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TRANSCRIPT
Aladdin 2016
(or “Tales of Five Arabian Nights and Three Matinees”)
AN ORIGINAL PANTOMIME (OH YES IT IS!)
WRITTEN & DIRECTED BY GRAHAM LLOYD & DICK CHALKLEY
© Lloyd & Chalkley 2015/16
A Work In Progress Production
WHAT THE PAPERS SAY …
“Really made me squeak” – Hamster & Furry Rodent
Weekly
“One of the scripts I have read …” – Guardian
“Jolly good! – Bunty
“To manny speeling misteakes. See me!” –
Dumbledore
“Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day …
CERTAINLY NOT! – William Shakespeare
Aladdin
Page 2
Act One: Prologue – Abanazar’s Lair ...................................................................................................................... 1
Act One: Scene 1 - The Market in Old Peking ......................................................................................................... 3
SONG: “Old Peking” (to the tune of Waterloo) - Ensemble ............................................................................... 3
SONG: “Man, I Feel Like A Woman” – Twankey,Female Ensemble,Senior Dancers .......................................... 6
Act One: Scene 2 – A street somewhere in Old Peking .......................................................................................... 9
Song: “The Bold Gendarmes” – Chop, Chop, Na-Na, Male Ensemble ............................................................. 10
Act One: Scene 3 – Inside Twankey’s Laundry ...................................................................................................... 11
SONG: “9-5” – Twankey, Chi-Ki, Female Ensemble .......................................................................................... 13
Act One: Scene 4 - The Palace Garden ................................................................................................................. 14
DANCE: “Kung Fu Fighting” – Senior Dancers .................................................................................................. 14
SONG/DANCE: “China In Your Hands” – Young Dancers .................................................................................. 15
SONG: “Whole New World” - Aladdin and Jasmine ......................................................................................... 18
Act One: Scene 5 -The Market Place in Old Peking .............................................................................................. 19
SONG – “Making Your Mind Up” - Twankey, Chi-Ki, Aladdin, Wishee & Abanazar ......................................... 23
Act One: Scene 6 – Outside the Magic Cave ......................................................................................................... 25
Act One: Scene 7 - Inside the cave (UV Scene) ..................................................................................................... 28
SONG: You ain’t never had a friend like me - Genie and Senior Dancers ........................................................ 30
SONG: GOLD – Aladdin, Genie, Ensemble ........................................................................................................ 32
Act Two: Scene 1 - The Throne Room of the Palace (in China)............................................................................. 33
SONG: “Make ‘em laugh” – Ensemble/Chi-Ki/Vizier/Empress ......................................................................... 33
SONG: “Price Tag” – Aladdin/Jasmine/Ensemble............................................................................................. 37
SONG: Short reprise of Whole New World – Aladdin & Jasmine ..................................................................... 37
Act Two: Scene 2 - Another Street in Old Peking.................................................................................................. 38
Act Two: Scene 3 - Abanazars Palace in Egypt ...................................................................................................... 45
SONG: “Old Bazaar in Cairo” – Abanazar/Ensemble/Slave Girls Dance. .......................................................... 45
Act Two: Scene 4 - The Egyptian Desert …. .......................................................................................................... 47
SONG: Mummy, Mummy, Mummy! – Twankey, Wishee, Aladdin, Chi-Ki, Li-Chi ............................................ 48
Act Two: Scene 5 - Abanazars Lair ........................................................................................................................ 50
SONG: Don’t Stop me Now - Aladdin, Jasmine, Twankey, Wishee, Chi-Ki, Empress, Chop Chop, Na-Na ........ 54
AUDIENCE SONG: 500 Miles – Twankey, Wishee, Li-Chi & Audience .............................................................. 57
SONG: “Old Peking” Reprise For walkdown - All .............................................................................................. 58
SONG: Footloose! - All ............................................................................................................................... 58
Aladdin
Page 3
CAST (IN ORDER OF CASH HANDED OVER TO THE SCRIPTWRITERS):
ABANAZAR (M) An evil, scheming villain (Boo!)
SLAVE OF THE RING (F) Captured by Abanazar – hates working for him. (SFTD)
VIZIER (M) Bossy and officious. Elderly and with a severe allergy problem
CHOP CHOP (M/F) Tall Police person (part of comedy duo)
NA NA (M/F) Small Police person (part of comedy duo)
ALADDIN (M/F) Twankeys son. Cheeky “diamond in the rough”
CHI-KI (F) Jasmine’s handmaiden …. Likes Wishee … a lot!
Li-Chi (M/F) Wishee’s pet “Peking Duck”
WISHEE WASHEE (M) Twankeys other son. Links to audience. Falls asleep a lot
WIDOW TWANKEY (M). Comedy dame. Outrageous, saucy and flamboyant
JASMINE (F) Beautiful naïve Princess with a “tough” edge
EMPRESS (F) Jasmines mother. Very protective
GENIE OF THE LAMP (M) Wisecracking genie
EXECUTIONER (M/F) Non speaking part
ENSEMBLE Peking peasants; Palace Courtiers; Policemen; Laundry Women; Jewels;
Mummies
Aladdin
Page 1
Act One: Prologue – Outside Abanazar’s Lair
(Front of curtains. After a blackout, a loud crash of thunder and pyro flash … perhaps haze or dry ice
flood the stage … before a single spotlight picks out Abanazar who wears a very flamboyant ring and
is holding a large and ancient book…)
ABABAZAR: (Cackles evilly) Ugh! What do we have here? Smelly children getting their sticky little fingers all over the seats? Drat. Small children have a nasty habit of ruining evil plans … so you can all go and take a jump into a bowl of lumpy custard! Shoo! Go on! Buzz off! (Audience boo). “Boo”? Is that the best you can do? Well … boo to you too! (Audience boo). Listen! I am the Great Abanazar … the Nastiest Necromancer on the Nile … more villainous than Voldemort … sexier than [well known hearththrob] … and I love being booed! (Evil laugh. Audience boo loudly!). Excellent! Now … shut yer gobs and settle down. I’ve got a big speech to make …
For years I have travelled to the four corners of the world seeking a magic lamp which will bring untold wealth and power. I have braved storms, fought with demons, crossed deserts and seen sights you would not believe. I have been to some truly terrible places … the worst of which is St Ives. Here – I hit rock bottom. But I found this (shows the ring) in the gutter outside Floods Tavern, and this (shows the book) in Ye Olde Norris Museum … (Reads from book … mysterious music plays)
“From ancient times a hidden cave holds wonders to behold Jewels and rings, exquisite things, of silver and of gold But most of all, a magic lamp that brings you everything Is waiting to be found by you … just outside …” (turns the page) … Pidley?
(Music stops abruptly)
No – that can’t be right? Nothing of value ever came from Pidley? (looks at ring). Well … apart from the B1040! Perhaps this mysterious ring can help … (rubs ring)
(Pyro and Slave of the Ring appears in her own spotlight)
Blimey … it’s [well known beauty]
SLAVE: No – I am the Slave of the Ring
ABANAZAR: (the following dialogue should be delivered in rhyme.) This welcome news makes my heart sing, for I’ve a job for you
SLAVE: You do?
ABANAZAR: I do! Yes yes … I do!
SLAVE: Then speak away old thing
ABANAZAR: Do you know where lies a lamp, imbued with mystic power?
SLAVE: I do – but I lost the map whilst taking a hot shower
ABANAZAR: Curses! I was so close! But can you help my seeking?
Aladdin
Page 2
SLAVE: Not personally – but there is a boy – he lives in old Peking
ABANAZAR: He has the lamp?
SLAVE: ‘Fraid not old bean. The lamp lies far away .. But this young boy has the wits to guide you on your way His mother guards him, his brother too Which seems to be fair enough For he is cheeky, witty too A diamond in the rough
ABANAZAR: His name, oh slave, you must tell You’re here to do my bidding
SLAVE: Ooh get you … bossy boots … his name is A-lad-ding …
ABANAZAR: (stops rhyming) Aladding?
SLAVE: Well – no – it’s actually Aladdin, but that didn’t quite rhyme
ABANAZAR: Hmmmm … Aladdin eh? In old Peking? Can you fly me there?
SLAVE: No – I’m a Slave – not a Genie. I think EasyJet fly to Peking?
ABANAZAR: They do?
SLAVE: Well – I think you actually land in Turkey – that’s the closest you’ll get on your budget …
ABANAZAR: Very well … hypnotise the audience so that they’ll sleep for a month or two … when they wake up … I’ll be in Peking … I’ll trick Aladdin into getting me the lamp … then I’ll be just one step away from ruling the world! (Evil cackle, thunderclaps)
[Either the spotlight fades to black – or possibly a “magical” disappearance – either way, Abanazar exits leaving the Slave alone] SLAVE: (to audience) Please don’t think badly of me. I have no choice but to help my
Master. I’m going to have to hypnotise you now … but don’t worry … it won’t hurt … and when you wake up you’ll be in Peking just before Abanazar arrives. Remember to boo and hiss him every time you see him. OK? Right … now to hypnotise you all. Everybody needs to close their eyes and cover them with their hands … no peeping! Sleepy dreams … now don’t be scared …
Close your eyes – don’t go to sleep, just listen to my vocal … The effect will seem just like a long night down your local … Abanazar knows no good … he really is a bad ‘un (pronounced “baddin”) When you awake … you can join … this adventure with Aladdin … Aladdin … Aladdin … Aladdin … (As she continues, the spotlight fades on her so the stage is in total darkness and she can make her exit. The curtain is then lit with a swirling mysterious light effect as she continues speaking .. slowly fading away …)
Aladdin
Page 3
Act One: Scene 1 - The Market in Old Peking
(Very bright and colourful. Some of the shops have “pun” names … such as “Tes-Co”; “As-Da”; “Co-
Hop”; “Mori-San”; “Cos-Ta” etc plus of course “Twankey’s Laundry”)
SONG: “Old Peking” (to the tune of Waterloo) - Ensemble
CHI-KI (Enters quickly clutching an item of clothing in a paper bag – sees Wishee asleep and blocking entrance to laundry) Wishee! Wake up! I need to get these harem pants washed quickly! The princess needs them for her Royal walkabout. Wishee! (he stays asleep. She takes them out of the bag, drops them on the floor, blows into the bag, bangs it and wakes Wishee up).
WISHEE Wow! What was that! Oh hello Chi-Ki.
Chi-Ki Hello Wishee. You’d fallen asleep again and I was trying to wake you up
WISHEE Well – you did that alright – my ears are still ringing (takes off his hat – SFX Bells ringing). Mind you – it’s a good job you did wake me up! If Ma sees me napping – I’m in for a slapping! You see – I’ve got this snoozing sickness. I fall asleep at the drop of a hat (he drops his hat on the floor and falls asleep)
CHI-KI WISHEE! (she shakes him awake)
WISHEE Did I do it again?
CHI-KI Yes! (she wanders off …)
WISHEE (To audience). Oh hello everybody … I didn’t see you lot there! I suppose I’d better introduce myself. I’m Wishee Washee, and me and my brother, Aladdin, work for my Mum, Widow Twankey, in her laundry. Here … can I let you into a little secret? You see Chi-Ki over there? (on hearing her name she looks over, giggles coyly and waves at him) Guess what? I think she fancies me! (audience react). No – she fancies me more than that! (bigger response from audience). That’s better! The trouble is – she keeps on catching me falling asleep. Here – I’ve got an idea. Why don’t you help me? If you see me falling asleep – will you all shout “WAKEY WAKEY WISHEE WASHEE!” as loud as you can?
AUDIENCE Yes!
WISHEE Thanks! ‘Cos if me ma sees me snoozin’ – I’m in for a brusin’! (He yawns and falls asleep)
AUDIENCE Wakey Wakey Wishee Washee! (He stays asleep)
CHI KI Well – that wasn’t loud enough! You’ll have to try it again! Ready … 1 … 2… 3 …
AUDIENCE Wakey Wakey Wishee Washee!
WISHEE (wakes). Oh – thanks everyone. I was just dreaming about Princess Jasmine
CHI-KI Oh – so I’m not good enough for you, am I?
Aladdin
Page 4
WISHEE No (she glowers at him). Erm – I mean yes! You’re much prettier than the Princess
CHI-KI How do you know? You’ve never seen her. No commoner is allowed to gaze at the Princess, except me of course
ALADDIN (Enters, speaking to Ensemble) Good morning everyone!
ENSEMBLE Good morning, here’s trouble. What’s he up to now etc.
ENSEMBLE 1 What mischief have you been getting up to this morning?
ALADDIN Me, mischief?
ENSEMBLE 2 Yes you, you’re always playing jokes on people, and causing trouble.
Aladdin No not me, I’ m going to be a good lad from now on. (Picking up harem pants from floor and holding them up). Ooh! These will never fit you Wishee!
CHI-KI Aladdin! (snatches them off Aladdin) These are mine!
ALADDIN They won’t fit you either!
CHI-KI Cheek! I mean they’re the Princesses!
ALADDIN Princess Jasmine?
Chi-Ki Yes – she needs them urgently for the Royal Parade!
ALADDIN Princess Jasmine is coming here??
[SFX: Fanfare as Vizier enters]
GUARD Make way for the Royal Vizier!
ENSEMBLE (General hubbub)
VIZIER As Grand Vizier and Chief Bottle Washer to the Empress of China, I hereby decree that the streets must be cleared!
ENSEMBLE (Protesting … “Why?”; “What’s happening?”; “But it’s market day”; etc)
VIZIER SILENCE! Later today, the Empress and her daughter, Princess Jasmine will pass this way ….
ENSEMBLE Oooooooh!
VIZIER As such, bolts must be bolted, shutters must be shutted and eyelids must be … erm … close-ed. No-one may cast eyes upon the Royal Princess … on pain of death or even worse
ENSEMBLE 1 What can be worse than death?
VIZIER You’ll be made to watch endless repeats of [boring tv program]
Aladdin
Page 5
ENSEMBLE “Oooh”; “He’s right”; “That’s so cruel”; “Death would be better” etc
VIZIER Now – I need to speak to the Peking Police Force?
ENSEMBLE 2 Call for the Peking Police!
ENSEMBLE 3 (Calling offstage) Call for the Peking Police!
(Starting off stage we hear “Ne naw” sounds before the Police enter with blue lights on their helmets flashing. They run around in circles and then collide with each other, ending up in a heap stage centre near the Vizier. Chop Chop has a notepad and pen and Na-Na has a magnifying glass which she uses to examine the Vizier from the feet up. When she gets to the face … she screams)
CHOP CHOP (To Vizier) And what were you doing last night?
VIZIER Breathing … which is more than you two’ll be in a minute!
NA-NA Why so … O’ Venerable Vizier?
VIZIER The Royal Party will pass this way later today. I will need these streets completely cleared. Get it?
CHOP CHOP/NA-NA Got it!
VIZIER Good. I’ll be back to check on progress later. Ooh, I feel a sneeze coming on … a … a… a… (he exits and we hear an enormous sneeze … “a-choo” from off stage. We hear people offstage complaining and the Vizier apologising)
CHOP CHOP Evening all! I am Sergeant Chop Chop of the Peking Police
NA-NA I am Sergeant Chop Chop of the Peking Police
CHOP CHOP (whacks him) Idiot! I’m Chop Chop … you’re Na-Na (to audience) She’s called that because she’s a right nana!
NA-NA (sulky) I’m not a banana
CHOP CHOP We seek them here, we seek them there …
NA-NA Wah! It’s not fair – I haven’t properly introduced myself yet!
CHOP CHOP Go on then ... tell them why you’re called Na-Na
NA-NA Yippee! (Turns his helmet blue light on and runs around the stage waving his truncheon and imitating a police siren) Na na, na na, na na
CHOP CHOP/NA-NA We seek them here, we seek them there We seek those baddies everywhere!
NA-NA Yes – we’re always seeking here in Peking!
CHOP CHOP (To crowd). You heard the Vizier. You’ll all have to clear the streets later today
Aladdin
Page 6
NA NA Yes … and we’ll be back later to check that you have cleared off
(They exit making “Ne Naw” noises)
ALADDIN (dreamily) Princess Jasmine. Coming here …
CHI-KI Aladdin! You know the law. If you so much as peek at the Princess you could lose your head
ALADDIN I don’t care … I’ve already lost my heart …
WISHEE Don’t say we didn’t warn you …
TWANKEY (offstage) Wishee! Aladdin! Where are you two layabouts?
ALADDIN It’s Mum! I’m off (he exits)
WISHEE It’s Mum! I’m off! (he exits)
CHI-KI It’s Widow Twankey! I’m off (she exits)
(We hear the guitar intro as the laundry door bursts open …)
TWANKEY # Let’s go girls!
SONG: “Man, I Feel Like A Woman” - Twankey/Female Ensemble/Senior Dancers
(Twankey is joined on stage by dancers and female ENSEMBLE for vocal support and a fabulous dance routine which involves her getting loaded up with dirty clothes ... which she promptly dumps on the floor at the end of the routine!)
TWANKEY (notices audience) Oh hello my little chop sueys! Let me introduce myself! I am Widow Twankey and I run this Garment Cleaning Establishment - that’s a laundry to you lot! Yes, Kimono’s cleaned, saris starched, frocks fumigated and knickers … nicified! It’s a dirty old business and there’s not a lot of money in it, but you know what they say … ‘grime doesn’t pay’!
Now as I’ve said, I am a widow (ah’s etc) and I just wonder if there is a young, good looking wealthy man here that I might take a fancy to. (calling up to lighting team) Could we have the house lights up a little please, now let me have a look at you. (has a good look at audience) Oh dear, Oh dear (to lighting team) no turn them down again quick!
It’s been hard for me since my husband passed away. Mind you … when he was alive he was hardly ever here. You see he was a shift worker. Whenever there was any work to be done … he shifted! He met his death by falling into a vat of granulated coffee. It was a terrible way to go … but at least it was instant. When we got married he told me life would be like a fairy tale. He was right, it was Grimm!
But I’ve got my two sons. There’s Aladdin, he’s a good lad but a bit cheeky … and then there’s Wishee. He tries to give me a hand in the laundry but he’d rather sleep than work. He used to have a job at B & Q but he got the sack for hitting a customer.
Aladdin
Page 7
Well - it wasn’t actually his fault. This man came into the store and said he wanted decking!
Before that he had a job in a yogurt factory. Until one day he drank 14 pints of low fat yoghurt and got completely mullered! Now – where is that boy? Wishee!
WISHEE (enters) What is it now?
TWANKEY Ah! There you are, give us a hand (Wishee applauds) No you idiot, take all this dirty washing into the laundry for me (Wishee starts picking the washing up and throws it unceremoniously through the laundry door). I tell you if brains were a disease he’d be healthy. You know … we’re so busy, I’ve got a little behind …
WISHEE Your behind’s not that little Mum!
TWANKEY Oy! Now where’s that Aladdin when you need him?
ALADDIN (enters grinning soppily from ear to ear) Did someone mention my name?
TWANKEY Yes I did … and why have you got that stupid grin on your face?
ALADDIN No reason Mum
TWANKEY You’re up to something, I can tell. Now spill the beans.
WISHEE You haven’t been climbing the walls of the palace?
ALADDIN Maybe just for a quick peek into the garden.
WISHEE You mean hoping for a quick peek of Princess Jasmine!
TWANKEY One day the Peking Police will catch you and then you’ll be in trouble
ALADDIN Not that idiotic pair!
TWANKEY Well, if they do you’ll be for the chop!
ALADDIN It’ll be worth it Mum, just to get a glimpse of the Princess Jasmine.
WISHEE Yuk!! He’s got it bad
ALADDIN (sighing) I know but believe me she is the most beautiful girl in Peking
WISHEE Maybe she is but you’ll never stand a chance with her. We’re just sons of a lowly old washerwoman.
TWANKEY (clips Wishee’s ear) Not so much of the old. (she exits into Laundry)
WISHEE Ouch, that hurt. (Goes up to laundry door and sits)
SFX: Police sirens heard as Chop Chop and Na-na enter, Aladdin rushes off).
CHOP CHOP Clear the square! (The ENSEMBLE begin to leave)
Aladdin
Page 8
NA-NA Clear the square!
CHOP CHOP The Royal Party are coming!
NA-NA The Royal Party are coming!
CHOP CHOP Leave the area immediately!
NA-NA Leave the area immediately!
CHOP CHOP (Looks l and r) You know what I think?
NA-NA No – what do you think?
CHOP CHOP There’s somebody here
(They’ve spotted Wishee asleep outside the laundry. He has fallen asleep. They creep up on him and prod him with their truncheons)
NA-NA He’s not moving? How can we wake him up?
AUDIENCE Wake up Wishee Washee!
WISHEE (waking) Thanks everyone!! Leave it out mush!
CHOP CHOP Don’t call us “Mush”.
NA-NA (To Wishee) Yeah. The Royal Party will be here soon. So clear off!
WISHEE (Yawns) All right! Keep your hair on (Still yawning he enters the Laundry)
CHOP CHOP (Looking at audience) Shouldn’t you all have left?
NA-NA Yes – you know the law. Anyone caught having a butchers at the Royal Party gets schecked …
CHOP CHOP Schecked?
NA-NA Yeah – you know … (makes a chopping gesture across his neck) SCHECK!
CHOP CHOP So come on. Pack up your things. Off you go
(They exit separately into the audience and encourage them to leave – “Come on – get your coats on”; Hurry up now, nothing to see here”; “what do you mean, you’ve bought a ticket?”etc. At some point ….)
Aladdin
Page 9
Act One: Scene 2 – A street somewhere in Old Peking
(As Scene One ends with the Police moving into the audience, the front curtains close and the VIZIER
enters ….)
VIZIER A … a …. A… CHOO! (he sneezes into a huge hanky … when he opens it we see that he has blown a massive hole right through it!) Oh dear … (He puts the hanky back into his pocket) Now where are those policemen? I need to check that everything is in place for the royal visit this afternoon. I have to admit I am a little concerned about their competence. (CHOP CHOP and NA-NA enter) Ah gentlemen!
NA-NA Where?
CHOP CHOP He means us you fool (He hits NA-NA with his truncheon)
NA-NA Ow!
VIZIER Now tell me, is everything in place for the Royal visit?
CHOP CHOP/NA-NA Yes sir! Street is cleared and ready.
VIZIER Good. I understand that a commoner was seen climbing the Palace wall earlier. Did you see anything?
NA-NA No sir … and I would have seen them because I went to the opticians yesterday for an eye test, and he told me I was colour blind.
VIZIER Well didn’t you know that already?
NA-NA No, it was complete bolt out of the orange.
VIZIER Now I want you to understand that the Princess must be protected at times and I need to know that you are up to the job.
CHOP CHOP Oh we’re up for it sir.
VIZIER I hope so, but first I need to check out your credentials
NA-NA Do what? (hands covering private parts)
VIZIER I mean I’ll give you a little test, banana brain. Right, if you have 8 apples in one hand and 9 in the other hand, what have you got.
NA-NA Blooming big hands
VIZIER Hmm … What do you know about Damascus?
CHOP CHOP It kills ninety nine per cent of all known germs
VIZIER Who was born in a stable and had millions of followers?
NA-NA Red Rum
Aladdin
Page 10
VIZIER (exasperated) Tell me, how do you two say so many stupid things in a day?
CHOP CHOP/NA-NA We get up early!
VIZIER Well I don’t know. If this is the best the police force has to offer I suppose I’m stuck with it … but I warn you if anything goes wrong you will be for the chop. Do I make myself clear?
CHOP CHOP Very clear sir
NA-NA Yes, very clear sir.
VIZIER Good, on with your business then (Vizier exits)
Song: “The Bold Gendarmes” – ChopChop, Na-Na, Male Ensemble
Aladdin
Page 11
Act One: Scene 3 – Inside Twankey’s Laundry
(Wishee is inside the laundry, ironing. A large pile of “washing” is upstage. Wishee yawns and rests
his head on the ironing board … asleep!)
AUDIENCE Wakey, wakey, Wishee Washee!
WISHEE (wakes) Oh – thanks boys and girls … I always find that ironing leaves me a little “flat”! Here … do you wanna know a secret?
AUDIENCE Yes!
WISHEE OK … but promise not to tell anyone? ‘Specially not Mum! Yeah?
AUDIENCE Yes!
WISHEE Well … Mum sent me to the market this morning to get some more washing powder, and I went into Pets ‘R’ Us and found this lovely ….
TWANKEY (offstage) Wishee!
WISHEE Oh crikey – here she comes now!
TWANKEY Ah good – you’re back. Did you get the washing powder?
WISHEE Yes ….
TWANKEY And?
WIDSHEE And what?
TWANKEY Did you swap the magic beans like I asked you?
WISHEE Yes
TWANKEY And not for something silly like your cousin Jack?
WISHEE No mum – you’ve got the wrong panto – this isn’t Jack and the Beanstalk … it’s Aladdin!! I didn’t get you a cow! But I did get something else!
TWANKEY Ooooh. Lovely! What is it?
WISHEE Close your eyes- don’t peep! (She does) (To audience) This is the secret I was gonna tell you about! (He goes to the pile of “washing” and reveals Li-Chi!). (To audience) Shhhh … don’t say anything!
(Li-Chi walks down to Twankey and pecks her bottom and then runs and hides)
TWANKEY Ouch! What did you do that for?
WISHEE That wasn’t me!
Aladdin
Page 12
TWANKEY Well who was it then? (To audience) Was it Wishee? (Audience “no”) Are you sure? (Audience “yes”). Well – who was it then?
(Li-Chi returns and pecks her bottom again- this time with a loud QUACK and then runs back to Wishee
TWANKEY Arrrgh! What is that thing!
WISHEE This is my new pet Mum … meet Li-Chi … she’s my Peking Duck!
(Li-Chi pecks her again)
TWANKEY More like a Pecking Duck! (Li-Chi pecks her again) Gerroff! You daft duck! Just wait till I get my hands on you. I’ll pluck your feathers and make a pillow!
WISHEE Don’t be rotten mum. She didn’t mean anything
TWANKEY You’re as daft as that duck …. And look at my washing ... duck down!
WISHEE (ducks down and looks up) What is it?
TWANKEY There’s feather’s everywhere … you’re moulting (Li Chi pecks her). Fool! I said moulting – not revolting!
WISHEE Ah Mum – come on – be nice …. She’s very shy really … come on Li-Chi – say hello to the boys and girls (Li chi hides behind Wishee)
TWANKEY She is shy!
WISHEE If you all say hello – I’m sure she’ll come out of her feathers. Do you know how ducks say hello? No? Well – I’ll tell you. They go (he waggles his bottom) like this. Come on ….. up you get we’ll all say “hello” to Li Chi. Yes – mums and dads as well. Ready? (He encourages audience until Li Chi charges around the stage happily quacking!)
TWANKEY Stop messing about! Go and get the washing line and I’ll start sorting some of these clothes …
(Wishee exits and returns holding one end of a full washing line which he walks across stage, exiting on the opposite side. The line continues to be pulled across by a stage hand until Wishee eventually enters from the same side that he began … with the end of the washing line in his hand! Li Chi generally gets in the way and pecks at Twankey)
TWANKEY (As the line is moving across, she picks up a large pair of red pants from the pile on the floor which are trimmed with ermine.) You‘d think these were suitable for Father Christmas, wouldn’t you? Well, they’re not. He doesn’t wear underpants. That’s why he’s called Saint Nickerless!
WISHEE Nearly there Mum!
(He trips and falls as the line gets fully pulled off the stage)
WISHEE I’ll give you a hand to sort out the washing Mum …
Aladdin
Page 13
TWANKEY Well – be careful – we do have some celebrity washing in … (As she identifies them – she hands them to Wishee who throws them into the washing machine). Simon Cowells trousers (high waistband) … Ronnie Corbetts golf slacks (tiny) …. Anne Widdecombes bra (huge) … Peter Crouch’s socks (very long ones) … (local politician’s?) suit (clown outfit) … [and anymore!]
(As the last item goes into the washing machine … Li Chi nudges Wishee who falls into the washing machine and then Twankey slams the door shut)
TWANKEY Now – where’s that lazy boy got too? Bet he’s skived off for a kip!
(She turns the machine on. We see Wishees face (graphic) spinning around amongst the suds through the glass front of the washing machine) Have you seen him? What do you mean he’s in the washing machine? Oh no he isn’t! (Oh yes he is! etc. She turns and sees the face and screams! She turns the machine off and opens the door. Mini Wishee - covered in foam - runs out of the machine and runs around the stage yelling)
TWANKEY Oh no! My little Wishee! What am I going to do? (Li Chi nudges her towards the mangle) Oh … good idea Li Chi. (She puts mini Wishee into mangle- a large flat Wishee cut out comes out of other side as she turns the handle. )
TWANKEY Oh my goodness! He’s so thin! What can I do to plump him up again? (Li Chi points to the tumble dryer). Good thinking! Turn it up to “Maximum” – that should do the trick!(She puts the cut out into the tumble dryer, turns it up to “MAX” [new graphic of a hot Wishee appears in the door]. Smoke starts to come out of dryer, loud machine noises, eventually a big pyro flash and full size Wishee comes out of the machine with dirty clothes and a sooty face)
WISHEE Aw mum! Just look at me! I’m all dirty now!
TWANKEY Yes you are!
(Chi-Ki and Ensemble enter carrying washing– they heard the explosion)
ENSEMBLE What happened? What was that noise? Are you OK? Etc
CHI-KI Oh my goodness! The Princess’s pants! Will they be ready in time?
TWANKEY Only if you lot will help me …
ENSEMBLE Of course we will! What do you need? Tell me what to do etc
TWANKEY Well, normally I only work 9 to 5 … but in this case …
SONG: “9-5” – Twankey, Chi-Ki, Female Ensemble
Aladdin
Page 14
Act One: Scene 4 - The Palace Garden
(Half stage … willow pattern type scenery)
DANCE: “Kung Fu Fighting” – Senior Dancers
(At end of song Empress enters and dancers prostrate themselves)
EMPRESS (Beckoning offstage). Come my dear. Take the air. The palace gardens are almost at their best …
(Jasmine enters with Chi-Ki)
JASMINE Mummy … we can hardly stroll about with everyone lying on the ground …
EMPRESS Indeed, indeed. (calls off) Grand Vizier!
(Vizier enters)
VIZIER A …. Ah …. Ah …. CHOO! (He sneezes and a plant or piece of scenery on the opposite side of the stage falls over!). Oh dear me! (He claps and everyone gets up, bows to the royal family and exit)
EMPRESS Oh how I love my flowers. Take a deep breath my dear and smell the magic of the Misembryanthemum … the richness of the rose … the excitement of the Azelias
CHI-KI And which is the fairest flower of them all your Majesty?
EMPRESS Why … Jasmine of course! And when the gardens are in full bloom, then shall your life blossom …
VIZIER Your majesty is referring to the impending betrothal in the near future of the Princess Jasmine?
EMPRESS Indeed …
JASMINE … and I’ll have none of it mummy. I’ll marry the man I love and no one else!
EMPRESS But … my dear … the coffers of the treasury need replenishing and what better than to arrange your marriage to a rich Prince of the Orient?
CHI-KI Leyton Orient from League Two? I heard that their owner runs a chip shop …
CHOP CHOP (Head appears from the wings) You called?
ALL NO! She said Chip Shop … not Chop Chop!
NA-NA (Head appears from the wings) Who’s a ‘nana now?
VIZIER GO AWAY! (Their heads disappear from view)
EMPRESS No … Prince Ying Tong Ping Pong Ding Dong Fing Fong Bing Bong Tiddle Eye Po …
Aladdin
Page 15
JASMINE I shall never agree unless he is the man I love
EMPRESS Let’s not argue about this on the day of the Royal Parade. I believe the Grand Vizier has some entertainment arranged for us … ?
VIZIER Indeed your Highness … (he claps and the tiny dancers run on to perform their routine)
SONG/DANCE: “China In Your Hands” – Young Dancers
(SFX: Loud gong)
EMPRESS Is it tea time already?
VIZIER No your highness … it’s almost time for the Royal Parade …
EMPRESS Then we should go and prepare ourselves. (To Jasmine) Come my dear
JASMINE May I be excused for a moment? I’d just like to enjoy the beautiful flowers for a while?
EMPRESS Of course …. But don’t be long …
(Empress and Vizier exit)
JASMINE (Walks to front of stage and speaks to audience) It’s no fun being a Royal Princess you know. It’s always “do this”; “wear that” … and I’m sick of it!
CHI-KI Who are you talking to?
JASMINE Why – the boys and girls of course!
CHI-KI (To Jasmine) Quickly – hide yourself … the place is full of commoners …
JASMINE I’ll talk to them if I want to …
CHI-KI But your highness …
VIZIER (enters and notices Jasmine and Chi-Ki) …. What on earth? (Sees audience). Send for the Royal Executioner!
JASMINE No wait … what are you doing?
VIZIER I have no choice. The law is plain. (he pulls a scroll out). Section 2, paragraph 1, Clause iii (eye eye eye) … “Any commoners who look at Princess Jasmine will have their heads chopped off” (Executioner enters). (To Executioner) You heard … get chopping!
(Executioner stomps to front of stage)
JASMINE Oh dear … what have I done? (To audience) I’m terribly sorry …
VIZIER (To Executioner) You can start with the front row and work your way to the back
Aladdin
Page 16
(Executioner goes into the audience)
CHI-KI No wait …
VIZIER They are all commoners … they must die!
CHI-KI No … they’re not commoners! (Winks at Jasmine and encourages her)
JASMINE (puzzled) They’re not?
CHI-KI No! Remember, you were just about to ask them to (winks again) formally introduce themselves?
JASMINE (She gets it!) Ah … yes. (To Vizier) In private. Cover your ears (he does). (To Executioner) You too (he does). (To audience) I don’t want you to lose your heads on my account … so listen carefully … You’ll have to pretend that you’re royal, like me! So … if I say “My name is Princess Jasmine … what’s yours?” … you shout back your name, but put “Prince” or “Princess” in front of it. Get it?
CHI-KI They don’t sound so sure … perhaps they should practise it?
JASMINE Good idea! (To audience). Hello boys and girls …, my name is Princess Jasmine … what’s yours?
AUDIENCE “Prince ….”; Princess …”
CHI-KI Very good! But you’ll have to shout it louder to fool him!
VIZIER (Uncovers ears) Enough of this time wasting! (To Executioner who is still covering his ears) Chop off their heads! (Executioner doesn’t move … he can’t hear!) Doh! (Vizier speaks to member of audience or band) Sorry … could you ask him to uncover his ears? (They do) Thankyou! (To Executioner) CHOP OFF THE COMMONERS HEADS! (Executioner raises axe)
JASMINE They’re not commoners …
(Executioner lowers his axe)
VIZIER They’re not?
CHI-KI No – they’re all Princes and Princesses
VIZIER I don’t believe you
JASMINE I’ll prove it! (To audience) Ready? Hello ... my name is Princess Jasmine … what’s yours?
AUDIENCE “Prince …”; “Princess …”
JASMINE Told you so!
VIZIER I’ve never seen so much royalty in one place! (To Executioner) You can go. Hurry up! Chop chop!
Aladdin
Page 17
CHOP CHOP (Enters) If you find yourself in trouble, call for Chop Chop on the double!
VIZIER Not now! Get off! (Chop Exits). I’m so sorry your Majesty … (He bows and exits)
CHI-KI That was a close one Princess! (to audience) Well done everybody.
(loud shout offstage as Aladdin appears, apparently falling off the wall)
JASMINE What was that?
CHI-KI (looking off stage) It looks as though someone has climbed the palace wall and fallen. If I am not mistaken it is the son of Widow Twankey who runs the laundry in the market square. It appears he may have hurt himself.
(Aladdin enters limping)
ALADDIN Ow! Oh - excuse me ladies
CHI-KI Are you hurt?
ALADDIN Oh, just a few scratches and bruises, that’s all.
CHI-KI Well thank goodness for that … but what are you doing here? You know that if you are caught here you will have your head chopped off.
ALADDIN (ignoring her – his eyes are only on Jasmine) I would gladly accept my punishment just to gaze on one who is so beautiful.
JASMINE (turning to face ALADDIN) You have climbed the wall just to see me. That’s very dangerous.
ALADDIN I would have climbed a mountain just to get a glimpse of you.
JASMINE (aside to Chi-Ki) He is rather handsome, don’t you think?
CHI-KI Yes, but remember what the Empress said.
JASMINE But she’s not here, is she? Why don’t you pop along and keep look out? Make sure the Empress or the Vizier don’t return. I want to talk to this head strong young man.
CHI-KI But think of the trouble we could all be in.
JASMINE Oh please Chi-Ki, let me have a little adventure. I’ll be fine.
ALADDIN Yes please Chi-Ki, just leave us alone for a few minutes.
CHI-KI Alright then, but on your heads be it. (Chi-Ki exits)
JASMINE Would you really risk your life just to see me?
ALADDIN Indeed I would.
JASMINE I don’t even know your name.
Aladdin
Page 18
ALADDIN Aladdin
JASMINE Aladdin. (laughing) I don’t know whether you are incredibly foolish or impetuously exciting.
ALADDIN The latter I can assure you. You don’t know how long I have dreamed of this moment.
JASMIN I too have dreamed that one day I would meet someone. Someone very special, someone that could change my world.
SONG: “Whole New World” - Aladdin and Jasmine
CHI-KI Your Highness, the Vizier is returning.
JASMINE Aladdin, quickly … you must go.
ALADDIN But I can’t leave you now.
JASMINE You must or else you will be arrested. Chi-Ki … show Aladdin the safe route from the Palace gardens … and Aladdin … please be careful.
(Aladdin and Chi-Ki start to exit)
ALADDIN I will, don’t worry, when will I see you again?
JASMINE Go, quickly. (they exit)
VIZIER (enters with Chop Chop and Na-na) Where is he? We believe a Commoner has been sighted in the grounds.
JASMINE Well we haven’t seen anyone have we Chi-Ki?
CHI-KI Erm …No!
VIZIER Well he won’t get away. Peking police force, are you ready for action?
CHOP CHOP We’re ready Sir
NA-NA We’re the action men Sir
VIZIER Good. Let’s be on our way then. This scoundrel must be caught. (Police and Vizier leave, sirens sounding)
JASMINE (to herself ) I do hope Aladdin has got far enough away and that they don’t catch up with him. Who would have thought that I would be so fond of Aladdin after just one brief meeting? I just hope it won’t be too long before our paths meet again …
Aladdin
Page 19
Act One: Scene 5 -The Market Place in Old Peking
(The Slave of the Ring enters)
SLAVE This way, Great Master. (To audience) Ready to boo?
(Abanazar enters wearing a black cape).
ABANAZAR We’ve travelled far through time and space Now tell me Slave, where is this place?
SLAVE This is the Market in Old Peking.
ABANAZAR Ah – the home of Aladdin – the boy I’m seeking?
SLAVE Indeed it is. His mother, the Widow Twankey, runs that laundry o’er yon.
ABANAZAR “O’er yon”? You’re not in “Shakespeare at the George” now …
SLAVE (To audience) I could have been you know … I am classically trained … but a job’s a job … even on a zero hours contract …
ABANAZAR Quiet! (Slave sticks her tongue out at Abanazar) So, my time of triumph now draws near, With Aladdin’s help I’ve naught to fear, The lamp and the Genie I shall take! So tremble children … quiver … quake!
(to slave) You have done well, now be off with you.
SLAVE Charming I’m sure … (to audience) don’t forget to keep on booing him … (exits muttering)
(Widow Twankey enters from Laundry carrying a chair, puts down and sits on it)
TWANKEY What a day I’ve had, I’m totally kna … exhausted (slumps into chair)
ABANAZAR (Approaches Twankey) Ahem …
TWANKEY Oh look. A stranger in town! Male. Warm. Breathing. Ticks all my boxes!
ABANAZAR Good day, my good woman!
TWANKEY Don’t you call me “good”
ABANAZAR Whatever. Tell me, am I addressing the proprietor of this establishment?
TWANKEY That depends … you’re not from Customs and Excise are you?
ABANAZAR No …
TWANKEY And you’re not flogging solar panels?
ABANAZAR Indeed not
Aladdin
Page 20
TWANKEY Then yes – I am she!
ABANAZAR Allow me to introduce myself ma’am. I am a traveller from a far-off land, a land of great mystery and romance …
TWANKEY No, not Bluntisham? I don’t think I have had the pleasure.
ABANAZAR No, I’m not surprised …
TWANKEY Cheek! I mean … who are you?
ABANAZAR Abanazar
TWANKEY No thank you, I’ve just eaten.
ABANAZAR Pardon?
TWANKEY I thought you said ‘Ave a banana’
NA-NA (Head appears from wings) You called?
TWANKEY No! I said “Banana” … not “Na-Na”!
NA-NA Oops! (Exits)
ABANAZAR (Producing some flowers from inside his cape) For you madam.
TWANKEY Thank you, how touching. Do you know I haven’t been touched in years?
ABANAZAR (Aside) I’m not surprised. Now tell me are you Titania Twankey, widow of this parish?
TWANKEY Titania Titania Twankey to be precise. My father said it’d sound better if I had a pair of Tit … erm …why do you ask?
ABANAZAR I am your late husbands’ long lost brother
TWANKEY I didn’t know my late Frankie had a brother.
ABANAZAR Ah yes … the late Frankie Twankey.
TWANKEY He was six feet six tall
ABANAZAR Yes I remember, we used to call him … Lanky Frankie Twankey.
TWANKEY He was a bit of a ladies man until we married …
ABANAZAR Ah … Lanky Frankie Twankey liked a bit of hanky panky… Do you see a likeness between me and your husband?
TWANKEY I’m afraid not!
(Abanazar produces a photograph)
Aladdin
Page 21
ABANAZAR Then take a look at this photograph, it shows your husband and myself enjoying a drink outside of the Seven Wives.
TWANKEY (looks at photo) But there’s only you on there!
ABANAZAR (looks at photo) Oh dear, he must have popped inside to get a round.
TWANKEY It’s very odd that my late husband never mentioned that he had a brother.
ABANAZAR And such a shame too as I had hoped to repay him a large amount of money which he lent me. Of course it could be yours now … and with a little bit of interest …
(Abanazar produces a money bag and jingles coins)
TWANKEY Mind you, he never mentioned that he didn’t have a long lost brother either. (takes money bag)
ABANAZAR Tell me Titania, have you ever thought of marrying again?
TWANKEY No, the memory of my dear Frankie is too dear to me
ABANAZAR So you have only had the one man in your life?
TWANKEY Yes, Only one. No I tell a lie, it’s 27. I forgot that Pyjama party we had in Warboys during the summer of ‘93.
(Enter Wishee Washee and Li-Chi who is quacking frantically)
WISHEE Alright Li-Chi … I’ll get you some dinner. (Noticing Abanazar) Blimey, are we having the chimney swept Mum?
TWANKEY Son, this is your long lost uncle … Haberdashery!
ABANAZAR Abanazar!!
TWANKEY/WISHEE Bless you!
WISHEE Pleased to meet you … I think. Mum I didn’t know I had a long lost uncle.
ABANAZAR Your son! Of course, I can see the likeness. (grabs Wishee) That noble brow!
WISHEE Mu-um!
ABANAZAR That dimpled chin …
WISHEE Mu-um!
ABANAZAR Those beautiful eyes …
WISHEE I think uncle’s a bit “funny”, Mum!
TWANKEY He’s just pleased to see you lad. He’s been long lost for a long time.
Aladdin
Page 22
ABANAZAR Come and sit on your Uncles’ knee (Abanazar sits down on chair and bounces Wishee on his knee) Who’s a great big strapping boy?
WISHEE Mu-um!
ABANAZAR Who’s a lovely boy then? Who’s a lovely boy?
WISHEE Are you sure he’s alright Mum?
ABANAZAR (bouncing Wishee) What a good boy Aladdin is.
WISHEE Aladdin! Aladdin? I’m not Aladdin!
ABANAZAR You’re not!? (Abanazar gets up and drops Wishee on the floor, Li-Chi pecks Abanazar on backside)
ABANAZAR Get off me you dozy duck!
TWANKEY No, No, No … Aladdin’s my other son. This is Wishee Washee, my eldest.
ABANAZAR Well where is Aladdin? He’s the boy I want to see
WISHEE Who knows, probably ogling over that Princess Jasmine …
ABANAZAR (Grabs Wishee) Then find him quickly. This is a matter of urgency!
WISHEE Keep your hair on, chum
ABANAZAR Don’t call me chum, I am not a dog food.
WISHEE Sorry Pal! Anyway you don’t have to wait long, that’s Aladdin coming now. (Aladdin enters running and out of breath followed by Chi-Ki)
TWANKEY Steady on son, what’s the hurry?
ALADDIN Oh, I’m in trouble Mum. I think the police saw me when I was spending some time with the Princess …
CHI-KI He’s in big trouble Mrs Twankey, the police will soon be after him. I helped him escape through the palace gardens. (to Wishee, flirting) Hi Wishee!
WISHEE (to audience) Hello Chi-Ki! See … what did I tell ya … cor!
TWANKEY I told you that would happen, you’ll get your head chopped off, you will.
ALADDIN I know Mum but they’ve got to catch me first. Anyway it was worth it. Jasmine is the most beautiful girl I have ever met.
(Wishee and Li-Chi imitate being sick)
TWANKEY Well anyway listen, this is your long lost uncle … Aberystwyth
ABANAZAR Abanazar!!
Aladdin
Page 23
TWANKEY/WISHEE/ALADDIN/CHI-KI Bless you!
ALADDIN I never knew I had a long lost uncle?
ABANAZAR That’s because I was lost. Now my dear, dear nephew … (Abanazar puts his arm round Aladdin)
WISHEE Watch him Aladdin, I think he’s a bit qu ….
TWANKEY Wishee!!
WISHEE Quick …?
ABANAZAR I have travelled far in search of you. I am here to make you rich.
ALADDIN Rich? That’s great. What do I have to do?
ABANAZAR There is a secret cave, known only to me. I will take you there. Be guided by me, and you will achieve great wealth.
TWANKEY Would you really do that for my son?
ABANAZAR Of course, my raven-haired beauty (Abanazar kisses Twankey’s hand and then wipes his lips on his sleeve, gagging)
ALADDIN I want to come with you but the only trouble is I have only just met Jasmine and I really don’t want to lose her …
ABANAZAR I am sure she will wait for you and just think with all your new found wealth you will be able to buy her anything she wants for. Come on lad … It’s time for making your mind up …
SONG – “Making Your Mind Up” - Twankey, Chi-Ki, Aladdin, Wishee & Abanazar
(Comedy routine involving Twankey and Chi-Ki having their skirts ripped off revealing hot pants a la Bucks Fizz. Chi-Ki’s look fantastic. Twankey’s don’t! At the end of song we hear commotion off stage. Police sirens etc)
ALADDIN I knew it, that’s the police! OK – I’ve made my mind up. Come on uncle we had better put our skates on. Goodbye Mum, Wishee. Oh … and Chi-Ki … please take good care of the Princess while I am away …
(Abanazar and Aladdin exit)
CHI-KI I will Aladdin …
TWANKEY Take care Son. I do hope he will be OK (starts to sob)
(Vizier, Empress and the executioner enter)
VIZIER Good day … Madam?? We are looking for a boy called Aladdin and we have reason to believe he maybe in the vicinity.
Aladdin
Page 24
TWANKEY No … he’s not here.
VIZIER I don’t believe you madam. If you lie to me – you may be in for the chop …
CHOP CHOP (Enters) You called Sir?
VIZIER Yes … you ‘nana
NA-NA (Enters) Nee naw … nee naw … you called Sir?
VIZIER Oh good grief! I want you to trace the boy Aladdin’s whereabouts.
CHOP CHOP His whereabouts?
VIZIER Yes - here abouts …
NA-NA … at 4 o’clock or thereabouts?
VIZIER In this vicinity or roundabout …
CHOP/NA-NA We are perfect police officers …
VIZIER More like perfect layabouts. You two are useless. Sorry Empress, it looks as though we may have drawn a blank
EMPRESS We have to find this intruder, the privacy of the Princess is of the utmost importance. He must be caught or someone’s head will roll (glares at everyone). I will search this way, you can give those potty policemen their instructions.
VIZIER Very well madam. (Empress and executioner exit. Vizier, Chop and Na-na come forward as front curtain closes). You heard the Empress. We need to search every square inch of this land. I will start over here, you two go that way, see what you can find.
CHOP CHOP You can rely on us Sir
NA-NA Yes … you can rely on us sir
VIZIER I wish …
(Vizier exits, policemen exit through audience asking them if they’ve seen Aladdin, heads will roll etc)
Aladdin
Page 25
Act One: Scene 6 – Outside the Magic Cave
(Front curtains partly open to reveal a large rock covering the entrance. It is evening. Abanazar enters carrying an unlit lantern)
ABANAZAR This must be where the cave is located. We seemed to have been walking for hours. (looks back off stage) That lazy Aladdin has stopped for another rest, or maybe he’s popped into Chicken Licken’ for a Burger! Anyway that gives me the opportunity to summon the Slave. (he rubs the ring and the slave appears)
SLAVE (yawning and wearing dressing gown) Did you summon me?
ABANAZAR I did.
SLAVE Don’t you know what the time is? I was just off to bed and have a read of my book. ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’
ABANAZAR Have we reached the climax?
SLAVE Well almost … you see he’s just tied her up and is about to …
ABANAZAR Not your book! Now tell me, are we near the magic cave?
SLAVE You followed my instructions didn’t you?
ABANAZAR Yes, yes, yes I did all that.
SLAVE Well then, just look for a large rock concealing the entrance to the cave.
ABANAZAR (crossing to rock) Ah! Could this be it?
SLAVE Clever you, it’s the only rock I can see around here.
ABANAZAR I expected it to be bigger and bolder and stand out more.
SLAVE What do you want … gold plated with door chimes?
ABANAZAR Well, anyway I have found it.
SLAVE May I leave now?
ABANAZAR (impatient) Yes, yes you can go. (slave exits) Soon the treasures will be all mine. I can’t wait to get my hands on that magic lamp. (Aladdin enters)
ALADDIN Who were you talking to uncle?
ABANAZAR (spinning round) Eh? Oh no one, just to myself.
ALADDIN Be careful uncle, you know what they say about people talking to themselves?
ABANAZAR Yes, yes, I know. Look over here, we have reached the magic cave.
Aladdin
Page 26
ALADDIN What … this is where the treasures are stored? It seems an odd place to keep them. I’m not sure whether I believe you.
ABANAZAR Why would I lie to you? I promised you wealth didn’t I? I could have easily claimed it all for myself.
ALADDIN I suppose so
ABANAZAR Then let’s get on with it. Stand aside while I recite the words that will reveal the opening to the cave.
From East and West, from South and North All earthly powers I now call forth With your strength you will instantly Reveal the entrance now for me.
(Thunder and lightning crash around them and with a loud grinding noise the rock slowly starts to roll away)
ALADDIN The rock, look, it’s moving!
ABANAZAR Finally!
ALADDIN How did you do that?
ABANAZAR I have powers beyond comprehension. Now quickly I want you to climb into the cave.
ALADDIN Why me?
ABANAZAR You want to see the treasures don’t you?
ALADDIN Yes.
ABANAZAR Well then, get in.
ALADDIN And I can keep all the treasure I can find?
ABANAZAR Everything my boy … everything except an old lamp. That’s the only thing I want.
ALADDIN What’s so special about an old lamp?
ABANAZAR It has great sentimental value to me, it belonged to my great Grandmother’s Godmother’s Uncle’s Brothers’ Second Cousin Once Removed …
ALADDIN A close relation then?
ABANAZAR (Impatient) It’s a family heirloom. That’s all I want so get in there quickly.
ALADDIN (Peering through entrance) It looks so dark and gloomy.
ABANAZAR You’re not afraid, a great big strapping lad like you …
Aladdin
Page 27
ALADDIN Are you coming with me?
ABANAZAR No, somebody needs to guard the entrance in case any undesirables come along and try to steal our treasure.
ALADDIN Are you sure there’s nothing to fear in there?
ABANAZAR No, nothing at all. Now get in quickly.
ALADDIN All right. Here I go then (climbs through entrance) I’m in.
ABANAZAR Good
ALADDIN (coming out) Nope! I’m out!
ABANAZAR You are beginning to make me angry. You wouldn’t like me when when I’m angry!
ALADDIN OK (goes back in) I’m in! I’m in!
ABANAZAR Good!
ALADDIN (coming out) I’m out again.
ABANAZAR (really angry) What are you playing at boy?
ALADDIN I thought I heard noises in there. Maybe there are monsters in there …
ABANAZAR (handing him the lantern) Here … take this.
ALADDIN OK, here I go then. (enters cave)
ABANAZAR (calling) Can you see anything?
ALADDIN (off) It’s pitch black in here
ABANAZAR Keep going lad. Your eyes will soon acclimatise. (To the audience) That stupid boy, little does he realise that as soon as he hands me the lamp I will close the entrance and leave him down there to perish. By morning I shall be back in Egypt and proclaim myself Ruler of this Universe. (laughs loudly to himself, lights fade and the inner cave scene opens)
Aladdin
Page 28
Act One: Scene 7 - Inside the cave (UV Scene)
(A large part of the stage is in total darkness – containing fluorescent rocks, jewels, stalactites etc.,
and a large arch with black cloth screens across. Two operators (dressed in black) remain invisible
throughout. Dim daylight comes through the cave entrance – a small free standing cut out. Aladdin
enters through the entrance … a dim follow spot follows him throughout…)
ALADDIN It’s really dark and spooky in here …
ABANAZAR (Off) Aladdin! Can you see the lamp?
ALADDIN No – it’s too dark …
ABANAZAR (Off) Light the candle then!
ALADDIN I was just going to … (As he switches on the candle … the UV lights are switched on and the cave interior glows)
ALADDIN Cor! Just look at that! Amazing! Emeralds and rubies as big as your head … sapphires the size of …
ABANAZAR (Off) Never mind the jewels! Get the lamp!
ALADDIN What lamp? There isn’t any lamp!
ABANAZAR (Off) Hurry up!
ALADDIN Keep your wig on! (To audience) Can you see the lamp anywhere? (The lamp “appears” in the UV area. Operator 1 takes it from behind the black screen and “flies” it)
AUDIENCE Yes! Behind you etc
ALADDIN Where? Over there? (As he turns to look, Operator 1 masks it with black material). There’s nothing there! You’re imagining things! (Operator 1 has moved and reveals the lamp in a different place. Audience responds and Aladdin sees it). Oh there it is!
ABANAZAR Fetch it boy! Bring me the lamp!
ALADDIN (Tries to catch the lamp but it moves away). It won’t keep still! Come back here you pesky lamp! (The lamp flies back to him and he takes hold of it) Got it!
ABANAZAR (Off) Give it to me – QUICK!
ALADDIN (Examining the lamp) What do you want this dirty old thing for? It could do with a good polish …
ABANAZAR (Off) NO! You mustn’t rub it. Only I know how to handle it. Give it to me!
ALADDIN I don’t know (to audience). Do you think I should let him have it?
AUDIENCE No!
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ABANAZAR (Off and angry) GIVE ME THAT LAMP!
ALADDIN Shan’t!
ABANAZAR (Off and desperate) Any second now – the entrance will close forever. Give me the lamp!
ALADDIN No! (SFX: Rumbling … thunder etc – the entrance is closing!)
ABANAZAR (Off and shrieking) It’s too late! Noooooo ….. (fades)
ALADDIN Oh dear … what have I done? (Moves to entrance) Abanazar? ABANAZAR? OPEN UP! (no reply). I didn’t mean it … HELP! (Then to audience) It’s no use. He can’t hear me. I’m trapped! I’ll never see Mum or Wishee or Jasmine ever again … and all because of this stupid old lamp! What am I to do? Do you have any ideas?
AUDIENCE Rub the lamp (etc)
ALADDIN What was that?
AUDIENCE Rub the lamp (etc)
ALADDIN Rub the lamp? Are you sure?
AUDIENCE (Probably screaming by now!) YES!!!
ALADDIN Alright! I’ll try anything to get out of here. (He turns sideways and holds the lamp at arms length and rubs it). One … two … three … (the lamp is taken by Operator 1 and moved behind the screen. Magical SFX. Aladdin moves to the side of the stage)
ALADDIN It’s gone off again! I’ll never get back to Peking now … (He sits)
(What the audience now sees is the lamp hovering in mid-air and a white “mist” flows out of the spout, forming a “cloud”. The Genie materialises inside the cloud which then disappears and the genie appears to hover above the stage! What actually happens is …
1. The Genie is hidden behind the black screens under the arch – either sitting on a raised platform or possibly standing on a blacked out trolley which can be moved left and right, and backwards and forwards slightly to create the “hovering effect”
2. A second, (cut out?), lamp is uncovered on the edge of the arch. A large piece of white chiffon* “pours” out of the spout, with Operator(s) pulling it upwards so that it fills the space under the arch [* or dry ice?]
3. The black cloth screens are removed to show the Genie, now behind the chiffon.
4. The chiffon falls away to reveal the Genie in all his glory! The platform or trolley should be moved gently until he gets off it
4.5. Stage is now fully lit – UV’s stay on …)
)
GENIE (American accent) Hey Dood! How’s it hangin’ Bro?
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Page 30
ALADDIN I beg your pardon?
GENIE I said … how’s it hangin’ bro?
ALADDIN Sorry – I thought I was in Egyptthe far east … not downtown Manhattan?
GENIE (Essex “street” accent) So … what is you sayin’ man? Is you dissin’ my verbocity or somefink innit?
ALADDIN (To audience) I can’t understand a word he’s saying!
GENIE (Normal accent) Ah – middle class, east of England … hint of Fenland … sorry – I never know who’swhere I’m going to appear … Is this any better?
ALADDIN Ah – yes … but who are you?
GENIE (rapping) I am the magic Genie from the lamp in your hand … What is it thatis it that you desire – your wish is my command …?
ALADDIN Well – first things first … where did you come from?
GENIE As I said … I am the magic Genie from the lamp in your hand …
ALADDIN (looking at obvious size discrepancy) … Yeah , yeah … but how did you get in there?
GENIE Ever heard of the Tardis?
ALADDIN You’re Dr Who?
GENIE No! I’m just asking you to suspend disbelief and go with the whole “– bigger on the inside than on the outside” thing … now – can I get back to my rap?
ALADDIN If you must …
GENIE Good … now Greetings dude … for years I’ve been hidden But now I’m here just to do your biddin’!
ALADDIN I don’t understand …
GENIE I’m the Genie of the Lamp and your personal slave Give me a list of the things that you crave …
ALADDIN (To audience) This is amaze-balls … GENIE You got it in one but believe what you see But trust me … you ain’t never had a friend like me!
SONG: You ain’t never had a friend like me - Genie and Senior Dancers
ALADDIN You mean I can have anything I want in the whole world?
GENIE Jewels and clothes … go on and take-a your pick Or perhaps you have your eye on a very special chick (Aladdin reacts to this)
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Oh … I can see that you do – now don’t be a meanie Just put me to work … I’m your personal Genie …
ALADDIN Wait! You can give me wealth?
GENIE Way more than [local MP] offered you in the Election … …
ALADDIN … and a fine Palace?
GENIE Just flash those baby blues and it’ll be yours …
ALADDIN … and a full makeover for my Mum to make her beautiful?
GENIE You’re pushing your luck – but I like a challenge …
ALADDIN … and …
GENIE … Can I make Princess Jasmine fall in love with you? … no ..
ALADDIN (downhearted) No?
GENIE No dude! She’s already madly in love with you … I can just grease the wheels to get everything right for you two!
ALADDIN But … what about getting out of here?
GENIE Aha! Now you’re talking … but before I break down these walls … how’d you like to see some of the wonders of this li’l ole cave?
ALADDIN Yes please!
GENIE Now I can see that your eyes are a-poppin’ Why don’t we do some Christmas shoppin’? (Stage lights dim and Genie moves Aladdin downstage. During the next sequence Aladdin quietly slips out of view for his quick change. Ensemble and dancers enter at the appropriate time. All wear vivid UV outfits in green (emeralds), white (diamonds), blue (sapphires), red (rubies) and gold (gold, dummy!)
GENIE In the great big ocean depths are seen Shining jewels of emerald green …
(Emeralds are paraded)
Night black seams within earths’ core From crystal fountains diamonds pour …
(Diamonds are paraded)
Come on guys, bring into view Icy stones of sapphire blue ..
(Sapphires are paraded)
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From deep below and forged in fire Rubies for your heart’s desire …
(Rubies are paraded)
(At the end of the tableau, Genie makes a magic pass and Aladdin reappears dressed in his
resplendent and glittery new clothes)
ALADDIN Genie – this is fantastic … I can’t thank you enough
GENIE No problem boss … let’s get you home …
Now for a wondrous sight to behold Loads and loads of glistening … GOLD! (Gold is paraded – bright stage lights)
SONG: GOLD – Aladdin, Genie, Ensemble
Scene ends with Pyro flashes on final “Gold!”
Tabs close … end of Act One
Aladdin
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Act Two: Scene 1 - The Throne Room of the Palace (in China)
(Princess Jasmine is slumped on her throne … very unhappy. Chi-Ki, Vizier and Empress are fussing
over her. Some Courtiers look on – they’re also sad)
SONG: “Make ‘em laugh” – Ensemble, Chi-Ki, Vizier, Empress
JASMINE Stop fussing Mummy. I’m unhappy and that’s all there is to it
EMPRESS I’ve told you darling … “you know who” has left Peking … so there is no use crying
over spilt milk.
(She slumps even more and sulks)
VIZIER It’s no use everybody … the Princess is not amused … perhaps we may move on to
the next act? Maybe some Hip Hop …?
CHOP CHOP (enters with Na-Na) You called Sir?
VIZIER I said Hip Hop … not Chop Chop!
NA-NA (to audience) Did you all get sweets and ice creams and fizzy drinks during the
interval?
AUDIENCE Yes!
VIZIER (groans) Oh that’s all I need! This lot are so full of sugar they’re going to be
bouncing off the walls … and the Princess is in a right Royal huff. She’s not even
speaking to her mother now …
EMPRESS (waving hand in front of Jasmine … to no avail). Yoo hoo. Darling! Speak to
Mummy
VIZIER See what I mean? She’s been like this since Aladdin disappeared
(Jasmine sobs loudly)
EMPRESS Now see what you’ve done! I told you never to mention that name!
CHOP CHOP What name?
NA-NA Aladdin, you fool
(Jasmine sobs again)
EMPRESS Argh! Now – do something! Make her laugh or I’ll have all your heads chopped off!
(Executioner has quietly appeared behind Chop Chop and Na-Na … sneaks up behind them)
EXECUTIONER Boo! (Chuckles loudly. Chop Chop and Na-Na jump with fright!)
VIZIER Does anyone know any little stories that may amuse the Princess?
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ENSEMBLE “No”; “Not me”; “Sorry” etc
(Chop Chop and Na-Na raise their hands vigorously and jump up and down like little children who
know the answer to a teachers’ question)
CHOP CHOP/NA-NA Ooh sir! Please Sir! Us Sir! Etc
(Vizier ignores them and speaks to Executioner)
VIZIER Do you know any good jokes?
EXECUTIONER (Mumbles and shakes his head)
CHOP CHOP/NA-NA (getting more excited) Ooh sir! Please Sir! Us Sir! Etc
(Vizier ignores them and speaks to audience)
VIZIER What about you? Know any good jokes … nothing rude though? No? Oh dear
CHOP CHOP/NA-NA (almost wetting themselves!) Ooh sir! Please Sir! Us Sir! Etc
VIZIER I know I’m letting myself into trouble … go on then …
CHOP CHOP This is a funny story … (clears throat) Ahem …
NA-NA Oh – that’s not fair … I wanted to go first!
CHOP CHOP Well – you’re not! (clears throat) Ahem …Why did the toilet roll roll down the hill?
VIZIER I don’t know … why did the toilet roll roll down the hill?
CHOP CHOP Because it wanted to get to the bottom!
(All laugh … Jasmine isn’t amused)
NA-NA Now me! What do you call a fairy that hasn’t had a bath?
VIZIER I don’t know – what do you call a fairy that hasn’t had a bath?
NA-NA Stinkerbell! Get it?
(All laugh … Jasmine still isn’t amused)
EMPRESS it still isn’t working …
CHOP CHOP How about a story about Jack McGrew?
”Jack McGrew was five foot two
And hated the way he was built
‘Cos dogs would follow him all around
And sniff right up his kilt!
(Jasmine smiles weakly … but then sinks back miserably)
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EMPRESS That nearly worked ….
NA-NA I’ve got a better one!
I wish I were a caterpillar
For life would be a farce (pause)
I’d climb up all the buds and trees
And slide down on my ….
CHOP CHOP You can’t say that!
NA-NA … bottom!
(Everybody laughs … Jasmine sits up ….)
VIZIER Still not enough? There is only one item left on the agenda …. Bring on the Royal
Magician … the Great Garry Baldy!
CHI-KI That’ll take the biscuit!
(General amusement)
ENSEMBLE Call for the Royal Magician …. (echo’s) …
(Magician makes a dramatic entrance)
GARRY BALDY Ladies and gentlemen … now for an amazing feat of magic … I require the
assistance of a pretty young girl (Chi-Ki volunteers)
(He performs an amazing magic trick which involves Chi-Ki disappearing and Aladdin appearing
wearing a regal costume and a Harlequin mask and carrying the old lamp …)
ALADDIN (in a strange accent) Greetings earthlings!
CHOP CHOP It’s a thing from outer space!
(Aladdin holds the lamp like a pistol)
NA-NA Look out – he’s armed! I’m too young to die!
VIZIER … but that can be arranged …
NA-NA Run for your lives!
(General commotion)
ALADDIN Stay where you are! (He rubs the lamp, bang and flash and Genie appears). Do not
be frightened … I come in peace
CHOP CHOP He comes in peace … and we’re going to pieces!
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Page 36
ALADDIN (to audience, lifting the mask) Hello everybody – you guessed it was me didn’t
you?
EMPRESS W-who are y-you?
ALADDIN (grandly) I am the incredibly wealthy Prince Niddala
EMPRESS (impressed) A wealthy Prince?
VIZIER Nid-da-la? That’s a strange name?
ALADDIN (to audience) It’s “Aladdin” spelt backwards! (to the crowd). And this is my friend
… Genie …
GENIE Yo y’all!
ALADDIN He has great magical powers … he guards all my new found wealth …
EMPRESS Wealth?
ALADDIN Yes … gold .. sapphires, rubies, emeralds … treasures beyond belief …
EMPRESS Yes – but why have you come here?
ALADDIN I have come to make the Princess laugh.
VIZIER You’ll be lucky- she hasn’t smiled for days …
EMPRESS … and we’ve tried everything …
ALADDIN I guarantee that the Princess will smile again … but if I succeed you must promise
to give me her hand in marriage …
EMPRESS I promise … anything to see my daughter happy again …
(Jasmine walks down to Aladdins’ side. He takes off the mask)
JASMINE Aladdin!
ALL Aladdin?
ALADDIN Yes – it’s me!
JASMINE I didn’t recognise you!
ALADDIN It’s these fine clothes! I can buy anything now. I can build you the most beautiful
palace in the world with golden …
JASMINE I’m not interested in your wealth Aladdin. I loved you when you were poor …
ALADDIN I haven’t changed. I’m still the Aladdin you remember …
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Page 37
VIZIER But you’re still not a Prince … you’re a commoner! (to the Police). Arrest that boy!
Chop chop! (Chop Chop and Na-Na don’t move). I don’t believe it! I meant it this
time!
(Chop Chop and Na-Na move forward reluctantly)
JASMINE Wait! Mother … you promised he could marry me if he made me smile …
EMPRESS Well … we’re still waiting?
SONG: “Price Tag” – Aladdin, Jasmine, Ensemble
(At end of song, Ensemble exit … Jasmine is beaming with happiness!)
EMPRESS It’s so good to see you happy again … I made you a promise … you have my
blessing to get married … Vizier … we need to discuss arrangements …
(Empress, Vizier, Chop Chop and Na-Na exit)
ALADDIN Thanks your Highness! Genie … I need you to transport us to my Mum’s so that we
can give her the good news …
(They start to move forward to front of stage)
GENIE Your wish is my command young man
You might think it a strange thing
One wave of my hand and you’ll be off
To your street in Old Peking …
(Aladdin and Jasmine are at front as tabs close)
ALADDIN Mum’s in for such a big surprise!
JASMINE Is she where you get your good looks from?
ALADDIN Hardly … but she’ll be so surprised to hear of my new found wealth … she’ll never
have to wash again!
JASMINE Won’t she start to smell?
ALADDIN Silly! I mean she’ll never have to wash clothes in the laundry again! It’s a whole
new world for her too!
SONG: Short reprise of Whole New World – Aladdin & Jasmine
(Tabs open behind them to reveal street scene … they step back into the street)
Aladdin
Page 38
Act Two: Scene 2 – (Another) Street In Peking
(As the curtains open – we see Wishee asleep on the ground. Li-Chi is fussing around him trying to
get him to wake up. If the audience don’t shout out – Li Chi encourages them)
AUDIENCE Wakey Wakey, Wishee Washy!
WISHEE (waking up) Oh – thanks everyone. What time is it? Oops … time to get my bum into
gear and get off to the laundry quick! See you soon (they exit as Aladdin and Jasmine
enter from the opposite side of the stage)
JASMINE I can’t wait to meet her
(Twankey is heard singing “If you think I’m sexy” offstage)
ALADDIN Well brace yourself, I can hear her coming now! Tell you what … let’s have a bit of
fun. You pretend to be a commoner who’s deeply in love. I’ll hide over there and
surprise her at the right moment.
(He hides downstage. Twankey enters, dressed with a very large, lit lampshade hat, and followed by
a sleepy Wishee and Li-Chi)
WISHEE Mum, why are you wearing a lampshade as a hat?
TWANKEY It’s just a little number I picked up from Homebase to wear the next time I go to the
Music Box. Do you like it? The man in the shop said I would light the place up!
WISHEE Light it up? You’re more likely to burn it down!
TWANKEY Cheek! Oh look Wishee, there’s a pretty young girl over there.
WISHEE Cor … Yea! She’s a right cracker.
TWANKEY Wishee, crackers are for pulling.
WISHEE (to audience) I’m saying nothing.
TWANKEY (walking over to Jasmine) Hello dear, I haven’t seen you around here before?
JASMINE (in a Dick Van Dyke “mockney” accent) Oh, I’m just an ordinary servant girl working
at the Palace, lordy love a duck
WISHEE Then you must know Chi-Ki?
JASMINE Chi-Ki, Oh yes I know her alright, cor blimey
WISHEE She fancies me. Mind you – I quite like her too!
TWANKEY Why are you here?
JASMINE Well you see I’m just waiting for my boyfriend, he’ll be along any minute. I love him
so much. Strewth!
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Page 39
TWANKEY I wonder if I know him, what’s his name?
JASMINE Aladdin.
TWANKEY Aladdin!! Aladdin Twankey?
JASMINE Yes!
TWANKEY Well I never! I’m his Mum, Titiana Titania Twankey. (shaking her hand) But how can
you fall in love with a lazy scruffy lad like that … tatty clothes, patches in his trousers,
tidemark round his neck?
JASMINE Well I think you’ll find he’s changed …
TWANKEY Changed!! Not likely! He only put his clean boxers on two weeks ago!
JASMINE Not just his clothes Mrs Twankey!
ALADDIN (enters) Look for yourself Mum.
TWANKEY Aladdin, you’re back! (hugging him) I thought I’d lost you forever! (looking him up
and down). But where did you get all this gear from? You haven’t been shoplifting
from Peacocks again?
ALADDIN No Mum I haven’t! I take it you have said hello to my girlfriend … Jasmine?
TWANKEY/WISHEE Not Princess Jasmine?
ALADDIN Yes … The Princess Jasmine?
TWANKEY (pushing Wishee aside, curtseying, ratchet sound as back locks) Your Gracefulness,
your Highnesship, your Exaltednessness … charmed to make your acquaintance.
ALADDIN Yes OK Mum … don’t go over the top.
TWANKEY Hmmm … so … tell me all about what happened when you went away with your
Uncle Howsyourfather.
ALADDIN Abanazar! It’s a long story…. But Mum I’ve done it! I’ve found my fortune! We found
the cave that Uncle spoke of … but he locked me in it when I didn’t give him the
object he was searching for …
TWANKEY What was that?
ALADDIN (holds up the lamp) This!
WISHEE A dirty old lamp?
ALADDIN It may be dirty – but it holds the key to …
(Chi Ki runs in, breathless)
Aladdin
Page 40
CHI KI (To Jasmine) Oh your highness! Found you at last! Your mother is looking for you.
She needs to speak to you about the wedding …
TWANKEY Wedding? What wedding?
ALADDIN I was just about to tell you Mum (Holds hands with Jasmine) … The Empress has
given her blessing for Jasmine and I to get married!
TWANKEY I can’t believe it! My little boy marrying into royalty! Oh – I remember the day me
and Frankie got married … just like it was yesterday. Mind you …. if it was tomorrow
… I’d cancel it (She grabs Jasmine and hugs her). Welcome to the Twankey family
Jazz!
WISHEE (He hugs Twankey) Yeah! Welcome to the family Sis!
CHI KI (She joins in the group hug by hugging Wishee) Isn’t this wonderful?
WISHEE (Noticing she’s hugging him) It certainly is!
CHI KI Maybe one day Wishee … we could …
TWANKEY Enough of all this canoodling! If we’re going to meet royalty … we need to get our
best clobber on! Come on you two … back to the laundry! And you (to Aladdin) get
rid of that dirty old lamp! What would the neighbours say?
ALADDIN But Mum …
JASMINE Give it to me – I’ll look after it for you!
TWANKEY There you see!
ALADDIN But Mum …
TWANKEY Surely you trust your lovely Princess?
ALADDIN But Mum …
TWANKEY But what?
ALADDIN (Sighs) Very well … but please take good care of it
JASMINE Of course I will Aladdin
TWANKEY That’s settled then … off we go
(Aladdin hands the lamp over to Jasmine, kisses her and the family exit)
JASMINE You really like Wishee, don’t you?
CHI KI Yes … but I don’t know if he likes me …
JASMINE Well … I know he does …because he told me!
Aladdin
Page 41
(Abanazar enters through the audience, disguised as a pedlar)
ABANAZAR New lamps for old! New lamps for old!
(As he continues through the audience)
JASMINE What is all that noise?
CHI KI It appears to be an old pedlar …
JASMINE What is he saying?
CHI KI It sounds like “new lamps for old”!
(Abanazar reaches the stage)
ABANAZAR New lamps for old! Hello lovely ladies!
JASMINE Is it true? You are offering new lamps in exchange for old ones?
ABANAZAR Indeed I am
CHI KI But why?
ABANAZAR I am a restorer of beautiful things … so why not give me your old, dusty lamp … and
I will give you a beautiful, shiny, new one in return?
CHI KI That sounds too good to be true. (To Jasmine) Are you sure Aladdin would want you
to exchange it?
JASMINE Well I think so … but why don’t we ask the other Princes and Princesses? (To
audience) What do you think? Should we exchange the dirty lamp for a lovely shiny
one?
AUDIENCE No!
CHI KI Oh yes we should!
AUDIENCE Oh no you shouldn’t!
CHI KI Oh yes we should!
AUDIENCE Oh no you shouldn’t!
JASMINE Oh dear … now I’m not so sure …
ABANAZAR Then perhaps you would like to accept this (he pulls the Slave’s Ring off his finger)
beautiful shiny ring in addition to a new lamp …?
CHI KI (To Jasmine) That would make a lovely wedding ring …
JASMINE You’re right!
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Page 42
ABANAZAR So … deal or no deal?
JASMINE (hesitates) Deal!
(Abanazar hands over the ring to Chi Ki, a new lamp to Jasmine and grabs the old lamp)
ABANAZAR (throwing off the pedlars cloak) At last – the lamp is mine! (with an evil cackle he
grabs Jasmine) And so are you! (He rubs the lamp. Pyro. Genie appears. Jasmine
screams)
GENIE My master calls? I must obey
Oh no … not you … this ain’t my day
ABANAZAR Well what a pity, I’m so sad
That your new master turned out bad
GENIE Just cut the chat – I’ll do as told
What do you want? A stash of gold?
ABANAZAR Take us both to distant lands
To sunny Egypts’ desert sands
GENIE Be more precise and tell me where …
ABANAZAR Take me to my secret lair!
GENIE No sooner said than done
Off to Egypt for sand and sun … (he puts on a pair of sunglasses)
CHI KI Princess!
JASMINE Find Aladdin … tell him what has happened!
ABANAZAR That foolish boy can’t help you now! Genie …. AWAY!
(Flash as Genie, Abanazar and Jasmine exit)
CHI KI Aladdin! Come quickly!
(Aladdin enters)
ALADDIN What on earth is the matter?
CHI KI Oh Aladdin! It’s your Uncle Aberystwyth …
ALADDIN Abanazar!
CHI Ki … yes … well … he has kidnapped Jasmine!
ALADDIN But how?
CHI Ki We traded your old lamp for a new one …
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Page 43
ALADDIN Oh no – that old lamp was magic!
CHI KI I know now. But he tricked us and summoned a genie and they have all gone to
Egypt!
ALADDIN Then we need to follow them immediately! (shouts) Mum! Wishee!
(Twankey, Wishee and Li Chi enter)
TWANKEY What on earth is all this commotion about?
ALADDIN It’s Uncle! He’s kidnapped Jasmine!
WISHEE Kid? Napped? (yawns) Seems a good idea to me! (He starts to sleep until awakened
by the audience)
AUDIENCE Wakey wakey, Wishee Washee!
TWANKEY Where have they gone?
CHI KI To his secret lair in Egypt
TWANKEY Well – we’d better get after them … Ooh – I hope it’s in Charm A Snake – I hear
that’s lovely …
WISHEE That’s Sharm El Sheikh …
TWANKEY Whatever – I’d better nip off to Boots for some Sun Factor 30 …
CHI KI But we don’t know where they’ve gone in Egypt?
ALADDIN (Notices the ring). Where did you get that from Chi Ki?
CHI KI Abanazar gave us it in part exchange …
ALADDIN I wonder … (he takes the ring and speaks to audience) … what do you think boys
and girls … If this is Abanazars’ ring … do you think I should try rubbing it?
AUDIENCE YES!
WISHEE Are you sure?
AUDIENCE YES!
(Aladdin rubs the ring and the Slave of the Ring appears)
WISHEE (liking what he sees) Wow!
CHI KI Wishee! It’s rude to stare! (she clips him around the earhole)
WISHEE I’m not staring! It’s just that my eyes won’t blink!
SLAVE You rubbed my ring?
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Page 44
ALADDIN Well … you could say that … but I’d rather you’d reworded it!
SLAVE I am the Slave of the Ring … and you are now my Master … and btw … you seem a
lot nicer than my last one ….
TWANKEY Abanazar?
SLAVE Bless you! Yes …
ALADDIN So you know where his secret lair is?
SLAVE In Egypt? Yes
ALADDIN And can you get us there?
SLAVE Almost to his doorstep – but you’ll have to walk the last bit yourself
ALADDIN No problem! Right everyone … who’s with me?
ALL We all are!
ALADDIN So Slave – do your stuff ... take us to Egypt!
SLAVE Your wish is my command ….
CHI KI Wait a minute! We might need reinforcements!
SLAVE No problem. I will send you on ahead on the most efficient forms of transport
available … meanwhile I will go to the Palace and find the others and we will meet
you in Egypt!
(Slave makes mystic arm movements, perhaps some strobe lights and mysterious music … A guided
bus stop sign mysteriously arrives on stage or is projected…)
WISHEE The Guided Bus? You can’t be serious!
CHI KI Well – she did say it was efficient!
WISHEE Yeah – but only if you want to get as far as Cambridge …
TWANKEY Stop your whinging and get on board!
WISHEE Well – you’ll be alright mum – you can use your bus pass!
(They travel on the guided bus with signs showing all the stops until they arrive at Cambridge Railway
Station. Another sign appears saying “Camel Co Egypt Tours – This Way”)
TWANKEY This is it! Come on!
EXEUNT
Aladdin
Page 45
Act Two: Scene 3 - Abanazars Palace in Egypt
(An ornate seat or pile of cushions is set on stage upon which ABANAZAR sits. The old lamp is attached to his belt. Two male guards are in attendance.)
SONG: “Old Bazaar in Cairo” – Abanazar/Ensemble/Slave Girls Dance.
At the end of the dance the girls gather round him, giggling, feeding him grapes, fanning him etc. ABANAZAR Excellent, well done my girls, very nice, now be off with you. GIRL (Sulkily) He doesn’t want us any more now, he only has eyes for that Jasmine girl.
(Girls exit, Abanazar calls to his guards) ABANAZAR Have Princess Jasmine brought to me. (Guards exit) It’s time to give the Genie a
call. (He rubs his lamp, there is a flash and the Genie enters) GENIE Horrible master with a face like thunder What is it you want, I wonder? ABANAZAR I wish you wouldn’t speak like that when you talk to me. GENIE Big Daddy you can see that I walk the walk It shouldn’t be a surprise that I talk the talk! ABANAZAR Really? Well I’m a little tired of all this ridiculous rapping. I require you to talk
properly. GENIE (In a Birmingham accent) Oh you mean in a Brummy accent? ABANAZAR Certainly not, a posh St Ives accent would be more acceptable. GENIE Very good your lordship, how may I please your Lordship? ABANAZAR Tonight I want you to arrange a banquet for me to celebrate me coming the most
powerful man in the universe. (Jasmine is heard shouting at the Guards) GENIE You’re becoming Simon Cowell? JASMINE (off stage) Leave me alone, let go I say! ABANAZAR And that troublesome girl will become my personal slave and made to do some
menial tasks. (Guards bring Jasmine on) ABANAZAR (Clapping hands) You may go. (Guards exit; Genie speaks aside to Jasmine as he
exits) GENIE Be careful Princess what you say and do,
‘Cos he has got some plans for you.
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ABANAZAR My dear Jasmine. How beautiful you look. JASMINE Don’t speak to me in such a familiar way. ABANAZAR Come, come my dear, is that the way to speak with your master? JASMINE Master? ABANAZAR Yes. You are to be my personal slave for the rest of your life. JASMINE Then all I can hope is that my life is short. ABANAZAR But why? I can give you everything your heart desires. JASMINE The only thing I desire is to be back at home with Aladdin. ABANAZAR Aladdin? That foolish boy is helpless without the power of the magic lamp. He will
never find us here so you may as well forget about him. JASMINE Never. ABANAZAR You’ll forget him in time. For too long now you have enjoyed the finer things in life
… but it is only I that can give you them now. JASMINE I’d rather walk the streets in poverty than stay here staring at your repulsive face. ABANAZAR Repulsive? Many say I look like a film star. JASMINE Yes … Frankenstein! (laughs) ABANAZAR Be careful what you say my girl, my patience is rather limited. Perhaps some time
being locked away in your room might change your attitude. JASMINE It won’t be for long. I know Aladdin will rescue me. ABANAZAR Guards! (Guards enter and bow) Take our guest to her room and lock her in.
(Guards take protesting Jasmine off) That headstrong girl will learn to respect me in time. (Thoughtfully) But maybe she is right. I need to consider the possibility that Aladdin may come searching for her. I need to think of a plan that will protect my palace from all intruders, but how? (He gets an idea) I have it! I will call upon the Great Pyramid. (Chants a spell)
Oh ancient guardian of times long past. My command is very clear.
Bring forth and release a mummy to Destroy all intruders who may come near … (Magix FX … lights fade as tabs close)
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Act Two: Scene 4 - The Egyptian Desert ….
(Aladdin, and Chi-Ki enter in “Explorers” outfits. They are obviously tired, hot and sweaty … Wishee
and Li-Chi are in swimming costumes. Twankey is wearing a ludicrous “Cleopatra” outfit with thigh
length slits down the side and a sauce bottle hat)
WISHEE Are we there yet?
ALADDIN (Tired) No ….
(Pause)
WISHEE Are we there yet?
CHI-KI (irritated) No!
(Pause)
WISHEE Are we there yet?
TWANKEY NO! And if you ask us that again I’ll nail your ears to the nearest palm tree!
(Pause)
WISHEE Mum … Have you got any nails?
TWANKEY No!
WISHEE Are we there yet?
ALL NO!
WISHEE Mum – why are you wearing that ridiculous hat?
TWANKEY It’s because I am the “sauce” of the Nile! Ha Ha! Get it?
CHI KI What on earth do they call that strange looking stone animal over there?
TWANKEY Sphinx
WISHEE Yeah – it is a bit smelly!
TWANKEY Aladdin, are you sure we’re heading in the right direction?
ALADDIN The slave said to turn right at the oasis and follow the map …
CHI KI (leaning on Wishee) Oh … I’m so hot …
WISHEE I do have that effect on women! (Chi-Ki hits him affectionately)
CHI KI You fool – you know what I mean …
ALADDIN Get a room you two … it can’t be far now …
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TWANKEY Let’s have another look at the enormous map …
(Aladdin unfolds an enormous map. Printed on the audience side is “This Is An Enormous Map”. The
map is so big that we can hardly see any of them behind it)
ALADDIN We can’t be far away. See? The map shows that sand dune over there (they all look
and agree) … so we must be here …
TWANKEY You mean here … where it says “Beware of Mummy’s”?
ALADDIN Yes
(They all look around but can see nothing)
WISHEE (scared) Mummy ….
ALL Argh! Where! Don’t let it get me etc!
WISHEE No … (to Twankey) I meant YOU Mummy …. I need to go … you know … (He starts
hopping about … he needs to pee!)
TWANKEY Don’t be so silly – you’re dehydrated so you can’t possibly need to go …
WISHEE But what if something scary happens … that might make me … you know …
CHI KI Look – if anything scary happens – I’m sure all the Princes and Princesses would let
us know …. (to audience) … you’d shout out very loudly if something was sneaking
up on us wouldn’t you?
AUDIENCE Yes!
ALADDIN Are you sure?
AUDIENCE Yes!
TWANKEY Are you surely sure?
AUDIENCE YES!
CHI KI Look … why don’t we sing a song to keep our spirits up?
TWANKEY Good idea … (to band) … take it away!
SONG: Mummy, Mummy, Mummy! – Twankey, Wishee, Aladdin, Chi-Ki, Li-Chi
(The main characters line up on the stage. As they sing the song, a Mummy appears behind them
and then walks straight off. Audience will be screaming!)
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ALADDIN What was it?
AUDIENCE A MUMMY!
WISHEE A mummy?
AUDIENCE YES!
CHI-KI Are you sure?
AUDIENCE YES!
TWANKEY Then why didn’t you tell us?
AUDIENCE WE DID!
ALL Oh no you didn’t!
AUDIENCE OH YES WE DID!
ALL Oh no you didn’t!
AUDIENCE OH YES WE DID!
ALL Didn’t, didn’t, didn’t
AUDIENCE DID, DID, DID!
ALADDIN Well – next time can you do it louder?
TWANKEY It’s no use ….
ALL … we’ll have to sing it again then!
(They do! This time the Mummy comes on and taps Li-Chi on its wing and roars … Li Chi runs off.
Repeat the routine. On the next occasion, the Mummy taps Aladdin on the shoulder and roars …
Aladdin runs off. On the next repeat, the Mummy taps and roars at Wishee and Chi-Ki who run off
together … leaving just Twankey. On the final occasion ... the Mummy taps and roars Twankey)
TWANKEY Oh hello! Give us a hug!
(The Mummy screams and runs away!)
TWANKEY How rude! Never mind – I’d better go and catch up with the others … which way
did they go? (Twankey reacts to audience and then runs off)
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Act Two: Scene 5 - Abanazars Lair
(As per the earlier scene... Abanazar is seated on his throne … two slave girls are fanning him. Jasmine is tied to a chair). The mummy runs across the stage screaming and looking behind …
ABANAZAR Curses! The Mummy Returns! What is happening?
(Guards enter) GUARD 1 Sir! Strangers have been spotted approaching the Palace ABANAZAR Strangers? GUARD 2 Yes Sir, A strange looking women riding a camel, a pretty lady, a sleepy idiot, a
large duck and a handsome young man. JASMINE Aladdin! He will save me. ABANAZAR That’s what you think! But how did they get past the Mummy? I don’t
understand? It has the strength of ten men. Guards, untie the girl and take her to the Palace dungeons.
GUARDS Yes Sir! (they untie Jasmine and take her off) ABANAZAR I’ll set the trap, I’ll catch those drips. And as for Jasmine, she’ll have her chips. (Abanazar exits as Aladdin enters) ALADDIN Here at last! (looking around) The coast is clear … (calling out) Come on you lot! (Wishee, Chi–ki and Li-Chi enter wearing sun glasses etc)) WISHEE Come on Mum! TWANKEY (enters bandy legged … hardly being able to walk.) That’s the most uncomfortable
ride I’ve ever had. WISHEE Well I don’t suppose the camel was too excited about it! Hey Mum … what do you
call a camel with no hump? TWANKEY I don’t know … WISHEE Humpfrey! Get it? Hump-free! ALADDIN Come on you two. We must find Jasmine before it’s too late. WISHEE It’s really dark in here. I can’t see a thing.
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ALADDIN Try taking your sun glasses off, bird brain. WISHEE (removing sunglasses) Oh yes, silly me! (He also removes Li-Chi’s glasses) TWANKEY (pointing at audience) Hey everyone, look what I have found. CHI-KI What is it? TWANKEY It’s one of the seven wonders of the modern world. A theatre full of people. ALADDIN I recognise this lot. They’re the Princes and Princesses we saw back in China! (To
audience) Maybe you can help us. Do you know where Princess Jasmine is? AUDIENCE Yes! ALADDIN Where is she? (audience replies) WISHEE What’s that? In the dungeons? ALADDIN Thanks very much everybody. I will go and look for her. You lot stay here and keep
your eyes open. (Aladdin exits as Wishee falls asleep and snores) AUDIENCE Wakey wakey Wishee Washee! CHI-KI Wishee, you heard what Aladdin said … keep your eyes open. WISHEE I know, but we’ve been walking for miles through that desert, I’m so tired. TWANKEY I didn’t like the insects. I was bitten by the Tstse Tstse. WISHEE Where? TWANKEY On my footsie wootsie. (Abanazar enters) ABANAZAR Well, well. What a pleasant surprise. Welcome to my Palace. (Cackling and
rubbing his hands together) You seem to be one member of your group missing? TWANKEY Yes – Aladdin has gone to rescue Jasmine from your dungeon so we’ll soon wipe
that smile from your face ABANAZAR Oh really? WISHEE/CHI-KI Yes, really! ABANAZAR I’m afraid your little plan has failed (claps hands and guards appear with Aladdin
as a prisoner). You see … your little boy is now my prisoner (evil laugh) ALADDIN If I get my hands on you …
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ABANAZAR FOOLS! IDIOTS! You have forgotten that I still have the magic lamp! WISHEE Excuse me sir. But what is your favourite Chinese food? ABANAZAR Why … a number 43 with rice? CHI-KI And that is …? ABANAZAR Peking duck with plum sauce! WISHEE Hear that Li-Chi? ALL GET HIM! (Li-Chi lunges at Abanazar, pecking him ferociously. Abanazar drops the lamp and ends up slumped across his throne) ALL Hurray! We’ve got him! Well done Li-Chi etc (Li-Chi threatens the guards who release Aladdin and exit. Aladdin grabs the lamp and rubs it and Genie appears in a flash) GENIE Another day and another master? My head is spinning faster and faster So young man what do you demand? You know your wish is my command! ALADDIN Release Jasmine and bring her here … GENIE As you ask master! (he performs a mysterious magic gesture and Jasmine appears
in a puff of smoke. She runs immediately to Aladdin) JASMINE Oh Aladdin! I always knew you would rescue me! ALADDIN Are you OK? Did he hurt you at all? JASMINE I’m fine … (she notices the others) Oh thank you for rescuing me … (she looks
around) … Is my mother not with you? (Empress, Vizier and Police enter) EMPRESS Jasmine! JASMINE Mummy! (they hug) TWANKEY (to Vizier and Police) What took you so long? CHOP CHOP It was his fault (pointing to Vizier) NA-NA It turns out he’s allergic to sand!
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VIZIER Ah … ah … ah … CHOO! (A monster sneeze, the audience get gently sprayed with water from Super Soakers from the balcony. STAGE CREW PLEASE NOTE: This is a gentle spray – not a full blown aqua attack!).
ALL BLESS YOU! VIZIER Thank you! CHOP CHOP That reminds me of a little story! NA-NA Me too! We had a little bunny CHOP CHOP Whose nose was rather runny NA-NA Some people thought it funny … CHOP/NA-NA But it’s not (“it’s snot”) ABANAZAR (coughs loudly) Excuse me! I am the villain of the piece and you seem to have
forgotten me ALADDIN We haven’t forgotten you at all. TWANKEY What shall we do with him? CHI-KI Tickle him to death? WISHEE We could always chuck him in the river? That should make him clean up his act! TWANKEY That’s no good … he’d still be in denial … “in de Nile” … get it? ALADDIN No! There is only one real choice. Genie! Destroy him! GENIE Alas my powers aren’t strong enough To destroy his evil man I’d need more help to complete this task … So help me if you can? JASMINE But how? EMPRESS You still have the magic ring don’t you? Why not summon the slave? ALADDIN Great idea! Go on Jasmine … just rub it! (She does and the Slave enters) SLAVE This had better be important … it’s my day off! (Sees Genie). Ooh (seductively) …
we haven’t been introduced …. TWANKEY Easy tiger!
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GENIE Calm down girl, I need your help Do you know a magic trick? SLAVE Well sure, big boy, and together we Can destroy this evil …. Man GENIE/SLAVE Abanazar always wanted to be Surrounded by jewels and monies Let’s send him to his cave - but seal it up So we call upon the help of the Mummy’s ABANAZAR No! Anything but the Mummy’s! (Two mummy’s appear and drag Abanazar off screaming!) ALADDIN And that’s the end of him! ALL Cheering etc JASMINE So what happens now? EMPRESS I think it’s time to head back to Peking and prepare for your wedding! ALADDIN (hugs Jasmine). Come on Princess – nothing can stop us now!
SONG: Don’t Stop me Now - Aladdin, Jasmine, Twankey, Wishee, Chi-Ki, Empress, Vizier, Chop
Chop, Na-Na
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Act Two: Scene 6 - Yet another street in Old Peking …. Or is it the same one again?
(Genie & slave enter … still holding hands … Genie looks a little uncomfortable)
SLAVE So … what happens now Big Boy? Will you be returning to your lamp?
GENIE I guess so …. Why?
SLAVE Well .. I was just wondering … if there may be room for two?
GENIE (Gulps) Two?!
SLAVE It’s just that I get so lonely … living in that ring all by myself … I just thought ….
GENIE You do realise that giving up the ring means you will lose your magic powers?
SLAVE Some things are worth giving up … for the right reason …
GENIE (Gulps hard) Oh … what the heck! Being stuffed into that lamp all alone for 3000
years … never knowing who is going to rub you … maybe it IS time for a change!
You’re on!
SLAVE Oh Genie! (They kiss!)
(Aladdin, Jasmine, Empress and Vizier enter)
ALADDIN Hey! What’s going on with you two?
GENIE We’re joining in with the romance theme!
SLAVE Yes – we’re going to get married too!
JASMINE Wow – that’s wonderful news!
ALADDIN (To Genie) You do realise that you’ve stopped all your rapping and rhyming?
GENIE Like the lady says … some things are worth giving up!
ALL Aaahh!!
EMPRESS You know, Vizier …
VIZIER (Excitedly!) Yes … yes … YES! (he fist pumps!)
EMPRESS Yes … what?
VIZIER Erm .. sorry .. I just thought that … with them (Aladdin and Jasmine) … erm .. and
them (Genie & Slave) … you might mean … erm … that you and I ….?
EMPRESS Don’t be ridiculous!
VIZIER (sadly) Yes … of course … your Highness …
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EMPRESS We need to finalise the wedding arrangements! Come on … chop chop!
(All look at Chop Chop expectantly. He doesn’t move but is gazing at Na-Na)
VIZIER Ahem … she said “Chop Chop”!
(Chop Chop drops down on one knee)
NA-NA (excitedly) Oh yes! This is so sudden … but yes!
CHOP CHOP (obviously tying his shoelaces) What are you on about?
NA-NA (sadly) Oh … nothing
CHOP CHOP (standing) Come on – we need to get to the station
NA-NA Why? What time does the train leave?
CHOP CHOP The Police Station, you ‘nana!
NA-NA Yep! That’s me!
(They exit …. Chi Ki, Wishee, Li-Chi and Twankey enter)
WISHEE It’s really great to be back home again!
TWANKEY You can say that again!
WISHEE OK. It’s really great to be back home again!
TWANKEY Thank you Wishee … I’m the comedian around here!
CHI-KI (looking at Wishee who has started playing with his duck). Well … Wishee?
(Wishee pretends to make a big yawn … he knows what is coming! He starts to fall asleep)
CHI-KI Oh no you don’t … come on boys and girls!
AUDIENCE Wakey wakey Wishee Washee!
WISHEE (to audience) Thanks a bunch - NOT!
CHI-KI Wishee Washee Twankey! You’re not getting out of this quite so lightly!
WISHEE Well … you see … it’s Li-Chi …
CHI-KI (arms folded, foot tapping) You’re putting your pet duck ahead of me?
WISHEE No … it’s just that she’s got no-one else …
Chi-Ki You’ll have to take her up to the Wood Green Animal Shelter …
WISHEE No! Mum … couldn’t she stay with you in the house?
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TWANKEY I don’t know … I mean … what about the smell?
WISHEE Oh she’ll soon get used to it!
CHI-KI What do you think Mrs Twankey?
TWANKEY I don’t know … (to audience) … what do you think? Should I let Li-Chi live with me?
AUDIENCE Yes!
(Wishee looks towards Li-Chi … Li-Chi waves her wings as if to say “go on then”)
WISHEE It’s a deal! (they kiss)
JASMINE … and what about you Mrs Twankey?
TWANKEY Me … oh I’ll be fine (she sniffs) …
ALADDIN Are you sure Mum?
TWANKEY As long as my family is happy … I’m happy too (she sniffs again and blows into a
hanky … she’s close to tears). (To audience) Providing, of course, that you lot have
had a good time … have you?
AUDIENCE (hopefully!) YES!
TWANKEY (cheering up) Excellent! Right .. Wishee … Li-Chi … you’re going to help me sing a
song with all the Princes and Princesses while the rest of you go and get ready for
the wedding!
(All except Twankey, Wishee and Li-Chi exit)
WISHEE But Mum … I’m absolutely cream crackered …. Erm … tired. We must have walked
500 miles or more …
TWANKEY What a coincidence! There’s a cue for a song if ever I heard one!
AUDIENCE SONG: 500 Miles – Twankey, Wishee, Li-Chi & Audience
(Wishee leads the final verse with the audience and then falls asleep)
AUDIENCE Wakey wakey Wishee Washee!
WISHEE Thanks everyone! Crikey! Look at the time! I’d better get ready for the wedding!
Bye!
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Act Two: Scene 7 The Wedding at the Royal Palace
Production Number and Walkdown …
SONG: “Old Peking” Reprise For Walkdown - All
VIZIER This was a tale of days gone by
EMPRESS Where secret caves hid many a gem
GENIE/SLAVE When magic beings ruled the world
TWANKEY And Peking was full of gorgeous men!
ALADDIN When rubbing lamps would bring good luck
CHI-KI And your help means goodness won
WISHEE When man’s best friend was his Peking Duck
JASMINE And now our story is almost done …
CHOP CHOP Abanazar got his just desserts
ABANAZAR I may be down but I’m feeling fine…
NA-NA The Mummies got him where it really hurts!
ABANAZAR … but I’ll be back again next time (evil cackle)
ALADDIN Our thanks to you for coming out
Whether you came from far or near
All that remains is for us to wish you all
ALL A HAPPY NEW YEAR!
END OF SHOW SPEECHES AND THANK YOU’S
SONG: Footloose! - All