Andrew Wallis’s China Notebook and Insomniac

Cure

A brief outline of my time teaching and travelling in China

2006

Yong Xing Middle School Teachers

 From the photo you can see, what most of you had already suspected, that I was employed to pretty up the place.

 This is actually my audition for Chinese Idol at a Karaoke Bar

Yong Xing Middle School Students

I thought the students were trying to show me affection until the hands went around my throat.

I suspect some of my students weren’t to happy with that lesson.

Yong Xing Middle School - My class

 With the population crisis in China, crowding has become a bit of a problem.

 These aren’t even students, this is my living room.

Cruising Down the Yangzte

 Here is me with my fellow travellers. Bill & Jan from Oz, and teachers to boot, and Fayed from Canada.

 Even though we promised not to sing anymore they made us disembark.

The Three Gorges Dam Project

Here I am looking a little disappointed. I thought the Three Gorges were three people who, like me, ate way too much food.

Leshan - Place of many large Buddhas

You have to love a place that build statues to people who also love there beer and like to dodge the salads.

I am starting to believe

in reincarnation.

The Pandas of Chengdu

The plight of the Panda was more disturbing than I realised. As you can see their love of alcohol is destroying their future. And their use of profanity also took me by surprise. Tut tut!!

Pingyao - Primary School Students

Here are some of the oompah loompahs I have employed at my new Chocolate Factory.

Xian - Natural Springs of the Concubines After having my face

slapped on numerous occasions and being branded a pervert. I quickly realised that concubines no longer lived here and that those women were merely fellow tourists. Now you tell me!!!

Terracotta Warriors - Xian

As China is famous for its pottery I thought whilst I was in China I would give pottery a go. Here are a few of my earlier attempts!

The Great Wall - Beijing

Although historians for some time believed that the wall was built to defend against marauders. I am now a firm believer in the new theory that the wall was is in fact built to keep the rabbits out.

Temple Gate - Beijing Here is my new place I bought in China. I am standing with the Real Estate guy who assures me he can also sell me a great disused stone wall and 10 000 6ft terracotta gnomes from Xian. I am becoming quite the savvy business man.

The Bund - Shanghai

Here I am looking seductive and very sweaty (380). Ok girls calm yourselves down. If I recall I was pondering what Freud would say about the cityscape of Shanghai.