The Power of The Power of ListeningListening                         

““THE MOST BASIC AND THE MOST BASIC AND POWERFUL WAY TO CONNECT TO POWERFUL WAY TO CONNECT TO ANOTHER PERSON IS TO LISTEN. ANOTHER PERSON IS TO LISTEN.

 JUST LISTEN.  PERHAPS THE  JUST LISTEN.  PERHAPS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING WE MOST IMPORTANT THING WE

EVER GIVE EACH OTHER IS OUR EVER GIVE EACH OTHER IS OUR ATTENTION.”--ANONYMOUSATTENTION.”--ANONYMOUS

ListeningListening is the ability to accurately receive is the ability to accurately receive and interpret messages in the communication and interpret messages in the communication process.process.

It is a key to all effective communication, It is a key to all effective communication, without the ability to listen effectively without the ability to listen effectively messages are easily misunderstood – messages are easily misunderstood – communication breaks down and the sender of communication breaks down and the sender of the message can easily become frustrated or the message can easily become frustrated or irritated.irritated.

Listening vs. HearingListening vs. Hearing

►HearingHearing- physical process; natural; - physical process; natural; passivepassive

► ListeningListening- physical & mental - physical & mental process; active; learned process; a process; active; learned process; a skillskill

HEARING LISTENING

Perceiving words and sounds

Making sense of sounds

Perceiving and understanding the words

Noticing tone of voice, inflexion, volume

Noticing mood of the speaker

Keeping mind clear of distractions

Noticing nonverbal cues, including body

language, facial expressions, distance

between people

Perception (and sorting out)

of sounds and voices

Applied cognition (Perceiving, paying

attention, reasoning and remembering

messages)

“I hear it” “I get it”

Fast FactsFast Facts

►We listen at 125-250 wpm, think at We listen at 125-250 wpm, think at 1000-3000 wpm.1000-3000 wpm.

►75% of the time we are distracted, 75% of the time we are distracted, preoccupied or forgetful.preoccupied or forgetful.

►20% of the time, we remember what we 20% of the time, we remember what we hear.hear.

►More than 35% of businesses think More than 35% of businesses think listening is a top skill for success.listening is a top skill for success.

►Less than 2% of people have had formal Less than 2% of people have had formal education with listening.education with listening.

Percentage of Time We Spend on Percentage of Time We Spend on Each Type of CommunicationEach Type of Communication

Mode of Communication

Formal Years

of Training

Percentage of Time Used

Writing 12 years 9%

Reading 6-8 years 16 %

Speaking 1-2 years 30%

Listening 0-few hours

45%

Top-down strategies Top-down strategies are listener based; the are listener based; the listener taps into background knowledge of the listener taps into background knowledge of the topic, the situation or context, the type of text, topic, the situation or context, the type of text, and the language. and the language. 

listening for the main idealistening for the main idea predictingpredicting drawing inferences/taking notesdrawing inferences/taking notes summarizingsummarizing

Bottom-up strategiesBottom-up strategies  are text based; the are text based; the listener relies on the language in the listener relies on the language in the message, that is, the combination of message, that is, the combination of sounds, words, and grammar that creates sounds, words, and grammar that creates meaning. meaning. listening for specific detailslistening for specific details recognizing word soundsrecognizing word sounds recognizing word-order patternsrecognizing word-order patterns

Bad Listening HabitsBad Listening Habits

► Criticizing the subject or the speakerCriticizing the subject or the speaker►Getting over-stimulatedGetting over-stimulated► Listening only for factsListening only for facts►Not taking notes OR outlining everythingNot taking notes OR outlining everything► Tolerating or creating distractionTolerating or creating distraction► Letting emotional words block messageLetting emotional words block message►Wasting time difference between speed of Wasting time difference between speed of

speech and speed of thoughtspeech and speed of thought

Factors That Hinder Listening

►Many factors hinder our listening. Here are a few examples:

Daydreaming.

Preparing our responses ahead of time.

Thinking about other people, places or things.

7 Ways to Improve Your Listening

►Here are 7 strategies and suggestions to help you improve your listening skills.

1.) Increase your listening span: ►Try to resist the temptation to interrupt.

►Make sure the speaker has had a complete chance to make his or her point before you speak.

► If you don't get the whole message, ask the speaker to repeat what they said.

Ways to Improve Your Listening

►2.) Take time to listen: Don't put obvious limitations on your

listening time - the speaker will feel rushed.

►3.) Listen between the lines: Don't just listen to what is being said.

Try to understand the attitudes, needs and motives behind the words.

Ways to Improve Your Listening

►4.) Give your full attention: Nodding or interjecting occasionally to

clarify a point lets the speaker know you are interested.

If the speaker pauses briefly, don't rush to fill the silence.

Use open-ended questions to encourage elaboration.

Ways to Improve Your Listening

►5.) Restate the message: When you are sure that the speaker has

finished, restate the main points.

This is a good organizing strategy for you.

It also gives the speaker assurance that the message has been received.

Ways to Improve Your Listening

►6.) Listen for ideas as well as facts: A good listener makes an effort to understand

what the facts add up to.

►7.) Don't monopolize: Resist the urge to dominate a situation or to feel

that you know everything about a situation.

Be open to new ideas and allow the speaker to have his or her say.

Active Listening (3 Steps)Active Listening (3 Steps)

1.1. ListenListen

2.2. QuestionQuestion

3.3. Reflect-Reflect-ParaphraseParaphrase

Step 1: ListenStep 1: Listen

► To Feelings As Well As WordsTo Feelings As Well As Words Words – Emotions -- ImplicationsWords – Emotions -- Implications

► Focus on SpeakerFocus on Speaker Don’t plan, speak, or get distractedDon’t plan, speak, or get distracted

►What Is Speaker Talking About?What Is Speaker Talking About? Topic? Speaker? Listener? Others?Topic? Speaker? Listener? Others?

► Look At SpeakerLook At Speaker► Use Verbal & Non-Verbal EncouragersUse Verbal & Non-Verbal Encouragers

Step 2: QuestionStep 2: Question

►3 Purposes3 Purposes Demonstrates you are listeningDemonstrates you are listening Gather informationGather information ClarificationClarification

►Open-endedOpen-ended Tell me more?Tell me more? How did you feel?How did you feel? Then what happened?Then what happened?

Step 3: Reflect-ParaphraseStep 3: Reflect-Paraphrase

►Reflect What Is Said (In your words)Reflect What Is Said (In your words)►Reflect FeelingsReflect Feelings►ReframeReframe

Capture the essence of the Capture the essence of the communicationcommunication

Remove negative framingRemove negative framing Move toward problem solvingMove toward problem solving