Bullying: What Bullying: What Parents Can DoParents Can Do

Presented by Presented by

The Crime Victims’ Center The Crime Victims’ Center

of Chester County, Inc.of Chester County, Inc.

Is bullying really Is bullying really a problem?a problem?

• 160,000 kids (1 in 12) stay home each day 160,000 kids (1 in 12) stay home each day because of bullying.because of bullying.

• 60% of bullies in grades 6-9 end up with a 60% of bullies in grades 6-9 end up with a criminal record by the time they reach age 24.criminal record by the time they reach age 24.

• Nearly 50% of parents mistakenly Nearly 50% of parents mistakenly believe harassment/bullying believe harassment/bullying are are NOTNOT problems that affect problems that affect their children.their children.

Statistics compiled from www.safeyouth.org; yellodyno.org; NEA.Statistics compiled from www.safeyouth.org; yellodyno.org; NEA.

What is What is bullying?bullying?

Bullying is……Bullying is……• Repeated, aggressive Repeated, aggressive

behavior that has a negative behavior that has a negative impact on a person or impact on a person or personspersons

• Involves an imbalance Involves an imbalance of powerof power

Who is involved?Who is involved?

Bullying can be……Bullying can be……

•PhysicalPhysical

•VerbalVerbal

•VisualVisual

•SocialSocial

•CyberCyber

•Gender/Gender/SexualSexual

Relational AggressionRelational Aggression• Creates a “network of Creates a “network of

negativity” around the negativity” around the target/victimtarget/victim

• Usually girlsUsually girls• IncludesIncludes

•LiesLies •BetrayalBetrayal

•RumorsRumors •TauntsTaunts

•SecretsSecrets •HarassmentHarassment

•BullyingBullying •ExclusionExclusion

•GossipGossip •Silent TreatmentSilent Treatment

Cyber-BullyingCyber-Bullying

• Relatively newRelatively new

• Involves the use of information and Involves the use of information and communication technologies to support communication technologies to support deliberatedeliberate, , repeatedrepeated, and , and hostilehostile behavior by an behavior by an individual or group, that is intended to hurt individual or group, that is intended to hurt othersothers

• Often connected to offline, traditional bullyingOften connected to offline, traditional bullying

““Being bullied over the Internet is worse. It’s torment and hurts. They say ‘sticks and Being bullied over the Internet is worse. It’s torment and hurts. They say ‘sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.’ That quote is a lie and I stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.’ That quote is a lie and I don’t believe in it. Sticks and stones may cause nasty cuts and scars, but those cuts don’t believe in it. Sticks and stones may cause nasty cuts and scars, but those cuts

and scars will heal. Insultive words hurt and sometimes take forever to heal.”and scars will heal. Insultive words hurt and sometimes take forever to heal.”-14 years old-14 years old

• Cruel, insulting, obscene, slanderous, or Cruel, insulting, obscene, slanderous, or threatening web pagesthreatening web pages

• Harassing messages (IM, e-mail, text)Harassing messages (IM, e-mail, text)• Conspiring and excluding onlineConspiring and excluding online• Rating sitesRating sites• GossipGossip• StalkingStalking• Damaging pictures Damaging pictures

from camera phonesfrom camera phones

Cyber-BullyingCyber-Bullying

Are kids really Are kids really affected by affected by

bullies?bullies?

Effects can be:Effects can be:

PHYSICAL

EMOTIONAL

SOCIAL

ACADEMIC FUTURE

How can I tell if a child is How can I tell if a child is being bullied?being bullied?

• WithdrawalWithdrawal• A loss of friendsA loss of friends• A drop in grades/inability to concentrate in schoolA drop in grades/inability to concentrate in school• A loss of interest in activities he/she previously enjoyedA loss of interest in activities he/she previously enjoyed• Torn clothingTorn clothing• Become aggressive or moodyBecome aggressive or moody• BruisesBruises• A need for extra money or A need for extra money or

suppliessupplies• InsomniaInsomnia• AnxietyAnxiety

Why are some Why are some kids always kids always the target?the target?

Kids who are often Kids who are often targeted by bullies are:targeted by bullies are:

• Anxious, insecureAnxious, insecure• Suffer from low self-esteemSuffer from low self-esteem• Non-confrontationalNon-confrontational• Different from their peersDifferent from their peers

Bullies pick on kids they know they can hurt- it Bullies pick on kids they know they can hurt- it gives themgives them POWERPOWER!

However, NO ONE EVER DESERVES TO However, NO ONE EVER DESERVES TO BE BULLIED!BE BULLIED!

What can What can we do?we do?

Parents and Parents and teachers can help!teachers can help!

• Talk to your child’s teacher instead of the bully’s Talk to your child’s teacher instead of the bully’s parents. Be persistent about dealing with the parents. Be persistent about dealing with the problem.problem.

• Find out about anti-bullying policies and Find out about anti-bullying policies and programs at your child’s school.programs at your child’s school.

• Explore non-violent conflict resolution strategies Explore non-violent conflict resolution strategies with your child.with your child.

• Help your child build their self-confidence.Help your child build their self-confidence.• Encourage students to be good bystanders.Encourage students to be good bystanders.

Parents and Parents and teachers can help!teachers can help!

• With your child, develop of list of people they With your child, develop of list of people they can ask for help.can ask for help.

• Don’t minimize the pain your child is Don’t minimize the pain your child is experiencing. Empathize and keep the experiencing. Empathize and keep the conversation open.conversation open.

• Get kids involved in activities Get kids involved in activities outside of school to meet outside of school to meet new friends. new friends.

• Be a good example- don’t bully Be a good example- don’t bully others or encourage bullying others or encourage bullying behaviors.behaviors.

The Crime Victims’ Center The Crime Victims’ Center of Chester County, Inc.of Chester County, Inc.

Free programs to grades Pre-K to 12th Free programs to grades Pre-K to 12th BullyingBullying Good Touch/Bad TouchGood Touch/Bad TouchStranger Safety Stranger Safety Internet Safety Internet Safety Sexual HarassmentSexual Harassment Acquaintance RapeAcquaintance RapeCyber-BullyingCyber-Bullying

24-hour Hotlines: 24-hour Hotlines: 610-692-7420610-692-7420 610-692-7273610-692-7273

Business Line: Business Line: 610-692-1926610-692-1926

www.cvcofcc.orgwww.cvcofcc.org