Using Quotes Well with Divergent

Here are a few overall guidelines for this assignment:

- Don’t begin the paragraph with the quote.- The quote is evidence, not a claim.

- Don’t begin with “This quote means,” “An important quote is.”- This means nothing to a potential reader, which is who you are writing this for

- not just for me, but for an audience who has read, or is familiar with, the book.

- Avoid broad language.- “Important.” “This quote means.” This presentation will help you think

through how you might do this.

My Quote

• Since we went over it in class, I’ll use this quote:

(p. 47)

First, I want to think about the context (when it happens in the book):

Make some notes:

This happens when Beatrice chooses her faction.

Beatrice is a member of Abnegation, which is all about selflessness.

The opening scene of the book has Beatrice looking in a mirror, even though she’s not really supposed to.

Beatrice watches Dauntless members jump out of a train with envy.

Beatrice feels that she’s plain and normal.

Beatrice always wants to do what he family says.

Next, take some notes on what the quote means to you:

It means that being selfish is being brave.Beatrice seems to put a lot of importance on I (she uses first person).Abnegation doesn’t put any importance on I (its all about the community)Beatrice has been told she’s divergent, which suggests she might depart from what she’s always been.

Your ClaimIn the past, I’ve mentioned that you come to your claim last.

But here, let’s think about something that can kick-start the paragraph. First, I want to give appropriate context:

“When Beatrice joins Dauntless,”

That puts the reader in the moment. Notice what I don’t say • “In this quote”• “When Beatrice says I am selfish . . .”• “On page 47,”

This sets up the moment that I’m going to be talk about.

Your ClaimNow we need to make an argument for the paragraph – something like this:

““When Beatrice joins Dauntless,”

“. . . she learns that being an individual is more important than conforming to the rules of a community.”

So now I’ve taken some ideas I’ve come up with more informally, and organized them into a paragraph.

What next?

I could move right into the quote…

When Beatrice joins Dauntless, she learns that being an individual is more important than conforming to the rules of a community. She says “I am selfish, I am brave.”

But that doesn’t really work very well, does it? I need some more context: I need to set up the quote.

So what I’m going to do is give some details about Abnegation.

Context

When Beatrice joins Dauntless, she learns that being an individual is more important than conforming to the rules of a community. Abnegation is all about a selflessness, to the point where she can only look in the mirror only occasionally.

This sentence builds off the last: I’ve moved from the “individual” and “community” stuff to a point about what Beatrice used to be like and now I’ve given another piece of evidence (the mirror) to show how she’s changing, what she’s going to learn.

So now the quote?It seems like a good place for a quote, doesn’t it?

When Beatrice joins Dauntless, she learns that being an individual is more important than conforming to the rules of a community. Abnegation is all about a selflessness, to the point where she can only look in the mirror only occasionally. [“I am selfish. I am brave.”]

But how should we introduce it?• She says “I am selfish, I am brave” ?• Beatrice joins Dauntless and says “I am selfish, I am brave.”• Beatrice tell us, “I am selfish, I am brave.”

This is okay, I guess, but let’s provide some more context, and also say something about it.

How about this?When Beatrice joins Dauntless, she learns that being an individual is more important than conforming to the rules of a community. Abnegation is all about a selflessness, to the point where she can only look in the mirror only occasionally. When Beatrice drips her blood into the Dauntless coals and states, “I am selfish. I am brave,” she announces that she will no longer conform to the selflessness that Abnegation values.

What I’ve done now is build on the last sentences, and show the value and significance of the quote.

Notice that I haven’t just put the quote by itself, but have included it in a sentence that discusses what it does, and why it matters. This is a good strategy for quoting.

The next step is to analyze the quote . . .

Dealing with quotes

Again, you don’t just want to say “This Means”

Here some mediocre sentences that we should avoid:• “This means that she is selfish and brave.”• “This means that she’s no longer in Abnegation and is now in Dauntless,

which is selfish.”• “Beatrice is saying that she’s not going to be selfless anymore.”

These just repeat: instead, go further.

When Beatrice drips her blood into the Dauntless coals and states, “I am selfish. I am brave,” she announces that she will no longer conform to the selflessness that Abnegation values. By being “selfish,” Beatrice is rejecting the control that she has always grown up with, and refuses to submit to laws that do not make sense to her.

See how this moves from the quote to something specific about the book and the themes that the book explores?

It uses the quote as a way of moving further through the paragraph, and develops new ideas.

Let’s continue that thought:When Beatrice joins Dauntless, she learns that being an individual is more important than conforming to the rules of a community. Abnegation is all about a selflessness, to the point where she can only look in the mirror only occasionally. When Beatrice drips her blood into the Dauntless coals and states, “I am selfish. I am brave,” she announces that she will no longer conform to the selflessness that Abnegation values. By being “selfish,” Beatrice is rejecting the control that she has always grown up with, and refuses to submit to laws that do not make sense to her. Being selfish is everything that Beatrice has been told not to be, and so she is “brave” by rejecting the dull comfort that she has always known.

See what I’m doing here by developing that last idea? And now I’m dealing with the “brave” part.

Let’s keep goingWhen Beatrice joins Dauntless, she learns that being an individual is more important than conforming to the rules of a community. Abnegation is all about a selflessness, to the point where she can only look in the mirror only occasionally. When Beatrice drips her blood into the Dauntless coals and states, “I am selfish. I am brave,” she announces that she will no longer conform to the selflessness that Abnegation values. By being “selfish,” Beatrice is rejecting the control that she has always grown up with, and refuses to submit to laws that do not make sense to her. Being selfish is everything that Beatrice has been told not to be, and so she is “brave” by rejecting the dull comfort that she has always known. Even though Abnegation is a safe and peaceful existence, Dauntless lets her have a life in which she can show off her talents and abilities rather than hide them.

I’m dealing with “brave” part some more, and I’m also moving from Abnegation to Dauntless, just like Beatrice does.

On that note . . .Since Beatrice is “divergent,” she is learning that the best things to do are not always what others expect. Being in Dauntless will be a challenge for her, as she faces physical and verbal abuse from those like Peter who seem better suited for such violence and fighting. However, in overcoming these obstacles, Beatrice realizes that she was never made for the categories that she was born into.

Talking about the way that Beatrice is “divergent” setsup another aspect, and also discusses the challenges. I’m now dealing with the way she’s brave,and how this is different than everything she’s known.

Here’s what I have so far.

When Beatrice joins Dauntless, she learns that being an individual is more important than conforming to the rules of a community. Abnegation is all about a selflessness, to the point where she can only look in the mirror only occasionally. When Beatrice drips her blood into the Dauntless coals and states, “I am selfish. I am brave,” she announces that she will no longer conform to the selflessness that Abnegation values. By being “selfish,” Beatrice is rejecting the control that she has always grown up with, and refuses to submit to laws that do not make sense to her. Being selfish is everything that Beatrice has been told not to be, and so she is “brave” by rejecting the dull comfort that she has always known. Even though Abnegation is a safe and peaceful existence, Dauntless lets her have a life in which she can show off her talents and abilities rather than hide them. Since Beatrice is “divergent,” she is learning that the best things to do are not always what others expect. Being in Dauntless will be a challenge for her, as she faces physical and verbal abuse from those like Peter who seem better suited for such violence and fighting

And here’s how it’s broken up:

Claim:

When Beatrice joins Dauntless, she learns that being an individual is more important than conforming to the rules of a community.

Evidence:

Abnegation is all about a selflessness, to the point where she can only look in the mirror only occasionally. When Beatrice drips her blood into the Dauntless coals and states, “I am selfish. I am brave,” she announces that she will no longer conform to the selflessness that Abnegation values.

Analysis in which I deal with the “selfish” part:

By being “selfish,” Beatrice is rejecting the control that she has always grown up with, and refuses to submit to laws that do not make sense to her. Being selfish is everything that Beatrice has been told not to be, and so she is “brave” by rejecting the dull comfort that she has always known. Even though Abnegation is a safe and peaceful existence, Dauntless lets her have a life in which she can show off her talents and abilities rather than hide them.

Analysis in which I deal with the “brave” part:

Since Beatrice is “divergent,” she is learning that the best things to do are not always what others expect. Being in Dauntless will be a challenge for her, as she faces physical and verbal abuse from those like Peter who seem better suited for such violence and fighting. However, in overcoming these obstacles, Beatrice realizes that she was never made for the categories that she was born into.

Also . . .Claim:

When Beatrice joins Dauntless, she learns that being an individual is more important than conforming to the rules of a community.

Evidence:

Abnegation is all about a selflessness, to the point where she can only look in the mirror only occasionally. When Beatrice drips her blood into the Dauntless coals and states, “I am selfish. I am brave,” she announces that she will no longer conform to the selflessness that Abnegation values.

Analysis in which I deal with the “selfish” part:

By being “selfish,” Beatrice is rejecting the control that she has always grown up with, and refuses to submit to laws that do not make sense to her. Being selfish is everything that Beatrice has been told not to be, and so she is “brave” by rejecting the dull comfort that she has always known. Even though Abnegation is a safe and peaceful existence, Dauntless lets her have a life in which she can show off her talents and abilities rather than hide them.

Analysis in which I deal with the “brave” part:

Since Beatrice is “divergent,” she is learning that the best things to do are not always what others expect. Being in Dauntless will be a challenge for her, as she faces physical and verbal abuse from those like Peter who seem better suited for such violence and fighting. However, in overcoming these obstacles, Beatrice realizes that she was never made for the categories that she was born into.

Notice the way I mix evidence with the analysis. It’s doesn’t have to be simply “ClaimsEvidenceAnalysis”I can mix evidence in with my analysis. Evidence just has to be there.

Evidence

• You don’t want to overwhelm your paragraph with evidence.• You also don’t want your paragraph to have no evidence.• In this case, a quote is my evidence, and I have other kinds of evidence as well.• I could also add more quotes in here, but I’ve chosen not to. It doesn’t seem necessary.

When Beatrice joins Dauntless, she learns that being an individual is more important than conforming to the rules of a community. Abnegation is all about a selflessness, to the point where she can only look in the mirror only occasionally. When Beatrice drips her blood into the Dauntless coals and states, “I am selfish. I am brave,” she announces that she will no longer conform to the selflessness that Abnegation values. By being “selfish,” Beatrice is rejecting the control that she has always grown up with, and refuses to submit to laws that do not make sense to her. Being selfish is everything that Beatrice has been told not to be, and so she is “brave” by rejecting the dull comfort that she has always known. Even though Abnegation is a safe and peaceful existence, Dauntless lets her have a life in which she can show off her talents and abilities rather than hide them. Since Beatrice is “divergent,” she is learning that the best things to do are not always what others expect. Being in Dauntless will be a challenge for her, as she faces physical and verbal abuse from those like Peter who seem better suited for such violence and fighting. However, in overcoming these obstacles, Beatrice realizes that she was never made for the categories that she was born into

I’m going to add one more transition sentence.

• Even though Dauntless has significant problems as well, Beatrice shows her skill and courage in a way that Abnegation would never allow her.

Remember my claim? “When Beatrice joins Dauntless, she learns that being an

individual is more important than conforming to the rules of a

community. “

Now I’ve come back to it, and I’ve tied Beatrice’s “skill” and “courage” into that initial point about “conforming to rules”

What next?

• I could end it here, but I have more to say.• I’m going to take if further, by talking about the reason these books

have an impact, and the way Beatrice’s story has bigger lessons.

Just like Beatrice realizes that she was never meant to be completely selfless, many teenagers feel like their choices are already made for them.

This is something we’ve talked a lot about in class, and it ties back into the quote that serves as the basis for the paragraph.

And a good conclusion sentence. . .I’m going to build on my previous point, and also, I’m going to build on that opening sentence that started things:

Just like Beatrice realizes that she was never meant to be completely selfless, many teenagers feel like their choices are already made for them. Perhaps one of the reasons Divergent is so successful is that it shows an individual fighting back against that system, and refusing to be defined by others.

That kind of puts a punctuation mark on things – it’s not perfect, but this is only a short paragraph and it kind of needs that ending.

Here’s my paragraph.

When Beatrice joins Dauntless, she learns that being an individual is more important than conforming to the rules of a community. Abnegation is all about a selflessness, to the point where she can only look in the mirror only occasionally. When Beatrice drips her blood into the Dauntless coals and states, “I am selfish. I am brave,” she announces that she will no longer conform to the selflessness that Abnegation values. By being “selfish,” Beatrice is rejecting the control that she has always grown up with, and refuses to submit to laws that do not make sense to her. Being selfish is everything that Beatrice has been told not to be, and so she is “brave” by rejecting the dull comfort that she has always known. Even though Abnegation is a safe and peaceful existence, Dauntless lets her have a life in which she can show off her talents and abilities rather than hide them. Since Beatrice is “divergent,” she is learning that the best things to do are not always what others expect. Being in Dauntless will be a challenge for her, as she faces physical and verbal abuse from those like Peter who seem better suited for such violence and fighting. However, in overcoming these obstacles, Beatrice realizes that she was never made for the categories that she was born into. Even though Dauntless has significant problems as well, Beatrice shows her skill and courage in a way that Abnegation would never allow her. Just like Beatrice realizes that she was never meant to be completely selfless, many teenagers feel like their choices are already made for them. Perhaps one of the reasons Divergent is so successful is that it shows an individual fighting back against that system, and refusing to be defined by others.

And here’s how it’s broken up into sentences…1. When Beatrice joins Dauntless, she learns that being an individual is more important than conforming to the rules of a

community. 2. Abnegation is all about a selflessness, to the point where she can only look in the mirror only occasionally.3. When Beatrice drips her blood into the Dauntless coals and states, “I am selfish. I am brave,” she announces that she will no

longer conform to the selflessness that Abnegation values.4. By being “selfish,” Beatrice is rejecting the control that she has always grown up with, and refuses to submit to laws that do not

make sense to her.5. Being selfish is everything that Beatrice has been told not to be, and so she is “brave” by rejecting the dull comfort that she has

always known. 6. Even though Abnegation is a safe and peaceful existence, Dauntless lets her have a life in which she can show off her talents and

abilities rather than hide them. 7. Since Beatrice is “divergent,” she is learning that the best things to do are not always what others expect.8. Being in Dauntless will be a challenge for her, as she faces physical and verbal abuse.9. However, in overcoming these obstacles, Beatrice realizes that she was never made for the categories that she was born into.10. Even though Dauntless has significant problems as well, Beatrice shows her skill and courage in a way that Abnegation would

never allow her.11. Just like Beatrice realizes that she was never meant to be completely selfless, many teenagers feel like their choices are already

made for them.12. Perhaps one of the reasons Divergent is so successful is that it shows an individual fighting back against that system, and refusing

to be defined by others.

So what can we take away from this?

Since you’re writing short paragraphs, think about the strategy of your sentences and the way they flow from one to the next.

Introduce quotes, and give the necessary context for them. Don’t just say “This means,” but use the following sentences to show that meaning.

Tie things back into your opening claim.

End the paragraph well – make some bigger points that build on what you’ve already written.