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[2] WEEKLY ALIBI AUGUST 6-12, 2020

COMMUNITY NEWS | by Gwynne Anne Unruh

The Yellow Brick Road Back to SchoolCoronavirus, masks and computer screens line the path to Emerald City

The yellow brick road back to theLand of Education is becomingmore and more like the nightmare

on Elm Street. In the ’60s schools taughtstudents to hide under cafeteria tables tobe safe from the atomic bomb that mightblow up in their backyard. Today theboogieman is lurking in the classroom,and everywhere else besides. It could killyou and your teacher, or you could take ithome and kill Mom and Dad. That’s aheavy burden for anyone. It’s a childhoodbad dream like no other. The only silverlining is you get to wear a colorful masklike your superheroes. Your teachers aremasked too, and some wear hazmat suitsto keep themselves safe.

Parents who have been trying tohomeschool their children are realizingteaching 1 or 2 kids is insanely difficult, letalone 30 of them. Adults who may haveonce thought of teaching as an easy,overpaid profession have gained a newlevel of respect for teachers; any teacherentering a classroom today deserves hero’spay.

While safety must be the mainconsideration, there is no one-size-fits-allapproach to school reopening.Albuquerque Public Schools InterimSuperintendent Scott Elder told APSteachers that while their opening plan isthorough, it does not provide all of theanswers teachers will need, as things arechanging fast and often. APS teachers andschool staff return to school on Aug. 5 toprepare for online and in-school teaching,and learning in a sanitized and safe settingthat includes social distancing and wearingface masks.

“School will begin the week of August12 with the distribution of technology tostudents, virtual home visits, and guidancefor staff, students and families on safelyattending school and effectively learningat home,” Elder explained. Under theplan, which is subject to changedepending on the spread of thecoronavirus and public health orders,students would return to the classroomafter Labor Day on an every-other-weekrotation Tuesdays through Fridays.

In some ways private schools have anedge. Their smaller sizes can make themmore nimble. School administrator ofSalam Academy Fedah Abdelhack saidsince private schools are considered abusiness, they can open at 25% capacity.Kindergarten through second grade willattend the Academy, while third gradethrough high school will be online with

Zoom classes and weekly handout packets.State and CDC guidelines are strictlyenforced, classroom size is capped at tenstudents, and temperatures are takenbefore anyone enters the building.Changes may take place after Labor Day.

“We have ordered some masks for theteachers that are clear so, when teachingthe kids phonics, they’re able to see yourmouth,” Abdelhack said. “With positivereinforcement and encouraging them towear it throughout the day, our 4-year-oldsattending day care this summer didamazing wearing their masks. We’re doingeverything we can possible to ensure thesafety of all of our teachers and students.And hopefully people are patient withdeveloping guidelines,” she said.

The “SCHOOLS MUST OPEN INTHE FALL!!!” tweets from PresidentTrump have not gone over well witheducators. During an interview with CNN,National Education Association PresidentLily Eskelsen García said, “My advice to allparents is please under no circumstancestake medical advice from President Trumpor Betsy DeVos. Especially when it comesto the health of your children. This is avirus that kills people. They are making amockery of the danger they would be in ifyou rush to do this. It is absolutely mind-boggling to me for Donald Trump to have

a press conference, this publicity stuntabout saying I am going to use my bullypulpit—and he does mean bully—topressure people to do something beforeit’s safe.”

At the American Federation of Teachers(AFT) Biennial Convention on July 28,President Randi Weingarten askedattendees, “Why would anyone trustPresident Trump with reopening schools,when he has mishandled everything elseabout the coronavirus? Why would anyonetrust Betsy DeVos, who has zero credibilityabout how public schools actually work?Why would anyone try to reopen schoolsthrough force and threats, without a planand without resources, creating chaos?Unless all they wanted was for it to fail?

“Before the virus’ resurgence, andbefore Trump’s and DeVos’ reckless ‘openor else’ threats, 76 percent of AFTmembers said they were comfortablereturning to school buildings if the propersafeguards were in place,” Weingartensaid. “Now they’re afraid and angry. Manyare quitting, retiring or writing their wills.Parents are afraid and angry, too.”

AFT Convention delegates agreedgovernments at all levels must offerprotections at work sites, such as safeventilation and potable water systems,access to viral and antibody testing, strict

protocols and safety training, adequatepersonal protective equipment, isolationprocedures, self-quarantining policies andother detailed safety measures.

“We need safe, reliable and high-qualitychild care,” said Kathy Chavez, presidentof the Albuquerque Educational AssistantsAssociation, executive vice president ofAFT New Mexico and an AFT vicepresident. “We need to champion this andto fight to see our country provide thefunding that is needed to open child caresafely. But if the authorities don’t protectthe safety and health of those we representand those we serve, as our executivecouncil voted last week, nothing is off thetable—not advocacy or protests,negotiations, grievances or lawsuits or, ifnecessary and authorized by a local unionas a last resort, safety strikes.”

School districts are wondering if they’llhave enough money and employees toreopen. A report released by AFT, found ifthe federal government fails to prioritizeaid to state and local governments, andappropriate direct assistance to publicschools and colleges, nearly 1.4 millionpublic education jobs will be lost, andschools throughout the country will beforced to meet remotely indefinitely.

“Let’s be clear,” AFT PresidentWeingarten told delegates at the AFTconvention. “Just as we have done with ourhealthcare workers, we will fight on allfronts for the safety of our students andtheir educators.

“Congress has a choice—either fundour future and tackle the virus, or meeklysurrender to the triple crisis of thepandemic, the economic recession andstructural racism. We’re facing anunmitigated disaster—and we hope ourcries for help are heeded before it’s toolate,” Weingarten warned her members.“Our nation is at a critical crossroad, andthe decisions Congress and the presidentmake in the next two weeks will be felt forgenerations to come.”

For many families, school is not justabout reading, writing and math. It’swhere their kids get healthy meals, getexercise, access the internet, learn anddevelop social and emotional skills, andhave access to mental health support andmany other things that cannot be providedwith online learning. The yellow brickroad back to open schools is filled withlandmines and looney tunes. Educators aredetermined to defuse the mines, ignorethe looney tunes, and they categoricallyrefuse to be a pawn in a political game. a

Schools are preparing to navigate how to reopen safely this fall. CLARKE CONDÉ

AUGUST 6-12, 2020 WEEKLY ALIBI [3]

COMMUNITY NEWS | by Dan Pennington

Sunday evening a crowd gathered inDowntown for the purpose ofspeaking out against violence

toward BIPOC from police. Theorganizing group, Black New MexicoMovement, was well-managed andcoordinated, ensuring everyone was onthe same page throughout the entireprotest. The message was to be heard andto maintain peace. You can look at ourphoto essay of the event itself in thecenter of the paper this week. This storyis about what happened after everyonecalled it and went home.

As organizers were walking people backto their cars, being sure to travel in groupsfor safety, one pair of people encountereda problem on Third and Central. FromFilling Philly’s a light shone out, pointeddirectly at a protestor’s chest. When theylooked up to see what it was, they saw theNew Mexico Civil Guard stationed withinthe store. An unidentified person insidethe sandwich shop allegedly had a gunaimed at the protestor. From multiplevideos taken at the scene before, duringand after this event, one thing isabundantly clear: There was no riotingtaking place. There was no risk of damageto property. In a story all too familiar,unarmed BIPOC were standing togetheracross the street and were beingthreatened by armed individuals.

APD was called, but the callers weretold they wouldn’t engage in an escalatingsituation, so they would need to dispersetheir crowd before anything could bedone. That was when two loud bangs wentoff. It is unclear if they were gunshots orfireworks—and if they were gunshots, ifthey had been directed or were anaccidental discharge. As of publication noinjuries were reported from the scene.After the reported gunshots, the crowdrapidly dispersed from the scene.

NMCG said on the group’s Facebookpage that they were “monitoring thesituation” in downtown Albuquerque andhad simply stopped by Filling Philly’s to“visit a friend.” Yet there was no sign ofany problems at all when they chose toengage innocent individuals walking totheir cars. Filling Philly’s general managerMarcie Sanner told local news media onTuesday that “a man named Jim Benvieasked militia members to protect therestaurant over the weekend, but he hadno authority to make that request.” Therestaurant tried to further distance itselffrom Benvie in a Twitter post describing

Benvie as “one of our employees [who]acted on his own accord invitingindividuals that have acted in athreatening manner to peaceful protestersduring this weekend’s Black Lives MatterProtest.” Benvie was previously identifiedas the restaurant’s general manager inarticles from KOAT and the Albuquerque

Journal from March and June, respectively.This is not the first time the NMCG

has taken residence within Filling Philly’s,though this time has been the mostovertly direct confrontation. According toa statement on NMCG’s Facebook page,“The building was surrounded andpeople were pounding on windows,pointing weapons at us. We got behindcover and stayed down.” Despite a lack ofvideo evidence backing up NMCG’sexciting tale, it reads like a scene strait

out of a movie Western. By their owndescription, it seems clear that thegroup’s actions were more aboutpretending to be useful and having funthan about supporting local businesses.

The Bernalillo County DistrictAttorney’s Office issued a statement onthe incident, saying, “We have opened aninvestigation into the conduct of the NewMexico Civil Guard during this weekend’sprotest to determine whether a criminalviolation occurred or seek a temporaryrestraining order if necessary.”

As things stand now, there is absolutelyno evidence that justifies a gun to havebeen pulled, pointed and potentiallydischarged. Yet NMCG is still out there,uninhibited by anything or anyone.Racism is still alive and well, no matterwho tries to deny it. This self-styled

militia brought weapons to the Oñatestatue protest in Tiguex Park, and aninnocent man nearly lost his life over it.There was the risk of it happening againlast Sunday, and nothing was done.

Be alert, Albuquerque. Be vigilant. Thishate isn’t us. This gun-toting, militarydress up group doesn’t speak for us,doesn’t represent us. We’re better than allthat anger and hate and will continue toprove that. Stand with your community,Albuquerque. Things may seem hard andscary now, but I promise, there is lightcoming soon. Through the powerful voicescalling for justice. Through the kindnesswe all show each other in our day-to-daylives. In the small compassions we createin interactions throughout our community.We are making the city a place worthloving and growing. a

Community TerrorismNew Mexico Civil Guard draws on unarmed protestors

Filling Philly’s, where the NMCG bunkered down and prepared for violence DAN PENNINGTON

[4] WEEKLY ALIBI AUGUST 6-12, 2020

NEWS | EDITORIAL | by Robin Babb

The Importance of Social Media LiteracySpotting bad actors in social movements

Last weekend the Weekly Alibi made avery intentional decision to notreport on a protest that was

opposing the deployment of federalagents to Albuquerque through OperationLegend. We made the decision not tocover this event after much deliberation,based on the evidence (or, morespecifically, lack of evidence) we had onthe protest’s purpose, origins,organizational affiliations and details. Eversince I have been thinking about thischoice and the instincts that led us all tomake it. Those instincts have everything todo with social media literacy and, perhaps,with the sense of self-preservation thatjournalists tend to learn after working inthe industry for a few years.

The flyer for the event was very simple.It gave a date, a time, a location and a verycursory slogan of a purpose: “Protect NMresidents and 1st Amendment rights.”

On the surface it covers all the bases,and there’s certainly nothing wrong withwanting to protect NM residents and theirFirst Amendment rights. But there were afew red flags around this event flyer andthe Facebook page where we firstencountered it:

• The group was only created on July3—not much history—and had begun withthe group name “BLACK LIVES MATTERNEW MEXICO.” They eventually changedtheir name on July 23, just a few daysbefore the proposed event.

• None of the BLM organizers we knowor have met before were involved with theevent, or with this group.

• In the days leading up to the event,other local Black Lives Matterorganizations publicly distancedthemselves from the event on social media.

• Very few details were given about theevent. No specific demands were listed,nor who, if anyone, would be speaking ator leading the march, nor what roles theywere asking protestors to fill in terms offront line protestors, support or streetmedics.

• Shortly after the event, this groupbecame private on Facebook, preventinganyone not already in the group fromseeing its posts.

It is entirely possible that whoeverorganized the event had the best ofintentions and truly meant to protest fedscoming to occupy our city. They mighthave been young or inexperiencedorganizers who meant well, but didn’tfollow through on the details. That said,we live in the strangest timeline right now,where people can get doxxed or jailedbecause of somebody else’s goodintentions—so, unfortunately, goodintentions aren’t enough.

However, it is also possible that thepeople who organized this event wereacting in bad faith. A rumor that onemember of our staff brought up is that the

event was a phishing front—an attempt togather the personal information ofprotestors and people sympathetic to theBlack Lives Matter movement.

The bit about there not being anyspecific demands related to the protest iswhat made us the most suspicious—despite what many may believe aboutprotests and the people who attend them,these organized events typically havemultiple very specific demands. Forinstance, in a release from the Red Nationlast week regarding a protest they held onFriday, they listed, “We demand animmediate withdrawal of all federal agentsfrom Albuquerque and every city they havebeen deployed to” as one of their severaldemands. Whatever you think about thepolitical agenda they represent, it is anundeniably specific and actionabledemand. In comparison, “Protect NMresidents and 1st Amendment rights” isvague and doesn’t involve any actualproposed changes.

Now, we certainly don’t want to play“good protestor, bad protestor” here, orgatekeep a growing and necessary socialmovement. And we don’t want to makeanybody feel bad for trying to make apositive change happen. But we do want toimpart some lessons about how to readbetween the lines on these social mediaposts and pages so that everyone can staysafe and know what they’re signing up for.

People’s lives can be immenselyimpacted by what is shared on socialmedia, as we’ve seen here very recently

and/or uncredited material fromelsewhere? Do they have no or very feworiginal posts that give you a glance at thehuman behind the page? This is thehallmark of somebody—probably using afake identity—who doesn’t actually engagewith the political discourse themself, butwho wants to make it look like they do.

4, If a group makes public who theirorganizers or even their members are, isthere anybody you know in that list? If youdon’t, investigate those people’s profiles—do they seem legit? Never go to a protestalone or with people you don’t knowpersonally. Seriously.

5. Are they selling something? Literally, dothey have products available for purchaseon their page? If so, selling that product islikely their primary motivation, ratherthan any political or ideological goal.

The best rule of all, though, is to useyour instinct. If a person or a group or apage seems fake or like it’smisrepresenting its actual purpose, itprobably is.

At the Weekly Alibi, we hold ourselves tojournalistic standards that involve notreporting on something when we don’thave all the relevant information about it.These standards also involve not givingairtime to potential bad actors and peoplewho do not have the best interest of thepeople of Albuquerque in mind.

Since it is easier than ever to be a“publisher” of one kind or another thesedays because of social media, all of usought to have similar standards about theinformation or misinformation we put intothe world. Did you find a four-slidegraphic on Instagram that conciselycommunicates a point that resonates withyou, that you would like to share withothers? That’s great! But where did theoriginal poster get their information?What does the rest of their account looklike? Have they said something elsewherethat seems extremist, or like trolling?

They might be sharing bad informationto mislead people or intentionally sowingdiscord among people of the samepolitical mindset. Unfortunately, thesetactics often work—the infighting thatpeople talk about in political or socialmovements is often a result of a bad actorbringing in divisive and extraneous pointsto bait people into arguing or splinteringthe group into factions. Our best defenseagainst these tactics is to know them whenwe see them and not engage.

For more on the “knowing the tactics”bit, we recommend watching a seriescalled “The Alt-Right Playbook” onYouTube. It will help you not only to spotbad actors but also know which politicalarguments are actually worth having andhow to have them. It will also make yougrind your teeth sometimes, but wepromise it’s worth it.

As always stay safe on the wild frontierof the internet and determine for yourselfwho’s trustworthy and who’s not. a

when the New Mexico Civil Guard, thelocal right-wing militia that has deputizedthemselves as armed peacekeepers, postedthe home addresses of two members ofThe Red Nation last week on their publicFacebook page. When this information isshared online, especially with a group asideologically extreme as the NMCG, it isdone so for the purpose of intimidating,harassing and potentially harming thepeople involved.

This is why we must be careful aboutwhat we share and with whom.

So how do you tell the differencebetween a genuine member of themovement and a bad actor? Althoughthere are no hard and fast rules, here are afew that we’ve determined are good litmustests for weeding out the bad guys. Whenassessing a profile or group page onFacebook or any other social media site,ask yourself:

1. The most obvious one: If it’s aperson’s profile, do they have photos ofthemself? If so, do all the photos actuallyseem to be the same person? Or do theylook like stock photos? No photos or stockphotos probably mean it’s a fake identity.

2. Does the page or profile seem toexclusively post things that elicit hate andvitriol from their followers? Is there adistinct bent toward “This is what we’reagainst” rather than “This is what we’refor”? This could be somebody trying to baitprotestors into looking bad online or intodoing something even more stupid.

3. Are their posts mostly reposted

Everyone loves hooded figures on the internet. So mysterious! NEEDPIX.COM

AUGUST 6-12, 2020 WEEKLY ALIBI [5]

WEIRD NEWS

ODDSENDSA

ND

Dateline: MichiganA Kalamazoo sheriff reportedly ordereddetectives to investigate a Facebookmessage that called him fat. According toWWMT in Michigan, Kalamazoo CountySheriff Richard C. Fuller III allegedlyordered detectives to go to the home of aman thought to have sent the message andinvestigate the incident—which was notdetermined to be unlawful. The messageFuller received said, “Your a fat a— whoneeds to go on a diet. Stop us from living.Come get me if you want me tubby as fatb——. [sic]” Reporters were able to get acopy of the police report through aFreedom of Information Act request. Itshowed that the sheriff sent detectives tothe man’s home to warn him that themessage was being considered a threat. Thereport states that the man denied sendingthe message and claimed that his Facebookaccount had been hacked. The man toldreporters that he believed the response wasan overreaction since people post meanthings on the internet all the time. Thepolice report says that the man was warnedabout making similar posts in the future.“While he still had constitutional rights tofree speech,” the report says, “he should becautious about posts that are threats.”Detectives never explained how theinsulting post could be interpreted asthreatening. No charges were filed againstthe man.

Dateline: OhioAn extremely rare blue lobster was savedfrom death by Red Lobster employees. ABCNews reports that Red Lobster employees ata Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio restaurant foundthe uncommon crustacean in their usualfood delivery and decided to call theMonterey Bay Aquarium in California toask for advice. The staff at Monterey BayAquarium contacted the Akron Zoo andwere able to find a permanent home for thelobster there. “The connection between theAkron Zoo and Red Lobster came from aconservation partnership called SeafoodWatch,” Akron Zoo said on social media.“The program, run by the Monterey BayAquarium, strives to help consumers andbusinesses choose seafood that is farmedsustainably and fished in ways to support ahealthy ocean. Both the Akron Zoo and RedLobster are conservation partners withSeafood Watch.” Staff at the zoo rushed toconstruct a new home for the rare animal,named “Clawde” by Red Lobsteremployees. The new living space wasdubbed “Clawde’s Man Cave” by zooemployees. The Akron Zoo said that on onelobster in every two million is born with ablue shell.

Dateline: United KingdomA group of baboons is allegedly armed withweapons like knives and chainsaws andattacking visitors at a safari park inEngland. New York Post reports that the bandof monkeys at the Knowsley Safari Park inMerseyside have been known to rip offwindshield wipers and mirrors from vehiclesin the past. But the stakes were raisedrecently when park-goers said they saw themonkeys carrying weapons like knives,screwdrivers and even chainsaws. Parkemployees say they believe guests have beensupplying the animals with the weapons.“We’re not sure if they are being givenweapons by some of the guests who want tosee them attack cars, or if they’re fishingthem out of pickup trucks and vans,” anemployee told reporters. Park officials denythe accounts, however, and say that armedmonkeys is an urban myth. “We believemany of these stories have grown inexaggeration as they’ve been retold, withembellishment to make the objects that aresometimes found in the enclosure seemmore exciting and unbelievable,” said parkrepresentatives. They added that visiting thepark was as safe as using a fast food drive-thru lane.

Dateline: FloridaA popular Florida television news reporterrecently thanked a viewer who spotted acancerous tumor on her neck and brought itto her attention. According to WKMG inOrlando, Fla. Victoria Price, a reporter withWFLA in Florida, underwent surgery lastweek to remove a tumor, her thyroid andsome lymph nodes. Price counts herselflucky, though, because she might not havecaught the tumor in time had it not been forone concerned viewer who noticed thegrowth on Price’s neck while watching heron TV. The viewer sent Price an email thatsaid, “What concerned me was the lump onyour neck. Please have your thyroidchecked. Reminds me of my neck. Mineturned out to be cancer. Take care ofyourself.” Thankfully, Price followed theadvice. She was diagnosed with thyroidcancer. “Doctor said it’s spreading, but nottoo much, and we’re hopeful this will be myfirst and last procedure,” Price wrote beforeundergoing surgery. Price’s televisioncatchphrase is “8 on your side.” “But theroles recently reversed when I found aviewer on my side,” she said. “I will beforever grateful for the woman who went outof her way to email me, a total stranger. Shehad zero obligation to, but she did anyway.Talk about being on your side, huh?” Theeagle-eyed viewer passed her phone numberon to Price, who said she wants to attempt tocontact the woman once she’s recoveredfrom the procedure. In a special report,Price called the woman her “guardianangel.” The reporter is planning to returnto work after at least a week of recoverytime. According to the American CancerSociety, about 52,890 new cases of thyroidcancer have been detected this year. Womenare reportedly three times more likely todevelop thyroid cancer than men. a

Compiled by Joshua Lee. Email your weirdnews to josh@alibi.com.

social justices causes. UNM Center forResearch has set up an archive of AllenCooper’s papers. August 10, 2020 will beAllen Cooper Day, as it is also his birthday.Councilor Benton said he was a friend ofCooper’s and he is living comfortably at anassisted living in Truth or Consequences.

The 2020 Census also got a shout-outto remind residents to get themselvescounted. Albuquerque, the city proper, hasa return rate of 66 percent. BernalilloCounty overall is responding at a 62percent rate. The state of New Mexicooverall lags way behind at 52.7 percent,while the nationwide return rate is 62percent. Field enumerators are out lookingfor those who have not responded, sothere are no excuses for not beingcounted. It is important, and the OrangeMeanies are working hard to make sure weare not correctly counted.

Taken To TaskThe resignation of Councilor Trudy Joneswas called for by Jim Harvey, ExecutiveDirector of the Albuquerque Center forPeace and Justice. In a guest column in theAlbuquerque Journal on Monday, Aug. 3,Harvey said we should not confuseaccountability with blatant racism. Harveyis referencing the June 29 city councilmeeting where the Council was debatingsupporting African American businesses.Harvey wrote that Councilor Jones, underthe cover of accountability, questioned theability of African Americans to even runbusinesses and suggested recipients shouldgo through business training beforegetting the funding. Harvey is correct,Councilor Jones does not appear to askthat of other businesses getting economicsupport. Harvey also took the big daily ragto task and said it should not cover up forblatant racism by saying Councilor Jones

[6] WEEKLY ALIBI AUGUST 6-12, 2020

Welcome Back, Now Get to Work!Councilors return to tackle helping Burque businesses

COUNCIL WATCH | by Carolyn Carlson

Sliding back into the work mode froma summer vacay can be a rudeawakening. This was true for the

Albuquerque City Council when itreturned to the local government tableafter its summer recess. Councilors faceddown a packed Zoom agenda with no endin sight to the COVID pandemic, andmany questions of how to help the city’sstruggling businesses and residents werehanging in the virtual air at the Aug. 3regular meeting.

More SpacePlaces to get your food, drink andshopping on can apply to get a chunk of a$500,000 bump the city is offering withCARES Act Grant monies. Restaurants,breweries, wineries and retail businessescan apply for money to expand theiroutdoor dining and shopping areas intoparking and even onto some streets. Thecity’s economic development peeps will beadministering the grant money. For moreinformation, go to the city’s Coronavirusinformation page at www.cabq.gov.

Now Now Oxbow A controversial development, that in thisreporter’s opinion is not needed orwanted, was put on hold until the Aug. 17City Council meeting. The Overlook atOxbow proposed development site is eastof Coors and north of St. Pius X HighSchool along Namaste Road on the edgeof the protected Oxbow wetlands along theRio Grande on the city’s near West Side.Gamma Development’s plans for the 23-acre development include 76 homes. InMarch 2019 the city’s EnvironmentalPlanning Commision approved the plan.Opponents appealed the decision, but theland use hearing officer upheld the EPCdecision. Last summer the city council saidthey wanted the EPC to take another lookat the development. Gamma then droppedthe house count to 69 homes and gotanother thumbs up from the EPC. TheCouncil will have a full hearing on thedevelopment at its Aug. 17 meeting.

Shout-OutsCouncilor Diane Gibson gave well-deserved accolades with a proclamation toAgora Crisis Center. Back in 1970 UNMstudents and professors founded one ofthe first crisis centers in the nation. Akinda new partnership with the city hasAgora volunteers answering the phones forthe ABQ Homeless Assistance Helpline at505-768-4357 (HELP). Now that’s how toturn 50 in style. For more information onhow to volunteer or donate to Agora checkout www.agoracares.org.

Allen Cooper, a longtime local anti-warand civil rights leader was honored byCouncilor Isaac Benton for his work andpassion for social justice. Cooper has beena strong supporter of many civil rights and

was only asking for accountability. Righton.

Councilor Klarissa Peña paid back morethan $4,000 for a conference she attendedin Philadelphia where she combined itwith a family vacation. She took threefamily members with her where they alsotraveled to New York and Washington D.C.The total trip cost $6,300 when the citybean counters said it should have only costabout $1,900. Councilor Peña paid backthe difference and is calling for a review ofthe city’s travel policies to be more clear.

Quick Hits•Councilors deferred a debate on what

to do with the Oñate La Jornadainstallation that was in front of theAlbuquerque Museum until the Sept. 9meeting.

•Adopted the Silver Avenue BikeBoulevard Review and itsrecommendations and improvements tothe section of Silver Avenue BikeBoulevard between Yale Boulevard andPaseo Del Bosque Trail.

•Councilors made the move to teardown two nuisance houses—one is at 318Mesilla NE and the other is at 615 ArnoSE. Neighbors having to live near thesetwo places certainly will applaud thesedecisions.

•This one is near and dear to mylibrary-loving heart: Councilors happilyapproved designating the Main Librarylocated Downtown as a City Landmark. a

Send your comments about the City Councilto carolyn@alibi.com.

The next meeting Monday, Aug. 17, 5 p.m.

Council Chambers in the basement of City HallView it on GOV TV 16 or at cabq.gov/govtv

Association ofAlternativeNewsmedia

VOLUME 29 | ISSUE 32 | AUGUST 6-12, 2020

EDITORIAL

MANAGING EDITOR/DIGITAL EDITOR:

Dan Pennington (Ext. 255) danp@alibi.com

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CONTRIBUTING WRITERS:

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STAFF WRITERS:

Robin Babb

Gwynne Anne Unruh

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Expanded outdoor dining is finally moving easily. CLARKE CONDÉ

AUGUST 6-12, 2020 WEEKLY ALIBI [7]

ARIES (March 21-April 19): In her book Sticks,Stones, Roots & Bones, Stephanie Rose Bird reportsthat among early African Americans, there werespecialists who spoke the language of trees. Thesepatient magicians developed intimate relationshipswith individual trees, learning their moods andrhythms, and even exchanging non-verbalinformation with them. Trees imparted wisdomabout herbal cures, weather patterns, andecologically sound strategies. Until recently, manyscientists might have dismissed this lore as delusion.But in his 2016 book The Hidden Life of Trees, foresterPeter Wohlleben offers evidence that trees have sociallives and do indeed have the power to converse. I’vealways said that you Aries folks have great potentialto conduct meaningful dialogs with animals andtrees. And now happens to be a perfect time for youto seek such invigorating pleasures.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Author Joanne Harriswrites, “The right circumstances sometimes happenof their own accord, slyly, without fanfare, withoutwarning. The magic of everyday things.” I thinkthat’s an apt oracle for you to embrace during thecoming weeks. In my opinion, life will be conspiringto make you feel at home in the world. You will havean excellent opportunity to get your personal rhythminto close alignment with the rhythm of creation.And so you may achieve a version of whatmythologist Joseph Campbell called “the goal oflife”: “to make your heartbeat match the beat of theuniverse, to match your nature with Nature.”

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Author Gloria Anzaldúawrites, “I am an act of kneading, of uniting andjoining.” She adds that in this process, she hasbecome “a creature that questions the definitions oflight and dark and gives them new meanings.” Iwould love for you to engage in similar work rightnow, Gemini. Life will be on your side—bringing youlucky breaks and stellar insights—if you undertakethe heroic work of reformulating the meanings of“light” and “dark”—and then reshaping the way youembody those primal forces.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): “Pleasure is one of themost important things in life, as important as food ordrink,” wrote Cancerian author Irving Stone. I wouldlove for you to heed that counsel, my fellow Crabs.What he says is always true, but it will beextraordinarily meaningful for you to take to heartduring the coming weeks. Here’s how you couldbegin: Make a list of seven experiences that bringyou joy, bliss, delight, fun, amusement, andgratification. Then make a vow—even write an oathon a piece of paper—to increase the frequency andintensity of those experiences.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): At times in our lives, it’simpractical to be innocent and curious and blankand receptive. So many tasks require us to beknowledgeable and self-assured and forceful and incontrol. But according to my astrological analysis, thecoming weeks will be a time when you will benefitfrom the former state of mind: cultivating what ZenBuddhists call “beginner’s mind.” The Chinese referto it as Chu Xin, or the mind of a novice. TheKoreans call it the eee mok oh? approach, translated as“What is this?” Buddhist teacher Jack Kornfielddefines it as the “don’t-know mind.” During thisupcoming phase, I invite you to enjoy the feeling ofbeing at peace with all that’s mysterious and beyondyour understanding.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “Almost everything willwork again if you unplug it for a few minutes,including you.” Author Anne Lamott wrote that, andnow I’m conveying it to you—just in time for theUnplug-Yourself Phase of your astrological cycle. Anyglitches or snafus you may be dealing with right nowaren’t as serious as you might imagine. The biggestproblem seems to be the messy congestion that hasaccumulated over time in your links to sources thatusually serve you pretty well. So if you’ll simplydisconnect for a while, I’m betting that clarity andgrace will be restored when you reconnect.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Have you been saving anyof your tricks for later? If so, later has arrived. Haveyou been postponing flourishes and climaxes until

the time was right? If so, the coming days will be asright a time as there can be. Have you been waitingand waiting for the perfect moment before makinguse of favors that life owes you and promises thatwere made to you? If so, the perfect moment hasarrived. Have you been wondering when you wouldget a ripe opportunity to express and highlight themost interesting truths about yourself? If so, thatopportunity is available.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): “I learned to make mymind large, as the universe is large, so that there isroom for paradoxes,” writes Scorpio author MaxineHong Kingston. That would be an excellent task foryou to work on in the coming weeks. Here are yourformulas for success: 1. The more you expand yourimagination, the better you’ll understand the bigpicture of your present situation—and the moreprogress you will make toward creating the mostinteresting possible future. 2. The more comfortableyou are about dwelling in the midst of paradoxes, themore likely it is that you will generate vigorousdecisions that serve both your own needs and theneeds of your allies.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): “Some peoplewill never like you because your spirit irritates theirdemons,” says actor and director Denzel Washington.“When you shine bright, some won’t enjoy theshadow you cast,” says rapper and activist TalibKweli. You may have to deal with reactions like thosein the coming weeks, Sagittarius. If you do, I suggestthat you don’t take it personally. Your job is to beyour radiant, generous self—and not worry aboutwhether anyone has the personal power necessary tohandle your radiant, generous self. The good news isthat I suspect you will stimulate plenty of positiveresponses that will more than counterbalance thechallenging ones.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Capricorn occultistPeter J. Carroll tells us, “Some have sought to avoidsuffering by avoiding desire. Thus they have onlysmall desires and small sufferings.” In all of thezodiac, you Capricorns are among the least likely tobe like that. One of your potential strengths is theinclination to cultivate robust desires that are rootedin a quest for rich experience. Yes, that sometimesmeans you must deal with more strenuous ordealsthan other people. But I think it’s a wise trade-off. Inany case, my dear, you’re now in a phase of your cyclewhen you should take inventory of your yearnings. Ifyou find there are some that are too timid or meager,I invite you to either drop them or pump them up.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): The people who livein the town of Bazoule, Burkina Faso regard the localcrocodiles as sacred. They live and work amidst the100+ creatures, co-existing peacefully. Kids playwithin a few feet of them, never worrying aboutsafety. I’d love to see you come to similararrangements with untamed influences and strongcharacters in your own life, Aquarius. You don’tnecessarily have to treat them as sacred, but I doencourage you to increase your empathy and respectfor them.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Your body naturallyproduces at least one quart of mucus every day. Youmight not be aware of it, because much of it glidesdown your throat. Although you may regard this snotas gross, it’s quite healthy. It contains antibodies andenzymes that kill harmful bacteria and viruses. Ipropose we regard mucus as your prime metaphor inthe coming weeks. Be on the alert for influences andideas that might empower you even if they’re lessthan beautiful and pleasing. Make connections withhelpful influences even if they’re not sublimelyattractive. a

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FREEWILL ASTROLOGY | Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny

[8] WEEKLY ALIBI AUGUST 6-12, 2020

What’s The Buzz With Charter Schools?School choice important during the pandemic

Have a kid with a passion for

foreign languages? How about

a flair for the media or digital

arts? Maybe a budding flamenco dancer?

Or a young Einstein or a novice Marie

Curie? Here in New Mexico there are 96

public charter schools that offer unique,

top-rated educational opportunities for

students with all kinds of passions.

Charter Schools Are

What?Charter schools in New Mexico are

public, tuition-free not-for-profit schools

that are open to all students. New

Mexico does not allow for-profit charter

schools. Our schools are authorized

either through the New Mexico Public

Education Department (NMPED) or

through a local school district such as

Albuquerque Public Schools. All

statewide public schools, charter and

regular, are overseen by the New Mexico

Public Education Commission, which is

an elected body responsible for advising

the New Mexico secretary of education.

Individual charter schools are overseen

by governing councils, or boards, who

assume responsibility for carrying out

the charter school’s charter, vision and

mission. Students are admitted on a

first-come, first-served basis with a

lottery system in place if applications

exceed capacity. There are 26,000

students in the state’s 96 charter

schools.

The Charter School Act enables

parents, teachers and other educators to

get together to create individual schools

and to structure educational curriculum

for different career focuses. For instance,

here in the Albuquerque metro area

there are charter schools that—along

with holding students to the same

reading, writing and arithmetic

standards as any other school—offer

specialized focuses such as media arts,

performing arts including flamenco

dance, math, science and technology,

careers in the health and medical field,

and schools for our deaf students as well

as for our multilingual students.Charter schools are usually given

about five years to get up and runningafter they are granted permission. Thenthey go through a reauthorization

NEWS | SCHOOLS by Carolyn Carlson

process every three to five years andhave to demonstrate strong academicachievement or they get their charteryanked. Here in New Mexico theauthorization, and reauthorizationprocess, is rigorous, and every memberof the schools team is involved. The statePED can be ruthless, as they should bewith public money, and charters areyanked often for non-performance.

Not Always The PopularOneNot everyone thinks charter schools area good idea. Misinformation leadspeople to believe that charter schools arenot public schools and they take publictax money out of the regular publicschools. While in essence it is true thatpublic tax dollars are used to fundcharter schools, they are still publicschools available to all students. Just asthere are bad performing regularschools, there will be bad performingcharter schools. Some teacher’s unionsare resistant to charter school teachers

being among their ranks.

But Sometimes ThePopular OneAccording to the 2020 rankings by USNews and World Report, 7 out of the 10top-performing public high schools inNew Mexico are charter schools.Albuquerque Institute of Math andScience, Cottonwood ClassicalPreparatory School, The Academy forTechnology and the Classics,Arrowhead Park Medical Academy,New Mexico School for The Arts, EarlyCollege Academy and the EarlyCollege High School all made theprestigious list, along with these threetraditional public schools: Los AlamosHigh, La Cueva High and MorenoValley High.

Charter Schools In The

Age of COVIDCharter schools have to follow the state’sreopening guidelines, but they havemore flexibility on how they will teach

during the age of COVID. Charterschool boards, or governing councils,have more local control over theirparticular school’s curriculum. Thisallows for quicker responses with tailoredlesson plans. The PED is allowingcharter and other public schools to beginremote learning as early as Aug. 3. Thenelementary schools can begin a phased-in hybrid approach after Sept. 8—that isif COVID rates level off. Middle andhigh schools can begin a hybrid modelafter the littles.

Amy Biehl High School is one of thefirst charter schools formed inAlbuquerque. It is a popular high schoollocated Downtown in an historicbuilding. This school, along with othercharters, will begin the school yearremotely and then phase into a hybridmodel as the school year progresses (anddepending on how quickly COVIDregresses). Amy Biehl’s website says thatit will not resume a hybrid model of in-person and remote learning until afterSept. 26. Other charter schools will beable to phase in whatever level of hybridlearning is best for each school’steachers, students and staff within theparameters of the state reopeningguidelines.

Round Peg Square HoleIt goes without saying that not allstudents fit into the traditionaleducational boxes that regular publicschools offer. Many students can notafford to go to the private schools thatmay have specialized studies. Charterschools offer unique opportunities toexpand educational opportunities for allstudents. This is especially important inNew Mexico where our traditional publicschools were found to be inadequate inthe landmark Yazzie/Martinez v. State ofNew Mexico education lawsuit ruling,which found the state grossly inadequatein educating public school students—inparticular minority students.

Check Us OutThere is still time to check out andenroll in an area charter school if theeducational opportunities for yourstudent are less than optimal. To learnmore about New Mexico charter schoolsor to find one that fits a particularinterest log on to:www.publiccharterschoolsofnewmexico.org.a

Disclaimer: Carolyn Carlson sits on the

Governing Council for the Media Arts

Collaborative Charter School.

The halls of Amy Biehl just feel a little different right now. CLARKE CONDÉ

AUGUST 6-12, 2020 WEEKLY ALIBI [9]

Councilor’s Trip

InvestigatedThe New Mexico Office of the State Auditorsays the Albuquerque City Council spent toomuch money on a trip.

According to Albuquerque Journal, StateAuditor Brian Colón sent a letter toAlbuquerque Mayor Tim Keller and the CityCouncil last week that accused City CouncilorKlarissa Peña of violating city policiesregarding reimbursement. Colón said hisoffice investigated a 14-day trip to 3 EastCoast cities that Peña took in 2019. Theinvestigators reported “several concerninginstances of failure to follow and or enforceregulations and policies” during the trip thatled to more than $4,000 in extra costs.

Last summer Peña traveled to the NationalLeague of Cities conference in Philadelphia,then to New York City for a family trip, then tomeet with the state’s congressional leaders inWashington, D.C. The councilor took herfamily and rode by train, because she has afear of flying. Peña defended the New Yorktrip—which was not related to citybusiness—by saying that returning toAlbuquerque and then going back to the EastCoast two days later would have been moreexpensive.

The investigation estimated that the tripshould have cost $1,916, but the city paid$6,352.

Colón’s letter asked the city to provide a“corrective action plan” within 30 days.

Lujan Grisham Looking

For Cabinet SpotFor months Gov. Michelle Lujan Grisham hasbeen on the rumored short list of potentialrunning mates for Democratic presidentialcandidate Joe Biden. While political analystssay it’s increasingly unlikely that she’ll get theopportunity to serve as vice president, sherecently told reporters that she’d be willing toaccept a role in Biden’s cabinet.

Santa Fe New Mexican reports that LujanGrisham has an eye on becoming Secretaryof the Department of Health and HumanServices under Biden. The governor is said tohave a better chance at obtaining thatappointment, due to her previous experienceas New Mexico Secretary of Health.

Lujan Grisham’s office told reporters that arole in Biden’s cabinet is only speculative, andthe governor’s top priority is still New Mexico.

Health Order ExtendedThe governor has extended a public healthorder that limits public gatherings throughAugust.

According to KRQE occupancy restrictionsfor businesses and churches will remain inplace for the time being, and mass gatheringsremain prohibited. The governor said thateven though restrictions will remain in place,New Mexico’s statistics are improving.

According to a new graph that waspresented during a recent press conference,the seven-day average of hospitalizationsand deaths was shown to have improveddramatically compared to April and May.Lujan Grisham said if the numbers improve,the state might relax some restrictions bySeptember. a

NEWS CITYBY JOSHUA LEE

Legacy Academy Goes MasklessSchool will open in-person day one, no masks required

Our children are our future. It’s thephrase tossed around a lot,especially by older generations.

Ironically, though, this country seems to bestaunchly against protecting the future,especially lately. As if school shootingsbeing such a frequent encounter thatbulletproof backpacks became a thingwasn’t enough, now children are staringdown the barrel of a new gun: high risk ofCOVID-19 infection.

There’s not a single person on thisplanet who believes children are going tobe able to follow COVID guidelines forback to school. The idea of a 6-year-oldnot fidgeting with a mask, wiping theirnose on everything and keeping a 6-footdistance from classmates is nearly comical,as we all have at least some experiencearound kids. The debate of reopeningschools is one we dive into a little deeperin this issue between Gwynne AnneUnruh’s article and Carolyn Carson’s, so Iwon’t go into the intricacies they cover, butI will talk about those going against thegrain.

Legacy Church Academy, a privateschool centered around the namesakechurch, has announced that it will bedoing in-person classes from day one ofschool reopening, and that it will not beenforcing masks. If this sounds like theperfect breeding ground for a COVIDoutbreak, well, that’s because it is. Toexpect a child to always sneeze into theirarm, or to not touch every conceivablesurface available in a room is eitherignorance or naivety. Contrary to popularbelief, children can contract thecoronavirus just like the elderly. Thoughthey may experience no symptoms at all,some can. With or without symptoms,however, they are still able to share thevirus with others. Here’s the scene: LegacyChurch Academy will be doingtemperature checks and sending peoplehome with visible symptoms. Someone isan asymptomatic carrier, comes to classand will almost definitely infect some, ifnot all, of the class—teacher andadministrative staff included. With a two-week incubation period, this will

potentially hit the entire school, includingthe parents of said children. Hopefully,none of those parents work in a physicalbuilding, where they will carry it to theirco-workers. Hopefully, those kids won’tpass it to other family members that theymight not be properly distancing from.Hopefully, this won’t be ground zero for animmense outbreak.

But this is 2020, the year “hopefully”died an aggressive and terrible death. Weknow that by the time schooladministrators realize an infected studentwas on-site, it will already be too late.According to privateschoolreview.com,Legacy Church Academy has 215 students,but assuming most come from a standardnuclear family of four, plus an estimate of25 staff members who we will assume areall single and live alone and practiceperfect social distancing so as to not infectanyone else, we’ll reach an estimate of 885people infected from one student.

That’s just students, their immediatefamily and school staff members. Thisdoesn’t factor in the staff ’s family, theparents’ co-workers, their extended familyor anyone they might come into contactwith in their normal day-to-day life. Usingthe very low 0.01 percent mortality rate,that comes to around 9 students dying.

I don’t pretend to be an expert, andmaybe there are some areas my mathcould be improved, but on the whole,everything here is very likely and as closeas we can get to a solid estimate. What’smore worrying is that a school you’retrusting to teach your children is blatantlyignoring basic science to ... prove a point?Earn a buck? It’s hard to say why, as whenwe reached out to them for comment, theysent us to voicemail. We had not received areply at the time of publication. The pointis they are refusing to believe widelyagreed-upon science, or they don’t careabout the safety of their kids. So maybe wecould look at it from a different angle.Their average tuition is $5,540. If 9children will potentially die from a singleoutbreak, the school would lose $49,860.After all, children are the future … of theirfinancial support. a

CLARKE CONDÉ

NEWS | SCHOOLS by Dan Pennington

[10] WEEKLY ALIBI AUGUST 6-12, 2020

salty rivulets making their way down my

face before I’ve even had my morning

coffee. It feels like a heavy heart, a heavy

chest, heavy arms and sluggish limbs. It

feels like dismay, horror, terror, rage and

outrage all rolled into one.

What does fascism feel like? For me

today, it feels like deep, deep, deep, deep

grief.

By: Cathleen Wilder, local citizen a

Afew days ago a dear friend sent

me an article about protestors in

downtown Portland, Oregon who

had been abducted by unlabeled US

agents, put into unmarked vehicles and

held for hours without probable cause.

The New York Times has corroborated

these accounts. Yesterday, I learned that

35 of these agents had been sent to

Albuquerque, New Mexico where I now

live.

This morning I awoke with tears

because I am seeing my worst nightmare

come to life in this country—and my

city—right now. I do not believe it is a

coincidence that the president is

planning to send all of these agents to

blue cities in blue states, just in time to

instill fear of dissent before the

forthcoming election. (None of the state

and local governments slated to be

invaded by these forces want these quasi-

military entities installed in their

jurisdictions.) This week, that same

president evaded the simple question by

a Fox news anchor: “Would you accept

the results of the upcoming election?”

His chilling answer? “I have to see.”

I wish it hadn’t been so easy for me to

connect the dots.

So today I am grieving. I am grieving

the loss of essential freedoms and

assumptions that I have been able to rely

upon, at least in part, since I was born in

the United States 60 years ago: political

and civil norms that are being upended

with every Tweet, word, action and willful

non-action of this president. Basic

decorum, rational civic discourse, rule of

law and the tenants of Constitution itself

have been replaced with double talk,

disinformation, divisive speech, disdain

for science, disdain for venerable

institutions and, ultimately, flagrant

disdain for any person, group of people

or even fact that fails to cajole him or

completely bend to his will.

Today these accelerated threats to our

democracy, the accelerated placement of

authoritarian tools such as goon squads in

cities like my own feel like this: warm,

EDITORIAL | TOWN SQUARE by CATHLEEN WILDER

It Feels Like FacismWords of protestor abducted in July hit home for local citizen

If you are a member of a New Mexico-

based social, political, charity, educational

or arts organization that would like to

write an editorial/opinion piece on a

specific topic relevant to local readers,

please contact editorial@alibi.com.

Please use the subject line:

Town Square.

LITTLEROCK.AF.MIL

AUGUST 6-12, 2020 WEEKLY ALIBI [11]

FILM | IDIOT BOX by Devin D. O’Leary

In these confusing, contentious andpotentially contagious times, we allneed a simple, soothing balm for our

troubled souls. Thankfully, the Muppetshave arrived just in time to send us on aguileless, guilt-free trip back to ourcollective childhood. Disney+ hasrevived and reinvented Jim Henson’siconic, felt-covered creations for theumpteenth time with the timely weeklyseries “Muppets Now.”

The last televised iteration of TheMuppets came in September of 2011,when ABC’s “The Muppets” recast thepopular puppets in a mockumentaryseries following the behind-the-scenesantics of Miss Piggy’s fictional late nighttalk show “Up Late With Miss Piggy.” Theshow only lasted until March of the nextyear, pumping out 16 decreasinglypopular episodes. It was sharply written,placing the characters in a slightly moregrown-up setting, but it failed to attract anaudience. The cutthroat world of networktelevision (as opposed to the moribundworld of vaudeville theater, the backdropof their classic 1976 to ’81 series “TheMuppet Show”) seemed like an inspiredidea. But it made the Muppets more likereal-life working stiffs, just like thosepopulating a thousand other workplacesitcoms. The situation robbed them ofsome of their outrageous and imaginativeslapstick appeal.

“Muppets Now” doesn’t try to reinventthe wheel. Kermit, Miss Piggy, Gonzo, FozzyBear and the rest of the gang are stillwould-be entertainers. Only now they’restuck working at home (like so many oftheir audience), communicating through acomputer desktop and trying to downloadepisodes of various, shot-on-the-fly

segments for digital streaming. Poorperpetual stagehand Scooter is tasked withjuggling a myriad of Muppet personalities,their various demands and their technicalinabilities—most of which are moot as theshow needs to be uploaded, like, right now,and there’s no time for corrections. Theresult is a welter of diverse segmentsspotlighting a wide variety of Muppet faves.

The individual segments are prettymuch what you’d expect: Miss Piggy hosts alifestyle show, Dr. Bunsen Honeydew andBeaker attempt their usual scienceexperiments. Kermit interviews celebrities,“Actor’s Studio with James Lipton”-style.The Swedish Chef, of course, has a cookingsegment. It’s funny, how, after more than 40years on the air, the Muppets still seem socurrent. What is Miss Piggy but a templatefor vain reality show stars like KimKardashian? Dr. Honeydew and Beakerhave a direct line of lineage to TV

close and personal with “icons of the beautyworld.”

“Mapleworth Murders” (Quibi streaminganytime) “Saturday Night Live” bigwigs LorneMichael’s and Seth Myers are the executiveproducers of this silly satire of BBC-style murdermysteries. “SNL” grad Paula Pell, “30 Rock” starJohn Lutz and comedian J.B. Smoove star.

“ShaqAttack” (Discovery 7:01pm) After enduringa “shark encounter” during 2018’s Shaq DoesShark Week, former baller Shaquille O’Neal is on amission “to determine what shark has the perfectpredatory attack.”

TUESDAY 11“America’s Book of Secrets: Special Edition”

(History 7pm) History Channel offers upexclusive, behind-the-scenes access to some ofour country’s most iconic locations andclandestine organizations.

“Will Smith: Off the Deep End” (Discovery7pm) Actor Will Smith dives into shark-infestedwaters. Evidently, in 2020, sharks themselves areno longer interesting. We need celebrities likeMike Tyson, Shaquille O’Neal and Will Smith inthe water to make us pay attention.

WEDNESDAY 12

“(Un)Well” (Netflix streaming anytime) Netflix’slatest docuseries digs into how well “wellness”trends live up to their hype. a

THIS WEEK IN SLOTH

FRIDAY 7Howard (Disney+ streaming anytime) The late

Howard Ashman—the playwright and lyricist whocollaborated with composer Alan Menkin on suchDisney Classics as The Little Mermaid, Beauty and theBeast and Aladdin—gets the biopic treatment.

“The Magic School Bus Rides Again: Kids in Space”(Netflix streaming anytime) Magic School Buswriter-creator Joanna Cole passed away in July.Netflix keeps the magic alive, though, with this 45-minute special

“Wizards: Tales of Arcadia” (Netflix streaminganytime) The Guillermo del Toro-produced trilogyof animated shows known as “Tales of Arcadia”comes up with its final fantasy, adding “Wizards” tothe already interconnected mythology of“Trollhunters” and “3Below.”

“The Oprah Conversation” (Apple TV+ streaminganytime) Oprah finally gets back to a talk show(ish)format with this one-on-one interview series inwhich the TV icon grills “newsmakers, thoughtleaders and masters of their craft.”

“Being Rueben” (KWBQ-19 8pm) Fourteen-year-oldgenderqueer Welsh singer/makeup artist/socialmedia influencer Reuben de Maid pursues hisdream of becoming an internet sensation in CW’snewest reality series.

SATURDAY 8“Diesel Brothers: Monster Jam Breaking World

THURSDAY 6An American Pickle (HBO Max streaming anytime)

Seth Rogen stars as an immigrant worker who fallsinto a vat of pickles in 1920s Brooklyn and findshimself perfectly preserved for 100 years. Wakingup in 2020, he attempts to adjust to life inmodern-day, hipster-filled Brooklyn.

“Hitmen” (Peacock streaming anytime) MelGiedroyc and Sue Perkins, hosts of “The GreatBritish Bake Off,” reunite for this sitcom about acouple of best friends who just happen to work asprofessional killers.

“Star Trek: Lower Decks” (CBS All Accessstreaming anytime) The Star Trek universeexpands in an interesting new direction with thisanimated comedy about life among the gruntworkers on the “lower decks” of a Federationstarship. The show comes to us from MikeMcMahan, a writer and producer on “Rick andMorty.”

“Upright” (Sundance Now streaming anytime)Australian comedian/actor/writer/musician TimMinchin (he wrote the Broadway adaptations forMatilda and Groundhog Day) stars in this eight-partmusical drama about a shabby musician drivingacross Australia with nothing but an upright pianowhose journey becomes more complicated by theaddition of a runaway girl.

The Show Must Go On“Muppets Now” on Disney+

STREAM TIMEBY DEVIN D. O’LEARY

NetflixAdding Aug. 8: The Promise, We

Summon the Darkness

Adding Aug. 10: Nightcrawler, The

Lost Husband

Adding Aug. 11: Mr. Peabody &

Sherman

Adding Aug. 12: Scary Movie 5

Leaving Aug. 8: 6 Days, Judy Moody

and the Not Bummer Summer, St.

Agatha

Amazon PrimeAdding Aug. 6: The Peanut Butter

Falcon

Adding Aug. 10: Capone, Hard Night

Falling, Lucky Day

HuluAdding Aug. 6: The Peanut Butter

Falcon, Slay the Dragon

Adding Aug. 10: Hard Night Falling,

Lucky Day

Adding Aug. 11: Alive and Kicking,

Monster’s Ball

Disney+Adding Aug. 7: Hidden Kingdoms of

China, Prince of Persia: Sands of Time,

The Peanuts Movie, X-Men a

Records” (Discovery 6pm) Mud-caked monstertrucks try to break a string of world records in thisthree-hour truckathon. Discovery will sell you thewhole seat. But you’ll only need the edge.

SUNDAY 9“Apocalypse Earth” (History 7pm) History

attempts to lift our pandemic-sunk spirits byshowing us the various ways in which nature(volcanos, hurricanes, earthquakes) could destroyall of civilization as we know it.

“Tyson vs. Jaws: Rumble on the Reef” (Discovery7:02pm) Discovery kicks off Shark Week with a(hypothetical) head-to-head competition betweenformer boxer Iron Mike Tyson and the ocean’sdeadliest apex predator. Watch out. One of themhas got a mean bite.

“We Hunt Together” (Showtime 8pm) Thisimported BBC thriller pits a couple with a lust forviolence against a pair of detectives determined toput an end to their murderous spree. Eve Myles,from the “Doctor Who” spin off “Torchwood,”heads the cast.

“YOLO: Crystal Fantasy” (Cartoon Network 1am)Two Australian party girls get into trouble in theAdult Swim block’s latest brain-meltingly weirdcartoon.

MONDAY 10“About Face” (Quibi streaming anytime)

Model/actress Rosie Huntington-Whiteley gets up

experimenters such as “Mythbusters.”While The Swedish Chef was conceived ofas a parody of Julia Child and the like, wehave entire networks dedicated to cooking,both amateur and professional, these days.Tell me Statler and Waldorf weren’t madefor Yelp. And while we’re makingcomparisons, why hasn’t Gonzo beenrestyled as a “Jackass”-like video prankster?

Clearly shot in the puppeteers’ ownhomes and filled with a bit moreimprovisation than previous iterations,“Muppets Now” is mostly hit and miss. Thebest bit so far is probably the SwedishChef ’s “Ookey Dookey Cooking”—mostlybecause it revels in pure Muppet silliness.All of the Chef ’s slapstick cooking “skills”are on display and amped up in“competition” with a real chef, a la “BeatBobby Flay.” Other segments featuring“guest stars” (appearing mostly via Zoom)lack the zest of “The Muppet Show”segments—which forced the guests toperform often ridiculous variety acts.Simply chiming on a laptop computer isn’tnearly as funny. But it’s what we’re stuckwith these days.

Disney+ is only releasing one episodeper week, so there will be a long settling-inperiod in which we get to see what worksand what doesn’t with “Muppets Now.” Thestreaming internet segment format is asolid base from which to launch. It affords agreat deal of latitude and allows TheMuppets to be their own, scruffy selves(something the last ABC show kind of lost).At the end of the day, The Muppets arebeloved characters no matter what they’redoing. If the writers, producers andperformers can find a way to break throughthe formulaic segments and embrace a bitmore of the original show’s manic and

anarchic spirit, “Muppets Now” will makefor a joyful weekly treat. a

“Muppets Now” is streaming weekly on

Disney +.

DISNEY

[12] WEEKLY ALIBI AUGUST 6-12, 2020

T he message could not bemore clear: Black LivesMatter. With a peaceful

gathering held in downtownAlbuquerque this past weekend, thestatement that rang truest with thecrowd was, “We just want to live.” Thisisn’t a space for my thoughts or input,but a way to give a platform to thevoices that are calling for justice,equity and safety in their community.If you can’t hear those calls for basicneeds to be met, then you are notlistening.a

NEWS FEATURE | by Dan Pennington

ALL PHOTOS BY DAN PENNINGTON

AUGUST 6-12 2020 WEEKLY ALIBI [13]

NEWS FEATURE | by Dan Pennington

[14] WEEKLY ALIBI AUGUST 6-12, 2020

“The future is unwritten,” or sosays Joe Strummer, but onething is clear: It’s going to be

a very different year at the College of FineArts at the University of New Mexico,begi nning with a new dean, Harris Smith,and obviously, continuing on with newways to teach given the global pandemic.Weekly Alibi sat down on the campus of theUniversity of New Mexico with Smith onthe morning of his first day on the job totalk about his background, his goals forthe school and how students are going tobe able to learn in this very differentenvironment. The following is an editedversion of that conversation.

Weekly Alibi: What brought you toUNM?Harris Smith: The possibilities of growth.What really got me excited was the idea ofthe interdisciplinary programs, workingwith the various programs within thecollege and the university. I found anappealing potential for growth there forour students to be able to take advantageof—like the relationship that’s beendeveloped with Netflix. Hopefully thatNBC studios will be built pretty soon here.I liked the whole idea of combiningeducation with professional connections. Ifound that appealing because that’seventually where our students are going toend up, in the professional world. If thatcan happen sooner, rather than later, weshould take advantage of it. Because that’swhat we’re telling our students, especiallyin the fine arts. We’re trying to preparethem for the real world. If they can makethose connections sooner, the better. It’salso more challenging for folks in the finearts to make those connections. Otherdisciplines have internship programsavailable, possibly all four years of theirtraining. It’s a little bit more of achallenge for us in the arts to do that.

Tell me a little bit about yourbackground.I was an actor, a stage combat teacher andfight director. That’s what got me into thebusiness and where my passion lies. That’swhere I spent most of my time, actingprofessionally in theater and film. Then Iended up getting certified as a teacher instage combat and teaching a lot of stagecombat, then eventually being a fightdirector as well. That’s where I made mybread and butter.

I’m sure the question everybody’swondering is how are we going toteach at the University of New Mexicothis year? For instance, how do youteach theater or voice performanceremotely?I’ll give you the same answer thateveryone else has been giving you: We’ll

wait and see. We’ll continue to wait forwhatever guidelines they give us from thegovernor down to the president of theuniversity. Our main mission is to give ourstudents the best quality educationpossible. We learned last spring. Eventhough I was at [the University of] Utah, Iknow they were doing the same thing herein New Mexico. We were able to get prettydarn creative d elivering our curriculum toour students using virtual means. Our firstcommitment is to make sure our studentsare getting the quality education they gotwhen it was live. Yes, there are going to bechallenges. We’re not going to have asmany classes live as we’d like. The onesthat are going to need to be live, we’llfigure something out. I’ve been impressedwith the chairs of the departments here.They’ve come up with some creative ideasto make sure that that curriculum isdelivered to the students. Otherwise, thevirtual things they can do virtually, andthey’ll explore those options. Some of the

ARTS | INTERVIEW by Clarke Condé

How is UNM Going to Work?A conversation with the new dean of the College of Fine Arts.

traditional lecture classes are going to beeasy to deliver online. Some of those livecourses, that’ll be the challenge, but the[department] chairs have come up withsome good ideas on how to approach that.

Can you give me an example?One they’re talking about is using tentssomewhere here on campus. They hadmentioned that that can give them theroom and the social distance that theyneed for instruction. You can limit thenumber of people, depending on themajor or how advanced the course.Usually, with most any curriculum, thefarther up you get, the more advanced thecurriculum, the smaller the classes are. So,for some of these courses, it may not evenbe an issue. When you look at some ofthose courses where there are only maybe10 to 15 students, down to if it’s agraduate course, 4 to 6 students, it maynot even be an issue.

CLARKE CONDÉ

Teaching stage combat is probablyout.Well, you can’t have a sword in yourliving room. The Society of AmericanFight Directors, SFD, has madeadjustments for students to be taughtonline so they can still get certified in aweapon or test in weapons. I haven’t hadthe chance to delve into it, but they’vemade it clear that they want instructionto continue for students. Now, like I said,I don’t know how you’re going to swing abroadsword in the middle of your livingroom, but they’re trying to address thoseissues because they want the instructionto continue.

You mentioned partnerships withindustry. What other goals do youhave as Dean of the School of FineArts?I’d like to create more partnershipswithin the university, with anyone in theuniversity, especially when it comes to thegrand challenges that the president [ofthe University of New Mexico] talkedabout. Trying to work with the arts in thehealth and science industry to help bringthose issues to attention. I believe one ofthem was successful aging. Trying to finda way to partner with them as well as thewater resource issues. And then drugaddiction issues. I think the arts can havean impact on all of those. You know,we’re artists. We tell stories in variousways that will help bring attention tothose issues. We can find plenty ofcreative ways by working with thedifferent folks in those areas to bringattention, get more help and support inthose areas.

So, interdisciplinary work with otherparts of the university. What aboutwithin the School of Fine Arts itself? The most obvious one within the college,for example, let’s say if we wanted to do afilm project that involves everyone. Youneed actors from the theater department.You need designers to design a set, eitherthat’s theater or it could be folks in theart department. You need someone tofilm it, so you have your film andemerging media. You have the emergingmedia folks who may end up creating avirtual set. If you want to score the film,there’s the music department. So, rightthere as an easy interdisciplinary projectthat you can create for your students.

Any other goals?I’m excited to be here. There’s so muchpotential. This seems like I timed it to behere at the right time when everyone’sready for change. I’m excited to take thenext step forward with the University ofNew Mexico and put us on the map as aworld-class university. a

Harris Smith outside the School of Fine Arts at the University of New Mexico

with obligatory lobo sculpture in the background

AUGUST 6-12, 2020 WEEKLY ALIBI [15]

It is safe to assume at this point thatschool pictures are off this year. Goodriddance, some may say, with their dull

sameness. School pictures lack the kind ofcreative expression that is commonplacenow with the ubiquity of camera phonesand a youth culture of perpetual self-documentation and curation. A relic of adifferent time valued only by dustygrandmothers, the era of school picturesmay have already been behind us withoutthe interference of a global, school-shuttering pandemic. But in the world ofAlly Burke, school pictures are reimagined,much like Nirvana reimaged the pep rally.

Burke’s Phantom Phases, now on exhibitat the Stranger Factory, is a series ofsurreal portraits she created duringquarantine. They are straightforward likeschool pictures; just the head andshoulders, maybe a smile, but these are thefreaky kids in class. Dark and extra creepy,they are little nightmares suitable forframing. While the paintings are petite(“Knowledge is Sour” is 5” x 7”), I couldeasily imagine them as wallet-size prints,

School PicturesAlly Burke’s Phantom Phases

carefully cut apart from a sheet of eightand handed out to relatives atThanksgiving. Just look at how our littlemonster has grown! Phantom Phases is anexceptional series worth seeing byappointment or online from the ever-evolving work of Ally Burke.

On a sad note, the Stranger Factoryrecently announced that they will beclosing their Nob Hill location at the endof August. They are relocating to a largespread in Algodones with the intent tohost visiting artists and continue thegallery side of their operations. All thebest to them in their future endeavors. Ilook forward to taking the drive northwhen they are ready to show what theyhave become. a

ARTS | ARTS MAGNIFIED by Clarke Condé

Phantom Phases

By Ally Burke

On exhibit (by appointment)

through Aug. 31

Stranger Factory

3411 Central Ave. NE

CLARKE CONDÉ

New for teensat Albuquerque Museum

is a new resource for teen artists offered by

Albuquerque Museum. Expand your art making

abilities or try something entirely new. Browse

video lessons that explore a variety of techniques,

artist designed color pages, and creative

exercises to keep your mind active.

art. history. people.

Get inspired and get creative.

ALBUQUERQUE MUSEUM

2000 Mountain Road NW

Albuquerque, NM 87104

505-243-7255

cabq.gov/museumtrending

anywhere at any time!

Make

Teen

Corner“Knowledge is Sour” by Ally Burke

[16] WEEKLY ALIBI AUGUST 6-12, 2020

DOWNTOWN

MÁS TAPAS Y VINO125 Second Street NW, 923-9080 • $$[Spanish] As its name reveals, the focus of this restaurant

is tapas—dainty plates of beautifully presented succulent

morsels. And, as you may have guessed, there’s vino aplenty.

Best of all, though, is the space, inside historic, renovated

Hotel Andaluz. We recommend trying a glass of sherry with a

plate of assorted Spanish cheeses.

PARK AVENUE PIZZERIA900 Park Ave SW, 242-2939[Pizza, Italian] This hidden Downtown gem (formerly known

as Firenze) serves simple, delicious pizza. Additionally, they

have salads and desserts available. They also cater, dragging

their wood-burning stove wherever they go. They even deliver

to those within a 1.5 mile radius of their location. The

Salsiccia pizza is insanely savory.

FAIRGROUNDS

FRANK’S FAMOUS CHICKEN ANDWAFFLES400 Washington St NE, 712-5109 • $$[American] You know what’s good here? The chicken. Also,

the waffles. Ex-Lobo basketball player Frank Willis’ food has

proven to be a staple in the Burque foodie scene. Willis and

family know their way around a kitchen and serve up some

great soul food, from the titular combo platter to cheese grits

and beef hotlinks.

GEN KAI110 Louisiana Blvd NE, 255-0112 • $$[Japanese, Seafood, Sushi] Rising up from the asphalt

sea of the Talin Market parking lot, Gen Kai is a Japanese

restaurant that offers an oasis from the heat and chaos of

the International District. Sushi is on hand, naturally, and

salt-brothed ramen, but the real star here are the donburi

bowls. Our favorite is the oyako don, in which dashi-soaked

rice is topped with a fried combination of chicken and egg

with two forms of onion: bulb and green.

KAP’S COFFEE SHOP AND DINER

5801 Central Ave NE, 232-9658 • $

[Diner, New Mexican] This venerable Route 66 diner has

been kicking around various locations on Central for about

40 years now. True, after an extensive remodel, the interior

isn’t quite period accurate for the Mother Road’s golden age,

but the decor straddles the line between kitschy and classy

quite nicely. The menu remains decidedly old-school with the

requisite hot cakes and huevos rancheros, and so do the

prices.

MIDTOWN

AMORE NEAPOLITAN PIZZERIA3600 Cutler Ave NE Ste 3, 554-1967 • $$[Pizza] This pizza is so good it’s certified. There aren’t many

places in ABQ to get real Neapolitan pizza, but Amore’s

owners are officially endorsed by the Associazione Pizzaiuoli

Napoletani. The pies feature house-made mozzarella, dough

and sauce. The salads are fresh and organic, and you can

stay indoors or go out on the Green Jeans patio to eat your

slice of heaven. That’s Amore!

NOB HILL

BLUNT BROS COFFEE4400 Central Ave SE, 695-2767[Coffee/Tea/Espresso] Let’s be clear about something.

This isn’t a Starbucks, and if you’re expecting the kind of

snappy service you get at the nation’s largest coffee chain,

you’re going to be disappointed. Instead, expect a bit of

small talk and then a wait while one of the Brothers (none of

whom are named Blunt and some of whom might actually

be Sisters) puts your order together. With just a little

patience on your part, though, you’ll soon be treated to

some excellent brew that will put the corporate stuff to

shame. Definitely try the Magic mocha and Corey’s Coo Coo

Nut.

MATANZA3225 Central Ave NE, 312-7305 • $$[New Mexican, Fusion] The cuisine here goes by the

moniker “progressive New Mexican,” which seems to mean

adding green chile to a cubano sandwich, duck to a tamale

and the like. More impressive is the extensive beer lineup,

featuring over 100 local New Mexican brews. Try the ahi tuna

wonton tacos.

MICHAEL THOMAS COFFEEROASTERS 202 Bryn Mawr Dr SE, 504-7078

FOOD | by Dan Pennington

[Coffee/Tea/Espresso, Bakery/Sweets] Far more

spacious than its Carlisle counterpart, the Nob Hill Michael

Thomas offers plenty of seating and a lovely outdoor patio.

Of course, the café still serves the same delicous coffee, as

well as tasty baked goods.

THE SHOP 2933 Monte Vista Blvd NE, 433-2795 • $$[American, New Mexican, Mexican] It’s in a location that

has seen quite a few restaurants come and go over the

years, but The Shop is making a real go of it. With an

emphasis on high quality, locally sourced foods, the menu

here covers breakfast (try the pancakes and the chilaquiles)

and lunch (we suggest a cubano or chicken and waffles)

with equal finesse and attention to detail.

NORTH VALLEY

SLOW ROASTED BOCADILLOS 1609 Indian School Rd NW, 200-0053[Deli/Sandwiches] Bocadillos doesn’t just offer slow

cooked meats with an amazing flavor and touch—they also

deliver these delicacies right to your doorstep. Make sure to

try the Roadrunner burrito with extra green chile.

NORTHEAST HEIGHTS

AN HY QUAN VEGETARIANRESTAURANT1405 Juan Tabo Blvd NE, 332-8565 • $[Vegan, Vegetarian, Vietnamese] These piquant dishes

will satisfy all with flavor and price. Try the papaya salad:

slivers of papaya in a light chili sauce, topped with fresh

basil and crushed peanuts, this is something that we could

literally eat everyday. An Hy Quan only serves up Vietnamese

vegetarian and vegan dishes.

UNIVERSITY

HUMBLE COFFEE COMPANY

4200 Lomas Blvd NE Ste C, 289-9909 • $

[Coffee/Tea/Espresso] Stop by this neighborhood joint

for excellent espresso-based concoctions and locally-

roasted beans. There are a variety of baked goods on hand

(mostly) from New Mexico Pie Company. Make sure to try

the avocado toast, lavender donuts, local pop-tarts and

coffee with a splash of magically delicious coconut milk.

KABAB HOUSE

301 Cornell Dr SE, 312-8949 • $$

[Middle Eastern] Don’t let the tacky Bud Light signs fool

you (or the fact that the restaurant’s name is spelled three

different ways on them). This cozy little cafe serves up some

great and authentic Persian food. The titular kabobs are as

good as you could hope for—especially the bone-in lamb—

and the staff is friendly and eager to guide you to the best

parts of the menu. Watch out for the salted yogurt drink

doogh, though—Westerners might not be prepared for its

pungency.

O RAMEN AND CURRY HOUSE

2114 Central Ave SE, 508-1897 • $$

[Asian, Japanese] This University area restaurant takes

advantage of whatever natural law it is that makes college

students and ramen noodles a perfect culinary pairing. The

ramen bowls come in three basic broths: chicken, veggie

and the iconic, milky tonkatsu, made from boiled pork

bones. It’s delicious, bolstering stuff and offered at a great

price. Also, check out the Japanese microbrews!

RUDE BOY COOKIES

115 Harvard Dr SE Ste 7, 200-2235 • $

[Bakery/Sweets] Rude Boy Cookies is Albuquerque’s

dessert haven. Try a cookie warmed à la mode or two

cookies with ice cream mashed between for a delicious ice

cream sandwich. You can even customize it with Nutella,

salted caramel, cinammon marshmallow fluff or mini

chocolate chips.

TIA B’S LA WAFFLERÍA

3710 Campus Blvd NE, 492-2007 • $

[Diner] The outdoor seating at Tia B’s is green and cool

and feels more like Austin than Albuquerque. The menu at

the Wafflería is obviously entirely waffle-centric, with a build-

your-own concept that allows diners to choose batter

options (including gluten-free rice, buckwheat and blue corn

flour varieties), fruit or syrup toppings, bacon or sausage to

bake inside and whipped cream if one so desires. There are

also several varieties of savory waffles, including the

majestic smoked salmon plate.

Chowtown ChowdownIt’s another week, and you know what that means! Time to tell you about more places to go order take out from. Keep supporting local is all I can say. a

BALUBFA12

AUGUST 6-12, 2020 WEEKLY ALIBI [17]

BY CLARKE CONDÉ

The Key Lime Caipirinha is a

tropical drink perfect for the dog

days of August in the Northern

Hemisphere. Of Brazilian derivation, it

gets its flavor from the key limes and the

Brazilian spirit Cachaça which is similar to

rum, but made directly from raw

sugarcane instead of molasses. The flavor

is unique, so go through the extra effort to

find it and don’t cheap out thinking you

can get away with just using rum. In fact,

don’t cheap out on any of the ingredients.

Rum is not cachaça, white sugar is not

agave and Persian limes are not Key limes.

Key limes are an unrivaled fruit when it

comes to delivering a tropical taste in a

small package. They are distinguished

from their blander Persian cousins by their

stronger flavor and yellower skin. For this

cocktail it is best to start with a big bag or

two and grab the juicer. It takes a lot of

juice to make the Key Lime Caipirinha,

COCKTAILS | by Clark Condé

but it is worth it for the flavor. Just don’t

plan on making a pitcher of this stuff

unless you like spending all afternoon

juicing limes.

Three parts cachaça

Two parts key lime juice

One part agave nectar

Key lime to garnish

Crushed ice

Once you’ve juiced the limes, get

yourself a cocktail shaker and add the

cachaça and agave. A couple of shakes

later and you are good to go. This cocktail

has a powerful flavor so feel free to adjust

its potency with crushed ice. Usually

served in a rocks glass, the Key Lime

Caipirinha is garnished with a slice of key

lime. Here you can get creative and

substitute for some other glass if you like.

It is just a cocktail after all. a

The Key Lime CaipirinhaA Brazilian cocktail made for August

Serve it in a coupe glass just to be fancy. CLARKE CONDÉ

[18] WEEKLY ALIBI AUGUST 6-12, 2020

NEWS | OPINION by Dan Pennington

Mask It or CasketBelieve you’re exempt from a mask? Think again.

Maskholes. It’s the term that wascoined and defined throughUrbanDictionary.com as,

“assholes who don’t wear masks publiclyduring the coronavirus/COVID-19pandemic.” Sadly, this nearly exclusivelyAmerican problem of mask adoption rateshas been one of the larger contributingfactors to why the outbreak on thehomefront has been so widespread anddrawn out. We lead lives where we begin tonotice patterns. Life is very much aboutthe patterns that surround us. Whatpatterns can we discern from data to figureout what went wrong here to create saidmaskholes.

For reference let’s look toPewResearch.org, which polled 4,708Americans from a wide variety ofbackgrounds, political views, geographicallocations and other factors to find out howthey felt about masks. Let’s pretend wedon’t already know how this is going toplay out. When polled, 86 percent ofDemocrats believed masks should be wornalways or most of the time when out inpublic. Conversely, Republicans onlypolled at 52 percent, with 48 percentsaying they felt they should be worn onlysome of the time to never. Aha!

But let’s be real with each other for aminute. That poll tells us nothing wedidn’t already know. Somewhere along theway, basic science and good practices forkeeping other Americans safe becameconflated into a political issue. This is abigger issue with American identitypolitics, where you’re either A or B, with usor against us, the good guy or the bad guy,Republican or Democrat (or third-partythat is essentially one of those two parties,in a slightly altered direction). Where didRepublicans get the ridiculous idea thatmasks wouldn’t protect them and others?Some could put the blame on Republicanleadership, which has flaunted wearing amask more or less since the very beginningof this pandemic. Which reminds me, restin peace to Herman Cain.

But even that doesn’t actually reach thecore of the issue. Assuming that thecurrent federal administration isn’t just acult of personality, and these people aretruly free thinkers with enoughintelligence to understand that the greatermedical and scientific community trulyknow what they’re talking about, howcome the issue isn’t permeating? They’renot wearing masks, it should have aneasier time doing so now more than ever.Is “getting sick to own the libs” really the

true purpose of this? Not quite. What this comes down to is the

“American Dream,” a phrase that has beentossed around, changed, remixed,restructured and recaptured by bothparties so many times that the actualmeaning has become so lost. Does it meanthe right to live in a safe country? Well,clearly not right now. Does it mean theright to equal opportunities to succeed?Not for most of the country, but we’re suretrying! Does it mean the freedom to justdo whatever you want? Oh yeah, that’s theone people believe now. The AmericanDream is unfettered freedom. Libertarians,please contain your cries of ecstasy. Youwant to fire guns into the air at 3am? Gofor it, they won’t stop you (if you aren’t aBIPOC). Want to throw a rally tellingpeople science is all a lie and lizard peoplecontrol our government? Go for it, youcould get endorsed by the President! Wantto contribute to 157,000 mostly

preventable deaths in the country youclaim to love, because a piece of cloth onyour face would be too much of arestriction to your lifestyle of showingteeth to strangers? Guess what? Apparentlyyou can, and will!

Do I sound bitter? Good, I am. Whenevery major medical group in the worldmakes a recommendation, but a womanwho believes demons can get you pregnantin your sleep says otherwise, yet you sidewith that woman, it makes me and amajority of Americans feel like we’re livingin a mid ’90s comic book. But let’s forgetabout all of this for a moment and tacklethe other big issue here.

Let’s assume you do believe maskswork, but you just don’t like wearing them.You have realized that on a certain level,you can’t fight the law by saying “I choosenot to” and need some other avenue to getaway with exposing your breath to themasses. Is all hope lost for you? Fear not,

intrepid maskhole, there’s a loophole thatexists yet! You might remember when wetalked last week about COVID-19 testingand the way that public versus privatetesting meant some people could go backto work after testing positive if they feltlike it because they legally could useHIPAA and the ADA to avoid sharing theirprivate health information. Aha! Privatehealth information! If you have an ADA-covered disability, you can say a mask isharmful to your health and you’re exemptfrom wearing one. They can’t ask what itis, and you’re scot free. Literally foolproof!

Well, except for one thing. Whenlooking at the most common ADA-covereddisabilities, you’ll notice something.Looking at the Job AccommodationNetwork (JAN) which is a leading source offree, expert and confidential guidance onworkplace accommodations and disabilityemployment issues, you can see theircomprehensive list of ADA-covered

I mean, they do a lot more than that to be fair. CLARKE CONDÉ

AUGUST 6-12, 2020 WEEKLY ALIBI [19]

NEWS | OPINION by Dan Pennington

disabilities and accommodations that needto be made for them. There is a subsectionfor respiratory impairments, which wouldconstitute asthma or chronic obstructivepulmonary disease (COPD), which legallyfit the bill and have been the two mostcommon references to ADA-coveredfreedom of masklessness in public. So,through the ADA, you can ask for thereasonable accommodation to not wear amask because it obstructs your breathing.

There is a small caveat, though. Adouble-edged sword, if you will. See, thereasonable accommodations made by abusiness for you and your safety work bothways. You could say that you can’t walk upstairs because of special legs you had madeafter an accident, and the only thing youcan safely walk up is a slide of ice.Hypothetically. But what about everyoneelse? The slide has become a danger tothem. Legally, the business can say thatyour accommodations cause more harmand deny your request. From the Asthmaand Allergy Foundation of America(AAFA), “The ADA also says if anaccommodation could cause harm to otherpeople, then a business does not need toprovide the accommodation. If a personwith asthma is coughing and not wearing amask, they might be exposing otherpeople to COVID-19. So in this case, theemployer could require the person withasthma to stay home or wear a facemask/covering.” Even more so, mostdoctors agree that it is more dangerous tobe maskless with a respiratory problembecause of how COVID-19 affects your

system and say those with breathing issuesshould be the highest priority for wearinga mask. Damn. So close to getting awaywith it.

Before I’m accused of attacking thosewith disabilities, I’d like to clearly statethat I am a lifelong sufferer of asthma,who is on a number of treatment plans tomanage my symptoms, and while I find mymask uncomfortable, especially aftereating an Italian meal chock full of garlic,I have yet to ever feel like I am suffocatingor unable to breathe in any of the masks Ihave worn in public. You could ask yourdoctor for a medical exemption notice, butyou’d first have to find one willing to doso, and even then a business can still sayyou are putting others at risk by notwearing it and legally deny you entry.

So is there a way to get around wearinga mask in public? The short answer is no.The long answer is the 1258 words thatpreceded the previous statement, which isstill no. I want to believe that everyone inthe world has compassion and commonsense, but it’s becoming very apparentthese past months that unfortunately thatisn’t true. I question the bloodbath thatwould ensue if a bunch of people in whitecoats got on Facebook Live and said thateating the hearts of children is proven tocause immortality. Ten years ago the ideawould seem ludicrous that anyone but themost fringe of people would believe it.Unfortunately, I can’t stop seeing thepatterns, and currently, the number onepattern I keep seeing is new COVID casesgoing up in the US. a

[20] WEEKLY ALIBI AUGUST 6-12 , 2020

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AUGUST 6-12, 2020 WEEKLY ALIBI [21]

Democrat version of the coronavirus reliefbill.

“I don’t agree with you that cannabis isnot related to this. This is a therapy thathas proven successful,” she said to areporter. That’s quite a bold statement,there.

Cannabis Sales SurgeUltra Health recently commissioned ananalysis of the COVID-19 medicalcannabis boom in New Mexico.

According to KRQE the report foundthat medical cannabis patients are oftenpart of at-risk populations and want moremedicine during the pandemic. Theanalysis found increased loneliness,depression, anxiety, fear and concernabout the future were also contributing

factors to the increase in cannabis use.Ultra Health president and CEODuke Rodriguez once again used

the opportunity to call for anincrease to the number ofplants that producers areallowed to grow. “We’re up

250 percent, almost 3 timeswhat we were the same time last

year,” he told reporters. “This is notjust going to be a short term problem,this is going to stay with us. So the goalhas to be two things: that the stateincrease the number of plants … and

number two: We gotta allow patients tobuy what they need.”

NDAA Amendment WouldAllow CBD for VeteransA recently passed amendment to theNational Defense Authorization Act couldallow those in the military to use hempproducts, including CBD.

According to JD Supra, the measure,sponsored by Rep. Tulsi Gabbard, waspassed in the House of Representatives bya vote of 336 to 71. The amendment saysthat the “Secretary of Defense may notprohibit, on the basis of a productcontaining hemp or any ingredientderived from hemp, the possession, use, orconsumption of such product by a memberof the Armed Forces if: 1.) the hemp meetsthe definition in section 297A of theAgricultural Marketing Act of 1946; and2.) such possession, use, or consumption isin compliance with applicable Federal,State, and local law.”

Although the amendment passed in theHouse, it still has to go through the Senatebefore it makes it into the final NDAA. a

BAKED GOODS | CANNABIS NEWS by Joshua Lee

The weight of the cannabis vote isbeing felt on the presidentialcandidates, and the dust is only

starting to get kicked up. Last month theWhite House’s special spiritual advisorweirdly ripped into presidential hopefulJoe Biden for his anti-cannabis history.

In an extremely surreal moment (evenfor 2020), Paula White-Cain, specialadvisor to the Faith and OpportunityInitiative at the White House Office ofPublic Liaison, criticized Biden forpushing more stringent drug laws duringhis tenure as Vice President in the Obamaadministration.

Making these points isn’t weird—I’vebeen talking about this matter for the lastmonth—what’s weird is the fact that shemade them in front of a collection ofright-wing Christian evangelicals. Andthey ate it up.

At an Evangelicals For Trumpevent in Alpharetta, Ga. lastmonth, White-Cain claimed thepress has been mischaracterizingthe president as “law and order.”She said the president is concernedabout recidivism rates and wants to seeprison reform. She pointed out that hesigned the First Step and Second StepActs that reformed federal sentencinglaws and made it easier for those whowere formerly incarcerated to findemployment. She also pointed out thatBiden’s history regarding the subject isterrible by comparison.

“Everyone forgets Clinton’s bill that JoeBiden went along with and signed peopleto prison for 30 years for 3 ounces ofmarijuana,” she said. “Everybody wants toforget that this guy that wants to come in aspresident is just a Trojan horse for a veryradical left agenda that is behind him.”

This is incredibly strange consideringthe anti-pot stance that the radicalChristian Right used to espouse. Many ofyou reading this might not have beenaround during the ’80s, but the very ideaof a right-wing, politically-backed pastoropenly criticizing anti-drug laws wouldhave caused riots back then.

In Reagan’s America every church onevery corner preached about the evils ofrecreational drugs—particularly the“gateway drug” marijuana. To see thatsame crew applauding the exact oppositesentiment is jarring to say the very least.This culture war between the Right andLeft is making for some very strangebedfellows.

But don’t get too excited. It doesn’tmean that “Trump is definitely going tolegalize if he gets re-elected,” as one of myRepublican friends recently said to me. I’dsay the exact opposite, actually. Trumponly has to run this script long enough tomake a few Democrats jump ship beforethe election and short circuit Biden’schances of a victory. After that he can goback to ignoring the whole issue again.

But I bet it does mean that the popularRight is scooting toward the middle, andthat the far-right is quickly eroding. It alsomeans that we’ll probably see more stonedpreachers—which sounds like a good ideato me.

In the meantime, maybe we’ll see Bidenbudge a little on legalization when herealizes that Republicans are taking a moreleft-leaning stance on the matter than heis. Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi isclearly getting the message. She recentlydefended the inclusion of cannabisbanking protections in the proposed

End of DaysEvangelicals oppose drug laws

[22] WEEKLY ALIBI AUGUST 6-12 , 2020

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CROSSWORD | “GETTING FREE K” REACHING #1000 | by Matt Jones

Congratulations to Matt Jones on reaching 1000 puzzles!ANSWERS TO THIS WEEK’S PUZZLE ARE AVAILABLE AT ALIBI.COM

TOON PAGE | by Jen Sorensen

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Across1 They’re out to pasture10Words before “your mother” or “your father”15 Prepared statement16 Slip17 Verdi opera originally titled “La maledizione” (“The Curse”)18 ___ Selänne, highest-scoring Finn in NHLhistory19 Short gamut20Measures of loudness21 Change direction sharply23 Does a dairy duty27 “Them!” creature28 Cry of accomplishment30WWE wrestler ___ Mysterio31 Iconic “Lady and the Tramp” song whose titlemeans “Beautiful Night”33 Elemento numero 7934 CLE player35Middle of a French Revolution motto36 Pharmacy chain with unusually long receipts37 Card seen in skat38 Risky purchase40 Places for Whoppers, briefly41 Frigid ocean areas that can be seasonal orpermanent42 Site for mil. planes43 Record producer Mike ___, or actress ___ Kaye44 Go with the flow, maybe?48Minimal50 Hull backbone51 Rod Stewart’s “Lost ___”52 Extended57Make grime pay?58Moved forward, perhaps59 River through France and Belgium60 Vacation purchase with a possibly aggressivesales pitch

Down1 Harness part2 Nation where kreyòl ayisyen is spoken3 Bush or Clinton, informally4 Game for NFL all-stars5 Daughter of Loki6 One of the saisons7 Dirty groove?8 “The 5,000 Fingers of ___” (1953 Dr. Seuss film)9 ___-Caps (movie candy brand)10 Increases in difficulty, like a hike11 Vowel-rich cookie12 Category for Styx and (arguably) the Stones13 “Wow, that was rude!”14 Cereal on “The Simpsons” where Bart ingestedsome jagged metal22 Small-screen movie, quaintly23 One in charge24 Admire excessively25 Told, as a secret26 ___ Bachika (“Gurren Lagann” anime characterwho I just found out is a human and not a cat)29 ___ De Spell (“DuckTales” character voiced byCatherine Tate in the 2017 reboot)31 Place for neighborly gossip32 Samuel L. Jackson movie that Roger Ebertcalled the best film of 199734 Adherence to mystic doctrines39Wisconsin city known for kids' overalls45 Yiddish gossip46 “I gotta go feed the ___”47 Hitch in haste49 ___-chef52 1-800-CALL-___ (bygone collect call service)53 “What ___ know?”54 DeLuise in many outtakes with Burt Reynolds55 Get by, with “out”56 ___ EFX (“Mic Checka” hip-hop group)

[24] WEEKLY ALIBI AUGUST 6-12, 2020