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BACHELOR GIRL CHATSTANDING A MAN IN THE CORNER

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BjrllELEX ROVJNDMercy exclaimed the Mere Man as

th Bachelor Girl smiled vaguely andjust moved tho tip of her at a pass-

ing youth What a crushing bow Whathaa he done to you

The Bachelor Girl glanced backward atthe flushed and uncomfortablelookingyouth with a malicious gurgle

It Isnt what hes done to me Mr Por-ter she replied with a soft ripple ot

laughter Its what Im doingto him standing him in thecorner

WhatOh punishing him for being naughty

explained the Bachelor Girl being verysweet and polite you know and not athome whenhe calls and giving him noth-ing but extra dances and casual glancosand a chance word in the conversationand a nod of the head when I meet himand a sweet ambiguous answer when hetries to quarrel with me Its the onlyway and she sighed softly

The only way to what Inquired theMere Man with characteristic masculinereadiness to defend his sex To put aman through the third degree or to makehim hate you or

To do what you want himto do returned the Bachelor Girl quiteunperturbed as she lifted her skirts daintily over a puddle Theres no use arguing with a man nor explaining to himnor bullying him nor coaxing himWrangling is as foolish Marchand she grasped her fur toque with bothhands as the wind swept down the ave-nue in a biting guest

Whats the matter with March protested the Mere Man trying to hold hishat and his cane and his balance and theBachelor Girl all at the same time Itsa pretty good month

Like some pretty good wives rejoined the Bachelor Girl mockingly Itjust blusters und blows and makes amuss and a fuss and never accomplishesanything except to make itself disliked

But you cant stand a husband in thecorner retorted the Mere Man Youcant treat the man who Is paying thegas bill and the rent as if he were justthe paper on the wall or an extra chairaround the house or

Oh yes you can broke In the Bach-elor Girl lotting go her hat as the windsubsided And if you dont hell treatyou that way Just look at the wiveswho are stood In the corner go much ofthe time that they get an habitual apolo-getic look on their faces as If they werebegging your pardon for living Thoseare the March wives who wrangle andnever get their way and the April wiveswho weep and never get what they cryfor not the May wives who

Who smile and smile and continue tobe villains interposed the Mere Mansarcastically

Exactly agreed the Bachelor GirlHow well you fill out my arguments

Mr PorterThe Mere Man grunted and subsidedHavent you ever noticed continued

the Bachelor Girl placidly that its theperson who says least In this world whoaccomplishes most and that Its the person who says least in a quarrel who doesas he pleases afterward Argument is alittle trick invented by His Majesty Satanfor putting the right person in thewrong

But a woman must always have herBay declared the Mere Man maliciously

And thats why a man always has hisway rejoined the Bachelor Girl WhileBho Is thinking of stinging remarks to

and different ways to express herand to present her side of the

question and to strengthen her argumentund wasting all her energy in windstormsand all her reserve force in recrimina-tions he is merely thinking of how he is

to get out and do what she is for-bidding him to o

And of what a good excuse her harangus Is giving him for doing It addedthe Mere Man wryly

And of how he will punish her If hisconscience hurts him after he has done1 finished the Bachelor Girl ifshe would just stand him in the cornerIf she would just hUe her tongue andclinch her fingers and let him fire the

gun or the first remark and thenlead him on and make him do all

the talking and the firing hed find him-self getting madder and madder andwinding himself all up In his own

gradually backing Into the corthe Bachelor Girl laughed mer-

rily at theAnd the Mere Man

bitterly I suppose It would be her cue tosmile triumphantly and go off and leavehim there

Yes gurgled the Bachelor Girl andin half an hour hed bo only too glad tocrawl out and to come over and sit at her

and say his little Now I lay meyou to walk over me

I know how It feels sighed the MereMan thoughtfully Just like It did whenI was a small boy and the governor sentme upstairs to stand in a corner until hehad finished his cigar and his morningpaper before spanking mo The hour Ispent in that corner was ten times morepunishment than the whipping Itself andby the time the Old Man got to me I wasready to yell Oh spank spank andhave it done and over with

Exactly agreed the Bachelor Girl delightedly And thats Just the way aman feels when he knows he deserves hiswifes scolding sue wont give It tohim hut just goes on Ignoring him andkeeping him guessing what It will be likewhen it does

Ugh the shuddered Whydont you write a book on It The Re-finement of Torture for Husbands

to Drive it Man to DrBut It doesnt drive him that way

protested the Bachelor Girl It driveshim just the way you want him to go ItIsnt asking a man where he has beenwhen he stays out late nights that makeshim tell you the truth Its not askinghim that gets him io nervous and anx-ious that he will toll you almost anythingJust to get on good terms with you againIt Isnt sitting up for him with a pokerthat makes him sorry its going outyourself or going to sleep thathis curiosity or makes himhimself It Isnt forbidding him to smokein the parlor that keeps him out of Itbut making the parlor so cold and stiffthat he cant pass the door without ashudder It Isnt what you say but whatyou dont say that falls on his consciencewith a dull sickening thud Its shuttingthe door on him theoretically just asyou would on tho cat or a stray dog thatmakes him want to come inside andwarm his fingers at a casual smile ora kind word from you rho wife whodoca as she pleases und makes her husband do likewise Is the one who never

back when he begins to stormslips quietly over to the piano

and begins to play Chopin very softlyor to read the Itubaiyat or to hum the

Merry Widow waltz the Rind whowhen she takes a husband takes himfor granted the placid kind thatfor nothing but merely expectswants and gets It

And treats a man rejoined the MereMan bitterly as If he were a pet animal

a babythats what you are mostly in-

terrupted the Bachelor Girl nonchalantlyor course she added grudginglythere arc a few who are different who

dont have to be stood in the corner Ifyou begin by managing them properly

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By tying thelm to the bedpost I sup-pose sneered the Mere Man or lockingthem up in the closet or taking awaytheir toys and awakening their childishInterest In simple and

And making them think you thinkthey think they want to do what youwant them to do finished the BachelorGirl decisively

Nonsense retorted the Mere ManNo woman can make a man think he

want to do what he doesnt want to do-A man knows what he wants nowadays

Yes agreed the Bachelor Girl butif he doesnt know you know it hell beshamed to acknowledge it ft mandoesnt care half so much whether or nothe has his way as he whether ornot other people think iris wayHe is not half so jealous of lila rights nshe Is of his dignity and its his dignitythat the wife who hurls questions andcommands and Invectives at him hitsBut the one who takes for granted thather husband is the soul of honor andwouldnt gamble nor drink nor deceiveher and is dying to spend his moneyand his time on her will find him tryingto live up to her opinion of him before

And the woman who takes foxgranted that every man she meets Isgoing to fall in love with her Is prettyapt to have them all doing it Haventyou ever seen a snip of a girl with doughcolored hair and freckles and a silly nosewho had more flowers and attentionsand sweethearts than any other girl inher set And havent you ever seen awife without a redeeming feature or anoriginal thought whose husband believedher a Venus and a Minerva combinedjust because she expected him to

Its Christian Science murmured theMere Man In an awestruck tone

Its the science of managing a manretorted the Bachelor Girl The wifewho Is always wondering whether she Issetting all the devotion that is due herand doubting whether her husband Istelling her the truth or not is very sureto find those doubts growing Into strongblack realities nnd then and then itstime to put him In the corner

But just think of the shock to thehusband pleaded the More Man flickinghis cane resentfully

WhatOf how he feels when a nagging wife

suddenly stops nagging and of the coldshivers It gives him when he dodges aflying remark or a whizzing plate to putup his hand and find theres nothingthere Its eerie

Yes said the Bachelor Girl Itsso disappointing to his vanity to see thatshe doesnt care enough about him anylonger to question him or wrangle withhim or to bother about whore ho goes orwhat he or how long he stays awnyor what his opinion on anything happensto be But and she waved muffexpressively when a man fights forplenty of rope a wise woman will givehim so much rope that hell get nil tangled up In ft and cone around pleadingfor her to cut the knots and put him ona fourfoot leash so that he cant getinto any more trouble

Perhaps sighed the Mere Man butIt must be an awl strain

On the rope or the manOn the woman corrected the More

Man to keep from saying all thosepleasant little that burn yourtongues if you them and ouroars If you do

It Is sighed the Bachelor Girl withher cheek ou her muff but Its worthIt and It makes her feel so afterwardTo see her husband standing in thecorner

nnd to remember all the thingsshe might have said and didnt Dontwe always feel better over the meanthings we retrain from saying In a quar-rel than we do over the ones we blurtedoutI dont know replied the Mere Manwith dignity I never quarrel

Wha The Bachelor Girl stoppedshort and shut her lips tightly

You know I dont declared the MereMan with his head in the air

The Bachelor Girl looked thoughtfullyout over the line of passing carriages andsmiled

If you are thinking bogart the MereMan at her expression of thatlast that last time yqu bogan-it

The Bachelor Girl turned and regardedhim enigmatically through her lashes

And you said all the spiteful and unkind things and gave me the nastiest

and why you actually ownedat fault and begged my pardon

afterwardThe Bachelor Girl dropped her eyes and

smoother her muff gentlyStop it cried the Mere ManStop what Mr Porter Inquired the

Bachelor Girl sweetlySmoothing your mutt and patting me

on the back and getting me all tangledup in my argument and looking at me asif you wished you could give me a spoorful of soothing syrup and taking awaymy toys and my selfrespect Why dontyou say something

Isnt windy T remarked the Bachelor accommodatingly

Oh hang exclaimed the Mere Manlaughing in spite of himself Ill give InIt was all my fault and Im a brute andyoure the cleverest sweetest

What are you trying to say Mr Porter broke In the Bachelor Girl coldlyNow I lay me down for you to walkover replied the Mere Man with asheepish grin Xow an I come out ofmy

Bachelor Girl only leaned overand patted his arm gentlyYou silly old goose she said softly

ANTIQUES

We need not travel for themNo they are brought to our very doorsA department store has a big collectionTheres a silver watch made over a cen

tury agoA fascinating filigree bracelet suggests

delightful FlorenceAJlussiau tear vase is suggestive of aquaint custom But one would certainly

need two unless onea eyes were so ac-commodating as to weep one at a time

Handcuffs from ancient Peru are another interesting item It Is lovely to t eable to try them on though one Isfoxy enough to only go one wrist in theoperation lest the lock should refuse towork

JapaneseProbably the best flavored radish in

the world is the Japanese variety Sakurajima which Is said to attain the asstonishing weight of twenty orpounds while still retaining its delicious

This radish Is perfectly easy toin and seeds of it have

been least two New Yorkseedsmen for many years Twelvepoundspecimens have been raised on LongIsland by Mr H B Fullerton but halfpounders are large enough for the

American This radish grows best Inthe summer and may bo kept until latefall If burled In sand In a cool cellar

Sleeve TfeTvneA mere frill or cape arrangement of

lace or transparent stuff often serves forsleeves and the wing or angel sleeveswhich have been making their appearanceeven In certain artistic Parisian eveninggowns arc especially effective In connection with the tea gown as are loosedraped sleeves of any graceful tanaway to show the outside arm

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IOTCH A LA CABtfOP

Charming Bully Trent for Horde of

The whistles were just beginning toblow for noon when three little sparrows swerved down from the rail ofWalnut street bridge and took up theirstation on the roof of an empty freightcar The car stood on a siding at Thirtyfirst street opposite the long low ware-house sheds

Whistle after whjstle took up the cryof the noontide and the three little spar-rows were joined by three more then bya dozen then a score and so on untilfully 500 chattering chirping birds wereranged along the car roofs

AB the last chime of the citystriking a hand

appeared In the doorway of one of thewarehouses sweeping out the nndloose grain generously addingor more of good seed

Then such a whirring and chirpingfighting too for sparrows arc the most

ofThe man with stood looking

benignly down upon his pensionersnow and then throwing extra grainto them

What do you think of jny broad lineehj he asked It started one snowyday when I threw some grain to twohungry little chaps at noon ateIt nnd went away and toldNext day they were back with somemore and now look at em

He drew back Into the doorway ns If to-go away and instantly like hungrychicks they pursued him Into the verywarehouse Itself chatteringand excitedly fluttering abouthalf timid

For fully an hour they hung aboutsearching for and gobbling up every miteof grain In Then in twos andthrees they

Theyll be back tomorrow said theman cheerfully and sure enough theywere and are every day From the bridgethey look like a swarm of particularly tntlittle ants hustling eager and hap-py In either rain or sunshinethey know they are sure of that luncheonand on hand noon every sparrowwith a guest or two to attend the lan

HOW WOMEN DRESS

A Table Showing tile Expense of theAverage Fair One

The average woman living in a variableclimate will find it necessary to hove Inher wardrobe the following garments

FOtt WINTER WEAttOne piir of high r 30Ono pair of rubbers SO

Three pairs of woolen LWTwo woolen anion tOOTwo flannel UBdecklrM usBlack sateen undenSdrt n l x

Two pair of stores 169Two flannelette nlghtscnnif LSWinter coat XMWinter mica ifcOTMillinery 50Umbrella L

FOR SUMMER WEiltOne pair of totr sheej y M-V jp ji r of itockins 148loon pairs ot celtan drawers LWTwo cotton nlrttcowM JJOGauze underrate ijftjThree corset carer ft

corset LftTwo wbito underskirts 169

csttosi gotras iWskirt iaj

Shirt waists iSJ-rarassl CJMillinery SMGloves 00

Total far the year 00

While it Is necessary that a womanswardrobe contain all of things onecan see at a glance gnrmontneed not be bought new every year

ENTER THE PIXAFORE STYLE

The woman with a passion for renova-tion will find much comfort in U o fact

some of the newestthe pinafore

For by removing the sleevesyears gown cutting away the

bodice both back and front and edgincwit hsllk passementerie presto there isconjured forth a little garment ready

drawn over the dainty dmanded by the pinafore style

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JEALOUSY IS

French Scientists Explain-How Death May Result

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Jilted by Sweetheart YonHgTries to Be Phll0aopkicaIGroTraWorHe Trlei CliRHKe of Scene IsSot Benefited End Finally Comeswith Body an Helmut RK Ever

Tlie faculty of the Institute of Scienceat Limoges France has recently decidedth i man and presumably wcman Isliable to die of an acute attack of Jeal-ously just as It is now by medlcal experts that a may diebf a broken heart in the physical senseof the word

Investigators in the laboratory of theLimoges Institute declare that the passionof jealousy Is psychophysical that isthat It first arises In the brain and istransmitted to the cardiac region whenceother parts of the system ate affected

to create a specific area of diseaseThis disease as will be shown presentlycan be traced from the brain down thespinal column to the parts of the bodywhich are affected and Its presence canbe uly attested from the tact that thetissue in the line of the maladys oper-ations shows distinct signs of attrition orwearing away

Such evidence would find its corrobatlonin the experience of who have everand what human has not suffered fromthe feeling of jealously The sufferer ispainfully conscious of a gnawing or con-suming sensation within him In certainareas the sensorial center particularly-the brain sums to burn the exact sensation being not unlike that of expansionarising from heat which is about fo forcean explosion So it is that the lover inhis jealous fit talks of his heart burst-Ing with Jealousy

I Explained PhysicallyAn explanation afforded of this psycho-

physical phenomenon is the following Inof lovo it is well known that the

and understanding are obscuredFor this there Is a physical and a medi-cally explained cause which does awaywholly with the romantic aspect of thelovers muchsung malady Memory andthe senses play an Important part in jealously as we all know It ia shown thatan excess of blood is drawn to mem-ory and seasonal areas with the resultthat tho other parts of the brain arebadly supplied owing to the unusual activity if the two in question Any attemptto exert the faculties of judgment amiunderstanding must consequently bebreed effort causing all that loss of tis-

sue which is invariably associated withthe exertion of force that is not sponta-neous or supported by goodwilL Povertyof blood In the sufferer renders the con-dition of the jealous one all the morepainful and acute since the other faculties of the brain are deprived of properbloodnutrition and oxygonatlon Conse-quently in cases of extreme pain or suf-fering arising from jealousy the patientsnormal faculties are so dead and thememory of past enjoyments with the ob-ject of his love so disponlonatdly activethat the mental balance Is entirUy upset-a condition which soon reacts upon thebody producing Irresponsibility for onesacts ae well AS that peculiar kind ofstupor of halfdrunkenness frequentlyevident in the motions or the speech sofamiliar to those who affected

Healthy Man aThe French institute dealt recently

with the case of a from Jealousythe victim being a In a businesshouse Martin by Ago twentyeight Martin was been physi-cally a perfect type of manhood For twoyears he had paid his addresses to ayoung woman who appeared to reciprocatehis affections Some months before theirintended marriage the woman provedfalse and deserted her lover for Mother

A normally constituted and inhealth Martin allow

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ONE OF THE NEWEST OVERBLOUSE EFFECTS

2799

The overblouse Idea so well portrayedIn the dress shown Is still acknowledgedto be the prettlst thing in for theyoung girl Here the of asulmpe or lining of a material differentfrom that of the dress and an overblouse which has wide arm holes and aprettily rounded neck outlined a trim-ming band of most becoming shapingThe sleeves may be made in full or elbowlength The style Is unusually gracefulfor a young girls wear and Is equallysuitable for development In a silken orwcolen fabric The skirt Is a eeveasored

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one with a plait at eachseam This Insures a smooth fit overthe hips and a stylish flare at the hemIf preferred the gulmpe and dress may bemade up separately so that a differentunderblouse may be worn when desiredFor the 14year size the pattern

9 of 241nch materialThree 14 and 16 yearsThis pattern may be obtained by In-

closing 10 cents in stamps and addressingPattern Department The WashingtonHerald 734 Fifteenth street northwestgiving the number 2799 and size wanted

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his grief to prevent him continuing hIsprofessional work He endeavored withall his will to live down his unhappinessavoiding nIl excesses abstaining totallyfrom alcohol anti keeping tho brain socool that it was though he would soonrecover from his Illstarted heartDespite exercise of Iris will

who was a sensitive soul couldThe memory of his lost girl

was always with him and soon owing toloss of interest In his work he was forced-to leave his employment The old remedyof change of scene c was recom-mended to him but without avail Mar-tin could not forget

Neither did he pine for he retained his usual to the end buthe died No known to medicalscience could S3 the cause of hisdecay and It was thereiore resolved tohole a postmortem

Heart IB HealthyJt was found that the far from

showing sings of being conditionwhich we call broken was healthy allbut ca e of certain ventricularmuscles which lay directly in the planeof communication with the sensory nervesThe ventricles showed an abnormal dlsttrition which could be traced likewise inthe nerve lines of the vertebral columnor Alonjj this cobJnm a distinctline subInflammatory nervetissuecould be traced right Into the sensoryparts of his brain which were shown tohave suffered from acute Inflammation Acorresponding contraction of other partsOf the brain was noted and of such kindas to produce between the diseased areaand the unaffected portions a positive lineof demarcation denoted by tissue whichJmd the appearance of being in process ofdecomposition

Anatomical science has as yet providedno definite data to correspond with thepsychological pymptomp of Jealousy Yetthis case of the French Institute wouldappear to be worthy of consideration asa test the value of which must be substantiated by the research of other laboratones

FROM WOMANSPOINT OF VIEW

At R fashionable tee room the otherday very much crowded of late by raeson of lie excellence in every

a matron with twoa son and daughter was among

the crowd waiting for seats Presumablythe trio belonged to the better clasrthoir patronage of such a place wouldprove that even If their clothing had notproclaimed money In abundance yet theywere to a degree Theypushed and jostled the patient standees

hotter manners and actually snatchbefore those who had occupied

them had fairly given up possession Atthat the family was youthtaking a seat across the aisle

The atmosphere of that ton room andother I ever saw ip refined to a

and serenity marks the appearf both patrons and employes It-

ic not a quick lunch place but one wherewomen can oat as they do at withall the refinements and with con-versation so the conduct of the mannerlass family was conspicuous They frettedat the slow service and Ue their asif eating was an unpleasantput out of the way as soon as possibleThe feminine members of the party finish-ed first and the girl stepped across to thetable her brother was seated andmade a tar his check

A full glass of water stood near it andwas overturned to the discomfort or twowomen woo were noietly eating at thetable The water spread to theirand on to theirthat of fourteen or so did notoffer one word of apology or regret Shewas not even embarrassed and onlookerswere forced to conclusion thatdants by carelessness were

life to be noticed Therewas some confusion while the femininemanager of the place and the girls who

charge of that and neighboringcleared away the results of the

carelessness and during it a remarkablething happened A party of four withhealthy appetites and a taste for expen-sive dishes dropped their checks underthe table at which they ate and left theroom a few dollars in debt to the man-agement

I remember the party very wellalt four wera beautifully attired

down to the smallest detail anti theirorder elaborate than is usuallygiven in midday They had the earmarksof good breeding and large Incomes yetthey were nothing bettor than a band ofthieves and while they will probablynever dare to go there again they willfind plenty of other they may beable to cheat of a A

wife told him of the incident saidproprietor of a chain of high

hotels told him that this kind ofcrookedness wits not uncommon amongwomen and that it was so rare amongmen they did not take trouble to

as they do the other sex

a hotel largely patronised by womenthe attendant at the dressing rooms al-

ways open to the public answered thecomplaint of a woman against the towelssupplied by tho management in this fash-Ion The loss by theft was such an important item of expense that the tinysquares hardly large enough tQ do serv-ice once were substituted for decentsized

with satisfactory results Theyworth stealing and the trouble

of hiding In the clothing with the risk ofdetection Stationery Is stolen by thewholesale and table cutlery disap-pears despite the vigilance ofWhp charge It in the bill when It is de-tected This is scarcely an enviable reputatlon for us to acquire is it

BErm BRADEEX

SILVER CIEA2VS IT

Silver polishing day comes no more inthe scientific household for now it IsslIver boiling Instead Some bright

woman has discovered that the very bestway to make your silver look like isto put the various articles In a tinwash after a thorough polish witheither and whiting or siliconand to cotfer them with water into whicha handful of washing soda has beenthrown and allow the water to boll fortwo or three hours

On removal a good rubbing with asoft chamois makes a tine polish Inthe case of pieces with embossed de-signs this Is actually the only way ofgetting the deposits of cleaning powdersout of the crevices and for severalrubbing Is all that Is necessary to bringthem bright

A Novel AVcdilinfr GiftAt a recent Washington wedding a

bright new cork was displayed amongthe presents shown at the home ofbride Inquiry revealed the fact that thishumble bottle stopper was a gift fromthe brides father who declared that hedid not mean to be outdone by the rela-tives and friends Opinions differed asto the importance and value of his giftbut all admitted that it was a corker

Linen SaltsWhite IsBut It Is relieved-A touch of color is usualAfter white come blue shadesMordore brown Is to be modishSoutacheliko stitchery Is in evidenceEmbroider will figure on fine modejsFor wear strictly tailors

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WOMAN ABOUT TOWN

FRAILTIES AND FOIBLES OF HER SEX

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When I vai rofiox I used to hearFrom army ciders Up

This ears adrice Hans on wy childjwrer lose Joe grip

They brand me by a promise isdI said I nerer weald

But now Id gladly lose it ifI jest knew how I eeuld

Sty head aches till it feels as ifIts seams must tit soon rip

My tones nd right veil I knowI hafent lOSt toy

Selflthlr TcnderfccttrtedWhen a certain Mr Dash died two

years ago his large circle of friends hadbut one thing to say What would hisfamily do without him A great manyquite happily married women wIth reallyestimable husbands had all along feltthat Mrs Dash dear soul as She wasdidnt quite appreciate Mr Dah andyou know what a man has to be beforewomen feel that way about him Hewas devotion Itself the gentlest tenderest hearted man on earth and recentlyMrs Dash has bought a new house andgone Into colors I met her the otherday coming out of a physicians officeand I said to the physician Is chari-table you know according not to oneslights but to ones liver She managesto bear up In spite of her loss doesntshe It was an oft day with the manof medicine too for he spoke his mindfreely

Dashs death was the best thing thathappened to his family he said

Tender hearted Why his tendernessof heart was nothing under Heaven butoldplated selfishness He bought hiswife flowers every day of Uw ten yearsshe was an Invalid but his gender hearwouldnt aI16w her to undergo an opera-tion to make her welL He said hecouldnt bear to think of her sufferingHe Jet her live in a damp and dingyhouse because It was the dear home ofhis boyhood and had sacred associationsHe let his oldest daughter marry ras-cal because he was too tender hearted tobreak her heart by ordering the fellowoff the place The second daughter isnearly blind because he couldnt bear tosubject her to the humiliation of wearingglasses when she was a little girl Hewas a happy highminded man with aclear conscience and he was a calamity-to his entire family

But his family adored him I ven-tured to remark

The physician grinnedDidnt you notice a pink rose on Mrs

Dashs hat he asked She speaks ofhim as my poor dear husband but shetold me today she didnt believe any-body who was really well could be veryunhappy Shes well and hes dead

But then we all felt that she neverdid appreciate Mr Dash

JVot EntertainingI was waiting for Matilda in the parlor

of her one afternoon last week and-I help overhearing the conversa-tion of a young woman and a young manwho sat by the window There was aconquering air about him and the high-lights on his patent leather shoes smirkedwith complacency

And what are you going to give upduring Lent he asked thrusting anamethyst ouffbutton into the foreground

Im going to give up all entertain-ments she replied

He beamed upon her coylyDont say that he pleaded That

will mean I cant come to see you forforty days

She smiled sublty I dont know exactlywhat a subite smile is but I feel sure anexpert would have classified hers In thatway

Oh no it wont she saidThe shot dented the plaster back Mm

but ho wasnt even aware that anythinghad been fired

Adapted to Their Orrri UseIve long been Impressed by the faot

that no 3jporlenc Is unique saysthe woman who writes If a thing hap-pens to one person you may be sure Itwill happen OP has happened to

else week I raad of a North-ern woman who went to New Orleansand a negro got up and gave her Ills seatin a street car funny thing too for InNew Orleans a part of evary street carIs set aside for negroes and white peoplearent allowed in those seats at alLAnyway the Northern woman saidhate to deprive you of your seat andthe negro answered with a bow Nodepravity at all Fully three years agoa retired army chaplain told me thatvery same story bow and all and saidit was a personal experience of his here-in Washington Henry Clay Barnabeeuses it in his published reminiscences-and says it happened In Boston Maybeit happened in every town on earth AllI know Is it never happened to me ImJust the person who wrote the storyten years ago and not knowing it hadover really happened I made It upmade the negro bow and lies bowedever since

Tln Better Not to JokeI hope I can take a Joke says a girt

I know I know I can do It as well asmost people anyway put I do thinkare some things people oughtnt to Jokeabout I was visiting down In NorthCarolina a little while ago and n anold burying ground on plantation Icame across a tombstone that had such-a funny Inscription on Jt It was to thememory of William Calhoun James SomethlngorOther and It gave his age asfive days and eighteen hours The nightafter I saw It I was at a dinner partyand I chortled over that Inscriptionand remarked that while they were aboutIt they might as well have used a stop-watch pn William Calhoun Jamesin the minutes and seconds I was feelingfrolicsome you understand and that wasmy Idea of wit Tho host didnt laughand I asked him If he didnt think It waaa funny tombstone He looked at mesolemnly and said

No you see It Is the tombstone ofmy mothers fatherAnd that man had me apologizing and

humbling myself and trying to squeezemyself through a knothole In the floorand praying for an earthquake for nearlyten minutes I saw that he waslying Then everybody laughed Thatwas their idea of a Joke Just as if a re-mark like that wouldnt make anybodyforget William Calhoun James age

tTells on Josephine

My friend Josephine has been urgingme for a long time to write letters tothe newspapers condemning

more opposed to It even than MrsFIske and In Mrs Fiskes eyes boiling inoil Is entirely too easy a death for anyscientist who experiments on a livinganimal Personally Ive never felt a callto Interfere When any child Im

in has diphtheria I dont care howmany animals were slaughtered to procure ntltoxin my Ideas are vague onthe I feet sure experimentson animals gave us antitoxin And I canstand It to have few million rabbits

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chopped up in the honest hope of riddingthe world of cancer However Josephinehas had me so worked up lately that Ivebeen uneasy about my caUousneus Sheread me a hideous account of vivisectionit sounded like a description of an opera-tion for mastoldltls on i human beingbut when I out the subject was adog of course that made it seem a thou

times worse Josephine had mestteed almost to the letterwriting pointwlrfen she invited me to luncheon Joseph-ine gave me pate do Inc gras to eat andsaid she simply adored it Josephineshowed me her new baby lamb coat andcalled it a dream And Id been ashamedto let her Know I like broiled lobsterJpsephlne can do her condemning ofvivisection She ban a mind too big t btroubled by the bugbear of consistency

How About BnrKlnraTheres a young matron out at Chevy

Cha who bas devised a scheme whichcomforts her greatly AU her ute shesben afraid her house J Ill burn

an hereditary tear I think for hermother smelled smoke in the middleof the night right along for years andyears The young matron showed me overher house not long In the kitchennear the door Is a goodsized trunk Inthe hall near the front door Is an orna-mentally carved chest

Ever since my aunts house burnedthe young matron explained rye beendreadfully worried UH I thought up thisI keep all my Jewelry and silver and mybest clothes in the chest and the trunkSometimes its a little JnconvQi tont get-ting at the things when Im in a hurrybut you cant think how safe I feel In-case of fire one of these boxes is sure19 be saved If the fires in the back ofthe house Ill be certain of sexing thethings in the chest If the lires in thefront of the house theyll b sure togot trunk out Its a comfort ofhaving the arrangement but sometimesI worry a good deal at night wonderingwhether Id better put my Jewelry in thetrunk or in the chest If I coexist only besure which nd of the houfee will catchfire flrst Id teal perfectly safe but notknowing I cant help worrying gooddeal no matter where I put my chieftreasures

ROLE OF SCARFS

The new Oriental scarfs of silk chiffonoften term the only trfmmiag on some ofthe uptodate evening gewits with plcturesquo results jcarfs are usedfor this trimming a d they are placedover each shoulder veiling the upper partof the arm The ends pointed andusually weighted with tassels dull goldor silver hang down at the back and atthe front sometimes quite to the hem ofthe skirt sometimes only to the waistThe chiffen Is often embroidered and itis not necessarily of the saMe color asthe rest of the gown

These scarfs are printed In Oriental designs very closely w vea and yet dia-phanous each design bete from five tosix yards long and two yards Thecolors are in the soft shades of therainbow vWet blue blush roee pinkand pale yellow graduating into a deepSame shade Some of the chiffon scarfsare delicately painted In Grecian designsThese paintings and embroideries arescattered through the body 91 the scarfsand the antique Grecian borders make anartistic finish

On a simple semiempire gown of whitemousseline de sole recently worn therewas a great scarf of tune thickly sprin-kled with geld paillettes bordered by asalon embroidered in raised gold rosesand finished with a deep geld fringe Theends of the scarf were embroidered ingold rose design and the skirt was decorated with deep flotwce with inser-tions of lace

Many of the soft silk scarfs are quiteplain finished with plain hem-stitched borders One design to

with a pink evening frock waslong wide and perfectly plain made ofpastel rose silk mousseline darker thanthe pink of the frock but harmonizingperfectly with It The only other decora-tion was a fold of pink t He to soften theline of the corsage

A novelty for the coming season isshown In the filetlace shoulder scarfembroidered very prettily with the newbrightcolored vegetable silk oa a paleold lacecolored ground An interestingnew manner of wearing the scarf is toAttach it to the top of the waistbelt atthe back whether high or low Thisprevents it slipping and allows it to behandled with grace

THE HATPIN AS A WEAPOJT

Train the St Louis GkbtDraeoatThere has been a steady development of

the hatpin as a weapon of defense forseveral years and it is earning more andmore Into use The successful efforts

Louis school teacher to repelby the of hatpins finally driving

the robber away bearing a portion of onein his face once again proves that thehatpin must supersede all other means offeminine selfprotection Pistols in thehands of women have always been

and unreliable Fewmen for that mattercan al with ac-

curacy and without confusion Woman-Is at her best in handtoJ and conflictand the weapons with which she is armedmust be those peculiarly suited to hermode of eombat She has for many gen-

erations been an acknowledged adept withthe broomstick and the rolling pin haswon unnumbered victories for her hutthere is a delicacy a readiness and adeftness about the hatpin that adapt itto the feminine hand more perfectly thanthose rougher an4 not so ready Instru-ments The hatpin can be reached witha facility almost iightnlnglik and by amotion unusually unexpected and decep-tive to a highwayman or other mtjefactor is no searching about inthe baffling folds of womans raiment forIt which involve a fatal delay It is rightat hand on the instant and Is Inflictingits painful and nimble Jabs with a

that Is impossible to follow with theeye To make It a perfect itneeds a few changes We look for theNew and Imported Colts Hatpin or theSmith Wesson Quickaction Pin Thechief defect In the hatpin Isits handle Hatpins should be made withthe ornamental head of such size andshape that It can be more firmly graspedThe present style of very large knobs onthe end some of them fully as great Indiameter as an unhulled walnut is an

4n the right direction If the headof these recent hatpins were loaded withlead they might me useful in felling anassailant to the earth as with a slungshot The hatpin properly developedwill prove a blessing to women who mayb unexpectedly called on to defend then

A Cheap FilterFtea ths Dellautor

The mpst Impose water may bo purlby filtering through charcoal Take

large flower pot put a piece of spongeor clean moss over the hole in the bot-

tom arid fill threequarters full of equalparts clean sand and charcoal over thislay a liner cloth large enough to hangover the sides of tim pot Pour the waterInto the cloth and it will come out pure

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