top 100 funniest one liners 1

Home TOP 100 Funniest One-liners Random One-liners Latest One-liners Jokes Quote Videos Alphabetically Search

Now 7397 one-liners online!

Onelinerdot NET

z- Page 2 -

TOP 100 funniest one-liners, quotes and jokes on the internet! Part 1 http://www.onelinerz.net/top-100-funny-one-liners/

1 of 5 7/2/2010 8:50 PM

Next >

TOP 100 funniestone-liners on the internet!

1-20 21-40 41-60 61-80

81-100

1

I asked God for a bike,but I know God doesn'twork that way. So Istole a bike and askedfor forgiveness.

2

Do not argue with anidiot. He will drag youdown to his level andbeat you withexperience.

3

I want to die peacefullyin my sleep, like mygrandfather.. Notscreaming and yellinglike the passengers inhis car.

4

Going to church doesn'tmake you a Christianany more than standingin a garage makes you acar.

5Sex is not the answer.Sex is the question."Yes" is the answer.

6We live in a societywhere pizza gets to yourhouse before the police.

7

Women might be able tofake orgasms. But mencan fake a wholerelationship.

8The last thing I want todo is hurt you. But it'sstill on the list.

9

Light travels faster thansound. This is why somepeople appear brightuntil you hear them

1147716051

4574

798011067

3087

691910040

3121

62727509

1237

61728643

2471

61297980

1851

60248444

2420

59397943

2004

57667208

1442

TOP 100 runners-up

One-liners that did not make

it to the TOP 100!

Go To Runners-Up

Social Bookmarks

You can add our page to

your favourite social-

networking website like

Facebook, Twitter,

MySpace, Digg,

StumbleUpon,...

One-liner Ads

Ads by AdBrite

Car ReviewsExpert Reviews of LatestMakes and Modelswww.caradvice.com.au

Hip Hop JewelryBling Bling jewelry at LowPrices -- Over 2000styles to Choose Fromwww.HipHopBling.com

Casinos.Net - since1997Poker, Slots, Blackjackand more!www.casinos.net

Up To Date He@lthNewsGet caught up on themost recent health newsand articles @ Healthtriawww.healthtria.com

Become A Dog TrainerWhat you should knowbefore beginning yourdog training career.mydogtrainingadvice.com

Your Ad Here


2 of 5 7/2/2010 8:50 PM

HomeBrowseSearchSubmit a One-liner

One-linersTOP 100Runners-upRandomizerLatest AdditionsQuote Videos

JokesBumper StickersNewspaper HeadlinesThings you don't want to hear during surgeryYo mommaYou know you're getting olderYou might be a redneck

W3C: Valid XHTML 1.0 TransitionalW3C: Valid CSS!

© Onelinerz.net

Home TOP 100 Funniest One-liners Random One-liners Latest One-liners Jokes Quote Videos Alphabetically Search

Now 7397 one-liners online!

Onelinerdot NET

z


3 of 5 7/2/2010 8:50 PM

< Previous Next >

TOP 100 funniestone-liners on the internet!

1-20 21-40 41-60 61-80

81-100

21Fighting for peace is like fucking forvirginity.

22 If sex is a pain in the ass, thenyou're doing it wrong...

23To steal ideas from one person isplagiarism. To steal from many isresearch.

24If God is watching us, the least wecan do is be entertaining.

25If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER fromdiarrhea... does that mean that oneenjoys it?

26If you think nobody cares if you'realive, try missing a couple ofpayments.

27

A bus station is where a bus stops.A train station is where a trainstops. On my desk, I have a workstation..

28Better to remain silent and bethought a fool, than to speak andremove all doubt.

29How is it one careless match canstart a forest fire, but it takes awhole box to start a campfire?

30

Some people are like Slinkies ...not really good for anything, butyou can't help smiling when yousee one tumble down the stairs.

31

Did you know that dolphins are sosmart that within a few weeks ofcaptivity, they can train people tostand on the very edge of the pooland throw them fish?

TOP 100 runners-up

One-liners that did not make

it to the TOP 100!

Go To Runners-Up

Social Bookmarks

You can add our page to

your favourite social-

networking website like

Facebook, Twitter,

MySpace, Digg,

StumbleUpon,...

One-liner Ads

Your Ad Here


4 of 5 7/2/2010 8:50 PM

HomeBrowseSearchSubmit a One-liner

One-linersTOP 100Runners-upRandomizerLatest AdditionsQuote Videos

JokesBumper StickersNewspaper HeadlinesThings you don't want to hear during surgeryYo mommaYou know you're getting olderYou might be a redneck

W3C: Valid XHTML 1.0 TransitionalW3C: Valid CSS!

© Onelinerz.net


5 of 5 7/2/2010 8:50 PM

top 100 funniest one liners 1

Documents