B.

Savalou, ]West

CHRISTIAN MISSIONARY FELLOWSHIP Prayer Newsletter

February 1995

WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF ... ?

We would like to sharea few scenarios with you. This isyour chance to be an armchair missionary. Imagineyourself here, away from wise and respected mentors,friends, colleagues, and professors. Your daily decisions,words, and actionsaffect all areas of your life. In light ofthis, carefully consider the social, cultural, fiscal,anthropological, and theological implications of eachsituation. And, remember, this is real life —not a textbook~ so things are not always what theyappear to be.

#1 - THE SITUATION:

Every day in town, a crowd of women waits at the gasstation to buy kerosene. The trucks of kerosene come lessfrequently than before, therefore, in between timeskerosene{used for lanterns, stoves, and refrigerators) is ingreatdemand. Several women in the village have turnedthe crisis to their advantage (and, thus, the disadvantage oftheir neighbors) by buying50-100 gallons ofkerosene at atime, depleting the supply more quickly. Then, when thekerosene at the station isgone, theyset-up mini-kerosenedispensing stations near their homes, selling it for fourtimes the normal price. Most people in the village aresubsistence farmers and only have the money to buyone-week's worth ofkerosene at a time from the station.

When the next weekcomes and the station is out, they areforced to pay the inflated prices of these makeshiftdispensing stations.

THE PROBLEM:

A friend, who is also the wife of the preferred son of thechiefof the village, comes and asks you to buyher 100gallons ofkerosene at thestation. She has the money butcannot make her way through the mob at thestation tobuy the newly-arrived kerosene. Shesays that you wouldbe served quickly since you are white. You know that sheintends to save the kerosene for a week, then sell it at theinflated price.

What doyou do?

Sub'sabara region ofnorthern Benin —a predominately Muslimregion.

#2 - THE SITUATION:

Weddings in Benin are very expensive for the groombecause he must pay a brideprice. The father of the bridesets the price according to the lifestyle the girl isaccustomed to and the financial standing of the groom.

Tintin, a good friend and promising Christian leader, isengaged to be married to thedaughter of an educatedChristian man. The bride price for her includes fabric(about 70 yards), shoes, jewelry, perfume, towels, lotions,and soaps for the bride herself, plus moneyand additionalfabric (20 yards more) for the parents, grandparents, aunts,and uncles. Tintin has already purchased everything,including a nice suitcase to present it in. With the date forpresentation of the bride price set, the invitations are beingchosen for an Easter wedding.

THE PROBLEM:

Two days ago, the father of the bride decided that an Aprilwedding was too soon, even though both families hadpreviously agreed on that date. He cited the fact that hehas too manyfinancial burdens at the moment and saidthat if $50 (three-months' salary for Tintin) wereadded tothe bride priceby nextweek, he could possibly manage.

Tintin is very discouraged. Aside from not wanting towait, he does not haveany money. He is even in debtbecause he borrowed money to have a bed and table madefor his new home. Also, he hasalready paid out a fullyear's salary for the bride price so far. His bride-to-be hasa job, but she can't help out because she isobligated to giveher father her full paycheck at the end of each month. Itwould takeTintin at least 10 months to come up with themoney.

What doyou do?

#3 ~ THE SITUATION:Anatole, a new Christian from Savalou, is a farmer likemany other residents of Savalou. During planting andharvesting times, he sends his wife to her parents' village to

4

French language school in Burkina Faso that we recently visitedas a possibilityfor future teammates' language learningsite.

live so that she can be closer to his fields and can then

work every day. She takes theirbaby daughter with her.Anatole hasa night job in town, yet he goes to the fieldsoften to help her.

THE PROBLEM:

During the last harvest time, his

worked in Anatole's fields the whole

season. But, when the harvest wascompleted, she never returned toSavalou. Anatole sent letters to the

village, and even paid an additional ^bride price in order to gain the \)||̂ <approval of her parents. He hopedthat theywould use their authorityover her to force her to return toSavalou. Anatole's entire family hadtwo meetings with his wife's family,and, at both meetings, her familypromised that shewould be inSavalou within the week It has and cZrkioithbeen two months since the last

meeting; she still has not returned. literacy -Emmanuel.

Recently, Anatole said that he haddecided to go to the village the nextdayand take back his two-year-olddaughter. His reasoning: bydoingthis, his wife would return toSavalou, also, because she would notwant to beseparated from her child.He wants advice.

What doyou do?

These have been only three ofdozens of such scenarios that haveactually been played ou"t~in our livesthese past few months. Some havebeen resolved and others are still "inprocess." We continue to learnmuch about ourselves, thefascinating people here, and thismysterious business called missions.

We'd love to hear your ideas. Whatwould you do? ... so, feel free todrop us a line about any or all of theaforementioned case studies.

Toriposedas St. Luciaas we celebrated a

Swedish Cbristtnastradition.

PRAYER REQUESTS:• The five CMF interns who plan to spend eight weeks

here this summer.

• Us as we prepare individualized programs to meet theneeds of each intern.

Steve and Shawn AllenChristian Missionary Fellowship

P.O. BOX 501020

INDIANAPOLIS, IN 46250-6020

Address Correction Requested

• Damon and Juli Jones as they raise funds to join theteam in Benin in 1996.

• Smooth renewal of our resident cards and visas in May.• The Savalou Youth Center as it opens in March.• Production of a Fon songbook.

3-- PRAISES:^ 'J.'

" The completion, production, and distribution of^ basic discipleship/doctrine book for new^ Christians in Fon.

i If • Good health.M* Productive meetings and planning sessions withGarry and Linda Brock (CMPAfrica

• An eventful and fun-filled Christmas season.

Growing, learning, and serving in Benin.

La flami ilTe, 3Lf£7KLa Famille Allen —Steve, Shawn, Tori, Clark

Note: Ifyouwould like to use a missions minutesprogram based on Benin for your VBS, please contactShawn Allen by May 1.

Mm Nn

I ^Oo Oo

Clark at school

'jfi '-M.

NonproRi O^nization

U.S. Pottage

Peimii No. 2975

Indianapolis, Indiana

Mission Se-rvicesEditorial DeptP 0 Box £4E7

Knoxville TN 37301-£4£7

B.P. 85

Savalou, BeninWest Africa

CHRISTIAN MISSIONARY FELLOWSHIP Prayer Newsletter

(A True Story)

In 1986, a young man began to attend church. Hewas a new Christian, and the church he attended metin the homes of church members because it, too, wasnew. Over time, the daughter of one of the eldersbegan to take notice of this young man and, througha mediator, she declared to the young man herinterestin him. The young man declined to pursuethe relationship because he had not yet had time toobserve the girl and decide ifshe could be acompatible mate.

Three months passed, and the youngman saw thatthe girl did indeed have the characteristics he wantedin a wife, so he decided to declare his intentions tomarryher. Right before he began to gather thenecessary gifts for her family, he heard that she hadalready accepted to marry another young man. Thus,he waited and began to search out an apprenticeshipso that he could learn to be a solderer. After one

month, the girl approached him and told him she hadbroken offwith the other man because his character

was not what she wanted in a husband. The youngman then talked openly to her of his intentions tomarry her but, although she verbally accepted, theengagementwas not brought before the parentsbecausewithin the month she left to work for a familyteaching at a Bible school in Niger.

The two wrote regularly for three years. Then, all of asudden, her letters came less frequently; the young

man heard that she was again engaged to another. Hecould do nothing but pray. Meanwhile, the girl'sfamily became involved anddemanded thatshe quither job and return home. They could not bear thethought of theirdaughter marrying someone fromanother countryand living so far away. The girlbroke her engagement, quit her job, and returnedhome in 1991.

Afterher return, the youngman saw the girl often atchurch but made no attempt to approach her. Afterseveral months, the girl began to askclose friends andfamily members of the young man to intercede on herbehalf, apologize, and ask the young man for anotherchance in their relationship. Upon hearing this, theyoung man asked the pastorand elders to prayfor hisdecision.

Some time passed, and he felt sure that he wanted tomarry her. So, once again, he approached her todeclare his intentions. In her response, shenot onlysaid '3'̂ ^"but asked for complete forgiveness. She toldthe young man that even though several others hadrecently declared their intentions to marryher, shehad refused them. She had decided not to become

engaged or marry until the youngman had proven, bymarrying someone else, that he wouldn't have her.

Once the young man declared his love to the girl andwas accepted, he then approached the pastorwho gavehim advice on how to proceed. The next step was tonotify the girl's parents. To do this, the young manput money in an envelope, bought four cold Cokes,and went to the girl's home. After talking to theyoung man alone, the father called the girl in andasked her three questions: "Doyou love this man?

Can we accept these giftsfrom him? Willyou everseparatefrom him?"

Upon hearing the proper responses, the fatherbrought his daughter and the young man togetherbefore him, and both parents prayed their blessings onthe couple. This was early in 1992.

The period ofengagement was the time for learningabout one another's character and family. To do this,the couple got together in the midst of familymembers once a week and visited. Having familypresent served a double purpose: the first, tointroduce the chosen mate to the family over-time in acasual manner; and the second, to protect the couplefrom rumors and questions of impropriety.

As the engagement neared the end, the young couplevisited all the area churches in order to announce theirlove for one another. Since it was the obligation ofthe young man to present his bride to be, this iswhathe said, "Finally... God hasgiven me my other half. Ihave the joyofpresenting hertoyou. Pleaseprayfor us aswepreparefor marriage. " This announcementwasseen as a covenant between fellow Christians and the

young couple.

After the announcement, the only thing left to do wasto assemble and present the bride price.

The original bride price list was compiled bythe mother of the bride. It was, of course,very long, so —with the girl as the mediator—the young man and themother-in-law-to-be bartered for several

weeks to come to a final agreement. About80% of the bride price included gifts for thebride herself. It was the groom's way ofvisually cutting the ties between her and herfamily, proving that he could "provide" forhis new wife, thus proving that she belongedto him.

It took over one year for the young man toassemble all the gifts and money for thebride price. When the day finally arrived topresent it, the young man was forbidden bycustom from attending the ceremony.Instead, he was represented by family members andfriends.

The day of the ceremony, the representatives gatheredat the church to collect the gifts. They rode to the

f

The groom'sfamily carries his gifts tothe bride'sparent's home.

girrs home and'stopped 100 meters away. All thegifts were then carried on the women's heads to thefamily's gatewhile everyone sanga welcome in orderto give the girl's family enough notice to makeall thefinal preparations. The songof welcome also calledout to the girl in the name of her fiance.

Upon arrival at the family's compound, the guestswere refused entry until theysanga songof praise tothe girl's family. This was to show the neighborswhat a jewel the girl was; to prove, so to speak, thatshewas earnestly sought after.

Before the guests entered the gate, water was dumpedover the threshold to symbolize the peace and

freshness of the new relationshipforming between the two families.

All the gifts were arranged neatlybefore the grandparents forinspection. When they had. .finished inspectingthem, theaunts, uncles, cousins, and siblingsalso examined the gifts. This wasdone by the extendedfamilybecause the parents had alreadyaccepted the offerof marriage.Now it was in the hands of the

elders of the family to give theirfinal approval.

All throughout the ceremony, the-r, , , j j women representing the youngI he bride s extended n i u r i

family inspects the ^an talked to the girl s familygfis. through song. They began by

asking the girl's family to sayallthat was on their hearts, then they continuouslypraised the girl's family. When the gifts were finally

examined, the women sang their appreciation for afavorable response.

The young man's mother and sistersat at the doorduring the evening, wiping each person's feet as he orshe entered. This showed the humilityof the familyin asking for the girl and was a sign ofwelcoming thegirl into their family. Also, the young man's motherdiscreetly cleared the yard of all the rocksand laid outcloth in anticipation of the girl's entry to view the

were sent out in her A this the bride or another?

place to which thewomen respondedin song, "No, sendthe other; this oneis not quality; she'snot the choice."

Finally, the girl enteredwalking on the carefully-placed fabric and dressed in new clothes she hadbought for herself. She entered and left three times,each time appearing in another new outfit as sheexamined the gifts.

When she had examined all the gifts, her father askedher three questions again: "Do you love him? Do youaccept these gifts? Can we accept these gifts?" After threeyeses, the women began to praise her in song. Thenthe father gave her his final counsel: to obey herhusband and to not bring shame to her family. Heprayed his blessing on her and released her to bemarried. The evening ended with a celebrationdinner.

Is this the bride or another?

Two weeks later, the young man and the girl werejoined by the State in a civil ceremony, and three daysafter that the marriage ceremonywas held at the

church. For the young couple, the church ceremonyheld the most significance.

As theyeach entered the church, the choir sangblessings for them. When theywere both finally upfront, thewhole congregation sang a welcome. Aftera sermonon biblical marriage and a time of blessingfrom the pastor, the congregation and the choir sangwhile guests came forward to present their gifts to thecouple and greet them. The evening ended withphotos and a dinner reception at the girl's home.

After the reception, the young man left for severalhours while the girl stayed with her family to say herfinal goodbyes. Near midnight, thewomen of thegirl's family brought the young man to his new wife.

We would like to present to you TinTin and HelenWeke, married May 27, 1995. Please pray for them asthey lead young couples in the church. Pray for theirmarriage as you would pray for any other marriage.

growth. She is a new Christian, and he has histhoughts toward the ministry.

Finally, praise God for ourmarriage. In September,we will celebrate eight years ofmarriage, andwe bothknow thatwithout theother we are incomplete!Rejoice with us in our love!

Thanks for your time andyour support.

Love in Jesus,

The Aliens in Benin

P.S. If you would like a summary ofourpast year,please-€ontaetT4aomi Kouns, Ghristian-MissiGnaryFellowship, P.O. Box 501020, Indianapolis, IN46250-6020; 317-578-2700.

6/95

Steve and Shawn Allen

Christian Missionary FellowshipP.O. BOX 501020

INDIANAPOLIS. IN 46250-6020

Address Correction Requested

Mission ServicesEditorial DeptP • E^ox £427Knoxville TN 37901-£4ii;/

Due to a printer's error,we sent this corrected copy

Nonprofit OtpaiauoaU.S.Pottage

PAID

Permit No. 2975

Indianapolis, Indiana

Steve & Shawn

ALLEN

B.P. 85

Savalou, BeninWest Africa

CHRISTIAN MISSIONARY FELLOWSHIP Prayer Newsletter

November 1995

TEAM

We could define team in many ways, depending onthe typeof work being done and the type of peopledoing it. Teams that come to mind are sports teams,worship teams, medical teams, and research teams.Obviously, these teams would function verydifferently from one another and would requirevarying levels of skills and commitments from theirmembers. So it is with missions; there are teams ofmissionaries all over the world from the bush to thebooming cities, from middle class neighborhoods tomountainside subsistence farms. People from verydiverse backgrounds, possessing different skills, areteaming up to touch the world with love.

CMF is highly committed to teams as well. EveryCMF team around the world has a different "face."Their strengths and weaknesses vary as well as themethods they use to accomplish the goal, but eachteam is as important as the next.

In our first four years overseas, we have experiencedlife on two very different teams and even life withouta team. We've learned a lot about what team can beand about working on a team. We'd like to share abit of that with you.

TEAM can be anycombination of the following:

• Family ~ sharing special occasions (birthdays,holidays, milestones), sorrows, and day-to-dayhappenings.

• Encouragement -- praising, approving, cheering oneanother on.

Tori and Clark accompany summer interns, MelanieandAmy,on a bike througha coffee plantation in a Togo rainforest.

Tori in church: She's greatat makingfriends and keeping theyoungchildrenhappy.

• Accountability —overseeing finances, timemanagement, and decision making.

• Church ~ giving guidance and support in prayer,spiritual growth, and worship.

• Business —planning strategy, setting goals, checkingprogress, and evaluating failures.

• School —researching new ideas, sharinginformation, asking questions, and forminghypotheses.

• Marriage -- sharing honestly, feeling safe, correcting,and respecting

• Mission —serving, loving, searching for deeperunderstanding and, thus, clearer communication.

• Friendship ~ laughing, playing, relaxing together.

We've experienced teams with a surplus in several ofthese areas, as well as deficits in other areas. We havelearned in which areas we are most comfortable and inwhich areas we most need to work. We left for thefield thinking that "team" meant basically all of theabove, but we now realize that being human makesthat impossible without a lot of work.

We share this to let you know where we are right

We haveweathered culture shock and languagelearning. We have made some really neat friends.Three churches have been born and are growing!Within those churches there are choirs, women's

Shawn bargainsat the market.

groups, youth activities, a drama group, discipleshiptraining, prayer meetings, and Bible studies. We arethrilled by how God has worked, and excited aboutthe possibilities for the future. But, we are tired. Atpresent, we are the only CMF family in Benin. Weare thankful that missionary recruits Damon andJuliJones are raising support to join our team. We believea healthy team for Benin would have four missionaryfamilies. Will you pray with us about this need?

Ask God:

1. If He would have^fw join us.2. If there is anyone you know who should be part ofthis team. If so, talkwith that person, send theirname to CMF, and pray for them.3. To raise up a team to work in West Africa.

Praise God for the stamina He's given us to completefour challenging years overseas and for the peace He'sgiven us about the future!

Thank you for your love, support, and prayers.

Walking in Faith ... one step at a time.

Amytaught an English class at the Savalou Youth Center.

yijc, skLa Famille Allen in Benin!

Steve and Shawn Allen

Christian Missionary FellowshipP.O. BOX 501020

INDIANAPOLIS, IN 46250-6020

Address Correction Requested

Melanie helped witha VBS. We had 80 children and lotsoffun!

Mission ServicesEditorial DeptP 0 Box £427Knoxville TM 37901.~£4£7

NonproGi Ot(;aniuiion

U.S.Poiligc

Pertnii No. 2975

Indianapolu,Indiana