Workshop #1:Personal Responsibility

New Braunfels Works gratefully acknowledges the contributions of Memorial Assistance Ministries and WorkFaith Connection in the creation of this curriculum.

Warm-Up Exercise

Why do I want to work?• • • • What’s holding me back?• • • •

Pair up and write some answers to the following questions:

1. Why do I want to work?

and

2. What’s holding me back?

Be quick, just list some bullets. No wrong answers. I will give you three minutes for each question.

The Pursuit of Happyness

What’s it about?

• TRUE STORY. A single father struggles to find work, avoid homelessness, and raise a young son.

• Because he (1) believes in himself, (2) refuses to be a victim, and (3) never quits, he overcomes incredible odds and gets the break he needs to start down the path to success.

Visualize What Success Looks Like

Chris Gardner was• Motivated• Accountable• Set Goals• Organized

He did not behave like a victim … he outworked his competitors … and that’s why he succeeded.

Will Smith’s face tells the story. Chris Gardner has fought so hard, and finally he succeeds. Watch this video to see what it looks like.

What does success look like?

Now, picture YOUR success

[insert your image of success here]

So, what’s stopping you?

THINGS INSIDE OF ME THINGS OUTSIDE OF ME

Are You a Professional Victim?

Dr. Gary DanielMotivation and Behavior SpecialistClients:

• business executives• professional athletes• entertainment industry celebrities

Victim mentality runs across all ages, races, wealth groups.

Victims are negative, unhappy, pessimistic, and expect failure.

They focus on how life is unfair, and it’s never their responsibility.

The blame is always on someone else or some external factor.

The good news: victims who choose to heal can heal. Healing means taking control of your life.

You can choose to live in your victim past, or move forward into your positive future. It’s up to you.

Businesses Don’t Hire VictimsThings a “victim” might be able to get:

1. A free night at a shelter

2. Free food at a food bank

3. Free clothes from a social service agency

Things a “victim” will not get:

4. A job

Why? Because “victims” are unwanted in businesses. Employers think bad attitudes are contagious. Interviewers are skilled at discovering the victim mentality, and weed it out every time.

Victimhood in Everyday Life

Victim Behavior

• Ignoring a problem

• Denying your responsibility

• Blaming someone else

• Making Excuses for failure

• Resisting needed changes

• Hiding from decisions

Responsible Behavior

• Recognizing an opportunity

• Owning the outcome

• Forgiving someone who erred

• Self-examining to do better

• Learning a new way to do it

• Taking action when needed

Taking Personal ResponsibilityEverything you are or ever hope to be is completely up to you.

Is that thought frightening? You have WAY more control than you think you do, and the minute that you take responsibility is the minute you will take your game to a higher level.

You can argue that your past experiences have negatively impacted your life. But blaming, justifying, complaining … these things will get you nowhere. The harsh truth is, you have not yet accepted complete responsibility for your life. The cavalry is not coming. The onus is on you to orchestrate your own rescue.

Remember that “responsibility” is made of two root words: “response” and “ability”. In essence, you have the ability to choose your response to any situation that faces you. Take responsibility, instead of blaming circumstances.

How to Take Charge of Your Life

1. Faith. You have to believe in something. Start with believing that you are here on earth for a reason.

2. Direction. You have to know where you want to go. Pick the direction that makes the most sense to you.

3. Daily Work. Anything worth having is worth working for. Sustained, reasonable effort over a long period of time beats intense but inconsistent effort in a short period of time.

4. Flexibility. Sometimes you have to make a mid-course correction to reach your goal. Be willing to change.

5. Persistence. Success won’t come overnight. Never, ever, ever quit.

Foundations of Responsibility

• Honesty• Underpromise and

overdeliver• Timeliness• Paying your debts

How to be More Responsible

• Find more motivation

• Have someone hold you accountable

• Set goals more often

• Get yourself organized

How to Motivate Yourself

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RT6H2G9Kl1A

A few tips on how to keep going:

“If you change the way you think about things, then the things you think about will start changing”.

How you think impacts what you say, and what you say impacts how you act. So it starts with how you think and talk to yourself. A few suggestions:

Eliminate words like “why”, “try”, “need”, “but”, “should”, “don’t”, and “hope”, because they contain negativity that helps you to justify inaction or self-defeating behavior.

Use the phrase “I choose” instead of “I need”. It helps to focus you on a behavior that puts YOU in control of your actions.

Your Homework

1. Pick one of the four ways to be more responsible (motivation, accountability, goals, or organization) that you promise to work on going forward.

2. Write a paragraph about HOW you are going to do it (be specific: for example, “I promise to be more motivated” is not an adequate answer).

3. Discuss your homework with staff or program volunteer.

4. Get him/her to initial your program tracking card.

Due Date: _______________________ Due Time: ________________

Thoughts to Leave On• Bad things happen to good people every day.

• We are not promised gold medals, or even simple successes on a daily basis. We have to work hard to get anything worthwhile in life, and we will have setbacks. All of us.

• When life knocks you down, get back up and keep going. Don’t ever quit. Never, ever, ever quit.

• You are not alone. If you have a grateful heart, and work hard for your success, others will help you. Not all the time, but enough of the time.

• Be positive. People help positive people who are helping themselves.

British sprinter Derek Redmond at the 1992 Barcelona Olympics