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A skydiver drifted over a hundred miles off course and landedin a dense forest. Strung up in the tree, tangled, and terrifiedthat the night was fast approaching he began to yell out forhelp. After a few minutes, a man out for a walk chanced uponthe skydiver.Hello! I need help! called the man in the tree.Yes, I can see that. Youre stuck in a tree, with no way out,surrounded by a forest, and its getting quite dark. The otherman replied.Of all my luck, said the skydiver to him, I get stuck with aclergymen as a rescuer. Hearing this the passer by wonderedaloud how the distressed man had known his occupation as areligious teacher.WellI just assumed you must be a clergy, as what youvesaid is equally true, and absolutely useless in helping me

Ive told this story to many of my friends who are professional clergy.They usually get a kick out of itin part because they accept it ageneralized truism. So much of the faith discourse, while perhapsgood and even spot on, is often devoid of practical impact. Its notonly Christianity, or religion, that gets targeted by this critiquemost academic or philosophic movements struggle to have realgrounded applications. This is no more relevant than when it comesto the topic of being changedof being transformed.

Many of us hope for change to happenwe know that what weredoing simply isnt working; we understand that something is brokenand cannot continue. We wish for more meaningful or mendedrelationships with those around us. We struggle to live an active life,reconnected with our environment. We hope to be authentic, torepresent ourselves as we arenot falsely. And we long to unitewith a sense of greater meaning, a Higher Power, God, or faith. Yetin spite of these desires most such intentions fall the to the wayside,swept away under the tide of the urgent and immediate. Its not forlack of yearningit is the absence of grounded pragmatics. What isneeded, desperately, is a technology of transformation.

Below, Im going to be laying out practical steps towards that end.Change. Some will address seemingly mundane realties; others takeon the man behind the curtain. Some may be instantly relevant toyou, others you might need to stuff in your back pocket for another

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time. But, if you long to sense something more being birthed inyour lifestay tuned.

Ten Steps Towards Transformation

1. Practice Gratitude. This is different than being grateful, orknowing the importance of gratitude in general. It is aboutfinding and implementing specific tools in thankfulness. Atthis point, most of us know how significant gratitude isIdont need to convince you. Choose a practice.

2. Find a flesh and blood group of peers who you can dialogwith. I prefer faith communities. Though not without theirperils, they assume deeper meaning in the universe andattempt to process the challenges of living through thatunderstand. This lends itself to hope, and perseverance.Sometimesespecially in the storm, that is everything youneed to make it through. You dont need to agree witheverything they say or think or do. You simply need them. Goout, meet your neighbors, invest at a local club, try a church orsynagogue or mosque. Find fellowship with those around you.

3. Choose one thing to be consistent about, and live it. Abeachhead of just one disciplined action will create a pathwayin your mind, allowing you to do this more often. I can recall atime in my life in which I wanted to lose weight, but failed tohave the discipline to do so. That year I chose to also wake upat 5am to meditate. I believe the act of choosing to stick withone, aided the other. In the end I lost 50 pounds, and was farmore centered than when I started. It forever taught me thislesson.

4. Routinely ask yourself Who am I? Its an endless rabbithole. Am I my name? No, that is simply a wordI would beme, even without that name. Am I my job? No, at this pointIve been through enough careers to know that this too does notdefine me. Am I those I am in relationship to? Perhapsandcertainly I am shaped by them. And yet, there does seem to bea consistent core that moves from relationship to relationship.So noetcetc..etc.. You get the point. This is a powerfulspiritual practice if you give yourself to it. Of course a verysimilar exercise is asking Who is God? Now theres aterrifying question. Try coming to the end of that path.

5. Read poetry. Buy a book of poetry and read it, daily, aloud.This is one of the most transformative acts you can engage in

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for your soul. The process of poetics short circuits the detailedmonologues we have running at any given time in our heads.In destitute times we need poetry to hint at the traces offugitive gods and hidden realities. Try reading Rilke, MaryOliver, Pablo Neruda, William Blake, Hafiz, or Rumi. These

will keep you busy for a while.6. Pay attention. Start with keeping a journal. Even a few simple

notes to remind yourself of what happened, what wasmeaningful, what you felt, what was said, and how youconnected the dots. This process continues into a moment bymoment mental note takingnoticing what is happening.Becoming aware is the process of dropping the unhelpfulprogramming we assume is us, but really is simplysomething that has been downloaded to our systems. By seeingourselves and our lives through a compassionate, non-

judgmental space, we allow for the opportunity to live joyfullyand free.

7. Discover prayer. By prayer I mean contact with God. Thiscomes in many forms, but it is always intentional. Whether it ismeditation, contemplation, verbal, or any other strain of prayerthey are all a conscious act of the will. There are some who willsay that we should simply exist with the idea of Gods presencesurrounding usrather than strive to have contact. I dontdisagree that God is the very fabric of the universe. God doesnot simply exist, God is existence. And yeta dinner guestpresent at my table will have been ignored if I fail to directlyengage them. God is no different in this aspect. We can ignorethe reality of Gods presence. All forms of prayer are a type ofnarrowing of focus (some are more effective than others) inorder to make contact with that reality. It will, quite simply,shift your vantage point.

8. Savor everything. Drink your coffee; dont gulp it. Taste thewine. Spend the next two hours making an exquisite mealitdoesnt have to be expensive, only care-full. Fail to stifle thelaugh that bubbles up from your gut to your throat. Laughloudly whenever appropriate (and sometimes when not). Cryopenly. Be where you are in each instance you are there. Inpart this means, to those of us who glance routinely at ourphones, silencing, turning off, or taking a fast from technologyfrom time to time. Allow nothing to distract you fromattending to the sacred of this present moment.

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9. Make it a priority to (re)connect with those who love you.There is nothing so transformative as being in relationship withpeople who will truly care for you and whom you can care for.Mostly we judge the relationships that we are willing to spendtime investing in by how good they feel at the time. This is a

poor way to judge growth. Allow some degree of history todirect your course. For many of us, our family have been thereonceinvite them to be again. Dear friends weve held andperhaps lost along the way also can be re-engaged. It is achoice, permission given, to permit others to attend to our lives.There are perilsyet the promise is great also. Commit tothose who will speak truly and lovingly, give yourselfunreservedly to those relationships and see how they transformyou.

10. Love. To receive love is to have given love. Love begins withkindness, a choice. Take out your neighbors garbage. Mowtheir lawn. Invite them over for dinner. Kiss your spouse whenyou wake up in the morning. Change a dirty diaper. Hire amaid as a surprise, or clean the house yourself. Choose torespond with empathy when you have none. Say the hardword when it matters and you must. Take your children out ondates. Surprise your parents with a visit. Come home earlyfrom work. If someone notices something of yours they think isspecial or amazing or of note, give it to them. Listen to thestories of others. Ask questions about someone else life. Andof course, though often missed, have compassion on yourself.All love of God and neighbor flows from a love of self.