Living Beyond Yourself

Living Beyond Yourself

Husbands Empowered

for Affection

“Marriage is when you agree to spend the rest of your life sleeping in a room that’s too warm,

beside someone who’s sleeping in a

room that’s too cold.”

“Marriage is when you agree to spend the rest of your life sleeping in a room that’s too warm,

beside someone who’s sleeping in a

room that’s too cold.”

Ephesians 5:21Ephesians 5:21

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

There is something in me that does not want to submit to others.

There is something in others that makes me not want to submit to them.

There is something in me that does not want to submit to others.

There is something in others that makes me not want to submit to them.

7 The sinful mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. 8 Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God.

7 The sinful mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. 8 Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God.

Romans 8:7-8 Romans 8:7-8

Romans 8:9-10

You, however, are controlled not by the sinful nature but by the Spirit, if the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Christ.

If you won’t get along with your spouse,

you won’t get

along with God.

If you won’t get along with your spouse,

you won’t get

along with God.

Marriage is an

image of Christ

and the church

Marriage is an

image of Christ

and the church

32 This is a profound mystery — but I am talking about Christ and the church.

32 This is a profound mystery — but I am talking about Christ and the church.

God created marriage to also demonstrate the intimacy

between Christ and his church.

For your Maker is your husband — the LORD Almighty is his name

For your Maker is your husband — the LORD Almighty is his name

Isaiah 54:5 Isaiah 54:5

Israel’s Idolatry was equated with

adultery

Israel’s Idolatry was equated with

adultery

‘Return, faithless Israel,’ declares the LORD, ‘I will frown on you no longer, for I am merciful,’ declares the LORD, ‘I will not be angry forever.

‘Return, faithless Israel,’ declares the LORD, ‘I will frown on you no longer, for I am merciful,’ declares the LORD, ‘I will not be angry forever.

Jeremiah 3:12-14Jeremiah 3:12-14

13 Only acknowledge your guilt— you have rebelled against the LORD your God, you have scattered your favors to foreign gods…

14 “Return, faithless people,” declares the LORD, “for I am your husband ...”

13 Only acknowledge your guilt— you have rebelled against the LORD your God, you have scattered your favors to foreign gods…

14 “Return, faithless people,” declares the LORD, “for I am your husband ...”

I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him. 3 But I am afraid that … your minds may somehow be led astray from your sincere and pure devotion to Christ.

I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him. 3 But I am afraid that … your minds may somehow be led astray from your sincere and pure devotion to Christ.

2 Corinthians 11:2-32 Corinthians 11:2-3

Hallelujah! For our Lord God Almighty reigns. 7 Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory!

For the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready.

Hallelujah! For our Lord God Almighty reigns. 7 Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory!

For the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready.

Revelation 19:6-7Revelation 19:6-7

Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

Ephesians 5:22-24Ephesians 5:22-24

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, with-out stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, with-out stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.

28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body.

28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body.

31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery — but I am talking about Christ and the church.

31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery — but I am talking about Christ and the church.

Submission is not

suppression!

Submission is not

suppression!

For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.

For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.

John 3:16 John 3:16

Agape Love

This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us.

This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us.

1 John 3:16 1 John 3:16

Agape Love

Christ gave himself to

sanctify his church

Christ gave himself to

sanctify his church

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.

What does it mean for a husband to

love like Jesus?

• It is a championing love – it wins a wife’s heart

(over and over)

• It is a championing love – it wins a wife’s heart

(over and over)

How did Jesus love the church?How did Jesus love the church?• He spent time with her• He won her trust • He prayed for her• He provided for her• He encouraged her• He wept with her • He trusted her

• He spent time with her• He won her trust • He prayed for her• He provided for her• He encouraged her• He wept with her • He trusted her

“Would you love me like Jesus now?”

Demand

Demean Dominate

Demand

Demean Dominate

What does it mean for a husband to

love like Jesus?

• It is a cultivating love• It is a cultivating love

28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body.

28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body.

Two sensitivities guide us in taking care of our bodies.

• we are sensitive to its NEEDS

• we are sensitive to its HURTS.

"Marriage is not wrecked by a blowout but rather by a slow leak – continued negligence and

inattention.”

"Marriage is not wrecked by a blowout but rather by a slow leak – continued negligence and

inattention.”

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

What does it mean for a husband to

love like Jesus?

• It is a connecting love• It is a connecting love

31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”

31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”

“Marriage is neither heaven nor hell;

it is simply purgatory.”

“Marriage is neither heaven nor hell;

it is simply purgatory.”

- Abraham Lincoln- Abraham Lincoln

33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

Women that are difficult to lead:

• Wounded woman

• Wired Woman • Wonder Woman

Application:

• Do you feel you are the most important person in my life?

• Are there any activities in my life you feel are more important than you are?

• Are there any special ways you believe I could better communi-cate how important you are to me?

Application:

• Do you feel you are the most important person in my life?

• Are there any activities in my life you feel are more important than you are?

• Are there any special ways you believe I could better communi-cate how important you are to me?