allure 26 june 2016

June 26, 2016

Super Wedding Planners

Ndidi ObiOha

ElOhOr aisiENFuNkE

buckNOr

IssueThe Wedding

PEOPLE

FASHION

• Fadan Inaugurates New Executive• Cointreau Creative Crew Launches In Nigeria

Wining And Dining Etiquette For Weddings

Contents26/06

15

54

Editor’s Note

The role of a professional wedding planner in the success of a wedding ceremony came to fore, for many of us , in Jeniffer Lopez’s memorable movie, ‘Wedding Planner.’ Prior to that romantic flick, a wedding was family, friends and the couple; cut cake, ‘chop rice’ and go.But, there is a lot more that goes into planning a wedding. These days, weddings are status symbol; an indication of just how stylish and bouyant a family is.

Enter the wedding planner. Nigeria has a penchant for catching on to a trend and making it its own. Our weddings have become, by far, the most prominent in display of opulence in the world. Elsewhere, you might have a few flamboyant weddings but here, every other wedding of the rich and famous is an attempt to overwhelm and outdo what has been done before.To help our vagaries, the wedding planning professionals - led by the leading planners in the country - who feature on our cover today, ensure that the lavish taste of the couple or their families are satisfied or even surpassed.

We call the trio ‘super wedding planners’; that, they certainly are. Between the three, the most lavish and talked about wed-dos have been organised.Funke Bucknor, Ndidi Obioha and Elohor Aisien take us through their glamorous world of planning and executing the perfect wedding ceremony.

It’s another wedding issue. And, you are welcome!

Have a great week!

e m a i l : a l l u r e f o r t h e w o r l d @ v a n g u a r d n g r . c o m

Remmy DiagbareR .

@ Vanguardallure1

Elohor Aisien, Ndidi Obioha & Funke Bucknor; Super Wedding Planners

6COVER STORY

Quotes...“The first thing I did when I sold my book was buy a new wedding ring for my wife and asked her to marry me all over again”.

- Nicholas Sparks

JEMI EKUNKUNBOR YEMISI SULEIMAN

FATIMA GARBAPAMELA ECHEMUNOR

CHIBOK GIRLS: 500 days and counting.

“Many people spend more time in planning the wedding than they do in planning the marriage”.

- Zig Ziglar

What To Wear To A Wedding

154

[email protected] [email protected]

[email protected] [email protected]

TEAM

EDITORREMMY DIAGBARE

DEPUTY EDITORJEMI EKUNKUNBOR

ASST. EDITORYEMISI SULEIMANSTYLE REPORTER

PAMELA ECHEMUNORCONTRIBUTORS

PRINCESS KATE EMIKOBAMIYO ISELEMA EMINA

JEROME CODJO-YAOVIONIPEDE

CONT. EDITORLATASHA NGWUBECOPY EDITORDODOIYI WILLIAM-WESTCORRESPONDENTSFATIMA GARBADAVINA AYODELELAYOUT / DESIGNGREGORY OBIOLAYIWOLA AJAGBEPHOTOOSCAR OCHIOGU(08034746487)

“Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive”.

- Elbert Hubbard

ONLINEEDITOR: JEMI EKUNKUNBOR

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Apapa, Lagos.For advertisement / enquiries, call DEBBIE:

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GINGHAM

FASH ION

WEEKLY FAB LIST!!!By - Fatima Garba

ALLURE’S

Looking for the latest trends to transition into? Hopefully our weekly fab list will help you decide the major trends to keep you looking fab all day and all week.

June 26, 2016 / 3

Go festive with sequins and sparkle. This season try burgundy, green, and navy instead of more traditional black or silver for added unexpected, head-turning detail as seen by Gucci.

SEQUINS AND SPARKLE

BRIGHT AND BOLD STRIPESClassic stripes get an update this season in a spectrum of colours. Whether you reach for a statement coat or stock up on tanks to pair with your favourite denim, brighten up your wardrobe with wide and bold stripes this season as seen on the runways at Ralph Lauren, Stella McCartney and Christian Dior shows.

This season’s denim is kicking it up a notch with indigo printed

patterns, subtle acid washing, and eyelet

texture. Pick up the new style in silhouettes from wide leg jeans to

high-waisted skirts.

DONE-UP DENIMS

Typically a youthful trend,gingham has grown up this season. Look for tailored trousers and mid-length dresses in this classic print to add a bit of chic to your look.Designers such as J.Crew,and Victoria Beckham had this trend all over the runways this season.

GREEn SEquInED DRESS

STELLA MCCARTnEY PRInTED DEnIM BAG

nIChoLSon ToShIMA GInGhAM ToP

oSCAR DE LA REnTA GInGhAM SKIRT

STELLA MCCARTnEY BoLD STRIPED DRESS

BRIGhT BoLD STRIPED ToP

PREEn PRInTED DEnIM DRESS

ChRISTIAn LouBouTIn GLITTER BLuE hEELS

Kerry WAShington in SEqUin SpARkLy tREnd

FASH IONFASH ION

/ June 26, 20164 June 26, 2016 / 5

WHAT TO WEAR TO A WEDDINGWith the wedding season on us, one of the most fun, but also the most agonizing part of being a wedding guest, is figuring out the right dress to wear. But this doesn’t have to be a problem because most wedding invitations, come with dress or colour code for both families and even friends. So in this regard, the first thing to do is to do a little research on acceptable looks for that level of formality or occasion. In Nigeria, the usual wedding attire for women, is the traditional wrapper or lace dresses or skirt and blouse, complete with the traditional head gear-aso oke or scarf.However, if you are not one for the traditional look, there are lots of dresses in different colours and styles that you can wear to a wedding. One rule applies to everyone; never wear all white to a white wedding. Since white is the traditional bridal colour, you do not want to appear to be competing with the bride.Here are some suggestions on what to wear to every type of wedding.

By - Yemisi Suleiman

This dress silhouette is known for its straight up and down cut (no waist or belt) and is flattering on most women.

If you want to go super-glam to any wedding ceremony, try a one shoulder dress to give yourself a goddess vibe. Whether you go with a long or short silhouette, this tried-and-true dress style, will definitely make you stand out for the occasion.

Lace is one of Nigerian women’s best fabrics; it is never out of fashion. From short, long to midi length dresses, with lace, the options are endless.

SHIFT DRESS

ONE SHOULDER

LACE DRESS

This versatile length works for both beach side weddings and formal events alike. Look for vivid colours, great prints and flattering cuts for your body type.

MAXIHere are some additional things to consider when deciding what to wear to a wedding:• Don’t show too much skin. If you wear a short dress, cover up the cleavage. Never wear a midriff revealing outfit to a wedding.• Do look for dresses in pretty feminine prints like florals, and in bright cheerful colours.• Keep your underwear out of sight. A wedding is not the place to show off your sexy, lacy bra.• Don’t wear something too sexy just because weddings are never an occasion for inappropriate

levels of cleavage, thigh visibility or gratuitous cut-outs.• Don’t go overboard on heavy, chunky jewellery; instead, try the personal jewellery trend.• Don’t wear black or sequins to a daytime wedding, as those are colours and details best reserved for evening occasions. (The sparkle will make you look overdressed.)• Lastly, make sure your clothes fit and are comfortable for sitting, eating, walking around, and dancing. You don’t want to be the person fidgeting with your dress throughout the ceremony and reception.

Tips To Note:

A pretty ruffled hem is absolutely perfect for weddings, tired ruffles have a sweet, feminine look that makes your entire style seem softer.

RUFFLE

Go glam the traditional way with the iro and buba, complete with the head tie. It’s the perfect choice for most Nigerian ladies for weddings.

BUBA AND IRO

Give your wedding guest outfit some sparkle with an embellished dress. Look for pretty details on the bodice or waist for a bit of shine. Save all over beading for black-tie or formal events.

EMBELISHED

tOke makINWa

NdIdI OBIOHa

lINda ejIOfOr

One SHOulder lOOk

lace dreSS by HOuSe Of deOla

DoubLe Drop LuciTe earriNGS

bLac cLuTch baG

embeLiSheD burGuNDy DreSS

shIFt dress

DoubLe Drop earriNGS

chriSTiaN LoubouTiN peep ShoeS

bLack aND GoLD heeLS

oNe ShouLDer Drap

h & m Lace DreSS

GoLD embLiSheD heeLS

marcheSa cap sLeeve GoWN

They are three strong women, wives, mothers, and business owners driven by passion for what they do-

event planning. After graduation and a stint at 9-5 day job, all three, found the

pull to organise things too strong to ignore.

Today, they get paid taking the burden off brides’ and other corporate bodies who require their services to plan high-

REPORTAGE

By - Jemi Ekunkunbor

Super Wedding Planners

June 26, 2016 / 7

REPORTAGE

Funke studied Law at the University of Lagos but after a stint at practicing, she left saying: “I knew this was not my thing”. She didn’t find fulfilment in

advertising either. Encouraged by a cousin to turn her passion into a business, with doubt, she decided to give it a try. Her first job earned her between N10,000-N13,000. But that move over 12 years ago, eventually gave birth to Zapphaire Events, one of the leading event planning companies in Nigeria. She continues to horn her skill with annual trainings abroad.

Planning A Wedding Is Like Nurturing A Baby

- Funke Bucknor-Obruthe

What do you look out for first when a client comes to you?

The first thing will be to understand and find out what it is exactly they want because a lot of people

don’t know what they want. You have to get to know your client well because you cannot give ideas or brief when you don’t know the client. Some people want an elegant type of wedding, some others want

end luxury events and parties.In this encounter, they talk

about what goes into event planning and share their most memorable wedding planned.

Creative Director: Nelly MesikPhotography: Bamiyo Emina

Makeup: Joanne and Evelyn for Zaron CosmeticsHair: Abbey Crystal Signature

Styling: All outfits were from Enthyst Fashion Klinik

Funke BucknOR

elOhOR Aisien

•Bucknor-Obruthe

ndidi OBiOhA

...I am a home person. I love chilling, spending time with my family.

June 26, 2016 / 9

REPORTAGE

draining but fulfilling when at the end of the day, you see the joy on the faces of the couple and their parents. That is satisfactory for me.

What about those who think they need a planner but have very lean budget. Is there a place for them?

There are many things we probably want but cannot afford. I always tell people that if you cannot get a planner, you can always get a day coordinator or get resources materials like my book, The Essentials Bridal Handbook. It’s an advisory book. I also have a Vlog series on how to plan every aspect of your wedding. But there is always a planner that you can afford. I don’t see a planner as an expensive venture, I see it as a necessary venture.

With event planning, what’s new in the industry? It’s so funny that what is new today may not be

new tomorrow. I remember that at the beginning of last year, the trend was about special effects but it’s now going away. For example, branding on the stationary or even the music where the wedding is almost done as if it is a production; everything is rehearsed, everything is choreographed. That is new. The effective use of good lighting is another. There are people doing their IVs like video or cartoon save the date. You have pre wedding photo shoots that are out of this world. Brides are having coloured bridal dresses now. So breaking out of the norm or tradition and doing things a little differently that is what is new.

How was your very first planned wedding?My first planned wedding was of my friend Moji. I

was new to the business and didn’t know anything. She gave me the chance. I remember she paid me N10,000 or N12,000. She gave me an aspect of the wedding to plan and I used that to get better. People thought it was excellent. After that, I did Florence Okoli’s wedding. I had no clue but I had read and practised with a few friends’ wedding when I was doing it for free. I made sure I paid attention to details. I followed up on every single service provider: video, photo, cake, decoration etc. It was excellently coordinated. After that wedding, we got other jobs.

When a client comes, what is the first thing you want to see?

The first thing I want to see is chemistry. It is very important. I need to be able to feel the client. I want to see a client that is able to bring out the creativity in me, not a client that is coming to impose her ideas. And when I see a client that is willing to give me the free hand to work, it makes it easier for me. So for me, it’s very important that there is that chemistry between us.

Everything a planner would do today used to be the business of the entire family to take care of. How did we get to the point that everybody now needs a planner?

Well, I think now people are beginning to realise that things need to be handled professionally. When you leave things to family and committees to handle, what happens on the day of the event? First and foremost, family and friends handling stuff for you will take care of their own people. Now when you are inviting people for an event, you invite people from different blocks of life whom you have known at different times. Now, some of these people that you have handed over things to that are not professional planners, usually will take care of those they know first and people that you as the host have Sinvited will end up not being properly taken care of. And that

REPORTAGE

/ June 26, 20168

A perfect hostess and an interviewer’s delight, there is never a thing she dreams that she never follows through to realisation. Extremely creative and constantly

breaking new frontiers, Ndidi Obioha has been described as a serial entrepreneur.On graduation in 1997 from the Obafemi Awolowo University where she studied International Relations, she started her career in advertising, moved to telecommunication and then to banking before leaving paid job to become an entrepreneur.

She started business with the establishment of a hair salon, Hair craft. From styling brides hair, she saw an opening in event planning and set up Enthyst Events Limited. From there, she delved Into bridal business and on to retailing exclusive red carpet dresses. Only recently, she launched an event planning show on TV scheduled to air in July. She is already working on her next line of business.

My First Job Got Me Three Others- Ndidi Obioha

their wedding to be fun. People have different things they are looking for in a wedding. So when you get to know your client, you get to know and understand their personalities and that will allow you to be able to answer the brief. After consulting with them, you now create a concept for them that will actualize their dream. Everything has to have a synergy from entertainment to decor to design because it’s about event design and production.

How did we get to the point where we started needing a planner?

I think it was born out of a need in the society, something that was lacking. I remember when I started over 12 years ago, people didn’t know or understand why they needed a wedding planner. I remember trying to convince people that they needed a planner for their events. Some people dismissed me, some gave me a chance and I will forever celebrate those who gave me a chance. In those days, when family planned the wedding, you see a lot of love but you also see a lack of professionalism and it’s what you see that you get on your wedding day. But when you are paying somebody to do a job, you know that you can command and demand things of them. So we needed this in Nigeria because we needed to take things to the next level. Apart from us wanting to have a fun event and a lovely day, there is a better way to do things. If you are using family, who are you going to pay to get to the venue a day before? Is it your mum or dad? They will have other things to do. So event planning was born out of necessity because society was also changing. So many things have evolved with event planning we needed to move in that direction.

What is it like planning an event?Planning an event for me is like solving a puzzle

or having a baby, nurturing that baby, and watching him grow. It drains one emotionally because we are mentally and physically involved. Event planning is about details and when it is a wedding, it is emotional because you are dealing with the emotions of both families and friends. You also have to manage expectations and be diplomatic. So you are the friend, the budget keeper, the event designer. It’s

The key thing was that as an Igbo wedding, for once, people ate on time. Everything was perfect and the bride would tell anyone that she had a planner.

Guests who don’t buy aso ebi often complain that gifts do not get to them. Do you subscribe to aso ebi and are there things you counsel your clients to do or not to do?

Sometimes, people are at liberty to do what they want but at times, I think they put pressure on a lot of people as well as themselves. If somebody buys aso ebi and you feel you should give the person a gift, there is nothing wrong with that. Giving gifts at a wedding is not compulsory. Sometimes at our weddings, we over estimate or underestimate. Sometimes you invite 300 people but 500 show up. What do you do? You just find a way to arrest the situation. But when we plan, we budget for extra and plan crises management.

Share with us the most memorable wedding that you planned?

I think one of the most memorable weddings for me, has been one that first of all, was strictly by invitation. It was very controlled. We had only 400 guests. It was very intimate, with family and friends. There was no stranger. The bride and groom knew every single guest that came. The bride and groom celebrated their parents in a way that made people cry. All my team members were in tears. The wedding was so full of love. The music was good, the decor was beautiful, the sitting was intimate and we got so many jobs from that one. There was so much love between the couple and the family. The tension was less. People came to celebrate them. There are weddings where people come to laugh at the celebrant.

When you are not working, what do you love to do?

I am a home person. I love chilling, spending time with my family and friends and also busy on my phone.

Where is your holiday destination?None. I like staying at home.

isn’t just right. So people are beginning to realise just that. Once you invite somebody to a party, who ever is in charge, doesn’t need to know that guest to make sure that that guest is satisfied having attended your event. That realisation of this is what is making people use the services of a planner, somebody who will be unbiased, a professional to be bale to handle the event.

What is it like planning an event?The truth is passion is what drove me into event

planning and because of that, it’s fun for me. I actually party when i’m doing an event. When you know your onions and understand what you are doing, then it comes natural to you and just makes it easy. Planning is a natural calling for me because, I love to organise and conceptualise ideas. I love the idea that I can be creative. I can go as far as I want to go to bring in my ideas to bear noting the personality of whoever I am doing their event be it an individual or brand. All that comes into play in conceptualising the idea for the event. So for me, planning is fun and brings out the creativity in me and makes me think outside the box.

Is it that creativity that has taken you to TV?Well, The Event pro is something new that I came

up with to let people know what it takes to put an event together; the fun, the drama, the madness and the pressure because people don’t know or realize the significant role the planner plays. You as the host will not be at the venue the night before. You need to catch your beauty sleep but as long as you left the event in the hands of the planner, then you can truly have your beauty sleep knowing that every vendor that you had contracted is there to deliver on what you had agreed upon. So those are the roles the planner plays. Sometimes the client contacts the

vendors directly and bring in the planner as co-ordinator.

Event Pro, shows you the behind the scene activities and makes you see why you need a planner. Watching the show will also help you see all that a planner has to go through on your behalf. The show will be aired on Africa Magic come July.

What innovation is there in the event planning business?

Your creativity is the innovation you bring in this business. No one brief is the same. When you are given a brief, the way you conceptualise and define that brief brings about the creativity with which you are going to deliver that event. But we try to invest in ourselves by going for courses, conferences and seminars abroad where a lot of the new stuff not as a planner but vendors are shown. So we come back here and ginger our vendors to come up with something new and innovative having seen what is obtainable outside the country.

How was your very first professionally planned event?

When you’ve planned so many events, it becomes difficult to remember. But I remember this one because my very first job got me three other weddings. When I left the bank, I started the salon Hair craft at Yaba then. We then became the official hair stylist for MBGN. Later, we also became the official salon for the Wedding planner Magazine. A lot of brides would come to have their hair done. I am very creative with the hair styles because I would consult with the brides to come up with great ideas. I would chat with the brides and even talk about how I planned my wedding. And one day, one of them said to me “aunty come and plan my wedding “ . She seemed frustrated at the time. That was how I got in. And when she asked how much I will charge, I had no idea because I have never charged. Eventually, I think I charged her N100,000. That wedding got us three other weddings.

What is your view of the concept of Aso ebi especially where some people complain of poor treatment because they did not wear one?

The truth is that aso ebi is usually a personal thing. There are no hard and fast rules to it. You have certain clients that must have that aso ebi. I am strictly a wedding planner. We now have what we call aso ebi planners. It is handled by them.

I think it’s been over done. You can have a dress code or colour code so that everybody is not wearing one freaky colour. It now makes it more interesting because you see people come in different colours and styles. That I would rather have than everybody wearing same thing. When you get a little more creative with aso ebi, that is when the concept is appealing and more interesting.

Which of the weddings you’ve planned is the most memorable and why?

I have planned very memorable weddings. I think I’ve been so lucky so far that I haven’t had a bad experience. So it’s a tough question because every bride that I have worked with, always call me to bless me and thank me. That can’t be bought. When I get that it becomes memorable. An event consultant is like a medical doctor. If you are not truthful with what your budget is so that the event planner knows how to handle it, for instance, if you say to your event planner I am expecting 600 people and you end up bringing 1,000 people, that is a recipe for disaster. We’ve been lucky to tackle such challenges as they come but trust me, it can be very challenging. Other than that, it’s been an amazing journey and I would do it over and over again.

What is the most important element of a wedding that you’ d like to see?

I am very big on ambience. What I’ve realised is that when the ambience is beautiful, it sets the guests in the right mood and gets them ready to enjoy the party.

...when the ambience is beautiful, it sets the guests in the right mood.

•Obioha

/ June 26, 201610

When you meet a client, what do you want to see before consultation starts?

The first thing I want to see is trust. It’s very important for them to trust me. When your client trusts you, your job is easier. I am very particular when it comes to parties and weddings. It has to be what I also want because of my brand. Now we are more luxury but it doesn’t mean expensive. When I meet a client, I try to get them to be on the same page with me. I get to know them personally by doing a research on them and to know what they like. The most important thing here is how the wedding or event turns out. If I don’t get along with my client from the beginning, nothing is going to work well on that day. So

REPORTAGE

Luxury Is About The Details Not Price

Popularly known for her annual model search, “Elite Model Look”, not many know she is a wedding planner as well. The Business and Information Technology

graduate of the then, London Guildhall University, started planning in 2008 and branched into wedding planning in 2013. The former beauty queen, who specialises in planning luxury weddings and events, has trained with some of the best luxury planners in the world--Mark Niemierko, London, Preston Bailey- New york, Sarah Haywood -London, and Karen Tran Pugali Italy.

Only recently in April, she was part of the destination wedding planners Congress in Florence, Italy where she was a guest speaker.The CEO of Prive Luxury Events also runs a bridal store, Prive Atelier where she sells designer wedding dresses.

- Elohor Aisien

/ June 26, 2016

first is for my client to trust me and trust my ideas. I listen to them and also learn from them.

You have pitched your tent with doing luxury events. Why?

When I decided to do events, I was looking for something different, something unique because a lot of people were doing the same thing. And I know Nigerians spend a lot of money on parties but it is not about the money but about the small details. So for me, with my clients, I look for people who understand what luxury is, people who like unique details like the flowers, the set up that makes it look luxury. You don’t have to have a room full

of flowers for it to be luxury. It may just be how the flower is arranged or where it is placed that will make it look nice and classy. Too much of colour and everything is not good. You go into a room and see all red or all white. Every colour has its moods.

What does planning an event entail?Planning an event means everything to me. Apart from

making money, I have to enjoy it. It’s not easy, you have to be very patient, you have to be organized and be ready for the kinds of clients you’d meet. You’d meet some brides that will stress you, you’d meet some brides that are very easy going. You have to be humble whatever the job. Patience for me is the most important thing. Sometimes, I get called upon to plan an event within 24 hours. I have done that a few times. I can’t say no. My clients are very important to me and I have clients that I organize private parties for that I can’t put on social media. So we are particular about the people we meet. We are like a one-stop shop and we do everything from start to finish, from what the bride is wearing or the groom to flowers, to where they can go and shop or where they can go on honeymoon etc.

When you plan for a cross cultural wedding, how do you ensure balance on both sides?

I have one of such coming up soon and I think as a planner, this is very important. You have to know both cultures and understand both families and how to manage them and deal with them in a mature way. We plan for food on the same level, and implement some cultural stuff on both sides so that there is a balance.What is new in terms of wedding planning that can make a wedding really great?

What’s new is bringing new things into my game, furniture, decor etc. I believe every wedding shouldn’t be the same. I have a whole warehouse of things I use and rent out as well. There are different things that I come up with which I cannot say here.

Can you recall your first paid planned wedding? My first planned wedding was of a friend whom I had

known for years. This friend was the one planning his own wedding because he is from the north. And he would call me for phone number of a photographer, and I would give him, then he would call for another thing. At some point, I just said to him, let me plan your wedding. And he was very happy. What he didn’t know was that I had always wanted to be a planner from when I was 20. So I started planning two months to the wedding. When I got there, I made my input and they were happy. I was planning for a bigger wedding and they were planning for less. At the end of the day, what I told them was what happened. Till date it remains one of my favourite because it was stress free. The bride was so simple and they just gave me everything to work with.

The concept of Aso ebi, do you subscribe to it?Yes, aso ebi for me is very important, it is our culture.

We can’t escape it. Recently, I was in Italy for the destination wedding planner congress where I was a speaker and I had a presentation and everyone was in love with how colourful our weddings are especially with the aso ebi. I don’t think we appreciate it as much as people do outside. For me, aso ebi is very important. What I am not very keen about is make up. I see more guests wearing make up than the bride. I feel it shouldn’t be so. Recently, I was going out with some friends to a wedding and they were all seriously made up. That surprised me a bit because they were more made up than the bride. And I was like, are you serious? I think it should be the bride that should be beautiful. You go to a wedding, you don’t know who is the bride and who is the guests. The guests are all heavily made up. Maybe the bride needs to step up her game, come out of the box with new hairstyles then the regular look.

Also, I want to see brides go away from the classic wedding gown to start wearing pink wedding dresses, red wedding dresses, etc.

Which of the weddings you have done stands memorable for you?

Ok. It would be this one wedding in Dubai. I love destination weddings. With destination weddings, you have few family and friends and you are able to get everything you need to have the job done compared to one done here where you have challenges getting things you need to work. It was fun. I loved working for the client, I loved the decor. Everything was just fine.

What won’t you do as a planner?I will never tell my client it’s not possible. Everything is

possible.

....When your client trusts you, your job is easier.•Aisien

L IFESTYLE

June 26, 2016 / 11

Wining And Dining Etiquette For Weddings

by - Pamela Echemunor

After the “I dos” at the church, it’s time to wine and dine and make merry. Most people tend to skip the church service altogether and attend the reception party (no judging), but then there are certain rules and guidelines to follow when attending a reception, so at to avoid interrupting the flow of things for the planner. Here are a few wining and dining etiquettes for guests at a wedding reception.

Receptions can last between 7-8 hours, depending on when the couple leaves the church. The most appropriate time to get to a reception venue is at least an hour after the church service and this is considering traffic, except of course the venue is close to the church.

While eating in public, it’s paramount not to eat with your mouth full, this rule applies to all events, whether it’s a date or a party, whatever the occasion, chew and swallow before speaking or risk splattering all over the next person.

In most cultures, using cutlery is a paramount part of dining. But in most parts of the world especially in Africa, eating with ones bare hands is custom. So if you really need to eat with your hand, don’t be shy, but remember, some foods actually require cutlery.

Is it right to request for more food? The answer is maybe and maybe not, but who cares, you’re are at a wedding, if you feel the flow of food and drinks is sufficient, then why not, but try not to be a grub. Survey to ensure everyone else has enough before you strike.

When it’s time to toast at a wedding, it’s customary to raise your glass, but make sure it has something in it. Toasting with an empty glass is rumoured to bring bad luck, so fill your glass up, stand and raise it up to the couple cheerfully.

Toast

Cutlery Or Not

Sitting At One Spot Or Moving Around

Speaking With A Full Mouth

Arrival Time

FoodSome couples leave the early hours of the reception for the folks and more seasoned family and friends, then the later part of the day is for the ones who want to shake and boogie. No fault here, just keep it simple and have fun.

THE PROPOSAL SYNDROME

After the initial excitements from you and your girlfriends, narrating endless of times how he went down on his knees and all those stuffs we girls always gist about, you are left to deal with the rest on your own. (Well, the nice ones can stay behind and discuss the role they are willing to play) most wom-en soon realize that engagement is one of the most significant psychological transitions in their lives.The engagement stage is more than simply planning a big party/wedding. It involves introspection and emotional analysis. It involves open communication with your fiancé, family and friends. It involves acceptance of fear and dealing with over whelming excitements. Once a bride realizes the complexity of this transition, she can address her emotions and move forward in planning for both a fabulous party and a successful next chapter in her life.

Deep down, the newly engaged woman often feels some unexpected emotions of fear and anxiety.

Let me guess, MR RIGHT proposed or you have this uneasy feeling that any moment from now, he might just pop that big question you’ve been waiting to hear since you find yourself in that state you have no control over love.

It is these important internal details that an engaged woman must face and confront, if she ever hopes to arrive at the altar fully prepared to enter into a healthy marriage.

Eight years in the wedding business, I have seen a lot of cranky, frustrated, angry, tired even depressed brides. I must confess, it has never been funny having to deal with them. These emotions could be as a result of some unresolved conviction within the bride’s sub-conscious mind while in other cases, it might be as a result of stress. A bride once said to me on her wed-ding day “I don’t think I love him, I think I just like him”. It was that day the preacher in me was born!!!

Anxiety/Adrenaline RushWhat am I going to wear? My wedding has to be my friend’s conversations for months, which venue am I using? I’m not too tall, I need a shoe that would make me stand out and I need to look S-P-E-C-T-A-C-U-L-A-R! Which makeup artist should I use? Seriously? Ladies, you need to relax!! Slow down, take a deep breath and avoid health issues because things can’t go well if you are all messed up.

FearHave you asked yourself recently “hope I’m not mak-ing a mistake?”, “Is he the right guy for me?” These questions most times, create confusion and fear you have never experienced before. There is no other time in your life when you are truly giving up one identity for another. The transition is more complex than simply taking a new last name, a literal change of identity and a decision that brings with its own set of questions and anxieties.

You are also giving up your identity as a single woman. Women often worry, “I’m losing my youth” or “I’m spending the rest of my life with this guy” A stage in your life, the only stage you have ever experi-enced is ending and many women experience feelings of loss as a chapter closes on their lives.

Accepting Your Feelings In reality, these thoughts could not be more normal. In every other major life transition, simultaneous feelings of loss and gain are not only expected, but encouraged. When you graduated from secondary school, when you graduated from the university, when you moved away from your home, when you left your first job for a better opportunity, those around you understood and sympathized with your conflicting emotions. But, did those feelings of sad-ness and loss hinder you from taking that next step and succeeding with flying colours? Of course not! You allowed yourself to address and analyse your thoughts, then you proceeded with the change. This is exactly what you need to do during your engage-ment as you prepare for your journey to the altar and marriage. It is important to realize that feelings of fear and anxiety are normal and not a sign your guy is not good enough. Discuss and analyse them with those around you. Don’t allow your friends and family to focus solely on the wedding planning details to the exclusion of your internal struggles.

Feel free, relieve yourself of unnecessary stress and smile through it all. You know why? Because a smile is the best makeup you can ever wear.

The

WeddingP L A N N E R

/ June 26, 201612

FEATURE

by - Ibiyeye Titilayo Muinat

Tiyilayi Ibiyemi is a wedding vendor; a makeup artist and a jeweller . she is also a Wedding consultant.

TERI SpeaksGood day Teri,

Please send me the 1-6 this things I should not eat before bed through my email. My name is Hon, I read and saw your column via vanguard news papers. Hon

Dear Hon, Thank you for your mail and enquiry. Below are the first six

things you should not eat before bed.Peanut Butter, Icecream, Alchohol, Candy bars, red meat &

celery. Best wishes, TM.

011HEALTHY LIVINGby - Teri Mendes

For comments and questions please email [email protected], @terimendes. I would love to hear from you, till next week. - it’s ta ta for now! XOXO

6. You Can Work from Home with a Child (But Only Up to a Point)

There are two periods of your children’s lives when working from home with them is a breeze: Before they’re walking (e.g., when they can entertain themselves by discovering their toes) and after they’re old enough to understand that when you’re working from home, you’re really not available. If your kid is good at entertaining him/herself, working from home is easy, but it might still give you pangs of guilt when your attention is divided. It’s hard for parents to say “No, I’m busy now” several times a day. So even if you’re lucky enough to get to work from home, a nanny or a daycare comes in handy once your child is old enough. 7. Don’t Worry If Your Child Isn’t Reaching Development Milestones but Be Proactive

Every child develops on his or her own timeframe. So try not to rush getting your child to talk, walk, run, or read. They grow up all too fast anyway. And with potty training, it will only happen when the child is ready so, don’t be in a rush. Only the flip side I do encourage crosschecking the children’s milestones and making sure you are on track. A good way to do this is

the ASQ Questionnaire, type that into Google and add your Child’s age in and it will come out, based on communication, cognitive, fine motor skills, gross motor skills and problem solving categories. I find it extremely helpful as a guide. It’s also a more proactive way to tackle issues as opposed to just worrying.8. You Can Never Take Too Many Pictures or Videos

In the first few years, you’re probably going to constantly take pictures and videos. Sadly, that falls off as you and they get older. You will never regret having too many pictures of your rapidly growing child, though, so it’s something to watch out for.

It also helps if you develop a habit of organizing your photos and videos soon after you take them. Otherwise, you’ll have a mess of images and videos that are as daunting as the

thousands of emails you have in your inbox.Most important, though: Back up, back up and back

up your photos and videos, both locally and offsite. We like Crashplan for an automated, bulletproof backup system. Those files are probably the most precious ones to save (and the only ones you can never, ever recreate).9. Going Out—Anywhere—Will Never Be the Same

Once you become a parent, time shifts. What used to be a five-minute run to the shops or market will now take forty-five minutes to account for bundling, dawdling, snack-packing, car-seat-fiddling, and other extra steps.

Eating out is also a whole new experience. There are Cheerios on the floor to feel guilty about, crayons to keep from rolling off the table, and angry-looking fellow diners (at least in your mind) to deal with. And if you manage to get out for a date night alone with your significant other, you’ll probably spend all of the time talking or worrying about your child. 10. You Will Never Be the Same

Parenting changes you. I expected this, but I didn’t expect just how radically it would. It’s not like you turn

Hope this helps! Let me know what surprised you as a new parent. I’d love to hear from you email me - [email protected]

HEALTH

BECOMING A PARENTThings That Might Surprise You10

into your mom or dad overnight, but your values, perspective, and habits get realigned to one single creature: your child (or your children, if you have more than one).

It also means:• Yourhabitsmightchangeforthebetter.You’ll

thinkmoreaboutthenutritionalvalueofyourfood,drivingsafely,spendingmoneymorewisely,livinglonger,andexemplifyinggoodethics.

• Poopwillnolongerbetaboo(ifiteverwas).Oh,thepoopstoriesyouwillbeabletotellwhenyou’reaparent.

• Yourrelationshipwithyourpartnerwillchange.Youcan’treallyknowuntilithappenswhetherit’sforbetterorworse,butparentingchangestheotherpersontooandhowyoulookathim/her.

• Youmayhavetopartwithpreviousentertainmentchoices.(PlayvideogamesandwatchTV?Sure,butnowit’sTalkingTomandMyLittlePony/Voltron.)

• Youwillnevertakefreetimeforgrantedagain.

• Youmightactuallyhavemorefunandbecomemorecreative.(Inventingdogcostumes,drawingonthesidewalk,andtryingnewwaystomakepeasappealingweren’tonmyto-dolistbefore.)

• Youwilllikelyexperiencealoveandabondthatyounevercould’veimagined.

Finally, remember none of the negative stuff on this list—as terrible and messy as they sound—will really bother you in the long run. You’ll discover many new things about yourself as a parent—things that make you stronger, and more vulnerable in a sense too. Author Elizabeth Stone made this terribly true observation: “Making the decision to have a child is historic. It is to decide forever to have your heart walking around outside your body.” I think most parents would agree that it is so, so worth it. Just think of this as mental preparation.

June 26, 2016 / 13

... CONTINUED FROM LAST WEEK

PerfectBodynot just slimming but fitnessKATHY EMIKO

HEALTH101News

Diets don’t work – why? Because the second you start observing one is the moment you start resenting it. Even if you manage to follow your choice of diet through to the bitter end, it is rare to find the lost weight staying off. More commonly it comes straight back on again, simply because you quickly resume your ‘normal’ eating habits.

EAT RIGHT TO LOSE WEIGHT!A LONG TERM VIEW

A frighteningly common occurrence in recent years is to find yourself stuck in a vicious circle of yo-yo dieting. Too many magazines and books offer the elusive holy grail of ‘lose weight quick’ – which simply doesn’t exist. All you end up doing is putting all the so-called ‘weight’ (usually more water than fat) back on and mucking up your metabolism in the process.

All these diets focus on a short-term policy of ‘don’t eat this for a few weeks and all your wishes will be achieved’. This is blatantly untrue, and anyone who advocates such measures should be ashamed. You should be looking at long-term goals based on what you should and can eat to stay fit, healthy and slim.

On top of all this is the physiological impact that results from constantly ‘failing’ at diets. I spend a lot of my working life undoing both the physiological and psychological problems that long-term yo-yo diets

bring – namely, incredibly low self body image and metabolisms that don’t know whether they’re coming or going.

The good news is that all this can be undone with a little love and patience – from you, that is. It requires time and effort to do so, but think of the reward – how about never having to stand in front of a mirror and feel ashamed, disgruntled or worried about how you look? It is fantastic to feel positive about your body (even if it has, as everybody does, a minor sag or a dimpling of cellulite) and to enjoy feeding it with healthy nutritious foods.

My philosophy is that we all know (albeit sometimes very deep down) exactly what we shouldn’t be eating, and it is this way of thinking that has helped me give many people long-term and happy weight loss. You are also the one who knows how much of the

excess fat you want to burn off, and what your exact motivations are. Now, with all that

experience and knowledge bound up inside of you, shouldn’t you be able to lose that fat

once and for all?Of course, we all need a helping

hand, which is exactly what BodyPerfect is designed to offer. Over the next few weeks

I want you to spend time writing things down and thinking issues through. By working through these questions and exercises, you will achieve a long-term approach to healthy eating; helping you to become and stay the person you wish to be. No matter how keen you may be to get started on any food diaries or meal plans, make sure you see your doctor. There is a lot of important information to take on board, and it would probably even be worthwhile reading it through a couple of times to make sure it has all sunk in.

Princess Kathy is a certified nutrition and fitness consultant.Email: [email protected] | http://body4jesus.blogspot.com

FROM THE DESK OF PRINCESS KATHY:Three important keys to healthy eating: VARIETY, WHOLESOMENESS, MODERATION.

• HEALTHY FRUITS

Obesity is an increasingly big culprit. The correlation has been demonstrated in the United States where there is an obesity epidemic. Increased body weight, which adds stress to lower body joints, is a well-established factor in the development of osteoarthritis. The knees carry the brunt of someone’s body weight and are particularly at risk. Likewise, as we see more obesity in Nigeria, we can expect increased incidents of arthritis. Every extra kilogram a person gains, adds 4 kilograms of pressure on the knees and six times the pressure on the hips. Therefore, gaining weight increases the likelihood of developing osteoarthritis later in life.

Other aspects of one’s lifestyle outside diet also play important roles. Athletes and people whose jobs require repetitive impact, such as military personnel and labourers, have a higher risk of developing osteoarthritis. This is due to a cumulative damage on a micro scale which manifests later in life.

Joint alignment can also result in cumulative damage and accelerated wear of the joint. In particular, individuals who have “K legs” are particularly

vulnerable to arthritis. More commonly but yet with less risk “bow legs” create a higher likely hood of joint arthritis later in life than in individuals with straight legs.

Old injuries of the tissue can lead to osteoarthritis later in life. This explains why individuals with neglected injuries such as in sports in their younger years tend to suffer the consequences later in life. Injuries to

the ligaments or cartilage can result in instability or changes in the normal relationship between connecting bones. This creates increased pressure on the cartilage and eventual wear of the joint. For similar reasons, injuries to the bones around a joint can result in long term damage.

Genetics plays a role in the development and progression of osteoarthritis, particularly in the hands. Individuals whose parents have arthritis are more likely to have arthritis. Inherited bone abnormalities can affect joint shape or stability, or can result in cartilage that is more prone to wear.

Muscle weakness, unlike genetics, is a causative factory in arthritis that can be controlled. Studies show that weakness of the muscles surrounding the

knee is associated with osteoarthritis, especially in women and makes the pain and stiffness worse after onset. Strengthening exercises for muscles around a joint are important in reducing the risk or in slowing down the progression of arthritis. A trained physical therapist can be valuable in providing guidance.

By understanding the various causes of joint pain, we can provide solutions to prevent them in people who are at risk. We can also delay the onset of eventual crippling pain in patients who present early. Finally, we can offer surgical solutions to relieve pain in patients who need it. With modern orthopaedic

treatments, old people should not just wither away and accept joint pain as part and parcel of aging. They should seek expert evaluations and precise treatments.

Aging And Joint Pain ProblemDr. Aham Onyike

...CONTINUED FROM LAST WEEK

Dr. Aham Onyike is a U.S. Trained and Board Certified Orthopedic Surgeon, specializing in Joint Replacement of the hip and knee, and Sports Medicine. You can connect with Dr. Onyike through Linked In ‘Dr. Aham Onyike’, email [email protected], and social media @CASSurgery

/ June 26, 201614

June 26, 2016 / 15

PEOPLE“ONE PARTY AT A TIME!”

:08034746487 | 08039675880

By Oscar Ochiogu

By Pamela Echemunor

COintrEau CrEativE CrEw LaunChEs in nigEria

Fadan inauguratEs nEw ExECutivE

Luxury brand, Cointreau recently, launched a global philanthropic programme in Nigeria tagged; the Cointreau Creative Crew. The programme which was originally launched in the UK late last year is aimed at promoting the development of women’s creative freedom and expression as well as encouraging women to work towards taking their initial dream and extending it into a tangible creative reality. Entrepreneurs will be afforded the opportunity to be awarded a grant of € 20,000 to support their creative project.

Betty Irabor, Founder and Publisher of Genevieve Magazine and the Creative Curator of the Cointreau Creative Crew, Nigeria, enlisted a network of seasoned professionals, entrepreneurs and creatives including, Lami Tumaka, Barbara Lawrence, Ituen Bassey, Eku Edewor, Neku Atawodi, Yagazie Emezi, Denrele Sonariwo & Afua Osei. These women form the jury and committee of the Cointreau Creative Crew were unveiled at the campaign launch.

The Fashion Designers Association of Nigeria (FADAN) held its inauguration cockatil party to swear in its newly elected executives after its recently held elections. Mrs Funmi Ajila- Ladipo was elected for a 2nd term in office and will steer the affairs of the association with the new executive for the next 3 years.

The inauguration cocktail, kicked off with red carpet activities at the Nike Arts Gallery in Lekki, Lagos.

While thanking members for the honour dew her, President of FADAN, Mrs. Funmi Ajila-Ladipo said the association would continue to lead the way in keeping fashion alive with trends as well as timeless fashion pieces.

Ijeoma ejIofor & KIKI oKonKwo

nKolIKa oKolI

funmI ajIla- ladIpo

abI KolaKuddus aIsha achonu rufaI ladIpo

bIdemI ZaKarIyau & betty Irabor

denola adepetun

denola adepetun

ZaInab balogun neKu atawodI

eKu edewor Kaylah onIwo bola balogun

bImbo balogun chIKa balogun patrIcIa faleye KoffI

ada nwoKe clara oKoro bomo wanaemI

stella awoh modela

allure 26 june 2016

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