diary as the playground of identity. andrej mircev

8/12/2019 Diary as the Playground of Identity. Andrej Mircev

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Diary as the (play)ground of identity

Abstract: Taking the diary manuscript conceived by the Hungarianpsychiatrist, writer, composer and visual artist Gza Csth (!!"#$$% asan e&ample o' complicated per'ormances o' the sel' and its identity, thepresent paper analyzes how the process o' identi'ication andsubectivization can be linked to the concepts o' mediatization, play andvarious signi'ying)narrative procedures, characterized by an absence o'clear cut borders between media or semiotic regimes* The thesis isdeveloped that it is the dynamic o' a speci'ic tension between the verbaland the visual, as well as the interplay between di''erent kind o' 'ramingsand discoursive strategies, that regulates the diary practice, turning it intoa stage o' becoming)unbecoming and a mirror o' the vanishing)de'erringpresence o' the author)subect* The argumentative line is being developedaccording to a psychoanalytic perspective, which presumes an iterative

(and imaginary% movement around the absent place o' the mother* +t thesame time, deploying a poststructuralist argumentation anchored in theuestion o' corporeality and desire o' the diary practice, the te&t e&aminesthe 'ragile and shi'ting 'rame between writing and li'e, 'iction andauthenticity, the rational and the irrational* + third view is o''ered having inmind -errida.s deconstructive reading o' /reud, where it is argued that inorder to properly understand the scene)event o' writing, one has to applyanother model o' scripture, which has its roots in the pictographic writingo' the hieroglyphs* /inally, in order to be able to situate the outlinedproblems and uestions in a wider conte&t o' literary, media and culturalstudies, a comparative perspective is o''ered, where the possible parallelsbetween 0alter 1enamin and Gza Csth are brought 'orth*

Key words: Tension, 2nterplay, Compulsion 3epetition, Te&t o' 1liss,Corporeality and -esire, -iary 4ractice, 4sychoanalysis, 5iminal6el'hood, +ctivity o' /raming, -rugs, +utobiography o' -ying, The +bsent1ody o' the 7other

2n the literary circles o' (Central#8uropean% avant#garde at the turn o' the

century, one name deserves special attention, especially when we are looking

'or an e&emplary 'orm o' an autobiographical discourse* Gza Csth , an

1Gza Csth was born in !!" in 6zabadka (nowdays 6ubotica in the north o' 6erbia% 'rom awell known lawyer 'amiliy 1renner* He was also the cousin o' the 'amous Hungarian writer-ezs9 :osztolnyi, to whome he used to write passionate letters about his turbulentemotional and se&ual events* 7ost o' his li'e, Csth spent living in between 6zabadka,1udapest and in di''erent small cities in the Hungarian country side, where he had worked asyoung doctor* 4arallel to his medical and psychiatric careere, he has been struggling tobecome recognized as a (play%writer and composer* ;et, since $< and his 'irst encounterwith morphine, he leads a desperate li'e, trying to stay =clean= and control his habit* 2n the/irst world war he can no longer get his morphinism in grip and he is being sent to variouswithdrawal clinics* 2n $$ a'ter he shot his wi'e >lga, he was again captured and imprisoned*

Trying to escape and cross the ;ugoslavian#Hungarian border, established a'ter the /irstworld war near his home town 6zabadka, Gza Csth takes a overdose o' 4antopne and dieson the 'ringe*

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early practitioner o' psychoanalysis, novelist, music critic, composer, painter,

morphine addict and -on ?uan)playboy, well known 'or his short stories,

deserves also to be recognized as the author o' a comple& body o' diary

scriptures, where the linearity o' the te&t is decentred by numerous drawings,

staves, sketches, collages, photos and various memorabilia he collected

during his li'e* 2n the conte&t o' the given theme o' the symposium, the

'ollowing te&t will try to reveal how Csth.s diary practice may be understood

as sel'#re'erential medium, which not only re'lects the identity o' the author,

but articulates and demonstrates the process o' subect constitution as an

event o' intermedial play between te&t and image* /ocusing on the

disintegration o' a stabile identity, the discoursive strategy will be to 'ollow and

re'lect the tension between di''erent semiotic regimes, which destabilize

coherent narrative and bring the reader to an awareness that identity is not to

be deciphered in the realm o' rational decision, but as a result o'

irrational)unconscious processes ruled by compulsive desire that de)regulates

the diary* +t the same time # and this shall be the argument # Csth.s diary

establishes an image o' a dislocated, 'ractured and delayed sel' caught in an

ambiguous and dangerous play with drugs on the very 'ringe o' sane

e&istence*

To be able to locate and e&cavate traces o' Csth.s identity, we shall 'irst

approach the material and medial dimension o' his writing, since it is on the

'ormal, scriptural#graphological level that the ludic (and per'ormative%

dimension o' subect constitution has its obvious mani'estation* +nother line o'

investigation that will be e&amined is the narratological procedure by which

identity gains visibility* These two perspectives ought to demonstrate that it is

through the medium o' the diary, its materiality, the signi'ying practices o'

writing)drawing and the intersemiotic play between te&t and image that Csth

is revealing (but also hiding% himsel'* ;et, as there can be no clear distinction

between 'iction)document and the author)subect is always already de'erred

'rom its authentic and originary presence, what remains is a paradigmatic

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=theatre o' identity,=@ constructed around a vibrant interplay between hiding

and resurrecting onesel' in the liminal space between words and images*

The play of tension and the blurred framings

Con'ronted with Csth.s diary manuscript, the reader will 'ind him)hersel'

immersed in a polyphonic structure o' a te&t blurred and 'ramed with

drawings, sketches, music staves or di''erent memorabilia 'rom newspapers,

theatre and opera booklets etc* (seeA illustration **%B* +lready at this level it

can be said that the perception and reception o' the materiality o' the diary is

determined by an oscillation between various semiotic and media modalities,

which can be interpreted as a tension among several 'rames* The way we

here understand the concept o' 'rames and 'raming corresponds to the idea

outlined by 0erner 0ol'A ='rames are keys to abstract knowledge, to

communication and pragmatic situation, but also to what is most interesting in

the present conte&t, namely to the understanding o' literature and other

media*= Considering the 'act that 'rames are to be understood as a

=transmedial phenomenon=D, which can be applied not only to visual arts, but

all other media (as well as to di''erent signi'ying practices%, their epistemic

value becomes evident in cases like Csth.s manuscript, whose architecture

is organized around the interplay between the te&tual and the visual code, as

well as between several discoursive strategies* 2n this regard the uestion o'

'raming corresponds with an attempt to de'ine (but also blur and subvert%

clear borders between media, arts or genres and, thus, it can serve as an

methodological and epistemic tool to be deployed in the 'ramework o'

2Chmurski, 7ateuz, "About the lifes rhytm". Csths diary: theory and practice of text in theCentral European context, manuscript o' the lecture presented at Gza Cstha con'erence,1aa, @


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interartistic and intermedial studies* -ue to a variety o' non#te&tual elements

which are integrated into the diary, it can be argued that in Csth.s case what

gains visibility is a continuous procedure o' ='rame breaking=F, where the te&t

is underlined with colors and its continuity)homogeneity interrupted by visual

insertionsA drawings, sketches, photos etc*

Covering a big period o' his li'e (starting when he was years old and with

his last entry in late summer o' $$% Csth.s diaryA =reveals his traectoryA

'rom a nave notes o' a schoolboy, to complicated identity choices and

morphine addiction*="6een in this light, the practice o' writing and drawing the

diaries invites the reader to think o' them as a kind o' sa'e zone outside o'

social order, where identity and the constitution o' the sel' is not only revealed

and re'lected, but also care'ully rehearsed, (re%'ramed and brought into the

scene* 2n his study o' play and its relation to culture, ?ohan Huizinga

emphasizes that the act)event o' playing creates a temporary world with its

own rules and orders inside the everyday world* 2n other wordsA =2nside the

play#ground an absolute and peculiar order reigns* Here we come across

another, very positive 'eature o' playA it creates order, is order* 2nto an

imper'ect world and into the con'usion o' li'e it brings a temporary, a limited

per'ection* 4lay demands order absolute and supreme*=!2' we contrast Csth

.s chaotic, nomadic and a''ective li'e controlled by se&ual and morphine

addiction with the diaries, in which he tries to re#gain power over his addiction

(and li'e in general%, it becomes clear that the diary practices represents a

way to create # however illusionary it may sound # an order* 2t seems like the

diary is mirroring this impossible whish, as during the years it becomes a

medium where he can promise to himsel' that he will live di''erently* The

tension between writing and li'e is something the reader is made aware o'

already in the 'irst 'ew sentences 'rom Csth.s published diary (the summer o'

$@%A =+ terrible and depressing thoughtA 2 have no longer any inclination to

write* 6ince 2 began to work penetratingly with analysis and to e&amine my

unconscious spiritual li'e in all its 'acets, 2 have no more need to write* ;et,

analysis brings su''ering, bitter recognition and disappointment, while writing

60ol', 0erner, ibid*, pp* $*7

Chmurski, 7ateuz, ibid*, pp* *8Huizinga, ?ohan, %omo udens. A &tudy of the 'lay(Element in Culture , 3outledge, 5ondon,$!


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brings oy and sustenance* 1ut still 2 cantI 2 write with di''iculty, an&iously* 2 am

inhibited by the 'eeling that other can read between the lines as clearly as 2 #

the psychoanalyst can read into the writing o' other authors* Eevertheless,

with iron will, 2 'orce mysel' to write* 2 must write* 8ven i' writing will never be

my li'es work again, at least it should be 'un*=$

Contrasting =real= li'e and its analysis to the oy o' writing, Csth e&plicitly

e&presses the tension between these two spheres, separated by a rather

volatile border* 2' we again direct our look at Huizinga.s re'lection on play and

its relation to culture, we may accept his argument that the element o' tension

is not only an essential part o' the play, but it is also through this element that

play is connected to aesthetics and artistic practices*ne o'

the basic issues within such an autobiographic situation revolves around a

series o' uestions that had been 'ormulated by 6idonie 6mith and ?ulia

0atson in their book on autobiographyA =0here do you 'ind evidences o'

con'licting models o' identity at work in the te&tJ 0hat.s the sigini'icance o'

these contradictions and con'lictsJ (***% 2' the narrator identi'ies himsel' as

having multiply marked identities, what holds these di''erences in some kind

9Csath, Geza, )he *iary of +ea Csath, +ngelusz K Gold, 1udapest, @


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o' dynamic tensionJ=@To be able to locate these multiply mar-ed identities,

we shall closer e&amine the interplay between the visual and the te&tual code

and the dynamics)interplay o' their 'raming*

0hat the reader discovers in one o' the pages o' Csth.s manuscript is a

scene where the te&t is interrupted by a drawing o' a middle aged man, who

holds a pen in his right hand (illustration *@*%* 0hat does Csth want to

achieve with this imageJ + meta#commentary on the process o' writingJ >r a

moment o' break, where the reader will dri't away 'rom the te&t and immerse

him)hersel' in the black lineJ 2' we interpret this constellation 'rom the

perspective o' the 'raming, it would be plausible to say that there is a two'old

'ramingA on one side the te&t is 'ramed by the drawing and on the other side

the te&t is 'raming the drawing* The dynamics o' this interplay between two

'ramings can be 'urther elaborated with the thesis o' ?ean#Claude

5ebenszten, 'rom his te&t &tartin out from the frame /inettes0A =6liding in

and out and 'rom one to the other to neither outside nor inside, 'rom the

imitated to the imitating, 'rom the 'ictive to the real, the 'rame with its uncertain

and unstable status attracts di''erent degrees o' space, real and 'ictive, 'ictive

and real and 'ictive as 'ictive, into its abyss*=B The process o' an

undecipherable and blurred 'raming that (de%regulates Csth.s diary practice

and sustains the tension between the image and the te&t corresponds to the

multiplicity o' possible identities* +t the same time, it is this shi'ting o' media

'rames, which makes it very hard to distinguish what is the inside o' the te&t

and where one should seek 'or its e&teriority, what is public and what belongs

to the sphere o' intimacy* 2nso'ar, the 'rame in the conte&t o' Csth.s diary can

be seen as =the play the two spaces=, two media and two semiotic regimes,

=as the place, or non place, o' a di''erentiation that is very complicated and is

not to be taken 'or grantedA that between the space o' the work and that o' the

viewer # between .art. and .li'e., .art. and .nature., .art. and .reality. (***%=

3eturning once more to the above described scene with the drawing that

depicts the event o' writing itsel', it could be worth to see it 'rom the

126mith, 6idonie)0atson, ?ulia, 1eadin Autobioraphy. A +uide for Interpretin ife2arrati3e, Lniversity o' 7innesota 4ress, 7ineapolis)5ondon, @


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standpoint o' the process o' mediation, as it is outlined in 1olter.s and Grusin

.s book on remediation* +lthough their te&t goes more into the direction o'

understanding new media and the relationship between immediacy,

hypermediacy and remediation, 1olter and Grusin developed an argument

that precisely deals with the process o' mediation and the presence o' the

sel', which can help us interpreting the medial tension and interplay o'

'raming* Creating a situation where on the level o' the visual message, Csth

reveals and in a deicticDmanner unmasks the act writing, what is being

e&posed is the medium o' the te&t and its materiality* The 'ragmented body o'

the writing subect, that Csth is bringing 'orth into the te&t 'unctions as

=hypermediated sel'=, whose presence re'lect embodiment, materiality and

mediality as the condition sine 4ua nono' writing*F2t can be argued that sel'#

re'erentiality o' the writing and the play with 'raming, have a similar 'unctionA

they both seem to be strategies the depict the mediality and materiality o' the

diary practice* The same can be said 'or the act o' drawing as a gesture that

not only indicates to a certain state o' a''airs, but also a''irms itsel'A =-as

zeigende Merweisen, das 8twas zeigen und das 6ich#zeigen*=" 2n view o'

these sel'#re'erential modes as moments o' hypermediacy and meta#

re'erentiality!where the acts o' writing and drawing are re'lected in their

embodiment and processuality, it could might be said that it is the actual

(play%ground on which the sel' is being staged, where it becomes visible in its

mediated 'orm and open to interpretation*

In the cruel theatre of sex and drugs

150hat we have in mind here is the deictic image theory as it is concieved by Gott'ried1oehme*161olter, ?ay -avid)Grusin, 3ichard, 1emediation. 5nderstadin 2e6 $edia, 72T 4ress,7assachusetts)Cambridge, $$$, pp* @BF*171oehme, Gott'ried, 7ie !ilder &inn ereuen. *ie $acht des 8eiens, 1erlin Lniversity4ress, 1erlin, @


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+pproaching Csth.s manuscript as an embodied =assemblage o' desire=$,

delineated by several 'rames whose tension re'lects a multiplied,

heterogeneous and decentred concept o' sel', we shall now try to 'ocus more

on the complicated relationship between the diary practice and its underlying

corporeality* The uestion o' this relation can be 'ormulated like thisA

=4recisely when and how does the body become visible in the narrativeJ (***%

2s the body a locus o' desire, or an impediment to the circulation o' desireJ

0hatNs the relationship between the material body o' a narrating .2. and the

body politicJ How is the body represented as a site o' sensuality and

emotionJ=@n the Bth o' ?anuary

$B, Csth gives the 'ollowing description o' his physicalityA =2 am so

revolting, weak and piti'ul that 2 must genuinely wonder at >lga, that se can

still love me and not be un'aith'ul* That se doesn.t become utterly disgusted

with my weak breathy voice, my constant glancing at the mirror (the natural

re'le& gesture o' the health comple&%, my cynical and shrivelled penis, my

withered 'ace (***% 2 think 2 smell tooO on account o' my ruined ol'actory sense, 2

cannot perceive the smell o' my poorly wiped arce or my decayed mouth*= @

+'ter (at that time% three years o' severe morphine and opium addiction Csth

is con'ronted with devastating e''ects o' the poison, whose traces he witness

with and on his whole body* + 'ew years later, when the vicious sel'#

19-eleuze, Gilles, )6o 1eimes of $adness, )exts and Inter3ie6s 9;


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destructive habit got totally out o' control and he committed suicide by taking

an overdose o' 4antopone, his cousin -ezs9 :osztolnyi noticedA =The

tragedy that 'or us is desire and satiation, eternal lack o' satis'action, was 'or

him that he could not raise the dosage in'initelyA his body cracked under it* (***%

>n his martyred body there wasnt a pennys circum'erence o' room the

hypodermic needle hadnt ripped up* (***% Could he have been saved

somehowJ 7orphine is always an e''ect never the cause*=@@

+s both the uotations o' Csth and :osztolnyi show, the uestion o' the

body is implicitly linked to desire, which, on the other hand, is directly linked to

drugs* Connected to (se&ual% desire, the poison traps the subect into a

circulus 3itiosuso' rhythmic oscillations o' manic#depressive good and bad

moods that destabilize any coherent identity, always chasing the demon ( in

'orm o' the unconscious drive% to penetrate the body with another dose o'

$adame $. /rom a psychoanalitic perspective it is worth mentioning that

there are several places in the te&t where Csth is writing about his deceased

mother, at the same time when he is describing his struggle with addiction and

when he is re'lecting his a''ective state o' mindA =-iary writing, despair*

/eeling o' disgust* (***% 1y the date o' my mother.s death, Fth /ebruary, 2 will

be completely 'ree* /inal inection on D /ebruary* The last one in my li'e*=@B

The empty place o' the mother around which Csth is circling in a hopeless

attempt to stop his sel'#destructive play, corresponds to a situation o' a

compulsory repetition o' trauma* Closely associated with mechanism o'

repetition o' trauma is the concept o' mourning, de'ined as an "identifcation

with the lost object", a process o intensie sorrow!24 #ind o

$elancholic eelin% that perades the $an&script can partl' be

&nderstood hain% in $ind the loss and the 'act that the repetition#

compulsion is connected to the death drive*@D+ proo' o' this thesis could be

'ound in one o' the visual moti's Csth keeps repeating throughout his diaryA

the drawing o' a skull (illustration *B*%* /rom a psychoanalytic point o' view,

22:osztolanyi, -eszo, #n the illness and death of +ea Csath, inA Csath, Geza, ibid*, pp*F"#"


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1atrice -idier suggestA =2' the reader has 'ollowed our reasoning and agrees

that diarists are 'i&ated on the mother and re'use to con'ront the oedipal

con'lict, then he must agree that our analysis is consistent and that these

diverse aspects o' diary writing are necessarily connected*=@F2n the conte&t o'

Csth.s diary, the 'i&ation with the dead mother@" results in an obsessive

attempt to 'ill the abyss at an imaginary playground, embodied in and with the

diary*

+ similar idea that =the writer is someone who plays with his mothers body=,@!

can be 'ound in 3oland 1arthes e plaisir du texte, where he makes a

distinction between pleasure and =ouissance, claiming that in the case o'

ouissance (or the text of bliss%, one is e&periencing an e&plosion o' literary

codes and is 'aced with a =state o' loss*=@$ Closely tied to an voracious

(re%production o' desire that the diary revolves around is the utopian attempt

to 'ill the void with either taking drugs or having se&* 1eing obsessed with his

se&ual and drug protocol Csth gives a very accurate account on the uantity

and uality o' se&ual encounter or the drug he has inected* 2n doing so, it

seems like he is trying to establish an order, gain control over desire that is

proli'erating over the years, damaging seriously his health and eventually

leading him to murder and later on to suicide)death* 2n the notes 'rom summer

$@, we readA =7y se&ual pleasure, however, was imper'ect, average # not

the piercing and harsh ecstasy that would have been usti'ied by the novelty o'

the situation* (***% 2 also recalled the unnecessary and silly *


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activity, which 'urther complicates an already intricate interplay between

di''erent semiotic regimes and medial layers* +t the same time this e&ample

demonstrates that the diary is the playground on which Csth con'ronts

several o' his identities, e&pressed in di''erent discourses*B@>n one side there

is a poetic, artistic language and on the other, an abstract, diagnostic and

medical discourse embodied in spreadsheets, cryptic symbols, medical

e&pressions in 5atin, numbers etc* This tension between the two discourses

re'lects not only two approaches to the diary, but also a con'lict between the

=rational= Csth and his irrational doppelganger, overwhelmed with insatiable

se&ual and narcotic desire, that circles around the absent body o' the mother*

1eing, there'ore, a te&t and image o' bliss, we may say with 1arthesA =This

te&t is outside pleasure, outside criticism, unless it is reached throuh another

text of bliss: you cannot speak .on. such a te&t, you can only speak .in. it, in

its fashion, enter into a desperate plagiarism, hysterically a''irm the void o'

bliss (***%*=BB

1e'ore turning our attention in the 'inal chapter to the scene of 6ritin, we

would like to o''er one last perspective that can help us discern the connection

between desireB, drugs and writing* 7aking an e&plicit relation, Gilles

-eleuze writes in his book )6o 1eimes of $adnessthatA =with drugs, there

is something very uniue where desire directly in3ests the system of

perception= and alters its own causality, so that in the end the drug is taken 'or

its own sake*BD This moment, when the domain o' vital e&perimentation is

trans'ormed into the deadly e&perimentation is the turning point, which leads

to inevitable sel'#destruction and suicide* +t the same time, -eleuze insists

that 'or every addict there is a speci'ic issue o' uitting, meaning the addict =is

perpetually deto&i'ied=, but never (or seldom% really able to stop using the

drug*BFCountless attempts to somehow put an end to the sado#masochistic32>n the level o' the representation o' the body, there is a striking similarity between alldrawings, in sense that Csth never shows a whole body, but always a body in 'ragments*This mutilated corporeality could be another evidence o' an identi'ication process that is nothomogenous, but rather dispersed and disordered*331arthes, 3oland, ibid*, pp* @@*342nsisting that the concept o' desire is not to be con'used with 'eeling and subectivity,-eleuze argues that it is =a hecceity#the individual singularity o' day (***% not a thing or aperson=, but an event =de'ined by zones o' intensity, thresholds, degrees and 'lu&es=*-eleuze, ibid*, pp* B


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game with drugs are one o' the main elements that structure the narration o'

the diaryA the te&t becomessomething like a symptom o' an endless repetitive

movement, an unregulated choreoraphy of affectsthat cuts across the body

and is lounging 'or more se& and drugs* >n -ecember the Bth $@, Csth

writesA =@*D a*m* today 2 begin a new era in my li'e* i must give up my 7

habit 'or good and relegate use o' 4 to rare instances* 2n the last two days,

there have been symptoms indicating that my system craves a serious

increase in dosage* 2 must there'ore put an end to the perilous game*=B";et,

as the diary advances theperilous ameis played out until the very end when

he takes an overdose and dies near the ;ugoslavian border, trying to escape

to Hungary* >ne is tempted to see in this tragic epilogue some sort o' a

strange catharsis, the last act in the cruel theatre play o' mutilated)'ractured

identities*

Tracing the absent body

2' you allow me this comparison, Csth.s diary is 'or me something like a

mausoleum of desire, which had been imprinted on the sur'ace o' the paper

where it gained a ghost#like corporeality, suspended between images, letters,

numbers and all those gaps that have to be 'illed with the readers

imagination* 2t is worth saying it again that the body in uestion here is not to

be seen "as an agent of writing on its own behalf but as a vehicle of textual

self-figuration.For the writing of the body will die with the body but survive in

the writing of the diary."38Although Ross primarily refers in his book to gay

authors (Eric Michael, Tom Joslin, Herv Guibert, Derek Jarman), who were

dying of Aids, sinceCsth is also seriously ill, his diary might as well be

understood as a paradigmatic =autobiography o' dying=B$, in which the subect

37Csath, Geza, ibid*, pp* @*38

Chambers, 3oss, Facin It. Aids *iaries and the *eath of the &ub=ect, The Lniversity o'7ichigan 4ress, 7ichigan,$$!, pp* @*39Chambers, 3oss, ibid*, pp* D*

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records his physical and personal disintegration, while the reader is called to

witness this unbecomin* The traces o' the dying subect are, as we have

seen, present on every level o' the manuscriptO they constitute the verbal as

well as the visual level o' narration and they are closely related to 'eelings o'

unease, depression, identity crises and moral and physical decay due to

addiction* +lready on the @!th o' 7arch !$!, when Csth was only years

old, we read the 'ollowing sel'#re'le&ive observationA =2 am writing this diary

that deals with my illness because my illness didn.t allow me to (***%=


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topology o' this writing=@, since it is the relational dimension o' the sel' that

can help us situate identity and subectivity as result o' mediatization and play*

To apply a topological model o' identity will helps us to re'lect and 'ocus the

sel' not in static, 'i&ed or 'inished terms, but in a state o' 'lu&, becoming and

contingency* +t the same time, as it was clearly demonstrated in a te&t by

Mittoria 1orsU )opoloie als literatur6issenschaftliche $ethode: die &chrift

des 1aums und der 1aum der &chrift, the topological constellation o' the

subect has its roots in corporeality and the way the subect is inhabiting the

world with and through his body* 2n other words, 'rom a phenomenological

perspective it can be argued that the act o' writing displays how the subect

and his body are positioned in space, how the space is bodied and how the

body is spatialized*BThus, in addressing =the scene o' writing= as the event

o' inscribing the body into a sur'ace, it might become clear that writing the sel'

is not something 'i&ed, but is rather conceived as an unstable, insatiable play

with the body (o' his mother, his lovers and his own% that is 'ading away*

Turning our attention to ?acues -errida and his reinterpretation o' 6igmund

/reud, we would like to o''er one last point o' view concerning the constitution

o' sel' and subectivity in the case o' the diary manuscript o' Gza Csth* >'

peticular importance 'or our inuiry is the notion o' the pictoraphic script

-errida uses to a''irm an alternative model o' writing that e&ceeds the limits

and closures o' the logocentric#phonetic writing* +s a practice o' writing where

the image gains an eual status as the te&tual signi'ier, the hieroglyphic script

is a =1ilderschri'tA not an inscribed image but a 'igurative script, an image

inviting not a simple, conscious, present perception o' the thing itsel' #

assuming it e&ists # but a reading*=3eturning our gaze once more to Csth.s

manuscript and its mediality)materiality, it must be argued that it represents

precisely such a type o' scripture in which the visual element is not

subordinated to the te&tual, but they co#e&ist in dynamic inter(medial%play* +t

42-errida, ?acues, 7ritin and *ifference, 3outledge, 5ondon)Eew ;ork, @


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the same time, since the diary can be treated as an archive, mausoleum o'

desire, it comes into being by a process o' strati'ication, so that in the end the

reader 'ounds him)her sel' 'loating in a scripture with no de'inite routes or only

one trace to 'ollow* The result o' such an scattered, decentred and dissonant

practice is a collage 'illed with gaps, holes and empty spots where the subect

has vanished, leaving nothing but a trace o' (un%conscious play with the

phantom body o' the dead mother* >ne o' the main characteristics o' such a

play is the =iterantwork o' the trace=, the constant return o' the repressed,

which invites us to think o' =writing as breaching (***% breaking o' a path

against resistance, rupture and irruption becoming a route (***%, violent

inscription o' a 'orm, tracing o' a di''erence in a nature or matter which are

conceivable only in their oppositionto writing*=D

The 'racture that haunts the labour o' writing coincides with the multiple and

mutilated self,F whose identity can never be reconstructed in its originary

'orm, but always already caught in an endless movement o' de'erral and

delay* 2nstead o' trying to e&cavate one authentic, =real= Csth, the reader will

'ind him multiplied in a opulent game o' masuerade, staged in the in#

between zone o' te&t, colour, contour, spreadsheets, musical staves, photos

and memorabilia that destabilize any secure border between li'e, document

and 'iction* 8ven harder it will be to locate a stabile 'raming, which would

distinguish the rational 'rom the irrational, the 'act 'rom the dream and 'antasy*

+ny wish to somehow restore the originating presence 'rom which the

authentic and true sel' could be deduced is in this complicated theatre

impossible* 1orrowing again 'rom -errida, it can thus be saidA =The .subect.

o' writing does not e&ist i' we mean by that some sovereign solitude o' the

author* The subect o' writing is a system o' relations between strataA the

7ystic 4ad, the psyche, the world* 0ithin that scene, on the stage, the

punctual simplicity o' the classical subect is not to be 'ound*= "2t is in vain to

45-errida, ?acues, ibid*,pp* @F!#@F$*46 The corporeal dimension o' a delirious and hallucinatory model o' writing, which a''ects thewhole subect and is being per'ormed)played out with the whole body, is niceley re'lected inthe movie #pium, *iary of a $ad 7oman, by the Hungarian 'ilm director ?nos 6zszwhobased the 'ilm on Csth.s diary* /rom a gender oriented perspective it is signi'icant that thedirector atributed this kind o' scripture not to Csth himsel', but to his 'emale patient Gizella

:lein* Her writing is represented as an obssesive activity that does not stop on paper, bute&plodes and gets imprinted on walls, eventually really becoming an event o' spacing*47-errida, ?acues, ibid*, pp* @!D*

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search 'or a homogeneous and consistent sel', as the diary is not an uni'orm,

but a playground o' contradictions and (sel'%deceptions, a temporary utopia

where the subect withdrew himsel' to escape the horror 3acuio' reality and

the (petit% bourgeois order* 2n this cruel theatre without happy endings, one

only comes across a 'ragmented, dispersed and decentred sel', whose

a''ective per'ormance will come to stand still on the literal and real border*

2nstead o' writing some kind o' a conclusion that would sum up and repeat

the thesis and arguments e&posed above, 2 would like to 'inish this te&t with a

short comparison, which could help ;ou to, eventually, situate the problems,

uestions and dilemmas in a wider conte&t o' something 7arcus 1oon

designated as the %istory on 7riters on *rus*!+s there is not enough space

le't to elaborate more thoroughly on this subect, 2 shall very brie'ly make a

parallel with 0alter 1enamin, who (ust like Csth% conceived a 'ragmentary

diary where he protocolized his own e&periments with drugs* >ne o' the

common moments both Csth and 1enamin share$is the e&plicit 'ocus on

the corporeal dimension o' the drug e''ect, which enables the subect to enter

into a dream like state, where he is 'ree to enhance the ludic moment o'

e&istence and 'lee into a sa'e zone o' imagination and play* +lthough this

aspect o' 1enamin.s writing did not receive as much attention as it maybe

should have, it is interesting to note that in the 'rotocols, he outlines one

other uality o' the aura*D


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einem EormalbewuWtsein in enen .anderen. Xustand, den auch 6chamanen,

Heilige oder MerrRckte kennen* (***% -ie -roge macht 1enamin zu sinem

solchen 6chwellenwesen, um ihm die +nverwandlung an die -inge und das

sinnliche 8rleiden des 6to''lichen zu ermglichen*=D2n his own manner Csth

is embodying a similar concept o' the liminal selfhood torn apart between

rationality and the irrational, between the choice to be a doctor or rather to

play the role o' an artist* 2n this respect the diary practice is maybe e&actly

thisA a playground o' the liminal sel', whose borders can only be delinated

(and transcended at the same time% in a solitary act o' reading, that will

restore the 'lesh o' the ghost)author)subect and 'or a moment call him back to

li'e*

+ndre 7ircev

Illustrations:

516chRtte, Lwe, *ie 'oeti- des Extremen. Ausschreitun einer sprache des 1adi-alen,Mandenhoech K 3uprecht, Gttingen, @


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2llustration **

2lustration *@*

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2llustration *B*

2llustration **

Literature:

1arthes, 3oland, )he 'leasure of the )ext, Eew ;orkA Hill and 0ang, $"D

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1enamin, 0alter, ?ber %aschisch, no3elistisches, !erichte, $aterialien,/rank'urt a*7*A 6uhrkamp, $"@1oehm, Gott'ried, 7ie die !ilder &inn ereuen: *ie $acht des 8eiens,1erlinA 1erlin Lniversity 4ress, @7assachusetts)CambridgeA 72T 4ress, $$$1oon, 7arcus, A 1oad to excess. A %istory of 7riters on *rus,Cambridge)7assachussetsA Harvard Lniversity 4ress, @

diary as the playground of identity. andrej mircev

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