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Cooper, Charles; Breneman, BethWriting Achievement of California Eighth Graders: AFirst Look.California State Dept. of Education, Sacramento.88

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California State Department of Education, P.O. Box944272, Sacramento, CA 94244-2720.Reports - Evaluative/Feasibility (142) -- Reports -Research /Technical (143)

MF01/PC03 Plus Postage.*Achievement Tests; Autobiographies; DescriptiveWriting; Elementary Education; *Elementary SchoolStudents; *Essay Tests; Expository Writing; *Grade 8;Persuasive Discourse; Problem Solving; Rhetoric;State Programs; Testing Programs; Writing(Composition); *Writing Evaluation; Writing Skills

IDENTIFIERS *California Assessment Program

ABSTRACTThe first statewide direct writing assessment was

conducted for grade 8 by the California Assessment Program (CAP) inthe spring of 1987. Each student wrote an assay in response to 1 of15 prompts (writing tasks) representing: (1) an autobiographicalincident; (2) a report of information; (:,) a solution to a problem;and (4) an evaluation. In all, 282,155 essays were scored at fourregional Sites by 290 teachers; this number includes some papersdouble scored in a reliability study. About 99% of the students hadresponded to a topic. Scoring considered rhetorical effectiveness, afeature score about some characteristic (such as coherence), and aconventions score for mechanics. Most students wrote adequate ormarginally adequate essays (68%), some wrote exceptionally well(13%), and others wrote poorly (19%). Eighth graders were mostcompetent at reporting information, less competent at writingautobiographies, and least able to produce the two types ofpersuasive writing. Control of the conventions was better than ofrhetorical strategies. Recommendations for teachers begin withencouraging more direct writing instruction and more analysis of whatis read. Recommendations for school administrators, parents, andteacher educators are included. (SLD)

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WritingAchievementof CaliforniaEighth Graders

A First Look

U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATIONOffice o/ Educational Research and Improvement

EDUCATIONAL RESOURCES INFORMATIONCENTER (ERIC)./ CENTER

document hap been reproduced asreceived from the person or organizationOriginating It.

0 Minor changes have been m-de to improvereproduction quality

Pomts olview or opinions slat ed inthisdoCument do not necessarily represent officialOERI position or policy

N9 CALIFORNIA STATE DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATIONBill Honig Superintendent of Public InstructionSacramento, 1988

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Preliminary

"PERMISSION TO REPRODUCE THISMATERIAL HAS BEEN GRANTED BY

Ent &E/0E14,9A)

TO THE EDUCATIONAL RESOURCESINFORMATION CENTER (ERIC)."

WritingAchievementof CaliforniaEighth Graders

A First Look

Prepared by

Charles CooperUniversity of California, San Diegoand

Beth BrenemanCalifornia Assessment Program

>

Publishing Information

This report vies prepared by Charles Cooper, University of California, SanDiego, and Beth Brenemtn, California Assessment Program, California StateDepartment of Education, and was published by the Department, 721 CapitolMall, Sacramento, California (mailing address: P.O. Box 944272,Sacramento, CA 94244-2720). Questions relating to this report should bedirected to Beth Breneman at 916-322-2200. The report was distributedunder the provisions of the Library Distribinion Act and Government CodeSec:ion 11096.

Copyright © 1988 by the California Stage Department of Education

4

Contents

Acknowledgments iv

Chapter 1. Executive Summary of the Report 1

Chapter 2. Wilting Assessment Description and Rationale 7

Chapter 3. Development of Writing Assessment 13

Chapter 4. Writing Assessment: Autobiographical Incident. 19

Chapter 5. Writing Assessment: Evaluation 25

Chapter 6. Writing Assessment: Problem Solution 31

Chapter 7. Writing Assessment Report of Information 37

Chapter 8. Summary of Writing Achievement 43

Chapter 9. Summary of Recommendations 53

iii5

Acknowledgments

The first statewide assessment of the writing achievement of California eighth graders was anunderrakifig c _major proportions. The success of this effort is a tribute to the students, teachers, andadministrators across the state who have cooperated so generously during every phase of the project,conducted under the auspices of the California Assessment Program (CAP).

Special acknowledgment is due to the creators of the assessment: the members of the CAP WritingDevelopment Team. Representing the California Literature Project, California Writing Project, and Cali-forn:a Association of Teachers of English, this group of outstanding teachers has provided crucial leader-ship in test development, scoring, and staff development activities for CAP.

The CAP Writing Assessment Advisory Committee has functioned in a central advisory capacity,bringing continuity from a grade eight pilot project conducted in 1984 to the first statewide assessment in1987. It was this group that identified the types of writing to be assessed at grade eight, recommended aslow and careful phase-in of the several types of writing, and pointed out the need for staff development tohelp districts prepare for the assessment.

The spring 1987 writing assessment, which reflected the activities of these two groups, culminatesin this report. Members of the Writing Assessment Advisory Committee and CAP Writing DevelopmentTeam (listed here) also reviewed sections of the report, contributed to the interpretation of results andoffered recommendations.

Every assessment is the result of a collaborative effort. Special acknowledgment is extended toJohn Bianchini for providing expert technical guidance and analysis; to Charles Cooper and Iry Peckhamfor shouldering final responsibility for prompt development, scoring guide development, and the creation ofA Report to Teachers on Writing Assessment*, to Pat Elias for directing day-to-day practical and logisticaloperation: of test development and implementation; to Phillip Gonzales for facilitating the linguistic andcultural sensitivity review of prompts; to James Gray, Mary Ann Smith, Mel Grubb, and Mary Barr forguidance, counsel, and wisdom in planning the assessment and coordinating statewide staff developmentactivities; to Julia Stanfill for planning and implementing communication strategies on behalf of manyaudiences; and to Barbara Voloner for planning and coordinating the readings at four regional scoringcenters across the state.

Department colleagues, Francie Alexander and Jim Smith, offered valuable assistance in the reviewand preparation of this report as did CAP staffers: Sue Bennett, Tom Fong, Ed Hensley, Mark Hoffeditz,Diane Levin, Pat McCabe, Sandy McDevitt, Holly McLaughlin, Joyce Mondor, Tej Pandey, Zack Taylor,Bonnie Williamson, and Linda Zimmerer. The entire CAP staff was involved innumerous day-to-dayactivities supporting the writing assessment. Renee Best, Yolanda Drechny, Dalene Guerard, Gary Konas,Dawna Magness, Margi Osborn, Elias Regalado, and Tricia Shults.

The production of this report was coordinated by Juanita Jorgenson with the help of Rebecca Aye,John Ro&rt Cornell, and Mary Dean.

ii,

Writing Assessment Advisory Committee

Diana AdamsLakeside Unified School District

Arthur Applebee- Stanford University

Eva BakerCenter for the Study of Evaluation

Mary BarrCalifornia Literature Project

Nancy BrownellSan Juan Unified School District

Sherryl BroylesLos Angeles Unified School District

Jacqueline ChaparroSan Diego County Office of Education

Karla DellnerSan Juan Unified School District

Alice FurrySacramento County Office of Education

Mary Lee GlassPalo Alto Unified School District

Mel GrubbLos Angeles County Office of Education

Rosemary HakeCalifornia State University, Los Angeles

Wayne HarshUniversity of California, Dris

Marilyn KahlWest Covina Unified School District

Katherine KaneSan Diego County Office of Education

Joe LawrenceSan Juan Unified School District

Helen LodgeCalifornia State University, Northridge

Dorothy MaloneyConejo Valley Unified School District

Miles MyersCalifornia Federation of Teachers

Joanna McKenzieCalifornia State University, Northridge

Kathleen NaylorHacienda-La Puente Unified School District

George NemetzState Department of Education

Shirley PatchSan Juan Unified School District

Edys QuellmalzEducation Consultant

Jim ScarpinoConejo Valley Unified School District

Ed WhiteCalifornia State University, San Bernardino

Acknowledgments v

CAP Writing Development Committee

Sherryl BroylesLos Angeles Unified School District

Diane BergerBurbank Unified School District

Loyal CarlonSan Diego Unified School Distr. :t

Fran ClaggettEducation Consultant

Martha DudleySelma Unified School District

Kent GillDavis Unified School District

Stephanie GrahamLas Virgenes Unified School District

Sam HatchLodi Unified School District

Alice KawazoeMilpitas Unified School District

Joe LawrenceSan Juan Unified School District

Helen LodgeCalifornia State University, Northridge

Judith MachadoTulare Joint Unified School District

vi Writing Achievement A First Look

Barbara Miller-SouvineySan Diego County Schools Office

Marie NeerModoc Unified School District

Claire Pe ltonSan Jose Unified School District

Carol PenaraRichmond Unified School District

Nancy PrestonTorrance Unified School District

Sandy RogersLong Beach Unified School District

Bill SaundersLos Angeles Unified School District

Julie SimpsonFullerton Unified School District

Carol TateishiRoss Unified School District

Carol ToomerHueneme Elementary School District

Fred VogtDelano Unified School District

Marilyn WhinySouth Bay Unified School District

Don WinsorYucaipa Unified School District

Chapter 1

Executive Summary of the Report

California's first statewide direct writing assessment was conducted for grade eightby the California Assessment Program (CAP) in the spring of 1987. Each student wrotean essay in response to one of 15 prompts (writing tasks) representing four types ofwriting: autobiographical incident, report of information, problem solution, and evalu-ation. This report, based on state-level results from that assessment, for the first timeprovides California's educators, legislators, and citizens with data on the actual writingachievement of virtually all students in the state at one grade level. In previous yearsonly multiple-choice tests of written language skills were administered by CAP.Because 1987 was the first year of the assessment, this report contains baseline infor-mation only and does not include information about year-to-year changes.

California's writing assessment was designed to be a wide-range achievement testto reflect the goals and standards of excellence contained in the EnglishLanguage ArtsFramework' and its related curriculum documents. The assessment directly addressesguideline number thirteen in one of those iL.-,cuments, the EnglishLanguage ArtsModel Curriculum Guide", which states that

Students, after having opportunities to build background, write in many different modes ofdiscourse, such as story, observation, biographical sketch, poetry, dialogue, essay, and=Port-

Four types of writing were assessed in 1987 for grade eight (autobiographical inci-dent, report of information, problem solution, and evaluation). Two additional types arebeing included in the 1988 assessment (biographical sketch and story), and twomorewill be added in 1989 (speculation about causes or effects and observational writing).Thus, the complete array of writing types will have been assessed by the end of thethird year. As the assessment evolves, new prompts related to literary texts and to broadunderstandings in science and historysocial science will be added to address a broaderrange of goals in the framework.

Two key groups have guided and createdCalifornia's new direct writing assessment since itsinception. Providing guidance for the overalldirection of the assessment has been the CAPWriting Assessment Advisory Committee, whichconsists of elementary and secondary schoolteachers; curriculum specialists, testing experts andadministrators from school districts and offices ofcounty superintendents of schools; universityprofessors; and representatives from the CaliforniaWriting Project and the California LiteratureProject. All prompts, scoring guides, and theWriting Assessment Handbook: Grade 83 werecreated by members of the CAP Writing Develop-ment Team, consisting of English teachers fromacross California who were selected for theirextraordinary performance in the classroom.

The CAP Writing Development Team devel-oped a scoring system so that each paper would beassigned three scores: a rhetorical effectivenessscore reflecting the thinking and composingrequirements within a type of writing; a featurescore providing additional information about acharacteristic in the writing such as coherence orelaboration; and a conventions score reflecting thedegree of correctness in usage, punctuation, andspelling. All scoring guides were developed on ascale of 1 to 6, ranging from minimal evidence ofachievement to extraordinary achievement.

During July, 1987, a total of 282,155 essayswere scared at four regional scoring sites (LosAngeles, Sacramento, San Diego and WalnutCreek) by 290 teachers in eight days. The totalnumber of essays consisted of the 268,719 paperscollected in the assessment plus a 5 percent sampleof papers that was double-scored for the reliabilitystudy.

The test results revealed that students took thenew test seriously. Approximately 99 percent ofthe students who took the essay test comprehendedthe writing tasks and responded to the topic. (Lessthan one-quarter of 1 percent failed to respond tothe writing task, and approximately one-half of 1percent did not respond to the topic.)

Major Findings

Major findings from the assessment follow:

Most students wrote adequate or margin-ally adequate essays (levels 4 and 3: 68

2 Writing Achievement. A First Look

percent). A small percentage of studentswrote impressively (levels 5 and 6. 13percent); a larger percentage of students(too many in the opinion of the WritingAssessment Advisory Committee) wrotepoorly (levels 1 and 2: 19 percent). (Forexamples of student essays illustratingeach score point for each type of writing,see chapters 4 through 7.)

Grade eight students seemed most compe-tent at reporting information (52 percentscored 4 or higher); noticeably lesscompetent at autobiography (46 percentscored 4 or higher); and markedly lessskilled at the two kinds of persuasivewriting in this assessmentarguing forsolutions to solve problems (41 pementscored 4 or higher) and supporting theirjudgments (34 percent scored 4 orhigher).

Grade eight students demonstrated bettercontrol of conventions than of rhetoricalstrategies. For example, in evaluation 34percent scored 4 or higher for rhetoricaleffectiveness, and 58 percent scored 4 orhigher for conventions. For every type ofwriting assessed, students scored higherin conventions than in the thinking andcomposing requirements for each type ofwriting.

Essays were most coherent in autobio-graphical incident and more coherent inproblem solution than in evaluation.

The Writing Assessment Advisory Committeeagreed that many students who do not do well arethose who are tracked into "skill and drill" curric-ula in which bland dittos and worksheets substitutefor effective writing instruction. The committeemembers expressed the expectation that scoreswould improve markedly in future years as teach-ers benefit from the statewide staff developmentefforts being conducted by the California Litera-ture Project and California Writing Project, as theylearn to work more effectively with the WritingAssessment Handbook', and as many teachers gaininsight into establishing criteria for student writing.

10

Recommendations

Recommendations from the Writing Assess-ment Advisory Committee and CAP WritingDevelopment Team for teachers, administrators,parents, and teacher educators follow:

Recommendations for Teachers1. Teachers should offer junior high school

and elementary school students moredirect instruction in the-special writingand thinking strategies required fordifferent types of writing. Teachersshould expect of each student the highestpossible writing achievement in severalkinds of writing, not mere competency inone or two. Teachers will need to assignsustained (multiparagraph) writing fre-quently and help students revise tostrengthen rhetorical effectiveness. Byhelping students analyze their own writingalong with published writing, teachersenable students to gain confidence with thespecial writing strategies of many types ofwriting.

2. Because writing development depends inpart on reading development, teachersshould ensure that all students read widely,analyze some works in depth, speculateabout characters' motivations, reflect onhuman values, and debate social issues.Students should also have an opportu-nity to read and analyze the same typeof reading they are writing. For ex-ample, they should read and discusspublished autobiography as they writeautobiographical incidents and first-hand biographies, short stories as theywrite stories, articles speculating aboutthe causes of events or phenomena asthey write essays speculating aboutcauses, and so on. The Writing Assess-ment Handbook Grade 8' includes sug-gested readings appropriate to the types ofwriting CAP assesses.

3. Teachers should extend the intensiveand sustained literacy program de-,zribed in the first two recommenda-tions to all studentsdisadvantagedstudents as well as advantaged students,students whose primary language is

other than English as well as fluentspeakers of English, and low achieversas well as high achievers. Some stu-dents are denied opportunities for suchenriched programs as a result of inap-propriately low teacher expectations.Special efforts must be made to ensureequally challenging classrooms for all."Limited-English Proficient" studentsshould have opportunities to build on theirabilities to think about a topic by begin-ning with informal writing and proceedingthrough the writing process to producefully realized essays. All students shouldhave practice telling and writing abouttheir experience as it supports their emerg-ing values and opinions.

4. Teachers should provide more carefulinstruction ;n types of persuasive writ-ing, such as those assessed by CAP, forstudents in middle school. In keepingwith Recommendation 2 teachers shouldpresent samples of persuasive writing asliterature in junior high and middle schoolsto provide students with exemplary modelsto help them write their own arguments.(See Writing Assessment Handbook:Grade 8' for suggested readings for evalu-ation, problem solution and speculationabout causes and effects.)

5. Teachers should discuss with eachstudent the specific strategies of auto-biographical incident (using dialogue;providing visual details of scenes; andshowing characters moving, talking,gesturing) to help them lift their writingabove the level of rambling or briefgeneralization. This emphasis should bereinforced by the careful reading ofpublished autobiography and the use ofexemplary models of student-producedautobiographical writing such as those in-cluded in the Writing AssessmentHand-book: Grade 8'.

6. Teachers should help students use thestages of the writing process, withspecial attention being given to specificcomposing strategies for different kindsof writing so that students will learn torevise their writing with the help of

11Executive Summary 3

4-

appropriate criteria. The best classroomwriting assignments require a rich, sus-tained composing process for completion:discussion, prewriting, or research; draft-ing; teacher conference and guided peerresponse; revision; appreciative peer read-arounds; sr.:dent self evaluation of learningduring the composing process; and displayor publication. (See the HandbookforPlanning an ;,ffective Writing Program',for a more complete description of the .stages of the writing process.)

7. Teachers should keep in mind othertypes of writing not assessed by CAP asimportant and worthwhile types thatshould not be dropped simply becausethey are not tested. There are types ofwriting (such as poetry and song lyrics)that are desirable in a well-roundedEnglishlanguage arts program but notappropriate for large-scale assessment.

Recommendations for School District and School-Site Administrators

1. School-site administrators shouldensure that CAP writing assessmentmaterials are available to allEnglishlanguage arts teachers. Thesematerials include A Report to Teachers onWriting Achievement: Grade 85 (1987),along with scoring guides and sampleessays (mailed to all junior high andmiddle schuols in November, 1987); andthe Writing Assessment Handbook: Grade8' (mailed to all California school districtswith an eigith grade in November, 1986).(For further information regarding thesedocuments, contact the CAP office at 916-322- 2200.)

2. School-site administrators should bringal! teachers together to discuss thepossibilities for sustained writing in allclasses at all levels. Beginning in 1988,CAP grade eight test prompts will directsome students to write about their learningIn history and science as well as their

ailing of literature. A middle school withgrades six tkrongh eight might want todivide up for special emphasis by gradelevels. the eight types of writing to be

4 Writing Achievement A First Look

assessed by 1989, ensuring, however, thateach type is returned to at least once eachyear. ...uch a plan, combining writing withcore and recreational reading require-ments, would provide the systematic,articulated Englishlanguage arts curricu-lum called for in California'sEnglishLanguage Arts Frameworks. (S LSection IV, "Management Guidelines," inthe Writing Assessment Handbook: Grade83.)

3. The best staff development model forEnglishlanguage arts provides for a seriesof workshops over a substantial period oftime. If students are to meet the highliteracy standards set by the CAP writingassessment- junior high school teachersneed a deep understanding of the writingand thinking demands of a wide range oftypes of writing. Such understandingrequires time to read, write, and discuss.One-time staff -development presentationsoffering only further gimmicks will notleepen teachers' understanding of dis-course or increase their students' achieve-ment. Administrators should make aspecial effort to help teachers schedulein-service training workshops extendingover several sessions and led by quali-fied teacher-consultants.

4. Because good writing instruction requiresan amount of tutorial or conference time,teachers must be able to talk to studentsabout their writing iii progress, not justmark and grade finished essays. For thisbar,: requirement for good writing tobe met, class size must, be reduced forall Englishlanguage arts teachers inCalifornia schools.

5. Many publishers and private consultantsare already offering materials and work-shops and promising to improve Er :dents'scores on the CAP writing assessment.Schools and school districts shouldevaluate these offerings carefully. Schoolsshould especially consider whetht.:published materials offer any:aing notalready available in the teacher-developed,classroom-tested Writing AssessmentHandbook: Grade 8'. Consultants promis-

12

ing formulas, easy solutions, or quickresults will have little to offer teacherswho want to teach seriously the types ofwriting CAP assesses and to prepare theirstudents for adequate to high achievementin these types. Consultants who are unableor unwilling to concern themselves withthe specific rhetorical requirements of thetypes of writing CAP assesses will be ableto add very little to what teachers alreadyknow. If writing instruction is to moveto a new level of effectivenesstobecome an even higher priority withinthe context of a balanced literature-based Englishlanguage arts curricu-lumthen only the best-qualifiedconsultants will be able to contributematerials and workshops. Members ofCAP's Writing Development Team arequalified to advise other teachers, alongwith California Writing Project and Cali-fornia Literature Project Fellows who havebeen specially trained to present CAPmaterials.

6. The CAP writing assessment should notsupplant individual student writing assess-ment at the school site. Schools need todevelop their own assessment programs,such as portfolio assessment orschoolwide assessment of writingsamples. The CAP writing assessmentprovides teachers with useful strategiesand techniques for their own assessments.For example, the types of writing assessedin grade eight suggest a wide range ofwritings that might be included (or evenrequired) in a portfolio, and criteriaoutlined in the scoring guides could assistin evaltmdng a student's best work in aportfolio. Additional types of writing, suchas poetry, song lyrics and dialogue, mightalso be included. Writing portfolios canfollow students from year to year andprovide repeated occasions for students'assessments of their writing developmentand for parent conferences.

Recommendations for Parents

1. Parents should encourage good teachingof writing by inquiring specifically

about the amount and variety of sus-tained (multiparagraph) writing theirchildren are being assigned in everyclass. They can ask how much of thewriting will be revised for both rhetoricaleffectiveness and conventions. Parents canshow their appreciation to teachers whomake engaging assignments and encour-age children's writing development.

2. Parents should show their children thatthey are especially interested in all thewriting they complete at school. Chil-dren can read their writing aloud anddisplay it on the refrigerator door, and theycan talk about what they like best about apiece of writing. Parents should respondfirst of all to the ideas and insights in thewriting. They should look for somethingto praise and need not correct errors unlessasked by the children. To persist with thechallenging work of learning to write,young writers need their writing to betaken seriously and to be praised andencouraged, especially by parents andsiblings.

3. Parents can ask their children to write.Several writing situations are suggested byclassroom teacher Mary Adamczyk (in theNew York Times, January 3, 1988).Students may be encouraged to:

Compose invitations to a dinner,party, or picnic.Compose stories for a sibling.List things needed for an overnightstay.Plead a case for an additionalprivilegeanything from a laterbedtime to a driver's license.Make a deal ("If you let me . .

then I'll . .") Considering faultymemories, this is a particularlygood time to get it in writing.Justify an allowance increase withan expense account and budget,perhaps including a savings plan.Rationalize a special purchase (forexample, a hamster or a computervideo game).Negotiate wages for extra choresby submitting a written bid

13

Executive Summary 5

describing the work to be done,benefits, wages, guarantees, anddeadlines.

Recommendations for Teat.:::71r Educators

1. College and university English depart-ments should offer English teachers intraining a balanced program in litera-ture, language study, and writing.Teachers need writing workshops as wellas literature courses. They must be knowl-edgeable about the full range of writtendiscourse. Better, they should be confidentwriters across the full range of writtendiscourse.

2. English methods courses should intro-duce students to the new EnglishLan-guage Arts Framework' as well as toCAP writing assessment materials. TheWriting Assessment Handbook: Grade 8'and Writing Assessment Handbook: Grade12' can contribute substantially to stu-dents' education in contemporary dis-course. Model student essays, scoringguides, writing assignments, classroom ac-tivities, and recommended readings pro-vide rich material for discussion andlesson planning.

References

1. EnglishLanguage Arts Framework for California Public Scho&ls, Kindergarten Through Grade Twelve. Sacia-mento, Calif.: State Department of Education, 1987.

2. EnglishLanguage 9rts Model Curriculum Guide, Kindergarten Through Grade Eight. Sacramento, Calif.. StateDepartment of Education, 1987.

3. Writing Assessment Handbook: Grade 8. Sacramento, Calif.: State Department of Education, 1986.4. Handbook for Plannihg an Effective Writing Program. Sacramento, Calif.. State Department of Educatton, 1986.5. A Report to Teachers on Writing Achievement. Grade 8. Sacramento, Calif.. State Department of Education, 1987.6. Writing Assessment Handbook: Grade 12. Sacramento, Calif.. State Department of Education, 1987.

6 Writing Achievement A First Look

Chapter 2

Writing Assessment: Description and

Rationale

Public education has become the focus of numerous studies that have created anunprecedented awareness of the schools and new demands to provide for students thebest that the schools can offer. The importance of writing and thinking to the educationof all studentsindeed, to the survival of a democratic society itselfhas been madeclear in those studies. For example, in High School: A Report on Secondary Educationin America, Ernest L. Boyer states that:

The first curriculum priority is language. Our use of complex symbols separates humanbeings from all other forms of life. Language provides the connecting tissue that bindssociety together, allowing us to express feelings and ideas, and p,. werfully influence theattitudes of others.'

Yet we are reminded again and again that many school programs are falling short.Students often report being bored with school. And teachers work with little more than"teacher-proof" materials and lockstep programs. The EnglishLanguage ArtsFramework for California Public Schools, Kindergarten Through Grade Twelve2characterizes the ineffective Englishlanguage arts program as a fragmented skill-basedcurriculum that limits students to work sheets and activities addressing only low-levelcognitive skills. Writing programs in which students aie typically assigned low-leveltasks and papers are read only for the conventions of usage, grammar, and spelling arenot uncommon. The loss of human potential as a result of such stultifying programs isdifficult if not impossible to assess.

The authors of the Middle Grade Task Force report, Caught in the Middle: Educa-tional Reform for Young Adolescents in California Public Schools', emphasize that forall middle grade students there is a compelling need to ensure an intellectually stimulat-ing school environment. They state:

7

15

Students in the middle grades experience a rapidunfolding of their intellectual capacities. There is adramatic emergence of the ability to think reflec-tively-4o think about thinking. This ability opensthe way for more complex and abstract thoughtprocesses. These have profound implications for thedevelopment of moral reasoning, problem solving,critical thinking, and the ability to use scientificmethods and make aesthetic judgments.

These capacities must be matched educationally bycurricula and instructional practices which demandboth thought and thoughtful communication in theclassroom. .. . Academic achievement rises whenstudents experience thoughtful classrooms. Butachieving these goals is complex.

The authors of the Middle Grade Task Forcereport offer a number of recommendations forachieving academic excellence and helping stu-dents realize the "highest and best" in their devel-opment. In the area of assessment they recommendthat:

Assessment programs for the middle grades shouldbe comprehensive; they should include measure-ment of a broad range of educational goals relatedto student achievement and program effectiveness;the primary purposes of middle grade assessmentshould be to compile data which lead to improvedcurriculum and instructional programs and moreeffective student support services.

If one were to imagine an effective statewideprogram designed to stimulate needed reforms inmiddle grade schools, certain criteria wouldimmediately come to mind. One might imaginethat such a program would raise intellectualstandards and expectations that are achievableunder improved instructional conditions; that itwould stimulate increased breadth and comprehen-siveness related to student achievement and pro-gram effectiveness; that it would introduce some-thing new and yet still be familiar and respectableto teachers and would correspond with teachers'intrinsic understanding of valuable educationalgoals; that it would receive public attention en-couraging entire school communities to worktogether to promote better learning; that it wouldprovide practical materials and associated staffdevelopment activities to help teachers implementthese new standards on a day-to-day basis. Such aprogram is already in place in California.

8 Writing Achievement: A First Look

In the spring of 1987, California's first state-wide direct writing assessment was conducted ingrade eight by the California Assessment Program(CAP). Because this program is still new to manyof California's educators, policymakers, andcitizens, this document includes a program descrip-tion and brief rationale underlying the program(both of which follow in this chapter), a descrip-tion of the development of the assessment (Chapter3), and the state-level results from the assessment(chapters 4 through 9).

Description of the Assessment

California's new grade eight writing assess-ment is unique in the nation. Several specialfeatures that distinguish this program from otherwriting assessments are described in the followingsections: (1) standards of excellence; (2) multipletypes of writing and thinking assessed; (3) uniquescoring system; and (4) supportive instructionalmaterials.

Standards or Excellence

Although many states administer direct writingassessments, most of the assessments are part ofminimal competency testing programs and typi-cally include only one topic in a given year andrepresent one type of writing for all students.California's writing assessment was designed to bea wide-range achievement test reflecting theliterature-centered goals of the EngiishLanguageArts Framework:, which calls for instructionalprograms that guide all students through a range ofthinking and writing processes as they studyaesthetic, ethical, and cultural issues. Whilechallenging the best students, the test enables allstudents to demonstrate their achievement aswriters. The scoring system created for the assess-ment sets high standards of achievement for eachtype of writing assessed and allows for the moni-toring of progress from year to year at the school,district, and state levels. This assessment embodiesthe spirit of the school reform movemer t and is farremoved from tests designed to measure theminimal skills that students might need to functionat a marginal level in society. Particular attentionhas been given to making the system accessible toall minority students and students with specialneeds (as described in Chapter 3 of this report).

16

Multiple Types of Writing and Thinking Assessed

Matrix sampling, in which each student takesonly a fraction of a total test in any given contentarea, has been used on all CAP tests since 1973-74.This technique is extremely efficient because itrequires less time for testing, results in a broadercoverage of the curriculum, and yields more stableresults for reporting to groups (schools and dis-tricts) and more information that teachers can useto evaluate and strengthen curricula. Of course,matrix sampling does not provide scores forindividual students. The most important virtue ofsuch testseven beyond efficiency and reliabil-ityis their potential to achieve breadth andbalance in content coverage, as called for by theMiddle Grade Task Force. This factor is especiallyapparent in the assessment of writing.

Students should be systematically taught acomplete array of types of composing and thinkingto prepare them adequately for higher education,the job market, and citizenship in a democracy. Asstated in the EnglishLanguage Arts Framework=,"the world of work and academia demand ofstudents many forms and types of communica-tion." Matrix sampling is an ideal testing strategyfor an assessment designed to promote systematicinstruction in a wide variety of types of writing andthinking.

Eight types of writing that reflect a wide rangeof writing experiences were selected to be phasedin over a three-year period in grade eight: (1)report of information; (2) problem solution; (3)autobiographical incident; (4) evaluation; (5) story;(6) first-hand biography, (7) observational writing;and (8) speculation about causes or effects. Thefirst four types were assessed in 1987. Story andfirsthand biography were added in 1988, and observational writing and analysis of causes oreffects will be added in 1989.

Unique Scoring System

The scoring system developed for the CAPwriting assessment was designed to be a state-of-the-art model for the nation. The system uses threetypes of scores and measures general as well asspecific features in each essay. Each of the268,719 essays produced in the assessment wasscored for (1) rhetorical effectiveness, whichfocuses on the special thinking and writing require-ments for each type of writing; (2) a general

feature, such as coherence or elaboration importantto the type of writing being assessed; and (3)conventions of usage, grammar, and spelling.

A three-level scoring system has numerousadvantages. The rhetorical score provides informa-tion about students' achievements in the specialthinking and composing requirements of a type ofwriting; and, without creating restrictions orformulas, the scoring guide provides a clear roadmap to improved achievement. School reports ofthe results allow teachers to compare studentachievement on different types of writing and toassess instructional strengths and weaknesses,factors leading to improved curricula concernedwith higher-order thinking, writing, and communi-cation abilities. The special feature score providesadditional information about the ability of studentsto achieve coherence or pit-vide sufficient supportand elaboration in a given type of writing. Theconventions score reveals students' mastery of theconventions of standard written English so thatteachers can compare and contrast student achieve-ment on higher-order composing skills (as re-flected in the rhetorical and feature scores) tostudent achievement in the more mechanical sup-porting skills of standard usage, punctuation,capitalization, and spelling.

Supportive instructional Materials

Because the new grade eight CAP writingassessment represents a major departure for theCalifornia Assessment Program, members of theWriting Assessment Advisory Committee recom-mended that materials be developed to helpdistricts prepare for the new writing test. To meetthis practical need, CAP created a specialdocument, Writing Assessment Handbook. Grade84. The existence of enriching, framework-alignedsupportive instructional material is another featureunique to the CAP writing assessment.

Rationale for the Assessment

To understand the new CAP writing assess-ment requires an understanding of the rationalebehind it. The following rationale, which extends

begins with an explanation of the assessment as areflection of an enlarged, research-based approachto literacy education. This approach in turn relates

the description of the feat= that distinguish theCAP writing assessment from other programs,

Description and Rationale 9

17

to the discourse theory that provides the foundationfor the assessment and is briefly explained throughreference to a communication triangle. The needfor a more sophisticated theory and research-basedview of literacy education is then related tosociety's need to prepare students for the twenty-first century through a well-balanced writingprogram. The significance of the four types ofwriting assessed in CAP's first statewide assess-ment is discussed in the report of results for eachtype of writing in chapters 4 through 7.

Research-based Approach

The CAP writing assessment is based ontheory and research and a definition of writing thatchallenges what James Britton called in TheDevelopment of Writing Abilities (11-18)5 the"naive global sense of the ability to write." InResearch on Written Composition', George Hill-ocks reported that the use of good pieces of writingas models remains an effective way to teachwriting. Hillocks also reported that "scales, crite-ria, and specific questions which students apply totheir own or others' writing also have a powerfuleffect on enhancing quality" (249). Identifyingexemplary models and deriving instructionallyaseful criteria depend on a framework or typologyfor classifying the variety of types of writing. Sucha classification scheme must be specific enough toallow useful, important, and practical distinctionsbetween one type of writing and another toemerge.

Fortunately, such composition theorists asMoffett, Britton, and Kinneavy have begun toestablish theoretical foundations for a neededschema of writing types based on whole writingsthat exist in the real world. Once a type of writinghas been identified, a range of possible distinguish-ing characteristics and elements can be establishedfor that type of writing so that useful criteria canbe defined and exemplary, illustrative modelsidentified for instructional purposes. Once studentspossess an understanding of how to make use of avariety of rhetorical elements in their writing (suchas process narration of steps to implement asolution and anticipation of readers' objections inproblem solution; or visual details, sounds orsmells of a'scene, dialogue, and specific narrativeaction in autobiographical incident), writing is de-mystified. The reasons for a particular grade on a

10 Writing Achievement: A First Look

paper should no longer puzzle a student. Instruc-tion can become more focused and supportive ofstudents' needs, opening up a broader range ofrhetorical possibilities for students as they developconfidence in one type of writing and then another.Of course, elements of writing mastered for onetype of writing can be used for other, related typesof writing, as instruction moves across the range.Such an approach to writing instruction respondsto Guideline Number Thirteen in theEnglishLanguage Arts Model Curriculum Guide'.Students, after having opportunities to buildbackground, write in many different modes ofdiscourse, such as story, observation, biographicalsketch, poetry, dialogue, essays and report.

The creators of the CAP writing assessmentbelieve that it is very important to increase teacherawareness of the genres in which teachers areoperating as they teach children to read and write.One way to ensure that students can comprehend atype of writing is to Insist that they have multipleexperiences composing that type of writing. Asstudents internalize the features inherent in a giventype of writing, they will be better prepared to readand learn from that type. And they will be able tocompose essays within a given type of writing onlyif they have had multiple opportunities to readselections of that type. The general theory andtypology for the CAP writing assessment isderived from the work of many experts in thewriting community, including those who haveguided the work of the writing assessment con-ducted by the National Assessment of EducationalProgress (United States) and England's Assess-ment of Performance Unit (the agency responsiblefor conducting and reporting Great Britain'snational assessment). The specific types identifiedfor the grade eight CAP writing assessment wereselected by members of the CAP Writing Assess-ment Advisory Committee, which consists ofelementary and secondary school teachers; curricu-lum specialists; testing experts and administratorsfrom school districts and offices of county superin-tendents of schools; university professors; and rep-resentatives from the California Writing Project,the California Literature Project, the NationalAssessment of Educational Progress, the NationalCenter for the Study of Writing at the University ofCalifornia (Berkeley), and the National Center forthe Learning and Teaching of Literature at theState University of New York at Albany.

Discourse Theory

All types of writing can be located within acommunication triangle in which the writer,subject, and audience represent the three points ofthe triangle. The type of writing emerges out of thewriter's rhetorical purpose, knowledge of thesubject, and awareness of the audience. Focus onthe writer produces personal or expressive writing,such as autobiographical incident; on the subject,explanatory or expository writing, such as report ofinformation; and on appeal to audience, argumen-tative writing, such as problem-solution andevaluation. Focus on the center of the triangle, thewritten text itself, produces literary or representa-tional writing, such as a story, in which deeperlevels of meaning can be detected, analyzed, andapplied to the human condition. The eight types ofwriting selected for the grade eight writing assess-ment represent a variety of types of writing from

the communication triangle to ensure that studentsare instructed across the discursive range.

Other writing assessments have recognized theneed to assess more than one type of writing. Suchprograms typically establish three broad, umbrella-like categories of writing, such as persuasive,literary/imaginative, and explanatory writing.Reducing all types of writing to three generalcategories results in categories that are so broad asto be vague. What makes the CAP writing assess-ment unique is its specific categorization of writingtypes that allows for the generation of clusters ofprompts and one scoring guide for each carefullydefined type of writing. It removes vagueness fromthe broader categories and provides teachers andstudents of writing the kind of tailored informationthey need for improving achievement within eachtype of writing assessed without being limited orformulaic.

Two kinds of expressive writing

Autobiographical IncidentFirsthand Biography

writer

subject

reader

Two kinds of expository writing

writer

Report of InformationObservational Writing

subject

expository

reader

Presentational or literary writing

Storywriter

subject

reader

literary

Three kinds of persuasive writing

Problem SolutionSpeculation aboutCauses or EffectsEvaluation

writer

subject

reader

19

Description and Radom to 11

Preparation for Twenty-first Century

To function in the rapidly approaching twenty-first century in a job market that may consistlargely of jobs that do not yet exist, students aregoing to need many flexible thinking/comprehen-sion/composing abilities and a sound knowledgebase about history, government, economics,science, literature, and mathematics. To ensure thata complete array of problem-solving and decision-making skills are taught, educators must assess awide array of composing skills that require stu-dents to demonstrate their creative problem-solving abilities and to draw upon their learning in

multiple content areas. An. ethnically heterogene-ous democracy demands greater sophistication inassessment to create an accountability system thattells the public and educators what they really needto know. In such an exemplary assessment, stu-dents cannot mask their knowledge or lack of it byfilling in bubbles on a page. In a high-qualitywriting assessment, students must use languageactively to display in public their own thinking andreasoning abilities as they proceed from premise topremise. If genuine educational reform is to beachieved, assessment must undergo the kind ofreform that will encourage effective, well-balancedwriting programs.

References

1. Ernest L. Boyer. High School: A Report on Secondary Education in America. New York Hazper & Row, 1983.2. EnglishLanguage Arts Framework for California Public Schools, Kindergarten Through Grade Twelve. Sacra-

mento, Calif.: State Department of Education, 1987.3. Caught in the Middle: Educational Reform for Young Adolescents in California Public Schools. Report of the

Superintendent's Middle Grade Task Force. Sacramento, Calif.: nate Department of Education, 1987.4. Writing Assessment Handbook, Grade 8. Sacramento, Calif.: State Department of Education, 1986.5. James Britton, et al. The Development of Writing Abilities (11-18). London' Macmillan Education Ltd., 1975.6. George Hillocks, Jr. Research on Written Composition: New I' irections for Teaching. Urbana, Ill.. ERIC Clearing-

house on Reading and Communications Skills and the National Conference on Research in English, 1986.7. English Language Arts Model Curriculum Guide, Kindergarte.. Through Grade Eight. Sacramento, Calif.. State

Department of Education, 1987.

12 Writing Achievement: A First Look

20

Chapter 3

Development of Writing Assessment

The development of the California Assessment Program writing assessment in-volved (1) test development; (2) test administration and scoring; (3) reporting; and (4)assistance to districts.

Test DevelopmentTest development involved selection of types of writing, development ofprompts,

and development of scoring guides:

Selection of Types of Writing

The first step in developing the writing assessment was to make a comprehensivelist of the types of writing to be assessed. To assist in this effort, a comprehensiveframework including types of writing that would be desirable in a complete writingcurriculum was sought. This framework covered a broad range of types, includingpersonal, expository (explanatory), presentational (imaginative), and persuasive writ-ing. It was from the comprehensive list that the Writing Assessment Advisory Commit-tee derived the types to be assessed in grade eight. Only continuing field testing anddevelopmental work will disclose which types are ideally suited to a grade level. In theabsence of such definitive information, the Writing Assessment Advisory Committeeidentified the eight types of.writing for grade eight using the following criteria:

emphasis of the best school writing programs. Would California's best teachersof writing at a certain grade be likely to assign a particular type of writing?The committee wanted to be certain that the best teachers would both value atype of writing and consider it central to the curriculum as suggested in theModel Curriculum Standards'.

13

atgdents' readingeaniences, Wouldstudents read the types of writing on thelist?

Students' cagnitivaglelp2ment, Wouldstudents be developmentally ready toengage in a part:40:2x type of writing?

Curriculum sequence between grades threeand twelve, Would a grade-level set ofwriting types appropriately follow anearlier set and at the same time preparestudents for a later set? The elmniitteealso considered what kinds of writing andthinking are needed for success Iv otherdisciplines, such as historysocial scienceand science.

Appropriateness for testing. Would it befair to expect students to compose a giventype of writing in a 45-minute testingperiod? Song lyrics and poetry, whiledesirable in a complete writing curricu-lum, were judged as inappropriate types ofwriting to be assessed.

Development of Prompts

The first step in the development of writini,tasks was to create a team of test developers, theCAP Writing Development Team. This group ofoutstanding California classroom teachers repre-sents the California Writing Project, the CaliforniaLiterature Project, and a cross-section of geo-graphical regions and constituencies throughoutthe state. This team has provided key leadership inboth test development and staff developmentactivities for California.

The development of prompts for this assess-ment has been comprehensive, rigorous, andpainstaking. Initially, prompt development wasconducted for grades eight and twelve simultane-ously. Large numbers of prompts were collectedfrom numerous sources, including Californiaschool district prompt collections, ETS advancedplacement tests, other state assessment programs,the National Assessment of Educational Progress,and California teachers' files. These prompts werefirst classified by the type of writing to be as-sessed. The Writing Assessment Advisory Com-mittee and several other groups were convenedthroughout the course of a year to develop prompts

14 Writing Achievement A First Look

for the types of writing selected by the committeefor grade eight and twelve to add to the promptpool. In February, 1986, the CAP Writing Devel-opment Team was formed to contribute to thearduous test development effort needed for :nisproject. Before meeting, the group reviewed all ofthe prompts in the prompt pool and wrote severalnew prompts. At their first meeting the CAPWriting Development Team and some members ofthe Writing Assessment Advisory Committeereduced the number of prompts from 300 to 156.

Eighty outstanding teachers were identifiedthrough the California Writing Project to partici-pate in a special March, 1986, field str,,iy of the156 prompts. The teachers administered two essaytopics to 50 students per topic, helped the studentscomplete a student questionnaire, examined thestudent essays and questionnaires, conductedstudent interviews about the prompts and thestudents' difficulties with them, summarized theinformation on teacher questionnaires for each ofthe two essay topics, and returned the materials forthe scrutiny of the CAP Writing DevelopmentTeam The number of prompts was then reduced to56 by the team members, who used carefullyspecified prompt revision guidelines. In addition,the prompts were checked against six criteria. Eachprompt had to:

Invite the desired type of writing. All ornearly all student essays are readilyrecognizable as the appropriate type.

Engage the thinking, problem-solving,composing, and text-making processescentral to the type of writing.

Be an assignment that teachers would wantto give their students.

Be challenging for many students and easyfor many students.

Produce interesting, not just proficient,writing.

Be liked by some students.

The prompts meeting these criteria were thensubjected to a rigorous linguistic and cultural biasreview in which the language content and content

of each prompt were carefully reviewed by repre-sentatives of several minority groups to ensure theaccessibility of every prompt to all students. In ad-dition, the prompts were subjected to an ETS(Educational Testing Service) sensitivity review.

Seven prompts for each of the eight types ofwriting were then field-tested. Every district thatwished to participate in field testing was included,and a statewide sampling of 25,195 studentsresulted. The papers from the May, 1986, field testwere then used for the development of the scoringguides, which were used for the preliminaryscoring sessions conducted in the smnmer of 1986.Data and reader responses generated from thescoring sessions resulted in further feedback forcontinued refinement of the prompts. A finalreading in December, 1986, resulted in additionalfeedback for final revisions of the grade eightprompts.

Scoring Guides

The CAP writing achievement scoring systemevolved from a 1984 grade eight pilot project.Beca'ise the primary goal of the pilot project wasto examine various writing assessment methodolo-gies to determine the most appropriate approachfor the California Assessment Program, severalscoring systems were explored during this prelimi-nary study.

A special ad hoc committee was constituted toresolve a number of complicated scoring issuesthat had arisen during the course of the grade eightpilot project. After a consideration of the instruc-tional implications of each scoring system and therelationship of these to the Model CurriculumStandards', a three-part scoring system (rhetorical,feature and conventions) was created.

Members of the CAP Writing DevelopmentTeam developed the scoring guides for the types ofwriting to be assessed for grade eight. The criteriaand standards embedded in each scoring guidewere derived from a careful study of each type ofwriting. Members of the CAP Writing Develop-ment Team first wrote on a given prompt from thearray of prompts for each writing type. Theteacher-created essays were then used as the basisfor a discussion about the special characteristics ofeach type of writing as evidenced by those models.Using an abundance of student essays producedduring the May field tests, members of the teamcontinued an in-depth study of V..: essays to

determine the special requirements and range ofpossibilities for each type of writing. Once thescoring guides were drafted, they were madeavailable to the members of the Writing Assess-ment Advisory Committee for review. The scoringguides were then pilot-tested during central andregional field test scoring sessions in July, 1986.Reader responses fmm the scoring sessionsprovided useful feedback for continuing revisionand refinement of the guides. In additional sessionsthroughout the fall of 1986, the work on thescoring guides was completed. The procedurespreviously described were used, and a final readingwas done in December to test all three parts of thescoring system.

Test Administration and Scoring

In April-May, 1987, each of 268,719 studentswrote an essay in response to one of 15 promptsrepresenting four types of writing: autobiographi-cal incident (five prompts); report of information(four pxrnpts); problem solution (three prompts);and evaluation (dune prompts). The CAP writingassessment was administered as part of the batteryof tests constituting the Survey of Academic Skills:Grade 82. The prompts were distributed randomlyso that every student had an equal probability ofreceiving any one of the 15 prompts. Students wererequired to complete a student information form atthe time of test administration. Examiners wereinstructed to allow a full 45 minutes of uninter-rupted writing time for completion of the essay.Essay booklets were then returned to the primarycontractor of the project, Educational TestingService (ETS).

The essays were scored under the direction ofETS at four regional scoring centers: San Diego,Los Angeles, Walnut Creek, and Sacramento. Onetype of writing was scored at each scoring center:problem solution at Walnut Creek, report ofinformation in Los Angeles, evaluation in Sacra-mento, and autobiographical incident at San Diegoz

The following tabulation shows the number ofscoring leaders and readers at each of the four cen-ters and the number of booklets scored at each site.

23Development 15

I

Chart 3-1

Sitt Prompts Leaders* Readers Booklets**

San Diego 5 14 78 89,740

Los Angeles 4 12 65 72,094

Walnut Creek 3 8 53 53,659

Sacramento 3 8 52 53,222

*Chief readers, assistant chief readers and table leaders.**Total number of booklets 282,155 plus 5 percent for the reliability study.

The scoring of 282,155 booklets was com-pleted in eight days in July, 1987, by 290 readersand leaders. One of the chief readers captured thespirit of the CAP scoring sessions in a lettersummarizing the group experience:

Now, weeks after dlr.: CAP reading for Report ofInformation in Los Angeles, the memory of teachersworking together in a collegial atmosphere on aproject we all want to succeed is still vivid andclear. Nothing could have prepared me for the ex-hilaration which came from evaluating and helpingothers to evaluate student work....

Our table leaders were our magnificent models!Whether arguing a score point or explainingdifficult ideas, the leaders were always professional,confident, secure, and positive....

Our readers were well-qualified, eager, and intelli-gent. For the most part, their feelings and ideasabout CAP and the reading itself remained positive.Many readers noted that the most rewarding part ofthe reading, however, was meeting other teachers.Others remarked that "being able to see papers fromacross the state" was beneficial.

The training materials used were excellent in allways. The only complaints from the readers werethat they could not take the materials home. Amidcries of "Let us keep the materials" and "Ourschools need them," it was obvious that the readersfound the training materials valuable and importantto the scoring of the student papers as well as forfuture use. . . .

Throughout our days together, good people workedwith excellent materials for a goal that is larger than

16 Writing Achievement: A First Look

all of us combinedto makeexcellent writers of all thestudents in California.

I am grateful that I an able touse CAP materials in myclassroom, that I can share theinformation with others, that Ihave been able to work on theevaluatioi of the papers, that Iam part of the CAP WritingDevelopment Team, and that Iam permitted to know and towork with such outstandingindividuals.

Reporting of Test Results

The results of the grade eight writing assess-ment at the school level have been reported to allschool districts in A Report to Teachers on WritingAchievement", a narrative report of school resultsdesigned for instructional use. A school anddistrict report for the Survey of Academic Skills:Grade 8 Writing Achievement' is designed forreporting to the public, for making district andschool comparisons, and for charting year-to-yearprogress.

A Report to Teachers on Writing Achievement'is a significant departure for CAP in that it wasspecifically directed to teachers for the first time.Every grade eight teacher in California wasprovided with a copy. The report was tailored tothe information needs of principals and classroomteachers and was not designed for comparison ofschools or other external comparisons.

Assistance to School Districts

Because the new grade right CAP writingassessment represented a major departure for theCalifornia Assessment Program, members of theWriting Assessment Advisory Committee recom-mended that materials be developed to help schooldistricts prepare for the new writing test. For thispurpose, a special document, the Writing Assess-ment Handbook: Grade 8', was created.

The Writing Assessment Handbook: Grade 84was intended as the primary communication andstaff development vehicle to acquaint administra-tors and teachers with the objectives of the writingassessment. This document contains eight writing

24

guides (one for each of the eight types of writing),the most useful part of the handbook for instruc-tion. Each writing guide includes a discussion ofthe importance of the type of writing, the distin-guishing features of the type, illustrative classroomwriting assignments, including prompts that mightbe useful in science and history-social scienceclasses, revision and editing guides, exemplarystudent essays and comments explaining thestrengths of a given essay, an example of at leastone published essay and comments, and a readinglist of published works within each type.

The Writing Assessment Handbook: Grade 8'was intended to serve many audiences within theeducational community. It includes a programoverview for all audiences, management guidelinesfor administrators, a chapter on writing assessmentand the curriculum for curriculum specialists,administrators and teachers, a chapter on studentswith special needs for teachers and administratorsresponsible for ethnically and linguistically diversepopulations, and transparency masters to meet thecommunication needs of workshop presenters.

A special training of trainers conference washeld in September, 1986, to inform staff develop-ment agencies statewide about the CAP assess-ment; its dimensions, purposes, and benefits, andits congruence with the English-Language ArtsFrameworks. The intent of the conference was todevelop a corps of trainers to train educatorsstatewide on the fundamentals of the CAP assess-ment. A total of 123 representatives from offices ofcounty superintendents of schools and CaliforniaWriting Project sites attended the two-day trainingsession.

As a result of the training of trainers confer-ence, participants received specific training inCAP's new writing assessment program. Califor-nia Writing Project teacher/consultants wereprepared to teach a cadre of teachers at each of 19sites in October, 1986, in preparation for staffdevelopment requests from schools and schooldistricts statewide. Through the efforts of the 19California Writing Project sites, 7,304 teacherswere involved in CAP in-service activitiesanumber that accounts for over half of the gradeeight teachers in the state.

Participants became aware of the need forcooperation among California's staff developmentagencies in preparing districts for the CAP writingassessment. Regional planning groups, ranging

from groups in which members had never talkedtogether before to groups in which memberssimply polished their already extensive plans forjoint staff development activities, demonstrated theneed for improved communication and coopera-tion.

The author of a "Report on Training of Train-ers" wrote that:

The September training of valuers, sponsored bythe Office of Staff Development and the CurriculumImplementation Center for English-Language Artswas a watershed! While we planned for a meetingof minds, we could not have anticipated the goodwill, the openness to issues and challenges, the joythat the participants found in tollcing and writingtogether. I believe that while there are still issues indirect writing assessment to be examined, theseissues became opportunities for the Septemberparticipants. I believe, too, that the spirit of workingtogether to make this assessment the best it can be,of creating better schoolwide writing programs, ofcooperating in the enormous training needs over-rode any past controversies related to the assess-ment`.

One hundred and twenty teachers, K-12,representing each of the state's six county superin-tendent areas, attended the 1987 summer instituteof the California Literature Project. This, the thirdCU institute held at UCLA, brought the numberof teachers intensively trained in the research baseand implementation strategies for the EnglishLanguage Arts Frameworks to 300. Included as anintegral part of the training is the concept ofclassroom assessment that incorporates keyfeatures from the CAP writing assessment.

After the summer institute, advanced trainingfor the 300 teachers has included the preparation oftwo teacher-to-teacher workshops on writingassessment so that all teacher/leaders are preparedto conduct such workshops in the future:

1. Extending and Assessing Learning is aworkshop in which participants explore avariety and range of assessment strategiesin a comprehensive English-language artsprogram.

2. Assignment to Assessment is a five-dayadvanced workshop specifically tied to the

25Development 17

CAP direct writing assessment. Partici-pants develop instructional units embody-ing framework principles and using thekinds of writing tested by CAP, field-testthem in their own classrooms, and revisethem according to results gained with theirown students.

As a part of the services provided to districtsand schools, by the California Literature Project,approximately 500 teachers participated in these

1

workshops in 1986-87. In partnership with theCounty-State Steering Committee, more of theseworkshops were conducted in 1987-88.

References

1. Model Curriculum Standards: Grades Nine Through Twelve. Sacramento, Calif.. CaliforniaState Board of Educa-tion, 1985.

2. Survey of Academic Skills: Grade 8. Sacramento, Calif.: State Department of Education.3. A Report to Teachers on Writing Achievement. Sacramento, Calif.: State Department of Education, 1987.4. Writing Assessment Handbook: Grade 8. Sacramento, Calif.: State Department of Education, 1986.5. EnglishLanguage Arts Framework for California Public Schools, Kindergarten Through Grade Twelve. Sacra-

mento, Calif.: State Department of Education, 1987.6. Mary Ann Smith. Report on Training of Trainers. Berkeley: Bay Area Writing Project, 1986 (unpublished).

18 Wr! ting Achievement: A First Look

26

fa

Chapter 4

Writing Assessment: Autobiographical

Incident

Chapters 4 through 7 report on the achievement of California grade eight studentsin the four distinctly different types of writing tested in April, 1987: autobiographicalincident, evaluation, problem solution, and report of information.

Each chapter contains a description of the type of writing assessed, a chart summa-rizing statewide achievement in that type, and sample essays illustrating the full rangeof writing achievement. Each set of sample essays includes one essay for rhetoricaleffectiveness, score points 1 through 6. Each essay's score for a complementary writingfeature and for conventions is also indicated. The three scoresfor rhetorical effective-ness, feature, and conventions are described in Chapter 8. Also in Chapter 8 achieve-ment in the four types is compared, and statewide average scores combining rhetoricaleffectiveness scores for all four types of writing are presented.

In examining the sample essays in this chapter and in chapters 5 through 7, readersshould keep in mind that the writers are thirteen years old. The best of them writeexceptionally well but not nearly so well, of course, as outstanding high school seniorsor college freshmen. It is crucial to remember, as well, that these are first -draft essays,written in 45 minutes, with limited time for planning and substantive revision. Readersshould also recognize that a single essay at a score point illustrates only one way todemonstrate the level of achievement represented by that score point. Although thescoring system provides detailed criteria for achievement at each score point, there isno single formula for high achievement.

Description of Autobiographical Incident

In autobiographical incident writers tell a story from their personal experience. Be-sides narrating an incident, writers tell readers what it has meant to them, disclosing theautobiographical significance of the incident. Thus, while this type of writing draws onthe natural storytelling skills of students, it also helps them gain perspective on their

19

27

I

personal experiences and find the form and wordswith which to share this understanding with others.

The best writers orient readers to the incident,present the scene and other people who werepresent, and then tell an engaging story that mayinclude dialogue, movement or gestures, names ofpeople or objects, and sensory details. Writersdescribe their remembered feelings, understand-ings, or reflections at the time of the incident; andthey may also evaluate the incident from theirpresent perspective, implying or stating its signifi-cance in their lives. The best writers use many ofthese strategies, selecting those appropriate to thewriting situation. The challenge in writing autobio-graphical incidents is both to select the appropriatestrategies from among this varied repertoire and tointegrate them smoothly into a readable personalstory. Writing engaging autobiographical incidentsis as demanding as writing convincing argumentsJr insightful analyses of literature.

Autobiographical incident prepares students todo other types of writing. As students realize thevalidity of their own experiences, they can usepersonal anecdotes as persuasive evidence insupport of their ideas. Some of the most convinc-ing expository essays are those that draw onpersonal experience tu support and developgeneralizations. In fiction, the ideas for stories andcharacters are often found in one's own experi-ences. As students learn to use their own lives andtheir daily experiences as a resource for writing,they enrich all of their writing.

Writing Tasks

In the April, 1987, statewide test, studentsreceived one of five writing tacks centered onautobiographical incident. Each task focused on aparticular type of remembered incident: a chal-lenge at which they succeeded or failed, somethingspecial that happened once, a time when they werefrightened, a memorable first experience, or asmall incident that in retrospect seems significant.

Each task invited students to write about asingle incident which occurred on one day or partof a day. They were encouraged to tell a livelystory about this incident for specific readersmentioned in the writing task. They were remindedthat their readers would expect them to reflect onthe personal significance of the incident.

20 Writing Achievement: A First Look

Achievement in Autobiographical Incident

Chart 4-1 summarizes the achievement ofCalifornia gra& eight students in writing autobio-graphical incidents. Nearly 50 percent could tell areadable story with a point, but only 14 percentcould write an engaging, memorable story throughdiverse narrative strategies. Stories personal andfictionalwere a familiar genre to thirteen-year-olds. Nearly all students read autobiography andprose fiction. All students experience storiesrepeatedly in nonprint mediamovies and TVdramas. From this experience with vistal narra-tives, all students share a common basis forlearning to write shaped, dramatic autobiographi-cal incidents. To have any hope of fulfilling thispromise, however, students must read and rereadmini narrativespublished autobiography. Theyneed to discuss with their teachers the features andstrategies of autobiography, and they must writeand revise their own personal stories.

Sample Essays

Score Point 6: Exceptional AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 6Feature (Coherence): 6Conventions: 6

2 percent of the studentsachieved this score.

This student writes about a deer huntingincident, a time when he first killed an animal. Hekeeps the focus on a single incident of shortduration, working out in considerable detail thenarrative and scenic possibilities of the incident.Through opening dialogue he successfully orientsreaders to the incident. The essay is well-paced andillustrates control of many of the features of a well-told autobiographical narrative: concrete visualdetails (sounds and smells); imagery, specificnarrative action (movements of the narrator anddeer); engaging beginning; and successful closure.The scene is vividly presented. At the end thewriter comments on the significance of the inci-dent.

Although an experienced reader can readilysee other possibilities in this incident, this first-draft essay is a masterful performance for a youngwriter. The writer has learned how to present hisremembered experiences thoughtfully and vividly.

2844

I

Score Point

Chart 4-1Achievement in Autobiographical Incident

Percentage ofCaliforniaGrade 8

Students*

Cumula-tive

Percent

6 2.0 2.0ExceptionalAchievement

5 11.8 13.8CommendableAchievement

4 32.3 46.1AdequateAchievement

3 34.9 81.0Some Evidenceof Achievement

2 15.1 96.1Limited Evidenceof Achievement

1 2.4 99.5Minimal Evidenceof Achievement

No Response 02

Off Topic 03

*This column does not total to 100% because of rounding.

Description of Achievement

The student produces coherent, dramatically realizednarrative which relies on a variety of appropriatestrategies; successfully orients readers by presentingcontext, scene, and people; states or impliessignificance of the incident.

The student. produces coherent, engaging narrativewhich successfully orients readers; states or impliessignificance of the 'cident; lacks insight and range ofstrategies of the writer of a 6.

The student produces a well-told incident that lacks themomentum and interest of a 5 or 6; orients readersadequately; states or implies significance but usuallyadds it to the end of the narrative.

The student produces narrative that is brief or rambling;limited statement or implication of signifcance.

The student produces general or fragmentary narrativewith little if any orientation or reflection onsignificance.

The student responds to prompt but with only the hintof a narrative.

His control of narrative, pace, movement, andcoherence is impressive. He can shift gracefullyfrom moving the narrative forward to presentingthe scene. His syntactic versatility and control ofconventions would be the envy of many universityfreshmen.

Not Titled

"This your first time huntin ?" asked my oldercousin Mark, as he pulled the two 9 mm rifles out of

the back of his black Toyota truck."Yep. Grandpa just brught me a license two

days ago," I replied as I pulled on the tancamoflauge vest I was holding in one hand.

"Alright then. I'll have to explain to you somedetails on how to hurt deer," he said, reaching overto me and stuffing a i, .,.x of bullets into one of myvest pockets.

Mark proceeded to explain in lengthy detail onhow to hunt deer. He also explained how to load,aim, and fire the gun. "Let's go!" He said when he

29Autobiographical Incident 21

1

finished, and closed up the back of his track. "Whenwe enter the woods, we can't talk. I don't want totake any chances on scaring some prey."

I started into the woods, the first rays ofmorning poking up behind the purplish-coloredmountains. I soon found an animal path leading inan east-west direction. I decided to follow it. Smallanimal tracks led this way and that along the trail,which disappeared ahead among the trees. I couldsmell evergreen, refreshing my senses and makingmyself glad that civilization had not yet reached thisplace.

The trail wound on, through patches of brushand a glade of small redwoods. I could hear thesounds of We everywhere, the birds chirping, thesquirrels scampering above in the foilage, and acow mooing somewhere close by.

Then the trail opened up into a meadow. Iquickly hid myself among the trees at the edge of theclearing and examined it for deer.

I couldn't see any deer, just trailers of mistbeing drawn along by an invisible hand. The knee-high grass waved back and forth in a light breeze,making a pleasant rustling sound.

I was taking in the beauty of this place when asaw a movement in the grass. I slowly unslung mygun from my shoulder and aimed it at where I sawthe movement. An agonizing two minutes later, thehead of a deer poked up, its black nose sniffing fordanger and its eyes darting around.

I slowly pulled the trigger, feeling the cold ironagainst my finger. Then, the gun kicked backagainst my shoulder, and a loud roar filled the air. Isaw the deer's head snap back, and I saw its legscrumple beneath the weight of the now lifeless body.

I put my gun up against a young sapling, and iwalked out into the meadow to look at my prize.Upon arriving where the deer lay, my wholeattitude about hunting changed. I now saw theanimal's glazed over eyes, staring out at the forestit would never see again. Clots of blood slowlyoozed from the hole the bullet had made in its head.The nose that quivered was now still. The life of .4?deer had been discharged just as the bullet hadbeen discharged from the gun.

It was the first time I had taken the life of ananimal, and I doubt that I will do it again for along, long time.

Score Point 5: Commendable AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 5Feature (Coherence): 5Conventions: 5

22 Writing Achievement: A First Look

12 percent of the studentsachieved this score.

This student writes about the first time sherode a bicycle. Beginning very successfully, shetells an engaging, readable story about herself, astory that includes dialogue and action. Unlike thewriter of the 6 essay, she does not develop thedramatic possibilities of her successful ride or givereaders a good sense of a specific scene.

The errors are typical of first-draft writing anddo not detract from the rhetorical effectiveness ofthe essay.

Not Titled

The wind blew the hair and the sweat off myface. I wiggled back and forth on the tiny seat. Myknuckles were turning whi21 from clenching sotightly to the handlebars. Then I fell off.

It was Christmas day as I struggled to climbback on my shiny new "big kid" two wheel bike.

I couldn't believe it! I actually had balancedmyself on the bike for at least thirty seconds!

My mom came running down the street askingme if I was hurt. Just for a little symathy I said yesand forced a couple of tears down my cheek. Thatreally got to my mom. She swooped me up into herarms and carried me back to the house, leaving thebicycle in the middle of the street.

She put me down on the couch and startedarguing with my dad. She was saying things like "Iknew we shouldn't have bought that bike, my babyis to little to ride it. She has already hurt herself."

I didn't hear my dads side of the story becauseI was already outside picking up my bike. It washard, but I managed to push it to the top of the hill.

I turned the bike around so it was facing thehill going downward and I climed on.

There I was, sitting on top of the world, justlike in my dreams. I put my right foot on one petal,and my left foot on the other, and I was of)? It wasso exciting! I loved every second of it. When Ieventually reached the bottom of the hill, I turnedright around and when back up. Then I went downagain, and again, and again. By this time my momand dad were standing on the lawn in fror.tof ourhome.

They both had expressions on their faces. Mydads was proud, and my mom's was a little moreworried. But deep down, I /mew she was as proud ofme as I was of myself And I was quite proud ofmyself

From that Christmas when I was seven yearsold to the Christmas I was twelve years old, theybike was my best friend!

30

The Christmas I was twelve, I got my ten-speedbike. And the story starts all over again.

! still have both bikes today, but my first one isin the attic waiting for my little cousin to grow in it.

Score Point 4: Adequate AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 4Feature (Coherence): 4Conventions: 5

32 permit of the studentsachieved this score.

This student writes about failing to meet achallenge. Although she reflects at length on thesignificance of the incident, she does not present aspecific scene or develop the dramatic possibilitiesof the incident. The narration is flat and general.

A Challenge

A few weeks ago I was in a trak meet. It was achallenge for me. I was always used to being thebest. This trak meet proved to me that I can't bebest at everything.

I was excited and scared. All those people cameout to watch. ! began to visialize myself beinghumiliated and laughed at. What V tripped? Whatif I was the last one to finish? I didn't have muchsupport. Only a few of my friends were there. ! sawmy competition and began having doubts aboutwhether I could still be the best. When we began, Iwas numb. I tried my hardest to get ahead. Theperson to my right was so close that I didn' 1 haveroom to break ahead of her. Then we crossed thefinish line. !t was over. I got third place. ! thinkback now, and I can't help wondering that f thatgirl had gotten out of my way, would I have come in

first? At first, I was disappointed. ! wasn't bestanymore and that there were others better than Iwas. At running anyway. I felt that I had failed tomeet my goal. Now, a week later, I think back andrealize that I can't be perfect. I realized that therewas still room for improvement. I'm just proud ofthe fact that I had enough guts to go through withthe race, and I tried my best. That's all I can ask ofmyself. I hope there are more challenges in myfuture and I hope I will be able to meet most ofthem. Challenges bring excitement .0-1 my life andshow me what I have to improve in. This test was achallenge. This one I met.

Score Point 3: Some Evidence of AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 3Feature (Coherence): 3Conventions: 4

35 percent of the studentsachieved this score.

This student writes about the first time heachieved something memorable. There is context,narrative, commentary, and closure. Readers areprepared for concrete action (walking onto the mat,blowing a whistle, diving for the opponent's legs)but are then denied it.

This writer and the writer of the previous essaycould benefit immediately from instruction inautobiographical writing. They have a sense ofstory but lack the strategies to present one vividlyto readers. Both writers have better control ofconventions than of rhetorical strategies, a recur-ring result in this assessment.

The First Time

The first time I won a first place medal forwrestling I was in the eight grade. My parents hadcome to watch me. ! had won seconds before butthis time I wanted the first. ! won all of my mathesand worked my way into the finals. I had made itagain and this time I was going to win. My oppo-nent was shorter than me and ! felt I had an edge.When I walked on to g--a- mat ! felt nervous and alittle shaky. The wistle blew and I dove for his legs,and in the end came out with more points. I hadwon! ! was proud of my self and so were myparents. I won the gold medial that is now hangingon my wall. Now this summer rm going to go to awrestling camp so ! can have that feeling moreoften. The feeling of being strong, the feeling ofbeing a winner!

Score Point 2: Little Evidence of AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 2Feature (Coherence): 1Conventions: 2

15 percent of the studentsachieved this score.

Writing about an incident that frightened him,this student is unable to follow through on a strongbeginning. Although the action can be followed,

31Autobiographical Incident 23

coherence is shaky. And errors detract from thenarrative's effectiveness.

Not Titled

Well one day , a couple of years ago, I askedmy mom if I could go to my friends house, and shesaid yes you may but be home by 5:00 pm. I wasriding my bike down the road and I ran over a rattlesnake. It was a Diamond back I thought that it wasbad luck to run over any animal on a bicycle. But Ikept on going.

Later on my way home I had to cross thehighway and when I did a car came speeding downthe road and almost hit me, it missed me by aboutone foot or less. I crashed and cut my arm and onefingernail came close to comeing of so I went homeas fast as I could and my mom took me to thehospital and they gave me a shot to make it stophurting and that bandaged me up and when I washealed, I never was that careless again.

Score Point 1: Minimal Evidence of AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 1Feature (Coherence): 1Conventions: 2

3 percent of the studentsachieved this score.

This student does not focus on a single memo-rable first experience. There is only the hint of astory for the dog-bite incident, and sentence errorscause readers to stumble. This essay is centered onthe topic but does not show that the writer under-stands narration.

First Experiences

I go my first experience riding, a bicycle, it wasfun until r fell and hurt my self, then I tried again, Idid it! Tien when I was nine I got bitten by a dog itwas a experience, my whole right hand wasbleeding, raned home. When I was twelve the dogthat bit me died at the school.

24 Writing Achievement: A First Look

Teachers' Comments on Achievement onAutobiographical Incident

California classroom teachers wrote commentslike the following after reading thousands ofautobiographical-incident essays during thesummer, 1987:

Kids need to work on engaging openings andselecting appropriate details. They need to takerisks.

I am reminded how important it is for students toidentify a rich incident, develop it as fully aspossible, and gracefully integrate narration andreflection.

Students need instruction on writing as a processand on how to incorporate 'show, not tell' tech-niques so that incidents are livelier. They should bemade aware of authentic voice in their writing.

I can help my students improve their story lines andavoid digressions.

I was impressed with the quality of writing of manyof the students. They had such diverse styles andunique ways of expressing themselves. With a littleguidance, writers of the weaker papers have thepotential to improve.

The best papers continue to demonstrate what we allknow about autobiography: concreteness, specific-ity and careful focus are important and can betaught. Scoring the papers has sharpened myunderstanding of "incident"

I will be more direct in my instruction of what anincident is (in terms of short, concentrated durationof time); I will also continue to stress diversenarrative approaches.

We have taught many students to write papers thatare "correct" but they are dull to the point of tears. Ibelieve, though, that eighth graders can learn towrite well, not just adequately.

32

Chapter 5

Writing Assessment: Evaluation

Evaluators make judgments about the worth of a subject (a book, movie, restaurant,musical group) and then support their judgment with reasons, attempting to convincethe reader of the soundness of the judgment. They may support their evaluations bothby means of personal anecdote and external knowledge and authority, drawing on whatthey read and what other people say about a subject.

Making evaluations is a common experience in an adult's life. Every day weevaluate a wide range of subjects. For example, we evaluate the way we feel when wewake up and the way we look when dressed for work. We may also evaluate competingcandidates for political office, controversial issues of national importance, the worth ofcertain consumer products, or different vacation spots. Our soundest judgments arebased on criteria appropriate to the subject.

In evaluative writing grade eight students are asked to go beyond their immediateand perhaps superficial reactions to a given subject. Students consider possible criteriaon which to base an evaluation, analyze their subjects in light of the criteria, and selectevidence that clearly supports their judgments. The demands of working out a thought-ful written evaluation provide students with practice in confronting the increasinglycomplex choices in their lives.

Growing toward adulthood, students will be faced with making significant evalu-ative decisionswhether to go to college, what job to take, where to live. Exploringdecisions in writing can help writers to focus on several aspects of evaluating a situ-ation before they make a final decision. The processes to be learned through writingeffective evaluation, then, go far beyond a classroom essay; they have lifelong implica-tions.

Writing Tasks

In the April, 1987, statewide test, students wrote an essay for one of three writingtasks. For each task students were asked to identify something they especially liked andto say why they liked it.

25

33

In one task students were asked to write aletter to a favorite author telling why they espe-cially liked one of the author's books. In anothertask students were askei to write an essay explain-ing why they enjoyed one television program morethan any others. And in the third task students wereasked to write an essay justifying their preferencefor a particular type of music.

All the writing tasks identified particularreaders: a teacher, local television station staff, afavorite author. The tasks emphasized that studentsmust give reasons and evidence to support theirjudgments about their favorite authors, TV pro-grams, or music. The tasks made clear that stu-dents must argue convincingly for their prefer-ences and not just offer unsupported opinions.

In the April, 1988, assessment, students wereasked to evaluate unfamiliar poems as well asother literary works assigned in their Englishclasses.

Achievement in Evaluation

Chart 5-1 summarizes the achievement ofgrade eight students in evaluation. Nearly allstudents understand that an evaluation requires ajudgment. Many students understand, as well, thatgiving a reason is the first step in making anargument. Everyday conversational argumentswith parents of friends involve asserting judgmentsand giving reasons. Tile essentials of writtenevaluations, howeversupport or evidence for areasoned argument justifying a judgmentseem tobe understood by only 35 percent of the studentstested, those scoring 6, 5, or 4. Very few students(only 9 percent) can write a developed, coherent,engaging evaluation.

Sample Essays

Score Point 6: Exceptional AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 6Feature (Coherence): 5Conventions: 6

0.5 percent of the studentsachieved this score:

Although a novel beginning is not essential tosuccess in an evaluation essay, one has to beimpressed by the confidence of a thirteen-year-oldwriter who can, in a timed test, begin with dialogue

26 Writing Achievement: A First Look

and anecdote. This essay illustrates, incidentally,how narrative strategies developed through auto-biographical writing can be useful in argumenta-tive or persuasive writing. Although the subject ofthis evaluation is not known at once, it soonbecomes known as the writer segues gracefullyfrom anecdote to judgment. The writer gives tworeasons why she favors rock musicit helps hermanage her feelings and it presents appealing mes-sages. She supports the first of th.;;:e reasons withan anecdote, and the second with an example. Theessay is coherent, even with the risks it takesrhetorically, and it demonstrates near mastery ofconventions.

Rock Around the Clock

"Well, you're getting to the age when you haveto learn to be responsible!" my mother yelled out.

"Yes, but I can't be available all the time to domy appointed chores! I'm only thirteen! I want to bewith my friends, to have fun! I don't think that it isfair for me to baby-sit while you go run your littleerrands!" I snapped back. I sprinted upstairs to myroom before my mother could start another sen-tence. I turned on my radio and "Shout" wasplaying.: noted how true the song was and I threwsome punches at my pillow. The song ended and"Control" , by Janet Jackson came on. Halfwaythrough the song, I stopped beating my pillow. Isuddenly felt at peace with myself. The song hadslowed me down. I pondered briefly over all thesongs that had helped me to control my feelings.The list was endless. So is my devotion to rockmusic and pop rock. These songs help me to expressmy feelings, they make me wind down, and aboveall they make me feel good Without this music, Imight have turned out to be a violent and grumpyperson.

Some of my favorite songs are by HowardJones, Pet Shop Boys, and Madonna. I especiallylike songs that have a message in them, such as"Stand By Me ", by Ben E. King. This song tells meto stand by the people I love and to not questionthem in times of need. Basically, this song is tellingme to believe in my friends, because they are myfriends.

My favorite type of music is rock and pop rock.Without them, there i., no way that I could survivementally. They are with me in times of trouble, and,best of all, they are only a step away.

34

Score Point

6

ExceptionalAchievement

5

CommendableAchievement

4AdequateAchievement

3

Some Evidence ofAchievement

2

Limited Evidenceof Achievement

Chid 5-1Achievement in Evaluation

Percentage of Cumula-California five

Grade 8 Students Percentage Description of Achievement

0.5 The student produces convincingly argued evaluation; identifiesa subject, describes it appropriately, and asserts a judgment ofit; gives reasons and specific evidence to support the argument;engages the reader immediately, moves along logically andcoherently, and provides closure; reflects awareness of reader'squestions or alternative evaluations.

8.1 8.6 The student produces well-argued evaluation; identifies,describes, and judges its subject; gives reasons and evidence tosupport the argument; is engaging, logical, attentive toreader's concem;is more conventional or predictable than thewriter of a 6.

253 34.1 The student produces adequately argued evaluation; identifiesand judges its subject; gives at least one moderately developedreason to support the argument; lacks the authc.ity and polishof the writer of a 5 or 6; produces writing that, althoughfocused and coherent, may be uneven; usually describes thesubject more than necessary and argues a judgment less thannecessary.

42.4 76.5 The student states a judgment and gives one or more reasons tosupport it; either lists reasons without providing evidence orfails to argue even one reason logically or coherently.

19.2 95.7 The student states a judgment but may describe the subjectwithout evaluating it or may list irrelevant reasons or developa reason in a rambling, illogical way.

1 3.6 993

Minimal Evidenceof Achievement

No Response

Off Topic

03

0.5

*This column does not total to 100% because of rounding.

The student usually states a judgment but may describe thesubject without stating a judgment; either gives no reasons orlists only one or two reasons without providing evidence;usually relies on weak and general personal evaluation.

Score Point 5: Commendable AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 5Feature (Coherence): 6Conventions: 6

8.1 percent of the studentsachieved this score.

Although this essay opens and closes confi-dently (if repetitively), it does not give much

35Evaluation 27

1

evidence to support its judgment. The writer tellsus that he values television programs offered bythe Public Broadcasting System because they areinformative, refers to two specific shows ("Nova"and "Newton's Apple"), mentions one episode of"Nova," but then stops short of providing concreteevidence from one or more episodes to illustratethe basis for his judgment. Still, this essay rankshigh. It includes examples and contrasts, and itsuse of language is impressive.

Not Titled

I do a lot of television watching, and basically Iwatch shows that are adventurous, educational, andscientific shows that explore and lead me to newdiscoveries that take place everyday in the fields ofcomputer technology and science. I like to beinformed of these things Mat affect us very much inthe everyday world So I often tune to PBS forprograms that cover these things. Nova, forexample, is a show that explores the wonder oftechnology. There was an episode that I really likedThat particular episode discussed how specialeffects are made in movies such as Star Wars andIndiana Jones, interesting things I never knew

before. Another program on the sai-.: channel,Newton's Apple, which consisted of questions andanswers, facts. The same series range from spaceexploradons, computers to the law of relativity. Afeature of its episode is that they take us back intime to see the inventions that never went into use.

I like these shows because they are alwaysinteresting and educational. A lot of other showsusually feature comedy, sex and violence. I do notget total enjoyment from these shows. Rather thanwatching these programs that do not add to myknowledge, I would watch shows like Nova,Newtons Apple and other shows PBS has to offerthat open up my mind.

Score Point 4: Adequate AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 4Feature (Coherence): 5Conventions:

25.5 percent of the studentsachieved this score.

This essay's opening and closing frame iteffectively. The writer mentions several reasons

.for liking "Miami Vice" but provides evidence for

28 Writing Achievement: A First Look

only one reasonclothing styles. The writercontrasts two characters and writes enthusiasti-cally.

Friday Night Television

Today is Friday. What's on T.V.? As I flipthrough the T.V. guide I see all the listings of all thedays. Now I'm on the section marked Friday. Fromseven o'clock to nine o'clock there isn't much on.Hey! Wait a second! Look, at ten o' clock MiamiVice is on. I love that show! You want to know why?Well it's the style of the show. It has a certainfashion of clothes that each character wears. Like,one character, Sonny Crockett. He wears whitecotton pants or any light wearing, light. coloredpants. Then theres a terquois or pink, light pink,shirt along with a sports' jacket.

Ricardo Tubbs on the other hand wears two-piece suits. His colors are itsually dark blue, black,and tan. Tubbs wears jwelery. Necklaces to beexact. His best one is a small chain that has acharm hanging form it that says EGOT. That standsfor Emily, Graney, Oscar, and Tony.

The show is packed full of action. Usually itrevolves around cocain dealers. Crockett and Tubbsare plain clothed cop out to get them all. Sometimesthe show is quite serious and other times it is funny.But what rally makes Miami Vice are the actors.

Well,1 wonder what I'm going to watchtonight. Maybe I'll watch Miami vice!

Score Point 3: Some Evidence of AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 3Feature (Coherence): 4Conventions: 5

.14_2.4

percent of the studentsachieved this score.

The writer expresses a judgment about a TVshow ("Moonlighting"), but he only lists reasonswithout arguing any of them with evidence orexamples. There are more generalizations (TV isfunny, sad, happy, humorous) than illustrations.Although it is brief, however, the essay is focused,coherent, and purposeful. It reveals the rudimentsof evaluation.

36

My Favorite Television Program

I

Almost all the world watches Television. It hasbecome a past time for me. I enjoy watchingtelevision because some of it can be funny, somecan be sad, some can be happy. Of all the televisionprograms I watch, my favorite is a show called"Moonlighting ". It is a show about two people whorun a detective ar Jncy. Their names are DavidAddison and Maddie Hayes. Their lifestyles arecompletely different. She is well-mannered. He isimmature. I have a particularly favorite episode.They have to find a missing dead body!!

That particular episode was very.fwmy. I liketo watch T.V. shows with humor in it. Moonlightingis a very good program. It has humor, suspense,murders, disappearances, and action. It is, in myopinion, the best show on television today.

Score Point 2: Limited Evidence of AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 2Feature (Coherence): 4Conventions: 2

19.2 percent of studentsachieved this score.

This writer offers only an implied judgment(The book was "fairly easy to read") and then onlyan implied argument. The writer summarizes thebook so handily that readers infer it must havebeen easy to read. And the writer relies on sum-mary rather than on explicit argument supported bycriteria-based masoning and evidence.

Not Titled

Dear Author

Just recently! have read a book. It was fairlyeasily to read this particular book was called "KickOf'. It was about a boy named Bradley but hisfriends call him Brad. Brad was from a foriegn landcalled England. Their Brad was a fabulous socarplayer. His mom and dad met in England also at aairport. Brads father was a airline pilot in the AirForce. Then at the age of ten Brad moved to theStates of the United States. At the age of ten hemoved to Miami Florida were he had no friends.Then his father got moved to Pineville. It was adesolate area it had lots of trees. When Brad gottheir he was bored so he climed a tree not knowing

his soccer ball was still on the ground. The peoplehe met were Christine and her brother. Theyweren't the best people aro-ind they were not nice.The neat thing you new is that they were trying totake Brads soccer bal. Then Christine gave Brad areal shiner. Brads parents wanted him to stay out oftrouble so they put him into football he playedfirststring, second, special team, then Beach. Thecoaches son wasn't making filgoals so he put Bradin and he made the goals. And they won thechampionship.

Score Point 1: Minimal Evidence of AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 1Feature (Coherence): 2Conventions: 2

3.6 percent of studentsachieved this score.

This writer does identify a subject (classicalrock) and makes a judgment about it. He also givesreasons but does not develop any of them.

Not Titled

My Favorite music is classical, rock. I like itbecause it coulms you down and you can enjoy it. Ialso can be enjoying when you have a party or justhave people over. When there's nothing to do justturn on the radio and relax such as read a book orgo to sleep. Also when you have a friend over youjust can turn the music on 2nd just play a game orwatch tv. That's why the music is made for.

Teachers' Comments on Achievement inEvaluation

California classroom teachers wrote comments likethese after reading thousands of evaluation essaysduring summer 1987:

I was pleased to see that so many teachers scoringessays with me crave evidence in students'evaluation papers. I was also pleased to see thatteachers hate to read generic papers.

Students generally need to develop skills in givingevidence to support their judgments. I plan tospend more time on these thinking skills nextyear.

37Evaluation 29

j

Writing evaluations, students need to know thatthey must use an active voice, take a firm stand,and then suppcat their stand. Wishywashiness isout!

Students need a lot of practice in a variety ofwriting types. They need careful and personalfeedback about their writing, and they needteachers who fully understand what ma!zcs acertain type of writing work and who can explainit to students.

Evidence of clear thinking was heavily rewardedin our scoring.

With evaluative writing, a plan is of utmostimportance. Those papers that fell short were theones with obviously no planning in the prewritingperiodwriting off the top of the head.

Sating how the scoring worked and using thescoring guide made me see that students need a lotof practice in a variety of writing, and they needteachers who fully understand what makes acertain type of writing work and are able toexplain it to students.

I think good evaluative writing is difficult evenfor good students. As I see it, most kids havetrouble doing more than just summarizing. Theyneed to learn to develop substantial reasoningbehind why they like or dislike something.

30 Writing Achievement A First Look

I still need to work with my students on rhetoricalstance, developing an awareness of one's audi-ence, and on voice.

I have already used a scoring rubric for majorwriting assignments like the term paper. Thescoring session convinced me to more widelyapply the rubric concept to a greater variety of myassignments and give the rubric to my students.

The scoring session deepened my conviction thatstudent texts need to be evaluated developmen-tally. We need to focus as much or more on theemergent (sometimes abortive) features of studentwriting as we do on the fully developed features.

I know good writing is damn difficult to do anddamn rare. I know kids need to practice it moreand see good models of evaluative essays in orderto do better.

I am struck by how much some students canaccomplish in 45 minutes; how well they cansometimes marshall the ideas; and with how muchflair and sparkle they can express themselves. Iam also struck with how superficial and vacuoussome of their reasoning is.

More emphasis should be placel on criticalthinking skills, supporting judgments, and tyingthoughts and ideas together. Far too many papersdigress, summarize, underdevelop, or state totallyirrelevant facts.

Chapter 6

Writing Assessment: Problem Solution

Problem solution asks the writer to define a problem, propose one or more solu-tions, and convince the reader of the feasibility of the solutions. In writing about aproblem and its solutions, students are inevitably drawn into cause-and-effect thinkingabout the history and consequences of the problem. They may have to argue that theproblem exists and is serious. Proposing a solution, students may need to narrate a step-by-step plan for implementing it. They must convince readers of the possibility of thesolution and perhaps even persuade them to act. In doing so, they must considerreaders' objections and weigh the merits of alternative solutions. In all these ways,problem solution provides grade eight students with an introduction to the complexitiesof argumentative writing. Any problem solution ezayeven one based on a familiarschool or community be a sustained and realistic exercise in problemsolving and critical thinking.

Engaging students in this kind of writing moves them toward analyzing problemsand evaluating solutions to problems in their own lives and toward becoming activeparticipants in resolving problems in their immediate communities.

Writing Tasks

In the April, 1987, statewide writing assessments, students responded to one ofthree writing tasks. Each task posed a familiar school problem and directed students topropose a solution to it for particular readers.

In one task students wrote a letter to a group of parents working to make schoollunches more appealing and nutritious. Students were asked to explain why moststuuents disliked the lunches and propose a solution to the problem. The task empha-sized the importance of convincirg parents to take the proposed solution seriously.

In another task students wrote a letter to the school principal suggesting a solutionto the problem of school litter. The principal had invited students to propose solutionsbecause he had been unsuccessful in solving the problem himself. Students were asked

31

39

to explain how the problem developed and why itseemed to them so difficult to solve. Then theywere instructed to propose a solution, show how itmight be implemented, and argue for its efficacy.The writing situation called for giving tactfuladvice to a reader who would be receiving manyalternative, competing solutions.

In the third task students wrote a letter to astudent council representative explaining whatstudents disliked about school dances and propos-ing a way to improve the dances. They wereencouraged to describe the solution so that thereader could see how it might be implemented andto argue convincingly that it was workable andsuperior to other possible solutions.

Achievement in Problem Solution

Chart 6-1 summarizes statewide achievementin writing essays to solve problems. Nearly allstudents recognize a problem solution writingsituation and can come up with some kind ofsolution to a problem. At least 40 percent ofstudents (those scoring 4, 5, or 6) know that asolution cannot merely be mentioned but must bedescribed and argued for. Only 10 percent ofstudents (scores of 5 and 6), however, are able todevelop extended, convincing arguments forsolutions, arguments reflecting continual aware-ness of readers' objections, preferences, andvalues. Problem solution, a remarkably reader-centered and action-oriented type of argument,challenges thirteen-year-olds to analyze theirreaders and develop an argumentative strategy thereaders will find convincing.

Sample Essays

Score Point 6: Exceptional AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 6Feature (Coherence): 5Conventions: 4

0.7 percent of the studentsachieved this score.

Although lapses in conventions occasionallydivert the reader, this essay reflects a comprehen-sive, thoughtful analysis of the rhetorical solution.The writer is especially sensitive both to her reader(the principal) and to those (like teachers andsports team members) who will be affected by her

32 Writing Achievement A First Look

proposed solutions. She successfully establishescommon ground with the principal, aligningherself perhaps too closely with his values; and yetshe sets out realistic solutions which will neverthe-less be a challenge for him to implement. Sheopens her letter very engagingly, forecasts herargument precisely, and then closes effectively.Although each of the tour solutions might havebeen described and argued more fully, this essay isimpressive. She dismisses an alternative solution(after-school detention) and throughout considersobjections w her own proposed solutions.

Litter

Dear Mr. Lucklow,

I am a concerned student wh-i is very upsetwith our school litter problem. I kn w you've triedmany times unsuccessfully to punish kids you'veseen littering by giving them after school detention.Everyday I tell the kids who I see littering to pick itup and throw it in the trash but they just say, "Ohdon't worry about it, a janitor will pick it up later."So if you are open for any suggestion on how toencourage the kids to put their wash in the trashcan, where it belongs, I would like to give you someof my suggestions. They are; to cut field trips,mention it on their report cards, keep tht kids youcatch littering from doing sports they are invo:vedwith, and to have more lunch duty people,

Now I know these ideas may seem a tittleextreme, but I think you should give it a try.

The suggestion about mentioning the litterproblem on their report cards may not be to great,but I think the parents might take a little moreconcern about the environment their kids work andplay in.

! know we don't take too many field trips,either, but the ones we take are really quiteinteresting and I know the kids really enjoy them. Ithink this solution and the one involving cuttingthem from their sport activities will be the mostsuccessful ones of which I have mentioned.

Now the one about kicking them off their sportactivity will not be nn a permanent basis, but if itwas. for a few weeks I think it would teach them alesson that would last for the whole year.

My suggestion about having more lunch dutypatrolers would mean more teachers wouldn't haveas long of break as usual, but if you explained thesituation to them I'm sure they would understandand could work out a schedule were they wouldonly have to patrol once or twice a week.

! hope you will take all of these suggestion to

40

Score Point

6ExceptionalAchievement

5CommendableAchievement

Adequ4ateAchievement

3Some Evidence ofAchievement

Percentage ofCalifornia

Grade 8 Students*

Limited Evidence ofAchievement

1Minimal Evidenceof Achievement

No Response

Off Topic

Chart 6-1Achievement in Problem Solution

Cumula-tive

Percentage Description of Achievement

0.7 The student describes the problem fully and argues for itsseriousness; argues convincingly for one or more solutions to aproblem; reflects continual awareness of readers' objectionsand preferred alternative solutions.

9.3 10.0 The student describes the problem adequately for intendedreaders and argues convincingly for at least one solution;reflects readers' concerns but without the continual readerawareness of the writer of a 6.

29.6 39.6 The student describes the problem briefly and offers at leastone relevant, moderately developed solution; may mention thereader in the beginning but usually does not mention the readeragain until the conclusion: is more matter of fact andnoticeably less convincing than the writer of a 5 or 6.

39.9

16.7

3.2

0.2

0.5

79.5

96.2

99.4

'This column does not total to 100% because of rounding.

The student identifies a problem and offers at least oneminimally developed solution; may mention readers butusually does not sex^ mmodate them.

The student =dons a problem and lists one or moresolutions without arguing for them; usually does not mentionreaders.

The student usually mentions a problem but may not identifyone explicitly; either does not offer a solution or mentionsone and does not argue for it or argues for it illogically;proposes a solution that may not seem appropriate forproblem; shows little or no awareness of readers.

your consideration and think about the pros andcons of each one. If you do like these suggestions, Iwas thinking of writing them in the school newspa-per. I know the students will probably be disap-pointed with some of these suggestions, but I thinkit wi make them take the problem of littering intoconsideration more than they have in the past.

I'm sure you will do your part in this problemand I will do mine by throwing away my trash andI'm sure my friends will too. I thank for your timein reading my letter.

Writing Assessment: Problem Solution 33

41

Score Point 5: Commendable AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 5Feature (Coherence): 5Conventions: 5

9.3 percent of the studentsachieved this score.

This focused, well-argued essay opens attrac-tively, keeps its focus, and closes appropriately.Instead of proposing an immediately practicablesolution, the writer calls for reforms to get at theroot of the problem. We can imagine a harriedprincipal admiring this reflective approach to apressing problem but doubting whether he or shecan wait until the proposed solution can be imple-mented.

Not Titled

Dear Mr. Luc/claw,

We have a serious problem here at out schooland that problem is litter. Lveryday I see my fellowstudents throw their soft-drink cans and half-eatenunwanted food wider the bleachers, to the side ofwalkways, or just anywhere they happen to be, nomatter how close to a garbag. can they are. Insome cases it has become a kind of game or contestto find the most unusual place for their trash, overlooking the most sensible place, the garbage can.

I think that the root of this problem is the allaround lack of pride that the students have in theschool. If they began, to think that the school was areflection of themselves, just as a home or room isareflection of themselves, perhaps they would beginto take a little bit more pride in their surroundings.Perhaps working to make its appearance present- .

ableOne way to acheive this sense of pride is to let

the students have an active roll in school desisionsthat affect them directly. That is, provide thestudents with the responsibility so that they knowthat if they don't keep the school clean it makesthem look irresponsible.

Desisions that the students could make forexample might be entertainment programs such astalent :haws and dances that are mostly for thestudent's benifit. Give them the things that theylike; i.e fruit juices and other items in the cafeteria,so that school is a place that they look forward togoing, not a place that they don't care about and donot want to go to.

9nce you have a system in which the studentsa faculty work hand in hand and student ideas are

34 Writing Achievement A First Look

given an equal chance then the faculty requests,like a clean campus will be taken seriously. I hopethat you consider the options I have presented toyou with all fairness, as I believe that they are thesolution to your problem.

Score Point 4: Adequate AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 4Feature (Coherence): 4Conventions: 4

29.6 percent of the studentsachieved this score.

Beginning and ending perfunctorily, thiswriter lists several suggestions for improvingschool dances but does not argue for any of themconvincingly. She misses an opportunity to empha-size the interrelatedness of her solutions, as achain-of-reasoning argument. The writer does,however, understand the rudiments of recommend-ing solutions to a problem for a particular reader.

Not Titled

Dear Stacy,

I am writing you this letter to give my feelingson the school dances. I feel there is many things wecan do to improve our dances since many studentshave been complaining about the dances lately. Ifeel if we all work together we can make the dancesbetter.

Many students want the dances to start at alater time so they can have time to go home and getready. Having the dances right after school makesthat kind of hard and I think longer dances wouldpersuade more students to come so they could havea longer time to socialize and dance. A hour and ahalf is really too short of a time. I also thinkweneed more dances. If we had a dance once a monthit would give the studerts a much better chance tomake it to the dances.

We need to try to get mime people to come tothe dances. I think by maybe having raffles andpublicizing the dances more it would attract morestudents. Free refreshments might be a little tokento add in there and tell the DJ. to listen to more ofthe students request because it seem like he playsthe musk he wants to listen to.

These are just some of my suggestions toimprove the dances. Theres probably a few morethings we can do to improve them and I'm sure ifwe all work together we can.

42

Score Point 3: Some Evidence of AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 3Feature (Coherence): 3Conventions: 2

39.9 percent of the studentsachieved this score.

Although readers (parents) are addressed inthis essay, they are not really considered seriously.The problem of unattractive cafeteria food isdramatized with the anecdote of the poisonedstudent, but the remainder of the essay fails torealize this promising beginning. The solutions arenot convincing because they are unrealistic.

Not Tided

Dear Parents,

The kids of our school don't like the food here,because the food don't taste good. It's greasy,burned, & also has wierd things in it, that ourschool calls meat. Certain kid say they felt sickafter one of the meals. He went home sick & didn'tcome back for a week. We all wondered whathappened to him. We later found out he waspoisoned. He came out ok but he told the kids whathappened and there all afraid to eat in our lunch-room. That's why they go to our local stores forfood & candy.

I suggest that you protest, & demand to knowthe company who we get our food from & demandth our school will stop ordering from thatc.n..pany & start from another. If they deny yourrequest take your kids out of cur school & put themin another until they will change the food company.Another thing they can do is put fancier ontreis ontheir. Maybe some candy or other things like icecream, cake, or maybe even pie. This will get thekids attention & they will forget about the foodpoisoning thing & start to buy the lunches that arestill nutritous bu:, also have some sweets in it.

I hope you will pick on of these suggestions soour kids from our school will start to eat lunchinstead of wasting it on candy. If you pick one ofthe suggestions & the kids don't come to school oreat in are lunchroom we will have to close theschool down.

Score Point 2: Limited Evidence of AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 2Feature (Coherence): 3Conventions: 2

16.7 percent of the studentsachieved this score.

This essay identifies a problem and proposes asolution, but neither is developed.

Not Titled

Stacey Green

Our school dances are too short and no onecan dance long enough to even get tired. Theprincipal won't make them any longer because hethinks that someone will get int a fight.

T m afraid to talk to him because he is not thekind of person to give suggestions to, so l' ll giveyou some now. I think we can make the dances goat least to 10:00 pm and that will give us some timeto dance.

I also think maybe we can make them startearlier. Maybe at 6:00 pm to 9:00 pm. I hope wecan work something out

Score Point 1: Minimal Evidence of AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 1Feature (Coherence): 2Conventions: 1

[32 percent of the studentsachieved at this score.

This writer can only echo the problem in thesolution: small meals should be bigger.

Not Titled

Dear Parents

I know you are conserved about the studentsmeals in our school Cafeteria.

The reason why in over cafeteria is cause it'snot good, the meals we have are not big enough. Ithink you should give us biger meals. This is theonly way to slove the solution we have

Writing Assessment Problem Solution 35

Teachers' Comments on Achievement inProblem Solution

California classroom teachers wrote comments likethese after reading thousands of problem solutionessays during the summer, 1987:

Problem solution is directly applicable to real life.All thinking adults need to be able to think aproblem through and write logically about it.

I'm going to work on making sure my studentsaddress the problem, think imaginatively aboutsolutions, and argue convincingly for their solu-tions.

I see endless possibilities for this type of writing inother areas: social studies, math, science.

The all-purpose five-paragraph form is not the wayto approach this type of writing. Students must beencouraged to take on the problem and really try tosolve it.

Students need to write on a variety of topics to avariety of audiences.

I think the scoring session taught the value ofteaching brainstorming and mapping. A clear, well-organized response can be very pedestrian. Brain-

36 Writing Achievement: A First Look

storming helps students find lively ideas. Organiza-tion with little content is deadly.

I learned exactly what a 6 is: highly developed,oriented to readers, etc., so I'll be teaching moredirectly to that goal.

The scoring session gave me an opportunity to see awide range of student writing with which tocompare my students' writing. It did reaffirm mycommitment to instruction in the process of writing.

Eighth graders need more instruction and practice inwriting. They also need individual responses fromteachers and small student groups.

Kids need more practice in debating issues; theyoften don't know how to argue a point of view.

This type of writing, problem solution, is applicableto social studies. It is especially relevant to issuesinvolving constitutional rights.

To do well with this type of writing, kids need to beshown what is expected and how to accomplish it.

I'm going to work on making sure students addressthe problem, think clearly about solutions, and bringabout good conclusions.

44

1

Chapter 7

Writing Assessment: Report ofInformation

Report of information makes special demands of writers. They roast presentthemselves as authorities on a subject, seeking to impress readers with their knowledgeand understanding. They select and present enough specific details of a subject tocharacterize it for readers. They orient readers to a subject, keep them on track with acoherent report, and then close the essay in a satisfying way. The best reports ofinformation go still further to express the writer's involvement with the subject andcommitment to sharing it with readers. The best reports also have a controlling idea,which provides coherence and focus for the essay.

Report of information is sometimes called =Dian= or expository writing. Itinvolves the full range of writer's strategies for presenting information: anecdotalnarration, process narration, description, illustration, definition, classification, andcomparison/contrast. Because it has no inherent logic (like argument), it makes specialdemands on writers for organizing informationfor finding a workable plan *-) informreaders efficiently. The writer must steadily consider how much readers already knowon the topic and at what rate and by what means new information can be introduced.Writers must also provide all the obvious cues readers require to stay on track as theypmcess unfamiliar informationcues like forecasting and transitions.

In reporting information, writers are concerned primarily with informing ratherthan persuading readers to take action, justifying judgments or opinions, or presentingautobiographical disclosures. We find reports of information in textbooks, researchreports, technical manuals, and newspapers and magazines. We also find them in lettersand essays presenting information about familiar activities and places. Reporting infor-mation encompasses much of the reading and writing students will do in school andcollega and on the job.

37

45

1

Writing Tasks

In the April, 1987, assessment, students wereassigned one of four writing tasks within report ofinformation. Each task required students to presentschool or c _.nmunity information to particularreaders. For example, they were asked to describetheir hometowns to friends of the same age whowere moving to the towns, detail the activities of afavorite class for Canadian students, introduce afavorite activity to other students unfamiliar withthe activity, or describe their schools to friends ofthe same age who were transferring to the schools.

All tasks emphasized presenting a subjectcomprehensively and concretely in order to informreaders. Although the information writers neededcame from personal experience, they were nottempted to write autobiography and they were notasked to narrate personally significant incidents.Although they wrote about favorite activities andclasses, as in evaluation writing tasks, they werenot encouraged to convince readers to accept thewriter's judgment that the activities and classeswere better than all others; instead, they were en-couraged simply to describe the activities andclasses.

In the April, 1988, assessment, report ofinformation writing tasks also directed students toexplain school learning to particular readers.

Achievement in Reporting of Information

Chart 7-1 summarizes the achievement ofgrade eight students in the writing of informativereports. Fifty-one percent of students (thosescoring 6, 5, or 4) have learned that to inform areader about a subject they must elaborate, exem-plify, and describe, not just list main points orfeatures. Because students were sharing informa-tion gained from personal experience aboutfamiliar subjects inviting endless elaboration,essays scored 4, although revealing some effort toelaborate, were surprisingly brief. Only 20 percentof students (those scoring 5 or 6) seem to movereadily from general to specificfrom main ideasto elaborations. To be informed, readers needexamples and concrete details. Without them,attention wanders and no learning is possible.Strategies of elaborationnarrating activities,listing steps in a process, defining, giving ex-amples, pmviding visual details, comparing orcontrasting, and making analogiesare familiar to

38 Writing Achievement A First Look

students as readers and can be readily added totheir writing repertoires.

Sample Fssays

Score Point 6: Exceptional AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 6Feature (Elaboration): 6Conventions: 6

4.1 percent of the studentsachieved this score.

Like all the other 6 essays in this report, thisone could certainly be improved after discussionby a small group of students or a conference withthe student's English teacher. For a time-limited,first-draft essay, however, it exemplifies excep-tional achievement. The writer announces her topicearly ("German . . . class"), provides context(language study at Egan Junior High School), andnever loses focus. She frames the essay verysuccessfully in paragraphs one and six by placingher German class in the larger school context.

The essay is authoritative and coherent and ismasterfully organized. It moves from generalinformation about topics of study and daily recur-ring activities to specific information about Thurs-day dialogues. The paragraph breaks are func-tional. Most important, the writer provides enol/ghconcrete information so that readers feel ade-quately informed about this particular Germanclass. The fifth paragraph illustrates best thiswriter's achievement in elaborating one point in asatisfying way: idorming readers (Canadianstudents) about Thursday dialogues, the writerdetails specific activities (dictation, translation,tapes, grading) and enumerates their frequency.

Although the opening and closing includebrief statements of evaluation ("most interestingclass" and "there isn't a better German class andteacher), the writer does not argue for a judgment(as in evaluation). Instead, the writer reports onactivities in one German class, detailing them fullyenough for students elsewhere to know howstudents spend their time in this one class.

Not Titled

At our school, Egan Jr. High we can choose alanguage, Spanish, French, or German for one of

46

Chart 7-1Achievement in Report of Information

Percentage ofCalifornia

Score Point Grade S Students

6ExceptionalAchievement

5CommendableAchievement

4AdequateAchievement

3Some Evidence ofAchievement

Cumula-tive

Percentage Description of Achievement

4.1 The student presents substantial amounts of specific, concreteinformation which is focused and organized impressively;relies on a variety of strategies for presenting information;provides readers a context for the subject; concludes in asatisfying way; reveals enthusiasm for the subject andauthority in writing about it.

14.8 18.9 The student presents specific information although less thanthe writer of a 6, that is focused and well-organized; relies ona variety of strategies for presenting information; begins andends effectively; reveals his or her enthusiasm and authority.

32.3 51.2 The student presents specific information, as much as a 5, butLsually more general than specific and not as well organized asa 5 or 6; usually begins effectively but may end clumsily;reveals interest in the subject but reflects less authority thanthe writer of a 5 or 6.

32.5 83.7 The student presents either limited information or. adequateinformation poorly organized; usually relies more on generalstatements, opinion, or evaluation than on specificinformation.

2Limited Evidence of

12.3

Achievement

Minimal Evidenceof Armovernpnt

No Response

Off Topic

2.6

0.2

0.6

96.0 The student presents information that is brief and shakilyorganized, indicating that he or she has a very limitedunderstanding of reporting information.

98.6 The student presents little information and that is badlyorganized or even incoherent. Although the essay is on topic,it reveals little evidence that the student understands how toreport information.

our electives. Language is a full year course, and itis taught by Miss Prescott or Mrs. Ulchara. MissPrescott teaches German and Spanish. German isone of my most interesting classes thi: year, andthis is the class I chose to tell you about.

German is a 45 minute class, about not onlytheir language, but the grammar and the culture ofGerman, and other german speaking countries. Welearn how to pronounce words and how to writecorrect sentences. Sometimes we learn extrainformation like the history of Berlin, or the

47

customs of the German people. We learn aboutgreat people like Albert Einstein who was German,or the Austrian culture. I think the hardest part ofGerman is the grammar. In this language verbs andnouns change with the word order, and how yen.pronounce words depend on if they are dative,accusative or nominative.

At the beginning of each class Miss Prescottassigns us a "warm up" to do. A large sheet ofwhite paper with twelve words in English is put upin the front of the classroom. On a piece of scratch

Writing Assessment Report of Information 39

paper the students must write the correct words inGerman. Miss Prescott calls on people to give theanswers, three at a time. At this time we turn in ourhomework from the day before, and await the lay'slesson.

What we do in class depends on the book v'estudy ou: of. Our book is called German TodayOne. It consists of 23 chapters, each one containinga dialouge, a grammar section, a practice sectioncontaining about ten exercises, sometimes a"Kulterlesestuks" which is an essay on differentparts of the German culture, and on last page ofeach chapter a list of vocabulary words.

Each Thursday we have a speaking grade andevery Friday is a writte; : test day. The speakinggrades are the dialouges and "Kulterlesestuks formthe chapter we work on. Sometimes Miss Prescottwill use a sheet of 100 sentences in English for ourspeaking grade. What she does is dictate a sentenceand we would have to translate that into German.She gives each person about four or five sentences.Based on how well you do, if you know the words,etc.. she gives you your score between a 5 (F) and a10 (A+). To study for the dialouges, Miss Prescottputs on a tape with two actual German peoplespeaking the dialogue. Each day we listen twice tothe tapes to understand how to correctly pronouncethe words. Friday's written tests usually consist ofvocabulary and grammar. We spend three weeks oneach chapter, so the first week is just words, thesecond week, vocab. and some grammar and thelast week is everything from that chapter.

German is open to any student wishing to takethis course. Mo ct 8th graders are in German II,because in 7th grade they took German I. Germanclasses are small because not a lot of people areinterested in this language. In a way this is abenefit because Miss Prescott can spend more timewith one student. Our class has 28 people and wehave been together for our second year, so we allhave fun and enjoy the class.

German is a very interesting class because ofall the variety our teacher, Miss Prescott puts intoit. tam very glad I took it, and I am sure there isn'ta better German class and teacher.

Score Point 5: Commendable AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 5Feature (Elaboration): 4Conventions: 4

14.8 percent of the students Iachieved this scam.

40 Writing Achievement: A First Look

Carefully but predictably organized, thisauthoritative essay announces and defines its topicstraightforwardly. All of its "reasons" receive atleast a few sentences of elaboration, but nearly allreaders would welcome more information aboutwhat "kind of art" tae kwon do is and what isinvolved in practicing and mastering it. The writerunderestimates readers' interests in concreteexamples of one particular class at work or oftypical activities during class meetings. The writerconcludes too abruptly.

Not Titled

My hobble is Taekwondo, so I guess that iswhat I like to do best. Taekwondo is a Koreanmartial arts form of Karate.

I like to practice Taekwondo for three mainreasons. Fast of all it is very good excersice. Notonly physically but also mentally. Physically itbuilds up muscle and keeps me fit. Mentally,Taekwondo has taught me to strive for what I wantto achieve. Never quit and go for it all and keep apositive attitude.

My second reason is for the discipline. Thatmay sound kind of crazy but I like discipline. Allstudents higher rank than you or all of the instruc-tors are to be called sir. You must bow to theKorean flag and bow to all blackbelts. We allrespect each other. It may sound as if ourTaekwondo school is a prison but its not. We have alot of fun as we learn the art.

I called Taekwondo an art. That is my lastreason for Taekwondo being what I like to do hest.Any kind of art is nice to be able to do. Taekwondois an art that takes many years to master it. Ipractice hard in Taekwondo and I feel I haveaccomplished a lot of skill and knolege. I getrewarded for my hard work with trophies fromtournaments and certificates from tests.

By now you can probably tell why Taekwondois the thing I like to do best.

Score Point 4: Adequate AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 4Feature (Elaboration): 2Conventions: 1

32.3 percent of the studentsachieved this score.

Writlen by a student still masterinl English asa second language, this essay receives a low

48

conventions score. Although the writer struggleswith conventions of grammar and idiom, henevertheless understands how to think and write ina situation requiring informative discourse. Fromthis essay Canadian students (the designatedreaders) who had no experience of wood-shopclass would get some understanding of its activi-ties, challenge, and appeal. The writer manages toconvey his interest in the subject and his commit-ment to explaining it to readers. The only majorrhetorical shortcoming is that the writer moves tooquickly over many wood-shop class activities,elaborating on none of them. Like many adequateor limited essays in this assessment, this essayreveals a writer who could profit immediately fromgood instruction in strategies of elaborating andexemplifying. He is quite clearly capable ofdetailing the use of one machine or the steps incompleting one project or presenting the class andteacher at work.

Not Titled

Wood-Shop is a class I really enjoy to take,because I learn how to carve, draft, and build thingsin which I get to take home and be proud of. Tobegin with, I learn how to carve by using my owntwo hands and gouge, by which I can cut, shape,indent, etc.. Creating my own ideas and thenshaping and cutting them out on a piece of wood isrealy exciting. Next, our assignments are fun anddifficult too, because we have to think of somethingto make that includes drafting, such as; a plantholdr, or a book shelf. After thinking up somethingthat we could use we then have to draft the figurejust like arcatecs. Lastly, we learn how to usemachines such as; a drill, ban-saw, sander, jig sawand others. After learning to use these machines, weapply them to our projects by cutting the wood,sanding it and drilling it together to form ourprojects. Everyday in Wood Shop is learned,exciting and fun, and because of those three basictraits of Wood-Shop that is why I realy enjoy it somuch.

Score Point 3: Some Evidence of AchievementWItetorical Effectiveness: 3Feature (Elaboration): 1Conventions: 3

32.5 percent of the studentsachieved this score.

Through tone and direct address, this writerseems continually aware of his reader. The begin-ning is appropriate, and the advice-giving conclu-sion is especially effective. For the most part,however, the writer deprive; the reader of what hemost needs, concrete information about the school.The writer mentions teams, events, and activitiesbut fails to elaborate on any of them.

Not Titled

Dear Andrew,

I heard you were moving over here. I'mlooking forward to see you again. So how is itgoing dude? I heard how hard it was transferringto the school you go to now. Well, I guess I' II helpprepare you for this school since your biggestconcern is changing schools.

One of the good things about our school is thatwe have a dance every month. We also have a badfootball and basketball team. In P.E. we get to usegood equipment. It's not the best but its good. Ohyeah, we also have a bunch of electives to choosefrom.

Now for the bad staff Yeah, I know you don'twant to hear about them but you have to find outsooner or later. Well, here we go! First of all youcan only wear shorts on Fridays unless its a specialday. The food, the food isn t all that great. Well,that's about it.

If you're a new student, ye!: should try to makea good impression on them the first couple ofweeks. But don't over do it. Just don't act like youresuperman you know. Don't even act like youre evenjust a bit conceited. Hope to see you soon dude.

Score Point 2: Limited Evidence of AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 2Feature (Elaboration): 2Conventions: 3

12.3 percent of the studentsachieved this score.

This perfunctory essay reveals little commit-ment to its subject or interest in satisfying thereader. Its one redeeming feature is the smallamount of elaboration for "entertainment": con-certs, miniature golf, video games, water slides,dancing, and roller skating.

drAssessment: Report of Informauon 41ing

rt

Not Titled

Dear Scott,

In your letter you asked me to tell you aboutmy town or city. Well, if you want some enter-taiment, you can go to a concert and see one ofyour favorite band members preform. Or you cango w Blackbeards and either play minature golf,video games and get wet on the water sides. Theyalso have a place to dance, named the Light RouseAnd you can go to Fresno Roller Town, a place toskate.

As for jobs, you can have any job you want.You can study to be a teacher doctor, trucker,electri,4 etc. It's your choice.

Score Point 1: Minimal Evidence of AchievementRhetorical Effectiveness: 1Feature (Elaboration): 2Conventions: 1

2.6 percent of the studentsachieved this score

This barely mac ay (the handwrittenversion posed special pratems) does express a..limmer of interes- ,object and even someconfidence or authority in explaining how to getunder way on a motorcycle. This information isnot, howevcr, what readers need to know to in.vease their understatOng of owning end driving a

-11ctorcycle.

Not Titled

a mortorcycle t. a tit' wheeled vyhical thatgoes when you move the exclator. There are ailkinds of mortorcycles. you go buy gears usaly floegears one down ..Ind four up. when y:a get redy togo pull in the clutch q ui push dow on the kickstarter. after you have started push down on thegear changer. Then give it own gaes. then let clutchout slow.

Teachers' Comments on Achievemenc in Reportof Information

California classroom teachers wrote comments likethese after reading thousands of report of informa-tion essays during the summer of 1987:

42 Writing Achievement A First Look

1-

Students need to organize information, includespecific details, and give voice to their writing.

I'm going to continue working on detail but makesure that my students take longer to organize. ThenI want them to stop when they have nothing more tosay.

I will need to stress elaboration.

We need to put even stronger emphasis on elabora-tion of main points. Many students neglect todiscuss a topic fully.

Intervention at critical points in the writing processmay be the key to fostering better writing.

First, I am impressed with the number of studentsthat are able to express their ideas in writing. Iassumed that there would be more students whowere unable to write at all. I am excited about thepotential that is here and that can be developedonce strong writing programs are in place.

We're making progress! It seemed that few studentswere unable to respond to the prompt. Many whoseconventions scores were low displayed an ability toorganize their thoughts on paper.

As I read, I learned a great deal about studentwritingabout what makes it strong. As a result, Ibelieve I am better prepared to teach writing to mystudents. A big plus for me was meeting otherteachers and sharing ideas and experiences.

I believe the scoring guide allows teachers to lookat the substance of the paperthe quality ofthought and contentthus allowing the students towrite from 'their experiencesspecifically andconfidently.

Students ne, learn to organize their thoughtsgoing from general to specific ideas and at the sametime give voice to their writing.

The terminology used on the scoring guide allowsteachers to communicate about writing and discussit professionally.

I was impressed with the quality of writing of manyof the students. They had such diverse styles andunique ways of expressing themselves. With a littleguidance, many of the weaker papers had the poten-tial to be improved.

. Chapter 8

Summary of Writing Achievement

This chapter summarizes the results of California's first statewide direct writingassessment for grade eight. The successful administration of this first writing assess-ment is a major accomplishment for California's teachers and students. The assessmentwas designed by a team of 20 outstanding classroom English teachers who have servedas members of the CAP Writing Development Team. Each of 268,719 students wrotean essay in response to one of 15 prompts representing four types of writing. Nearly allstudents who took the test were able to comprehend the writing tasks and respond to thetopic. At four regional scoring sites, all essays were scored in eight days by 290 teach-ers who considered the scoring sessions &valuable opportunity to learn more about theteaching of writing. (Their comments are contained in chapters 4 through 7.)

California's new writing assessment establishes high standards of academicachievement that reflect goals set out in the EnglishLanguage Arts Framework forCalifornia Public Schools: Kindergarten Through Grade Twelve', adopted by theCalifornia State Board of Education in 1986. To do well on the test, students must (1)think critically and write intelligently in a wide range of situations; (2) report informa-tion clearly; (3) present memories and observations vividly; (4) argue convincinglyabout ideas and problems; and (5) write effectively about literature, science, andhistory. (In 1988, writing tasks about literature, science, and history were included inthe grade eight assessment.) Results from the first statewide grade eight writing assess-ment establish an achievement baseline from which improvements or declines inwriting achievement can be monitored statewide in school districts and at each schoolsite in the years ahead.

In 1987 grade eight students were assessed in four types of writing: autobiographi-cal incident (narrating a personal experience); report of information (explaining per-sonal knowledge about school, community, or hobbies); problera solution (arguing fora proposed solution to a school problem); and evaluation (justifying a judgment of abook, television program, or type of music),

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51

In April, 1988, students also responded toprompts in firsthand biography (presenting aperson they know well) and story (creating afictional narrative). And in 1989, students willwrite essays on 4;culation about causes or effects(arguing for proposed causes or effects of phenom-ena or events) and observational writing (presenting remembered observations of people, places,and events). Together, these eight types of writingrequire wide-ranging thinking and writing strate-gies.

Major Findings

Most students wrote adequate or margin-ally adequate essays (levels 3 and 4: 68Percent); a small percentage of studentswrote impressively (levels 5 and 6: 13Percent); and a larger percentage ofstudents wrote poorly (levels 1 and 2: 19percent).

Grade eight students seemed most compe-tent at reporting information (52 percentscored 4 or higher); noticeably lesscompetent at autobiography (46 percentscored 4 or higher); and markedly lessskilled at the two kinds of persuasivewriting in this assessment: arguing forsolutions to solve problems (41 percentscored 4 or higher) and supporting theirjudgments (34 percent scored 4 or higher).

Grade eight students have better control ofconventions than of rhetorical strategies.For example, in writing evaluations, 34percent scored 4 or higher for rhetoricaleffectiveness, and 58 percent scored 4 orhigher for conventions. For every type ofwriting assessed, students scored higher inconventions than in the thinking andcomposing requirements (rhetoricaleffectiveness) for each type of writing.

Essays were most coherent in autobio-graphical incident aid more coherent inproblem solution than In evaluation.

This chapter presents a summary of the resultsfrom the grade eight assessment for all scores andall types of writing, with interpretations anddiscussion provided by the members of the Writing

44 Writing Achievement: A First Look

Assessment Advisory Committee. It begins with acomparison of achievement in different types ofwriting (Chart 8-1), and continues with a compari-son of achievement in feature scores (Chart 8-2)and a report of achievement in conventions foreach type of writing (Chart 8-3). The informationin Charts 8-1 through 8-3 is synthesized in Chart 8-4, which summarizes the weighted average of thepercentages of all scores. These achievement levelsare described and interpreted by the WritingAssessment Advisory Committee. The implica-tions of the achievement levels are then discussedin the context of the probable writing and learningdemands of high school. The information anddiscussion in this chapter is followed by Chapter 9,which presents the committee's recommendationsdrawn from the statewide results.

Comparisons of Achievement in DifferentTypes of Writing

Do California's grade eight students write aswell in one type of writing as in another? Chart 8-1, which brings together the results for achieve-ment in rhetorical effectiveness (reflecting thethinking and composing performance for each typeof writing) reported separately in chapters 3through 6, indicates that students' achievement isbetter for some types of writing than for others.

Grade eight students seem most competent inreporting information, less competent in writingautobiographical incidents, and even less compe-tent at arguing for solutions to solve problems andsupporting their judgments in evaluations. Mem-bers of the Writing Assessment Advisory Commit-tee expressed surprise that students can explainthings better than they can write about rememberedevents, given the amount of personal writingassigned by junior high school English teachers. Itappears that students are writing casually aboutpersonal experience as their writing reveals a lackof experience in writing reflective, shaped autobi-ography.

Students certainly appear to be struggling withthe two forms of argument in this assessment,problem solution and evaluation. Fewer than 1percent scored 6 and only 10 percent scored 5 inthese important writing situations. Sixty to 65percent of students scored no higher than 3.Problem solution requires students to describe aproblem and argue convincingly for a solution.Students need to learn to anticipate their readers'

2

Chart 8-1

Percents of California Eighth Grade Students Achieving at RhetoricalEffectiveness Score Points in Four Types of Writing

Score Point

Excep-tional

Commend-able

Ade-quete

SomeEvidence of

Achieve-ment

LimitedEvidence of

Achieve-ment

MinimalEvidence of

Achieve-meat

No Re-sponse

OffTopic

6 5 4 3 2 1

Autobio-graphical

2.0 11.8 32.3 34.9 15.1 3.4 0.3

Incident

Evaluation 0.5 8.1 25.5 42.4 19.2 3.6 0.3 0.5

Problem 0.7 9.3 29.6 39.9 16.7 3.2 0.2 0.5Solution

Report of 4.1 14.8 32.3 32.5 12.3 2.6 0.2 0.6Information

objections and consider alternative solutions theirreaders may favor. Evaluation requires carefulanalysis of the subject being examined and confi-dent use of evidence from it to support the writer'sjudgment.

Comparisons of Achievement in FeatureScores

The second score assigned to every studentpaper was a feature score. Feature scoring guideswere designed to provide further information byaddressing additional characteristics in the studentwriting, such as elaboration and coherence. Coher-ence was scored in autobiographical incident,problem solution, and evaluation; and elaborationwas scored in report of information. In every casethe feature scoring guides were tailored to theparticular type of writing being assessed so thatalthough coherence was assessed within threetypes of writing, the coherence scoring guideswere designed to reflect the special characteristics

of coherence in a given type of writing. Chart 8-2presents the percentages of California grade eightstudents achieving six feature score points in thefour types of writing.

This chart reveals that essays were mostcoherent in autobiographical incident and more-herent in problem solution than in evaluation, aresult that parallels rhetorical effectiveness scoresfor these types of writing (see Chart 8-1). Aboutthe same percentage of these three types of essayswas scored 4, 5, or 6 for rhetorical effectiveness asfor coherence. By contrast, elaboration scores werelower than rhetorical effectiveness scores in reportof information (39 percent versus 52 percent forscore points 4 through 6 combined). It may havebeen easier for students to achieve coherence inautobiographical incident than in persuasivewriting because of their greater familiarity withnarrative rhetorical structures present in stories andnovels than with the structures present in argu-ment.

53Summary of Achievement 45

Chart 8-2

Percents of California Eighth Grade Students Achieving atFeature Score Points in Four Types of Writing

Score PointFeature

6 5 4 3 2 1

Coherence 2.7 12.2 30.7 34.0 16.1 3.8(AutobiographicalIncident)

Coherence 1.6 7.4 23.3 40.1 22.7 4.3(Evaluation)

Coherence 2.1 10.0 28.0 37.4 18.6 3.4(Problem Solution)

Elaboration 3.4 9.8 26.1 43.9 14.5 1.5(Report ofInformation)

Achievement in Conventions

Chart 8-3 reports the results of scoring essaysfor control of conventions.

Chart 8-3 indicates that California grade eightstudents have much better control of conventions

(usage, spelling and punctuation) than of compos-ing strategies. For example, in writing evaluations,34 percent scored 4 or higher for rhetorical effec-tiveness and 58 percent scored 4 or higher forconventions. For every type of writing assessed,

Chart 8-3

Percents of California Eighth Grade Students Achieving atConventions Score Points in Four Types of Writing

Score PointNo Re- Off

6 5 4 3 2 1 sponse Topic

Conventions 4.0 15.9 29.1 29.3 163 4.9 02 0.3AutobiographicalIncident

Conventions 5.9 21.3 31.8 24.4 12.4 3.4 0.3Evaluation

Conventions 3.9 15.6 28.1 31.4 17.0 3.4 ().2 0.5Problem Solution

Conventions 6.5 20.3 32.5 27.8 10.1 1.9 0.2 0.6Report ofInformation

46 Writing Achievement: A First Look

54

students scored higher in conventions than inrhetorical effectiveness. Members of the commit-tee were not displeased with the results for conven-tions, given that the papers reflected first-draftwriting on a timed test.

Statewide Average Achievement Levels

Chart 8-4 reports statewide average scores,combining rhetorical aectiveness, feature, andconventions scores from all four types of writing.Within each type of writing, its three separatescorings were weighted as follows: rhetoricaleffectiveness (65 percent); feature score (25percent); and conventions (15 percent). The thirdcolumn in Chart 8-4, "General PerformanceDescription," describes in a very general way whata hypothetical student can do at achievement levels1 through 6.

Members of the Writing Assessment AdvisoryCommittee observed from Chart 8-4 that moststudents write adequately or marginally adequateessays (levels 3 and 4: 68 percent). A smallpercentage of students write impressively (levels 5and 6: 13 percent). More students (too many, in theopinion of the committee) write poorly (levels 1and 2: 19 percent) than impressively.

Very few California grade eight students writewell enough to meet the high standards of thestate's new achievement test in writingstandardsimplied in California's 1986 EnglishLanguageArts Framework'. Only 2 percent meet the higheststandards, and no more than 13 percent performbeyond a level that can be considered acceptable oradequate. High-performing students who write atlevels 5 or 6 probably fully understand typicalschool and realistic writing situations like thoseposed by this test: they can vividly retell personalexperience, justify an evaluation, argue convinc-ingly for the solution to a problem, or reportinformation comprehensively and understandably."'hey control a wide range of thinking and writingstrategies that enable them to achieve their pu:poses for particular readers. Their writing isdeveloped, coherent, and nearly error-free. Theyknow how to engage readers and hold their atten-tion. They write with an authority and confidencethat inspires readers' trust. (Examples of essaysrepresenting all of Chart 8-4's average achieve-ment levels can be found in Chapters 4-7.)

Students who write at achievement level 4know how to respond to a wide range of writing

situations. They write coherently and with fewerrors and seem aware of their readers. They do..3t, however, develop scenes, points, or argumentsas fully as writers at achievement levels 5 and 6.Their writing often lacks controlling focus and thekind of commitment, energy, or liveliness thatwriting teachers call "voice." Still, given the highstandards of this writing assessment, level 4represents solid writing achievement. Studentswho can step up to this plateau are ready for therefinements that can lead them still higher. Forty-three percent of California's eighth graders achieveat least level 4.

At achievement level 3, students are poised forsubstantial writing development. They recognizeand respond appropriately to the four writingsituations in the 1987 test, but their writing revealsa limited range of thinking-in-writing strategies.They are unlikely, for example, to include specificevidence from a novel or movie to support anevaluation of it or to anticipate readers' objectionsto a proposed solution to a problem or to ed=ify aremembered scene with concrete visual details.Although their essays are readable, level 3 writerscannot consistently maintain coherence and theymake frequent errors. Because students writing atthis level can readily improve their writing,teachers working with them can observe noticeableimprovement. Fully 80 percent of California'seighth graders already achieve at least at level 3.

Students writing at level 2 (16 percent) and atlevel 1 (3 percent) cannot write very much (nearlyalways less than a page in 45 minutes of writingtime). They cannot maintain coherence, and theymake many errors. They recognize the writingsituation and can produce a few sentences on topic,but they have few if any thinking/writing strategiesfor developing their ideas. The Writing Assess-ment Advisory Committee agreed that manystudents who do not write well are thc:-.e who aretracked into skill-and-drill curricula in whir i blanddittos and worksheets substitute for effectivewriting instruction.

Context for the Achievement Results in Chart8-4

The CAP writing assessment is a full-rangeachievement test that challenges the very bestwriters while at the same time realistically evaluat-ing the writing of all of those tested. The results

55Summary of Achievement 47

Chart 8-4Statewide Average Achievements

Percentage of Cumula-California tive

Score Paint Grade 8 Students Percentage

6. 2.0 2ExceptaonalAchievement

5CommendableAchievement

4AdequateAchievement

3Some Evidence ofAchievement

2Limited Evidence ofAchievement

1

Minimal Evidenceof Achievement

12

29

36

16

3

14

43

79

95

98

Genera! Performance Description

The student produces purposeful, focused writing that reflectsexceptional insight into the writing situation; revealscommitment to the subject, confidence in presenting it, andcareful consideration of readers' knowledgeand values; showsverrottlie use of writing strategies appropriate to his or herpurpose; engages readers from the beginning and closes in asatisfying war maintains coherence throughout; elaboratesmain points or important scenes and people specificallyandcompletely, and conunits few if any sentence-level errors.

The srudent products purposeful, focused writingnutt reflectsfull understanding of the writing situation; reveals interest inthe subject, confidence in presenting it, and awareness ofreaders; uses writing strategies well chosen for his or herpurpose; maintains coherence and develops main points; andcommits few sentence-level errors.

The student produces writing that reflects good understandingof the writing situation; indicates that he or she is aware ofreaders and controls relevant writing strategies for satisfyingreaders' expectations; maintains coherence; developssome ideasor points moderately well; and conunits occasionalsentence -level errors.

The student produces writing that reflectsunderstanding ofthe writing situation, but shows that the writercontrols onlya narrow range of writing strategies; reveals little awarenessof readers and limited development of ideas(though usuallymore than a p-ge in length); reveals occasional lapses incoherenze; and commits noticeable sentence-level errors.though the essay still easily readable.

The student produces writing that is on topic but reflectslittle understanding of the possibilities forpresenting asubject to readers; shows restricted development of ideas(rarely mor than a page in length); reveals occasional lapsesin coherence; and commits frequent sentence-level errors thatsometimes slow or stop the reader.

The student produces a few sentences (rarely more than a page)on topic; sometimes shows fragmentary or incoherent listingof loosely related sentences; and may commit errors in everysentence.

Weighted Average Percentage of Three Scores in Four Types of WritingThis column does not total to 100% because of off-topic, no response, and rounding.

48 Writing Achievement: A First Look

provide information about how well teachers inCalifornia junior high schools and middle schoolsenable students to realize their intellectual poten-tial and prepare them for continued achievement inhigh school. It also provides a direct performanceassessment of the goals of California's English-Language Arts Framework', which are to prepareall students to:

Function as informed and effective citizensin our democratic society.

Function effectively in the world of work.

Realize personal fulfillment.

Two recent developments must bear oninterpretation of the statewide average achieve-ment levels in Chart 8-4. One development is cur-ricular, and the other comes from new theory andresearch on the role of writing in learning andintellectual development. The continuing curricu-lum reform movement in California's schools setshigher standards of achievement for all students. Itis commonly agreed that the reform efforts cannotcome to fruition unless achievement in reading,writing, listening, speakingthe essential literacyactivitiescan be enhanced for all students.Reflecting current views of language, learning, andliteracy, new publications from the California StateDepartment of Education detail the curricular andinstructional requirements for fuller achievementin reading and writing for all California students(English-Language Arts Framework, K-121;English-Language Arts Model Curriculum Guide,K-82; Handbook for Planning an Effective Litera-ture Program, K-123; Handbook for Planning anEffective Writing Program, K-124; RecommendedReading in Literature, K-85; and Model Curricu-lum Standards, 9-129. Together, these publicationspresent a vision of lively, challenging, and effec-tive English-language arts programs. By empha-sizing comprehensive writing programs and closereading of valued works of literature, the newprograms set higher expectations for all students,expectations with widespread support from parentsand from teachers. The CAP writing assessmentsurveys how well schools and students are meetingthe higher expectations.

Strengthened middle school and junior high

school English-language arts programs will makenew demands of students, as will the high schoolEnglish programs toward which students areheaded. It: California's high schools, where there isa new emphasis on higher-order thinking strate-gies, students will be writing more and longerpieces on all subjects. The Framework notes that"the relationship between writing and humanthought, basic to all disciplines, becomes theprovince of all teachers, who become helpers in theteaching of writing across the disciplines." Tomeet the writing demands of high school, juniorhigh school and middle school students will needto be able to write well in a wide range of situ-ations, many of which arise from new learning andfrom assigned reading. Continuing growth incultural literacy during the high school yearsrequires critical thinking and writing, particularlyin response to the ideas and values encountered inliterature-centered English classes.

The increased thinking and writing demands ofhigh school will be brought into even better focusas new science and history-social science curricu-lum frameworks developed by the Department ofEducation begin to influence school programs. Thenew grade twelve CAP writing assessment willalso contribute to higher standards and to higherexpectations of all students. Designed men likethe grade eight test, the new grade twelve test willassess a wider range of argumentative writing re-quiring interpretation, judgment, speculation,careful use of eviderle, and sensitivity to readers'knowledge and attituues. Students will be asked towrite about their learning in science andhistory-social science as well as about works ofliterature read in their English classes.

The high school cross-curricular writingrequirements discussed previously might seemexaggerated if it were still possible to considerwriting merely a way of reporting what one haslearned rather than a way to learn and a significantcontributor to personal and intellectual develop-ment. New views of language and of writtenlanguage in particular give writing a ...entral,essential role in learning, not a peripheral role. In arecent book (Written Language and PsychologicalDevelopment, Ablex, 1986), Leonard Scintoconcludes that "later phases of psychologicaldevelopment and, in particular, higher mentalfunctions" can best be understood by consideringthe special contributions made by written Ian-

57Summary of Achievement 49

guage. Agreeing and reflecting on their studies ofwriting in schools, Judith Langer and ArthurApplebee (How Writing Shapes Thinking') pointout that wrqing is "a major vehicle for conceptuallearning in all the academic disciplines." Theyconclude that "written language does indeed makea contribution to content learning, and it cansupport the more complex kind of reasoning that isincreasingly necessary for successful performancein our complex technological and information-based culture." -

Although grade eight students are a few yearsaway from parenthood, voting, citizenship, career,or college, it is possible to conjecture about howwell their current level of writing achievementprepares them for these inevitable roles. It wouldbe a grave mistake to underestimate the importanceof writing to all these roles. Even more than inhigh school, students in college are known to theirinstructors largely through their writing. Tosucceed in college, students must know how to usewriting for learning and be able to write confi-dently in various academic writing situations.Their writing achievement will determine to alarge extent whether they remain in college. It mayeiten influence their decision to apply for admis-sion to college. More than ever before, careersdepend on information management. Only studentswho write adequately or better have access to thefull range ef career choices and to requisite ad-vanced training. Writing contributes to active,responsible citizenship. Students who cannot writeadequately may be unable to ensure their rightsand privileges, participate fully in communityorganizations or in action groups, adopt leadershiproles, and influence the thinking of others.

Implications of Achievement Levels in Chart

8-4

The achievement 1...vels in Chart 8-4 containimplications regarding the degree to whichCalifornia's eighth graders are prepared to takeadvantage of the reading, thinking, and writingopportunities in more challenging high schoolprograms as well as the degree to which studentsare capable of using writing for purposes ofcitizenship. A review of the results summarized inChart 8-4 and the essays scored at levels 5 and 6 inchapters 4 through 7 reveal that there is littlereason to worry about the ability of these students

50 Writing Achievement: A First look

to benefit from a stimulating high school pro-gramjudging from one sample of their writingperformance alone. Students writing at levels 5 and6 who can produce purposeful, focused writingthat reflects insight, elaborates main points orimportant scenes and people specifically andcompletely, shows versatile use of writing strate-gies well chosen for the writer's purpose, andcommits few errors in mechanics and spelling areachieving at a level that ensures the fullest possiblecontribution of writing to learning and to personaland intellectual growth. Such students havedemonstrated that they can write with an authorityand confidence that inspires readers' trust, anability which is likely to help them ensure theirrights and privileges, participate fully in commu-nity and school organizations and action groups,and influence the thinking of others.

Level 4 represents solid writing achievement.At this level the writing develops some ideas orpoints moderately well, indicates that the writer isaware of readers and controls relevant writingstrategies for satisfying readers' expectations,maintains coherence and commits occasionalsentence-level errors. Students who have reachedthis level are poised and ready to benefit frominstruction that will lead them still higher. Theirlevel of writing proficiency promises to contributeto personal and intellectual growth through writingand promises to meet most of the writing demandsof high school. These students, like those achiev-ing at levels 5 and 6, have demonstrated that theycan use written language at a level likely to helpthem ensure their rights and privileges, participatefully in community and school organizations andaction groups, and influence the thinking ofothers though perhaps not yet so fluently andengagingly as those achieving at levels 5 and 6.

The greatest percentage of grade eight students(37.4 percent) attained level 3 in writing ability. Atthat level, student writing is easily readable andusually more than a page in length but reveals littleawareness of readers and achieves limited develop-ment of ideas, The papers show that their authorscontrol only a narrow range of writing strategies,reveal occasional lapses in coherence, and commitnoticeable sentence-level errors. Although thislevel of writing achievement still enables participa-tion in learning and contributes to personal andintellectual growth, success with the writingdemands of high school is likely to be limited

58

i

unless substantial development in writing abilityOccurs.

At levels 2 and 1, students produce writing thatis on topic but shows restricted fluency anddevelopment of ideas and reveals lapses in coher-ence and frequent sentence-level errors which

sometimes slow or stop the reader. These levels ofwriting achievement are likely to limit and in somecases severely restrict participation in learningthrough writing. Success with the writing demandsof high school is likely to be frustrated and endan-gemd.

References

1 EnglishLanguage Arts Framework for Califbrnia Public Schools, Kindergarten Through Grade Twelve. Sacra-mento, Calif.: State Department of Education, 1987.

2 English Language Arts Model Curriculum Guide, Kindergarten Through Grade Eight. Sacramento, Calif.: StateDepartment of Education, 1987.

3, Handbook for Planning an Effective Literature Program. Kindergarten Through Grade 12, Sacramento, Calif..State Department of Education, 1987.

4 Handbook for Planning an Effective Writing Program. Sacramento, Calif.. State Department of Educanon, 1986.5 Recomnzenled Reading in Literature: Kindergarten Through Grade 8. Sacramento, Calif.. Stat., Department of Edu-

cation, 1986.-

6 Model Curriculum Standards: Grades Nine Through Twelve. Sacramento, Calif.. California State Department ofEducation, 1985.

7. Judith A. Langer and Arthur N. Applebee. How Writing Shapes Thinking. A Study of Teaching and Learning.Urbana, III.: National Council of Teachers of English, 1987.

59Summary of Achievement 51

A

A

Chapter 9

Summary of Recommendations

From California's first statewide direct writing assessment come varied findings.Chapters 4 through 7 present these findings for each of the four types of writing as-sessed, and Chapter 8 summarizes the results for all scores and all types of writing,notes inferences to be made from them, and conjectures about possible interpretations.With these findings and interpretations as the context, members of the Writing Devel-opment Team produced recommendations for classroom teachers, school district andschool-site cuniculim leaders, parents, and teacher educators so that all of these groupsmight contribute to improved writing achievement iT . California as higher standards ofliteracy are put into place.

Recommendations for Teachers1. Teachers should offer junior high school and elementary school students

more direct instruction in the special writing and thinking strategiesrequired for different types of writing. Teachers should expect of eachstudent the highest possible writing achievement in several kinds of writing,not mere competency in one or two. Teachers will need to assign sustained(multiparagraph) writing frequently and help students revise to strengthenrhetorical effectiveness. By helping students analyze their own w iting alongwith published writing, teachers enable students to gain confidence with thespecial writing strategies of many types of writing.

2. Because writing development depends in part on reading development, teachersshould ensure that all students read widely, analyze some works in depth,speculate about characters' motivations, reflect on human values, and debatesocial issues. Students should also have an opportunity to read and analyzethe same type of reading they are writing. For example, they should readand discuss published autobiography as they write autobiographicalincidents and firsthand biographies, short stories as they write stories,

53

60

articles speculating about the causes ofevents or phenomena as they writeessays speculating about causes, and soon. The Writing Assessment Handbook:Grade 8' includes suggested readings ap-propriate to the types of writing CAPassesses.

3. Teachers should extend the intensiveand sustained literacy program de-scribed in the first two recommenda-tions to all studentsdisadvantagedstudents as well as advantaged students,students whose primary language isother than English as well as fluentspeakers of English, and low achieversas well as high achievers. Some studentsare denied opp3rtunities for suchenriched programs as a result of inap-propriately low teacher expectations.Special efforts must be made to ensureequally challenging classrooms for all."Limited-English Proficient" studentsshould have opportunities to build an theirabilities to think about a topic by begin-ning with informal writing and proceedingthrough the writing process to producefully realiz?--..d .-...,ssays. All students shouldhave practice telling and writing abouttheir experience as it supports their emerg-ing values and opinions.

4. Teachers should provide more carefulinstruction in types of persuasive writ-ing, such as those assessed by CAP, forstudents in middle school. In keepingwith Recommendatioa 2 teachers shouldpresent samples of persuasive writing asliterature in junior high and middle schoolsto provide students with exemplary modelsto help them write their own arguments.(See Writing Assessment Handbook:Grade 8' for suggested readings for eva7ation, problem solution and speculationabout causes and effects.)

5. Teachers should discuss with eachstudent the specific strategies of auto-biographical incident (using dialogue;providing, visual details of scenes; andshowing characters moving, talking,gesturing) to help them lift their writingabove the level of rambling or brief

54 Writing Achievement A First Look

generalization. This emphasis should bereinforced by the careful reading ofpublished autobiography and the use ofexemplary models of student-producedautobiographical writing such as those in-cluded in the Writing Assessment Hand-book: Grade 8'.

6. Teachers should help students use thestages of the writing process, withspecial attention being given to specificcomposing strategies for different kindsof writing so that students will learn torevise their writing with the help ofappropriate criteria. The best classroomwriting assignments require a rich, sus-tained composing process for completion:discussion, prewriting, or research; draft-ing; teacher conference and guided peerresponse; revision; appreciative peer read -araunds; student self evaluation of learningduring the composing process; and displayor publication. (See the Handbook forPlanning an Effective Writing Program4,for a more complete description of thestages of the writing process.)

7. Teachers should keep in mind othertypes of writing not assessed by CAP asimportant and worthwhile types thatshould not be dropped simply becausethey are not tested. There are types ofwriting (such as poetry and soiig lyrics)that are desirable in a well-roundedEnglish language arts program but notappropriate for large-scale assessment.

Recommendations for School District and School-Site Administrators

1. School-site administrators shouldensure that CAP writing assessmentmaterials are available to allEnglishlanguage arts teachers. Thesematerials include A Report to Teachers onWriting Achievement: Grade 8' (1987),along with scoring guides and sampleessays (mailed to all junior high andmiddle schools in November, 1987); andthe Writing Assessment Handbook: Grade8" (mailed to all California school districtswith an eighth grade in November, 1986).(For further information regarding these

61

documents, contact the CAP office at 916-322- 2200.)

2. School-site administrators should bringall teachers together to discuss thepossibilities for sustained writing in allclasses at all levels. Beginning in 1988,CAP grade eight test prompts will directsome students to write about their learningin history and science as well as theirreading of literature. A middle school withgrades six through eight might want todivide up for special emphasis by gradelevels the eight types of writing to beassessed by 1989, ensuring, however, thateach type is returned to at least once eachyear. Such a plan, combining writing withcore and recreational reading require-ments, would provide the systematic,articulated Englishlanguage arts curricu-lum called for in California'sEnglishLanguage Arts Framework'. (SeeSection TV, "Management Guidelines," inthe Writing Assessment Handbook: GradeP.)

3. The best staff development model forEnglishlanguage arts provides for a seriesof workshops over a substantial period oftime. If students are to meet the highliteracy standards set by the CAP writingassessment, junior high school teachersneed a deep understanding of the writingand thinking demands of a wide range oftypes of writing. Such understandingrequires time to read, write, and discuss.One-time staff-development presentationsoffering only further gimmicks will notdeepen teachers' understanding of dis-course or increase their students'achievement. Administrators shouldmake a special effort to help teachersschedule in-service training workshopsextending over several sessions and ledby qualified teacher-consultants.

4. Because good writing instruction requiresan amount of tutorial or conference time,teachers must be able to talk to studentsabout their writing in progress, not justmark and grade finished essays. For thisbasic requirement for good writing tobe met, class size must be reduced for

_______I

all Englishlanguage arts teachers inCalifornia schools.

5. Many publishers and private consultantsare already offering materials and work-shops and promising to improve students'scores on the CAP writing assessment.Schools and school districts shouldevaluate these offerings carefully. Schoolsshould especially consider whetherpublished materials offer anything notalready available in the teacher-developed,classroom-tested Writing AssessmentHandbook: Grade P. Consultants promis-ing formulas, easy solutions, or quickresults will have little to offer teacherswho want to teach seriously the types ofwriting CAP assesses and to prepare theirstudents for adequate to high achievementin these types. Consultants who are unableor unwilling to concern themselves withthe specific rhetorical requirements of thetypes of writing CAP assesses will be ableto add very little to what teach= alreadyknow. If writing instruction is to moveto a new level of effectivenesstobecome an even higher priority withinthe context of a balanced literature-based Englishlanguage arts curricu-lumthen only the best-qualifiedconsultants will be able to contributematerials and workshops. Members ofCAP's Writing Development Team arequalified to advise other teachers, alongwith California Writing Project and Cali-fornia Literature Project Fellows who havebeen specially trained to present CAPmaterials.

6. The CAP writing assessment should notsupplant individual student writing assess-ment at the school site. Schools need todevelop their own assessment programs,such as portfolio assessment orschoolwide assessment of writingsamples. The CAP writing assessmentprovides teachers with useful strategiesand techniques for their own assessments.For example, the types of writing assessedin grade eight suggest a wide range ofwritings that might be included (or evenrequired) in a portfolio, and criteria

62

Summary 55

outlined in the scoring guides could assistin evaluating a student's best work in aportfolio. Additional types of writing, suchas poetry, song lyrics and dialogue, mightalso be included. Writing portfolios canfollow students from year to year andprovide repeated occasions for students'assessments of their writing developmentand for parent conferences.

Recommendations for Parents

1. Parents should encourage good teachingof writing by inquiring specificallyabout the amount and variety of sus-tained (inultiparagraph) writing theirchildren are being assigned in everyclass. They can ask how much of thewriting will be revised for both rhetoricaleffectiveness and conventions. Parents canshow their appreciation to teachers whomake engaging assignments and encour-age children's writing development.

2. Parents should show their children thatthey are especially interested in all thewriting they complete at school. Chil-dren can read their writing aloud anddisplay it on the refrigerator door, and theycan talk about what they like best about apiece of writing. Parents should respondfirst of all to the ideas and insights in thewriting. They should look for somethingto praise and need not correct errors unlessasked by the children. To persist with thechallenging work of learning to write,young writers need their writing to betaken seriously and to be praised andencouraged, especially by parents andsiblings.

3. Parents can ask their children to write.Several writing situations are suggested byclassroom teacher Mary Adamczyk (in theNew York Times, January 3, 1988).Students may be encouraged to:

Compose invitations to a dinner,party, or picnic.

56 Writing Achievement: A First Look

Compose stories for a sibling.List things iieeded for an overnightstay.Plead a case for an additionalprivilegeanything from a laterbedtime to a driver's license.Make a deal ("If you let me . . .,then I'll . .. .") Considering faultymemories, this is a particularlygood time to get it in writing.Justify an allowance increase withan expense account and budget,perhaps including a savings plan.Rationalize a special purchase (forexample, a hamster or a computervideo game).Negotiate wages for extra choresby submitting a written bid de-scribing the work to be done,benefits, wages, guarantees, anddeadlines.

Recommendations for Teacher Educators

1. College and university English depart-ments should offer English teachers intraining a balanced program in litera-ture, language study, and writing.Teachers need writing workshops as wellas literature courses. They must be knowl-edgeable about the full range of writtendiscourse. Better, they should be confidentwriters across the full range of writtendiscourse.

2. English methods courses should intro-duce students to the newEnglishLanguage Arts Framework' aswell as to CAP writing assessmentmaterials. The Writing AssessmentHandbook: Grade 83 and Writing Assess-ment Handbook: Grade 12' can contributesubstantially to students' education incontemporary discourse. Model studentessays, scoring guides, writing assign-ments, classroom activities, and recom-mended readings provide rich material fordiscussion and lesson planning.

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References

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1. EnglishLanguage Arts Framework for California Public Schools, Kindergarten Through Grade Twelve. Sacra-mento, Calif.: State Department of Education, 1987.

2. EnglishLanguage Arts Model Curriculum Guide, Kindergarten Through Grade Eight. Sacramento, Calif.. StateDepartment of Education, 1987.

3. Writing Assessment Handbook: Grade 8. Sacramento, Calif.: State Department of Education, 1986.4. Handbook for Planning an Effective Writing Program. Sacramento, Calif.. State Department of Education, 1986.5. A Report to Teachers or. Writing Achievement. Grade 8. Sacramento, Calif.. State Department of Education, 19876. Writing Assessment Handbook: Grade 12. Sacramento, Calif.: State Department of Education, 1987.

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