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My Darling’s ECV Owing to the nature of the contents of this volume the editors have at this point carefully omitted the BASTARD TITLE E Clampus Vitus REDIVIVUS 221 Ukant Reed this Wright Oph Not IcE I sHer ebYg I vent Oa Llm eM be Rso fTh ean Ci Nta nDh One Rab lesOc Ie tYo Fecla Mpv sv iT U.S. tHa tyo uAreO r De rEdt o aPp eAran Djo Inw ithth Eot he Rme mBe rsoft Hat no Tab lEso Ci etyat Theh oUro Ftwe Lveoc lo Cicno O nonr used aYte hef Ift had yO fapr I lint Hey eaRni neTe eNhu nd rEda Ndt hIrt Yew On t ThEc Lif Tho Te Lforb uSi Nes Simp oRtAntt OT hEo Rga niz a Tion. Fai Lu sno T

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MyDarling’sECV

Owingtothenatureofthecontentsofthisvolumetheeditorshaveatthispoint

carefullyomittedtheBASTARDTITLE

EClampusVitusREDIVIVUS

221UkantReedthisWrightOph

NotIcEIsHerebYgIventOaLlmeMbeRsofTheanCiNtanDhOneRablesOcIetYoFeclaMpvsviTU.S.tHatyouAreOrDerEdtoaPpeAranDjoInwiththEotheRmemBersoftHatnoTablEsoCietyatThehoUroFtweLveocloCicnoOnonrusedaYtehefIfthadyOfaprIlintHeyeaRnineTeeNhundrEdaNdthIrtYewOntThEcLifThoTeLforbuSiNesSimpoRtAnttOThEoRga

nizaTion.

FaiLusnoT

THEESOTERICBOOKOF

E

BeingSomePreliminaryMaterialsLookingTowardthePotentialDe‐velopmentofFundamentalDataforthePossiblePreparationofanIntroductiontotheHistory,De‐velopment&Characteristicsofthe

TOBECONTINUEDONVERSO

Ancient&HONORABLEORDEROF

E Clampus Vitus

CREDOQUIAABSURDUM

Gathered,collected,arrangedandnowsetintoprintbyCapitulus

Platrixi‐in‐ExilioattheQueenoftheCowCounties

E.C.V.5941(A.D.1936)

ThisBook,THEESOTERICBOOKOF

EisthethirdoftheClampotentSeriesofVolumes

publishedbytheNewDispensation.

Theearliernumbersofthisserieswere:

THECURIOUSBOOKOF

CLAMPUS(Publishedin1935byCapitulusRedivivusatthe

pressofBrotherClamplawtonKennedyinYerbaBuena)

and

THEENIGMATICALBOOKOF

VITUS(PublishedbyCapitulusRedivivusClampdestinely,aftermidnight,attheUniversityofCaliforniaPress,in1934,underthedirectionofBrotherSamuel

T(oogoodtobetrue)Farquhar.)

THISBOOKISAFFECTIONATELYDEDICATED

TOTHEMEMORYOFOURLATEBROTHERANDREVEREDCLAMPATRIARCH

WILLIAMBULL(“BILL”)MEEK,GRANDHONORARYHUMBUG,

TALLESTSTORYTELLEROFTHENORTHERNDIGGINS,GENEROUSFRIEND,

GOODFELLOWEXTRAORDINARY

Contents:

CLAMPREGNANTWORDSOFWISDON,FromLeonO.Whitsell,NobleGrandHumbugoftheGrandLodgeofEClampusVitus

THEANCIENTANDVENERABLEORDEROFECCLAMPSISVITISINPENNSYLVANIA.ByWilliamM.Hall(Whowasthereandsawit)

EPHRAIMBEE,GRANDGYASCUTIS,ANDHISVIRGINIAECVOF1853ByBoydB.Stutler

THEMIDNIGHTRIDEOFJUDGEPEMBROKEMURRAYORTHEINITIATIONOF“STEAMBOATJAKE.”Fromthe“HistoryofSiskiyouCounty,”1881,byHenryL.Wells

THE“TAKINGIN”OFLORDSHOLTODOUGLAS.ByIgnatz

APRAGMATICHISTORYOFGAZINTA,BEINGANEXPOSEOFTHEANCIENT,MOREORLESSHONORABLE,BUTSUPREMELYOFFICIALGAMEOFECLAMPUSVITUS.ByMilford“Panchito”Springer

ANNALSOFTHENEWDISPENSATION

CEREMONYANDRITUALOFINITIATION

GRANDCLAMPROSTER

COMICSUPPLEMENT

CLAMPREGNANTWORDSOFWISDOM,FromLeonO.Whitsell,NobleGrandHumbugoftheGrandLodgeofEClampusVitus

THEYEAR1930shouldbeillustriously“recorded”intheannalsofCaliforniaas“satisfactory”—indeed,asared‐letteryear—foritmarkedtherebirthandrevivalofThe Ancient and Honorable Order of E Clampus Vitus, that hog‐latin, horse‐play,jackass‐braying society which so abundantly contributed to the amusement andedificationofthehard‐working,hell‐bending,rip‐roaringboysofforty‐nineandtheearlyfifties.

An organization, like an individual, should be judged by the standards of theperiod inwhich it flourished:So judgetherollickingClampersof theearlydaysofCalifornia.Theyworkedhardandtheyplayedhard.Therewerefewofthekid‐glove,lounge‐lizard variety among them. They took their fun where they found it, andconsideredagoodbelly‐laughasthebestobtainableremedyforalltheillstowhichthe human flesh is heir. It is recorded that the average Clamper of the elder daycoulddeliversuchastringofroundoldoathsaswouldshaketheraftersofHeaven“with a vehemence so extremely rich and rare as to savor of the fervency andeloquenceofprayer.”

TheClampers’mentalspiritswereeverhighandtheircapacity forspiritsofamore material nature was such as to establish a record which their present‐daysuccessorshaveneverbeenabletoapproach, letaloneequal. Ithasbeendeclaredthatweof todayknow littleof the innerworkingsof theOrderduring theminingperiod,becausenoClamperwaseverinconditiontotakeminutesduringthecourseofanymeetingand,afteritwasover,noneoftheBrethrencouldrecollectwhathadhappened.

At the same time, this roisterous, fun‐making, fun‐loving aggregation ofbibulousgoodfellowscouldseetheserioussideoflife,andtheOrderhaditsseriousmoments.Infact,throughouttheentireMotherLodetheClampersengagedinactsofreliefandassistancewhichearnedthemanenduringplaceintheaffectionsofamultitude of deserving unfortunates—the special objects of their unboundedcharity.

The Order’s ritual bespoke but one stated meeting—the Ceremony ofInitiation—beforeandaftertheFullMoonatthesoundoftheHewgag,followingtheappearance of a suitable sucker in the diggings. The ritual was replete with thesublime and the ridiculous in startling juxtaposition but with the latterpredominating.And theBrethrenofEClampusVitus boldly asserteda genesis forthe Order coevil with the coming into existence of the human race, flamboyantlyrecording,asClampatriarchsofthevenerableinstitution,allthedistinguished—andmanyoftheundistinguished—charactersofantiquity.

TheprimaryobjectsoftherevivalofthisIncomparableConfraternityweretwofold: first, itaffordsanexcuse foragroupofhard‐workingandordinarilyserious‐minded lovers of California’s golden yesterdays to engage from time to time in arollicking get‐together (wholly in keeping, be it said, with the proprieties of oursomewhatdrabperiod),andthustorevivethespiritofhorse‐playandtokeepgreen

for succeeding generations the zest for hilarious comedy which so richlycharacterized that glorious epoch familiarly known as “the Gold Rush days’’; andsecond, it furnishesamediumthroughwhichearneststudentsofCaliforniaandofCalifornianamayacquaintthemselveswitheachother,witheachother’sworkandinterests, and with the gorgeous mosaic of California’s richly worth‐whilebackground. Inaddition, theRevivedOrder seeks to searchoutand toperpetuateimportant source material, and to quicken the public conscience to the vitalnecessityofpreservingandofadequatelymarkingthehistoricsitesofthisgrandoldstate.

It is with pardonable pride that I record the fact—and I declare it withoutshame or shiver—that I am the sole and only holder of that truly historic andvenerable relic, the hand‐carved “Gazinta,” which tradition informs us was firstbrought to our shores by that distinguished Chinese Clampatriarch, Low HungWhang,whoseepoch‐makingvisittotheseshoresinprehistorictimespreservedforposteritythevitalessentialsofthisuniversalbrotherhood.Theglorioussymbolismof this esteemed relic should forever be sacredly preserved in the breasts of thefaithful who have experienced the aesthetic joy of passing the Staff of Relief. Itsesoteric significance should be carefully, nay prayerfully, guarded from theunthinkingmembersoftheprofanepopulace,lestthey,inanattempttoemulatetheexample of our revered Chinese Clampatriarch, should in their ignorance fathomsomeinklingofthehiddenmysteryofourvenerableinstitution.

I cannot let this opportunity pass without calling to the attention of theBrethrenthesadfactthatsincelastweforegatheredtheGrimReaperhastakenhistoll among us, and has removed from our midst our illustrious Grand HonoraryHumbugs,WilliamBullMeekandGeorgeN.Napoleon.Peacetotheirashes!

In a happier vein, however, I feel no inconsiderable delight in being able toreportthatouresteemedClampatriarch,AdamLeeMoore,HumbugExtraordinary,nowinhisninetiethyear,isstillinfullpossessionofhisfortitudinousfacultiesandabletointonewithpristinevigorthatpricelessgemofgold‐rushfolklore,“ForShe’sa Good Woman and I’m a Good Man.” Whole‐heartedly we extend to theClampatriarchouraffectionategreetingandourfraternalregard.

AndnowImustclosemyswan‐songasNobleGrandHumbug.ToallClampers,whithersoeverdispersed,IgrantmyApostolicBlessing:MaythespiritoftheBrethrenofoldbeuntoyouacontinuinginspiration.Maytheinsistentcryofdistressofallwidowsandorphans—andespeciallyof

widows—neverfindyouunprepared.MaytheeuphonioussoundoftheHewgagbeforeverasmusictoyourelongated

auricularappendages.MaytheSignofourreveredmemberoftheanimalkingdom,whenheisinfull

possessionofthisvirilestrengthandvigor,remindyouthatagetakesitstoll;mayyou never experience the pangs of envy when you hear the familiar clarion callannouncing thatdelightsomeperiodwhen“lovehathall seasons for itsown,”andmay you never find yourself in the distressing predicament of that other (andunrevered)memberoftheanimalkingdomwho,atthecrucialmoment,wasfoundwanting.

Finally,mybelovedBrethren,whentheHeavenlyHewgagsoundsandyouhavecrossedtheDarkRiverandareresting in theshadeof thetreesontheotherside,may you hear those welcome and familiar words, so fraught with momentoussignificancetoeverytrueandloyalClamper:

SATISFACTORY

“Andsorecorded!”

THEANCIENTANDVENERABLEORDEROFECCLAMPSISVITISINPENNSYLVANIA.ByWilliamM.Hall(Whowasthereandsawit)

(SeeEditor’snoteonWilliamM.Hallattheendofthissection.)

In1847,whileIwasreadinglaw,therecametoBedford(Pennsylvania),fromthewest,atravelingagentforapatentedinventionofacutting‐box.Heinstitutedanew secret society called the Ecclampsis Vitis. It was in truth a burlesque on allsecret societies—an exaggerated travesty, full of fun and very enjoyable for theyounger members. The secret of the thing was wonderfully well kept for manyweeks, and the society flourished and had grown to large proportions, withnumerouscandidatesforinitiation,atthetimeofthedenouement,whichresultedinitsdownfall.

The society was constituted with a worthy patriarch and two past grandworthy patriarchs, with outdoor sentinels and indoor sentinels, and divers otherofficers.Theceremonyofinitiationwasformal,solemnandimposing.Theplaceofmeeting was the grand jury room of the court house, quite a large room, nowdividedbyapartitionintotworooms,oneofwhichisusedasthesheriff’sofficeandthe other by the recorder of deeds. Behind a long table sat the grand worthypatriarch,JoeMann,ashomelyaspecimenofhumanityasyoucouldfindinaweek’stravel,whowasthenastudentatlaw.Hewassupportedoneithersidebythepastgrandworthies,JohnOttingerandBenCromwell.Theonlylightintheroomwasashortpieceof tallowcandle,which stood in the centerof the table in frontof theworthypatriarch,withoutacandlestick,supportedinanuprightpositionbyaspotofitsowngrease,droppedonthetableforthatpurpose.Thedimlightonlyservedto make darkness visible and show the eyes of the circle of members, who sataroundonchairsandbenches.

The candidate for initiationwas conducted by the friendwho had proposedhim,tothesentinel,whostoodarmedwithamusket,intheentryontheoutsideofthedoor,towhomhemadeknownthathehadacandidatedulyvotedonandnowpresent for induction into the ancient and venerable order of Ecclampsis Vitis;whereupon the outside sentinel rapped thrice on the door,whichwas opened aninch or so, and a stern voice from within demanded, “Who is there and what iswanted?Byvirtueofwhatauthoritydoyouventureintothesacredprecinctsoftheancientandvenerableorderof theEcclampsisVitis?”When informed inextendedlanguage,formalandprecise,ofthenameofthecandidateandofthememberwhovouched forhim, thedoorwasopened and the candidate turnedover, in thedimlight,tothechargeoftwostalwartinsidesentinels,armedwithbayonetedmuskets,eachofwhomtookhimbyanarmandmarchedhimupinfrontofthegrandworthypatriarch,whomoneoftheminformed,instiltedlanguage,“MostworthypatriarchoftheancientandvenerableorderofEcclampsisVitis,wepresentheretoyou,forinitiation into themysteries and benefits of ourmostwonderful, and benevolent,andexaltedorder,Mr.Blank,whoisvouchedforasbeinganintelligent,uprightandvirtuous citizen, free from bodily infirmity, by our most worthy Brother Blank,whose name, having been duly proposed, was voted on, and no single black ball

havingbeencastagainsthim,wasdulyaccepted,and isnowpresent for initiationintothesignandmysteriesofourbeloved,benevolent,andtrulycharitableorder.”

Whereupontheworthypatriarcharoseandputonahatmadeofbrownpaper,imposing‐lookinginthegloomoftheroomandthefrightofthecandidate,andinashort address informed the candidate that the origin of the orderwas lost in themist of antiquity. That it embraced people of all nations—gowhere hewould, hewouldfindmemberswhowouldwelcomehimwithcharitableheartsandhandstoall social privileges.Thathewouldbe taken careof in sickness, and if hediedhewouldbeburiedat theexpenseof theorder.That the societywas far superior toother secret societies which made greater pretentions—that it was older, widerspread and particularly that it excelled them in the fact that its benefits wereextendedwithoutrequiringofthemembersanyfeesorcharges—thatitconferreditsbenefitswithoutmoneyandwithoutprice.Howitdidthiswasamysterythathecouldnotthenlearn,butthathereafter,asheadvancedtotheroyalarchdegree,hewouldknowmore.That secrecywas essential to the existence andwelfareof thesociety, and thememberswere all boundby a solemnoath,whichwouldnowbeadministeredtohimbythegrandworthyscribe.

Hewasthenswornbytheupliftedhand,“InthepresenceoftheGreatCreatorof the universe, from whose all‐seeing eye nothing can be hid, you do solemnlypronounceanddeclare thatyouwill faithfullykeep the secretsof theancient andvenerable order of the Ecclampsis Vitis, and you do solemnly agree that if youviolate this oath, your heart may be cut from your living body and be burned,palpitating,beforeyoureyes, andyourbodybedismembered,andquartered,andburned,andtheashesthrowntothefourwindsofheaven,”etc.

The oath being taken, the candidate was again brought before the grandworthy, who said to him, “I will now initiate you into the signs of the order.Whereveryougothebroadworldaround,youwillberecognizedbythesesignsbythebrethrenoftheorder,andbewelcomedwithjoy.Placeyourchininyourhand,inthisway,insertingtheendofyourchinbetweenyourthumbandforefingerandextending thehandheld level in front of the chin.”When the candidatehaddonethis, he proceeded, “Now wave your hand up gracefully in this way three times,thus” (showing him, and the candidate doing it). “That,” proceeded the grandworthy,“istokeeptheoatsfromfallingout.”

Thiswasthefirstintimationoftheburlesqueexceptthepapercap,but,inthenoveltyofthesituationandthegraveandsolemn‐lookingsurroundings,andinthedim light, the candidatewould fail to notice the intimation of the oats, as he hadpreviouslyfailedtonoticethetallowdipandthepapercap.TheG.W.P.wouldthenproceed:“Iwillnowteachyouthegrandhailingsign.Putyourhandsinthisway,asIdo.”Hewouldthenputanextendedhandoneachsideofhishead,withhisthumbsagainst his temples and the fingers upward, like a mule’s ears, and require thecandidate to do the same. “Now, move them backward and forward three times,thus.”Furtheraddressingthecandidate,“Youwillnowrepeataftermethesewords:When—repeat, sir! When—shall—we—three—meet—again?” This being done,raising his hand solemnly, the grand worthy would cry with a loud voice, “Evennow,” andwould unroll in front of the newbrother a large picture of twomules,which hewas left to look upon, and the initiationwas over, amid the uproarious

shoutsoflaughteroftheassembledthrong,whouptothistimehadbeenasmuteasmice.Somewouldstanddazed, somegotmad;but ina fewminutesallwouldgetoveritandbereadytoenjoythefunofinitiatingsomebodyelse.

Well,wehada torch‐lightprocessionallover townandaspeech. JacquesW.Johnson,ayounglawyer,deliveredanorationontheorderinthecourthouse.JudgeBlackwastheretohearit,andoldMr.Russellandallthebeautyandthechivalryofthevillage, Johnson’sorationwas inmanuscript,and JudgeBlackborrowed itandread it through with a great deal of pleasure, he said. He couldn’t understand,however,howthesocietyexistedwithoutlevyingcontributionsonitsmembers;hecouldn’t possibly see or comprehendwhere the funds came from. But thatwas amysteryonlytobelearnedbyinitiationintotheroyalarchdegree,andthejudgedidnotseemwillingtogothatfar.

JohnOttinger andBenCromwellweremadepast grandworthies because oftheir ability to sit and look wise with grave faces. Nothing would stir the facialexpressionofeitherintoanimationexcepttheimmediateprospectofadropofoldrye.

OneofthelaughablefeaturesofthemeetingswastocalluponP.G.W.Ottingerforastory.Duringtheintervalsofinitiation,abrotherwouldriseandgravelymovethatP.G.W.Ottingernowfavorthelodgewithanarrationofsomelittleincidentorstory from his extensive repertory. This being voted, in response, Ottinger toldalwaysthesamestory,utterlyobliviousthathehadevertolditbefore.Itbecameamatter of absorbing interest to see how often he would, with no glimmer ofrecollection that he had previously told it, re‐tell the story, and as long as theinstitutionsurvived,someeightortenweeks,Ottingerrepeated,withagraveface,thesamelittlestory,andwoundupwithapeculiarlaugh,whichcontortedhisfacebut gave forth no sound, except a rumble, as if a laugh were rolling aroundsomewhereinthecavitiesofhiscapaciousabdominaldevelopment.

Cromwellrodeattheheadofthetorch‐lightprocession,aschiefmarshal,onagrayhorse.Theregaliawasastripofmuslinabouttwoyardslongandfourincheswide,whichpassedovertherightshoulderandwasfastenedinaknotatthewaistontheleftside,ornamentwithastarcutoutoftheheavypurplecoloredpaperthatloafsugarusedtocomein.Fortheofficersthemuslinwasblue.Thetorcheswereballsofcandlewicksoakedinturpentineandfastenedwithwireuponuptightsticks.TheBedfordbandheadedtheprocession.

SamuelShuckwaschairmanofthecommitteeonregalia,andJohnH.Fillerofthecommitteeontorchlights.

Dr. Keyser was the first man to betray the order. He had been peculiarlyanxious for initiation.Hisnamewaspendingagoodwhilebeforehewasvoted in.Somehowwe fearedhemightdivulge it,andhesitatedto trusthim.Hisanxiety tojoinsprangfromanideathattheorderwasgoingtobeagreatpowersociallyandpolitically—justthethingforarisingyoungdoctortobelongto.

ButKeyser,wheninitiated,gotfuriouslymad,andwouldnotbeplacated,anddenouncedtheorderasaburlesque.Wetalkedsomeofdrowninghim,butdidn’tdoit. Our funwas done for, and the ancient and venerable order of EcclampsisVitispassed away forever, so far as the village of Bedfordwas concerned. Butwe hadfun—lotsofit—whileitlasted.

(Editor’sNote: Doggone if I ain’t gone and lost the dope on this fellerHall,‐‐if I ever had it,whichIdisremember.Yousee,thatolddufferTomNorrisprickedupHall’sbookofremy‐nitionsesinsomeoldbookstoreandbyaccidentfoundthisherechapteronEclampsisVitisinPennsylvaniainitis1847.ThsslyoldTom,theoldrascal,hewentoffeastagainaforewecouldgethimtoputdownthebiblygrafikdetailsforthisherenote.Leastwise,ifheeverdidit,wecan’tfinditno‐how.Andwe’vehadTon’swholefamilyhuntingforthebookforaweek.He’sgotalockedcaseandnobodycan’tfindnokeytoit,andTom’sfergitwhereheputitbytelegraph.Soifthereherebookisinthereyou’llhaveto wait till the next Clamper book for the dope. So there, I wash my hands of this whole durnbusiness.Ed.)

EPHRAIMBEE,GRANDGYASCUTIS,ANDHISVIRGINIAECVOF1853

ReprintedfromtheWestVirginiaReviewforAugust,1931.ByBoydB.Stutler

“There is a vein of humor and absurdity running along through humannaturethatmakesthewitandclowntheadmirationofthemassofmankind.HenceitisthatFalstaffandArtemusWardaremorepopularthatHamletandJuliusCaesarorMiltonandLordBacon.Therealwitoftheworldisnotanartificialproductbutanaturalone.AndthegreatestandmostoriginaloneIeverknewwasanunletteredsonofWestVirginia—EphraimBeeofDoddridgeCounty.”

This estimate of the notedDoddridge County citizenwaswrittenmore thanthirty‐five years ago by onewho knew him in the flesh. To the people of centralWestVirginiafiftytoeightyyearsago,EphraimBeewasapersonage,combiningthequalificationsofa shrewwitand loveof funwithakeeneye forvalue inahorse‐tradeoradealin“wildland.”Totheyoungergenerationhehasbecomesomethingofa legend,sogreatandwide‐spreadwashis fame. Inthissamesectiontherearefewwhohavenot heard their elders tell stories aboutEphraimBee, andperhapsfewer who have not heard of a burlesque secret order that flourished under thenameoftheEClampusVitus.

Likethatofhismorefamouscontemporary,AbrahamLincoln,Bee’sreputationasaraconteurandpractical jokerhasgrownwith theyears. It is true,storiesandjokes have been told as coming from Lincoln or Bee thatwould be as strange tothemastotheEmperorNapoleon.Butthatisthepenaltyonepaysforgreatnessortheacquiringofareputation.

LincolnandBeehadmoreincommonthanasenseofhumor.Theywerebuiltonsomethingofthesamearchitecturallines—long,lean,andlanky,andwithfacesthatcouldnotbetermedhandsomebytheirdearestandclosestfriends.Theyweresavedfrompositiveuglinessonlybythatsamesenseofhumorandsoftened,kindlyeyesthatlitupandredeemedanotherwiseunprepossessingphysiognomy.

EphraimBeecameofsturdypioneerstock.HewasthesonofAsaBee,asoldierintheNewJerseylineduringthewaroftheRevolution,andwasbornatSalem,NewJersey, about 1799. His father’s family joined the westward movement of theSeventh Day Baptists early in the nineteenth century and, after a brief stop inPreston and Taylor counties, established their home at Salem,West Virginia, theSeventhDaytownestablishedin1794.There,AsaBeebuildedhishomeandreareda family of almost patriarchial dimensions. Thirteen children formed his familycircle,whichaccountssomewhatforthefrequencywithwhichthenameisfoundinWestVirginia.

Ephraimwas received into theSeventhDayBaptistChurchat SalemonMay17,1822,accordingtotherecordpreservedinCorlissFitzRandolph’sSeventhDayBaptists inWest Virginia.Hewasmarried to CatherineDavis on June 19, 1823. Ayearorsolater,withhiswidowedmotherandothermembersofhisfamily,hetookup his residence on Meat House Fork of Middle Island Creek, where they had

obtainedproprietaryrighttoastripoflandsomefourmilesinlengthandabouthalfamileinwidth.

In 1828, Ephraim established himself as a blacksmith atMiddle Island, laterknownasLewisport,atownthatwasbutisnomore.Thelocationofthistownwasopposite the present town of West Union, county seat of Doddridge, and theestablishmentofthelattertownmarkedthedeclineandfallofLewisport.

The blacksmithing businesswas good. Bee’s smithy had no competition, butthere were not a great number of people to serve. To add to the family income,Ephraimandhisgoodwifeopenedatavernfortheentertainmentoftravelers.Thehostelrybecamejustlypopularandwassoonmadearegularstagestop,wherethepassengersbrokethetediumofthejourneywithfoodanddrink.

Thefoodservedatthetavernwasofexcellentquality,andtheentertainmentfurnishedbyminehostandhiscronieswasofthehighestorder.Nonecouldtellastory better than the proprietor, and few could draw a horsehair bow across thefiddle‐stringswith suchpleasingeffect as couldEliTucker.A travelerwhovisitedtheplace in1846saysthathehadasmoking‐hotdinner,consistingofboiledhamand greens,mashed potatoes, dried peach pie, and store tea, with an “appetizer”thrownin,allforapricethatseemedhardlyenoughtopayforthecooking,thoughplentyoffirewoodcouldbehadforthechopping.

Itwasthissametravelerwho,whenhelearnedthenameoftheproprietorandobservedthenumberofchildrenplayingabout,saidthat ithadneverbeforebeenhis pleasure to dine in a Bee hive. This observation tickled the fancy of theproprietorsomuchthatforyearstheinnwasknownbythatname.

Thepassingyearsbroughtmorepeopleintothecountry.Theblacksmithandhotelproprietorbegantoturnhisattentiontolandspeculationasameansofaddingto the familybank‐roll.Hebecame interested inpublic affairs andwasoneof themovingspirits in thecampaign for the formationofanewcounty,with,ofcourse,Lewisport as the seat of justice. But in this he reckoned not the strength of theownersofthelandjustacrossthecreek,whoalsowantedthecountyseat.

DoddridgeCountywasformedin1845,andBeeandhisfriendsenteredintoaspiritedcontestwithCaptainNathanDavisandhisson‐in‐lawPrestonF.Randolph,for the locationof the county seat. This rivalrywasperhaps intensifiedby an oldtroubledatingfrom1831,whenCaptainDavis,asajusticeofthepeace,returnedajudgmentagainstBeeinalawsuit.Beechargedfavoritism,andacontroversyarosebetween the twomenwhichbecame so acute that theMiddle IslandSeventhDayChurchtookcognizanceofit.BeeandDavisweremembersofthechurch,thenbutveryrecentlyorganized.Afterformalconsiderationofthematter,Beewasrelievedofhisdutiesasclerkofthechurchuntilthedifferenceswouldbeadjusted.

Ephraim lost his fight. Victory perched on the banner of the Davises andRandolphs,andthetownofWestUnionwasestablishedtobecomethecountyseat.Joseph Diss Debar, who was not a party to the scramble for the location of thecourthouse,butwhoarrivedonthescenewithinayearafterthelocationhadbeenmade, said that “the great secessionwar,which settledmany another neighborlystrife about a stray sheep or a breechy pig, brought about a state of retributionwhichsentEphraimBeetotheLegislatureandPrestonRandolphtoCampChaseasaprisonerofwar.”

Like Lincoln, Bee told stories in his inimitable way to illustrate his point ofviewortobringaboutahorse‐tradetobetteradvantagetohimself.Hewasamanofgreatnaturalabilityandofstrongcommon‐sense,thoughpossessingbutlittlemorethantherudimentsofaneducation.Hewasastudentofmenratherthanofbooks,andknewmuchofthenatureofmankindthatisnottaughtinschoolsandcolleges.Manyofhispractical jokeswereaimedat theAchillesheelof thevictim.Certainlyhisgreatestjoke,theEClampusVitus,wasalevelerofprideorfeelingofsuperiorityinthecandidatewhofacedtheGrandHotentoteandhisminions.

Man is a gregarious animal. He finds pleasure in the society of his fellows.Manymeninwhomthesocialinstinctishighlydevelopedareinveterate“j’iners”ofsecret societies, someofwhichhave flourished for ages. Itwas just this tendencythat first suggested to Ephraim Bee the possibility of formulating a ritual andestablishingasecretorderofhisown,ifonlyasaburlesqueuponexistingorders.Hefeltcalledupontoenlargehisreputationasafunsterbyspreadingthesunshineofhispersonalitytodistantplaces.Hisjobwastoproduceagrinwhereonlyacrouchhadflourished.

It is not known just when the first “exemplification” of the secrets andmysteriesof theancientandexaltedorderofEClampusVituswasgiven.PerhapstheritualwasworkedoutandperfectedatWestUnionasearlyas1850.By1853itwasbeingintroducedtoothertownsandhadwonaveryconsiderablefollowingofzealousmembers.Itsgreatpopularitymaynothaverestedsolelyuponthemeritsoftheorderorthemoralteachingsofits“unwrittenwork,”butasarichburlesqueonthe secret, oath‐bound political societies then in popular vogue. These societieswent under the names of the “Sons of ‘76” and the “Order of the Star‐SpangledBanner,whichin1854unitedintheKnow‐Nothingpoliticalpartyandatthattimethreatenedthepoliticalbalanceofthenation.

BeeclaimedtohavederivedhisknowledgeofthemysteriesoftheorderfromChina, through the good offices of Caleb Cushing. The noted MassachusettsstatesmanandjuristwassentasacommissionerfromtheUnitedStatesin1843toopendiplomaticrelationswiththeCelestialKingdom,andremainedintheFarEastuntil1845.Chinawasa landofmystery,andthereportofMr.Cushingoccasionedmuchdiscussion.

Mr.BeeannouncedthattheEmperorofChina,whowastheGrandHotetoteofthe order, had selected a descendant of the great Confucius to bring to him acommissionasGrandGyascutis,authorizinghimtoextendtheworkandinfluenceofthe very ancient Chinese order of E Clampus Vitus. The scion of the house ofConfuciuswaschargedtoinstructthenewGrandGyascutisintherules,secrets,andsacred mysteries, and to communicate the grip, signs, and password. Theorganization was shrouded in all the mummery and mystery of establishedsocieties,buttheriteofinitiationvariedwidelyfromtheformalceremonies.

Itissaidthatthefirstrealsuccessoftheancientandhonorableorder,thenbutrecently evolved from the brain ofMr. Bee,was at Richmond, towhich place thefounderhadgoneonsomepoliticalmission.Hegainedahearingandinitiatedsomeof themembers of the Legislature.Within a short time the rolls of theRichmondbranchborethenamesofnearlyallofthemembersofthataugustbody,including,itissaid, thenameof themayor.Thegovernorwasapproachedandwas inclinedto

favor suchapopular societywithhisdistinguishedpresence;but someof friends,whoknewalittletoomuch,persuadedhimthatthedignityofhishighofficewouldnotpermitassociationwithasocietyofsuchhumbleorigin.

Elated with his success, Mr. Bee discarded his title of Grand Gyascutis andarrogated to himself the dignity of Grand Lama. As such officer, and claimingjurisdiction over the continent of North America, he commissioned a number oforganizers,eachwiththetitleofGrandGyascutis,andtheseorganizerslaboredwiththeenergyandzealofnewconverts. Impromptuceremonialsand initiationswereheldinvarioustowns,usuallyduringasessionofcircuitcourt.ThustheEClampusVitus spread from county seat to county seat and from town to town,withmanyvariations in its rites and ceremonies. A Colonel Yancey, assisted by a Dr. Eagon,madehisappearance inthetownofWestonaboutthemiddleofNovember,1853,forthepurposeofspreadingthelight.AreportoftheiractivitieswaspublishedintheWesternHerald forNovember 28,which also assured the public that ColonelYancey“islegallydeputizedandcommissionedbytheGrandLama,EphraimBee,tolecture and initiate in the honorable order, within the limits of northwesternVirginia.”TheColonelseemstohavebeenazealousworker.Thenewspaperreportshim as saying in his lecture on the origin and progress of the order that it was“destined to bring within the pale of brotherhood the whole family of Adam.” Itfurther says that several applicants presented themselves and were solemnlyinitiatedintothesublimemysteriesoftheEClampusVitus.

OfthefounderofthehonorableordertheHeraldsays”“Mr.Beewasthefirstcommissioned Grand Gyascutis for the United States of America by the GrandHotetoteofChina,buthebeingaverypopularlecturer,sacrificinghistime,money,etc.,tothegreatwork,hassincebeenpromotedtothedignifiedofficewhichhenowfills so honorably to himself and so satisfactory to the brotherhood throughoutNorthAmerica.”

With all the elaborate background, there was none of the philosophy ofConfucius in the teachings of the order. It was a burlesque pure and simple, soconceivedandsocarriedout.Manywhohadundergonetheinitiationbecameveryzealousintheireffortsintheireffortstosecurenewtyrosinanefforttoevenupthescore,whileothers,perhapsofamoreseriousandsoberturnofmind,becameverythoroughly disgusted Those of the class made much of a mystery of the “lodgesecrets”inordertoattractfliesintotheweb.Thedisgustedoneswerequietbecausetheydidnotwantittobecomegenerallyknownthattheyhadbeenadmittedwithinthe“paleofbrotherhood.”

The founder’s brotherwas onewho could find no appreciation of the broadhumoroftheoccasion.Hiscuriositywasaroused.Hewantedtoknowwhatitwasallabout, buthedidnotwant to “jine” the lodgewhenEphraimwaspresent.A verykindfriendarrangedwiththebrethrenatWeston,manymilesdistant,toconfertheseveraldegreesuponthebrother,atthesametimeadvisingEphraimofhisaction.Aspecial ceremony was arranged—extra‐special in honor of the distinguishedcandidate.Memberswere invited from Clarksburg,West Union, and other towns,andGrandLamagraced theoccasionwithhispresence, thoughkeepingdiscreetlyoutofsightofhisbrother.

Thedegreeteamgavehimthewholeworks,withflourishoftrumpetandrollof drums. After being released from the chamber of mysteries, though he hadreservedaroomattheoldBaileyHouse,hemountedhishorseandrodethroughthenight tohishome severalmilesdistant.The ceremonyhadbeena torture tohim,andhewashumiliatedandashamed.Uponhisarrivalathomeitisreportedthathisonlygreetingtohisfamilywasafewexplosivesnorts.Buthesurvivedtheordeal.Itis not recorded that he became a proselyter for the very ancient and honorableorderorwaseverabletotakeprideinhismembershiptherein.

An anonymouswriter in the Parkersburg State Journal in 1896 gave a briefoutline of the initiatory ceremony. “The candidatewas initiated in a roomwherethere was only a blue or red glimmering light, with every member more or lessdisguised.The first thing inorderwas a solemnprayer andadoleful song,whichsignifiedthemisfortunesanduncertaintiesoflife.Thecandidatewasthensworntoanswer any and all questions that might be propounded to him by the GeneralHotetoote. These questions were often of a very delicate and embarrassingcharacter, and the replies often brought upon the victim the shouts and jeers ofthosepresent.

“The form and ceremony depended upon the peculiar idiosyncrasy of eachindividual applicant. If he was sensitive and proud somemeans were devised tohumiliatehim; ifhewas self‐conceitedandvainhewas compelled todisrobeandplungeblindfoldedintoatuboffouloricewater,accordingtotheseason,andthetortureandsupplicationsofthevictimsaffordedmerrimentforallpresent.”

Enthusiastsrang thechangeson theancient formsuntilat times the foundercouldscarcelyrecognizehisownhandiwork.However,thenobleorderofEClampusVitus flourished for many years, and when crowds gathered at the circuit courtterms itwasanever‐failingsourceofamusement.Someof themostdistinguishedmen ofwestern Virginiaweremembers of the society and on solemn ceremonialoccasions took theirplaces in the torture chamber toassist in receiving strangersinto thebrotherhood.A fewof themenwhoarerememberedasservingasGrandHotetoteoftheirrespectivedivisionswereJ.M.Jackson,Sr.,atClarksburg:JamesM.StephensonandJacobBeesonBlairatParkersburg;RobertS.BrownatRipley;A.A.LewisandJohnMorrowatWeston;andAndrewS.CoreatHarrisville.Thenamesofmany men who later held high office, even that of governor and United Statessenator,wereinscribedontherollsofEClampusVitus.

EphraimBeeoutlivedhisorder,butthememoryofbothremainsgreen.Talesofthehigh‐jinksofthelodge,toldinthehearingofaboywho,somethirtyyearsago,loafedaroundalawyer’soffice,hadaverydecidedinfluenceinshapingsomepartsoftheinitiatoryceremonyinhispostofthe“OrderoftheAmericanBoy.”Eventheboyswere“J’iners”inthedaysbeforetheauto,movie,andradiocameintogeneraluse.

EphraimBee gainednot a little in reputationby the successof his lodge.Hewas known personally inmany parts of the State,where carried on an extensivelandbusinessandperiodicallymadetheroundsonhorse‐tradingandcattle‐buyingtrips.WhentheCivilWarbrokeoverthelandhebecameanardentsupporteroftheUnionandanenthusiasticNewStateman.Hewasthenmorethansixtyyearsofage,fartoooldtogointothefieldforservices.Hewasjustasvaliantinhomeservice.

HebecameacandidatefortheLegislaturein1863,thefirsttoassembleforthenew State of West Virginia. His opponent was Joseph H. Diss Debar, a talentedFrench‐Alsatianwhohadsettled in thecountysomeyearspreviouslyas theagentforagreatlandcompany.DissDebarhadyouthanddashandvigor,avastreserveofsell‐assurance,andalmostimpregnablepoliticalalliances.Hewasafoemanworthyofthebeststeeloftheveteranhumorist.Whenthevoteswerecounted,DissDebarwasapparentlyelectedandpresentedhimselfatWheelingonJune20,1863,readytotakehisseat.Mr.Beewasalsoonthegroundand,atthefirstopportunity,filedhispetitioncontestingtheseatofMr.DissDebar.AcommitteeoftheHousepassedonthemeritsoftheclaimsofeachcandidate,andafterafewdaysreportedinfavorofMr.Bee,whothentookhisplaceintheLegislativechamber.

Diss Debarwas an artist of nomean talent. For some years he had amusedhimselfbymakingverycreditablesketchesofpeopleandplacesthatinterestedhi,andhewasequallyathomeinthefieldofcaricature.ThehomelyfaceandungainlyformofMr.Beelentthemselvesreadilytothatformofart,andasalastretortDissDebardrewa ratheruncomplimentary sketchofhisopponent,dated it1863, andfileditawayinhisportfolio.Thedateleavesbutlittledoubtthatitwasdrawnasaresultofhispiqueatbeingousted.Hewas,however,not entirelyoverlooked; theLegislature that denied his admittance as amember commissioned him to designtheStateSeal,whichisstillbeingusedwithoutchange.

ThetasteoflegislativeservicewassweettoMr.Bee.Hewastwicereturnedtothecapital,thenatWheeling,torepresentDoddridgeCounty,inthedevelopmentofwhichhehadcontributedsomuch.Heservedinthesessionsof1966and1867,andthenmoreorlessretiredfrompubliclife.Helivedoutalongandusefullife,and,in1888,waslaidtorestinhishomecounty.

THEMIDNIGHTRIDEOFJUDGEPEMBROKEMURRAYORTHEINITIATIONOF“STEAMBOATJAKE.”

Fromthe“HistoryofSiskiyouCounty,”1881,byHenryL.Wells

(ReprintedfromWells,HarryL.,HistoryofSiskiyouCounty,California,1881.Chap.XVIII,Scenesand`

Incidents,p.111,etseq.)

“Listen,mychildren,andyoushallhearOfthemidnightrideofPaulRevere.”

INANCIENTDAYStherelivedaJew,whomadeYrekahisabiding‐place,andengagedintheuncertainvocationofselling“drygootsandclodingssheepforcash.”HerejoicedinthenameofJacobEhrenbacher,whichhadbeenhisfromthecradle,buthowevermellifluousandeuphoniousthismayhavebeenintheowner’sears,ithad to give way in the ordinary affairs of life to bemore popular pseudonym of“Steamboat Jake.”How thismarvelous changewaswroughtandhowaprominentjusticeofthepeacefledfromthewrathtocome,istheprovinceofthischronicletorelate.

ItwasinthepalmydaysofYreka,intheyear1856,thatMr.EhrenbacherfelthisheartdrawntowardsthenobleprinciplesofOddFellowship,andsoughttounitehimselfwiththatorder.Hisactions inthematter ledthosetowhomheappliedtobelievethathewantedtojoinforthepurposeofbecomingsick,apparentlyso,andenjoyingthebenefitsdevolvingupononeinthatcondition.Itwasresolvedtopunishhimandgivehimsuchanideaofsecretsocietiesaswouldbanishfromhismindallthoughtofjoiningoneinthefuture.

There existed at that time, 1856, in Yreka a Judge of themost Ancient andHonorableOrderofEclampusVitus,anorderthatexistedsolelyandsimplyforthesportthatcouldhehadininitiatingnovicesintoitsmysteries.Theceremonieswerethemost ludicrousandawe‐inspiring that the fertilebrainofmancouldconceive.Intothisorderthreepracticaljokersofthetown,PembrokeMurray,GeolW.Stilts,and Wiley Fox, proposed to induct the inquisitive and mercenary Jew. Theyrepresented tohim that for themodest sumof fiftydollarshe could join theOddFellows,Masons, andEclampusVitus, and tookhis application and cash, having aroyal good time with the latter. The most appalling ceremonies of the EclampusVitusaswellasallthemeanstheycoulddevisebywhichamancouldbedeceivedand frightened, were arranged in one grand programme, as he was not to beinductedregularlyintotheorder.Allthegoodfellowsintownwerepostedodntheaffair,whethermembersoftheorderornot,andwhenthenightcamewhichwastoremove the veil of the confiding Hebrew, the hall was crowded with eagerspectators.Theceremoniescommencedinthemostsolemnandimpressivemanner,andastheyproceeded,everandanonthewholeassemblywouldgiveasepulchralgroan,towhich,accordingtoinstructionspreviouslygiven,thecandidateresponded“Timbo.” As the evening wore on and he became more and more terrified, hispronunciationofthemagicwordbecamelesdistinct,untilnothingcouldbemadeof

itbut“Steambo,”andhebecame“SteamboatJake”uponthespot.Atonetimeitwasrepresented to him that each of the three ordersmust brand himwith a red‐hotiron, and to fully impress himwith the reality of the intended act they began todispute among themselves as to which order took precedent. Pembroke Murraydated the Masons back to Moses, but Stilts settled all dispute by conclusivelyproving thatAdamwas the firstmemberof theEclampusVitus,and to thatorderwas granted the privilege of first putting its brand upon the now thoroughlyfrightened man. Great demonstrations of heating an iron and making otherpreparationsweremade, andwhen all was ready hewas touched upon the barebackwith a piece of ice. In his imagination he could feel the scorching iron burndeepintohisfleshandheboundedintotheair,screechingtheintensityofhispainand fright.Hisyells andcries couldbedistinctlyheardablockawaybypeople intheirhouses.Foralongtimehewrithedandshriekedundertherelentlessdeceptionof his persecutors, while all were convulsed with laughter. Finally his nervoussystemgavewayunderthestrain,andhefelldownina fit, frothingat themouth.Themerrimentwassuddenlychanged to fearandapprehension.Theunconsciousmanwasbornetohisstore,wherefourphysicianslaboredoverhisforanhour.Nooneexpectedtoseehimopenhiseyesto the lightofdayagain,buthewasat lastresuscitated, and all dangerwas past. Before thisMurray had gone home, havingwordwithStilts tocometo thehouseandtellhimtheresult.Assoonas thegoodnewswas announced, Stilts said to JohnLong, “John, have you got the old cayusesownatthestable”

“Yes.”“Well,we’llhaveagoodjokeonMurray.”“Howso?”“Why,I’llgodownthereandtellhimtheJewisdead,andwemustleavetown

toavoidarrest,andyousendhimtheoldcayusetorideon.”Theplanwaswelllaid,andallthelaterevelerswereinthesecret.Stiltswent

toMurray’shouseandrappedsoftlyonthedoor,whichwasopenedbytheanxiousjustice.Assumingamostlugubriousexpressionofcountenance,hesaid:

“He’sdeadasasmelt,andI’mgoingtoOregon.DaveColtonisgettingoutthepapersnowtoarrestus.I’vetoldtheboysweweregoingtoOregon,andDavewillhearofit,andridetotheKlamathferrytocaptureus.Nowtherewillbeahorseherein a fewminutes,mount him, and get to Shasta as quick as you can. I’m going toOregononfoot,andIwillbeacrossthelinebydaylight.”

Sayinggood‐bye,hestruckoffinthedirectionofOregonatarapidpace.Soona horse was led cautiously up to the door by George Waterhouse, who assistedMurraytomount,andcharginghimtogetoutofthecountrybeforedaylight,badehimGodspeed.

Theoldcayusewasapackanimal,towhichanygaitfasterthanadrowsywalkwasanutter stranger.He tookso long topassanygivenpointasaprocession. Invaindidtheanxiousfugitiveonhisbackcluck,kick,andswear.Hehadnospursnorwhiptoencouragehimwith.Ridingupinafencehebrokeoffthetopofapicket,andwiththiscommencedavigorousprodding,elicitingaspasmodictrotofhalfadozensteps,andthenthewalkwasresumed.Againandagainwasthebruteproddedandagainandagaindidherespondwithabone‐rackingtrotofsixsteps.Afterplodding

slowlyalongMainStreetuntilMinerwassafelypassed, theexasperatedmangaveventtohisfeelingsinafloodoftearsandimprecations.“Thisisaprettybeasttogiveamantosavehis lifewith,”heblubbered.“If Ihadapistol, I’dshootthemanthatgave him to me. If I only had a knife I’d cut the brute’s throat. Get up, you lazyhound!”heshoutedashedugthefencepicketintotheoffendinganimal’sribs.“Getup,getup;I’dwalkifIwasn’tlame;getup!Oh,I’llshootthemanthatdidthis.”

Justthenthejokers,whohadfollowedclosebehindhimbegantoyell,“Therehegoes,”andtofiretheirpistols.Thesensitiveearofthefugitivecaughtthesounds,and he redoubled his exertions to entice a trot from the old cayuse, but in vain.WileyFoxsoonovertookhim,mountedonafinehorse.Ashecameupheasked:

“Isthatyou,Murray?”“Yes.Isthatyou,Wiley?”“Yes,andyouhadbetterhurryup;theyareafterus.”“Ican’thurry.”“Whynot?”“Why,thefoolshavegivenmeanoldcrow‐baitthatwon’tgooffawalk.Have

yougotapairofspurs?”“No.”“Haveyougotaknife?”“No;why?”“Iwanttocuthisinfernalthroat.”WhentheyarrivedatGreenhorn,Wileyturnedaroundandsaid:“I’mgoingbacktofacethemusic;comeon.”“No.”“I’llseeitthroughifitcostsmeeverycentI’vegot.NoJewcandrivemeoutof

town.”“Ifyou’regoingbackletmetakeyourhorse.””No,let’sbothgoback.”“No,Iwon’t.Letmetakeyourhorse.”“Murray,you’retheworstsoldmanIeversaw.”“Why,theconfoundedJewisn’tdead;it’sallajoke.”Silently he sat and cogitated; then turned the old cayuse about, and slowly

plodded toward the town. Therewas no sleep for the jokers that night, but theirshoutsandlaughtermingledwiththeclinkofconvivialglasses,untilthestarsfadedfromthesky.

Stilts and Fox have moved away, while Murray has been gathered to hisfathers, but the woes of “Steamboat Jake” and the midnight flight of the worthyjusticewillberepeated inYreka longafter theirboneswillhavemingledwiththeelementsofnature.

THE“TAKINGIN”OFLORDSHOLTODOUGLAS.ByIgnatz

Seated inaquiet cornerofhisLondonClub, the staid,dignifiedandhighlyrespecteduncle of theMarquessofQueensberry,HisHonor, Lord SholtoDouglas,seldomallowshisagingandratherJohnBullishmindtowanderuntetheredamongthe wild oat patches of his far‐away youth. Especially does he eschew—whensober—allconsciousremembranceofthatveryfar‐awayandextremelyundignifiedchapterofyouthfulindulgencewhenhetouredwithatravelingtroupeofHamstherather beastly back‐country of the American Far West—don’t you know?—andparticularlyhisvisitstothethenquiteseedyandgenerallyuncivilizedvillagesoftheerst‐whilegolddiggingsalongthedustyfoothillsofthelandofCalifornia.

Buttherearemoments!Moments when, in silent meditation over a satisfying Scotch and Soda, His

Lordshiprelaxesthebondsofmemoryandopenshismentalposterngateforawildandattimesorgiasticsortieofrecollections.Anditisusuallyduringthesippingofthe seventhhigh‐ball thatLordSholto’smindcustomarily seeksout those strangeexperiences in the then—tohim—unlovely townofMarysvillewhenhebecameaClamper.

Then it is that thishonorabledescendantof theBlackDouglas, this scionofthegreatJamesDouglas,whocarriedtheheartof“TheBruce”totheHolyLand,thismuch‐married but now extremely settled‐down Peer recalls with momentaryfeelings of mingled pain and delight that wild night over forty years ago on thebanks of the turbid Yuba when the embattled Brethren of our Ancient andHonorableOrderopenedwidetheirheartsandgloriously“tookhimin.”

LittledoesHisLordshipreckthatoutuponthat lonelyshorethememoryofthat eventful night still lingers on, to the delight of the Brethren of the NewDispensation. Little does he think that there now flourishes in those far‐awayfoothills the Lord Sholto Douglas Chapter of the Revived Order. Just what LordSholto would say if—while sober—he were to be apprised of these startling buthighlyindubitablefactsmustbelefttotheimagination.

Itwas during the soggymonth of January in the Year ofOur Lord eighteenhundredandninety‐sixthatthesomewhatdiscouragedgroupofwould‐beandhas‐beenactorswaswendingtheirwaythroughthissectionoftheYankeewilderness.Arrived inMarysville, the twenty‐fouryearold “Lord”andhisbrideof less thanayear,thepetite“LadyDouglas,”néeMooney,sawlittletoencouragethem.Whenthecurtainroseon“DoctorJekylandMr.Hyde”ontheeveningofthe21st,theaudiencewasnotonlyapathetic,butpitifullysmall.Thetotal“take”oftheboxofficewasthemiserable sum of $71.00,‐‐not sufficient to pay themembers of the company andleaveenoughovertogetthemtothenexttown.Theyouthfultroupersweredownatthemouthaswellasattheheel,andHisLordship,whowasthecompany’smanager,aswellas its leadingman,was inahighstateofdespair; itseemedimpossible forthealready‐scheduledperformancestocontinue.Gloomsettleduponthefirmament.

Thencamethemiracle.Wearefortunate inthefactthata fullandcompleteaccountofwhathappenednexthascomedowntous fromthathoaryperiod.Theverynameofitsauthorhaslongbeenlostinthemistsofpassingtime,buthistale,obscuredthoughitbetowardtheendbytheswirlofalcoholicvapors,deservestobe rescued from the oblivion in which it has lain so long. It is entitled “TheInimitableInitiationofLordSholtoDouglas.”andgoesasfollows:

LordSholtoDouglaspacedthefloorbackstage.Ashepacedtoandfrobehindthe curtainshewrunghishandsandmuttered tohimself: “What shall Ido?WhatshallIdo?ItellyouI’mruined!Utterlyruined!”

Oneofthestage‐handsseeinghisLordshipinsuchafrenziedstateinquiredofhim:“Mygoodfriend,whatisthematter?”

“Matter? Matter? Cawn’t you see what is the matter? Look at this bloody‘ouse—Thebloomin’nativesof these ‘ereparts refuse towitnessmyhexibitionof‘istrionicability. I say, I’mpositivelydisgusted, to saynothingofbeingreduced tothestatusofamerepauper.Featureme,amemberofthenobility,withoutablastedshilling inmy pocket! It sounds incredible—However, when aman’s ruined; he’sruined.I’djollywellliketoknowwhatIcandoaboutitthough?”

The stage‐hand being a rather benevolent character endeavored to comforthis Lordship. Taking the Britisher aside the stage‐hand said: “I see you don’tunderstand the people and conditions of this locality, which extends for about ahundredmilesthroughtheminingregions.Youseethesepeoplearekindofclanishandhavetheirownpeculiarways.It’smighthardforanoutsidertocomeinanddobusinesswiththeminabigwayunlessyoufallinwiththemandjointheirsociety.Onceyoujointheirorganizationandgetthesecretpasswordyoucangoanywhere,doanythingandcarryonyourbusinesswithoutanytrouble.Andanotherthing,I’msureitwouldmeanyourshowwouldbeasuccess.”

UponhearingthisLordSholtoDouglasseemedtotakemoreofaninterestinlifeandthethingsconnectedwith it,andsaid:“Isay,whatsortofasociety is thisthing?Just‘owdoesagentlemangoaboutgainingadmittance?Andbythebye,oldchap,‘owmuchdoesitcost?I‘avenoreadycash;butifthejollyfellowscuffit;I’mwillingtobecomeamemberoftheblinkin’thing.”

“It’s called the Clampers. I don’t know the real name because I’m not amember; but I know some of the people who belong and will introduce you tothem—fromthenonit’suptoyoutoseeiftheyarewillingtoadmityou.”repliedthestage‐handinamostmatteroffacttone.

Lord Sholto Douglas made his application in the due form and upon itsacceptanceadatewassetfortheinitiation.TheapplicationsignedbyhisLordshipconsisted of quite an imposing document made up of innuberable questions andforms. As far as the “Clampers” were concerned he was accepted before theapplicationwasstarted.HisLordshiptooktheentireproceedingfrombeginningtoendasaveryseriousmatterandthroughouttheinitiationlookedupontheritualasbeingasolemnandsomberaffair.The“Clampers”neverattemptedtodisillusionthegentlemanandthenightaftertheinitiationwhenheappearedonthestageandgavethecountersignoftheWellJackass,hisLordshipreceivedagreatovationfromthepackedhouse.

Icannotrecalltheexactdate,but“Amanmayforget,andnotbetheworseforforgetting.”However,attheappointedtimeLordSholtoDouglaspresentedhimselfforinitiation—dulyinstructed;properlyclad,androyallyintroduced.Accompaniedbytheguard,hisLordshipenteredthehall.

(From this point on Lord Sholto Douglas will inform you as to what tookplace.)

“With‘andsandfeetfetteredbymassivechainsandshacklesIenteredaroomofmostextraordinarydarkness.Isay,oldthing,itwassodarkafellowcouldn’tsee‘is own ‘and before ‘is face. With the bloody guard a‐leading me I was told toadvancewith thegreatestof caution, as Iwaswalkingondangerousground.Anddon’t you know, it was deucedly chilly on the bare feet. Sent the shivers up anddownme back, and all that sort of thing. All of a sudden the blasted guard says:“’alt—SoI ‘alts.Andthentheblighterleavesmeastandingthereinthecoldalone.NextI‘earsavoicefromquiteadistanceaboveand‘ecommandsmetoanswerhisbloomin’questionswhileIstandthere‘alffrozen.‘esays:‘What’syourname?’SoItells‘imm’name.Nextthefellowaskesmemyage,occupationandfinallywhatmydesires were for ‘aving dared to enter this dreary and desolate region alone. Iinformedthebawlyfoolthat‘eknowverywellmydesirewasthatIshouldlearnthemysteriesofthebloomin’order.

”Then this same bloody, far‐off voice from somewhere above me says: ‘Itbeing your request to advance in this order I will free you from the chains withwhichyouarenowbound.’Andat ‘iscommandthemiserablechainsandshacklesfellwithamosttremendouscrash.

“I thought the blighters would turn on the lamps and continue the beastlyceremony, but to my consternation that deuced voice continues: “’Lord SholtoDouglasyouarenowfreefromanyobstructionofyourperson.Atthepropertimeyouwill advance alone throughmanyobstacles;‐‐through thorns andbrambles inthefirststageofyourjourney.Youwillthenenterthecaveofsilenceandwhileinthere will be protected from any storms which you may encounter, for in thisdesolate and barren region we are accustomed to terrific thunder storms of theseverestnature.On leaving the caveof silenceyouwill turn to theEast emergingfromdarknessandyouwillthenseethelightoftherisingsun.”

“AtlastIreachedthecaveofsilenceandIthoughttheyweregoingtobeattheblastedpipetopieceswiththeirinfernal‘ammerin’.Soundedlikeabloomin’boilerworkstome.‘oweverIgotoutofthatmesswithlosingtoomuchofme‘ideandwaswondering what sort of a thing was next on the ghastly menu when the sameghostlyvoiceinthedarknesssays‘Atthefootoftheclifftotheleft,youwillfindasmall jewel casewhichyouwill takewithyouanddefendwithyour life.Youwillnowbowtotherisingsun,acknowledgingthatyouhavetheboxofjewels.’

“SoIbowstotheEastandwhilesobowingsomechapgavemesuchaseverejoltinmyposteriorregionIthoughtmyspinalcord‘adbeendriventhroughthetopofmyblinkin’‘ead.Atthistimeandplacesomechapinformedmethatthepasswordof the Order was O. M. A., which I often repeated as I passed my ‘and over myalreadytenderposteriorextremity.

“TheregionwhichIwasnowpassingthroughwasabeastlyone—nothingbutblisteringrocksanddriftingsands.Whilecrossingthisbleakexpanseaboutadozen

disreputableblightersaccostedmeandasked if I ‘adseenaboxof jewels they ‘adlost. I told theblathering idiots I ‘ad thebloomin’ boxmyself and ‘ad instructionsfromtheNobleGrand‘umbugonlytodeliverthebloodyboxtothepersongivingmethe proper sign and password for the receipt of the box. The ruffians againdemandedthejewelcasket,anduponmyrefusaltopartwiththebeastlythingthebeggarssetuponmeandendeavoredtotakeitbyforce.Inthescufflethatfollowedoneofthescoundrelsbashedmeontopofthe‘eadandknockedmesenseless.

“Fromthenonuntilconsciousnessreturnedallisbutconjecture.“Iratherimaginethescoundrelsthoughttheyhadkilledme.Theyfoundsome

oldslabsandmadeasortofacasketorother inwhichtoplacemybody inorderthattheymightcarryitmoreeasily,fortherewasnoplacetodigagrave,thegroundbeing so rocky and hard. Evidently therewas a river close at ‘and so the blinkin’foolscarriedmetotheriverbankandtossedthebloodycoffinwithmeinitintotheicywaters.Nodoubtthebandthoughtifthebodywerefoundthereitwouldtellnotales. But the box being so poorly constructed when I was in mid‐air I fell out,carrying thebottomboardswithme.The icywaters refreshedme and I regainedconsciousness.Itookinthebloomin’situationataglanceandremainedquietuntiltheruffiansdeparted.I thencrawledfromthereedsofmyoozingandicybedandfoundthatInowhad‘ECLAMPUSVITUS’—ATIGHTGRIPONLIFE’.”

We of this Latter Day make due obeisance to the unknown author of thissprightly tale, butwe recognize that theBrethren of theNewDispensationmightwell consider it somewhat apocryphal were it not for the following actualnewspaperaccountsoftheoccurrenceofthateventfulnight.*

ThisishowtheMarysvilleAppealforJanuary22,1896,relatedtheincident:

HE IS A CLAMPER __________

Lord Sholto Douglas Was Initiated Last Night

___________

A BIG CROWD WAS THERE ___________

The Show Plays Here To-Night at Invitation

of the Order – Last Night’s Performance Good

___________ Lord Sholto Douglas, third son of the Marquis of Queensbury, one of the most

famous peers of the British Realm, is a member in high standing of the Ancient and Honorable Order of E Clampsus** Vitus. He was initiated last night with all the pomp and dignity usually attendant on like occasions and having answered all the solemn questions and manfully shown his capacity, is now from henceforth shall ever be, a Clamper of noble degree.

*We are now told that “Doc” Barr, N. G. H. of King Solomon Lodge, is the unknown author of the account above reprinted. Insasmuch as, from the newspaper story, he appears to have been on the committee which took Lord Sholto in, he ought to know. (Ed.) **The added “s” is clearly apocryphal. (Ed.)

The initiation took place at the lodge headquarters in Turner Hall. Every Clamper was on hand and the hall contained over five hundred souls. N.G.H. Forbes administered the degrees assisted by Noble Brother Wallace Dinsmore who read the charge from the high place. All the secret work of the order was carried out. After the candidate had been initiated into the mysteries of the order he was requested by the lodge as a body to hold his company over for one night and to either repeat the performance of last evening or change the bill and play at the theatre tonight. The lodge guaranteed its brother Clamper a full house if he would remain and he agreed. After the regular business of the lodge had been transacted they adjourned to the money factory chamber and there the plan of action for filling the house was laid out.

N. G. H. Forbes appointed the following committee of citizens: Norman Rideout, Judge Davis, Will Swain, W. H. Carlin, E. A.Forbes, Dr. J. H.

Barr, J. H. Tranyer, O. F. Stoodley, Ben Cockrill, W. Dinsmore. James Morrissey, Sam Ewell, George Eckart, A. P. Lipp, Bill Leech, F. W. Johnson, Fred Buttleman, W. T. Ellis & Son, J. R. Garrett Company, Sam Trayner, Prof. Wills, Ike Colin and Henry Flint. This committee will meet at the office of Forbes & Dinsmore this morning and will start out to sell tickets for tonight’s performance. The proposition of the Order is to fill the house. Among the courtesies extended to Lord Douglas as a Clamper will be the services of the orchestra tonight free of charge. Prof. Wills volunteered. Lord Douglas, Clamper, was the recipient of a great deal of congratulation for the way in which he took the degrees clear up to the 169th.

NextdaytheAppealreported:

LORD SHOLTO DOUGLAS INITIATED INTO E CLAMPUS VITUS

Yesterday Lord Sholto Douglas and his lady were entertained by the Ancient and Honorable Order of E Clampsus Vitus in a manner befitting their station.

A carriage and four-in-hand was turned out and under the espionage of N. G. H. Forbes, the noble pair accompanied by Henry Stuart of the American Farce Company were driven around the town in style.

At 10 o’clock in the forenoon most of the committee appointed by N. G. H. Forbes met at the office of Forbes & Dinsmore and tickets were distributed to all the members present. The went to work with a will and inside of two hours over five hundred tickets had been disposed of for last night’s performance.

At 2 o’clock in the forenoon most of the committee appointed by N. G. H. Forbes met at the office of Forbes & Dinsmore and tickets were distributed to all the members present. They went to work with a will and inside of two hours over five hundred tickets had been disposed of for last night’s performance.

At 2 o’clock the four-in-hand with Henry Elmore in the seat, was driven up to the Western Hotel and Lord and Lady Douglas were taken on. A short time after a hack containing Wm. Leech with the huegag (sic) was driven around the town and the lusty

lungs of the auctioneer made the huegag give forth sounds that rattled the window panes in the buildings on both sides of the street as the carriage passed by.

The crowd on D Street has not been so large as yesterday for a long time. The thoroughfare presented the appearance of a holiday in every sense of the word. Last night the theatre was filled. The company was in good form and presented two acts from “Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde” and “Confusion,” very successfully.

The demand to see and hear Lord Sholto was complied with. He came on the stage and addressing the audience as “ladies, gentlemen and fellow E Clampsus,” introduced his wife. This was “satisfactory” and so “recorded” by the E Clampsus present. Likewise was the dancing and singing of her ladyship.

Lord Sholto isproud of his membership in the ancient order and last night expressed great regret that he would be unable to see the degree work. The candidate for last night failed to pass the rigid examination of the medical board. He also said that he would always bear Marysville in mind. He could not forget the place and people.

“They have true appreciation of merit,” said he. “Last night they only gave us “$71.00 to see our show and to-night we get over $300.00. That shows the great hospitality that exists. No, we don’t expect to find many towns like Marysville.”

And this is what the San Francisco Examiner for January 23 remarked:

JOINED THE CLAMPERS ______________

Lord Douglas Tossed In a Blanket As An Initiation Into the Order

_______________

Marysville, Jan. 22.—Lord Sholto Douglas is a member in high standing of the Ancient and Honorable Order of E Clampus Vitus, a secret organization that has a flourishing branch in this city. For short, the order is known as the Clampers.

Last night Lord Douglas played “Confusion” at the theatre. After the performance was over the sonorous tones of the Hewgag floating over the city warned all good Clampers that a stranger sought admission into their order. Presently 500 men had assembled within the walls of Turner Hall to witness the ceremony of the initiation. The Clamp Petrix announced that he who sought admission was no less a personage than Lord Sholto Douglas. When he had been blindfolded, the shoe removed from the right food and the pants leg rolled from the right knee, the work of introducing him to the mysteries of the order was announced.

His ride in the wheelbarrow over a ladder, and the elevating influence on a blanket in the hands of 40 stalwart brothers were appreciated by the candidate. With three cheers for England and America the meeting adjourned.

A moment more and we are done. It was in 1933, when the Brethren made a

pilgrimage to Camptonville, that our late respected Brother William Bull Meek unleashed the shackles of his memory and related—as only “Bill” could relate—the story of that gorgeous night in old-time Marysville. At the very close of the impressive ceremony of initiation, said “Bill,” after all had apparently been accomplished to the entire satisfaction

of the assembled Brethren, the English Lord was directed to stand before the N. G. H. for “Final Instruction.”

Then it was that Bill Meek’s classic poetic effort was delivered with the most telling effect of its eventful half-century of history. Silence stalked serenely about the Hall of Comparative Ovations.` The Noble Grand Humbug rose in all his dignity. Lord Sholto stood respectfully before him. In solemn tones the mighty truth rang out:

“When you have crossed the River

And joined the immortal class, You’ll never forget the Clampers Who made you a _________ ________!”* *A certain Chinese proverb has here unfortunately been deleted by the Clamprognosticator, and it is said that there is now no man living who can discern the hidden significance of the cryptic passage.

APRAGMATICHISTORYOFGAZINTA,BEINGANEXPOSEOFTHEANCIENT,MOREORLESSHONORABLE,BUT

SUPREMELYOFFICIALGAMEOFECLAMPUSVITUS.*ByMilford“Panchito”Springer

*AttheClampowwowatSutter’sFortonFeb.22,1936,RogerDalton,N.G.H.ofPlatrixChapter,presentedagrandioseGazintatoLeonWhitsell,N.GH.ofYerbaBuenaChapter.Today,asaresultofthisoccurrence,Leon“O’Boy!”Whitsellissaidtobetheonyholderofanhonest‐to‐goodness,genoowine,hand‐carvedGazinta.Indeed,hehimselfisconvincedthathenowpossesses

thegloriousestGazintainthewholedurnState.__________________________

ThismanuscriptwasdiscoveredundertenhistoricalstrataonOlveraStreetinLosAngelesbythathistermiteMilford“Panchito”Springer

ThegameofGazintaiscontemporarywiththecreationofthehumanrace.OurfirstClampatriarch,Adam,introducedthegametoEve.EvewashesitantatfirstbutbeingclamplayfulshebecameexpertatthedelightfulsportofGazintaandlaterconfessed that she always experienced a feeling of ecstasywhile indulging in thesport.

In theDiocletianeraGazintabecamesuchapopularpastime thatclamperssuffered from over exertion and were afflicted with Chorea, a nervous disordercharacterizedbyspasmodictwitchings.AndsoGazintaisresponsiblefortheoriginof a dance named after our Patron Saint Vitus because of the custom of dancingbeforetheimageofSaintVitusasameansofsecuringhisintercession.

Brother Dumbellicus was the only clamper who did not play Gazinta. TheEgyptians, Babylonians, and Greeks became devotees of the game—in fact, theGreekshadawordforit,butitlackseuphonysoIshallrelatetheLatinoriginofthewordGazinta. It isderivedfromtwoLatinwords.Thefirst is“gaza,”whichmeansfeminine treasure and the second in “intacta” which is interpreted as intact oruntouchedandsowehavethetwowords“gaza”and“intacta”contractedtoGazintawhich isapicturesquename for theclampacifyingandofficial sportofEClampusVitus.Clampershavealwaysbeenadventurersandtreasureseekers—eagertodelveintotheunknown.

DuringtheearlydaysinCaliforniatheMexicansdevelopedtheartofGazintatoatorriddegreeandtoencouragetheplayingofGazintathissymbolicapparatuswasdevisedbyclampotentclampers.*

ThelowerportionisthePhallicemblemandtheupperistheimageofVenus.TheobjectistoputVenusinflightandhavethePhallicemblempursueher.Thenatthe end of this graceful arc, if you are sufficiently skilled youwill accomplish theliaison!—andshout“Gazinta!”—yousee,theonegazintatheother.

Gazinta has always been the sport of kings and aesthetes who invariablyplayedthegameinprivate,butduringthegold‐rushdaysthenon‐conformistsmadea public exhibition of the contest and a poem was written commemorating thateventfulandclamprolificperiod.

Theminerscameinforty‐nine

Thescarlettrollopsinfifty‐oneAndfromthisunionnotdivineSprangtheornerynativeson. Anon.

*SeesymbolicdemonstrationofGazintaintheRotogravureSection,attheendofthisbook.(Ed.)

ANNALSOFTHENEWDISPENSATION

NOTE:Ourgentlereaderswillnowtranspose

thisnotableillustrationwiththatonp.87.

SincetheappearanceofTheCuriousBookofClampusmuchofsignificancehasoccurredtofindrecordintheAnnalsoftherebornEClampusVitus.TheValeofOphir, laCasadeDonRojerio,Panamint,OlveraStreet,Sutter’sFort,DeathValley,CampCadyandCalicohavealldrawntheirshareofclampilgrims.Now,therefore,itis meet that we of the latter day should present, preserve and protect inimperishable print the data from which future historians of our Ancient andHonorableOrderwilldrawtheir talesanent thesesolemnmoments in the livesoftheBrethren.*

Before proceeding with further details we are impelled to record withpardonablepridethepublicationofnolessthanthreenotablebooksfromthefacilpens of Brothers of the Order. We refer, of course, to those eminent andpraiseworthy best‐sellers: “Degrees of Damfoolishness,‐‐their Nature, Evaluation,Admeasurement and Care,” by Lee I. Stoppulovitch; “Some Associated Aspects ofAsininity,” by Samuel T. Farquarskey** and “HorrendousHumbugs I have known,and how to avoid them, by Harry Petersonoff. Newspapers in the Diggins pleasecopy.

_____________________

*Thenamesofthestrictlyanonymousauthorsofthesesprightlyaccountswillbefoundnotedatthecommencementofeacharticle.Needlesstosay,thesenamesmustforeverremainunknown,eventotheBrethren.**Asses, declares this noteworthy author, are of no less than five separate and distinct classes: (1) plain or ordinary; (2)consummate;(3)perfect;(4)egregious,and(5)equine(herelistedinascendingorder).Thisgreattruth,saysFarquarskey,istobegleanedfromcertainpassagescontainedinVolumeLXXXI,ChapterIII,PartIV,oftheunwrittenandunpublishedworksof our erudite Patron Vitus, where the entire subject is accorded obscure as well as exhaustive, not to say exhausting,treatment.

_____________________

“OPHIRHASFALLEN—BUTSTILLLIVES!”*_____________________

*BySclamperino.ItisrecordedthattheabovetitlebecametherallyingcryoftheOphiritesafterall‐consumingfiredestroyedherpristineglories,backinthesixties..

It was early in the month of June, 1935, that the members of the GrandConsistory of our Order, accompanied by a bountiful bevy of the plain, gardenvarietyofClampers(each,beitremembered,anofficer,andeachofequalindignitywith all his Brethren), foregathered from all theDinnins at the antique and long‐somnolent townofOphir, there tosound theHorrificHewgag; there topartakeofnever‐before‐not‐ever‐to‐be‐equalled ham, eggs and sausage from the generoushand of TiaRamona Lozano (Peace be to hermemory, for since that day she hasgone to the far but joyous land of all good sausage and enchiladamakers); therewith solemn rites to ordain Charlie Camp as the Order’s first, and only, VituscanMissionarytotheHeathenwhostillgrope inDarkness,andto investhimwiththerobesandpanoplyofthishighoffice;theretopresenttotheretiringN.G.H.,TomNorris,atokenintheformandshapeofafittinglyframedportrait;theretoinstallLeonOmnivorousWhitsellastheN.G.H.oftheGrandLodge,andtheretopulloffajoyousandsuccessfulhoaxontheworld’sstamp‐collectorsbyrunningtheClampusPonyExpress(fourmiles, fromOphirtoAuburn)andselling“covers”broadcasttothesuckersofPhilately.”*

_____________________*PageBrotherJessup!

At this Pilgrimage the Noble Grand Humbugs from all parts of the Diggins

gathered to consider and discuss the Order’s past and future, and to enjoy itspresent. The flourishing Lodges of the following localities were particularly wellrepresented:Pot‐bellySlough,Ladies’Canyon,Hen‐roostCamp,LousyRavine,Git‐up‐‘n‐git,OneEyeDiggins,PushCoachHill,WildcatBar,PetticoatGulch,Ants‐in‐his‐pants,GroundHog’sGlory,BogusThunder,Poorman’sHumbug,NiggerPiety,Blue‐bellyRavine,Loafer’sRetreat,SwellheadDiggins,CentipedeHollow,Seven‐by‐nine,GospelSwamp,GougeEye,Hell’sDelight,PukeRavine,Slap‐jackBar,Rat‐trapSlide,GeehosophatGulch,Damfool’sDraw,Hogswallow,Seven‐upRavine,PaintPotPoint,One House Town, Slumgullion, Dog Town, Whiskey Hill, Half‐‘n‐half, Jackass Hill,BrandyCity,PokerFlat,MormonCircle,ShirttailBendandSkunk’sMisery.

OneofthemostimportanteventswasthegreatLouseRace,theofficialrulesandregulationsforwhichfollow:

OwnersandbreedersofpetliceareherebynotifiedthattheofficialLouseRaceofEClampus

VituswillbeheldatAuburnduringtheClamperWhiskerinoCelebration,May30‐June2,1935.Furtherdetailsastotimeandplacewillbeannouncedlater.

Any Louse fanciermay enter the contest. It will be conducted in a strictly humanemannerwithoutharmto the lice.Anyonecaughtdoping,pinching,bitingorotherwiseartificially stimulatingtherunnerswillbedisqualified.Licearesensitive,affectionatecreatures,andbesideswedon’twantcomplaints from theS.P.C.A.Contestantswill enterone louseandoneonly.The committee servesnoticethatitcannotbeheldaccountableforescapedentries.

Theentryshallbelongtooneofthetwowell‐knownbreeds,PediculushumanusorP.vestimenticommonlyknownasthecootie.Anyofthevarietiesnowrecognizedbybreeders—suchasP.humanusgermanicusandP.h.Chineenismaybeentered.

Shrimps,crabs,sow‐bugs,chickenlice,fleas,etc.willpositivelynotbequalified.Each racing lousemust be providedwith a distinctive name such as Scam Squirrel, Clothes

Hanger, Back Biter, or Pants Rabbit. The officials of the arena will supply the colors to be used inidentifyingentrants.

Fightinglicemustbemuzzledandeachownerwillberesponsiblefortheconductofhisentry.Theracewillberuninheats,onheatedplatters,andtimewillbeallowedforthewinnersof

eachheattocooloffbeforecomingupforthefinals.Anappropriateprizewillbegiventotheownerofthevictoriouslouse,aswellascertificatesof

merittothewinnersofeachheat.FirearmsandkniveswillbeleftinchargeoftheDoorkeeperduringtheevents.MotionpicturerightswillbegrantedonlyuponapplicationtotheCommittee.Experiencehasshownthatliceproperlytrainedforthiseventwillstandamuchbetterchance

ofwinning.Theentryshouldalsobefedwellontheowner’spersonforseveraldays,thenstarved,ifpossible,fortwenty‐fourstodevelopspeed.

The assembled Clampers of the Grand Lodge joined with the embattledmembersofLordSholtoDouglasChapter,No.3,atnearbyAuburn,incelebratingthegold‐days anniversary of that notable diggings. And after three great days—andnights—atthehospitableHouseofLozano,allwereconvincedthatifOphireverdidfall—“Itstilllives.”

ELRANCHODEDONROJERIO*_____________________

*ByWhiffenpiffle.

“Tamalada! Tamalada!” Yo‐ho, festive Clampers, Señora Dalton is stirringhercelebratedSpanishStewinEnrique’sgoodoldcopperkettle,broughtaroundtheHorn in 1841 to try out tallow, later used for the earliest baths of the youthfulRojerio,andnowpotparexcellence fortheSeñora’sMagnificentMexicanMixtures.‘TisSeptember,1935,andtamalesareinthemaking.

Under the arbor the Brethren gather. And still they come. At last theprocessionstarts,‐‐aroundthehill,acrossthemesa,outtothestarkoldrockwherejustayearearliertheClampersdedicatedtheirfirstplaque“TotheMemoryoftheForgotten Miner,” and finally to the Druid’s Grove on the hilltop, where nervousPoorBlindCandidateswitness theceremoniouspassingof theStaffofRelief,withHughGordonastheesteemedPresidentofhisClass.

Shadows race across the mighty Cañon of the San Gabriel, the sun sets incolorfulsplendor,twilightdrapeshersensuoussinuositiesupontheearth,andtheassembledClamperssclamperdownthehillandoncemoregatherunderthearborat La Casa de Don Rojerio. Lights flicker on, tamales, enchiladas, frijoles, arrozespañol, tortillas, caballos, caballeros, conciudadanos, haciendados, Clampatoros,señoritas,‐‐Whoops!Andagain,Whoops!

And then the ceremonyof tapping the fruitful Sycamore!DonRojerio athisbest!Richredbloodfromthegeneroustreeflowinginseeminglyunendingcascade!Inebriating glory! Mounting voices! Tales of the old days! Song! Laughter! GoodFellowship! A Clamper night for fair! Solemnly, with unanimous acclaim, theBrethrenvoteitanannualevent.

“Tamalada!Tamalada!OntoDonRojerio’s!

THEGHOSTOFPANAMINT*_____________________

*ByDonRojeriohimself.

‘Twasnear the IdesofNovember in theyear4940ofourOrder’sgloriousErathattheGrandandNear‐GrandChiselers,singly,inpairs,andbytrios,cuttheirclasses and their jobs,packed theirbedrolls and theirdunnagebags, bought theirsardines and their flap‐jack flour and hied themselves Panamintward. The desertschooner of the Humbug from whose pen drip these winged words, after somecoaxing, prodding andpriming,was at lastmade ready, and ably assistedby SkipKemman and Chiseler Guy Giffen,we nosed out of town and headed for the sun‐swept sage. After some hours we spied the road to Dove Springs and shortlydiscovered amotley crew, painfully bandanna‐ed, camped right in ourway. Aftersome parley we finally recognized this as the Wheat‐Springer‐Olmstead‐Palmer‐CharlieAdamsgang,justpreparingtorollinforthenight.(LittledidIthenreckthat,before another midnight, bitter words would pass between me and said Adams,Landscapist,bygosh.)

HardlyhadRosyFingeredDawntintedtheOrbofHeavenwithherfairSaffronGlowerewewereoffoncemore,ourlittlefleetconsistingoftheflagship,theSantaMaria (de Wheatena), the Pinta (de Daltonio) and the Niña de Olmsteady).Filibustering alongwith a brisk tailwind andnot a little hot air,we set the helmhardavast—alsobelay,myheatiews—andboundedmerrilyoverthedessertwaves,pastInyokern,SaltCanyon,TronaandBallarat,untilatlastwemadesafeharboratCapeChrisWichs,whereSurpriseCanyonspewsoutitsdetritusintoanduponthevarmintedvaleofPanamint.Fromthenon“it’suphilltothetop,‘n’nofoolin’.”

We prepared to storm themountain, placingWheat in frontwhereMotherJohnson,theHarpyoftheHills,wouldfillhimwithbuckshotfirst,ifsheshouldtakeit into her head to attack us. We (editorially speaking) hauled Olmstead out ofseveral ditches, pushed ourselves over theworst stretches, stormed theNarrows,andunwoundoneofthemosttortuousroadsthattheLordAlmightyeverpermittedsinfulmantotravel,‐‐onlytofindthatNeillWilson,withhisfatherandtheartistandthephotographerhadpreceededus,andwerealreadyfondlyembracedinthearmsoftheghostofPanamintCity,intherarifiedairofthatgloriousspot,sohighaboveourusualmundaneencirclementsthatonlyanoverlyagedsteakishigher.*

As dusk fell the roar of gasoline motors filled the great pink amphitheaterabout us with soul‐rending echoes. Marshal Stimson, Hugh Gordon, and PhilJohnstonhove in fromSouthof the SierraMadre, andLeonWhitsell, LeeStopple,EdgarBennett,ChetWittingtonandOliverKehrleinblewupthecanyonfromWestoftheSierraNevada.AndwhenthecampfirelitwitheerieraystheoldruinoftheSurpriseCanyonLandandWaterCompany’serstwhileestablishment—built likeafort—nolessthantwenty‐sixmenandboysgazedat the flickering flames.WeputtheboystobederelongandpreparedfortheSacrifice.

Then was the Staff passed with éclat to Marshall Stimson, President of hisclassofP.B.C’s.,andthereaftertalltalesoftheelderdaysandmanyahair‐raising

storyofthepastfromthelipsofNeillWilsonlentcolortothescene.ItwasjustafterFairLuna rose to shineupon thevale thatCharlie and I clashed.All theothers, itappears, slept without (not blankets, to be sure, that freezing night, but withoutroofs to shelter theirheads), butmygangandCharliehad foundanold, desertedshack, and here we laid (or hung) our heads. All would have gone well had notCharlie sought to close the shutters of the sole and only window. Forgive me,Charlie,formyhotwordsandpregnanttemper;Oh,forgiveme,lad.

AndwiththemorntheStewartMinewasfound,andpooroldBobMcKinney’sgrave,lonerelicoftheburying‐groundofPanamint.WesprucedupdditsunkemptfeneandwanderedbacktotownwhiletheredoubtableNeilltoldusaboutit.Hurrythebook,Mr.Wilson,Iimploreyou.“TreasureExpress”hasgotusalla‐quiver,nottomentiona‐gog,andwelongimpatientlyforyourtalesofpristinePanamint.

Butlast,andbestofall,afteramotleythronghadstormedthesteepsaboutusand had gazed down upon the wild, rockbound home of “Hungry Bill” (alias“PanamintTom”)andtheplayasofDeathValley,weinstalledapurebronzeplaquetothememoryof“TheForgottenMiner”uponthegreat,erectedstackoftheStewartWonder Mill, with much accompanying oratory,‐‐and a tear or two from theassembledBrethren.

And then farewell! The northern Clampers first, then those of the southernvales.Asformyself,hadthebeanslasted,I’dhavebeenthereyet.Butalas,thelastcanbit thedust, andwewereoff,‐‐off for the landofmockeryandboredom,‐‐andpay‐checks.Ho‐hum!

Panamint, like Ophir, may have fallen, but she still lives. And if you don’tbelieveme,askNeillWilson.

THELOSTPLAQUEOFOLVERASTREET*_____________________

*By“Panchito,”SpringertheFirst.

OnFebruary 8, 1936, the Clampers‐in‐exilemobilized in the city towhichtheReverentFatherCrespiappliedthesonorousappellation:ElPueblodeNuestraSeñora,LaReinedeLosAngelesdePorciüncula.Withsuchanameas that, it’snowonder that its city limitsextend fromhitheron theeast toyonon thewest, andfromGogon thenorth toMagogon thesouth.Anyhow,at that timeandplace,alleyes,aswellas feet,wereturnedtowardOlveraStreet,mostcolorfulpaseoof thisphantasmagoricmetropolis,‐‐abitofold‐timeCaliforniashelteredfrommodernity.Since the street is closed to vehicular traffic,we parked our V‐8 carreta near thePlazaandsaunteredpasttheoldAvilaadobe,whereCommodoreStocktonissaidtohaveparkedhimselfprotemporeafterenteringthePueblowithhisGringoarmy.

InboothsalongthemiddleofthestreetwereMexicanclaytoys,black‐papercigarettes,hand‐dunkedcandles,earthenimages,glass,potteryandcacti,butmostsignificantofalltoConquistodorishClampers,thesymbolic“Gazintas.”Alongeithersidewepassed intriguingramadas,wherebeforebrickovens, traditionally‐garbedMexicanwomenmoulded tortillas and ladledout frijoles to theirguests.At the farend of the one‐block street, at an open‐air forge, mementos of Old Mexico werebeing wrought in white‐hot iron by a fierce‐mustachioed but soft‐voiced smith.‘TwasanidealplaceforaClampowwow!

Morethantwo‐scoreClamperssoonforegatheredintheSaladeFiestaoftheCafé la Golondrina—an ancient bodega—where our gracious hostess, SeñoraConsuelodeBonzo,paid titanic tribute toourmoreor lessancientandhonorableOrder.Amidenchiladasmuycaliente, blushinglybeautifulMexicangirls in colorfulChina‐Poblana costumes, and song‐provoking music from guitars and mandolins,manyoftheBrethrenwerechristenedinthetraditionalmannerbytheSeñora,whogleefully broke confetti‐stuffed eggshells over their bald, near‐bald and ri‐baldcrania. Iemerged fromthisceremonywith themoniker “Panchito,”but feltamplycompensatedformyordealandtheresultantjestsandgesticulationsofmybrotherClampersbytheonegreat,tropical,consumingcaressbestoweduponmeduringthecourseofthissymbolicbaptismbythelovelySeñoritawhodidtheegg‐laying,asitwere.

AfterthefeasttheClampersmigratedtotheantiquatedAviladobe,where,intheold‐timepatio,aclassofP.B.C’s.,headedbyDavidFaries,wereexorcisedandimmolated,andoursonorousRitual,recentlyrevisedandpurifiedbytheRoisterousIscutis,“dazzled”theearsofallthebeholders.Wheneachmemberoftheassembledcrew had given the sign of the healthy hybrid to the entire satisfaction of theBrethren,wemeandered to theother sideof the courtyard for a bombastic, roof‐raising dedicatory address by N. G. H. Dalton and the unveiling of an infamousbronzeplaquebyG.H.H.Kirkwood.

Why is the plaque called infamous? Because, dear little children, within afortnightafterourconclavesomelight‐fingeredmaniac(sexunknown)causeditto

vanishfromitswhollyappropriatesettinguponthewalloftheprimordialprivy,notsixpacesfromthereardooroftheadobe.Inotherwords,swipedit.

SpecialAgentWheatcroftreportedthedisappearancetoInspectorGroningeroftheSouthwestUnmounted.whomadethisrapiddeduction:

“On this plaque, which was fastened to the wall of that fine old outhouse,erected longbefore theSpecialistEra,were thesewords, ‘InMemoryofForgottenHours of Meditation.’ No doubt some plaquophile is at large in this community.PossiblyheispreparingtoaffixtheplaquetothetoweroftheCityHall.”

Andthere,myconfreres,danglesthetale,notofourpatronanimal,butofthelostplaqueofOlveraStreet.

ON,SUCKERS,ONTONEWHELVETIA!*_____________________

*BytheCapitolDoctor,ofttimesycleptClark.

Amilling crowd of angels surged about the Bolden Bar of Heaven. Somedrank ambrosia, some argued in subdued tones. An air of antipication (sic), ofsuppresseddesire,wasnoticeable.The21st of February, 1936,had justbeen tornfrom the calendar. For some time it had been dull as hell in heaven. Now, oneGuardianAngelwasbeingdetailedtoearth.Allhadvolunteeredfortheservice,eachhad advanced her qualifications. Suddenly it was deathly quiet. Jehovah himselfappeared,saying,“it isnotstrangethatyouallshouldwishtogotoCalifornia.Butone only can be spared. The little lady who had the California beat in 1849 willpleasestepforward.”

Asun‐tannedblondesprangtoherfeet.“Thisisamissionofgraveresponsibility,mydear.YouwillbeinNewHelvetia

byfivethisafternoon;betterbetherebynoon.Youknowthelayoftheland.Ninetyyearshavewroughtgreatchangeintheroads,butyouwillknowthem.Sandwichedamongthetrucksyouwillfindmanycarloadsofmenfilledwiththespiritof1849.Thesemenwillbehurryingto theFortof JohannSutter.Guardthemwell.Protectthem.Iknowhowgreatlytheyneeddivineprotection.FortherelivesintheFortofJohann Sutter a lineal descendant of Ananias. Watch him! Report at high noontomorrow.Begone!”

Califia,forsuchwashername,orderedoutacloud.ShewaschagrinedtofindthatallthebigcloudshadalreadybeensenttoSouthernCalifornia.Butasmallonewouldbesatisfactoryforsoshortatrip,andselectingatinywhiteoneshewassoonoff,floatingalongtheMilkyWay.

Athigh twelveofFebruary23rd,awornout,discouraged,buthighlyexcitedCalifiashotthruthePearlyGatesandwasquicklytakenbeforeJehovah.

Humblyshestruckafewharpnotesandreported,“I’vespentthenightwiththeClampers”andfellinaswoonathisfeet.Alittlenectarwaspouredbetweenherlips;herframeshook;herbosomheaved;shesatupandwhisperedhuskily:

“Now,listen,here’smystoryandI’mgoingtosticktoit.FirstIrepairedtotheappointed spot and foundall carsheading for aplace calledMorven. Car after carunloadeditsquota.Halfahundredmenentered,‐‐amotleythrong.Somehadaboutthemthefreshcleansmellof theSierra,otherstheodorofthecowpasturesofLaReina de Los Angeles. These latter seemed so happy, so carefree and innocent. Ithoughtthemreturningfromanexile.Itseemednoplaceforme,dearGod,butIgotclose enough to hear a great gurgling, a smacking ofmany lips. I thoughtmyselfdiscoveredwhenIheardthemsingingpraisesoftheproductoftheAngel’sTit.AndIshivered with fear when a man telephoned the Master of Morven and said theSacramentoBeewantedastoryofthesceneforitsnextedition.

Promptly at six they roared away to thewestward. I followed them onmycloud. Soon all were at the Fort of Johann Sutter. At the gate stood an armedwatchman,scanningeachpassportintheflickerofabull’seyelantern.Irecognized

himasanacquaintanceofmyoldbeat.Insidewasabanquet.Onthetablewerebeef,beans,cornbread, justsuchasIsawJohnHenryBrownprepareforCaptainSutterninetyyearsago.ThosemenfromsouthoftheTehachapimustnothaveeatenforaweek.

Followed much oratory from Leonidas Whitsell, whom they called NobleGrandHumbug, and from TomNorris and Roger Dalton. They also seemed to beHumbugs.AdamLeeMoore,whowasbornjustbeforeIwastakenofftheCaliforniabeatin1850,playedthefiddle.Healsosang.(Thepoorangelblushed).DoctorBarrpaid a glowing tribute to good old Bill Meek, our newly arrived brother on yourright; Earl Burke talked 5000 years on history; Lindley Bynum and George Danemade reportson something (Dane’swas clean).Theworld’soldest game,Gazinta,was explained by an obvious expert and past‐master, “Panchito” Springer. Hislearneddiscoursebrought reminiscentexpressions tomany faces.He, itwas,whopresented to Leonidas Whitsell the only hand carved Gazinta in existence. TheceremoniesofinitiationwereperformedbyCarlIgnatiusWheatandtherestoftherecking(sic) crew from the cow pastures. Lord, do not askme for details. DoctorPorter of the Bay Regions had himself elected president of his class,‐‐an idealcandidate.Irecommendhimtoyouforfutureinitiationhere,ifheshouldmakethegrade.AswarthySouthernerandacurly‐hairedSwedethenprovedthatwildoatswillgrowinwhitehair,ifpartedinthemiddle.Thefinalecamewiththeunveiling,by LeonWhitsell, of a plaque marking the spot where Jim Marshall exhibited toSutterhis flakeofgold. In thepouringrain theNobleGrandHumbugunveiledtheplaquewithmanygracefulandappropriategestures.Buthe left it leaningagainsttheadobewall,thefourscrewsnecessarytofastenittothedoorintheproperplacebeing just fourmore thanhehad left.Then,OhLord, their5,941stannualbanquetbrokeupandtheydisappearedtothefourwinds.”

CalifiawaswarmlycommendedforherthoroughreportandherguardianshipoftheClampers,whereuponsheburstintotearsandhystericalsobbing.

“But,God, I failed. I failedmiserably. Iwasdeceived,‐‐andbyaClamper,‐‐bythatoldwretchHarryC.Peterson,wholivesattheFortofJohannSutter.HemustbethelinealdescendantofAnanias,aboutwhomyouwarnedme.Hewasnotbilledonthe program. TheNobleGrandHumbug simply declared thatHarry Petersonwasgoing to make an important Historical Announcement. This man, apparently sosimple,soguileless,brieflytoldthestoryoftheBearFlagAffair.Welldoyouknowthetale.AftergettingtheFlagraisedatSonoma,thatsleepyJunemorningin1846,andaftertheVallejosandVictorPrudonhadbeenimprisoned(intheveryroominwhichhewasnowspeaking), thisMunchausenquickly changed the scene toPaloAlto on that April morning in 1906 when you gave the terrible lesson to SanFrancisco.Hetoldofhisbedshaking,andthefurniturecomingacrosstheroom.HesprangfromthebedandrushedtotheStanfordMuseum.Therelicsthereweresafe.Hebethoughthimselfofhissister,inthefire.Hisbrotherownedoneofthefourcarsin Palo Alto. They stopped at two drug stores for bandages and other first‐aidsupplies,atadepartmentstoreforblankets.Thesetheycarriedwiththem,thefirstsuch taken into the stricken city. At Fourth Street they were stopped by Federaltroops.Noonecouldcrossthatline.PetersonknewLieutenantLowsley.HebeggedforonelastlookinPioneer’sHall.TheLieutenantagreedtolooktheotherwaybut

warnedthatthebuildingmustsoonbeblowntobitsandthathemustleaveonthecommand.Wildlyhe rushed into thebuilding,past theMastodon, tears streamingdown his cheeks as he took a last look at those priceless relics, doomed todestruction.Amanbrushedbyhisarm. Itwasasoldier ladenwithdynamite.Thecommandtoevacuaterangout.Thefuseshadbeenlighted.Ashefledthebuildinghereachedintoashowcasetotteringtothefloor,andseizedaragwhichhestuffedbeneathhiscoat.Reachinghisbrother’scarhehiditundertheseat,andproceededtoforgetit.Sixweekslater,whenhelpingthebrothercleanthecar,herediscoveredthe rag. It would be useful in the cleaning. Opening it up he gazed a moment interror, then hid it away in thewoodshed,where it lay for fifteen years before hemovedittoamoresecureplace.Throughthirtylongyearsthisthingpreyedonhismind.At lasthecouldstanditnolonger.Heconfessed,toaSacramentophysician,who convinced him that he was safe from prosecution, because of the statute oflimitations; that the institutionofNewHelvetiaChapterofEClampusVitusmadethisthemostimportanteveninginthehistoryofSacramentosinceMarshallcameinwith his gold; and finally, that the men there assembled were real lovers ofCalifornia and her romantic history. In consideration of all this, he produced apackage,wrapped inaSanFrancisconewspaperof1906.From ithe tookadustyrag,shookoutcloudsofdust,andunfurledtheBearFlag.Astheflagwasrunupthepole,cheersrenttheroof.Handswereclappedtill theyhurt.Backswerethumpedandpounded.Petersonwaslaudedtotheskies.ItwassuggestedbymanythathebemadepermanentGrandHonoraryHumbug.Pandemoniumreignedsupreme.Aftertenminutesofhysteria theNobleGrandHumbugwasremindedofhispromise toaskforfurtherproof.Hethatasksshallreceive.Petersonfurnishedtheproof.Hedidnot need to prove the Fort, for they were sitting in the very room in which theVallejosandPrudonwereimprisoned.Hehadstatedthemountainmen“forded”theriver,andasproofheexhibitedthesteeringwheelofanoldFord.Hehadstatedthatthe men rode to Sonoma on horseback, and he passed around neat cellophane‐wrappedpackagescontainingtheproof,wellpreserved.Hehadtoldofthedifficultyof getting the men started for Sonoma, not wishing to leave their squawsunprotected.Andhepassedaroundlittlebagsofsandwithwhichthesquawswereprovided, and demonstrated the technique. On the approach of a man, if sheperceived that hewas a Clamper, she immediately sanded herself generously. HeprovedtheSanFranciscofirewithacanofpickledashes;thathewasinPioneer’sHall with the jawbone of the Mastodon, coyote size, explaining that it had beensteadily shrinking through theyears.Andas finalproofhe exhibitedaparchmentdocument swearing to the accuracy and honesty of all his statements and all hisexhibits, signed on the 14th of June, 1846, by Johann Sutter, JamesMarshall, JohnFrémont,KitCarson,RobertSemple,WilliamB.IdeandMarianoG.Vallejo.”

Jehovahsatindeepthought,whileCalifiakneltwithdowncasteyes.FinallyHesmiledandsaid, “RiseCalifia,andbeofgoodcheer. Istillcommendyoufora taskwelldone.I,myself,believedthatoldson‐of‐a‐gunwhilehewastellinghisstory.”

THEPHANTOMPHRATEROFPHURNACEKREEK*_____________________

*ByPanamintPete.

YourofficialexpeditionformedtotracethetracksleftbyourlatelamentedandesteemedClampatriarchWilliamLewisManlyduringhistourthroughthegreatdepression**in1849and1850,leftLosAngelesonApril4,1936,returningacrosstheMojaveintimetocatchtheBrethrenatCampCadyonthe11th.Manly,itappears,wasthefirstreal,honest‐to‐goodnesstouristofthisregion;henotonlypaiditone(involuntary) visit, but after he got out he turned right around and came back(voluntarily)formore.Thanwhichtherecanbelittlewhicher.

**ByWhenIsayDepression,ImeanDepression,notthelittleeconomicdimpleyouguysofthenineteen‐thirties

thinkofwhenyouhearthatfearsomeword.Well,mydearfriends,aftermuchtribulationandsomeverysandyeggsand

bacon, Ihavethehonortoreport that thetracksof themightyN.G.H.ofFurnaceCreekwerehappilydiscoveredbyyourexplorersonenight, during thegraveyardshift,uponaheadstone,hardby theCoffinMineonSkeletonRidge in theFuneralMountainsofDeathValley,atapointoverlookingtheDevil’sGolfCourse, justone‐halfmile fromHell and fourhundredand sixty‐sevenmiles fromNowhere. If youdon’tbelieveit,goseeforyourself.WerecommendthemonthsofJunetoSeptemberforthis.

Not onlywere these tracksdiscovered, but highupon the rugged ridges ofthePanamintstherewasfoundabeautifulsetofgoldteeth, left thereasasignbythe D. F. D. of the Lodge, who passed that way as guide and mentor for theJayhawkerParty.And,aswewerestumblingourwaythroughthesand,oneoftheboyskickedata smallpieceof ironand found it tobeattached toaburied fryingpan,‐‐indubitablytheveryskilletonwhichtheredoubtable JulietBriercookedherlast flapjack that none‐to‐happyNewYear’sDay in 1850.Next to itwe found thewhitenedjawboneofawildass,ampleevidencethatClampershadoncefrequentedthespot.Thesemementoeswebroughthomeassouvenirs..

Yes, indeedy,thetripwasasuccess.Andtoshowthatourheartsare intherightplaceweintendtoreturnassoonascoolweathercomesagaintothedesert,thereto findtheGunsightLodeorbust*andweshallgladlypasstheStaff tosuchPoorBlind candidatesaswemaydiscoverhidingbeneath themesquitebushesatBennett’sWell.

*Usuallywebust.

CAMPCADYANDCALICO*_____________________

*ByNavajoPhilJohnston

Ghosts of the past were marching and countermarching across the oldparade ground at Camp Cady,when, on April 11, 1936, a contingent of Clampersarrived at the ruined military post in the desert. This locale was ideas for apilgrimage,sinceitsromanticstoryhasalmostbeenlost,anditsveryexistenceisallbutforgottenbythesimplefolkofSouthernCalifornia.CampCadywasacenterofmilitaryoperationsinoneofthemostlonelyanddesolatesectionsofthesouthwest.OnthesouthflowedtheMojaveRiver,ameretrickleofwaterscreenedbyadensegrowthofwillowsandmesquite—andthiswastheonlyverdureforleaguesineverydirection.

ItwasinMay,1860,thatMajorJamesH.CarletonwithadetachmentofFirstDragoonsfromFortTejonwanderedoutintotheMojaveDesertunderordersfromtheWarDepartment to chastisemarauding Indians and to establish a permanentgarrisontoprotecttravelers.ThisassignmentwascarriedoutwithathoroughnessanddispatchcharacteristicofthemanwholaterbecamemilitarygovernorofNewMexico.ThePiuteswerequicklybroughttoterms,andasitewasselectedforafortnearthejunctionoftheroutestoSantaFeandSaltLakeCity.

During the ten years that followed, troops were constantly patrolling thedesert.Abrief interruptionof this surveillanceoccurredwhen, inApril, 1866, theWarDepartmentorderedthepost’sabandonment.ResidentsofSouthernCaliforniabecame highly incensed, and protested so strongly that the authorities werevirtuallyforcedtoorderthefortreoccupiedshortlyafterward.Scarcelymorethantwomonths elapsedafter the soldiershadbeen returned toCampCady,whenanincidentoccurred that showed theirneed in that locality, for inanambush fiveofthe troopers were killed in a brief but furious battle,‐‐the most serious reversesufferedbyFederalarmsintheMojaveDesert.

Afterviewingtheruinsoftheoldcamp,theClampershiedthemselvestotheCalico Mountains, cleft with spectacular gorges and spotted with geologicformationswhoseweirdcolorshavesuggested theunusualname.Threading theirwas through Mule Canyon and Odessa Canyon, new but little‐frequented roadsmadeaccessibletothemthemostremarkabledesertsceneryinSouthernCalifornia,whileoldminetunnelsandshaftsyawnedatthetravelersfromeveryside,forthesemountainsyieldedavasttreasureinsilverhalfacenturyago!

ThefinaldestinationwastheghostlytownofCalico.Discoveredin1881byJohnMcBrydeandLowerySilver, thisdistrictprovedtobesorich thatahordeofminers,prospectors,boomersandmiscellaneousgentrystampededtotheareaandswelledthenewtown’spopulationtomorethanthreethousandinashorttime.Forseven years Calico prospered on silver, and the discovery of colemanite (sodiumborate,whichwasnotknowntoexistbeforethattime)wasamajorevent,destinedtomakeofCalicothechiefproductioncenterofboraxformanyyears.

Eventually, when the largest silver deposits had been exhausted, andcolemanitehadbeendiscoveredingreaterquantityintheFuneralMountainseastof

DeathValley,thecampenteredaperiodofdecline,whichcontinueduntilitbecameaghosttown.

WhentheClampersenteredCalico,theyfoundonlythreeorfourpermanentresidentsinwhatwasoncethemetropolisoftheMojaveDesert.Successivefireshadrazedvirtuallyallofthewoodenbuildings,butthefewstoneandadobestructuresstill remaining testified to the town’sone‐time importance.Hugedumpsofwaste,gapingshaftsandtunnels,andalongdepositoftailingsbelowtheoldmill‐sitewereeloquent of the riches that had been taken from those highly coloredmountains,estimatesofwhichbythosewhoshouldknowranashighaseightymillionsdollars.

Camped on a vacant area between two venerable buildings, the Clamperswere visited by Bob Greer, only surviving miner who participated in the“excitement”duringCalico’sheyday.Bobdelightedandintriguedwithseveraltalesof the old camp when she was going strong. One of the best recalled a certainpreacher,whoseheadquarterswasasmall townnear thecoast.Hewent toCalicooccasionally to conduct services, and there made the acquaintance of a localpromoter known as “the Colonel.” When this acquaintance had ripened intofriendship,theColonelpersuadedthemanofGodtobuyaminingclaimfromhim,which,healleged,wasrich insilverore.Asamatterof fact, itcontainednosilver,but in its veinswas colemanite,which the Colonel then believed to beworthless.Withimplicittrusttheparsonpaid$300fortheproperty,andreceivedadeed.

Eventually, the colemanite was identified as a valuable mineral, and theColonelregrettedhissale.Hurryingtothepreacherbeforethelattercouldhearthenews,heconfessedthat theclaimhadbeenmisrepresented—therewasn’tabitofsilver in thewholeproperty.Nowhewas conscience‐stricken, and eager tomakeamends.Wouldhisbelovedbrother inChristacceptasrestitutionthefullpricehehadpaidforthemine,andreturnthedeed?

Greatlymoved by this exhibition of righteous generosity and remorse, thepreacheracceptedtherefundandthenkneltwiththeColoneltothankGodthathisfriendhadrepentedofhiswrong‐doing.Immediatelyafterward,theColonelfoundaman who was buying borax claims, and sold him one for twenty‐five hundreddollars!

TheClampersthenadjournedtotheirinitiation,inaruinedstructureunderashelving rock, once appropriately called “the Hyena’s Den.” Here Bob Greer wassolemnly installed as a Grand Honorary Humbug, and Banker Johnstone of SanDimas received the ennobling Staff from a Clamper who in real life sorts thebanker’smoneyatthebank.Ho‐hum!Howtopsy‐turvyisthisworld!*

*PhilhasneglectedtotellthetaleofthelearnedVanDyke,JusticeofthePeace,MojavePioneer,andownerofthe

VanDykeRanchatDaggett.Withallsolemnity“theJudge”wasbroughttoCalico,andsatwiththecompanylisteningtoBobGreer’s tales.Butwhenadjournmentwas taken to theHyena’sDen theoldcodgerwasnowhere tobe found.Phil searchedexcitedlyabout the town.No Judge!The initiationwenton.Morpheuswassoughtby tiredClampers.At last, agaunt figureappearedamidtheshadows;itwas“theJudge.”Madesleepybythetalesofelderdays,hehadsoughtsolaceonaricketyporchnearby,andmissedtheentireshow.

Thereitis,friendsoftheradioworld,thatPlatrixChapterwascheatedoutofanotherGrandHonoraryHumbug.Thus end the annals down to date. May future historians find crumbs of

delightamongthisfloodofwords.Whoknowswhatwonderstorelateanotheryearwillbring?

THEANCIENTANDHONORABLE

ORDERECLAMPUSVITUS

CEREMONYANDRITUALOFINITIATION

Thetrue,authenticandclampotentRitualof Initiation,carefullycompiled,ceremoniously corrected, prayerfully purged of both egregious error and hatefulheterodoxy,andnowdonedamveritablyanewbyBrotherIscutis,theoneandonlyholderoftheLeatherMedal,andVisitadorGeneraloftheOrder,beforeandaftertheFullMoon,inthis,thefivethousandninehundredandforty‐firstyearofthegloriousandclampregnanteraofECLAMPUSVITUS.

Nihilobstat…………………………………..G.N.R. Imprimatur……………………….………….N.G.H. Sedprimeviduaribus………..……………G.I.H.

Prolegomena

At the sound of the Hewgag the brethren will assemble in the Hall ofComparativeOvations. The initiatory officials and other officerswill assume theirtraditionalposts,asfollows:

At the head of the Chamberwill stand theNoble GrandHumbug,with theempty chair of the Clampatriarch uponhis right hand and the empty chair of theGrandNobleRecorderuponhislefthand.

HalfwaydowntheleftsideoftheChamberwillappeartheemptychairoftheRoyalPlatrix.

HalfwaydowntherightsideoftheChamberwillappeartheemptychairoftheRoisterousIscutis.

Some six to ten feet in front of the portal, directly opposite and facing theNoble Grand Humbug, will appear the empty chair of the Grand ImperturbableHangman.

At either side of the portal (at the far end of the Chamber from theNobleGrandHumbug) the twoDamfoolDoorkeeperswill assume their respectiveposts,the portal itself being closed. D.F.D. No. 1 will shoulder the Blunderbusket, andD.F.D.No.2willleanupontheSwordofMercyTemperedwithJustice.

The Clampatriarch, the Grand Noble Recorder, the Royal Platrix, theRoisterous Iscutis, the Grand Imperturbable Hangman, the Clamps Matrix, theClamps Petrix and the Clamps Vitrix will attend without the portal, clad in theirofficialpanoply,bearingtheClampedimentsoftheirrespectiveoffices,*andhavingintheircustodythemiserablebodyofthePoorBlindCandidate.

The remaining multitude of Clampers will assume such posts about theChamberasmaybedirectedbytheNobleGrandHumbug.

Thebrethrenwillmaintainallproperdecorum.Whenallisready,thelightswillbeloweredandduesolemnitywillstalkabouttheHall.

TheOrderofInitiation

N.G.H.—LettherebeorderintheHallofComparativeOvationsofEClampusVitus…

*TheClampatriarchwillleanupontheRoyalStaffofRelief;theGrandNobleRecorderwillbeartheGreatCharteroftheOrder;theRoisterousIscutiswillholdtheClampificatedCowbell;theClampsMatrixwillbeartheCorruscatedCandelabrum,minifiedwithlightedcandles,andtheClampsPetrixandClampsVitrixwilleachbearlightedcandlesintheirrighthands.(Oh, so sorry! Excuse please!Wind has just blown the rest of Ritual outwindow.Printer,please leaveblankpageor twoforBrothersandWidowstowrite inwhattheycanremember,ifany,ofInitiationofpoorBlindcandidate.Iwringmyhandsinsorrow,andofferthewell‐knownsignalofDistress.Ed.)

ECLAMPUSVITUSGRANDCLAMPROSTER

VeneratedPastClampatriarchsMajorHoraceBell,lateoftheQueenoftheCowCounties.JohnHenryBrown,lateofYerbaBuena.SamuelClemons,lateofJackassHill.AlonzoDelano,lateofGrassValley.GeorgeHoratioDerby,aliasJohnPhoenix,aliasJohnP.Squibob,lateofSandyAgo.WilliamLewisManly,lateofFurnaceCreek.JamesWilsonMarshall,lateofColoma.WilliamBullMeek,lateofClamptonville.Karl Friedrich Hieronymous, Freiherr von Munchhausen, late of Hanover,

Deutschland.GeorgeN.Napoleon,lateofColumbia.NortontheFirst,EmperoroftheUnitedStatesandProtectorofMexico,lateofYerba

Buena.CountGansonRaouldeRaousset‐Boulbon,lateofHermosillo.JohanAugustSutter,lateofNewHelvetia.MarianoGuadelupeVallejo,lateofSonoma.GrandConsistoryAdamLeeMoore,GrandClampatriarch,151821stAve.,SanFrancisco.AlfredR.Kirkwood,GrandViceClampatriarch,1143E.HowardSt.,Pasadena.JohnMcSorley,GrandHonoraryHumbug,MokelumneHill.RobertGreer,GrandHonoraryHumbug,Yermo.Dr.J.H.Barr,GrandHonoraryHumbug,YubaCity.LeonO.Whitsell,exofficio,NobleGrandHumbug,StateBldg.,SanFrancisco.G.EzraDane,exofficio,GrandNobleRecorder,BalfourBldg.,SanFrancisco.DonRojeriodeDaltonyZamorano,exofficio,RoyalPlatrix,Azusa.CarlI.Wheat,VisitadorGeneral,416CityHall,LosAngeles.CharlesL.Camp.VituscanMissionary,GobiDesert,OuterMongolia,China.CapitulusRedivivus,No.1,YerbaBuenaAnselE.Adams,P.B.C.,13124thAve.,SanFrancisco.EdgarBennett,J.K.L.,BroadwayBldg.,Oakland.HerbertEugeneBolton,R.G.H.,BancroftLibrary,U.C.,Berkeley.LouisJ.Breuner,J.Q.S.,2199Broadway,Oakland.EarlBurke,C.M.,2540WakefieldAve.,Oakland.Chas.L.Camp,R.A.,V.M.,Dept.ofPaleontology,U.C.,Berkeley.RoscoeL.Clark,R.K.G.S.,ForumBldg.,Sacramento.FrederickC.Cordes,V.G.C.,384PostSt.,SanFrancisco.

Wm.H.Culbert,N.G.C.,Wells‐FargoBank,14MontgomerySt.,SanFrancisco.CharlesP.Cutten,N.G.P.,780EuclidSt,SanFrancisco.G.EzraDane,G.N.R.,1400BalfourBldg.,SanFrancisco.GeorgeE.Dawson,P.B.C.,14MontgomerySt.,SanFrancisco.AlphonseM.Duperu,D.F.D.,200Broadway,SanFrancisco.HerbertM.Evans,V.G.S.,810SpruceSt.Berkeley.FrancisP.Farquhar,G.I.MillsTower,SanFrancisco.SamT.Farquhar,C.M.,U.C.Press,Berkeley.WalterA.Folger,C.P.140NewMontgomerySt.SanFrancisco.HaroldB.Forsterer,V.R.P.,TribuneBldg.,Oakland.EdwinGrabhorn,R.C.M.,642CommercialSt.,SanFrancisco.GeorgeW.Hallock,P.B.C.,Alleghany.HaroldC.Holmes,V.G.I.,320PershingDr.Oakland.EdgarB.Jessup.C.V.,1475PowellSt.,Oakland.EdgarM.Kahn,V.C.M.,482CaliforniaSt.,SanFrancisco.OliverKehrein,M.N.O.,8969ClaySt.,SanFrancisco.LawtonR.Kennedy,Clampastor,242FrontSt.,SanFrancisco.EdmundG.Kinyon,R.I.,Editor,MorningUnion,GrassValley,Calif.Geo.D..Lyman,G,S.,384PostSt.,SanFrancisco.Wm.T.McSorley,G.N.H.,221SanCarlos,Oakland.AdamLeeMoore,G.C.,151821stAve.,SanFrancisco.Thos.W.Norris,X.N.G.H.,Livermore,Calif.DonaldPatterson,P.B.C.,2608WarringSt.,Berkeley.Wm.S.Porter,D.A.,3141WebsterSt.,Oakland.HarryNoyesPratt,P.B.C.,HagginMemorialGallery,Stockton.MiltonH.Shutes,V.R.C.,WakefieldBldg.,Oakland.Jas.D.Stewart,G?.C.,Auburn,Calif.LeeL.Stopple,R.G.H.,642RussBldg.,SanFrancisco.FletcherB.Taylor,G.S.,40029thSt.Oakland.ArthurW.Towne,R.C.,411stSt.,SanFrancisco.Chas.L.Watson,V.G.H.,101SanPablo,SanFrancisco.DouglasS.Watson,X.N.G.H.,2005TassoSt.,PaloAlto.CarlI.Wheat,N.G.H.Emeritus,416CityHall,LosAngeles.LeonO.Whitsell,N.G.H.,Calif.R.R.Comm.,StateBldg.,SanFrancisco.ChesterWittington,X.Y.Z.,20SecondSt.,SanFrancisco.GeraldW.Wickland,V.C.M.,14MontgomerySt.,SanFrancisco.NeillC.Wilson,D.F.D.,No.2,ClausSprecklesBldg.,SanFrancisco.WalterJ.Wilson,R.I.P.,BroadwayBldg.,Oakland.CapitulusPlatrixi­in­Exilio,No.2,QueenoftheCowCountiesCharlesGibbsAdams,L.G.,919PalmAve.,So.Pasadena.CharlesK.Adams,G.I.,560So.MainSt.,LosAngeles.ReginaldBalmer,D.F.D.,2079W.SilverLakeBlvd.,LosAngeles.CharlesBauder,P.O.,310StateBldg.,LosAngeles.RolandBaughman,F.E.E.,784S.ElMolino,Pasadena.

A.GaylordBeaman,V.G.S.,2284MorenoDr.,LosAngeles.GarnerA.Beckett,G.C.E.,621S.HopeSt.,LosAngeles.GeorgeBettin,D.F.D.,Glendora.CharlesF.Blackstock,R.O.,Oxnard.LeslieE.Bliss,C.M.,%HuntingtonLibrary,SanMarino.LindleyBynum,C.P.,%HuntingtonLibrary,SanMarino.RobertG.Cleland,V.G.S.,%OccidentalCollege,LosAngeles.JohnClymer,R.C.211519thSt.,Bakersfield.RobertE.Cowan,X.R.P.,2403W.22ndSt.,LosAngeles.AveryCraven,R.P.,%HuntingtonLibrary,SanMarino.HomerD.Crotty,R.G.H.,634S.SpringSt.,LosAngeles.RogerP.Dalton,N.G.H.,Azusa.E.B.Degenkolb,C.V.,1138ValenciaWay,Arcadia.LindleyEberstadt,F.C.,55W.42ndSt.,NewYorkCity.FredC.Ebert,E.V.,1710Ramona,So.Pasadena.WilliamVanV.Ewert,L.L.,2121PalmAve.,Bakersfield.DavidR.Faries,D.F.L.,1275Subway‐TerminalBldg.,LosAngeles.SamuelM.Fischer,V.C.P.,Covina.LeoJ.Friis,G.H.H.400N.James,Anaheim.GuyJ.Giffen,P.O.X.,SanDimas.StanleyE.Goode,F.A.D.,1309SpurgeonSt.,SantaAna.BobGreer,G.H.H.,Yermo.HughGordon,D.F.D.,3121MontereyRd.,SanMarino.C.E.Groninger,R.I.,Glendora.PhilT.Hanna,G.H.,2601S.FigueroaSt.,LosAngeles.OsgoodHardy,F.O.B.,%OccidentalCollege,LosAngeles.FrancisHay,G.N.R.2601N.ChevyChase,Glendale.MaxE.Hayward,G.F.,410S.SanFernandoRd.,LosAngeles.VirgilB.Heitzel,L.F.C.,%HuntingtonLibrary,SanMarino.E.M.Henderson,G.D.P.,R.F.D.No.2,Puente,Calif.JudgeEdwardHenderson,D.A.R.,Ventura.DonHill,I.T.,233S.AlmontDr.,BeverlyHills.Dr.FrederickWebbHodge,G.S.,%SouthwestMuseum,MuseumDr.,LosAngeles.S.M.Jarnagin,P.I.109W.FremontPl.,LosAngeles.DanaH.Jones,C.C.C.,1206MapleAve.,LosAngeles.PhilipJohnston,G.C.S.,2335NorwalkAve.,LosAngeles.W.A.Johnstone,G.O.M.,SanDimas.ArthurKemman,G.N.G.,205S.Broadway,LosAngeles.ElmerR.King,G.L.%FremontHighSchool,LosAngeles.AlfredR.Kirkwood,G.H.H.,1143HowardSt.,Pasadena.RayJ.Lann,R.I.P.,Azusa.FinleyB.Laverty,G.E.,521CivicCenterBldg.,LosAngeles.J.GreggLayne,X.N.G.H.,1016SelbyAve.,LosAngeles.BertLucky,G.D.,Azusa.EdwardD.Lyman,G.G.,727W.7thSt.,LosAngeles.C.F.Manson,F.A.T.,2004Primrose,So.Pasadena.

A.B.McCallister,P.T.O.1818N.KenmoreAve.,LosAngeles.Wm.V.Mendenhall,D.F.D.,FederalBldg.,LosAngeles.R.C.Merriam,D.O.,R.F.D.No.2,Puente.ClarenceF.Miller,S.Q.,224E.Orange,Monrovia.DanB.Miner,G.A.T.,593N.Wilcox,LosAngeles.L.W.O’Brien,G.N.,252ElNidoSt.,Monrovia.FrankO.Olmstead,G.C.,830N.Marguerita,Alhambra.F.M.Padelford,O.S.,%HuntingtonLibrary,SanMarino.DonaldD.Palmer,G.S.T.,570ArroyoBlvd.,Pasadena.JohnT.Parish,F.I.T.,12239Falkirk,LosAngeles.W.H.Richards,F.N.I.,331S.HarvardBlvd.,LosAngeles.WardRitchie,R.G.M.,2110GriffithParkBlvd.,LosAngeles.EdwardRoberts,P.A.N.,Azusa.GeorgeRodecker,T.O.N.,615MonteVista,Azusa.ArthurSchlieter,N.G.T.,SanDimas.S.E.Skidmore,S.L.,Azusa.CorneliusSmith,S.C.,Azusa.RogerSmith,B.I.D.,329N.McCadden,LosAngeles.GeorgeE.Spence,F.F.,118S.Primrose,Monrovia.H.A.Spindt,G.P.,%BakersfieldJuniorCollege,Bakersfield.MilfordSpringer,R.P.2825S.DaltonAve.,LosAngeles.TerryStephenson,G.C.R.,SantaAna.MarshallStimson,G.L.,802Wright‐CallenderBldg.,LosAngeles.JessStockton,D.M.,2615SanEmidioSt.,Bakersfield.ClarkThomas,C.M.,SanDimas.R.W.Thompson,C.P.,701E.Walnut,Arcadia.ThomasTreanor,P.I.,269So.Coronado,LosAngeles.W.L.Ustick,G.L.,%HuntingtonLibrary,SanMarino.NealVanSooy,V.A.N.,Azusa.HenryR.Wagner,G.H.O.,1135WinstonSt.,SanMarino.GeorgeW.Walker,F.E.S.,109W.FremontPlace,LosAngeles.CarlI.Wheat,X.N.G.H.,2561HillDrive,LosAngeles.AlbertE.Wheatcroft,G.I.H.,1410HillDrive.LosAngeles.ThomasWilliams,H.I.P.,%SantaAnaJuniorCollege,SantaAna.W.L.Wolfskill,G.O.M.,275S.UnionAve.,LosAngeles.FredE.Young,M.A.T.,5223ElRio,LosAngeles.LordSholtoDouglasChapter,No.3,AuburnDr.WalterBanbrock,G.Q.,Auburn.ClarenceBarker,R.P.,Placerville.CharlesBeaver,G.I.H.,Auburn.LymanBolles,G.O.P.,Auburn.QuentonBrewer,F.D.,Auburn.Dr.ConradBriner,G.D.,Auburn.

CharlesH.Brown,D.F.D.,Auburn.EdwinBrown,D.F.D.,Auburn.LafayetteBurns,RI.Auburn.R.LaneCalder,T.O.P.,Auburn.AlvinCarveth,F.A.T.,Auburn.JackChampion,G.C.,Auburn.PaulClaiborne,G.N.,Auburn.HerbertClegg,G.O.P.,Auburn.WillCluff,N.G.C.,Auburn.HerbertConey,F.A.N.,Loomis.HerbertCooper,H.A.R.,Auburn.EarlCrabbe,N.G.H.,Auburn.HarryDavis,L.B.,Auburn.DormanJ.Dobbas,N.M.,Auburn.AndyDorer,P.U.D.,Auburn.MaxDunievitz,H.T.,Auburn.JohnDunnett,T.O.T.,Newcastle.WalterDurfee,D.F.D.,Auburn.AustinErskine,Q.O.,Auburn.HarryFurlong,C.V.,Auburn.FelixGervais,T.I.,Auburn.HenryGietzen,F.L.,Auburn.DaveGordon,F.A.,Auburn.PierreGoss,Jr.,C.P.,Auburn.NicholasHarper,Q.Z.,Auburn.ChesterHatch,H.H.,Auburn.ChrisHenney,G.H.,Auburn.RobertB.Howell,H.H.,Auburn.WilfredJansen,M.P.H.,Auburn.TrevorJeffreys,C.O.,Auburn.DavidH.Jones,PI.,Auburn.FredW.Junker,S.O.S.,Auburn.C.A.Keema,R.I.,Auburn.WilliamKinz,R.O.,Auburn.LouisKlumpp,G.K.,Auburn.JohnB.Landis,L.L.,Auburn.CharlesLee,C.V.,%P.G.E.Co.,Auburn.MarshallLowell,F.F.,NevadaCity.Earl,Lukens,R.R.,Auburn.HarveryMacDonald,R.P.,Auburn.Dr.J.GordonMackay,G.N.S.,Auburn.RobertMason,T.I.N.,Auburn.V.G.McCann,G.N.R.,Auburn.JohnMcLellan,G.N.,Auburn.W.H.Melinger,C.O.P.,Auburn.WilliamMiller,P.A.,Auburn.

E.A.Moss,G.H.R.,Auburn.JamesNealis,G.O.,Auburn.HarryOliver,D.F.D.,Auburn.ArthurPredmore,G.I.H.,Auburn.W.W.Polson,G.W.,Photographer,Auburn.WalterReynolds,NobleGrandKeeperoftheBlunderBusket,Auburn.HarrisRicksecker,R.P.M.,Auburn.WendellRobie,G.GoatKeeper,Auburn.JohnRobinson,G.Hist.,Auburn.Dr.JohnRussell,G.D.,Auburn.ArthurSather,T.O.,Auburn.W.A.Shepard,G.H.Auburn.RayShumaker,T.I.T.,Auburn.RalphSinclair,E.M.,Auburn.IkeSmith,T.N.T.,Auburn.JamesD.Stewart,R.P.,Auburn.MaxStrasberg,G.J.,Auburn.EmmettSullivan,R.P.,Auburn.ArthurSweet,F.F.,Auburn.AllenThurman,G.M.,Colfax.JohnM.True,F.O.B.,Auburn.RobertTyson,R.I.,Auburn.LouiVolz,V.D.,Auburn.RobertWallace,P.D.,Auburn.JamesWalsh,L.O.T.,Auburn.JohnG.Walsh,C.M.,Auburn.BentonWelty,T.L.,Auburn.QuiviraChapter,No.4,SantaFe,NewMexicoKennethM.Chapman,C.P.,CuratorLaboratoryofAnthropology,SantaFe.E.DanaJohnson,G.N.R.,Editor,SantaFeNewMexican,SantaFe.Dr.SylvanusT.Morley,C.V.,Director,ChichenItzaProjectforCarnegieInstitutionof

Washington,D.C.,SantaFe.JesseL.Nusbaum,N.G.H.,Director,LaboratoryofAnthropology,SantaFe.CarlRuppert,R.I.,Archaeologist,CarnegieInstitute,SantaFe.NewHelvetiaChapter,No.5,Sutter’sFortRoscoeL.Clark,C.P.,ForumBldg.,Sacramento.Jas.S.Dean,F.A.,1400HSt.,Sacramento.WilliamDurbrow,D.Fl.D.,GrassValley.FrankN.Killam,T.O.,151213thSt.,Sacramento.RobertMcKoy,C.A.,StateCapitol.C.F.Metteer,T.N.T.,113743rdSt.,Sacramento.

Al.M.(Pete)Nash,A.L.,250042ndSt.,Sacramento.FrederickW.Panhorst,G.O.,StateHighwayComm.,Sacramento.HarryPeterson,N.G.H.,Sutter’sFort,Sacramento.PercyG.West,C.V.,2571PortolaWay,Sacramento.PresidentWalkerChapter,No.6,SanDiegoJamesM.Clarke,G.N.R.,1620TorrenceSt.,SanDiego.WalterHussong,N.G.H.,EnsenadadeTodosSantos,BajaCalif.,Mex.StuartLake,C.M.,SanDiego.FranklinW.Walker,C.P.,308W.Brooks,SanDiego.CaptainJackChapter,No.7,AlturasAlbertSpicer,N.G.H.,Alturas,ModocCounty.Floating(orWhang)Chapter,No.8,PacificOceanGrantLeenhouts,N.G.H.,103So.Helberta,RedondoBeach.BillMeekChapter,No.9,ClamptonvilleWilliamBullMeek,LateRespectedHumbug,1849PlatrixBlvd,Clamparadise.ActonCleveland,N.G.H.,Clamptonville.EphraimBeeChapter,No.10,Lewisport,WestVirginiaBoydG.Stutler,N.G.H.%AmericanLegion,Indianapolis,Indiana.LeBrokeLodge,No.107,305,DownievilleTonyLavazola,C.M.Downieville.GeorgeTaylor,N.G.H.,Downieville.RossTaylor,G.N.R.,Downieville.HarryTibbets,C.P.,Downieville.KingSolomonLodge,No.107,306,MarysvilleDr.J.H.Barr,N.G.H.,YubaCity.HarryC.Best,R.G.M.,YosemiteValley.H.B.P.Carden,C.M.,927FSt.,Marysville.W.E.Davies,C.P.,Marysville.LouEichler,G.N.R.,AppealDemocrat,Marysville.EarlRamey,R.I.,1600YubaSt.,Marysville.

RandolphA.Schnabel,D.F.D.,YubaCity.E.B.Stanwood,C.V.,Courthouse,Marysville.GrandClamprepositoryofArchivesHenryE.HuntingtonLibrary,HarasserofHumbugs,SanMarino.