family ties of the tattooed lady

8/14/2019 Family Ties of the Tattooed Lady

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Copyright 2008 by One Real Story

Cover photo by Kelly J Kitchen

Book design by Katie Cummings

All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical

means including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing

from the author. The only exception is by a reviewer, who may quote short excerpts in a

review.

One Real Story

Visit website at www.onerealstory.com

Published in the United States of America

First Published: September 2008


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About the AuthorMarco Kaufman has published in several different fields, including literary criticism,

medical writing, and Holocaust historicism and currently writes on The Big Book of

Grievances, his weblog of short fiction, flash fiction, and works in progress.

About One Real StoryOne Real Story is an online creative writing center, providing the latest short stories, writing

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ContentsThe Tattooed Lady 5

Continental Divide 6

The UglyGuy 7

Polite 8

Headphones 9

Live and Dont Learn 10

A WayOut 11

Omission 12

Organization 13

Jewboy 14

Family Ties 15


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Family Ties of the Tattooed Lady 5

The Tattooed Lady

Brian was Catholic in the way that a lot of Catholics are. He didnt get to mass every

Sunday, he hadnt made an act of contrition in a decade at least, and he ate meat on

Fridays during Lent. But there was one thing he was certain of, and that was that he

intended to marry a fellow Catholic. After all, he believed in Jesus Christ and the

sacraments, even if he didnt partake of the latter as often as he should. At a party in

Brooklyn one night, he met a Jewish girl named Lydia. He was a little drunk, so he flirted

with her and sang the Groucho Marx song to her that bore her name. They kissed a little,

and she asked him if he wanted to go upstairs to her apartment, which was in the same

building, with her. Brian was interested, but he had scruples: It could only be about sex, he

said. It couldnt be about anything more than that, because he was Catholic and she was

not. She agreed to his terms (she had had a bit to drink herself) and so they went upstairs.

Eventually Brian fell out of touch with the mutual friend whose party he had been at that

night. When the Catholic clergy abuse scandal broke, he took what he believed to be a

moral stance and left the church. He thought of Lydia then and how he had probably comeoff when he gave his conditions to their sleeping together. He wanted to apologize, but he

hadnt asked for her phone number, or even her last name.


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Continental DivideJames had just moved to the

suburbs from the city after living

downtown for eight years. It was

only then that he was mugged infront of a convenience store only a

few blocks from his apartment

building. The men that mugged

him were black and had, James

figured, come from the

neighborhood across the street

from the convenience store, which

was almost entirely black. What the

men didnt know was that in

crossing that street, they had

crossed a county line and, if theywere caught, would be under the

jurisdiction of a town with very few

black people living there. They

would be lucky, Bob thought, if

they had a single black juror, and in

a wealthy town such as that one,

they would assuredly not only be

found guilty, but they would get

some jail time as well. It frustrated

James that the men were never

caught. He wanted them to know that he had worked for divestment from South Africawhen he was in college. How could they have attacked him when they owed him their

thanks?


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The Ugly Guy

Nancy was stuck with the ugly guy while her friend was somewhere behind the shopping

center screwing his better-looking friend, Stuart. They didnt say much to each other while

they waited for the other two; instead they smoked cigarettes and listened to the radio that

the ugly guy had been carrying with him when they met up. When the other two finally

emerged from behind a dumpster, the four of them walked to Nancys house, where her

friend was staying the night since Nancys mother was away. Stuart kissed her friend good

night, gratuitously and graphically in front of Nancy and the other guy, who must have felt

obligated in some way, because he leaned toward her and kissed her, very briefly, but on

the lips. After that, when they would pass one another in the halls of their high school,

where he was a year or two ahead of her, she would smile and say hello. She never didlearn his name.


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PoliteMatt met Suzy at the Barnes

& Noble on Union Square

North. It was the first time

hed set up an Internet date.They hadnt exchanged

photos online, but they

managed to find one

another. Matt bought coffee

for them both these were

the days before the latt

and they talked about books.

She had been an English

major in college, as had he,

and he was talking to her

about Bierces The Ox-Bow Incident, which he had only recently read for the first time.When it came time for Matt to leave, he asked Suzy for her phone number and whether he

could call her, and she said yes and gave him her number. Matt called a few days later, only

to be told by Suzy that she wasnt interested in seeing him again. Then why did you give me

your phone number? He asked her. She said it was to be polite. Better youd have been

honest, Matt said. That would have been polite. She hung up on him.


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HeadphonesChris and Don were sitting in

Chriss dorm room when there

was a knock at the door. It was a

guy named Jay. Chris had nevermet him before, but Don knew Jay

because they had the same major.

Jay was stopping by because Don,

who was editor of the schools

literary magazine, had rejected a

poem by him, and he wanted to

know why. For several minutes,

Don tried to explain to Jay the

reasons he rejected the poem;

meanwhile, Chris put on a CD

and was listening to both themusic and the increasingly heated

conversation. When finally Jays

anger exploded and he tackled

Don, Chris didnt move.

Eventually, Jay had Don pinned to

the ground and was punching him

in the face over and over. Chris

put on a set of headphones and

turned up the volume on the CD player. He had never really liked Don.


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Live and Dont LearnThey sat at a table in a

local club. She was

unhappy, she told him.

She was depressed, even.She was an artist, and he

didnt understand her.

(She was an artist, by the

way a painter and

sculptor of some

renown.) She didnt think

they should see one

another anymore. He

wasnt surprised: It had

seemed to be heading in

that direction for sometime. Ten years later he

married another artist.

This artist was in retirement, although he encouraged her to begin working again. When

she did begin to work again, however, she told him that their marriage was in trouble. She

was unhappy, she told him. She was depressed, even. She was an artist, and he didnt

understand her.


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A Way OutHe had wanted to break up with

her for some time. It wasnt that

he didnt love her. Rather, hewas disintegrating

psychologically, and he didnt

want to put her through that. He

began faking a case of

agoraphobia and canceling dates

with her, hoping she would get

tired of him and dump him.

When she was invited to a

Halloween party, she asked to

him to accompany her, and he

said no. She indicated that a former boyfriend of hers would be at the party clearly a ruseto get him to come with her but he would not relent. The next day on the telephone she

told him that she had slept with her ex-boyfriend the previous night. He broke up with her

and hung up the phone. Now he could fall apart all my himself.


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OmissionMike had not spoken to most of

siblings for several years when he

died. When he was nearly dead, he

told his sons-in-law, Nick and Eddie,to stand guard outside the funeral

home where the viewing was held to

keep any of his despised family from

attempting to attend. And he told

his one brother who he was talking

to, Frankie, not to tell any of the rest

of the brothers and one sister that

he was dead. Mikes viewing and

funeral went off without a hitch; no

unwanted relations arrived. Ten

days later, Frankie was walkingaround the neighborhood, and he

bumped into his and Mikes oldest brother, Joe. They talked for a while, and Joe got

around to asking Frankie whether he had seen Mike lately. Yeah, Frankie said. I saw

him about ten days ago. He neglected to mention Mike was in a coffin that day.


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Organization

Whereas Philip organized his records alphabetically, Paul organized them by the order that

they were acquired. Philip wondered how Paul could remember, since the collection of

records was at least twenty years old. Its easy, Paul would explain. The first record I

bought was Ziggy Stardust by Bowie. I liked it so much that I bought the rest of his records.That brought me to Eno, which brought me to Roxy Music, which brought me to Bryan

Ferry, which brought me to . . . and so on. Philip thought that Paul had an extraordinary

memory to be able to organize his records and books that way. If Paul had tried it, hed

never find anything. The first record hed bought was Billy Joels The Stranger and he

didnt own it anymore. As far as what Billy Joel had led him to, he had no idea. Philip

asked Paul what he felt like hearing; Paul told him to put on Velvet Undergrounds

Loaded. Philip asked where he could find that. Next to the Lou Reed records, Paul said.

Where did you think?


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JewboyJacks grandfather had been Jewish

by birth, but he had become a

Catholic when he married Jacks

grandmother, who was of Austrianparentage. Jacks father had married

Jacks mother, an Italian-American,

and they raised Jack in a

predominantly Italian-American

neighborhood. Jacks wife Rachel

was Jewish by birth, and even

though Jack had converted to

Judaism long before they met and

got married, Rachel always insisted

she was more Jewish than Jack.

To prove her point, she would citeinstances of anti-Semitism, her early

awareness of the Holocaust, her

grandmothers repeated rapes at the

hands of Don Cossacks in Ukraine,

and so on. Jack never told Rachel

that his nickname among his childhood friends in his Italian-American neighborhood was

Jewboy.


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Family TiesThey had lived in the same

apartment building for years,

but they had never met. He

had done odd jobs for herfather, who was the

superintendent, and she

knew all of his aunts and

uncles and many of his

cousins because her

grandfather lived on the

same street as his

grandmother. It wasnt until

the superintendent invited

him to dinner that he met

her. They began dating soonafter that. But the parents

didnt become better

acquainted until the superintendent had brandished a gun in a nearby bar and someone

had called the police. The young man went to his father and told him that he needed him

to hide the bullets from the superintendents gun. That way, the police couldnt charge him

with assault with a deadly weapon; an unloaded gun only amounted to a misdemeanor.

The young mans father agreed to help, and when the superintendent was bailed out, he

came and thanked the young mans parents for helping him out. He left with the bullets, of

course.


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Published by One Real Story 2008
http://onerealstory.com/

family ties of the tattooed lady

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