you can win

YOU CAN WIN BY,

SHIV KHERA

HARSHIL K SHAHDEVANGI DOSHIUJJVAL BHATT

Topics to cover• Importance of Attitude• Success• Motivation• Self-Esteem• Interpersonal Skills• Subconscious Mind and Habits• Goal Setting• Values & Vision

Importance of Attitude• What is inside that counts like attitude.• “People can be your biggest asset or

biggest liability.”• A great building require a strong

foundation.• Opportunity is always under our feet.• The grass on the other’s side always

looks greener.• I can’t do it. – don’t know how to do or

don’t want to do.

IMPORTANCE OF ATTITUDE

Building a Positive Attitude

Factors Determining Attitude

Environment Experience

Education

Benefits of Positive Attitude• Increase productivity• Solves problem• Improves quality• Promote Teamwork• improves relationship with colleagues,

employer & customer• Lessen stress from environment• In short he will be fruit of all season who

always welcome.

Consequences of Negative Attitude

• Spreads resentment• Bitterness• A purposeless life• Ill health• High stress level

Steps for building Positive Attitude

Step 1 : Change Focus: look for the positive.Step 2 : Make a habit of doing it now.Step 3 : Develop an attitude of gratitudeStep 4 : Get into continuous education programStep 5 : Build a positive self-esteemStep 6 : Stay away from negative influencesStep 7 : Learn to like things that need to be

doneStep 8 : Start your day with something positive

Step 1: look for positive• Don’t try to find fault.• Be a digger for gold don’t see the

dirt.• Don’t criticize don’t take your stand

in opposition• Be an optimist and not a pessimist• Spend time for yourself & not to

criticize others

Step 2: make a habit of “Do it Now”• Habit of procrastination leads to

negative attitude• Live in present and don’t wait for

future• Never leave till tomorrow which

you can do today.

step 3: develop an attitude of gratitude• Count your blessings & not

troubles• Don’t complain about things what

we don’t have but thank god for what he has given us

Step 4: Be a continuous learner• Put emphasize on Value education• Be a good judge• New philosophy: be master of all & jack of

none.• Ability without right attitude is wasted.• Educated people in true sense• Know what you don’t know first• Sharp your mind like an axe• Feed your mind positive everyday• Recognize your limitation

Step 5: build a positive self esteem

• Do something for others• Don’t try but do• Don’t think that what others are

doing is none of your busyness

Step 6: Stay away from Negative Influences• Negative people• Bad habits : smoking, drug &

alcohol• Pornography• Profanity

Step 7: Learn to like the things you need to do• Take interest in work which is

compulsory

Step 8:Start your day with positive

• Put us in right frame of mind

Winners versus Losers• Be the part of answer• Have plan• “Let me do it for

you”• Optimist• “It was my fault”• Dreams & action plan• I must do something

• Work in team• Win/win attitude

• Part of a problem• Have excuse• Say: that is not my

job• Pessimist• “It wasn’t my fault”• Schemes• Something must be

done• Apart from team• Win/lose belief

Success

Winning strategies

What is success• “Success is the progressive realization

of a worthy goal.”• “Success is an endless journey”• For success we need to struggle.• “Suicide is the permanent solution

to a temporary problem.”• It is not failure but the bounce

back ability that define success.• If you want to succeed double your

failure rate.

Qualities that makes a person successful• Desire to succeed • Commitment • Responsibility• Hard work• Character• Positive believing• Give something more than you get• Persistent• Feel pride for whatever job you do• Be a student

Desire

• Whatever the mind of man can conceive & believe, the mind can achieve it

• Burning desire leads to the success

Commitment

• Play to win & don’t play for “not to lose” - that’s make the difference a lot.

• Success is not in the achievement but in the achieving.

Responsibility• Loser’s try to let things happen

where as winners make things happen

• Take responsibility & learn from the mistake.

Hard work• There is no magic wand for

success• Without hard work there is no

success• Excellence is not luck but can only

comes from a lot of hard work & practice

Character• Sum of person’s values, beliefs &

personality.• Needs to be preserved than the richest

jewel in the world.• Don’t let criticism distract you from

reaching your goal.• Learn to handle success to remain

successful : best example SACHIN • Adversity builds or reveals character

Give more than you get

• Go ahead by an extra mile.• Always think of value addition

when do some work• Don’t complete the work only by

100% but some more

Be persistent• Try & try until you get succeed.• Finish what you start

Take pride of the job done

• The quality of the work and the quality of the worker are inseparable.

Be a student : get a mentor

• Best teacher will not give something to drink but make you thirsty.

Reasons of Failure• Afraid of taking risks• Lack of persistence• Instant gratification• Lack of priorities• Looking for shortcuts• Selfishness & greed• Lack of conviction

• Planning • Not learning from

past mistakes • Fear• Inability to use

talent• Lack of discipline• Fatalistic attitude

MOTIVATIONMotivating yourself and others

everyday

What is Motivation?

• Motivation = Motive + Action• Motivation is something that

encourages action.• To motivate means to encourage and

inspire.• It is like Fire- unless you keep adding

fuel to it, it dies.• Motivation is powerful. It can persuade,

convince and propel you in to action.

Why do we need to get motivated?

• Motivation is a driving force in our lives.

• It comes from a desire to succeed.• Without success there is little pride

in life, no enjoyment or excitement at work or at home.

Can we motivate others?

• The answer is No!!!!.• We cannot motivate others, people

motivate themselves.• However we can inspire them to

motivate themselves.• In order to do this, we need to

understand their needs and wants.

Classification of Motivation

• Motivation can be classified in to two types:

Motivation

External Internal

External Motivation

• External motivation comes from outside, such as money, societal approval, fame or fear.

• Fear Motivation• The advantages of this kind of

external motivation are:-It gets the job done quickly.

Fear motivation…….. -It prevents loss, by meeting

deadlines.-In the short run the person’s performance may improve.

• The disadvantages of fear motivation are:

-It is external, which means the motivation is there while the motivator is there.

Fear motivation (Disadv.)…….. - When the motivator goes,

the motivation also goes. -It causes stress. -In the long run, performance goes down. - It destroys creativity.

Internal Motivation• Internal motivation is the inner

gratification, not for success or winning, but from the fulfillment that comes from having done it.

• It is lasting, because it comes from within and translates into self-motivation.

• The two most important motivating factors are RECOGNITION and RESPONSIBILITY.

The Four Stages from MOTIVATION to DEMOTIVATION

1. Motivated Ineffective2. Motivated Effective3. Demotivated Effective4. Demotivated Ineffective

Demotivating Factors

Some of the de motivating factors are:• Unfair criticism• Rewarding the non performer which can

be de motivating for the performer.• Lack of direction• Lack of measurable objectives.• Low self-esteem.

Demotivating Factors….

• Lack of priorities• Unfair treatment• Poor standards• Responsibility without authority.• New methods of motivation will not work

till the demotivating factors are removed.

Motivators

• The greatest motivator is Belief.• We have to inculcate in ourselves

the belief that we are responsible for our actions and behaviour.

• Doing this, improves : quality, productivity, relationships and teamwork.

Steps to Motivate others

Here are some steps to motivate others:

• Give recognition• Give respect• Be a Good listener• Throw a challenge• Help but don’t do for others what

they should do for themselves

SELF-ESTEEMBuilding positive self-esteem

and image

What is SELF-ESTEEM?• Self-esteem is how we feel about

ourselves.• It critically influences everything, from

our performance at work, our relationships to our accomplishments in life.

• It is a major component in determining success or failure.

• High self-esteem leads to happy, gratifying and purposeful life.

Advantages of High SELF-ESTEEMSelf-esteem:• Builds strong conviction.• Creates willingness to accept

responsibility.• Builds optimistic attitudes.• Makes a person self-motivated and

ambitious.

Advantages……

• Improves performance and risk-taking abilities.

• Helps a person give and receive both criticism and compliments tactfully and easily.

• Leads to better relationships and fulfilling lives.

How do we recognize poor SELF-ESTEEM?

The behavior patterns of a person with poor self-esteem are:

• They have high egos- they are arrogant- and have a “Know it all” attitude.

• They are difficult to work with and for.• They constantly make excuses- always

justifying failures.

Poor SELF-ESTEEM……

• They never accept responsibility.• They have a fatalistic attitude.• They are jealous by nature.• They are generally gossipmongers.• Their behaviour is senseless and erratic

and they have no genuine friends.• They are touchy in nature-fragile ego.

Poor SELF-ESTEEM……• They have negative expectations

of themselves and others and are seldom disappointed.

• They lack confidence.• -constantly seek approval

and validation from others.

-Bragging about themselves.

Poor SELF-ESTEEM……

-Conformist behaviour.-Lack of assertiveness.

• They lack a sense of direction.• They emphasize more on material

things.• Lack of pride in themselves.• They are takers not givers.

Some characteristics of people with:

High SELFESTEEM Low SELF-ESTEEM

Talk about ideas Talk about people

Confidence Confusion

Courage of conviction

Conformist behaviour

Accept responsibility

Fail to accept responsibility

Characteristics……Discuss Argue

Give and receive criticism

Unwilling to accept positive criticism

Guided MisguidedWilling to learn Know it all

attitudeCaring Attitude Critical AttitudeInternally Driven Externally DrivenGiver Taker

Characteristics……Better relationships and fulfilling lives

Antisocial

Respect others Looks down on others

Keep promises Escape from promises

Sensitive Touchy

Understanding Greedy

Causes of Low SELF-ESTEEM

• Negative self-talk or Negative Auto-suggestions

• Environment• Education• Making unfair comparison

Causes…..

• Unrealistic Expectations of perfection by parents, teachers and supervisors

• Lack of discipline• Teaching the wrong values

Steps to building a positive SELF-ESTEEM

• Turn Scars in to Stars• Accept responsibility• Practice Discipline• Set goals• Associate with people of High

moral character.

Steps……

• Learn to give and receive compliments• Give yourself positive Auto-Suggestions• Have patience• Become internally driven, not externally

driven• Develop a mind set that brings

happiness

INTERPERSONAL SKILLS

Building a pleasing personality

Trust

All relationships are trust relationships.

Factors that build trust are:• Reliability – gives predictability• Consistency- builds confidence• Respect• Congruence• Character

Factors that prevent building of Positive Relationships

• Selfishness• Lack of courtesy• Not meeting commitments• Self-centeredness• Negative attitude• Lack of listening, discipline, and

respect for values.

Factors……

• Suspicious nature• Anger, rude behavior• Touchy nature• Greed• Unwillingness to accept the truth• Ego• Envy - jealousy

Steps to building a POSITIVE PERSONALITY

Step 1 : Accept responsibilityStep 2 : ConsiderationStep 3 : Think Win/WinStep 4 : Choose your words

carefullyStep 5 : Don’t criticize and complainStep 6 : Smile and be kindStep 7 : Be a Good listener

Steps……..

Step 8 : Give honest and sincere appreciation

Step 9 : Discuss but don’t argueStep 10 : Be Understanding and

caringStep 11 : Develop a sense of

humorStep 12 : To have a Friend, Be a

FriendStep 13 : Be sympathetic and

show empathy

SUBCONCIOUS MIND AND HABITS

Forming positive attitude and character

• Subconscious is like the automobile Conscious is like a driver.• Weeds still grow and weeding must be continue.• The GIGO principle.

Conscious and Subconscious

Mind

How do we get Conditioned?

• Environment and Media. • Kind of books we read • kind of company we keep.

How to get programmed?

“Sustain what needs to be done, Abstain from what is detrimental until it becomes habitual.”

• Unconsciously Incompetent.

• Consciously Incompetent.

• Consciously Competent

• Unconsciously Competent

What is Habit?

“Inspiration is what gets a person started,

Motivation is what keeps him on track, and it is the……………

Habit which makes it automatic.”

Habits are a matter of the pain and pleasure principle..

Resistance to Change

• Lack the desire to change

• Lack the discipline to change

• Lack the belief that they can

change.

• Lack of awareness for the need to

change.

21-Days Formula to form Positive Habits

• Autosuggestion.• Prepare the subconscious• Translate Autosuggestion in to reality• Visualization

GOAL SETTING

Setting and Achieving your Goals.

What is Goal?

“Knowledge helps you to reach the destination ,

provided you know what the destination is.”

Dreams and wishes are nothing more than desires.

Desire become strong when they are supported by 5Ds.

• Direction

• Dedication

• Determination

• Discipline

• Deadline

Why don’t people set Goals?

• A pessimistic attitude.

• Fear of failure and fear of rejection

• Lack of ambition

• Low self esteem

• Ignorance of importance of goal.

“zero failure don't mean 100% success”

Goal should be SMART

• S- SPECIFIC

• M- MESURABLE

• A- ACHIVEBLE

• R- REALISTIC

• T- TIME BOUND

“Life is hard by the yard,but by the inch, it is cinch”

Goal should be Balanced

Life is like a wheel with six spokes,• Family• Financial• Physical• Mental• Social• Spiritual

“Aim for moon,even if you miss,You will become one of the stars.”

Activity is not the same as accomplishment

Why to aim high?

VALUES AND VISION

DOING THE RIGHT THINGS FOR

THE RIGHT REASON.

Values

“No person was ever honored for what he received.honor has been the reward for what he gave.”

How to judge our values?• Mama test

• Baba test

• Wrong concepts of money.

“No person was ever honored for what he received,honor has been the reward for what he gave”

• If people have not defined a philosophy of success,they have actually defined philosophy of failure by default.

•The most unfortunate part of life is when people plan to get money without earning it.

•People with character integrity and right values are not for sale.

•People want to be overnight success at the cost of their conscience and still it doesn’t work.

It is Priceless- CHARACTER

Commitment

Implies

• Dependability

• Reliability

• Predictability• Empathy• Consistency

•A sense of duty•Caring•Sincerity•Character•integrity •loyalty

Commitment…..

Commitment…..Commitment means surrendering our

personal wants for another person’s need.

• Commitment to friendship implies

maintaining confidentiality.

• Commitment to customer implies giving

good service.

• Commitment to job implies to integrity.

• Commitment to community implies responsibility.

Ethics

Values and ethics are not design for good

time,but also to prevent bad time.

Most of our choices today are based on

• Our desire for convenience,comfort and pleasure

• Our feelings

• Social fads and ads

•Ethics and legality•Purpose of life.•Winning is an event,being winner is a spirit.

•What is goodness?

What affects Ethics?

• Greed

• Fear

• Pressure.

Changing Values-Today's Values

• Win by hook or crook

• There is sadness for getting caught rather than regret for having done wrong.

Try not to be a man of success,

But rather try to be a man of value.

Vision

•Lack of vision results in to failure.

•Everything that we see today was a

dream before it became reality.

•Live with enthusiasm, direction and

sense of purpose.

IF THE UNIVERSE IS ACCIDENT,WE ARE ACCIDENTS BUT THERE IS MEANING IN UNIVESE,THERE IS MEANING IN US ALSO” -- EINSTEIN

WINNING VS WINNER.

IT IS BETTER TO DESERVE AN HONOUR AND NOT HAVE IT, THAN TO HAVE IT AND NOT DESERVE IT.

-MARK TWAIN

WINNERS ARE GRACIOUS.

AFTER A WINNER MANY HAVE PUT EFFORTS.