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TRANSCRIPT
1Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Fawlty Towers
Episode 5 – The Germans
Basil Fawlty: So you’re, __________________________________________?
Sybil Fawlty: What, Basil?
Bas: I said, _________________________________________?
Syb: Will you get me my bed jacket?
Bas: Er, _______________________-
Syb: _____________________, ___________________ – _____________________!
Bas: Oh!
Syb: Now you won’t forget the fire drill tomorrow, will you?
Bas: No, I won’t, dear, no – I can cope, you know! This one?
Syb: __________________________!
Bas: ____________________________________________!
Syb: ____________________________, and ___________________________
_____________________________, did I?
Bas: No, you didn’t – quite right – no, I only picked that one up to annoy you, actually! I
mean, what have you _____________________________________?
Syb: ________________?
Bas: I mean ____________________________________ – are you going to play charades
_________________? _______________?
Syb: _______________________?
Bas: Well ____________________, ___________________!
Syb: Now you will remember to collect the stuff from Thomas’s, won’t you?
Bas: Yes, _______________!
Syb: Oh, and I forgot to scrape the mould off the Cheddar this morning, so remind Chef,
will you?
Bas: ______________!
Syb: And do _____________________________ to get the moose’s head up!
Bas: Oh!
Syb: ___________________________________________________, Basil!
Bas: Yes, yes, yes!
2Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Syb: _________________________________________!
Bas: It will lend the lobby a certain ambience, Sybil! ______________________
______________________________!
Syb: It’s got a touch of mange about it!
Bas: ____________________!
Syb: _____________________________________, Basil – _______________________!
Bas: _____________________, _______________________!
Syb: __________________________________________, Basil – __________________
____________________ – I don’t want to snag any more cardies on it – and will you
________________________________, please?
Bas: I mean it’s not as if I don’t have enough to do – I mean, I’m on my own, the Germans
are arriving tomorrow-
Syb: _______________________ – __________________________________!
Bas: I’ve got the fire drill in the morning!
Syb: Well __________________________________ – ___________________!
Bas: Oh – I thought slavery had been abolished – oh-
Syb: ___________________________________________________________?
Bas: Oh!
Syb: ___________________!
Bas: Oh, yes - ________________ – yes, yes, let me do it – you just lie there __________
_______________________ and I’ll just go and carry you up another hundredweight
of lime creams!
Syb: ______________________________ undergo an operation, Basil!
Bas: Oh, yes – _______________________________? Still growing in, mm? Still
burrowing its way down to the bone – still macheteing its way its way through the
nerve, eh? _____________________________!
Syb: _______________________, if _____________________________, Basil!
Bas: Well, _________________________________, poor little devil! Wonder if they’d
mount it for me, just for old times’ sake?
Syb: I’m sure it’s worth asking – _________________________________, ___________
______________ – _________________________________________________!
Bas: Ha, ha, ha!
Sister: Ah, _________________ – ____________________, ____________________!
3Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Bas: Oh, have you been talking to me? I’m sorry, ____________________________
__________!
Sis: Oh, no – ________________________!
Bas: I wouldn’t bet on it!
Sis: Oh, no – ____________________! Now _______________ –
___________________!
Bas: Er, Fawlty’s the name – __________________________!
Sis: ________________________________!
Syb: ____________________, Sister!
Sis: Now – ______________________________________! ______________________?
Bas: _____________________!
Sis: __________________________________!
Bas: My God! ________________ – I mean, ________________________________?
Whatever can we do about it?
Sis: ________________________!
Bas: _________________________________________? Is it a term of endearment?
Syb: (still with thermometer in her mouth) Basil!
Sis: Now look, Mr Fawlty, ______________________________________________!
Bas: Presumably you wouldn’t mind if _____________________________________?
_________________________________________!
Sis: _______________________________________!
Bas: Oh, you know, do you? Well, that’ll help! Well dear, just take, take, take care now,
and if you can think of __________________________________________,
__________________________________!
Syb: No, no, I won’t!
Sis: __________________?
Bas: ___________ – _____________________________!
Sis: ________________!
Bas: ________________________ – _______________________________, ___________
_________ – ________________________________________! Bye bye, dear!
Doctor Fin: Mr Fawlty?
Bas: Yes?
Fin: Doctor Fin!
4Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Bas: Ah – oh, how, _____________________, Doctor?
Fin: __________________________________?
Bas: Yes, yes – ______________________ – well, au revoir!
Fin: Yes – well, __________________________________, but _________________
_________________________________!
Bas: ___________? ___________? ____________!
Fin: ________________________ – but please, ________________!
Bas: Yeah well – I’ll, __________________! Quite er, _____________________?
Fin: Yes!
Bas: _____________, Major!
Major Gowen: _______________, Fawlty! Hampshire won!
Bas: Did it? Oh, ______________________ – ________________________!
Maj: Oh, Fawlty – erm er, how’s, how’s the erm, er, erm, er-
Bas: ________________?
Maj: ________________!
Maj: ___________, _______________________ – __________________________
_______________________________!
Maj: Is she? _____________!
Bas: No, not her – _______________! They won’t have operated till tomorrow!
Maj: __________?
Bas: _____________ – __________________________________!
Maj: Well how, ___________________________________?
Bas: Oh, I thought I’d told you, Major –
________________________________________!
Maj: What, __________________________?
Bas: Well __________________________________, Major!
Maj: Oh, well, ___________________________________, you have it out!
Bas: Exactly! So, I’m on my own now – start ____________________________
_________________!
Maj: Ah, so you’re on your own, are you?
Bas: __________________, yes!
Maj: Oh, ________________________________, will she?
Bas: No, no – no, no – ________________________________________________!
5Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Maj: Well you’ve always got Elsie to help you!
Bas: ____________?
Maj: Elsie!
Bas: Well she er, _____________________________________, Major!
Maj: Funny – ____________________________________________!
Bas: No, I don’t think so – _________________________!
Maj: _____________________________, women!
Bas: Well, _______________________________________!
Maj: _______________________ – nice looking girl – ________, _____________! Father
was a banker!
Bas: _______________?
Maj: ____________________________________________!
Bas: Well _____________________!
Maj: I, I, I must have been keen on her because er, because _________________________
er, ______________!
Bas: _______________?
Maj: At the Oval! Fine match – _______________________________! Now Surrey had to
get 33 in about _________________, and she went off to er, _______________
______, ____________________________________________ – women are, are –
________________________!
Bas: _____________________!
Maj: And _________________________ that throughout the morning, __________
________________________________ as niggers! No, no, no, no, no, I said –
niggers are the West Indians – these people are wogs! No, no, no, no, she said –
______
____________________ are niggers!
Bas: _______________________________________, don’t they – they’re not thinkers – I
see it with Sybil every day!
Maj: I, _____________________________________________ – _________________
___________________________!
Bas: As I was saying – no capacity for __________________________!
Maj: __________?
Bas: ________________!
Maj: Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes – ________________________________________!
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Bas: No, no, no, no, no – wasn’t it Oscar Wilde who said they had minds like Swiss
cheese?
Maj: _________________________ – halved?
Bas: No – __________________________!
Maj: Really? _________________?
Bas: No, no – ______________!
Maj: Oh!
Bas: Yes? _______________________?
Polly Sherman: Hello!
Bas: You see? _____________________________, she doesn’t know the time of day!
Maj: Oh, it’s er, about, about _____________________________!
Bas: Well __________________________________?
Polly: ____________________________!
Bas: Oh, we’ve got _________________________________________________
_______________, Major! Yes, so, er, Polly’s _____________________
_____________________________________!
Maj: Ger- Germans? _____________________?
Bas: Oh, er, __________________________________, Major!
Maj: I, I, __________________________________________!
Bas: Well, _____________________________, but er-
Maj: Bunch of cads, that’s what they are! All of them! Bad eggs!
Bas: Well you know, ____________________________________, Major, I mean, er –
God knows how, the bastards, still- I’d er, I’d better put the moose up!
Maj: Well you’ve got to love ’em, I suppose, haven’t you?
Bas: __________________?
Maj: No, no, no, no – ______________! __________________________ -
____________________!
Polly: _________________________________?
Maj: _______________________________! Well, well mind - I wouldn’t give them time
of day!
Polly: ______________________!
Bas: _____________________________________________________________!
Polly: Well they said ____________________________________________!
7Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Bas: Well _______________________________, isn’t it?
Bas: I don’t know why she’s got to __________________________________! Ah – got
her cardy, did you?
Maj: By Jove – ha, ha, ha - ____________________________, Fawlty!
Bas: ___________?
Maj: Yes, well, when, _____________________ – er, might have er, _________________
______________________________!
Bas: Yes, well, I’ll open up the moment I’ve done this, Major, yes!
Maj: No, no, _______________________________!
Bas: Drunken old sod! Polly! Polly! Oh! Manuel! Oh! Yes – Fawlty Towers – hello! I was
just doing it, _________________________! I just put it down to come here to be
reminded by you to do what I’m already doing! I mean, what is the point of
_____________________________________________________________? I mean,
what is the bloody point? I’m doing it, aren’t I? Yes, yes, _____________________,
yes! No, no, I haven’t had a chance yet – I’ve been at it solidly ever since I got back!
Yes, I will, yes – no, _______________________, but I will, yes! Yes, yes, I know it
is – yes, I’ll try and get it cleared up! ________________________? I mean, would
you like the hotel ____________________________________, or- Yes, well, enjoy
the operation, dear – __________________________________!
__________________
___________________________!
Manuel: Yes!
Bas: Oh – it’s the admirable Crichton! Well?
Man: ________________, sir!
Bas: __________________, but not to worry!
Man: Qué?
Bas: Oh, Buddha! Look, er - __________________________________!
Man: Er, cómo?
Bas: __________________!
Man: __________________ – oh, hama sandwich!
Bas: Oh, do I have to go through this every time? Look – __________________!
Man: _______________________?
Bas: No, _____________________________ – how can I knock a nail in ______________
8Fawlty Towers Episode 6
______________? Well I could try- No, it doesn’t matter – oh, all right, I’ll get it –
you come here and tidy! ______________ – ____________?
Man: Oh, _____________ – sí, sí!
Bas: I’ll get a hammer and _____________________________ with it!
Man: Hammer, hammer – how are you, sir? _______________, __________________
_______________________ – ______________________________________! Hello
– _______________________ – hallo! ________________, _____? __________
_________________! Ahem – ah, hello, Major – _______________________?
Maj: Ah, ah, ah, ah – I, I, I, ________________, thank you!
Man: _____________________________________!
Maj: Is it? Oh, I- Yes, yes, __________________________!
Man: Yes – __________________________! _______________________________!
Maj: _____________? _____________________? Oh, ______________________,
Fawlty!
Bas: Yes – _________________________________, Major!
Maj: Oh, fine! I say, that’s a, that’s a remarkable animal you have there, Fawlty – er,
_____________________________?
Bas: Er, Sampson’s – __________________!
Maj: Really? Was, _____________________________?
Bas: Er – ______________________, __________________!
Maj: Good Lord! ___________________, ______________?
Bas: __________________, ________________, Major!
Maj: Oh, er, I didn’t know the Canadians were __________________________! My God!
Bas: __________________________! Hah! Polly – ________________________?
Polly: _______________ – ____________________________________________!
Bas: Well what are you ________________________________________________?
_____________________________________?
Polly: __________________________!
Bas: Oh, ________________________________, please? I’m trying to put this up!
Polly: Fawlty Towers! Oh, hello, Mrs Fawlty!
Bas: __________________ – _________________________ – _________________
_________________________!
9Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Polly: _______________________________! ______________________?
Bas: ______________________________! There – tell the tyrant queen her cardies are
safe for ever – Mr Moose is up! ______________, _______, _______!
Polly: ____________! _________________! Did you use a wall plug?
Bas: ______________________ – give it to- Aargh!
Polly: No, ______________________________________, and he seems to have got himself
jammed in the swivel chair – and __________________________________________
___________! No, _________________________________!
Bas: Ah! Right!
Man: Is up – good – up – up - easy! Very good!
Bas: Right! Good!
Man: Is good! Is good!
Bas: Oh, what is- Oh! Right - well go on, ___________________________________!
Man: Oh, sí, sí, I go back-
Bas: ____________________! Hah! _____________________!
Mr Sharp: ______________________!
Bas: Er, you know ______________________________________________, do you?
Sha: No, er, no we didn’t!
Bas: __________________________________________?
Sha: No!
Bas: Right, well _______________________________, if you’d be so kind as to get out
for a few moments – _____________________________________! Thank you so
much!
Sha: Oh!
Polly: Mr Fawlty, _________________________________________?
Bas: Yes?
Polly: Well ________________________!
Bas: Yes, ______________________________, you know - ____________________
________________ – I can cope! I mean, __________________________________,
do you?
Polly: __________________________________________________________________!
Bas: _________________________________________________________, yes!
Polly: Mr Fawlty?
10Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Bas: Yes?
Polly: _____________________________________________?
Bas: _________________ – ________________________________________!
Polly: Yes, but _____________________________________________!
Bas: _______?
Polly: Well _____________________________________________? ________________
_______________________________?
Bas: Well ___________________________________ when we come to it, shall we? I
mean, ________________________________? There’s always got to be an argument
about everything! Hello, Fawlty Towers! Oh, _____________________?
____________
________________________? Yes, yes, ____________________________________
– I hadn’t forgotten! Yes, I know, ____________________________________ – it’s
on the top of the- Well _________________? Well what did you put it in there for?
________________________________________, are they? Yes, yes, yes, _________
________________, ________________, do- Yes, yes, __________________ –
thank you so much! I mean, why has she got to complicate it?
____________________
_________, ______________________, so she has to come along and move the damn
thing ____________________________ – ___________________- Well what’s she
put that on for – oh, I might have guessed! Sorry, sorry, Major – only the burglar
alarm, ______________!
Maj: __________?
Bas: ______________, Miss Tibbs!
Miss Abitha Tibbs: ____________?
Bas: Er, _______________________________ – _________________________
_________________________ – sorry! _________________!
Maj: ________________, Fawlty?
Bas: No, no, er, my wife left the er- __________________!
Mrs Wilson: Yes?
Bas: Er, sorry, _________________________________ – sorry, that was just the er-
Wil: Well ______________________________!
Bas: Yes, ____________, ____________________, ______________!
Wil: ______________________________!
11Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Bas: Well _______________! _______________! ___________________!
Mrs Sharp: Yes?
Wil: Well ______________________________!
Bas: I’m afraid that wasn’t the er-
Wil: ________________________________, Major?
Bas: Look-
Maj: ________________________, I think!
Bas: ___________________________________________________, ______________
___________________!
Msha: _____________?
Bas: __________________________!
Msha: But _____________________________, wasn’t it?
Bas: _____!
Wil: __________________________________________________________!
Sha: What drill? ______________________________!
Bas: No, no, no – look, look! _________________________________!
Maj: ____________?
Wil: _______________________________?
Bas: Yes!
Wil: ______________________________?
Maj: _______________________!
Bas: Now look – what’s the matter with you all? ________________________________!
______________________________________________________________ – _____
_________________________, _____________?
Sha: Well ___________________________________ that wasn’t the fire bell?
Bas: __________________________________________________!
Guests: It did!
Bas: _______________!
Guests: It did!
Bas: _____________________! The fire bell has a different sound- _____________
_____________________________!
Wil: ___________________?
Bas: _________________! ________________, ____________________________
__________________________!
12Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Sha: ________________________!
Bas: Well it is now, but that’s because we’ve been standing about arguing about it!
Wil: Look – how on earth can you expect us to tell __________________________?
Bas: Oh!
Wil: _____________________________________, _______________?
Bas: You want to hear them? Right, suits me – __________________________________!
Maj: __________________________________________________?
Bas: ___________________________!
Maj: Then _________________________________________?
Bas: All right? Got that? Right!
Wil: ________________________________?
Bas: Now – here’s the fire bell! Right? _________________________________________
– listen! ______________________________?
Wil: Well, _____________________________, isn’t there?
Bas: No, no, no, no, no – this is so that __________________________ so you know in a
moment when _____________________! ________________________? _________
__________________?
Tibbs: ___________________________!
Bas: No, no, ___________________, _______________!
Tibbs: __________?
Bas: ____________________!
Man: Fire, fire! _____________________, please!
Bas: No!
Man: Out, please – out please!
Bas: ______________________?
Man: _________!
Bas: _______________________?
Man: The fire!
Bas: Is not fire, is only bell! _________________________?
Polly: _________________! There is no-
Bas: ____________________________ – ___________________________ what the bell
sounds like! Now will you go in there – go and help Chef!
Man: __________________!
Bas: Well go and, go and start the chips!
13Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Man: ______________?
Bas: Yes – ________________________, ____________!
Man: But what-
Bas: No fire – ____________________! Tell him, Polly! Thank you, thank you,
_________ ___________________ – ________________________!
Maj: _______________________________!
Wil: ______________________________?
Bas: Now- Yes, yes! Now, __________________________________ on what the fire bell
sounds like?
Guests: Yes!
Bas: __________________! Well now that’s settled, we’ll have the fire drill, which will
commence in _________________________________________! Thank you so
much! _____________________________? I mean,
_____________________________
_______________________?
Sha: Well, _____________________________?
Bas: Well couldn’t one or two of you go in the bar, and ____________________________
______________ – I mean, _____________________________?
Sha: Why?
Bas: Well _________________________________________________!
Sha: _________________________________________!
Bas: Right, right, well ________________________, ’cause obviously _____________
__________________, you’d all be standing down here like this in the lobby,
wouldn’t you? _______________________________?
________________________________!
Man: Oh, ugh, oh, no, no, no, no please! No, no, no, no! (anguished sounds) Fuego, fuego –
aquí, aquí! No, sí! Fire, fire, fuego, fuego, fuego, fuego, fuego! (screams)
Bas: No, no, ________________, Major – _____________________________________!
Tibbs: ______________________________!
Ursula Gatsby: Oh thank you, thank you so much!
Man: _______, _______, _______, _______!
Bas: No, no!
14Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Man: Yes, sí, sí!
Bas: Now listen - ______________________________________?
Man: (unintelligible)
Bas: _______________! I mean, _____________________________________!
Man: Mr Fawlty – is fire!
Bas: __________________________________?
Man: No, but is fire!
Bas: ______________ – ____________________!
Man: _____________ – ______________ – __________________! (unintelligible)
Bas: He thinks there’s a fire!
Polly: Everybody’s out upstairs! No, Manuel, listen – de nada, de nada – no, ____________
______________!
Man: Is fire! (unintelligible)
Bas: Well, that’ll ________________________________________ for another six months
– I mean, why do we bother? _________________________?
Bas: Thank you, ladies and gentlemen – _________________________________!
Guests: (unintelligible)
Polly: We’ve just had it!
Bas: _________________!
Polly: Yes – I will! Have you told Chef about the Cheddar?
Bas: Oh!
Wil: Mr Fawlty, Mr Fawlty!
Bas: Yes?
Wil: There’s an awful row in there!
Bas: Yes, I know it’s– right, right, ______________________! Thank you, thank you so
much for poking your nose in where it’s not wanted! If you don’t stop this-
Man: You save me!
Bas: Right, ladies and gentlemen, er, could I have everyone er, _________________
___________________? Sorry, sorry, sorry to disturb you like this, but there is
something that I think _____________________________ – erm, I’m not quite sure
how this er, happened, and er, it’s never happened in this hotel before, and _________
____________________________________-
Wil: _________________?
15Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Bas: Well, er, _____________________, erm, er, ___________________________ – erm,
hm, ______________!
Wil: ___________?
Bas: ___________ – f- f- f- f- ______________!
Sha: ____________?
Bas: ____________!
Sha: _____________?
Bas: There – fire! Fire! Fire! Fire! Fire! Fire! Fire! What the hell do I do – I’ll call Sybil!
Polly: _____________________!
Bas: ___________?
Polly: ____________________!
Bas: ______________________ – ____________ – ______________!
Man: Fire, Mr Fawlty!
Bas: _______________________? Where is the key – I mean, ________________
___________________, I mean, ________________________________? The first
time we’ve ever had a fire here in this hotel and ____________________________
____________! Oh, isn’t that typical of this place? Oh, thank you, God – __________
__________________________!
Polly: Smash the glass!
Bas: What?
Polly: Smash the glass!
Bas: Hello! Thank you, thank you! Right, right, man the door!
Man: (unintelligible)
Bas: Quick – Manuel, Manuel – pull, pull man, pull! Right, _____________________!
Man: Yes, yes, sí!
Bas: (mumbles) What a way to-
Syb: Well – ______________________________________________!
Bas: Ah, _______________ – I was just er-
Syb: __________________________?
Bas: _______________!
Syb: It’s all-
Bas: _______________!
Syb: _______________ – there’s not much damage!
16Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Bas: Oh my God – where is it? Where are they?
Syb: _________________________?
Bas: ___________________________ – ______________________________!
Syb: Basil – _____________________________________?
Bas: (mumbles) Yes, __________________________?
Syb: ____________________________________ if you don’t get back into bed-
Bas: Listen, Sybil, please – _________________________, _____________________!
Now, _________________________________________?
Syb: Basil!
Bas: Oh, there you are – I can’t stand around chattering all day –
_____________________!
Syb: Basil, ___________________ – the doctor says you’ve got concussion –
___________
_______________!
Bas: ___________________________________________!
Syb: I’ve just spoken to Polly – ___________________________ perfectly well-
Bas: (unintelligible) Do you know what that fire extinguisher did – it exploded in my face,
I mean, ______________________________________________________? It sits
there for months, and when you actually have a fire, when you actually need the
bloody thing, it blows your head off! I mean, what is happening to this country? It’s
bloody Wilson!
Sis: What a lot of noise! Now ___________________________________________?
Bas: _________________________, ____________________________!
Sis: Yes, well we’ll let the doctor decide that now, shall we?
Bas: No, ______________________!
Sis: __________________________!
Bas: Don’t touch me – _______________________________________________!
Sis: Yes, yes – we must have our little jokes, mustn’t we?
Bas: Yes, ______________, _________________? My God, _____________________,
aren’t you? Mind boggling!
Syb: Basil!
Bas: Mm?
Sis: I’ll, ___________________________!
17Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Bas: You need a plastic surgeon, dear, ___________________________!
Syb: Basil, how dare you talk to Sister like that – get back into bed!
Bas: You don’t seem to realise that ___________________________________!
Syb: No, you’re not – __________________________________________________!
Bas: Polly cannot cope!
Syb: Well _____________________________________, or get herself jammed under
desks, or _________________________, or lock people in burning rooms, or fire fire
extinguishers straight in her own face, but I should think the hotel could do without
that sort of coping for a couple of days – what do you think, Basil, hmm?
Fin: ___________?
Bas: Oh, hello, Doctor!
Fin: __________________________, Mr Fawlty?
Bas: Ah, sort of- Oh, there they are! Well, ____________________________________ –
oh, feel a little bit woozy!
Fin: __________________________________, Mr Fawlty, _________________!
Bas: Yes – _____________, ________________!
Fin: You should get _______________________________ – ___________________
_______________ – _____________________________-
Bas: (yawns)
German Guest 1: Gnädiges Fräulein, können Sie mir sagen wann das Mittagessen serviert
wird, bitte?
Polly: Um ein Uhr – fünf Minuten!
GG1: Vielen Dank!
Polly: Bitte schön!
Bas: Manuel!
Man: Oh, oh, Mr Fawlty!
Bas: Ah, __________________________!
Tibbs: __________________________?
Bas: _________________, thank you! _____________________________, dear!
Gatsby: Are you sure you’re all right?
Bas: ________________, thank you! Right as rain!
Man: _________________?
18Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Bas: Fine, thank you, dear – _____________________________________!
Man: Qué?
Bas: Ah, ____________________! Will you take my case- How did you get that?
Man: What?
Bas: Oh, never mind – take it! ___________________________!
Man: Qué?
Bas: _______________ – ___________________!
Man: I, I go get Polly!
Bas: _______________________________ – _______________! ________________
_____! Cor – the people I have to deal with!
GG2: Sprechen Sie Deutsch?
Bas: _______________________________?
GG2: Entschuldigen Sie, bitte – können Sie Deutsch sprechen?
Bas: I’m sorry – ______________________________?
GG3: ________________________?
Bas: Oh, ______________! I’m sorry - _______________________________
____________________ – oh, of course – ah, hah, hah ha, you’re German!
GG3: ________________________?
Bas: Well, ________________ – I get by!
GG3: Ein bisschen!
GG2: Ah - wir wollen ein Auto mieten!
Bas: Well, ______________?
GG2: Bitte!
Bas: Yes, a little bit tricky – _________________________________________?
GG3: “_____________”!
Bas: A little? ________________________? Amplify – you know, reiterate? Yes, yes!
GG2: Wir-
Bas: “Wir” – yes, well, ________________________________!
GG2: Wollen –
Bas: “Wollen” – ____________________?
GG2: Ein Auto mieten!
Bas: “Out to” – “out to” – oh, I see – you’re volunteering ______________________
____________________! ________________________ – __________________
19Fawlty Towers Episode 6
________! “Vee haff meat here in ze building”! Ah, Polly –
_____________________
______________________!
Polly: Oh, _______________________________________!
Bas: Er, __________________? They’re Germans – ______________________________!
Polly: I see – well Mrs Fawlty said you were going ___________________
________________ – you know, in hospital!
Bas: Idle hands get in the way of the Devil’s work, Fawlty! Now-
Polly: Right - well why don’t you go and have a lie down, and __________________
________________!
Bas: Yes, yes – ________________ – Elsie – yes – ______________________, actually!
Tibbs: ______________________________, Mr Fawlty!
Bas: Well, perhaps not, but _____________________________________!
Gatsby: ___________________________________!
Bas: My dear woman, a blow on the head – like that – is worth two in the bush!
Tibbs: Oh, we know – but _________________________________________!
Bas: Mm – _______________________? Next, please! Ah, Polly – _________________
_______________________?
Polly: Oh, yes, but ________________________________________-
Bas: Right, right – ________________________ – I’ll stand there and ask them if they
want _________________________________________________________
– ____________________________! Don’t, don’t ___________________________!
GG4: ___________________________?
Bas: Oh, ____________________________?
GG4: ____________________!
Bas: Ah, ________________ – wunderbar! Ah! __________________________
___________________________ - I am the owner of Fawlty Towers! And may I
welcome your war – your war – your war – you all, you all, and hope that your stay
___________________________! Now – __________________________________,
or would you like a drink ____________________________ – ning that er,
trespassers will be er, er, tied up with piano wire! Sorry, sorry – oh, oh, trouble with
the old leg! Got, got, a touch of shrapnel in the war – Korean! Korean war – sorry,
Korean! Mm?
GG4: Thank you – _____________________________!
20Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Bas: Oh, good, please – _______________________ – may I say how pleased we are to
___________________________________, now that
_________________________?
Polly: _________________________ Dr Fin, please?
Bas: I didn’t vote for it myself, quite honestly, but now that we’re in I’m determined to
make it work, so ______________________________________________! The
plaice is grilled, but _______________________________ – there’s life in the old
thing yet – no, wait a moment – got a bit confused there – oh yes, the plaice is grilled
– in fact
__________________________________, isn’t it? I’ll open the window – ______
___________! And the veal chop is done with rosemary – ____________!
_________________________________________ – and is _________________,
_____________________! In fact, it’s veally good – veally good – ha, ha, ha, ha!
GG4: The veal is good?
Bas: Yes – ______________________, _______________________!
_______________________!
GG3: May we have two eggs mayonnaises, please?
Bas: Certainly – ____________, _______________________? _______________
_____________, eh?
GG4: A prawn cocktail!
Bas: All in the market together – old differences forgotten – and no need at all ____
___________________________! Sorry, sorry, sorry – what was that again?
GG4: _____________________________!
Bas: Oh, prawn – that was it – ________________ “_____________”,
__________________________“______”! Oh, yes, oh, the war – oh, yes –
completely slipped my mind – yes, _________________________________ – Hitler,
Himmler, and all that lot – oh, yes – _____________________________________ –
__________________________! Sorry – _________________________?
GG4: ____________________________!
Bas: Oh, yes, Eva Prawn, yes, yes, and Goebbels too, he’s another one ____________
_____________________________________-
GG3: And ein pickled herring!
21Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Bas: Hermann Goering, yes, yes, and er, von Ribbentrop,
___________________________!
GG4: And four cold meat salads, please!
Bas: Certainly – well, I’ll just get your – hors d’oeuvres – hors d’oeuvres - which must be
________________________________________________! Ha, ha, sorry! Sorry!
Polly: Mr Fawlty, _____________________________________________________?
Bas: Sybil! Sybil – _______________________________, _______________________!
Polly: Yes – ____________________________!
Bas: I can’t – I’ve got too much to do! Listen – don’t mention the war! ________
__________________________, but I think ______________________________
______________________!
Bas: So – it’s all forgotten now, and __________________________________________!
So, that’s two egg mayonnaises, a prawn Goebbels, a Hermann Goering and four
Colditz salads! No, wait a moment – I got a bit confused here – sorry, I got a bit
confused ’cause everyone keeps _________________________________, so could
you- What’s the matter?
GG4: _________________________!
Bas: _______________________________?
GG4: ____________________________________________?
Bas: Me? ______________________________!
GG4: __________________________________!
Bas: Yes you did – you invaded Poland! Here, here – blow that – here, this’ll cheer you up
– you’ll like this one – there’s this woman, __________________________________
– she can never remember anything – and then her husband’s in a bomber over Berlin
– oh, sorry, sorry – here, here, she’ll love this one – she’ll laugh at-
GG4: Leave her - _______________________!
Bas: No, this is a scream – I mean I’ve never seen anyone not laugh at this!
GG3: _________________!
Bas: Look, _________________ – ______________________!
Polly: No, Mr Fawlty!
Bas: ____________?
Polly: Do Jimmy Cagney instead!
22Fawlty Towers Episode 6
Bas: ____________?
Polly: Jimmy Cagney!
Bas: Jimmy Cagney?
Polly: _________________, “You dirty rat!”
Bas: _______________________________________________!
Polly: Oh, please try – “I’m going to get you”!
Bas: _____________! __________, _____________! ____________________?
(unintelligible) I’ll do the funny walk (unintelligible)
GG4: Stop it!
Bas: What?
GG3: Stop it!
Bas: ______________________________________, you stupid Kraut!
GG4: It’s not funny for her!
Bas: Not funny? Not funny? ________________________!
GG4: It’s not funny for her, not for us, not for ________________________________!
Bas: You have absolutely __________________________________, do you?
GG3: ________________________________!
Bas: _____________________________________________________?
Fin: Mr Fawlty – ____________________________! ______________________!
Bas: _________________!
Man: Oh, oh, _____________________________!
Maj: No, _____________________________! _______________________________!
GG4: ______________________________________?