uog-2011

8/4/2019 UOG-2011wwwCh6CardCulture

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—Kristi Bohl

Stanford Dictionary

BYO—bring your own. Sometimes used in the context of beverages, but often usedfor meetings and gatherings as BYOL (bring your own laptop) or BYO_______ (fillin the blank).

The Claw—the massive fountain in front of the Bookstore. The preferred location of

fountain hopping and summery gallivanting.CoHo—the Coffee House in Tresidder Union. It’s a favorite hangout for students and

faculty alike, with crepes, paninis, and salads galore, as well as a scrumptiousselection of coffee drinks. They often have student and local band performances.

EANABs—equally attractive non-alcoholic beverages, which are required at parties.

FloMo—Florence Moore Hall. Donor Florence Moore required that that ice cream beserved at every meal as a condition of donation. Pro tip: they have amazing Indianfood for Sunday dinners.

FroSoCo—Freshman Sophomore College. An enchanted land of elusive folk,FroSoCo is an academically focused residence with about 180 students at the westend of campus. FroSoCo-ans (FroSoCoids?) are known for being somewhat moreinsular, but tend to have a higher-than-average representation in student groups andleadership. Hm….

FroYo— frozen yogurt! With Fraiche, Red Mango, and plenty of others downUniversity Ave, if you’re not yet addicted, you will be soon.

Content provided by TUSB—Kristi Bohl, Andrea Acosta

Cardinal Culture

6—C ARDINAL CULTURE 67



GSB—Graduate School of Business. Where beautiful, enterprising freshmen girlsstudy… for obvious reasons.

HooTow—Hoover Tower. The best view on campus, and a favorite locale of LSJUMBtrombone solos.

IMs—intramurals. An awesome way to make and build friendships while working up

a sweat. Besides, when else will you get to play intramural innertube water poloagainst a team called “Super Happy Best Friends?”

IntroSem—introductory seminars. Typically involving significant hands-oncoursework, these small, capped classes with top faculty are an unforgettable part of the Stanford experience. Don’t miss out.

IHUM—Introduction to the Humanities, the all-year required freshman course. Formany students it’s a love / hate relationship, and it’s typically a strong litmus test forthe techie / fuzzie divide.

LSJUMB—the Band. See the next section for their wacky history.MemAud—Memorial Auditorium, currently the largest indoor performing space on

campus. It’s a popular venue for student plays, a capella and dance performances, aswell as A-list guests like Bill Gates and Third Eye Blind.

MemFountain—the fountain between MemAud and HooTow, it’s often the victim of many a good-natured prank or shenanigan. Dyed red for Big Game, multicoloredafter Holi, and a frequent recipient of bubble bath liquid.


UNAFF

United Nations Association Film Festival

In its commitment to bring the best documentaries to Stanford,

this October the CAMERA AS WITNESS Program presents the 14th

UNAFF (United Nations Association Film Festival) at five Stanford

locations—Annenberg Auditorium, Cubberley Auditorium,

Cantor Museum, Freeman Spogli Institute and Stanford Medical School. CAW Pro-

gram is based at the School of Education and has support from more than 30 different

Stanford groups and Departments.

UNAFF this year features 70 documentaries and 70 countries centered around the

theme EDUCATION IS A HUMAN RIGHT and will be held October 21–30, 2011 at Stan-

ford University, Palo Alto, East Palo Alto and San Francisco.

All the UNAFF screenings at Stanford are FREE with Student ID. For schedule and

tickets and how to become a volunteer please visit www.unaff.org.

Like UNAFF at www.facebook.com/UNAFF

The CAMERA AS WITNESS Program continues throughout the academic year bring-

ing award winning documentaries, filmmakers and speakers to Stanford classrooms,

special events and dorms. If you are interested in having docs at your event or in your

dorm, please contact [email protected] .



ProFro (RoHo, HoHo)—all acronyms referring to participants in Admit Weekend.Prospective Freshmen, Room Hosts, and House Hosts abound in a dazzlingweekend of tongue-twisters and confusion.

PWR—Program in Writing and Rhetoric. Freshman year PWR classes are writingbased, and sophomore year PWR classes are public-speaking based. These small,

often-esoteric classes are a fun chance to choose your own adventure—just makesure to choose a good professor.

Rally—to dress rally is to dress as ridiculously as possible. This is often theexpected attire at Special D (see below), as well as men’s volleyball games andanything the Band ever does. Start stockpiling your tutus; you never know whenthey’ll come in handy.

SEQ —the new Science and Engineering Quad has by far the best lounging / rolling / sun-tanning / bubble-blowing / galumphing hills on campus. They also havemultimillion dollar nanotech labs and the best sandwiches on campus (Ike’s).

SLE—Structured Liberal Education. A rigorous and intellectually intense freshmanprogram that has been described as everything from “a life-changing academicexperience” to “that place where they engage in awkward social behavior.”

SoCo—Sophomore College, a three week intensive course at the end of yoursophomore summer. Many of these are offered around the world in amazing placesand afford a great opportunity to meet fellow students who share your passions.

Special D—ridiculous, raucous meals hosted at the various residences throughoutthe year. All are themed and most involve gratuitous rally and high thresholds of

merrymaking. Not to be missed. TAP—the Axe and Palm. Located in Old Union, it’s the perfect place to grab snacks,

catch a sports game, or people-watch at any hour of the day.

TressEx—tree sex?!? No, Tresidder Express, the only convenience store on campus,located right across from the Treehouse. Do yourself a favor and grab an It’s-It icecream sandwich.

University—the short version of University Avenue, what Palm Drive turns into as you leave campus. University is home to cafés, ice cream parlors, bookstores, and

boutiques that make it perfect for an afternoon stroll any time of year.


Cardinal Traditions

Stanford Axe—The Axe originally derives from a morbid “Axe Yell” invented at the 1896Big Game. Three years later, the actual physical Axe emerged at a Stanford baseball game.

Yell leader Billy Erb used a broad-axe emblazoned with a Cardinal “”S to chop off the headof a Cal-color-clad teddy bear. At the end of the game, enraged Cal fans stole the Axe,sawed off the handle to make it more portable and concealable, and hid it in a bank vault

for 31 years.

A group of Stanford students known as the “Immortal 21” stole back the Axe in a dar-ing bank heist, and the Axe remained in a Palo Alto bank vault until 1993, when a trucebetween the two schools initiated the use of the Axe as the official trophy of Big Game.These days the Axe Committee is responsible for the protection of the Axe, as well as forleading cheers and yells during football games.



Assassins—A freshman dorm tradition and battle royale, Assassins involves everythingthat makes spy movies great: stealth, treachery, paranoia, and… squirtguns. For about aweek (or more, if your dorm is really good), you and your dormmates have secret as-signments to “assassinate” one another. A take-no-prisoners and winner-takes-it-alldeath-match, Assassins is often a fun addition to an otherwise work intensive winter quar-

ter. If anyone asks, you didn’t see me!Band (LSJUMB)—Is that a stampede? An earthquake, maybe? No, chances are it’s the

one, the only, the truly incomparable Leland Stanford Junior University Marching Band!!Our “marching” band prefers to scatter and has traded in traditional uniforms for tutus,loud Hawaiian shirts, and the occasional penis Speedo. (If you’ve seen it, you know whatI mean.) Famous and infamous, our Band is the garish personification of a counter-cul-ture backlash against traditionally stuffy college marching bands. Feathered caps? Godforbid. Capes (*cough, USC, cough*)? Not likely, unless our drum major is dressing as

Athena. No big deal. It happens.

Here’s a quick primer on some of the more infamous shenanigans of the LSJUMB:

1987, Rolling Stone magazine—“It’s hard for anyone raised on rock to imagine thata band could sound this loud without thousands of watts of amplification.”

1990, University of Oregon: the Band was banned from the state for criticizingOregon’s wildlife protection policies in their halftime show.

1991, Notre Dame: the Band was banned from Notre Dame when the drum majordressed as a nun and used a wooden cross as a baton.

2004, vs. Brigham Young University: the Dollies dressed as brides and the bandmanager proposed to each of them in turn.

Piqued your interest yet? You don’t have to play an instrument to join. All you need iscrazy school spirit and an insane wardrobe. Go Cardinal!

Battle of the Classes—A recently initiated tradition involving goofy carnival activities,loud music, and gratuitous class spirit. _____-TEEN!! The freshmen always win becausethey are shiny, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, but the upperclassmen are too busy enjoy-ing hilariously losing at tug-of-war to care. And if it motivates you: lots of free food andT-shirts.

Big Game—The most epic football game of the year in which the Stanford Cardinaltakes on the dastardly hippies from across the bay. The big day is precipitated by a week’spreparation involving spewing the blood of our enemies from the top of the Claw, mas-sive intimidating signage everywhere, and various Band appearances and shenanigans.This year the game will be at Stanford, so prepare to scream yourself hoarse in the mostintense four quarters of your life.

Cafe Nights—Many and various student organizations hold these informal eveningswhere secretly-wildly-talented ninja artistes among us dazzle with their performance skillz.

Café Nights are fun and laid back, and a great date night idea.Faculty Dinner —Usually sponsored by your dorm or dining hall, these evenings pres-

ent a cool opportunity to invite your favorite lecturer, dreamy IHUM prof (you all knowwho I’m talking about), or superstar researcher to dine and chat. Talk about awesome face-time!

Formal—Like prom. But in college. And with significantly more boats. Don’t forget yournautical-themed pashmina Afghan.




Fountain Hopping—Join the scantily-clad horde of your fellow dormmates and prancethrough Stanford’s plentiful fountains. Ten points for fountain hopping at night. Thirtypoints for running through Meyer Library on your way home.

FMOTQ —Full Moon on the Quad. Once upon a time in the 19th century, male Stan-ford seniors would present female Stanford freshmen with a red rose and a kiss on the

cheek at midnight. These days it’s a full campus party, involving some snogging, lots of Listerine, and rockin’ bands. The outfits (or lack thereof) are often hilarious.

Midnight Breakfast —One night during each Dead Week, esteemed faculty membersserve students breakfast food at dining halls throughout campus. Whether you’re sufferingfrom the munchies or just really want to see your IHUM prof in a chef’s hat, midnightbreakfasts make for an awesome study break.

Primal Scream—It’s hour ten of studying on a Tuesday night during Dead Week, andyou’re flat tired of brushing up on cultural hegemony in the 19th century. What’s that

screaming? Zombie apocalypse?! Nah, just your classmates letting off some pent-up study-ing frustration at midnight. Join them; you’ve earned it.

Screw Your Roommate—It’s not as awkward as it sounds. You and your roommate seteach other up with random people you know and the entire dorm participates in one mas-sive group date. Okay, so maybe it is as awkward as it sounds.

Secret Snowflake—The least G-rated of your freshman dorm-sponsored activities, thistradition involves a week full of secret dares involving scenarios that are just as uncom-fortable to watch as they are to enact.

Ski Trip—Everyone in your dorm piles into a cabin with an occupancy that is approx-imately one-fifth the size of your dorm. Intense bonding, snowball fights, shenanigans,and shenanigans on skis ensue.

SNAPS—Sigma Nu Arts and Poetry Slam. A sweet arts evening hosted on Sigma Nu’slawn showcasing the talents of your fellow students. Berets and hipster glasses encour-aged.

Stacks—For hide-and-seek, tag, making out, or intense studying, there’s nowhere bet-ter than Green’s sound-smothering aisles for some quiet and solitude.

Stanford PowWow—For 40 years, the Stanford PowWow has been one of the largestin the world, and one of the most spirited Stanford student events. Check it out for amind-blowing cultural experience, complete with food, music, dancing, and art.

Steam Tunneling—Only the truly brave venture into Stanford’s underworld, fraughtwith dust, small passageways, and scalding steam pipes. Bring a good guide and leave atrail of breadcrumbs… some never return.

The Game—Like the Amazing Race, Stanford edition. You and a team of friends fol-low super nerdy and intense clues written by your RAs all over Stanford, San Francisco,

and beyond in a 24 hour marathon treasure hunt.

Wacky Walk—Immediately prior to the actual graduation ceremony in the Stanford Sta-dium, graduating seniors showcase their goofy individuality in clever displays of schoolspirit, thanks to Mom and Dad, and silliness as they circle the stadium. You’ll never againsee so many PacMan, Tetris, and balloon-based costumes.




School Spirit Etiquette

things that you need to know how to do

Last year we had one of the top 5 football teams in the nation, and our women’s bas-ketball team consistently makes it into the Final Four. It’s kind of embarrassing when our

sports fans don’t know the proper cheers. Here’s a primer on how NOT to point left whenthe rest of the stadium is pointing right.


Football

Kickoffs—jangle your keys in the air as loudly as you can as the kicker revs up. As heapproaches, yell “ooooOOOOOHHHH” in a crescendo that lets up the moment hekicks the ball.

Third downs for the other team—make as much distracting noise as you can. Yell,bang your hands on the seats in front of you, stomp on your seat, whatever it takes.



First down for us—as soon as the announcer says, “first down, Stanford,” raise bothpointers in the air with another “oh” crescendo. Then immediately point yourfingers down at the field three times, each time “saying oh!” Finally point bothfingers in the direction Stanford is playing and yell, “first down!”

BasketballIntros for the other team—after each opposing player’s name is read, the crowd yells

“sucks.” It isn’t polite… but at least we’re not hockey fans.

Fouls—when the other team fouls us, chant “you-can’t, do-that!” (clap, clap, clap-clap-clap).

Random cheering—one side of the stadium yells “GO!” and the other yells“STANFORD!” It isn’t rocket surgery.

All Right Now—

Timing the jump—during the (usually fairly long bridge), the Band comes to a veryobvious, prolonged crescendo. This is your cue. There will be two particularly loudnotes from the trumpets, then you count, “five, six, seven, eight” and jump as youyell “woo!” Practice early and often.

Parties

Moon Splash / Sun Splash—massive parties hosted by Sigma Nu on the lower row.Some of the best attended parties of the year.

Exotic Erotic—probably the only event you’ll attend where there’s a clothing limit. Two

pieces for girls, one piece for guys. Interestingly enough, very few people seem touse actual clothing for covering up (with varying degrees of success…).

Cowabunga—Sigma Chi’s new pledges transport you to a tropical paradise as theytransform the frat’s front lawn into a sandy beach complete with palm treedecorations. Forget about spring quarter finals and wiggle your toes in the sand.


Assistance League® Costume Bank

With over 3,000 unique costumes, the Assistance League® COSTUME BANK isone of Stanford’s most popular places to fill that need for Halloween or an upcom-

ing rally. Only 15 minutes from campus, just off Foothill Expressway in Downtown

Los Altos, the COSTUME BANK features pirates, Renaissance & other historical cat-

egories, including 20s thru 80s, Santas, Easter Bunnies and other animals, clowns,

show biz, tuxes and tails, Romans and Greeks, etc. Also available are accessories to

purchase, i.e., wigs, masks, hats, etc. The COSTUME BANK is owned and operated

by the non profit Assistance League of Los Altos. It is the chapter’s major fundraiser

to support their special philanthropic programs, including H.O.M.E., The Flora Lam-son Hewlett Apartments, at Stanford Medical Center.

169 State Street (at Third Street), Los Altos

(650) 941-2610

www.costumebank.com, check for specials

[email protected]



Romance

—ANDREA ACOSTA You’ll probably hear people say that there are only two types of relationships at Stan-ford: the weekend hookups and the “we’re-getting-married-next-weekend-can-you-help-with-the-invitations?” situations. The reality of student life, however, shows that ro-mance at Stanford can, like so many things, be a spectrum.

Perhaps the main reason that the aforementioned false binary even exists is that thoseafter-party hookups and long-term relationships seem to eliminate the stress and/or timecommitment that comes from figuring out a good love life in between. Stanford studentsare notorious for not having time for things, and romance comes as no exception to that.

Healthy relationships on campus definitely take work, but I’ve seen it done right, and theycan definitely happen for those who want it.

Have a heavy class load? Intense academics do not equal a lonely existence. Have studydates with your significant other — you’ll be together and be (hopefully) productive atthe same time. And if your partner happens to be in the same classes as you, even bet-ter. Or, just take Friday and Saturday evenings off to chill with her and complain to a sym-pathetic ear about the number of problem sets you just survived. Sometimes, though, itdoes help to take fewer classes — Stanford is far, far more than just its academics, and

it can be easy for some people to forget that. Taking fewer units to explore the rich so-

74 6—C ARDINAL CULTURE

Nomad Party—a recently pioneered phenomenon involving a massive mobile partyon the last night of finals that traverses the entire campus, making numerous,notable stops in libraries. If you have a final on the last day, God help you… youcan usually hear the party from anywhere on campus.

Mausoleum Party—the massive Halloween party thrown by the junior class

presidents at Leland Jr.’s tomb. It would be creepy, but you’re surrounded byapproximately three thousand of your best friends, glowsticks, energy drinks, andtechno.

Wine & Cheese—a low-key, artsy Wednesday night tradition at Kairos. Berets, pennyloafers, and hipster plaids highly suggested.

Stanford Viennese Ball

The 35th Annual Viennese Ball is coming up in February 2012! It's Stanford's largest

annual social dance event, with two ballrooms, live bands, and performances by sev-

eral of Stanford's dance groups.

Three Ways to Get Ready for the Ball:

1. Take social dance classes with Richard Powers, or learn to dance at the waltz,

swing, and salsa lessons organized by the Viennese Ball Committee.

2. Audition to perform with the Opening Committee, or sign up to help organize

the ball!

3. Check out vienneseball.com for more information.



Cheap Date Ideas

Jammix: one of the most underrated date events on campus. Grab a girl/guy and go

swing, waltz, and salsa the night away in Roble Gym with the tons of students whohave (or haven’t!) taken Richard Power’s infamous Social Dance classes. $2; happensabout once every month.

Climb Trees after Midnight : the trees at Stanford are not only climbable, but their fruitis often edible—take your significant other on a unique frolic through campus. Usehttp://trees.stanford.edu for reference.

Hike the Dish at Sunset/Stargaze at the Dish at Night : night or day, the dishprovides the classic beautiful view for your equally beautiful partner. Don’t count onbeing the only ones around though- Stanford students tend to go on runs at the

strangest times.Steam Tunneling: for a more dangerously exciting date, find somebody who actually

knows where the entrance is and proceed to go on an underground, slightly illegaladventure. Cons (or pros): hot, dark, and the risk of being trapped.

Movies from Green Library: rent a heart-melting movie for free from the largestarchive of films outside of Netflix. Be aware though that the Media section of thelibrary often closes by 5:00 pm on most days, so get there early!

Starlight Picnic: Frankly, you can do this on any lawn of campus, but try to avoid the

obvious Oval destination—there are sprinklers and they will go off. Go instead tothe courtyard facing the clock tower at the School of Education or some out-of-the-way location.

Stanford Theater : for a romantic, old-fashioned date night, this gorgeous 1920s-eratheater offers black and white films every weekend for you and your beau’s viewingpleasure.

Gelato on University: after your romantic, old-fashioned movie, go to Michael’s forgelato—it’s practically across the street from the Stanford Theater. And please, nopuns about how sweet she is while eating your cone.

Cactus Garden: Yeah. Stanford has one. For a cool Southwestern vibe, go chill in thecactus garden for a night under the stars.

Arrillaga Alumni Center Fountain: a scenically peaceful place peppered with lemonand lime trees—a ready backdrop to your night of romance.

Papua New Guinea Sculpture Garden: for more artistically inclined couples, checkout this awesome sculpture garden, and maybe even have a scintillating discussionon the aesthetics of art … and people.


cial scene and amazing people is a completely legitimate life-choice and one you’ll bethankful you made before you graduate. Trust me.

And now, the eternal question. How to meet that wonderful, cute, and intelligent otheryou have been looking for all your life. Start by joining the groups that interest you andthe classes you’re passionate about — there’s nothing like having a mutual interest to talk

about on that potentially awkward first date. Go to socials of all kinds, not just the darkand malodorous frat parties. Kairos’ Wine and Cheese on Wednesday nights, StanfordDance’s Salsa Socials, and even department events can be places for finding your match.Oh, and don’t count out the possibility of running into the cutest person, literally, on yourbike.



76 6—C ARDINAL CULTURE

Communication

Listserv: [list-serv], noun—that which allows one to easily send emails to a group of people, all of whom are members of a list the most effectively useful, frequentlyused, and consistently annoying form of communication at Stanford

The creation of listservs makes sense—email is fast, reliable, and a good way of con-tacting a large amount of people on campus at once. It also, however, allows spam andgeneral-unimportance to be broadcasted to the student population on a regular basis. Thestudents know it, and the administration figured it out last year in an infamous attemptby Stanford Housing to sign up all 6,000+ undergraduates onto the same list—a list towhich any and everybody could email all members. Let’s just say, the result was chaos,backed up servers, and jokes about Hitler for weeks (don’t ask).

For Stanford students, it all begins at the activities fair during NSO when hundreds of freshmen give their email addresses to what seems like hundreds of lists—the Stanford

Peace of Mind list, the Undergraduate Creative Writing list, the Psychology Department’slist, and even the Arabesque Middle Eastern Dance list, to name a few. Activity on dif-ferent lists ranges from the relatively chill few emails about important events to the dailyfree-for-all that is Diaspora. To help you manage the fifty new emails that will invade yourinbox the week following your first activities fair, we offer the following advice:

Get Gmail. It’s a lifesaver for those who have inordinate amounts of electronicinformation coming to them from all over campus. Gmail offers more storage,more effective mail organization, and the option of importing any emails sent toyour Stanford inbox into Google’s more spacious quarters.

Set up filters. Aka, save yourself from wasting 30 minutes a day reading email fromsources you don’t currently need to be caring about—especially with thatproblem set due tomorrow morning.

Don’t sign up for lists that you honestly have no interest in. It’s easy as a freshmanto give in to the lonely, pleading eyes of the girl sitting at the StanfordEngineering and Entrepreneurship in Third-World Countries table and sign up,but if you hate math, science, and entrepreneurship, then just don’t do it.

If you do give into the pressure, then unsubscribe—it’s possible. The first email you

get from a list will usually contain a link, which by clicking and followinginstructions, will unsubscribe you and free you from its virtual coil.

Listservs probably aren’t going anywhere anytime soon, so use their power wisely andwell.

uog-2011

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