vdi _family protective_services
TRANSCRIPT
Verbal Defense & InfluenceDFPS Basic Instructor Class
Jan 7 – 11, 2013
In Memorial
Acknowledgements
• Dr. George Thompson President• Mike Manley Vice President• Lee Fjelstad Vice President• Gary T. Klugiewicz PoliceOne / Vistelar Group• Tony Pinelle VDI Master Trainer • Peter Harrell Jr. VDI Master Trainer
powered by
Tac Com Mosaic
Klugiewicz Background
• Martial Artist• Milwaukee County Sheriff’s Office• DAAT / POSC Program Developer• Calibre Press Street Survival Instructor• H&K / Team One Network• Verbal Judo / Verbal Defense & Influence• PoliceOne / CorrectionsOne
Harrell Background
• Senior Consultant Verbal Judo/Verbal Defense & Influence
• Organization and Development Specialist• Keynote Speaker• Actor• Father
VDI Class Formats
Verbal Judo Exposure
• Heard the term• Attended a conference presentation• Limited exposure in other classes• Attended a short orientation session• Took a one or two day class• Attended an Instructor class• Consider yourself an VJ Operator
Verbal Judo
Verbal Judo is a well established method of providing people with Tactical Communication skills.
Any situation has the potential for getting out of hand. Knowing how to “redirect a person’s behavior with words” is a person’s most important communication tool for keeping everyone safe.
Welcome• Registration• Welcome / Overview – Table Top Materials /
Name Tags• Build Binder / Manual Orientation• Participant Expectation Guidelines• Training Safety Rules• Videotaping Orientation / Instructor
Introduction• Attendee Background / Duties / Expectations• Assignments - Reading• Performance Testing Choices• Certificates
Instructor Roles & Responsibilities
• Registration• Welcome / Overview – Table Top Materials /
Name Tags• Build Binder / Manual Orientation• Participant Expectation Guidelines• Training Safety Rules• Videotaping Orientation / Instructor
Introduction• Attendee Background / Duties / Expectations• Assignments - Reading• Performance Testing Choices• Certificates
Student Expectation Guidelines
• Minimum of 90% Attendance with Make Up
• Open Mind / Positive Attitude• Compliance with Training Safety Rules• Contact Instructor if Late / Absent• Successful Completion of Practical
Exercises• At least 80% on All Written Tests• Complete and Turn In Final Evaluations
Student Expectation Guidelines
Teach to Learn
• When we listen with the intent to teach, we learn at a deeper level.
• When we teach, we gain new insight and our learning expands,
Stephen Covey
• Instructor One Voice – Stop Immediately
• Instructor Raised Hand – Finish your sentence but not the paragraph
• Student “STOP” Notification Statement –Use whenever you don’t understand what is being said by the instructor
• Use of electronic equipment
Classroom Management
How the Class will be Taught
1. Demonstration
2. Explanation
3. Repetition
4. Simulation
Changing Educational Paradigm
How People Learn
1. Hearing
2. Seeing
3. Doing
4. Experiencing
5. TeachingKaren Spencer,
PhD.
Purposeful Teaching
Retaining Knowledge
Student Expectation Guidelines
Teach to Learn
• When we listen with the intent to teach, we learn at a deeper level.
• When we teach, we gain new insight and our learning expands,
Stephen Covey
1. 5% Lecture 2. 10% Reading 3. 20% Audiovisual 4. 30% Demonstration 5. 50% Group Discussion 6. 75% Learning by Doing 7. 90% Teaching Others
Adapted from David Sousa, How the Brain Learnsby Cynthia Furse, University of Utah
Learning Pyramid %
Goals of the Course
• PERSONAL SAFETY• Enhanced Professionalism• Decreased Citizen Complaints• Decreased Vicarious Liability• Lessen Stress • Court Power & Articulation• Increased Staff Morale
Program Format
• Self – Assessment
• Professionalism
• Communication Theory
• Tactics
Part One
SELF ASSESSMENT
Self - Assessment
Self - Assessment
Who are you?
Principles/Attributes
Five Universal Truths
1. All people want to be treated with dignity and respect.
2. All people want to be asked rather than being told to do something.
3. All people want to be told why they are being asked to do something.
4. All people want to be to be given options rather than threats.
5. All people want a second chance.
Five Universal Truths
5DFPS Staff treat others:
1. ALWAYS TREAT OTHERS with dignity and respect.
2. ASK THEM, don’t tell them to do something.3. TELL THEM WHY they should do it.4. GIVE OPTIONS, not threats.5. GIVE THEM a second chance, if appropriate.
1
© Verbal Defense & Influence with the Verbal Judo Institute, Inc. 39
Five Universal Truths
Regardless of differences, all people want;
1) To be treated with dignity & respect.
2) To be asked rather than told to do something.
3) To be told why they’re being asked to do something.
4) To be given options rather than threats.
5) To be given a 2nd chance.
Adapted from ‘5 Universal Truths of Verbal Judo’ by Dr. Thompson of the Verbal Judo Institute. ©2008 Verbal Judo®
© Verbal Defense & Influence with the Verbal Judo Institute, Inc. 40
ACTIVITY
Teach to Learn
Pick a partner and teach 5 UT Then discuss how it may improve the agency, and your life.
Part Two
PROFESSIONALISM
Good Decision Making?
• Why do you make such good decisions?
• Experience
• How do you get experience?
• Bad Decisions
Traits of a Professional
• High Visibility• Quick Decisions• Codified Body of Knowledge• Continuous Training• Adapt to Change• Ethical Standard of Conduct• Licensed; Badge A Symbol Of
Universal Greeting’s Purpose
Tactical 8 Step Concept
Universal Greeting
Universal Greeting Script
8.1 Good Morning,8.2 I’m Gary Klugiewicz, a consultant with Verbal Defense &
Influence.8.3 The reason I am here this morning is to introduce my
partner Peter Harrell Jr. who is He is currently a senior consultant for Verbal Defense & Influence He is an actor with 40 years experience Retired state employee Father/Spouse
8.6 One of Peter’s expectations for the class is to have the participants perform Tactical Communication Tactics with people they interact with at work, their clients, as well as their family, friends, and others.
Universal Greeting (a.)
• Morning Coffee• 8.1. Good Morning, _____________ • (Use customer service representatives name, if
known)• 8.2. My name is ________________. I am a
guest in Room 204.• 8.3. The reason that I am contacting you is that
its 4AM and wanted to get a cup a coffee. I noticed that there is no coffee machine in the room.
• 8.4. Is there somewhere in the hotel where I can get a cup of coffee?
Universal Greeting (b.)
• Information Gathering• I am … (Title / Name) from the … (List your
agency).• I am here to attend this Verbal Defense &
Influence Course. I have been asked to interview you.
• May I ask you name, title, current assignment, any personal information that you would like to disclose, and one of your expectations for the class?
Universal Greeting (c.)
• Partner Introduction to Class• Good Morning…• I am … (Title / Name) from the … (List your
agency).• The reason I am here this morning is to
introduce … Introduce your partner with name, rank, agency, position with other background and personal information as noted.
• Explain one of your partner’s expectations for the class
ACTIVITY
Using one of the introduction scripts, introduce your partner to group.
The Goal of
Professional Intervention
is toGenerate Voluntary Compliance,
CollaborationCooperation and
Overcoming A Natural Adversarial Relationship
Our Job
To Meet & Greet and O.N.A.R.
Overcome Natural Adversarial Relationship
Our Service To The Community
We Think For OthersAs They Might Think For Themselves
48-72 Hours Later.
Learn to stop
REACTING
and start
RESPONDING
to the ongoing situation.
Professionalism Concept
Tactical Cognitive Dissonance
TCD is a professional survival trait at allows you to leave your Personal Value System at home and utilize your Professional Value System at work creating an Alter Ego that will keep you and others safe.
Maintaining Emotional Equilibrium
Dis / interest
Non Bias
NO MIND
Maintaining Emotional Equilibrium
MUSHIN is:
Professional Detachment
A Habit of Mind
One must remain Open , Flexible and Unbiased.
Maintaining Emotional Equilibrium
What is your public professional face?
• Affect• Calm, Still Center• Become an Chameleon• You are what you look like• You are what you sound like
Personal vs. Professional Face
ACTIVITY
Pick a different partner, and use a professional face appropriate for work; home.
Maintaining Emotional Equilibrium
Chief Harry Dolan’s “Rule of 24”
• 24 hours• 24 minutes• 24 seconds
Maintaining Emotional Equilibrium
A term used to mentally give you a tactical mind set for the task at hand. A reminder to use your professional face and words that will generate voluntary compliance, cooperation and collaboration.
ACTIVITY
Pick a different partner, and discuss what methods you currently are using to keep your “emotional equilibrium.” What are some steps you could both use in the future?
Know Your Weaknesses
Name It: “Mr. Better Than”
He Who . . .Define It:
The Path To Strength Is Built OnRecognized Weaknesses.
Hot Buttons
or
Triggers
Challenges My Authority
ACTIVITY
Discuss with your partner two “weaknesses” you are currently aware of. Design a “trigger guard” for your weaknesses.
How many people are usually told about a negative contact?
It has been estimated that seventeen persons are told about an negative employee contact that is seen by only one person.
How may people are told about an event
witnessed by 100’s or 1000’s of spectators?
The Contact Professional
• In Contact With Self
• In Contact With The Organization
• In Contact With The Subject.
The Contact Professional
1. Self
2.
3.
4.
5.
Who Do You Represent?
ACTIVITY
Pick a different partner, and discuss what how you became a professional.
S.A.F.E.R
S.A.F.E.R.
Ethical Intervention Concept
ETHOS = “Self” Ethical intervention is "the representative self acting to uphold the standard of conduct expected by one's office.
Whenever our 'personal self' acts in contradiction to our 'representative self' we need another to act for us as we would act under better conditions--hence "Ethical Intervention.”
In other words, Ethical Intervention is an act that helps sustain our best Representational Power under stress. It is, then, THE act of the Art of Representation. Dr. George Thompson
Ethical Intervention Concept
You are the representative
• Isn’t it true that at the point of contact, a single employee “represents” the whole organization for better… or worse?
• What kind of representative are you?
Ethical Intervention Concept
Ethical Intervention Concept
There are no longer any innocent professional bystanders.
• Assist your fellow staff members
• Fix something if it’s going wrong
• Stop something that’s wrong
• But no matter what, you need to write a report that explains what you observed.
Ethical Intervention Concept
Ethical Intervention Concept
Ethical Intervention Concept
1. Protection from a Sudden Assault2. Protection from Poor Tactics: Staff
Safety Violations3. Protection from Policy Violations4. Protection from Out of Control
Behavior
Ethical Intervention Concept
Ethical Interventions
Verbal Intervention
• Simply talk to your partner• “Showtime”• “Be Careful Partner”• “Knock It Off”• Investigator Tap Out• Call for Assistance
Chief Dolan’s “Knock It Off”
• Previous generations of employees in the workplace simply did what they were asked to do with little debate. Many younger employees have been raised demanding to know “why”. So tell them “why” and see how quickly they come on board.
• Most importantly, when their actions or comments are inconsistent with your organizations mission, tell them to “Knock It Off”.
Harry Dolan “Knock It Off
Golden Rule
Platinum Rule
Treat others as
you would like to be treated under the same circumstances.
Cultivating the Art of Courtesy
Cultivating the Art of Courtesy
Three Kinds of People
There are 102 Cultures in the U.S.
But Only
Three Kinds of People
Three Kinds of People
Difficult People
ACTIVITY
Pick a different partner, and discuss what how you have handled difficult people in the past. At work? At home? In the community?
Part Three
COMMUNICATION THEORY
Hart Peace Story
Communication Theory
The opposite of talking should be LISTENING but for most people it is WAITING TO INTERRUPT!
Be Alert & Decisive
• Remain Alert
• Be Decisive
• Have a preplanned, practiced response in mind
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
• You must be Unbiased, Flexible, and Open
• Hear Literally
• Interpret Accurately
• Act Appropriately
If you don’t listen to what the person is
saying, watch what they are doing, and put
everything in “context” of the current
situation and the distance you are from the
person, you will never see the argument,
complaint and/or assault coming.
The Great Equalizer
• Words• Tone of Voice• Facial Expressions• Body Language• Context of the Situation• Distance / Positioning
Listening Components
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
Empathize
• To See Through The Others Eyes
• Construct A Verbal Means To Relate To
The Subject
• You Do Not Have To Agree… Simply
Understand The Others Perspective.
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
Tactical Empathy
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
Listening & Empathizing• Listening gives you intel on where the
subject is today.• Empathizing gives you intel on where the
subject has been in the past.• Combining knowing where the subject is
today and has been in the past gives you the best predictor of where the subject is going to go in the near future.
ACTIVITY
Discuss with your group a time when you could have used empathy but didn’t. What was the result? How does one attain empathy?
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
Ask
(Five Types of Questions)
• Fact Finding
• General
• Direct
• Leading
• Opinion Seeking.
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
“Sword of Interruption Technique”
Say … “Excuse me, let me see, you seem to be (feeling/emotion) _______________ because of (content/reason) ________________.”
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
• Anti – Peace Phrases• Calm Down!• What’s Your Problem?• You People…• Come Over Here!• I’m not going to tell you again…• Because these are the rules!
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
• Tactical Peace Phrases
ACTIVITY
Teach the concept of LEAPS to a group of three. Each person will take a turn. Discuss with your triad, which LEAPS concepts you are currently using. Which ones do you need work on.
Street Truth
Art of Mediation
Art of Mediation
People in crisis are often under the influences of:• Rage• Anger• FEAR• Frustration• The Unknown• They are “trapped” in a box…We must
open the box with options.
Art of Mediation
The Art Of Translation
The Art Of Translation
Quicksand
Street Truth
“Self As Seen By Self”
Street Truth
Street Truth
• Street Truth # 3
• 93% of your success is determined by your delivery style.
Communication Theory
93% = Delivery Style
Communication Theory
Credibility = Credo
Belief
Power & Influence
History
Content
Communication Theory
• 33 – 40%• How you Say it
VOICE
If there is a contradiction between “Content” and “Voice”, which should you believe?
Communication Theory
• Tone = Attitude
• Pace = Speed
• Pitch = High/Soft
• Modulation = Ebb & Flow
VOICE
The Voice is a window of a person’s intentions.
Communication Theory
ROLE VS VOICE
Communication Theory
Communication Theory
Communication Theory
Communication Theory
Communication Theory
Communication Theory
Communication Theory
“Anger Management”
ACTIVITY
Form teams of 3-4 and debrief film. (1) Use tactics learned to improve response. (2) Demonstrate improved response to class.
ACTIVITY
This section of the class will involve…
MOVEMENT
Part Five
PROXEMICS
Gary Fire Talk/Fire Drills
Proxemics
(prok-se-miks) The study of the cultural, behavioral, and sociological aspects of spatial
distances between individuals.
Proxemics
Proxemics
Proxemics
•Note: These tactics were develop by Gary T. Klugiewicz with contributions from Tony Pinelle, Joel Lashley, and Doug Lynch based on material provided by Dr. George Thompson and numerous nationally known defensive tactics and crisis management instructors• • •© 2012 Verbal Defense & Influence
Proxemics
Proxemics
Proxemics
Proxemics
Proxemics
R.A.M.
Reasonable Arc of Movement
Proxemics
Tony “Thinker Stance”
Proxemics
Proxemics
Proxemics
Proxemics
“Sitting Tactically”
Proxemics
Drills
Part Six
TACTICS
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
ACTIVITY
Form teams of 3-4 and discuss “Anatomy of a Verbal Assault”.
Tactics
Anatomy of a Verbal Assault
1. What are the reasons for verbal assaults?
2. How do you control your personal/professional face?
3. In the past, how have you handled verbal assaults? At work? At Home?
Tactics
• Types of Verbal Assaults• Authority• Profanity• Personal Threats• Family Safety• Other Staff
Tactics
• Types of Verbal Assaults• Physical Features• Age/Sex/Sexuality• Skill/Competence• Education• Economic Status
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
• Funny Word Blocks (Quick, Appropriate, no Counter Punch)
• Serious Word Blocks• Polite Threat Word Blocks• Mobilizing the Audience Word Blocks• Sudden Assault (Time Out) Word
Blocks
Tactics
Tactics
Combination Deflectors
• I hear what you’re saying, and I got that, however…
• I hear that, and I’m listening, but…
• You seem upset, and I’m sorry you feel that way, however…
Tactics
EXAMPLEComment:“Why are you at my house again, I get tired of ya’ll coming here. Don’t you have anything better to do than bother us?”Response:“ I can see you are upset, I’m here again to get some information we need to be able to assist your family.”
ACTIVITY
Your team will create two real life scenarios from your work experience and use deflectors to handle verbal abuse.
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
1. Listen
2. Empathize
3. Ask
4. Paraphrase
5. Summarize
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
• Security• Attack• Flight• Excessive Repetition• Revised Priorities
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
Universal Greeting
Tactics
Persuasion Sequence
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
The Art Of Translation
Art of Mediation
Tactics
Five Universal Truths
5DFPS Staff treat others:
1. ALWAYS TREAT OTHERS with dignity and respect.
2. ASK THEM, don’t tell them to do something.3. TELL THEM WHY they should do it.4. GIVE OPTIONS, not threats.5. GIVE THEM a second chance, if appropriate.
1
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
ACTIVITY
In teams of three, formulate scenarios from past work experiences.
ACTIVITY
Conduct Demonstrations Persuasion Sequence Techniques using Real – Life scenarios.
Part Seven
Improving Future Performance
Improving Future Performance
Improving Future Performance
• Are you OK? Wellness Check• How do you think you did? What
happened?• Positive comment, if possible• What would you do different next time? • Instructor, role player, and/or peer jury
comments• Instructor Summation
Improving Future Performance
• Always Keep Professional Face• Always Treat Others As You Would Want
To Be Treated . . . Under Identical Circumstances
• Never Inflate People With Adrenaline• Flexibility Is Strength - Rigidity Weakness• Redirect Rather Than Resist.
Improving Future Performance
• It’s Not Enough To BE Good, You Have To
LOOK Good & SOUND Good, or It’s NO Good!
• Never Step On One’s Personal Face!
• People are Like Steel - When We Lose Our
Temper We Are Useless!
Improving Future Performance
How will this training affect my relationships? At Work? At Home?In Community?
END