effective parenting in a defective world (used as a presentation at the brokenshire college of toril...
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Effective Christian Parenting in Today's Modern WorldTRANSCRIPT
BERNARDO L. PAÑARES
EFFECTIVE PARENTING
IN A DEFECTIVE WORLD
DIVINE DECREES TO
PARENTS
SEGMENT 1
Love the LORD your God with all your heart,with all your soul, and with all your strength.Take to heart these words that I give youtoday. Teach them to your children. Talkabout them when you're at home or away,when you lie down or get up. Write themdown, and tie them around your wrist, andwear them as headbands as a reminder. Writethem on the doorframes of your houses andon your gates.
DEUTERONOMY 6:1-9
DIVINE DECREES TO PARENTS
Deut. 6:1-9
…teach them
diligently to
your children”
“and these
Words…
…shall be
on your
hearts…
SEGMENT 2
Commit yourself to GIVE TIME to
your children
HAVE QUALITY TIME
WITH YOUR CHILDREN
HOW DO WE GIVE QUALITY
TIME TO OUR CHILDREN?
1.) DECIDE ON YOUR PRIORITY IN LIFE.
2.) MAKE SURE TO HAVE MEAL WITH YOUR
CHILDREN AT LEAST ONCE A DAY.
3.) PLAN FOR FAMILY VACATIONS AND
ACTIVITIES.
4.) AVOID OVER COMMITMENTS.
Ano ba talaga
ang mas
mahaga
sa iyo…
TrabahoTrabahoTrabahoTrabaho o o o o
PamilyaPamilyaPamilyaPamilya????
1.) DECIDE ON YOUR
PRIORITY IN LIFE.
2.) MAKE SURE TO HAVE MEAL WITH
YOUR CHILDREN AT LEAST ONCE A DAY
Compared to teens who
ate with their families five
to seven times a week,
teenagers who had fewer
than three family dinners
a week were almost four
times more likely to try
tobacco, more than twice
as likely to use alcohol
and 2.5 times more likely to use marijuana, according to new
information released by Columbia University's National Center
on Addiction and Substance Abuse.
3.) PLAN FOR FAMILY
VACATIONS AND ACTIVITIES.
4.) AVOID OVER COMMITMENTS.
“Parents, do not provoke
your children to anger, or
they will become
discouraged.”COL. 3:21
ENCOURAGE
1.) Show Faith
2.) Develop Self-Respect
a. Do not compare your children with others
b. Be enthusiastic about their interest
c. Look at their own merit.
d. Ask for their opinions/suggestions.
3.) Recognize Effort and Improvement
a. Focus on efforts not the achievements
b. Learn their limits
c. Give positive expectations
4.) Focus on the Strengths and Assets of your child
a. Be a talent scout of good behavior
b. Look at alternative ways of viewing the situation
HOW DO WE ENCOURAGE
OUR CHILDREN?
1. SHOW FAITH
�Mag Mag Mag Mag tiwalatiwalatiwalatiwala sasasasa kanilangkanilangkanilangkanilang kakayahankakayahankakayahankakayahan....
HOW DO WE ENCOURAGE
OUR CHILDREN?
2.) Develop Self-Respect
a. Do not compare your children with others.
b. Be enthusiastic about their interest.
c. Look at their own merit.
d. Ask for their opinions/suggestions.
3.) Recognize Effort and Improvement
HOW DO WE ENCOURAGE OUR
CHILDREN?
a. Focus on efforts not the achievements
b. Learn their limits
c. Give positive expectations
4.) Focus on the Strengths and Assets of your
child;
a. Be a talent scout of good behavior
b. Look at alternative ways of viewing the
situation
HOW DO WE ENCOURAGE
OUR CHILDREN?
AFFIRMATION
1.) Set a Good Example for them to follow.
(Ps. 101:2-3)
I will be careful to lead a life
that is without blame.
When will you come and help me?
I will lead a life
that is without blame in my house.3 I won't look at anything that is evil.
I hate the acts of people who aren't faithful to you.
I don't even want people like that around me.
1) WORDS OF AFFIRMATION
2) QUALITY TIME
3) RECEIVING GIFTS
4) ACTS OF SERVICE
5) PHYSICAL TOUCH
5 LOVE LANGUAGES
REBUKE & REBUKE & REBUKE & REBUKE &
DISCIPLINE YOUR DISCIPLINE YOUR DISCIPLINE YOUR DISCIPLINE YOUR
TEENSTEENSTEENSTEENS
Proverbs 19:18 (NLT)
Discipline your children while there is hope. Otherwise you will ruin their lives.
Proverbs 13:24 (NIV)
He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.
Proverbs 23:13 (NLT)
Don't fail to discipline your children. They won't die if you spank them.
1. ESTABLISH CLEAR BOUNDARIES
2. BE CONSISTENT
3. LET THEM
SUFFER THE
CONSEQUENCE
OF THEIR
WRONG-DOING.
5. DISCUSS ISSUES NOT
PERSONALITIES.
PROV. 19:18
1) Establish clear boundaries.
2) Be consistent.
3) Let them suffer the consequence of their wrong-doing.
4) Hate the sin but love the sinner.
5) Discuss issues not personalities.
6) Be firm but loving.
7) Give appropriate discipline.
8) Forgive and forget.
REBUKE & DISCIPLINE
YOUR CHILDREN
Two Ways of Training1) Training by Lips
2) Training by Life
ADOLESCENCE
A phase of life with major physical, emotional and behavioral changes.
The adolescent behavior alters the youngster’s relations and interaction patterns with others.
Most of the adolescents in these days are facing problems and getting into more and more troubles.
The Teen-ager’s Brain:
A work in progress
• The frontal lobe of the brain does the
bulk of its maturation between the
ages of 12 and 20.
• This region of the brain that supress
risky behavior is not fully formed until
the age of 25.
� Lack of common sense� Thinking that seems rigid� Decisions that seem irrational� Disorganization� Impulsiveness� Mood changes� Inadequate emotional control� Risk taking
BEHAVIOR
BEHAVIOR
RELATIONSHIPS
BELIEFS
VALUES
For I am constantly
aware of your unfailing
love, and I have lived
according to your truth.
PSALMS 26:3
NEW LIVING TRANSLATION
“Teach the truth in
love…”
EPHESIANS 4:15
RULES WITHOUT RELATIONSHIP
LEADS TO REBELLION
CASE STUDY:
MICHAEL JACKSON
“All I ever
wanted in life
was a
fathers love.”
So it becomes hard for them to live with
the truth of God’s word.
MOST OF OUR YOUNG PEOPLE NOWADAYS
FAILED TO SEE THAT UNFAILING LOVE
Oprah Winfrey?
Kris Aquino?
Lady Gaga?
Lady Batud? (Hahahaha!)
Justin Beiber?
WHO IS THE MOST INFLUENTIAL
PERSON FOR A TEEN-AGER TODAY?
�A father is a LEADER….
�Leadership is Influence (nothing more, nothing less)
�Due to lack of intimacy with our children
BUT FATHERS HAVE LOST THEIR
INFLUENCE
The Pressures of Living is Enormous
Two Ways of Training1) Training by Lips
2) Training by Life
The biggest trust is being entrusted with
a life. The biggest responsibility is to live
that trust throughout your life.
PARENTING IS TRUST
http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
REFENCES
The Universe blossoms in the face of a child. By bringing out the best in your child, you bring out the best in the Universe.
PARENTING IS GARDENING
http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
The sleepless nights, the career
sacrifices, the postponing of so many of
your own activities. The prize of
parenting comes at a price.
PARENTING IS
A LABOR OF
LOVE
http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
From fire and sharp objects. From unkind
eyes. From negative thoughts and cruel
criticisms. From getting into deep waters.
From getting into a shallow life.
PARENTING IS PROTECTING
http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
Gently and with love.
Understanding the intent of the child
before rushing to punish pay.
PARENTING
IS
CORRECTIN
G
http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
And laughing. And making faces.
Singing together. Giving and receiving
hugs. Holding the child’s hand in
silence for a few moments before asking
“What is wrong, dear?” plans.
PARENTING
IS SMILING
http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
Again and again. Month after month.
Year after year. And yet, never failing to
correct and connect.
PARENTING
IS
FORGIVING
http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
Of a lifetime. Without expecting returns
of favor. With genuine sharing and
caring. With friendship bands. And
heartfelt bonds.
PARENTING
IS
FRIENDSHI
P
http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
So that you can see the world from their
eyes. Feel their tears, live their smiles,
and understand their dreams.
PARENTING
IS BEING A
CHILD
http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
Their peculiar tantrums. Tucking them
in the blanket in the middle of the night.
Their helping hand with heavy luggage.
And with some of life’s burdens.
PARENTING
IS
ENJOYING
http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
Opening the gates when the time has
come. Showing them the way.
Being able to say “Goodbye! Wherever
you go, you will always be in my heart.”
PARENTING
IS LETTING
GO
http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
Happy Parenting!!
For hourly thoughts on various subjects, visit us at:http://www.thoughtperhour.com/