david low wild heart easy does it

7/29/2019 DAVID LOW Wild Heart Easy Does It

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www.simplybeing.co.uk JamesLow

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EasyDoesItTheheartofthedzogchenteachings

JAMES LOW

W I LD HEART GATHERING, EAST SUSSEX , UK

SEPTEMBER 2010

TRANSCRIBED AND EDITED BY SARAH ALLEN

Youcanalsolistentoarecordingofthistalkat

http://soundcloud.com/simplybeing


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Extracts:

Wearenotthecontentofourmindandyetweareinseparablefromthecontentofour

mind.Thecontentofourmindisexperience;itisnotself-definition;itisnotessence.Thus,ifyouhavebadtimes,thesebadtimesdontdefinewhoyouare.Ifyougetabit

crazyforawhileoryoufeelcollapsedorworthlessandlifelosesitsmeaning,ifyoucan

relaxandbewiththat,itthenpasses...

Itisveryimportantnottofeeltooincharge.Theworstpunishmentyoucangetinlife

istofeelthatitisalluptome.Thatisaverysadandlonelyplace.Actually,ourlifeisrevealedthroughbeingwithothers.Ourlifecomestous;isgiventouswhenwemake

thegestureofwelcomingit.Andsometimesthatishappyandsometimesitissadbutit

isarevelation;itisnotathingyoucanhangonto.Thisisreallythebasicheartofthe

dzogchenteachings;thattherearenothings,thereareonlymomentsofungraspableexperiencearisingwithintheopenfieldofawareness.Andthemoreweseethatwe

areintegratedinopenspaciousnessthemorethemomentsarefinejustastheyare.

Toopenandseewhatishereisthepuristformofphenomenology.Itisallowingthe

worldtobeasitisandallowingourselvestobeasweare.Youcouldsaythatthisisthe

basis of a profound non-violence. Although the desire to develop ourselves andincreaseourgoodqualitiesseemstobeabeautifulintention,itisactuallyalimiting

obscuration. For every time we have an idea of who we should be and we try to

becomethatidea,whatweareactuallydoingisengaginginviolenceagainsthowwe

are now. Weare saying:I amnot goodenough. I should bedifferent fromthis. IwouldbebetteroffifIwassomebodyelse.Thus,ourhopeofbettermentstartswith

anactofself-attack,tryingtotransformourselveswithoutevenseeingthenatureof

theonewewant to transform. Thehostilityof this attitude reinforcesourdualistic

structure:Iamtakingupapositionagainstmyselfinordertorecreatemyselfinawaythatwill getmore approval fromotherpeople andmyself.We are just likea little

mouse in a cage going round and round on an exercise wheel. There is no end to

developmentfortherearealwaysnewideasaboutwhoweshouldbe.Therefore,the

keythingistorelaxandopenandbepresentwithoneselfasoneis.

Wearehere,alivesosimplyattendtothatimmediatepresenceofawarenessthatis

our openground, the everpresentbasisofallour experience. Simply beaware,bepresentin,withandastheflowofexperience.Observehowmovement,agesturein

space and time is an expression or revelation of ungraspable presence. Our open

potentialshowsmanyforms,asselfandother,yetnoappearancedefineswhoweare.


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Contents:

Introduction ....................................................................................................................................... 2

Purificationanddevelopmentarealreadypresent ............................................................................. 2

Weliveinawebofstories.................................................................................................................. 3

Howcanwebeopentoeverythingthatoccurswithoutbeingoverwhelmed? ................................... 4

Remaininfiniteandopennotexistingasathing .......................................... ...................................... 5

Justbepresentwiththeworldasitisandourselvesasweare........................................................... 7

Whatwecallourselvesisamovementofdialogue............................................................................. 9

ThreeAameditation ...................................................................................................................... 11

Recognisingtheintegrationofstillnessandmovement ......................................... ............................. 12

Wisdomandcompassion:anaturalaestheticofconnectivity........................................ ..................... 14

Stayingwiththerawingredients ........................................ .......................................... ....................... 15

Questionsandresponses.................................................................................................................. 16


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Introduction

Wenowhavealittletimetogethertofindaparticularwayoflookingatourselvestoreveala

senseofthenatureofourownexistence. Iwillbetalkingaboutthisfromthepointofviewof

dzogchenwhichisanaspectofTibetanbuddhism.Dzogchenisnotconcernedwithelaborating

particularstructuresofbelieforformalpracticebutratherhelpsusdeconstructorletgoofsome

oftheknotsandlimitationsthatwecanfindourselvesboundinto.

Everybodyhasakindofagenda.Weliveinaverycommercialworldandinasenseweareall

sellingsomethingbasicallyweareselling:Iamaniceperson,youshouldlikeme.Wetryto

workoutwaysofdoingthat,findingournichemarketofthosewhomwecanconvincethatwe

areok.However,thisusuallyinvolvesrunninganumber,establishingarole.Thatistosay,we

becomeveryidentifiedwithaparticularaspectofourpersonalityorwayofbeing.Andthrough

thatidentificationtherecanbeanincreaseincompetenceand,also,perhaps,ofselfesteemor

easeofbeing.Yet,atthesametimewebecomediminishedbecauseweareidentifiedwitha

particularformationorconnection.Thatistosay,assoonaswetakeonashape,theverynature

ofthatshapewilldeterminethepossibilitiesofconnectionwithothershapes. Thus, themoretightlyformedwearewhichisoftenaqualitythatgoeswithconfidencethenarrowerthearea

ofinteractionwehaveintheworld.Ratherthandoingthis,thedzogchenwayoflookingatlife

suggests that we relax a littleandopen to theexperienceofourselves as participating in the

widestrangeofpossibleencounterswithotherpeople.Iwillunpackthisalittleandlaterwewill

dosomemeditation.

Purificationanddevelopmentarealreadypresent

IwouldliketostartwiththeideaofBuddha.BuddhaintheTibetanlanguageisexpressedas sang

gye.Thisismadeupoftwoterms:sangmeaningtopurifyandgyemeaningtoincrease.Wecan

takethatonaverybasiclevel,thinkingthatweveallgotproblems,difficulties,thingswedont

likeaboutourselveswhichweneedtopurify.Wecanalsorecognisethattherearegoodqualities

that we dont have that we might like to get; so then there is the issue of how to develop

ourselvesperhapsthroughcourses,workshopsandsoon.Thatisourgeneralculturalposition.

However,ofcourse,thereisadifficultyin thatbecausethereisnoend todevelopment.There

aremanyinterestingpeopleintheworldandweseethemandthink,Oh,Iwouldliketobeabit

morelikethat,orOh,howinteresting,IhadneverthoughtImightbeabletolearnthat, and

sothereisakindofextensionofourselvesoutofourselvestowardssomepossibilityofsomething

thatmightbeusefulandfulfilling.

However,fromthepointofviewofdzogchenthesetwoaspectsofpurificationanddevelopmentarealreadypresentinus.Itis justthatinourpreoccupations,inouridentificationwiththoughts

andideas,weoftendontrecogniseouractualsituation.Wecanexplorethisintermsoftwo

linkedaspects,stillnessandmovement.Whenwearejustsittingquietlybyourselveswearenot

necessarilystill;thereisusuallyquitealotgoingon.Therearesensationsinthebody,thoughts

andfeelings.Whoishavingthisexperience?Weare.Thatistosay,westand inrelationtoour

experiencewhichallowsustosaythingslike,Iamabittired,orIamhungry,or,Iamreally

interestedinthis.Wefindourselvesmakingcommentariesonourexperienceinwhichtheone

whoishavingtheexperienceistakenforgranted: Iamme,Iammyself.Andifyouhavebeen

aroundforafewyears,thatnotionofbeingyourselfgetsquitedeveloped:youhavealotof

memories,youhaveseengoodtimes,badtimes,youhaveseendoorsopeningandthenyouhave

seenthemclosing.Thus,thereisasense,veryoften,ofhavingtoprotectourselves;thatsomethings aregoodforus intheworldand someare ratherdangerous. Our ownsenseof selfis


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fragilebecauseinordertostayalivewehavetobeincontactwithotherpeople.Tobetouched

andmovedistheveryessenceofexistencebutinordertoprotectourselveswewanttocontrol

what touchesus and wewant to control how wearemoved. However, themorewedefine

ourselves,themorelimitedweareinourrepertoireofresponses.

Acentralpointhereistoexaminethewayinwhichwedefineourselvestoourselvesand,throughthat,tostarttoseehowotherpeopledefineustoourselves.Thatistosay,weliveinunceasing

feedback loops inwhich people like us or dont likeus, are amused by us or not, and these

responsesfromothersdontarisefromastablestateinthem,andnordotheygenerateastable

stateinus.Oursenseofselfandotherfluctuatesmomentbymomentasourmoodchangesand

theirmoodchanges.Itisveryeasytogetcaughtupinasecondorderreactivitytotheseshifts,

andtothink,Ohno,Ididthatwrong.Imusttryharder;theremustbeabetterwayofdoingit,

abetterwayofbeingme.HopefullyyoucanseeherethatthiscreatesasenseofImaworkin

progress.Icannotrest;thereisalwaysmoretodo,sothatatthecentreofourbeingisakindof

unformednesswhichfeelsabitanxietyprovoking: Ishouldbemoresorted.Welookaround

andseeotherpeopleandtheyallseemtobesorted.Weimaginethatmostpeoplehavegottheir

livestogetherandwelookatourselvesandthink,Ohno,Imallovertheplace.Theriskthenisthatwepretendtobemoresortedthanweare,developingapersona,animageofourselvesthat

wehopeothers,andweourselves,willbelievein.However,thiscreatesafamiliarproblem:an

image,ifitisheldinplace,isgoingtobearestrictionaswellasadefence.

Thisleadsustothecentralpointofhowtostartbeingpresentwithourselvesasourselvessothat

wecanberevealedtoourselvesbyourselvesdirectlyinthelivedmomentofourexperience,not

needinganyelaboratesystemfromoutside,andespeciallynotneedinganyonetotelluswhowe

are.Fromthetimewewereyoungwehavehadquitealotofpeopletellinguswhoweare;giving

usinformationabouttheformationofourselves.Andthattendstoleadtoasenseofbeinga

form,beingaparticularkindofpersonbutwhoistheonewhoishavingthisexperience?

Weliveinawebofstories

Herewearesittingtogetherandweareallbreathinginandoutwearealive.Presumablyyou

havethoughts,feelingsandsensationsatthisverymoment.Whoistheonewhoisexperiencing

thesethoughts, feelingsand sensations? Normally wesay, I am. I know I am alive because

thingsarehappeningtome.Thus,thefactthatIfeeltheimpactofthingscomingintome,onto

me, and as it were, out ofme towardstheworld, affirms the basic integrity ofmy existence.

However,whatwemightseeis thatthisis justanarrative,a story. Iamusinglanguagetotell

myself about who I am as if I exist as a lubristic, hubristic phenomenon the first person

singular: I amme. I ammyself. Although these statementsseem tobepointing towardssomethingwhichtrulyexists,infacttheyarecreatingtheillusionofsomething.

Forexample,ifIsay, Thisismywatch,thatisaveryordinarykindofstatement.Iamholdingin

myhandsomethingwhichwecanallrecognise,forthisisawatchandwehaveseenwatches

beforeastheyarepartofourworld.Wetakethewatchnessofthewatchforgranted.However,

howdoeslanguageconnectwithreality?Thethinginmyhandseemstobecaughtbytheword

watch.Thatistosay,whenIsaywatch,thewordseemstohaveadirectrelationshipwithwhat

isinmyhand.However,thewatchnessofthewatchisaculturalconceptthatbelongstousifwe

havebeeninitiatedintothecultofknowingaboutwatches.Whenchildrenaretwoorthreeyears

ofagetheyknowthatthisisashinyobjectandwanttoputittheirmouthormaybestickiton

theirheadorputitonalittlecaranddriveitaround.Lateron,bythetimetheyaresix,sevenoreighttheyarestartingtohaveanideaoftimeandthentheystarttolearntotellthetime.Thus,


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eachofthesestagesisaninitiationintoawayofreadingaphenomena.Thatistosay,without

theconceptofwatchwhatwouldthisbe?

Weliveinaweboflanguage,awebofstories;storieswhichcanbeverybeautiful,veryterrifying,

frightening,depressing,anxietyprovokingandsoon. Andourverysenseof self,initsordinary

movement,is largelyalinguisticcreation. That istosay, Iamtheonewhoisrevealedbythestories I tell about myself, and by the stories other people tell about me. We come into

existence as as ourselvesaccording to theparticular shapings ofanenvironment, andat the

sametimethisconstitutivemovementofwords,thoughtsandfeelingsisbeingexperienced.This

presenceisnotthepresenceofsomethingelse,itisexactlywhoweareandyetisimpersonalin

thatitisnotdefinedbyanyofthemomentaryappearanceswetakeourselvestobe.Thereisan

awareness which, like amirror, revealswhat isarising. For example, whenweget up in the

morningwecleanourteethandlookinthemirror.Whatweseeisourselves;whatwedontsee

isthemirror.Thatistosay,weseethereflectionandwetakethereflectiontobeatrueaccount

ofwhoweare.However,themirrornessofthemirror,itscapacitytoshowwhoweare,isnot

determinedbytheimagethatisinit.Ifthatwasso,whenthefirstupinyourhouseholdwentto

lookinthemirrortheirfacewouldgetfixedintoitsothatthenextpersonwhowentintothebathroomwould see someoneelsesface andwouldnotbe able to see themselves. The very

natureofamirroristhatitfillsitselfandemptiesitself,anditdoesthatbecauseitdoesnthave

anyfixedcontentofitsown.Thatistosay,itistheemptinessortheopennessofthemirrorthat

allowsittoshowmany,manydifferentimages.

Howcanwebeopentoeverythingthatoccurswithoutbeingoverwhelmed?

Sincewewere borneach ofushasbeenmany,many differentpeople:happy,sad,expansive,

contracting,fullofjoy,fulloffearsandanxietiesandsoon.Thesestateswhichwereus,thatwe

werefullyidentifiedwithandwhichwereextremelyrealinthemoment,werecontingent.Thatis

tosay,theyaroseinrelationtootherthingsthatweregoingon.AsfarasIcantellwedonthave

anycoreessence,athinginsideuswhichdoesntchangewithcircumstances.Ihavebeenlooking

forthatforaverylongtimeandIhaveneverfoundit.Youcanalsolookforyourselftoseeifyou

can find the thingnessof yourself as anenduring entity. Moreover, that absenceof a fixed

defining essence is actually the potential to reveal ourselves, to be revealed as ourselves, by

circumstances.Forexample,ifyoucometoameetingplacelikethisandyoudontknowanyone

youmightfeelabitlonely,sadorintimidated,andthensomefriendlypersonsays, Hello,good

morning,andyousuddenlyfeelabitbetter.Youfeelthewarmthoftheirgestureofconnection

andyourmoodshifts.Isthatyourexperience?Howyouwerebefore,whichfeltexactlyhowyou

were,whereyouwereperhapsthinking, OhgodwhydidIcomehere?suddenlychangedand

you felt, Oh, this isok. In this,we can see howmomentaryidentificationwith statesis theongoingexperienceofhowweareintheworldwithothers.However,ifwetakeourselvesasa

fixedpoint,likeafixedself,thenweendupfeelinglikeacorkonthewaveswhichisliftedupand

droppeddownbyevents.Andthatisveryexhaustingbecausesomuchishappeningtousinthe

course of a day. Therefore, how can we be open to everything that occurs without being

overwhelmed,stressedoutandworndown?Thisisanimportantissueinmodernlifewhenthere

aresomanydemands,somanyformsofcommunicationcomingatusallthetime.

Fromthepointofviewofdzogchenthemainissueistorelaxandtoopen.Thismeanstoletgoof

our tendency to overidentify, to concretise, to reify, and to take as permanent and reliable,

experiencewhichisactuallyephemeral. Youcannotcatchthemoment. Herewearetogether

andIhavestartedtalking.Iwilltalkalittlebitmoreandthenthiswillbeoverandsomethingelsewillbegin.Everchangingexperiencecannotbeblockedorfrozen.Earlieryouweresleeping.You


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thenwokeup,thenyouhadpee,thenyouhadsomebreakfast,nowyouarehere,andsoonyou

will bedoing something else. This isour life. It is a continuous flow of experience which is

ungraspableandinfinitelyvariegated.

Onecommonresponsetothisistotrytoimposeasenseoforder.Ihavetobeincontrolofmy

life.IneedtoworkoutwhatisgoingonandifpossibleIwanttomakeithappenonmyterms. However,thisgeneratesalotofstressbecause,ofcourse,wearenotinchargeofourexistence.

Moreover, we cocreate our lives with other people; our very existence is participative and

throughbeingpartofwhatisgoingonwefindourselvesrevealedtoourselves.Wedontexistas

anythingbeforewemanifest.Wemightthink,Yes,butIhavelotsofmemories,Iknowwhatmy

lifehasbeenandIknowwhatIamlike.However,thatisjustanidea.Wecouldgetintopairs

and I couldaskyou to introduce yourselvesto yourpartner and you would start to tellthem

something.Youmaytellthemwhereyouwereborn,whatyoudoorwhatkindoffoodyoueat.

Thatis tosay,youwouldconstructsomekindofstory. Youcoulddothatforfiveminutes,five

hoursorfiveyearsbutwouldyougettotheendofthenumberofstoriesyoucouldtellabout

yourself?Evenwhileyouweretellingthemyourstory,thetellingofitisitselfisanewexperience

soyouwouldthenhavetocommentontheexperienceyouarehaving,andthenwouldhavetocomment on the comment and soon. There is noend to storytelling. There is no end to

thoughtorfeelingorsensation.Theseareceaselesswavesofstuffthatgoonandonandon.So,

isthereawaytoavoidgettinglostinthis?

Remaininfiniteandopennotexistingasathing

Wehavetwopossibilitiesashumanbeings.Oneistobesmallandtheotheristobebig.Weall

knowwhatitisliketobesmall;wegetahitbylife,wefeelabitcrushedandwestarttoshrink.

Wefeelabitanxious,wedontwanttoanswerthephoneandmaybewedontwanttoopenour

letters;wemightnotevenwanttogetoutofbeditallfeelstoomuch.Inthatexperience,the

world seems very, very big and we are small; we are a thing and there are lots of thingssurroundingme,moreof themthanme,andtheykeepwhackingintome.Everythingiscomingat

usandwejustwanttosay,Goaway.Leavemealone.Thisisaterriblestatetobein.Fromthe

buddhistpointofviewthiswayofexperiencingeventsexemplifiestheprimarydelusion:thatwe

areathing,athingamongthings.ItseemsobviousthatIamavulnerablethingandthereforeI

havetoprotectmyselfandincreasemybenefit.Duetothisbeliefwearealwaystryingtopush

awaybadthings,tofindoutwhatisgoodforusandgetmoreofit.Wespendanawfullotofour

livesdoingthis,checkingout:Isthisgoodforme?Isthisnotgoodforme?DoIlikethis?DoI

notlikethis?Itgoesonandonandon.

Butwhatis thissmall self? Wefeel abit afraid. What isthat fear? It issomethingwhich is

arising. Itwasnt there beforebutdue to specific causes andcircumstanceswearesuddenlyafraid.Inthismomentthefear seemstobewhowearebutwewerentlikethatbefore.Thatis

tosay,weloseourselvesintothemomentsothateachmomentseemstodefinewhoweare.

Thus,ifwehaveagooddayoragoodspellinourlifewhereeverythinggoeseasywetendto

think, Hey,notsobad.Andthenthecausesandconditionschangeandlifebecomesdifficult

andwethink,Howcouldthisbepossible?Iwashappybefore.Ihavedonesomanyworkshops.

I have done my yoga andmeditation and yet now I feel like shit again. How can this be

possible? Well...itispossiblebecausethereisnowallbetweenourselvesandtheworld;weare

partoftheworld.Andsometimestheworldissmilingandsometimesitisnot.Dreadfulthings

happenintheworldandifweareatallhumanwearegoingtobeaffectedbythat.Thequestion

is:canwestayopentobeingmovedandchanged,whichistheaspectofparticipation,without

beingblownhitherandthitheratthemercyofexperiences?Theanswertothatistoremainbig.

Sowhatdoesthatinvolve?


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Verybigmeansunlimited,infinite.Itmeansnotexistingasathingwhichhasabeginning,anend,

a top and a bottom, which has a fixed shape. That is rather different to how we normally

experience ourselves, yet we dont have to do anything special to avail ourselves to it. Our

infinitenatureisthereby itself,itisnottheresultofanyeffortbyourselvesorothers.Weare

here,alivesosimplyattendtothatimmediatepresenceofawarenessthatisouropenground,

theeverpresentbasisofallourexperience.Simplybeaware,bepresentin,withandastheflowof experience. Observe how movement, a gesture in space and time is an expression or

revelationofungraspablepresence.Ouropenpotentialshowsmanyforms,asselfandother,yet

noappearancedefineswhoweare.

However,oursmallselfisvulnerabletobeingdefinedbyothers,andindeedcravesdefinitionasa

way of establishing identity. The ego develops itself through fusing with key events and

developingasenseoffunctionallimit.Forexample,mostchildren,fromtimetotime,experience

difficultiesatschool. Theycanfindthatsomesubjectsareabithardforthemandthisisoften

distilledintoasensethatIcant:Icantdolanguages, Icantdomathsandsoon.This

beliefthenactsasthedefinitivestorylinewhichinfluencesallthechoicesthataresubsequently

made. If we have grown up in a family where there wasnt much tenderness or love, thenbleaknessandabandonmentbecomesaterritorythatwe canvisitagainandagain.Orwemay

have had a lot of intrusion from other people and had to adapt to their demands. We can

becomesocompliantthatitisdifficulttoworkoutwhoweare. Therearemanywaysinwhich

wecangetoffbalanceinourinteractionswithotherpeopleandwithourselvesbecausewelook

forafixedpointofbalance,areassuringcertainty,goodorbad.Howeverthepointofbalanceis

everchanging in the dynamic field of emergent experience. We lose our fresh presence by

maintainingstorylinesaboutourselveswhicharelimitingandpartial.However,becausetheyare

habitualthey seemtobeexpressingsomedeepanddefiningtruthaboutourselves,andsowe

tendtoclingtothemwithoutexaminingiftheyareaccurateorevenuseful.

Thuswemight take our present good health for granted. Yet inside uswehave all kinds ofincrediblycomplicatedsystemswhichcangowrong:wecouldhaveastroke,developcancerand

soon.Ourpresentstatecaneasilychange.WhatwetaketobedefinitiveofwhoIam,thefixed

beliefswhichweinhabit,isnotreliable.Allkindsofinternalwindsandexternalwindscanblowus

around,forouridentityisnotanessencebutachangingformmanifestingwithinthedynamic

causalfieldofappearance.

SowhatisthestatusofthesestatementsItellmyselfaboutwhoIam?Dotheyreallydefinean

essence?Oraretheypartsoftheongoingprocessofmeaningmaking,partswithwhichwehave

becomeparticularlyidentified.Forexample,youmightthink,Idontlikemyselfverymuch,and

Idontthinkotherpeoplewilllikeme.Thatbelief,thatidentificationwithconcepts,islikelyto

makeyousociallyanxious.Youaregoingtoavoidopportunitiesbecauseyoubelievetheoutcomeisalreadydetermined.Becauseofthepreoccupationwiththatstate,youprobablywontcheck

out what is happening in the world. You dont really knowwhether people like you or not

because it wouldbe too scary to ask them. Imagining that they dont like you, you create a

defensivebarrierofavoidance.Therootofallthispainfulandunnecessaryactivityisthebelief

thatIamafixedandknowableentity.

The view of dzogchen suggests that we simply release identification and, abiding in easy

relaxation, see the creation of ourselves momentbymoment. Without interfering simply

observealltheconstituentsofourbeingastheyariseandpass.Intheirflowtheymakeparticular

patterns,abitlikeachildturningakaleidoscope.Somethingisthereandthen...turn...andthereis

something different. Moreover, due to our conditioning, for most of us there are not many

constituent parts; we have a repertoireofmoves that, in their repetition, establish our fairly

standard personality. Themorewe see thedynamic flow rather than fixating onour familiar


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beliefs, we see how, according to circumstances different aspects of our personality come

forwardaseachnewreformationofourselfcomesintobeing.

Throughlookingclearlywestarttoseethatoursituationisdynamic.AllthatItakemyselfandmy

world to be is changing in its phenomenological immediacy. Concepts create the illusion of

continuity. Eachmoment ispresent yet ungraspable. Whatever I take anymoment to be istransientandcontingent.Thusmyexistenceisnotsomethinginside methatcomesoutofme

intotheworld.Actually,IdontknowwhoIamuntilIrevealmyselfinactivity,andeachtimeI

appear, I amsomebodynew. This isamazingbecause itreveals ourpotential as foreverfree.

Insteadoflookingtofindadefinitiverecipeinsideourselves,westarttoseethatwearecalled

intobeingbythesituationsweparticipatein,thatwearetrulycoemergentwiththeother,that

ourselfissomethingwhichispartofacobecomingwithotherpeople.Forexample,ifpeopleare

warm towardsuswebecome,wemanifest, in a corresponding way, and if they are coldwe

becomeinadifferentway.Thereisnofixitytoourmanifestation.Thefactthatwearesoeasily

influencedpointstothepossibilityofinfluencingothers,ofbehavinginawaythatelicitsthemost

openandconnectedaspectsoftheother.Fromthebuddhistpointofviewthisistheaspectof

compassion,anattitudewhichwarmstheworldthroughcontact.

Aswebecomemoreopentootherpeopleweallfeelabitmorerelaxed.Graduallywecometo

haveconfidencethatlifeiseasierwithoutprotectivebarriers.IfIcanonlymovetowardsyouif

youfitintomymapoftheworldthenIamusingyoutoreaffirmmybeliefs.Yourhabitsconfirm

myhabitsandtogetherweliveinalovelypaddedprison.Itmaybecomfortableforawhile,butit

isfantasythatisrestrictiveandwhichwontlast.Here,atthisevent,peoplearriveatthefield,

tentsgoup,somethingiscreatedforafewdays,andthenitisgone.Andthisisthepatternofour

livesmomentbymoment.Weputupthetentofthemorning,takeitdownatnoonandputup

thetentoftheafternoon.Thenintheeveningweputupthetentofsleep.Inthatwaywelivein

eachoftheselittleenvironmentsasiftheyweretherealthing,andthentheyaregone.

Justbepresentwiththeworldasitisandourselvesasweare

Sowhoistheonewhoishavingthisexperience? Therearemany,manybuddhistteachingson

thispointbutexperientiallyitisnotsodifficult,forthekeypracticeisjusttoobserveourselvesin

theverymomentofbecomingourselves.Theonewhoisobserving,inordertoobserve,cannot

haveanagenda.Itcannotbelookingfor somethingotherwiseitisonlygoingtofindwhat itis

lookingfor.Therefore,theobserverhastorelax,letgoofallassumptions,receivewhatisthere

andseeclearly.

Thissimpletaskcanbeespeciallydifficultinourmodernworldbecausewetendtoberewardedforbeingactive.Fromanearlyageweareencouragedtobelievethatwehavetomakeourlives

bydoingthings.Byfindingoutwhatisgoingonandcontrollingitweseemtovalidateourselves,

strengthenourenergyandcreatemeaning.Ontheotherhand, thatveryactivity,becauseit is

intentional,operatingwithinapreexistingframeofreference,installsaforeclosure.Wethinkwe

arebeingopen,becauseweknowwhatwewant,butthiscarriesaclosure.Forexample,ifyou

run out of flourwhile you are baking and you nip into a shop just to get flour, you are not

interestedinanythingelseinthatshop.Itisveryimportantthatyougettheflouryettheshop

has manyother possibilities. In the sameway, themorewebecome wedded to a particular

pattern,aparticularshape,theselectiveattentionwhichmaintainsitistakenforgrantedandis

difficulttorecognise.Therefore,thefirstthingistoexploreforyourselftherelationshipbetween

relaxationandopenness,andtopracticereceivingor seeingwhatisthere.Aslongaswekeep


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lookingforasuccessionofparticularthings,weblockoutthehappenstanceincidentswhichcan

stopusinourtracksandeaseusfromourburdens.

Toobserveourselvesistoadoptthestanceofnotknowinganything. Themoreyouknow, the

morethatknowledgewilldeterminehowandwhereyoulook.Therefore,thepracticeissimply

torelaxandbepresentwithwhatisgoingon.Thenwestarttoobservehowquicklywecloseourpotentialdown,howquicklywegetcaughtupintheknotsandprejudicesandassumptionswhich

giveus thesenseofthisishowIam. Forwearehabituatedtobelieveinsomething;wewant

andneedtobesomething.Thus,lookingforourtrueself,lookingforourbuddhanature,looking

tofindoutwhowereallyare,setsusoffonawildgoosechase. Thatistosay,itisalreadythe

wrongkindofquestionbecauseitisassumingthatwhatwewillfindissimplyabetterversionof

whowearenow:Itwillbemewithoutanxiety,withoutdepression,withoutworries.Iwilljust

beamorecool,relaxedchilledversionofme.

Withthatpointofviewwetrytoeditandimproveourexistingsenseofself.Therearemany

peopleofferingworkshopsonhowtoeditourstory,tointroducenewsymbolsintoitorenrichit

with techniques and skills. However, we have to be very careful and see how easily weareseduced,enchanted,mesmerisedbystorylines.Byobservingourselveswithanopennessfreeof

hopesandfearswestarttoseethemainpersonwhocheatsusisourselves.Forwhenwethink

weareopentoseeingwhatisthere,weareactuallylookingforsomethinginparticular.Weare

lookingforapproval,lookingtobegood,lookingtohaveanicestorytotellotherpeople,looking

tomoveupthestagesofthepathsothatwecanberewardedbyotherpeopleandbeseenas

beingaproperkindofperson.Therearesomanyculdesacsleadingoffthepathofopenness.

Theyallhavethesamenature;theyseektofindsomethingthatcanbefound.

Toopenandseewhatishereisthepuristformofphenomenology.Itisallowingtheworldtobe

asitisandallowingourselvestobeasweare.Youcouldsaythatthisisthebasisofaprofound

nonviolence.Althoughthedesiretodevelopourselvesandincreaseourgoodqualitiesseemstobeabeautifulintention,it isactuallyalimitingobscuration.Foreverytimewehaveanideaof

whoweshouldbeandwetrytobecome that idea,whatweare actually doing isengaging in

violenceagainsthowwearenow.Wearesaying: Iamnotgoodenough.Ishouldbedifferent

fromthis.IwouldbebetteroffifIwassomebodyelse.Thus,ourhopeofbettermentstartswith

anactofselfattack,tryingtotransformourselveswithoutevenseeingthenatureoftheonewe

wanttotransform.Thehostilityofthisattitudereinforcesourdualisticstructure: Iamtakingup

apositionagainstmyselfinordertorecreatemyselfinawaythatwillgetmoreapprovalfrom

otherpeopleandmyself. You can see how knottedthat quicklybecomes asassumptionand

effortenergiseeachother.Wearejustlikealittlemouseinacagegoingroundandroundonan

exercisewheel. Thereisnoendtodevelopmentfortherearealwaysnewideasaboutwhowe

shouldbe.Therefore,thekeythingistorelaxandopenandbepresentwithoneselfasoneis.

Wewanttomoveoutofjudgement,outofaspiration,outofintention,andbejustlikeamirror,

openandclear,revealingwhateveristherewithoutinterfering.

Interfering, or thewilltopower, thedetermination tomake things happen thewaywewant

themto,isnotabadqualitybutitneedstobeappliedintherightplace.Sharpknivesarevery

useful ina kitchen,butyou dont reallywant tomeet adrunkenteenagercarrying onein the

street at night, becausethat is thewrong place fora sharp knife. Inthesameway, having a

determinationtoachievesomethingis themanifestationof ourenergyin theworld,andif itis

attuned through participation withothers it can bevery helpful. However, if you apply it to

yourselftotrytodeterminewhoyouare,allyoudoisturnyourselfintoakindofclaywhichyou

thenfindtobethewrongshape.Thenyouarecondemnedtoendlesslykneadingandsqueezing

ittobringitintothepropershape butthepropershapeforwhat? Theobserver,awareness,

ourownimmediatepresenceisnotathing.Itisthegroundofmanifestationinthatitilluminates


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allthatappears,yetitisitselfneveranappearance.Toseeourselvesistobeourselvesaspure

being,whichisitselfinseparablefromyetneverconditionedbyourceaselessrevelationofbeing

this,thenthis,thenthis.

Weliveinaworldwithotherpeopleandwhatwecandoisdeterminedbyourownandothers

ideas.Whatisoktodoattwentyisnotwhatyoucandowhenyouareforty,andwhenyouaresixtyyoucannotdowhatyoudidwhenyouwereforty.Ateachstageoflifewefunctionwithin

systemsofexpectation.Evenwhenweresistothersexpectationsofuswestillactwithinlimiting,

definingassumptions.Weliveinasocietywherewearegoingtohavealotofoldpeople,andyet

wehavea culturewhich isratherdismissiveofoldpeople,inwhichthereisverylittlesenseof

howtobeold.Beingoldmeansknowingfirstofallthatyouarenotyoung:Iamnottwentyone

anymoresoIcannotdowhatpeopleoftwentyonedo.Overthehill...pastmypeak...sunsethere

Icome.Thiscouldbetakenasaninsultingdismissal,adenialofallwehavebeen,yetitisalsoan

invitationtorecognise thatrealchangeshaveoccurred. Theseemingcontinuityofourselfasa

coreessenceisanillusionthatleads togriefwhenweexperiencethat,Icannolongerdothe

thingsIusedto.ItisasifbysayingIacontinuityofsubstanceiscreatedsothattheonewho

coulddothemthenandtheonewhocannotdo themnowweretheselfsameperson. Yetthepast is gone, who we were no longer exists. What we are now is both the unconditioned

opennessofourawarenessandthepreciseformofourcurrentmanifestation. Itisthenatural

integrationofthesetwoaspectswhichisourbasicfreedomratherthantheillusionoffreedom

embeddedinstrivingtomaintainaformwhosetimehasgone.

Eachformisjustwhatitis,anillusory,ungraspablemanifestationthatcanbemanipulatedbythe

controllingegooracceptedinopenpresencebyawareness.Eachseasonoflifeoffersthesetwo

options.Acceptanceandparticipationwithwhatisactualisthebasisforpractice.Intheageing

process,acceptanceofourseasonisfreedom.Thereissomethingtolearnineachseason.Outof

thenothing,theemptinessofwinter,comesthefullnessofsummerwhich,inevitably,becomes

theemptinessofwinter. Thepulsationbetweenthe turn towardsformandthe turn towardsemptinessiscontinuous,witheachturnillustratingtheillusorynatureofeachaspect,fortheyare

inseparableinnonduality.Theouterleveloftheseasons,theinnerchangesofourownageing,

andthesecretfluctuationsofourthoughts,feelingsandsensationsarenotseparatedomains.All

manifestationhasthesamegroundandthesamenature:emptyappearancelikerainbowsinthe

sky,likesummermirages,likethereflectionsofthemoononwater.

Autumnisaboutreception,itisaboutlettinggosothattheearthreceivestheleavesandfruit;it

isaboutsinkingbacktothesource.Releasingthefixationonformisalsopartofthepracticeof

meditation, aswe leave the egos fantasy domain of the neverending growth of spring and

summer.Theegocannevergetenough:themoreitsetsinmotionthemoreithastodo,abit

likethestoryofthesorcerersapprentice.Inmeditationwemoveintoadifferentseason,awayfromtheegosdesireforendlesssummerandintothespaciousnessofwinter.Thisistheterrain

revealedbyreleasingand relaxing,emptyingoutourassumptionsand letting goof all thatwe

know.

Whatwecallourselvesisamovementofdialogue

ButwhowillIbeifIhavenothing?Wellthatiswhatwehavetofindout.ButIdontwantto

investigatemyself,IjustwanttobethemeIknowIam!Why?BecauseIknowhowtodoit

and because I know that itmakes sense. That is the pointwherewe decide to stay in our

familiarhabitualnarrative,ourstoryline,which,again,iscosy.Itisnotbad,itcanbeuseful;itisjust thatit is limited. Wewillneverexperienceourunlimitednature ifwekeep identifyingwith


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whatislimited.Thus,thereisakindoftrustthatisinvolvedinlettinggooftheforminorderto

experienceourselvesasformless,asshapeless.Outofthisformlessnessmanyformsarise.Thisis

the paradox that out of nothing comes everything, yet when we cling to something it keeps

slippingaway. It has alwaysbeenlikethis. Thisis the fact ofour lives;it isnot somekind of

abstracttheory.

Forexample,youwereoncefiveandwhenyouwerefiveyoudidthingsyoudidntdolaterwhen

youwereten.Andwhenyouwerefifteenyouwerentdoingthethingsyouweredoingat ten.

Eachofushasbeenthroughthat;wehavebeenmanydifferentpeople.Thatisafact.Now,you

couldaddalltheseexperiencestogetherlayerafterlayerlikeahugelasagne: Thisismylife;this

ishowitis,oronecansee Wheream Ialive?...onlyhere...onlynowinthistransientpointof

infinitedissolving.Itishappeningmoment-by-moment.Somethingnewishappeningandall

thathashappenedhasgoneandallthathasnthappenedyethasntarrived.Thatistosay,if

westaywiththeimmediacyofexperienceratherthanelaboratinganarrative,weseethatallwe

haveisthismoment.Theverytransienceofallthethingsthathavehappenedcanhelpussee

thatthismomentwillalsogo,andthatthereforethismomentcannotbeourtrueessence.This

moment cannot define who we truly are, it can only show how, here and now, we arecontextuallyrevealed.

Ourmanifestationisthedisplayorthemovementofourenergyintheworldwithothers.But

wheredoesitcomefrom?Youcouldsayfromgod,youcouldsayfromkarma,oryoucouldlook

directlyandsee:wheredoyouarisefrommomentbymoment?Wheredoesthisworldcome

from?YoucouldstudyCharlesDarwinoryoucouldjustbepresentwithyourself.Everythingis

happening butwhat isthegroundofthat happening? Wewontget to it bya storybecause

storiescoverthegroundintheveryactoftryingtorevealit.Theworldisfullofstoriesabout

wherewecame from. Every culturehas some kindofprimordial foundationmythaboutgods

comingdownonaladderorapieceofclaybeingbreathedintoandsoon.Morelocallywealso

havethestoriesofourfamilies;ourparentsandgrandparents.Throughtherapywecancometoseehowourpersonalitieshavedevelopedwiththefamilymatrix.Thiscanhelpgenerateamore

supportivestory.Butitisstillastory.

Thequestion,then,istolookatthismomentandseewheredoesitcomefrom?Forexample,at

themomentIamspeakingandwordsarecomingoutofme.Thereisnowordfactoryinsideme;I

donthavealittlescriptthatIampullingoutofmytonguelikeakindofectoplasm.Iamspeaking

withyou.HereIam,Ilookaround,Iseeyourfacesandthewordscomeoutofmymouthand

afterawhiletheywillstop.Thatiswhatbeinghumanis.Wheredoesthiscomefrom?Itcomes

fromourbeingtogether.Thewordsonlyhavemeaningifyouarehere.PerhapsIcouldbecome

likeoneofthesedrivenpreachers,Icouldbringalongmysoapboxandputitinthefieldwiththe

cowsandtellthemthegoodnewsandtheholytruth,buttheresnotmuchpointtothat.Thatis

tosay,weemergeinsituations.Andwecanonlydothatifweareopentothesituation;not

havingsomethingtosell,nothavinganagenda.Ofcourse,wehavemanymicroagendasand

theyarepartofthemixbuttheycanalsolimitourintentionandavailability.Byopeningtoallthe

availableingredients,allthepotentialresources,wecanrelaxandallowthecoemergenceofself

andotherastemporarygestures.Ifwestarttoexperiencetheimmediacyandunpredictabilityof

our coemergence with the environment, the actuality of the nonduality of self and other,

subject and object, thenwedontneed to beso afraid, forwesee that it isnotallupto us.

Actually,otherpeoplewillgiveuswhatweneed.Theygiveusasmileoranodorafrownandwe

arethereinthatmomentwiththem.

There is an enormous loneliness in living inside oneself. Our education and human culture

generally encourages a kind of mentalisation, a sense that we live inside ourselves, maybe,

indeed,inourheadsasabunchofideas:IhaveamentalexistenceandIhavetoworkouthow


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tomoveoutfrommyselfintotheworldwhereyouguysliveyou guysarealreadyoutthere in

theworldbutIaminme.Thatiswhatmostofusexperience:welookoutofoureyes,welisten

outofourears,toallthisstuffwhichisalreadygoingon,withthefeelingofhowdowegetinto

it?

This is, ofcourse, anillusion. Inbuddhism this isthe foundational illusion of believing intheessentialdualityofselfandother,subjectandobject.Thatistosay,thesenseofwehasbeen

torn apartby thehabit of ignoringwhat is there andassuming a fundamentalseparationand

differencebetweenmeandyou.Thisleadsuseachtoapreoccupationwithourownideas,our

owninternalstuff.Actually,weareallinthistogether;wearebornintotheworldaspartofthe

world;we are alwaysparticipatinginbeingwithothers. Andtherefore, howwe are, including

whatwetaketobeinsideourselvesourthoughts,feelings,sensationsandsoonarecreated

outofthepresenceofothers.Ifyougooffforawalkonyourowninthewoodsthingswillbe

arising, as it were, internally, but they arise in relation to something else. Perhaps there are

memoriesofbeingtherebeforewithafriendwhoisnottherenow.Thereissomestoryofthis

andthat,andcertainfeelingsarise.Thatistosay,youareininteraction;wedonthaveasingular

self.Whatwecallourselvesisamovementofdialogue,amovementofenergygoingoutandenergycomingin.

ThreeAameditation

Iwillnowshowyouaverysimplyformofsittingwhichcanopenupsomeofwhatwehavebeen

talkingabout.Thefunctionofthepracticeistointegratestillnessandmovement,andbecause

we tend to becaughtupin movementa lot of the time, inthepractice wetendto privilege

stillness.Thisdoesntmeanthatmeditationisprimarilyaboutaretreatorwithdrawal;ratheritis

toexplorethesiteorthepointfromwhichyouhaveexperience.

Atfirstwesitina quietwaybutafterawhileyoucancontinuethisasyouaremovingaround,

participatinginwhateverishappening:talking,eatingandsoon.Thepracticeisnotaboutdoing

something different but rather awakening to your own nature. The whole function of this

practiceisnottomakeanythingartificial;ratheritistofindanaturalpointofrelaxedopenness

which allows whatever is occurring to occur without interference. With whatever appears,

includingallthatyoutaketobeyourself,letitbeasitis.

Youcantrythiswithyoureyesopenorclosed.However,generally,wedoitwithourgazeopen

intothespaceinfrontofus. Ifyoucloseyoureyesitcangivethesenseofbeing,asitwere,in

oneself,asifthisiswhoIam.Whereas,whatIhavebeenattemptingtosharewithyouisthat

whoweareisallofthistogether;allthatisoccurringmomentbymomentishappeningallatonce.Forthisreason,inthistradition,weusuallydothepracticewithourgazeopen.Wearenot

staringatanythingbutourgazeisgentlyfocusedabouttwoarmslengthinfrontofus.Weease

ourselvesintothespacesothatwearenotstaringoutandwearenotgoinghazy.Wearejust

relaxedandopen.Andthen,toreleasethetensionsandthewaysinwhichwearecaughtupin

identificationwiththoughtsandfeelings,wejustmakeaneasysound,usuallymakingthesound,

Aa.Youcandoitonthesilentoutbreathifyouareatworkandyouneedsomespace,buthere

wecanmakethesoundAathreetimes.

Aa in the tradition represents openness, the nature of the mind and the ground of all the

buddhas.Itreleaseseverythingwithoutestablishinganything.Aaasasoundisheldtobethe

basisof allothersounds. IntheSanskritandTibetanalphabetsalltheconsonants take Aaastheirvowelandsothereisasensethatallwordsandconstructionsarisefromit.Thus,Aaisthe


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pointofelaborationintoalllanguage,allwords,allnaming,butalsothepointwheretheycanall

becollapseddownintosilence.AndthatiswhatwedoaswesayAa;weletallourconstructions

dissolveintoemptiness.Alltheentitiesoftheworld,includingourselves,areheldinplacebyour

own mental activity. Actually they are empty of inherent selfnature; they have no internal

definingessence.Whenthemindis stillthereisonlyspaceandclarity.Thisopenemptinessis

theinfinitywithinwhichallmovement,allexperience,isalwaysalreadyintegrated.

AfterwehavemadethesoundofAawejustsitinanopenway,relaxedwithwhatevercomes.If

itseemslikebusinessasusual,yourusualthoughts,justopentothem,dontcollapseintothem

andfollowthembecausethatisalreadyanactivity.Asmuchaspossible,allowwhatisarisingto

comeandgo. Thisincludesallthatarisesforoursenses,andallthoughts, sensations,feelings.

Thekeypointistoobservemovementasmovement.Ifathoughtcatchesyou,forexample,ifyou

aresuddenlyawareofthewallandyouenterintothethoughtsthatariseaboutit,theywilltake

youona littlejourneywithoutactuallygoinganywhere.Assoonasyourecognisethatthishas

happened, juststaypresentwith thatfactandsomespacewillopenup.Weenterintoworlds

createdbythejuxtapositionofthoughts,feelings,sensationsandperceptions,andeachofthese

transient,captivatingworldsisinflow.Thus,itisnotthatwearetryingtoemptythemind,astheempty mind is constantly emptying and constantly filling. Without resisting the patterning,

withouttryingtomaintainanyparticulardirection,wejustsitateaseallowingourexperienceto

behoweveritis.Letusdothisforashortperiodoftime,maybetenminutesorso.

Recognisingtheintegrationofstillnessandmovement

Inpracticinginthisway,wearenotattemptingtoshapethemindinaparticulardirection.For

example, if you do shamata or vipassana meditations, that is to say, calming the mind or

developing insight into the arising and passing of experience, there is a particular intention

whereinyouareouttotrytodosomething,tobecomemorecalmormoreclear.However,the

difficultywithintention,asIwasindicatingearlier, isthatitmeansthere isakindofformalismwhichtakesover;oneisshapingoneselftowardssomething.Thegoodideabecomesatemplate

that we then strive to align ourselves with. However, most of us live in the complexity of

unregulateddailydemands.Wearenotlivinginamonasterywhereyoucansitformanyhoursa

day ina particular ritualisedway. Wehave to bein interactionwithother people inalltheir

unpredictability.Therefore,ifweprivilegeakindofstillnesswhichisonlyachievedbyseparating

from what is going on, by renouncing the situation, we then find the world to be quite

problematic.Andofcoursemanypeoplewhogoonmeditationretreatsexperiencethat.While

theyareonretreateverythingiscalmandclearbutthentheycomebackintotheworldandthey

find themselves feeling disturbed, in fact perhaps defiled, because everything seems almost

contaminatedcomparedtothepurityofasacredspace.

However,themind itselfcannotbecontaminated. Awareness isnotpollutedbyanything that

occurs.Justaswithamirror,itisnotmadehappybyhavingsomethingbeautifulputinfrontofit

nor made sad or disturbed by having something ugly put in front of it. Whatever arises in

awarenessjustpassesthrough.Itdoesntleaveanytrace.However,whateverarisesforusasa

persondoeshaveanimpactanddoeshaveatrace.Thus,thevitalthingistoseethedifference

between your participative consciousness, that is to say, the way inwhich you process your

experience,andthebasicawarenesswhichrevealsthisexperience.Tobehumanistobehappy

andsadandsoon;itwouldbetragicnottohavethatexperience.Ifyougotoholyplaceyoucan

seeholypeoplebeingholyandwhattheyhaveisaholylife.Thatistheirchoice,onethatcarries

advantagesanddisadvantages.Butyoucanalsohaveanordinarylife;youcanwatchtelevision,

eatapizza,oryoucanrunaroundandcausemayhem.Thekeythingistoseetheactualnatureofwhatisoccurring.Ifyouaregood,ifyouarebad,whatistheactualqualityofthat?Itisactivity.


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Itis movement. Ouractivitydisplays our energy,ourmovement itdoes notdefinewhowe

really are. This is because our ground, our source, our being, our essence, is an unborn,

ungraspable openness. Our movementis important only interms of its impactonothers. It

doesntestablishanythingbeyondthemomentofitsappearance.Totrytomakethemindnot

move,wheremindisunderstoodasbeingcomposite,thesumofallthatIam,isimpossible,

ridiculous.However,a lotofmeditationtechniquesaimatthisgoal. Foralthoughthemindasawarenessisalwayscalm,themindasmanifestation,asthought,feeling,sensation,experience,is

alwaysmoving.

Movement is the quality of compassion; we go out towards the world and the world comes

towardsus.Weexperiencebothworldandselfsimultaneously. Butwhoistheexperiencerof

theflowofthatcompassion?Thisistheminditself,likethemirror.Themirrorneverchangesbut

theformationofourselvesintheworldwithothersischangingallthetime.Therefore,totryto

stop yourthoughts,to try to get themtobelike orderlysheep going one after theother is a

practicewhichrequiresahugeamountofeffortandcannotreallygoanywhere.Thisisbecauseit

canonlybemaintainedforawhileundercertainconditions,andwhentheconditionschangeit

stopshappening.Itisveryliberatingtoseethis.

Thereisaconceptinbuddhism,dependentcoorigination,whichmeans,simply,onthebasisof

this,thatarises;thiseventandthateventarealwayslinkedtogether.Selfandotherarenot

twoseparateworlds.Forexample,peopleinsultusandwefeelangryorupsetorpeopleare

sweettousandwefeelwarmandconnected;thatisjusthowitgoes.Thesearethepulsationsof

life.Itislikeapontoonbridge.Assoonasyouputyourfootononebitanotherbitmoves.Itis

constantlylikethat. Theideathatyoucouldstabiliseitwouldbe impossible;pontoonbridges

move,thatiswhattheydo.Thewholeofexistenceisaninteractivefieldnothingstandsapart

oralone.

Therefore,recognisingmovementasmovementallowsustoseethedifferencebetweenstillnessandmovement,andalsotoseethatthetwoareintegrated,thattheyareinseparable.Theyare

differentbutinseparable.Ifyoutrytogetthebitthatisstilltomove,itisnotgoingtohappen,

andifyoutrytogetthebitthatmovestobestill,itisalsonotgoingtohappen.So,beingclear

aboutthedifferencebetweenstillnessandmovementisveryimportant.

Thus,whenwesit,movementisoccurring,andthatsfine.Wedonthavetoblockit.Whatwe

starttoseeishowtherearedifferentlevelsofmovement.Forexample,athoughtarisesand

thenwehaveareactiontoit.Ifwelikethethoughtwewanttohangontoitorwefallintoitand

gointoalittlestoryforawhile.Andifwedontlikeit,orthinkthatweshouldnthaveitinour

mind,we trytopushitawayanddisidentifywithit. Thesereactionsarealsomovement. The

movementofthiseditorial,selfdefiningaspectofourexistenceisnotwrong,justperhapsalittle

unnecessary,foritisgroundedintheideathatIamtheonewhowilldeterminewhathappensto

me.Iamtheoneinchargethisfeelsnormal,asifitistrue.Yetitisjustanothermovement

withoutessenceorfixedplacetostand.Thereisnotadefinitemewhoisinchargeofmylife,a

mewhocanconstrainwhatisgoingon.Thisisevenclearerifyouhavekids,foryourlifeisnever

goingtobeyoursagain;youaregoingtogetmovedhereandthere.Toparticipateistobepartof

somethingandthatmeansnotbeinginchargeofitfromthetop,butalsonotbeingsubjugatedby

it,buttobeinit.Youareinthemorass,youaremovingwithit,aspartofit.Thatisthenatureof

movement.


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Wisdomandcompassion:anaturalaestheticofconnectivity

Torequiremovementtobestillandorderlyisakindofinsanity.Rather,wecansimplyallow

movement toariseas itdoessothatweexperienceitsephemeralbeauty.Thustheorganising

principlebecomesnotcontrolbutouraestheticappreciation.Fixedpositionsandsolidbeliefsare

a kind of anaesthetic, they put us to sleep and lull us with dreams of the egos power andknowledge. Awakening is a return to the aesthetic, to the immediacy of the senses, to the

richnessofexperience.Stayingopentowhatis,revealsanewsenseofbeauty,notasaquality

present or not in the object, but as a mode of being, the richness of engagement with the

uneditedfield. In thetraditionthis is referred toas thesambogakaya, thebody orsphereof

enjoymentofeverything.

Asourfearoftheworldlessens,weopentoamoreattunedattentiontohowotherpeopleare.

Thisattentionallowsustobemoreprecise,moreexquisite,inourrelationwithothers.Weare

thennothavingtopulltheminorpushthemawayaccordingtoourmapofhowthingsshouldbe;

weacceptthatotherpeopleareastheyareandworkwiththat.Thenthequestion,HowwillIbe

withthem?becomescreative,openingusagainandagaintoourinfinitepotential.If,however,westicktoaverynarrowrepertoireofmoves,therewillbealotofpeoplewewontwanttobe

withbecausewecannotstrutourstuffwiththem: Icantboogiebecausetheydontplaymy

tune.Thatisthegenerallimitationofbeingoveridentifiedwithwhatwetaketobethefixityof

ourpersonality.

Thetaskthenistoliveinthevibrantactualitywherewisdomandcompassionarelinkedtogether.

Inthesittingpractice,themoreweallowthewildfrontiersofourmindtoberevealed,themore

westarttoseehowreallystrangeweareandseethekindofweirdshitthatismovingaround

insideus.Whenwearenotfrightenedbythat,thatacceptanceloosensusupsowearemore

abletomakediversemovesintheworldwithotherpeople.Wethenstarttobeabletomeet

peopleastheyare,andrespondintothesituationasitis.Forexample,ifyouhangoutwithkidsyoudowhatkidsneedyoutodo.Then,ifyouspeakwithadultsoryouspeakwithelderlypeople,

yourmodeofbeingchanges.Youspeakindifferentwayswithangrypeopleandwithsadpeople.

That is to say,eachof these interactions can allowus to come forward, to manifest into the

situation with a fine tuning which is not an act of will but is just the natural aesthetic of

connectivity.Itisnotsomethingyouhavetodobutratheraneasyflowofemergencerevealed

byputtingyourselfinthewayofit.Andwedothatbyreleasingalltheintentions,plansand

opinionsthatareourhabitualsiteofoperating,andtrustthatouropenpresenceinthemoment

willbeenough.

Thus,themorerelaxedweare,themoreatease,themorefinelyattunedwebecome.Andthe

harder we try hard, the more we set agendas for ourselves, agendas that create a kind ofblinkeringorforeclosure.Thisbringsanarrownessthatagainandagaininstallsthewilltopower,

thedesiretocontrol,tohavethingsonourterms.However,themoreweseethatweareopen,

wehavelesssenseofourtermslifeisasitis.Ifyougooutandhaveapicnicwithkidsyoudo

whateveryonewantstodo.Sometimesyougetyourwayandsometimestheygettheirway;that

ishowitmoves.Itispulsationisntit?Itsnotanattemptatselfabnegation.Andpartofitisto

knowwhentohaveyourwayandwhentoletotherpeoplehavetheirway.However,thereisno

rule book that will show you how to do that, it comes through your belly, through being

connected.

Forexample,ifyouareinagroupandyouarespeaking,howdoyoufindtherhythmofknowing

whentospeak?Veryoftenifpeopleareintheirownheadstheyaresopreoccupiedwithwhat

theywant tosaythattheyinterruptotherpeopleandthengeta negativereaction. Thenthey


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mightsay,Well,whatisthepointofmetryingtotalkasyouguysdontwanttolisten! Well,

wewilllistenbutsomeoneelsewastalking. Yeah,itisalwayslikethat!!Anditisalwaysgoing

tobelikethatifwecannotfindthedoor,findthemoment.Findingthemoment,beinginthe

pulse,beingintherhythmisrevealedthroughnotdefendingourselvesagainstit.Andthereisa

basictrustinthat;thatthereisenoughtogoaround,thattherewillbetimeforeveryoneifwe

bideourtime.

Whenwelosethepulseandswirlinourselfpreoccupationthereisoftenadrivennessthatisa

kindofanxiety:Whataboutme?WillIgetwhatIneed?However,themorewerelaxandopen

weseethattheonewhoneedssomethingisatemporaryarising.Forexample,whenyouwake

upinthemorningyouneedtohaveapee.Youthenhaveapeeandyoudontneedtohaveone

againforawhile;itisjustlikethat.However,whenyouneedtohaveapeeitisagoodideato

haveapee.Thatistosay,thereisanimmediacyintheworldbutthereisnotruthinit.Itdoesnt

establishanything.Mostofwhatwedodoesntestablishanything.Ifyouhavekids,theyare

changingandgrowingandyouarechangingandgrowingandthatiswhatitis.Itgoesonfor

someyearsandthentheygoawayandthatiswhatitis.Whatwasitallabout?Itwasntabout

anything;thereisnodoggiebag,thereisnothingtotakehomeattheendoftheexperience.Allyouhavegotiswhetheryouwerethereornot,becauseifyouwerethereyougotit.Ifyouwere

therewiththemwhentheywereverysmallyouget that,andallthroughthestages,ifyouare

there,thatiswhatyougetandifyouarenotthereyoudontgetit.

Stayingwiththerawingredients

Lifeisnotatheory;itisnotconceptuallybased.Itisabouttaste,itisaboutthesenses.Sowhatis

itthenthatallowsustobemostinthatstate?Itisnotstriving,notanxiety,notpushingbut

findingourselveswhereweare,whichis alreadyin it, however it is. And the value ofeach

moment as it is, is revealed through being there in that moment, not bymaking it special.

Specialisaveryunhelpfulnotionbecausespecialisrelatedtonotspecial.Therefore,ifyoumovetowardstheworldwithacategorisation,withanorganisingprinciplewhichisattributingvalue,

whatyouwillthenbedoingislookingforthethingswhichhavethatparticularvalue.Thus,itis

aboutbeingwithwhatthingsare,beingwithhowitis,withyourbodyasitis,yourhealthasitis,

youremotionsastheyarejustbeingopentothat.

Therefore,ifyouaredepressedyoucanbedepressed.ButIdontwanttobedepressed.Well,

the factof notwanting to bedepressed doesnt stop the depression. It mightget you some

antidepressants but they probably wont shift the structure of your depression. If you are

depressedyoucanbewithit.Whatisdepression?Itissomethingwhichmovesinspaceand

time.Itisamood.Andifyoustaypresentwithityoucanexperienceitasmovement.Butifyou

try to separate from it, it becomes something that gets you. It becomes an impediment, amonkey on your back, and you feel oppressed by it. However, it is you, when you are

depressed.SothisishowIam.Whatisthis?Ifweattendsimplyandopenlytothepointof

restrictionwewill seethat theformmovesandchangeswhiletheonewhoattends, ifrelaxed,

openandfreeofpersonalbias,remainsasungraspableawareness.Thesameapplieswhenyou

are happy. To enquire what is happiness? doesntmean writing an essay about it for it is

revealedbyofferingnonidentificatoryhospitalitytoit.

Thisgoesback totheimageofthemirror, inthatthemirroris completelyopentowhateveris

there.Itisnotlimitedorbiased,itneversays, Ihavehadenoughofthis.Moreover,everything

willgobyitself.TheBuddhasbasicteachings,themostbasicandperhapsthemostprofound

teachings,areaboutimpermanence.Thatistosay,whateverisarisingisalsopassing.Whether

wethinkanexperienceisexternalorinternal,itischanging.Andbecauseeveryexperienceis


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alwayschanging,eachmomentisungraspable.Thereforegraspingnotveryuseful.Thatispretty

obvious. However, we spend so much of our lives trying to shape events as a means of

appropriation,tryingtogetwhatwewant.Ofcourseweneedtoshapethings.Ifyouaregoingto

cookapizzayouneedtoshapeit.Ifyouaregoingtobakeacakeyouneedtoshapeit.Ifyouare

goingtotalkwithkidsandhelpthemdotheirhomeworkyouhavetoshapethattime.Itisnot

shaping that iswrong in itself, for shaping is a dynamicway ofinteractingwith the fieldoneinhabits.However,ifweuseourabilitytoinfluencewhatisoccurringasamethodofgenerating

mysenseofwhoIamthenwebecomeovercontrolling.Byfocusingonourownagendaour

attitudebecomesselfreferentialandsotoomuchisatstakeineverysituation.Thisistryingto

squeezebutteroutofthecow;thecowwillgiveyoumilkthenyouhavetodosomethingwiththe

milktomakethebutter.Thatistosay,ifyouwanttoelaboratesomebigstoryforyourselfyou

can do it but the universe doesnt give you that directly. The universe gives you the raw

ingredients.

If you stay with the raw ingredients of immediate experience, infinite possibilities open up.

However,ifyouarealwaysalreadyapplyingyourownfixedrecipetowhateverfreshingredient

occurs, yourdietwill become very limitedand notmanypeople willbe ableto eatwith you.Whenweareretractandbecomerigid,disappointmentgivesusarealwhack,butwhenwerelax

intoourspaciousness,disappointmentis justatransientmomentwithnofundemental impact.

Good timescomeand go and bad timescomeand go. Happiness comesand sorrow comes.

Everypossibleeventlieswithinthecomingandgoingoftheflowofexperience.Wearenotthe

contentofourmindandyetweareinseparablefromthecontentofourmind.Thecontentofour

mindisexperience,itisnotselfdefinition,itisnotessence.Thus,ifyouhavebadtimes,these

badtimesdontdefinewhoyouare.Ifyougetabitcrazyforawhileoryoufeelcollapsedor

worthlessandlifelosesitsmeaning,ifyoucanrelaxandbepresentwithwhatshappeningitwill

passwithlessofatrace.

Therefore,itisveryimportantnottofeeltooincharge.TheworstpunishmentyoucangetinlifeistofeelthatItisalluptome.Thatisaverysadandlonelyplace.Actually,ourlifeisrevealed

throughbeingwithothers.Ourlifecomestous;itisgiventouswhenwemakethegestureof

welcomingit.Andsometimesthatishappyandsometimesitissadbutitisarevelation;itisnot

athingyoucanhangonto.Thisisreallythebasicheartofthedzogchenteachings;thatthereare

no things, there are only momentsof ungraspableexperiencearising within theopen field of

awareness. And the morewesee thatweare integratedin open spaciousness themorethe

momentsarefinejustastheyare.Thatisthebasics.

Questionsandresponses

Arethereanythoughtsorquestionsyouwouldliketoraise?

Question:Sometimestherejustseemstobeanaspectofyourselfthatisyou,likeyouweresaying

earlier.Itisveryeasytosnapbacktosomethingyouknowthatyouareverycomfortablewith.

Howdoyoudealwiththosekindofpersistent,letssay,aspectsofyourselfthatdocomeoutin

yourbehavioursometimesanditslike: Oh...itisyouagain?

James:Thatisaveryhelpfulquestionbecausetherearetwoaspectsthere:somethingisarising

andthenthereisaninvestmentinit,anidentificationwithit.Forexample,withsomethingwhich

seemsafamiliarpartofoneself:Iamjustbeingme,thereisakindofmergingintothethought

andasealingoff:ThisdefineswhoIam.Withoutstoppingbeinglikethat,justbybeingpresentwithitratherthancollapsedintoit,youstarttoexperienceitsdynamicnature.Thatistosay,the


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feeling, This isme, is both true and false. It is true in that this is how I am now in these

circumstances,butitisnottrueinthatthisitdefineswhoIreallyam.

Thus, inthesecondaspectthere isanoverinvestment,thesenseoffusion:NowIhavefound

myselforThisiswhatIamcomfortablebeing.Peopleoftensay:Oh,Iamnotcomfortable

doingthat.However,alotoflifeisnotcomfortable.Andifyoumakecomfortorhappinessthebasisofyourexistencethereisalotyouhavetogetridof.Itismorehelpfultoconsider, What

amIsittingon?Whatisthegroundorbasisofmyexistence?Ifitisathought,yousitinitfora

whilebutthenitvanishesandyouarestuckintheairlikeoneofthosecartoonswheretheguy

runsoffthetopofacliffandhislegskeeprunningtillhesuddenlyfalls.Thatistosay,whatever

wefusewithisnotgoingtolast.However,itisnotthatwecanpushexperienceawayandhave

nothingtodowithit.Nordoesitmeanwehavetobecompletelyfusedinit.Itisaboutfinding

themiddlewayofbeingpresent,relaxedandopenandworkingwithhowweareinthemoment

inthissituation.

Forexample,saythatyoufindthatsomethingiseasytodo,butthenlateritseemsmoredifficult.

Andwhenitisdifficultitisjustdifficult.Youmightwellfeelthat,Idontlikethis,Ipreferredhowmylifewasbefore. Atthatmomentyouhavegoneupinahelicopter;youareupinyour

abstract conceptualisation: Ihavegotanover-view:yesterdaywasgoodandtodayisbad.I

dontwantthis,Ineedtohavesomethingelse.Thenyoucanactivateallthemethodsyouknow

inordertochangethesituation,andthen...Ah,thisisbetter!However,whatyouhavedoneis

tosay,IamonlysafeifIamartificial.Icannotinhabitmylifeasitis;Icanonlyinhabitthe

aspectsIlike.Thatislikebeingafussykidoffivewhowillnoteattheirdinner.Parentsstruggle

indifferentwaystodealwiththatsituation,butiftheygetintosaying:OKyoucanhavefish

fingerseverydayoftheweekandforbreakfasttoo,thatmaynotbesohelpful.Forifthechild

goestosomeoneelseshousewherethehostdoesnotwanttocookfishfingers,whatisthekid

goingtodo?Itisexactlythesamestructureisntit?Therefore,itisquiteamovetoacceptand

indeedwelcomethingsthatfromourhabitualpointofview,accordingtooneaspectofourselves,wedontwanttowelcomebecausewethink:Thisisntme.Thisdoesntfit.Idontlikeit.Itis

bettertorelaxandbeflexiblebecauseouromnipotenceisnotgoingtolastverylong.

Question:Howdoesyourbodychange,howdoesitfeelfromyourexperience?

James:Thebody?

Participant:Yesasyouexperienceityourselfasyoupractice.

James:TherehasbeenamovefromasensethatmybodyissomethingthatIhave,tomybodyis

somethingthatIam,tonotreallyhavingabody;thatthebodyispartofmybeingintheworld.

SowhatIcallmybodywillbeinfluencedbyallsortsofthings.Forexample,Iamsittinginthis

particular chair which is a bit wobbly and so my back is not very supported. Therefore, I

experiencemypostureinaparticularway;somemusclesaretensinganditisnotsoeasytokeep

mychestopen.Thatiswhathappens;whereverweare,wearecomfortableoruncomfortable,

supportedornotsupported,andthatisanaspectofourbeingabodyinaworldofforms.

IfIhaveanotionofhowIwantmybodytobethenImightgetveryangryaboutthechair,feeling

thatitisattackingme.Or,Icanexperience: Thisishowmybodyisinthiskindofchair. I

wouldntnecessarilywanttositinthischairforeverbutitalsoshowsthatthechairandthebody

are in the same world and that wherever we go our body is going to be moulded by

circumstances.Forexample,whenyoumeetpeoplehere,yourbodymightrelaxandopenorit

mighttenseupifyouareabitwary.Thatkindofshiftishappeningallthetime,apulsingtoand


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frolikeseaweedinthewaves,openingandclosing.Inthisway,mybodyisnotsomethingthatI

havebutitispartofthedynamicfieldofexperiencethatisunfoldingasmyexistence.

Withinthenondualfieldofemergenceweexperiencetherhythmsofourselvesandofothers.

Sometimesourmusicisplayingandtheotherpersonisdancingtoit,andsometimestheirmusic

isplayingandwedancetothat.Italternates,flows,pulsates.Soweneedaqualityoffinessetobepresentinthemomentasweinteractorcobecomewiththeother.Ifyoudonthavetoo

muchinner lonelinessorhunger,youcanheartherhythmoftheotherandcantrustthattheir

musicisfineforawhile,andthenyourmusiccancomeforward.Thereisenoughspaceforthe

movement of leading andfollowingto occur,and this freesus from thedesperationofWhat

aboutme?

Wearejustaboutattheendofourbrieftimetogetherhere.Maybewecouldjustsitquietlyfora

little,andwecandothatonthebasisofrelaxingintothedeepoutbreath.Wedontneedto

makeanysound,andthusthisis somethingyoucandoinanysituation. Justrelaxintotheout

breathandbewithhowthingsare.

david low wild heart easy does it

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