Page 1

By email to all members of Swindon Phoenix Rotary Club, and some members of Foothill Highlands Rotary

Club USA, Tappahannock Rotary Club USA, also Rotary Club Members in Australia, Indore and Bhopal

India and special supporters elsewhere

Secretary; P.P.

John Fisher

Immediate

Past President

Nicole Price

Issue number 267

Volume number 6

Number 12 of this Rotary Year (excluding special issues)

Next weeks host is

Rotarian Gail Light

Editor; P P Peter Editor; P P Peter Editor; P P Peter

Goldsworthy. Goldsworthy. Goldsworthy.

P.H.F. Sapphire P.H.F. Sapphire P.H.F. Sapphire

Sub Editor 2; PP Peter

(Grumpy) Newson PHF

It’s a Golds Issue as Chris has been a way for a few

days and I have stolen some time whilst Peggy is out at the re-launch of Goldsworthy’s Salon Marlborough after a refit so as I am home waiting to go to Council this evening I have started it

………………..and now I am back from Rotary and she hasn't come home yet!

Thanks Chris for keeping the Birdy flying for the Club you dun good lad! Now you can have the reins back again.

Next week is not an official Partners evening but President Nigel invites all members and Wings to come along to welcome Ronnie and Michele Wan into the Phoenix Family see you there...Golds!.... let Lynne Harper know a

as usual tho!

President

Nigel Causton

President Elect

Chris Sims

Club Treasurer

PP David Coe

Sub Editor; PP Paul

(Scoop) Parfrey PHF

Sub editor 3; P.E. Chris

(Super Scribe) Sims

Swindon Phoenix Rotary

Club

Honoured Recipient;

2016/17 Pride of Swindon

The Rotary Club of

Swindon Phoenix District 1100 England

weekly bulletin

The Birdy’

President Nominee

PJ O’Farrell

Page 2

Important Update already over 100

folk signed up for the Santa Run

……………..BUT don’t be complacent keep

promoting the event, we want/need 500 so

get those flyers an posters out and about!

Rotary Year

22nd April

2017

A plea from all your Editors Remember if you have a special speaker or have an

important item/meeting that club members should

know about and/or attend .. let the editors know! It is better for us

to be informed twice than not at all!! Remember if we don’t know

about it, then your important message will not get to the folk you

want to know!

OI! TAKE NOTE

OR!!!!

Brought our total

readings to over

1300 folk

Page 3

I had a bit of time the other evening so played around on Photoshop

Please excuse it not being perfect but as I said I only had a bit of time but felt this por-

trayed our current President correctly…. Well Done Nigel … and Julie …..‘cos of course he

couldn't do it without her!

Page 4

Next week Host Gail Light with a mes-

merising speaker!... also the Induction to

Swindon Phoenix Rotary of Ronnie Wan

all members and Partners invited to

come along welcome to meet and greet

Ronnie and his wife Michele. Remember

to inform Rtn Lynne Harper as normal

for partner attendance or to apologise

please! ...yes I know it a second reminder

for some of you but some folk miss things

y’know!

THIS WEEK AT THE CLUB

Host Rtn Charlotte Mudd

Business and Fellowship which followed

the Council meeting

Minutes from 27th September meeting

• Tonight was a Busi-ness & Finance meeting (B&F).

• Charlotte Mudd, host for the night said

grace.

• Dinner was curry and a chicken salad for those who didn't have curry.

• President Nigel confirmed the minutes of the last council meeting were signed off.

Secretary John Fisher gave a short update and information on how to get a Rotary car sticker if desired.

•President Nigel spoke about shelter

boxes and potential oth-er causes to support. Other presidents from the local area are raising funds for a radiotherapy appeal for use in Swin-don. Council agreed to focus on raising funds for the local appeal over the shelter boxes, and have made a pledge to donate £1,000 to the radiothera-py appeal.

• Treasurer David Coe gave an update on the club funds. Phoenix club account is looking healthy.. Charitable ac-count money is ear-marked for the radio-therapy appeal. There is a little bit left over, and money still to be raised, for other things such as the barge trip, RYLA, foundation.

PP Paul Parfrey updated the club on club service projects. Santa run sign up is going well, with entry costs go-ing through PayPal.

Page 5

PJ informed the club about an upcoming curry and quiz night on the 30th October. The cost would be £15 per-person with fur-ther details to fol-low. Please speak to PJ if you're in-terested.

PJ also gave an update on the car boot sale planned for the 26th November. It's going to be held in the Wroughton park and ride car park near Nationwide House on Pipers Way. Entry costs would be £5/car and £10/van with free entry for shoppers.

• Paul Parfrey updated the club on the Dragon Boat Festival. There have been 9 entries to date with more potentially in the pipeline. It will be known next year as the Dragon Boat Festival. If anyone is in-terested in joining the committee then please let Paul know.

Paul also gave an update on the barge trip. There are now 7 people trained in CCBM. The security deposit for the barge has increased this year but it's felt by council that any risk damage is mitigated by training received, therefore the trips will continue as planned. It may over a 2 week period this year with a potential Phoenix Club social in the middle.

• Membership update was given by Pres-ident Nigel. Ronnie Wan is due to be in-

augurated into the Phoenix club next week. Encouragement was given for members and their partners to attend to support, celebrate and welcome Ronnie into the club.

• International update was given by PJ who confirmed that planning was under-way for next year.

• John Fisher gave an update on RYLA on behalf of Elliott Causton. Our 2017 candi-date, Ellie, thoroughly enjoyed her expe-rience and is coming along to a future meeting to talk about her experience. Suggestions for future candidates should be passed to Elliott or John.

• President Nigel confirmed that there would be a £1,000 donation to Founda-tion once funds have been raised. Tony Horn explained to newer members what Rotary Foundation was.

Barbara Goulding gave an update as almoner. She informed the club about members ailments and is fol-lowing up on folk at the moment to offer the clubs sup-port and see if there's an-ything we can do to help. The club members will always send their love and best wishes.

Page 6

• Jan Kilby in-formed the club that a lo-cal gentleman, Tony Martin, who was a very active lo-cal fundraiser had sadly passed away.

• President Nigel informed the club on behalf of Nicole Price, that there is a Young Carers event coming up at the Old Vic. Further information will be cir-culated. See next column in B;ue

• Peter Goldsworthy spoke of a poten-tial black tie Christmas meal at Chisle-don House for Ro-tarians and their partners in De-cember. The last rotary meeting is planned for the 6th December and the Christ-mas black tie event would be after that. Fur-ther information will be circulat-ed to gauge in-terest and num-bers.

• Returning from holiday with gifts were Tony Horn and John Fisher.

Next weeks host is Gail Light who has a psychic medium to

speak.

• Lucky Lucy was drawn and the three winning numbers were 50, 120 and 11. The winners were Francis George, Miles Gough and Elliott and Joanne Causton.

• Sergeant at arms Tony Horn gave out copi-ous amounts of fines for the evening which helped raise charitable funds for the club. President Nigel thanked everyone for their sportsmanship and good humour in supporting the fines. (this raised over £35.00!!!!)

Editors apologies that some pics have been produced as greyscale in this issue due to the white balance control being knocked on the camera and you just would not have wanted to see what looked like Martian Rotarians so I con-verted them to greyscale!

Hi Golds,

Could you please add to Birdy for infor-mation?

Thanks Nicole

Benefit Gig on November 19th for ( Swin-don Young Carers)

8 till late (well after 11!!)

Venue: Downstairs stage/bar at the Vic

We have 2 bands confirmed (with a possible mash up of the bands for a short finale)

DJ Kenny Brookes who did the ‘Destination Anywhere’ night for many years at the Vic

(most amazing collection of sixties, soul, mo-town and dance)

Ticket price £10.00

If interested please let me (I.P.P. Nicole) know and I will arrange tickets for you.

Page 7

Hi Golds

Attached scanned image from the October Handy

Mag......we got on page 3!!! Paul

(Editor….Yep and this is it

Page 8

Omg, these could be our fu-

ture leaders, but on reflection are they any

different to the ones we have now????????????!!

Subject: Fwd: WHY TEACHERS DRINK

The following questions were set in last year's GED examination. These are genuine answers (from 18 year old students)

Q. Name the four seasons?

A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

Q. How is dew formed?

A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q. What guarantees may a mortgage com-pany insist on?

A. If you are buying a house they will in-sist that you are well endowed.

Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections?

A. Very important.Sex can only happen when a male gets an election.

Q. What are steroids?

A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs. (Shoot yourself now, there is little hope.)

Q. What happens to your body as you age?

A. When you get old, so do your bowels

Jokes

‘on the B

irdy’s

win

g’ and you get intercontinental.

Q. Name a major disease associated with cig-arettes?

A. Premature death.

Q. What is artificial insemination?

A. When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.

Q. How can you delay milk turning sour?

A. Keep it in the cow. (Simple, yet brilliant)

Q. How are the main 20 parts of the body cat-egorized (e.g. the abdomen)?

A. The body is consisted into 3 parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs and the ab-dominal cavity contains the five bowels: A,E,I,O,U

Q. What is the fibula?

A. A small lie.

Q. What does 'varicose' mean?

A. Nearby.

Q. Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarean section.'

A. The caesarean section is a district in Rome.

Q. What is a seizure?

A. A Roman Emperor. (Ah yes, Julius Sei-zure: I came, I saw, I had a fit)

Page 9

- The word "swims" upside-down is still "swims".

* Intentionally losing a game of rock, paper, scissors is just as hard as trying to win.

- 100 years ago everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars. To-day everyone has cars and only the rich own horses.

- Your future self is watching you right now through memories.

- The doctors that told Stephen Hawk-ing he had two years to live in 1953 are probably dead.

- If you replace "W" with "T" in "What, Where and When", you get the answer to each of them.

- Many animals probably need glasses, but nobody knows it.

- If you rip a hole in a net, there are ac-tually fewer holes in it than there were before.

- If 2/2/22 falls on a Tuesday, we'll just call it "2's Day".

Thanks Sam in Foothill Highland Cali-fornia

Q. What is a terminal illness?

A. When you are sick at the airport. (irrefutable)

Q. What does the word 'benign' mean?

A. Benign is what you will be after you be eight. (brilliant)

AND THE BEST IS LAST:

Q. What is a turbine?

A. Something an Arab or Sheik wears on his head.Once a Arab boy reaches puberty, he removes his diaper and wraps it around his head. (Now we are getting somewhere.)

Thanks Lillian in Oz…………………….

* If you attempt to rob a bank you won't have any trouble with rent/food bills for the next 10 years, whether or not you are successful.

* Do twins ever realize that one of them is unplanned?

* What if my dog only brings back my ball because he thinks I like throwing it?

* If poison expires, is it more poisonous or is it no longer poisonous?

* Which letter is silent in the word "Scent," the S or the C?

* The letter W, in English, is called double U. Shouldn't it be called double V?

* Maybe oxygen is slowly killing you and It just takes 75-100 years to fully work.

* Every time you clean something, you just make something else dirty.

Page 10

FOR YOUR DIARY

13th October Curry & Quiz Night Biplob Restaurant details from PJ

26th October Thursday Ypres Show Salisbury a Grumpy ex-cursion (expect rain!)

4th November Satur-day Poppy Ball by Swindon Thamesdown Rotary Club

12th November Remembrance Sunday

President laying Rotary Wreath at the Cenotaph SWINDON

10th November Past Presidents Dinner (when the Past Presidents host the President of the Year)

18th November Saturday Glastonbury Carnival trip with de-serving youngsters

26th November Sunday Our Car Boot Sale Fundraiser-Wroughton Park & Ride

3rd December Sunday Our Santa Run at Lydiard Park

6th December Last Club Meeting in December Partners invited

Other items are in the planning

& will be added as & when ..

this list is not exhaustive!

The Object of Rotary is to encourage and foster the ideal of

service as a basis of worthy enterprise and, in particular, to

encourage and foster:

1)The development of acquaintance as an opportunity for

service;

2) High ethical standards in business and professions, the

recognition of the worthiness of all useful occupations, and

the dignifying of each Rotarian’s occupation as an opportunity

to serve society;

3) The application of the ideal of service in each Rotarian’s

personal, business, and community life;

4) The advancement of international understanding, goodwill,

and peace through a world fellowship of business and profes-

sional persons united in the ideal of service.

(It is not usual to read the numbers aloud when reciting the object)

That’s all Folks !- but remember, we are a

Rotary Club of the 21st Century

Find more information on Swindon Phoenix Rotary on your pc;

Just control + click on these hyper links below

swindonphoenixrotary.org.uk

Previous bulletins thephoenixbulletin.weebly.com

Our Santa Run swindonsanta.org.uk

Dragon Boat Event www.dragonboatswindon.org.uk

Ffind us on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/SwindonPhoenixRotary?ref=hl

On twitter https://twitter.com

Swindon Phoenix Rotary Club

A Pride of Swindon

Awardee