‘yes, we have no bananas.’ at the farmers market, cambridge, fall, 2013. ‘our raspberries are...

7/27/2019 Yes, we have no bananas. At the farmers market, Cambridge, fall, 2013. Our raspberries are delicious. Very del

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Yes, we have no bananas. At the farmers market, Cambridge, fall, 2013. Our raspberriesare delicious. Very delicious.. But we have no bananas today.Shopping guide for the

Farmer's Market


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Preface / Introduction

The Farmers Markets are such wonderful resouces for communities. Here's some tips to help you

travail the market and prose to enhance your experience.


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Yes, we have no bananas. At the farmers market,Cambridge, fall, 2013. Our raspberries are delicious. Verydelicious.. But we have no bananas today.Shopping guidefor the Farmer's Market

Authors program note. Queen Mary of England and all the dominions beyond the seas, wife of that

most stolid of sovereigns, King George V, was always accounted the most prim and proper ofqueens, the model of firm, unyielding rectitude, smiles to be dispensed rarely, if ever and as forlaughing absolutely unthinkable, my dear, quite impossible.

But this view of Her Majesty is wrong, wrong, wrong. In fact, the queen had a resounding laugh shedeemed vulgar and an acute sense of humor so raucous that she made it her lifetime duty keeping itunder control for of a certainty a rip snorting belly laugh, princely gums clearly visible, and theimperial Raj, all ermine and brilliants, go ill together. as King George let the little lady know onthe day her carefree rendition of Yes! We have no bananas filled the royal corridors the daydistinguished by high hilarity, bobbed hair, a noticeably shorter skirt, warbling to a ukulele; allsignifying unwonted, exhilarating freedom and license

Weve string beans, and onions/ We have an old fashioned to-mah-to/ A Long Island po-tah-to/But yes, we have no bananas/ We have no bananas today.

The King, aghast, was not amused. Mareeee, you forget yourself, the atmosphere instantlydistinctly frosty and austere. And so she had and so we all should from time to time, for life in 13is complicated enough, difficult, frustrating, aggravating no piece of cake which is why Idecided to use this rollicking little number to accompany my article.

It hails back to the 1923 Broadway musical Make It Snappy by Frank Silver and Irving Cohn. Myfavorite version is by Selvins Orchestra, though Eddie Cantors original version is 23 Skidoo!Youll find it in any search engine, and, once heard, youll smile, this insidious, rambunctious tune

calculated to lift anyones spirits even haute royalty seemingly beyond thawing.The Josephs were groggy, sleepy, late.

My driver Aime Joseph and his always beguiling wife Mercedes are usually the soul of promptitude,but not yesterday. They were late provokingly late and I was impatient, as I can easily be whenI know what I want and want to get it immediately, no waiting, no excuses, no ifs, ands or buts.Being on time at the Farmers Market, 10 a.m. sharp, was such an event opening without mepresent, avid, keen for the big clock to ring out the commencing hour to the world, wasunimaginable.

And so I called the Josephs to chivvy them along, hinting darkly that if they didnt shake a leg, I

would take to my sometimes unsteady pegs at once, leaving these fine folks in their luxurious bedbehind for they are Haitian born and do not move to my insistent Midwestern beat, a world wherethe early bird gets the worm, even when one does not particularly care for the vermiform form andthats a fact.

Of course they must offer a suitably plausible excuse, one lifting responsibility from their unwillingshoulders to mine. We thought the rain would put you off. These were, of course, fightingwords a gauntlet thrown down, no matter how politely, insinuating as they did that I wassomehow pampered, effete, decadent, decayed, decrepit, degenerate even slothful and lazy; allcharges, explicit or implied, I rebutted at once, the best defense, as always, a strong offence deftly,immediately, conclusively delivered.

http://www.20WaystoProfit.com Copyright Patrice Porter - 2013 3 of 6

Yes, we have no bananas. At the farmers market, Cambridge, fall, 2013. Our raspberries are delicious. Verydelicious.. But we have no bananas today.Shopping guide for the Farmer's Market
http://www.20waystoprofit.com/http://www.20waystoprofit.com/


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With immaculate dignity and a stern bearing the tangible, unmistakable result of centuries of carefulbreeding, condescension to my aristocratic fingers, I dismissed their paltry point with finality. Therains had stopped; a sliver of sunshine already apparent the wares were displayed their sellersat the ready the only thing lacking me and my purse. Cancel, indeed! The very idea Icaught myself sputtering with righteous outrage. From such unconsidered, ill-advised commentsensue great feuds of the Hatfield and McCoy variety, but not today. The feud could wait but thefarm fresh produce most assuredly could not.

The lay of the land.

Now it is time to review the entire market, learning what it is, how it works, and how to secure thegreatest benefit, the choicest fruits and vegetables, thus the happiest and most delectable of results.There is here, as elsewhere, a system for getting the most for the least, a system most of the othercustomers, clueless urban dwellers never know and which I only share because of my well- knowneleemosynary disposition.

1) Draw up a list of what you want and the quantity. It is easy to overbuy at such a market.Everything looks so good.

2) Eat a little something before you arrive at the market. Shopping when hungry triggersoverbuying.

3) Make it a point to arrive precisely when the market opens, if you want the very freshest morsels.You do.

4) Walk through the entire market before buying anything. Do a complete and thoroughreconnaissance. Many stalls will sell similar merchandise. Find out where you get the best deals.

5) Always stop at the stalls offering a taste of this, a sample of that. Make it a point of honor to trynew things. Thats one of the great benefits of such a market. Note: if a vendor doesnt have samplesout, ask to try what interests you.

6) Always ask the sellers for a card. Note your favorite items and your evaluations. Keep thisinformation readily at hand for those days when you must give way to gustatory temptation.

7) Set a budget for your purchases. Like I said, its easy to overbuy. Do try to restrain yourself.Buying a few dozen apples may seem like a good idea but seeing them growing older and forlornwill cause chagrin.

8) Always bring a friend with a good eye and strong arm. Your job is to make decisions, give,orders, coordinating all. Mr. Joseph, two pounds of plums. This is the proper and efficient way toshop, transport and store.

And theyre off

Now its time to get serious, using your elbows and wits, jockeying for prime positions. Remember,this not merely shopping; its a Darwinian battle, only the fittest surviving to enjoy present spoilsconstantly learning and so preparing to win future spoils, too. And what are todays spoils, edibletrophies of eye, cultivated learning, discernment and unrivalled diligence, organization andpurchasing acumen? Here are just some

The fine Cortland apples, the late season blackberries, the unparalleled Concord grapes so desirablefor home-made jams; these are not merely so many fruits and vegetables on and on, my totalpurchases just a shade under $60, that so hefty because I insist on the unequaled jams concocted byHi Rise Bakery. They know their discerning audience is hooked on such regal combinations of




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strawberry rhubarb and strawberry raspberry. They gouge us accordingly.

Now its time to leave. Aime and Mercedes are devouring the superb scones, a small bribe for futurepunctuality. They are satisfied. But I have the feeling I missed something, something important.Bananas. And then the song simply burst from me, and though banana-less as I most assuredly was,I astonished my audience, as Queen Mary had once astonished hers

Yes, we gotta no banana/ No banana/ We gotta no banana today/ I sella you no banana. Oh, my,Ill send a copy of this article to Debbie at Kimballs Fruit Farm; Ill be the one in the red shirt.Im sure she and her ingenious colleagues will think of something. What about that ukulele? Itworked before

by Dr. Jeffrey Lant

About the Author

Harvard-educated Dr. Jeffrey Lant is the author of over a dozen print publications, several e-books,and over one thousand online articles.




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Resource

For your FREE Gardening Consultation ($50 Value) call me,Patrice Porter 1(306)469-5741 orCheck out http://www.gardeningforfoodsecurity.com for mentoring to have you creating Abundanceby Gardening!



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