavior. The tendency to “lose control” may be particularly pronounced in unfamiliar, overwhelming, or frustrating situations. Frustration can also result in self-injurious behaviors such as head banging, hair pulling or self-biting.

Communication Difficulties• Young children with autism

tend to be delayed in babbling, speaking, and learning to use gestures. Some infants who later develop autism coo and babble during the first few months of life before losing these communicative behaviors. Others experience significant language delays and don’t begin to speak until much later.

• Some have difficulty combining words into meaningful sentences.

• Some mildly affected children exhibit only slight delays in language or even develop precocious language and


Continued from page 9.

unusually large vocabularies – yet have diffi culty sustaining a conversation. Some children and adults with autism tend to carry on monologues on a favorite subject, giving others little chance to comment. Some children with ASD with superior language skills tend to speak like little professors, failing to pick up on the “kid-speak” that’s common among their peers.

• Conversely, someone affected by autism may not exhibit typical body language. Facial expressions, movements and gestures may not match what they are saying. Their tone of voice may fail to refl ect their feelings.

Repetitive Behaviors• Common repetitive behaviors

include hand-fl apping, rocking, jumping and twirling, arranging and rearranging objects, and repeating sounds, words, or phrases.

• Some spend hours lining up toys in a specifi c way instead of using them for pretend play. Similarly, some adults are preoccupied with having household or other objects in a fi xed order or place. It can prove extremely upsetting if someone or something disrupts the order.

• Repetitive behaviors can take the form of intense preoccupations, or obsessions. Older children and adults with

autism may develop tremendous interest in numbers, symbols, dates or science topics.

Associated Medical Conditions• Genetic Disorders • Gastrointestinal (GI) Disorders • Seizure Disorders • Sleep Dysfunction

Sensory Processing Problems• Some of those with autism are

hypersensitive to sounds or touch, a condition also known as sensory defensiveness. Others are under-responsive, or hyposensitive.

Pica• Pica is a tendency to eat things

that are not food.

Madison and Makayla are sweet natured, smart, and fun girls. Madison loves animals and wants to be a veterinarian when she grows up. The human body, especially the heart, fascinates Makayla; she wants to be a doctor. I have every confi dence that both girls can and will accomplish their dreams, no matter what challenges they may face. By the end of our park play date, Makayla did make it on the swing! Success! She enjoyed a few minutes of swinging before choosing to get down, saying that the swing was uncomfortable. I totally get it, Makayla – the swings hurt my bottom too!

Sources: Lutz, Amy S.F. “You Do Not Have Asperger’s, and Neither Does Anybody Else.” www.slate.com. N.p., n.d. Web. 17 Mar. 2016.

“Asperger Syndrome.” www.autismspeaks.org. N.p., n.d. Web. 17 Mar. 2016.

“10 Things to Know About New Autism Data.” www.cdc.gov. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 31 Mar. 2014. Web. 17 Mar. 2016.

Harris, Teka J., M.A., BCBA. “Reducing Self-stimulatory Behaviors in Individuals with Autism” www.mayinstitute.org. N.p., n.d. Web. 17 Mar. 2016.

www.vsafl .org

Stephanie CostoloMom. Hypnotherapist. Writer.

Stephanie CostoloMom. Hypnotherapist. Writer.



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VATARESEMBLING THE WIND

PITTAFIERY NATURE

KAPHAGROUNDED AND SOLID IN NATURE

Characteristics Balanced Imbalanced• Thin, light frame• Variable digestion and sleep patterns• Dry skin and hair• Cold hands and feet• Moves and talks quickly• Resists routine• Welcomes new experiences

• Energetic• Creative• Adaptable• Shows initiative• Good communicator• spontaneous

• Overactive Mind• Anxiety• Worry• Inconsistency• Insomnia• Constipation• Gas, bloating

Characteristics Balanced Imbalanced

Characteristics Balanced Imbalanced

• Medium build• Strong digestion• Warm body temperature• Sleeps soundly for short periods• Sharp intellect• Direct and precise• Stays close to routine• Courageous

• Bright• Warm, friendly• Good decision-maker• Leader• Strong digestion

• Angry• Irritable• Excessively critical• Judgmental• Aggressive• Skin rashes• Infl ammation• Indigestion

• Heavyset• Smooth skin and thick hair• Deep sound sleep• Slow moving• Good stamina• Easygoing• Methodical, thoughtful nature• Enjoys routine

• Steady• Consistent• Loyal• Strong• Supportive• Content• Calm

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April EventsWhat’s Happening

Fun and Fancy: Ladies Night OutLadies Night Out A fabulous time for a feel good future.

Join us for this fun and fancy event to learn how the power of friendships and

visiting your doctor for regular checkups can boost your health.

Time: 5:30 pm to 8 pm

Location: Health & Wellness Center, Conference Room 2nd Floor, 2700 Healing Way.

Cost: Free.

Agony of De FeetPresenter: Timothy Charles Epting, DO, Orthopedic Surgery.

Do you suffer from foot pain, stiffness, aching feet or a slight pain in your heel

or ankle? Find out the symptoms and treatment options of foot pain and ailments at this informative presentation.

Time: 12 pm to 1 pm.

Location: Health & Wellness Center, Conference Room 2nd Floor, 2700 Healing Way, Wesley Chapel

Cost: Free.

Staying Healthy During Prenatal Care

Four specialists will provide the best information to be your most healthy

and fi t before and during your pregnancy..Topics include: proper nutrition, exercise, and overall health.

Time: 6:30 pm to 7:30 pm.


Cost: FREE for Members of the Health & Wellness Center, $5 for Non-Members.

Dog Days of DiabetesPresenter: Randy Kiriluk, MD, Family Medicine.

Do you suffer from excessive

thirst, fatigue, tingling, or numbness in your hands and feet? Join us to learn about all aspects of diabetes, from symptoms, treatments to living with the disease.



Cost: Free.

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OTB DELIGHT CAFÉ’March Ribbon Cutting

Friday 1st: WOW - Women of Wesley Chapel

Tuesday 5th: Monthly Business Breakfast

Thursday 7th: Pasco EDC 14th Annual NetFest

Friday 8th: Rotary Club of Wesley Chapel Noon- 5th Annual Adult Spelling Bee

Tuesday 12th: MAA Open Arms Rock Your World Golf Classic

Wednesday 13th: Ambassador Meeting

Saturday 16th: New Leaps Academy 1st Annual Golf Tournament

Tuesday 19th: Monthly Coffee Social

Tuesday 19th: 17th Annual Student Pride Awards

Tuesday 19th: Networking on the Nines at Lexington Oaks Golf Club

Thursday 21st: Lunch N’ Learn - Provided by the Meaning Center, LLC

Saturday 23rd: Children’s Dentistry- Dr. Stepankski’s Patient & Community Appreciation Party

Sunday 24th: Economic Development Briefi ng

Monday 25th: Economic Development Briefi ng

Tuesday 26th: Grow Financial Morning Meet and Greet Mixer

Wednesday 27th: Membership Orientation at Chamber Offi ce

Thursday 28th: Economic Development Briefi ng

Saturday 30th: Tampa Palms Golf & Country Club- Open House Round-Up

FOR MORE INFORMATION GO TO WWW.WESLEYCHAPELCHAMBER.COM.

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“ I know, I know, the gold jacket,” says a smiling Dave Mohren, when asked

why Century 21?

First, a little history. “I lived in Wesley Chapel when it had one zip code, no SR 56, and Bruce B Downs Blvd. was the ‘Road to Nowhere’, exclaims Dave Mohren, Broker and Owner of the newly affi liated Century 21 Seven Oaks Realty. “You had to go south on BBD and use Bearss or Fletcher to get to 275 and we shopped at University Mall. There wasn’t much North past Pebble Creek.” Then it happened. The building explosion. The stores, the strip malls, the communities, the new roads and connectors. “It was an amazing and awesome time to be a Wesley Chapel/Pasco County resident,” says Dave. “And we decided to join in all the fun and move from Meadow Pointe to the newly developed Seven Oaks.” Many people can be overwhelmed by the new construction/buying experience. Not Dave Mohren. “I ate it up!” “Picking a fl oor plan, a lot, color schemes, elevations, going to the design center!” “I was hooked.” And a new career was born.

“I couldn’t concentrate at work.” “All I could think about was real estate and housing and that design center!” He made the decision to leave a stable career as a market

manager with FedEx in 2004 and pursue his newly found passion of real estate. “Within 4 months, I was licensed and working for a builder in Seven Oaks!” I could walk to the sales Model.” I loved it!” Fast forward two years and something was changing in the housing industry. “Sales were softening and the lines around the sales centers to purchase homes on Saturday mornings were gone,” says Dave. “Did you see the movie,

‘The Big Short?’, Yeah, I was basically living that.” In 2005, while working for the home builder, Dave incorporated a little idea of his called Seven Oaks Realty Group. In 2006 he upgraded his sales license to a brokers license. “I’m a planner. I knew working for a builder and having somebody else determine my schedule and earnings was going to be short-lived. So, behind the scenes, I was laying the groundwork for this,” making a sweeping motion to the newly purchased building behind us in the Wind Fair Professional Park on the Seven Oaks Property just behind the Hungry Greek restaurant. In 2007, he left the builder and became the acting broker of his own real estate company, Seven Oaks Realty Group, Inc. “One of my biggest complaints, while working for the builder, was the representation that the

buyers received from agents. It astounded me how uninformed or ill-prepared these agents were. And, in some cases, they were coming from hours and hours away! I remember saying to myself, how can someone live in Sarasota or Orlando and go sell real estate in Tampa!” “I named my company ‘Seven Oaks Realty Group, because when I put that company into action one day it was going to specialize in Seven Oaks and the surrounding town of Wesley Chapel.” Dave Mohren had a belief and maintains it today. “Real estate agents, should be experts in a given locale. If a buyer is moving to Wesley Chapel from Ohio, they should have an agent who can recite where every church, school, park, grocery store, and Starbucks is! The agent should know every community, every builder, the HOA fees and how it all fi ts together to work for that client.” Seven Oaks Realty Group has operated under that mantra for the last decade. It has made them a recognizable name in the Wesley Chapel real estate market. However, in October of 2015, something changed, enter the

‘Gold Jacket’.

“We had been operating as an independent fi rm for the better part of a decade. Over that time our agent head count had grown, as well as our client base, and market share. We went from being a single agent offi ce

being run out of my home offi ce to a fi rm of 30 agents with a property management division of nearly 150 homes managed and ownership of commercial space in Wesley Chapel.” “My time was spent googling better ways to keep up with technology for the agents, or how to attract the international buyer, or how to offer more comprehensive, global marketing packages to our sellers,” explains Dave. And it was then that I decided, ‘Why reinvent the Wheel?’ We had been wooed in the past by the national name brands, so I was familiar with what was out there. I knew most of them were not fi ts from a culture perspective. Just from keeping up with industry information I knew Century 21 was no longer the real estate company that was defi ned years ago by the gold jacket. They were different. The CEO, Rick Davidson, had rebranded Century 21 into a more modern company, and summed up their vision in their motto; Stronger. Bolder.Faster.” Dave and his leadership team met with Century 21 in their Madison, New Jersey Headquarters. “They invited us up to look under the hood, as they put it,” explained Dave. “We liked what we saw and I guess they did too, so we decided to move forward.” Century 21 Seven Oaks Realty offi cially became a reality on October 31, 2015.

“We can now offer our agents the best technology, marketing, and support that any real estate company can offer. We can also offer our clients the best of both worlds; a sense of small, locally owned and operated business, with a fi nger on the pulse of the community; yet list your home with us and we’ll have you global in the morning!” “Its been a ton of fun and I would change a thing,” says Dave. “Although a gold jacket would be kinda cool and retro.”

For more information contact:David Mohern

[email protected] 813.929.7770

www.WesleyChapelMoves.com

B U S I N E S S O F T H E M O N T H

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friends, even best friends. It rushes to divorce, facts don’t matter. It destroys churches, social groups, and work places.

Stop. Just stop. Free yourself from it and fi nd yourself in a better place emotionally, spiritually, and mentally. It’s just not worth it. Think better, speak better, and feel better. In a world where we have so little control, even though we kid ourselves about that, this thing—gossip—we do have control. Be free. Peace, Laurie

Rev. Laurie PalmerDesignated PastorSt. Andrew Presbyterian Church5340 Primrose Lake CircleTampa, FL 33647813-513-8822

We fi ll in the blanks and make something up. It evolves into fact in our

minds, and we pass it on as truth. And like the old children’s game of telephone where you whisper something in the ear of your neighbor at one end of the circle and it comes out very different on the other end, the story takes on a life of its own with little regard for truth.

There. We have successfully lifted ourselves up to great heights and squashed our neighbor with the stone made heavy with innuendo, lies, and malice. We have gleefully spread ill will. And someone gets hurt. Someone’s vilifi ed. And it’s not you. It’s them. Always the other one. Being right all the time is so important even at the cost of personal integrity.

“Well. I don’t know if this is true but….”“I heard this, and I cannot verify, but I

heard that….”“Did you hear about….?”

“So and so is such an awful person, this is what he did….”

“Can you even believe this about her? So out of character.”

“So and so told me this in confi dence, don’t say anything to anyone else. I’m

only telling you so if I hear it from someone else I know who spread it….”

As a poet once said, even the word hisses like a snake: Gossip.Have we looked in the mirror recently? Of what are we capable? What have we done in life that we want no-one to know? Have we made honest mistakes that we don’t want others to see as intentional acts? That doesn’t matter. What matters is spreading stories about someone else like so much manure. Truth doesn’t matter. We get to feel good about ourselves.

Jesus said, “You need to take the log out of your own eye before you take the speck from your neighbor’s.”

Gossip fuels confl ict, keeps people separated, and prevents us from seeing the best in each other. What good is it? Not much. When the temptation faces you, and it will every day, stop and ask some questions of yourself before you spread a story too good to keep to yourself: Is what I’m about to say the truth? If it’s really out of character about the person I’m about to rip, is it because it’s just not true? Is what I’m about to say harmless? What is my motivation

Rev. Laurie Palmer

S P I R I T U A L

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for spreading ugly things about someone else? Is it of absolute necessity that I say what I’m tempted to say right now? What will be the consequences? How would I feel if someone talked about me in the way I’m about to talk about him or her?

Gossip is no little deal, it’s a big deal. It manipulates acquaintances into becoming enemies. It divides families. It causes confl ict between

Free Yourself

It manipulates acquaintances into becoming enemies. It divides families.

It causes confl ict between friends, even best friends.It rushes to divorce, facts don’t matter.

It destroys churches, social groups, and work places. A colleague of mine says, “People make up what they don’t know.”

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resident magazine - issue 12

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