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The Walker Rutledge

Guidebook

to

Good Grammar

and

Composition

(Condensed Version)

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Table of Contents

Chapter One: The Modern Language Association Essay Format Chapter Two: Compositional Errors 1. The Problem with the Five-Paragraph Theme 2. Weak Opening Paragraphs 3. Weak Final Paragraphs 4. Person: First or Third? Chapter Three: Grammatical Errors

1. Sentence Fragment 2. Run-on or Fused Sentence 3. Comma Splice 4. Semicolon Error 5. Lack of Subject-Verb Agreement 6. Various Comma Errors a. Need comma after an introductory adverbial clause b. Need comma before a coordinate conjunctions that precedes another independent clause c. Do not need comma before a coordinate conjunction if it neither precedes another independent clause nor connects a series of items d. Need comma after a year if the month and day are also provided e. Need comma after the name of a state if the name of the town is also provided 7. Wrong Case

8. Shifts

a. Shift in Number

b. Shift in Person

c. Shift in Tense d. Shift in Mood

e. Shift in Level of Discourse9. Misplaced Modifier

10. Dangling Constructions

a. Dangling Participle

b. Dangling Gerund

c. Dangling Infinitive 11. Faulty Pronoun Reference

12. Confusion of Restrictive/Non-Restrictive Items

13. Mixed Construction

14. Faulty Correlation (Faulty Logic)

15. Faulty Parallelism

Chapter Four: Quotation Procedures Chapter Five: Weak and Strong Essays

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Chapter One

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The Modern Language Association Essay Format (as adapted from the Purdue University Online Writing Lab website)

Summary:

MLA (Modern Language Association) style is most commonly used to write papers and cite sources within the liberal arts and humanities. This resource, updated to reflect the MLA Handbook for Writers of Research Papers (7th ed.) and the MLA Style Manual and Guide to Scholarly Publishing (3rd ed.), offers examples for the general format of MLA research papers, in-text citations, endnotes/footnotes, and the Works Cited page.

Contributors:Tony Russell, Allen Brizee, Elizabeth Angeli, Russell Keck, Joshua M. Paiz, Michelle Campbell, Rodrigo Rodríguez-Fuentes, Daniel P. Kenzie, Purdue OWL Staff

Last Edited: 2014-10-10 09:09:47

You can also watch an MLA vidcast series on the Purdue OWL YouTube Channel.

General Format

MLA style specifies guidelines for formatting manuscripts and using the English language in writing. MLA style also provides writers with a system for referencing their sources through parenthetical citation in their essays and Works Cited pages.

Writers who properly use MLA also build their credibility by demonstrating accountability to their source material. Most importantly, the use of MLA style can protect writers from accusations of plagiarism, which is the purposeful or accidental uncredited use of source material by other writers.

If you are asked to use MLA format, be sure to consult the MLA Handbook for Writers of Research Papers (7th edition). Publishing scholars and graduate students should also consult the MLA Style Manual and Guide to Scholarly Publishing (3rd edition). The MLA Handbook is available in most writing centers and reference libraries; it is also widely available in bookstores, libraries, and at the MLA web site. See the Additional Resources section of this handout for a list of helpful books and sites about using MLA style.

Paper Format

1. Type your paper on a computer and print it out on standard, white 8.5 x 11-inch

paper.

2. Double-space the text of your paper, and use a legible font (e.g. Bookman Old Style or Times New Roman). MLA recommends that the regular and italics type styles contrast enough so that they are recognizable from each other. The font size should be 11 or 12 pt.

3. Leave only one space after periods or other punctuation marks.

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4. Set the margin of your document to one inch on all sides.

5. Indent the first line of paragraphs one-half inch from the left margin. MLA recommends that you use the Tab key as opposed to pushing the Space Bar five times.

6. Create a header that numbers all pages consecutively in the upper right-hand corner, one-half inch from the top and flush with the right margin. You may omit the number on your first page.

7. Use italics throughout your essay for the titles of longer works and, only when absolutely necessary, for providing emphasis.

8. If you have any endnotes, include them on a separate page before your Works-Cited page. Entitle the section Notes (centered, unformatted).

Formatting the First Page of Your Paper

1. Do not make a title page for your paper unless specifically requested. For my classes, NO separate title page should be provided.

2. In the upper left-hand corner of the first page, list your name, your instructor's name, the course, and the date. Again, be sure to use double-spaced text.

3. Double space again and center the title. Do not underline, italicize, or place your title in quotation marks; write the title in Title Case (standard capitalization), not in all capital letters.

3. Use quotation marks and/or italics when referring to other works in your title, just as you would in your text: Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas as Morality Play; Human Weariness in "After Apple Picking."

4. Double space between the title and the first line of the text.

Create a header in the upper right-hand corner that includes your last name, followed by a space with a page number; number all pages consecutively with Arabic numerals (1, 2, 3, 4, etc.), one-half inch from the top and flush with the right margin. (Note: You do not need to number your first page. Do as you wish.)

Here is a sample of the first page of a paper in MLA style:

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Chapter Two

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Compositional Errors

1. The Problem with the Five-Paragraph Theme Alas, the five-paragraph theme is still taught in high-school and (doubly alas) is frequently taught in college. Hence, a formula emerges: paragraph #1 = introduction; paragraphs #2, #3, and #4 = body; and paragraph # 5 = conclusion. A miniature version of this is unfortunately even recommended for individual paragraphs, with sentence #1 being the introductory sentence; #2, #3, and #4 offering support; and #5 saying everything all over again.

So, what is wrong with the five-paragraph theme? Well, first of all, nobody in the real world writes this way! I have an office full of books containing essays by professional writers, and not a single one follows this formula. And, of course, that is the problem: writing is an art form, not a formula! Only high-school students and poorly-informed college students write this way! Before you were ruined by your English teachers, common sense taught you that long papers-- say, fifty pages in length-- would likely have long introductions and long conclusions, sometimes stretching over many paragraphs and many pages. Duh! And short essays-- say, three or four pages in length--would likely have short introductions and short conclusions—maybe only a sentence of two in length. Yes, papers have to begin and end, but the introduction and conclusion do not need to be separate paragraphs. They can be part of the body itself. And there is no rule that the body must present three ideas. You may have only one idea or a zillion that you want to develop. Okay, everyone, myself included, has had to write a five-paragraph theme. Here is a silly example: Abortion in America In this modern, fast-moving, highly technological world in which we live today, abortion remains a controversial issue. [ Teacher wants me to have a nice, plump paragraph, and I have successfully padded it with 18 words.] It is controversial for three reasons. First, there is the medical reason. Second, there is the legal reason. And third, there is the social reason. Each of these will be discussed in the following

paragraphs. First, there is the medical reason why abortion remains a controversial issue. [This paragraph drones on to the point of nausea.] Next (or “second,” or “secondly”--if you have been listening to too many sermon outlines), there is the legal reason. (More droning follows.)

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Finally (or “third”), there is the social reason why abortion remains a controversial issue. (blah, blah, blah) In conclusion, (another clever word choice!) as we readily see, there are three reasons why abortion remains a controversial issue. First, there is the medical reason. Second, there is the legal reason, and third, there is the social reason. (Note that everything has been needlessly repeated. If the reader cannot remember what has already been said in this short paper, he or she has been asleep…or dead! Now for the kicker! Teacher wants me to have a snappy, instructional ending. Here goes.) Therefore, always practice safe sex! Yikes! What a terrible essay! Actually, it’s not an essay at all. It’s a list! A better opening paragraph would have covered the introduction in one sentence and then proceeded directly to the first point…still in the same paragraph. Try this: For medical, legal, and social reasons, abortion remains a controversial issue in America. Medical professionals, for example, remain divided about (and the paragraph continues to discuss the responses of the health-care community). The conclusion could have been artfully established in the last body paragraph. No tacked-on summary and restatement would have been necessary. Try this: Because of the medical and legal issues surrounding abortion, social responses continue to remain controversial. (blah, blah, blah). Here the reader is reminded of the medical and legal issues, but the writer then finishes by discussing the social responses. Everything is tied up, and the reader’s memory has not been insulted with the addition of a final, redundant paragraph. This paper had four paragraphs. Could it have had five or twenty-five? Sure. Any one of the topics could have been developed into several paragraphs. The legal issues, for example, could have been sub-divided into national laws and state laws. The main point is that the writing should be efficient, fluid, and meaningful, not needlessly repetitive or formulaic. You are asking your reader to give you something very valuable: his or her time! Don’t’ waste it! Can you have a five-paragraph theme? Sure, if the paragraphs are all meaningful and avoid needless repetition. Just don’t have a disguised list. Can the introduction be a separate paragraph? Sure, if the material requires

a separate paragraph. But in very short papers (three to five pages in length) this is often not necessary. Caveat: Sadly but truly you will find undergraduate and graduate instructors in various university departments who want your writing to be formulaic. Why? Because it makes it faster to read, especially if the instructor cares nothing about language, style, or nuance and is in a hurry to get the papers marked. He or she is only wanting to see if you have some ideas and if they are supported. After all, the five-paragraph theme with its three major points does, indeed, indicate that the student

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had some kind of organizing principle in mind. Why that instructor didn’t simply ask for a list, I’ll never know. What I want you to understand, however, is that this is still lousy writing. You are welcome to refer such instructors to me, if you wish. 2. Weak Opening Paragraphs If you have followed the previous section, you understand that writing is an art form, not a formula. Your topic does have to be introduced, but that introduction may only be a sentence or part of a sentence. Then you just get on with your paper, all in that same first paragraph. Also note that you don’t have to mention all of your major points in the first paragraph. Create some suspense in order to keep your reader interested. The example in section 1 could have avoided mentioning the legal and social issues surrounding abortion until addressing them in separate paragraphs. Here are some introductions to avoid: a. Avoid the “since the beginning of time” introduction: Faulty: Throughout the ages of mankind, there have been countless attempts at explaining the nature of love. b. Avoid the rambling introduction: Faulty: Emily Brontë shows the reader how powerful love is. She teaches the reader that love is the most powerful emotion that humans possess; Wuthering Heights is a testament of how love in any form can create anything form utter chaos to peace and healing. c. Avoid needless announcements of what you plan to do. Just do it! The

reader already knows that this is your paper: Faulty: This analysis will look at point-of-view strategies that Emily Brontë implemented in Wuthering Heights. Faulty: Now, I’ll explain to you the elements that make this story so appealing. d. Avoid beginning with gimmicky, irrelevant, cute quotations that you have borrowed from Bartlett’s Book of Familiar Quotations or other such sources.

3. Weak Concluding Paragraphs In short essays--three to five pages in length--avoid including a tacked-on, summary-and-restatement paragraph. The one below simply repeats and repeats and repeats what was already established in the essay: Emily Brontë creates two worlds perfectly balanced in her novel Wuthering Heights. The worlds of Wuthering Heights and Thrushcross Grange are as connected and as different as two sides of the same coin: they are impossible to unite because of

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their differences and yet they are so equally matched neither can gain the upper hand. These two houses create worlds quite different from each other and yet each has its own stake in the characters of Wuthering Heights. 4. Person: First or Third? If a writer is talking about her first piano less, obviously the use of first-person narrative is appropriate. Or if one has made a personal discovery during a laboratory experiment, the use of first-person narrative would be expected. However, in an analysis paper, a cool, objective tone is preferred. After all, the reader already knows who the writer is. The use of such expressions as “I think” or “I believe” adds nothing to the depth of the paper. Examples, evidence, support—these are the qualities that lend weight to an argument.

a. Faulty: I guarantee that next Sunday Miss Brill went out and she flaunted her fur. (Where is the evidence that she will flaunt her fur next Sunday?) b. Faulty: The information I gather about the Emancipation Proclamation did not free

not one single slave. (What information?)

c. Faulty: I believe the answer to that question is blatantly clear. (Oh? What you find

clear may not be clear to anyone else?)

d. Faulty: I don’t believe that the secretary of state had sympathy for slaves. (Evidence?

Support for this claim?)

e. Faulty: I believe that Abraham Lincoln really had good intentions when he wrote the Emancipation Proclamation. (How do you define good intentions? What led you to

this conclusion?)

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Chapter Three

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Grammatical Errors

1. Sentence Fragment

A sentence fragment results from not having a complete independent clause. Even good students sometimes write fragments, typically by treating a subordinate clause as if it were an independent clause. Words like although or while can be misleading; they are subordinate conjunctions, which means that they introduce subordinate clauses, not independent clauses. A student might write the following: Bill was invited to the ambassador’s party. Although he couldn’t afford to rent a tuxedo. The first construction is a sentence. The second one is not. And it is not corrected by placing a comma after although and pretending that it is a conjunctive adverb (like however).

Fiction writers often have intentional fragments as they endeavor to capture the realism of a given speech or situation. Serious essayists, however, adopt a more formal style. Here are some more examples of fragments: a. Faulty: Miss Brill going out once a week, every Sunday. b. Faulty: Although, Isabella soon learned to hate the villain. c. Faulty: And while in the moment Mole and Rat reference him with words of familiarity, such as his titles and Rat going so far as to say when they first entered the island where they found him, “Here, in this holy place, here if anywhere, we shall find Him!”(90). d. Faulty: A life of smaller fortune and schmoozing off of better-situated acquaintances for Sir Walter, and a life of loneliness for Miss Elizabeth Elliot, due to her finding fault in every potential spouse. e. Faulty: They wanted to construct a more common society. A society that was possibly more equal and had fewer resemblances to the higher class. (The first construction is a sentence. The second one is merely an appositive.) f. Faulty: Whereas, countryside living is the opposite.

2. Run-on Sentence A run-on sentence occurs when two or more independent clauses are run together without any separating punctuation or coordinate conjunction. It may be corrected by inserting a period and starting a new sentence, using a semicolon, or adding a comma and a coordinate conjunction.

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Incidentally, the coordinate conjunctions are and, but, or, nor, for, yet, and sometimes so. Do not confuse these words with such conjunctive adverbs as however, nevertheless, consequently, thus, hence, and therefore. A run-on sentence cannot be corrected by using a comma and a conjunctive adverb. An actual coordinate conjunction is required. a. Faulty: Paul’s death was not entirely the fault of Uncle Oscar however he could have stopped the betting. b. Correct: Paul’s death was not entirely the fault of Uncle Oscar. However, he could have stopped the betting. c. Correct: Paul’s death was not entirely the fault of Uncle Oscar; however, he could have stopped the betting.

d. Correct: Paul’s death was not entirely the fault of Uncle Oscar, but he could have stopped the betting. 3. Comma Splice A comma splice is the use of only a comma to separate two or more independent clauses. In effect, it is a run-on sentence that only has a comma separating the independent clauses. It is corrected in precisely the same three ways that a run-on sentence is corrected. a. Faulty: The Earnshaws and Heathcliff gave the Heights its dark and miserable atmosphere, however the Lintons made Thrushcross Grange into a place where civilization could flourish. b. Correct: The Earnshaws and Heathcliff gave the Heights its dark and miserable atmosphere. However, the Lintons made Thrushcross Grange into a place where civilization could flourish. c Correct: The Earnshaws and Heathcliff gave the Heights its dark and miserable atmosphere; however, the Lintons made Thrushcross Grange into a place where civilization could flourish. d. Correct: The Earnshaws and Heathcliff gave the Heights its dark and miserable atmosphere, but the Lintons made Thrushcross Grange into a place where civilization could flourish.

4. Semicolon Error A semicolon error is the opposite of a comma splice. Here, a semicolon is used to separate two constructions which are not both independent clauses. The usual correction is to replace the semicolon with a comma.

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a. Faulty: Whether Lockwood is used to introduce the setting, to provide an audience for Nelly’s exposition, or to skip ahead to the story’s resolution; he aptly serves his purpose as Emily Brontë’s literary multi-tool. b. Correct: Whether Lockwood is used to introduce the setting, to provide an audience for Nelly’s exposition, or to skip ahead to the story’s resolution, he aptly serves his purpose as Emily Brontë’s literary multi-tool. c. Faulty: One interpretation repeatedly pops up; the Freudian reading. d. Correct: One interpretation repeatedly pops up, the Freudian reading. e. Correct: One interpretation repeatedly pops up—the Freudian reading. (A dash, instead of a comma, may be used with a final appositive.) Note: You might well ask why sentence fragments, run-on sentences, comma splices, and semicolon errors are regarded as serious mistakes. The answer is that such errors call into question whether the writer truly knows what an independent clause is—which is another way of asking if the writer truly knows what a sentence is, for an independent clause is a simple sentence. And the sentence is our basic unit for written communication. 5. Lack of Subject-Verb Agreement Subjects and verbs agree in number. That is, a singular subject requires a singular verb; a plural subject requires a plural verb. The key here is often simply a matter of recognizing what the subject is. a. Faulty: The romantic motif of complete opposites initially battling each other have been present in numerous stories. Correct: The romantic motif of complete opposites initially battling each other has been present in numerous stories. b. Faulty: The cheerful color of the trees, grass, and distant mountains add to the freshness of the painting. (The subject is color, not trees, grass, and distant mountains.) Correct: The cheerful color of the trees, grass, and distant mountains adds

to the freshness of the painting. 6. Various Comma Errors a. Need comma after an introductory adverbial clause. A comma is always needed after an introductory adverbial clause. These are the clauses that often begin with when, if, since, because, when, while and other subordinate conjunctions.

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1. Faulty: When Anne encounters the new scenery of Lyme the narrator uses imagery to portray Anne’s feeling of awe. Correct: When Anne encounters the new scenery of Lyme, the narrator uses imagery to portray Anne’s feeling of awe. 2. Faulty: Although Anne has this feeling of emptiness she is still the kindest and most helpful individual in her household. Correct: Although Anne has this feeling of emptiness, she is still the kindest and most helpful individual in her household. Note: While commas are always needed after introductory adverbial clauses, they are rarely needed if such clauses come at the end of a sentence. Why? Because the normal order of the English sentence is main clause followed by subordinate clause, not subordinate clause followed by main clause. 1. Correct: When I went to bed, I could not sleep. Here the sentence begins with the adverbial subordinate clause. The comma is necessary. 2. Correct: I could not sleep when I went to bed. Here the adverbial subordinate clause follows the main clause. Hence, no comma should be included. b. Need comma before a coordinate conjunction that precedes another independent clause Unless the sentence is very short (“He laughed and then he cried.”), a comma is needed before a coordinate conjunction (such words as and, but, or) that precedes another independent clause. It basically signals that another independent clause is about to follow. 1. Faulty: In Mansfield’s story, the only time the fox fur comes out of its case is on Sundays and this is the same day on which Miss Brill goes to the park. Correct: In Mansfield’s story, the only time the fox fur comes out of its case is on Sundays, and this is the same day on which Miss Brill goes to the park. 2. Faulty: As a young man, Graham Greene joined the Communist Party and

shortly thereafter he received a free trip to Russia. Correct: As a young man, Graham Greene joined the Communist Party, and shortly thereafter he received a free trip to Russia. c. Do not need a comma before a coordinate conjunctions if it neither precedes another independent clause nor connects a series of items

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If the sentence simply has compound verbs, objects of prepositions, or other such constructions, do not place a comma before the coordinate conjunction. 1. Faulty: These two houses make up the setting of Brontë’s novel, and represent their own contrasting characteristics. Correct: These two houses make up the setting of Brontë’s novel and represent their own contrasting characteristics. 2. Faulty: False clues can amplify the suspense factor, and add to the dramatic effect of the calamity at hand. Correct: False clues can amplify the suspense factor and add to the dramatic effect of the calamity at hand. d. Need comma after a year if the month and day are provided 1. Faulty: James Joyce was born February 2, 1882 in Rathgar, Ireland. Correct: James Joyce was born February 2, 1882, in Rathgar, Ireland. Note: If only the month or year is mentioned, no comma is used. 2. Correct: James Joyce was born in 1882 in Rathgar, Ireland. e. Need comma after the name of a state if the name of the town is also provided

1. Faulty: The Corvette museum in Bowling Green, Kentucky sponsors a car festival each summer. Correct: The Corvette museum in Bowling Green, Kentucky sponsors a car festival each summer. Note: If only the city or state is mentioned, no comma is used. 2. Correct: The Corvette museum in Bowling Green sponsors a car festival each summer. 7. Wrong Case

The three cases in the English language are nominative, objective, and possessive. Other languages have such cases as genitive, vocative, locative, and accusative. But we only have three. Subjects and predicate nominatives are in the nominative case; all objects (direct objects, indirect objects, and objects of the preposition) are in the objective case; and items showing ownership are in the possessive case. a. Faulty: She sent invitations to Tom and I.

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Correct: She sent invitations to Tom and me. The objective case me is needed because it is an object of the preposition to. Note: The possessive case is needed with gerunds (which are words derived from verb forms and that now function as nouns and always end in ing). b. Faulty: Bill driving recklessly caused the accident. Correct: Bill’s driving recklessly caused the accident. c. Faulty: He objected to me buying the painting. Correct: He objected to my buying the painting.

d. Faulty: One such instance of Anne failing as a narrator occurs when she feels “a great inclination to go to the outer door” (172). Correct: One such instance of Anne’s failing as a narrator occurs when she feels “a great inclination to go to the outer door” (172). e. Faulty: These are just examples of him trying to make the nurse uncomfortable and spiteful. Correct: These are just examples of his trying to make the nurse uncomfortable and spiteful. 8. Shifts a. Shift in Number Number refers to singular and plural. The goal here is to be consistent in your choice of number. Controversy surrounds the use of they and their as number-neutral words. Certainly, informal speech will include such expressions as “The student forgot to bring their book to class.” Formal speech and writing, however, would argue for “The student forgot to bring her book to class” or “The student forgot to bring his book to class.”

An exception generally prevails with the one words and body words (no one, anyone, everyone, someone, nobody, anybody, everybody, somebody). These words are singular, which means that they are followed by singular verbs. No one would say, “Everybody are sick.” And yet, in a longer sentence the student might write, “Everybody is sick; they came down with the flu,” instead of “Everybody is sick; he came down with the flu.” Because the one words and body words suggest plurality, even though they are followed by singular verbs, the use of they and their afterwards is becoming more and more acceptable.

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The avoid the gender issue of writing he or she, or his or her, it is often useful to use plural terms throughout.

1. Faulty: While each character has their own unique personalities, Heathcliff’s is by far the least respectable.

Correct: While each character has his or her own unique personality, Heathcliff’s is by far the least respectable.

Correct: While the characters have their own unique personalities, Heathcliff’s is by far the least respectable.

2. Faulty: Each student met their advisor prior to registration.

Correct: Each student met his or her advisor prior to registration.

Correct: The students met their advisors prior to registration.

Acceptable: Everybody met their advisors prior to registration.

b. Shift in Person

The English language has three persons: first, second, and third.

Pronouns may be in any of the three persons, while nouns are always in the third person. Which pronoun or noun to select depends upon the grammatical case.

Nominative Case Objective Case Possessive Case

Singular Plural Singular Plural Singular Plural

1st Person I we me us my, mine our, ours

2nd Person you you you you your, yours your, yours

3rd Person he,she they him, her, it them his, her, hers their

it, one, one words, its,

body words

Nouns, of course, use the same spelling for the nominative and objective cases, and apostrophes are used for the possessive case.

A shift in person occurs in the following examples:

1. Faulty: After one plays tennis, you should take a shower. (shift from 3rd person to 2nd).

Correct: After one plays tennis, she should take a shower. (consistent 3rd person)

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Correct: After an individual plays tennis, he or she should take a shower. (consistent 3rd person)

Correct: After you play tennis, you should take a shower. (consistent 2nd person)

2. Faulty: When a student prepares a schedule, you should allow time for lunch. (shift from 3rd person to 2nd).

Correct: When a student prepares a schedule, he or she should allow time for lunch.

Correct: When students prepare their schedules, they should allow time for lunch.

c. Shift in Tense

Present tense (“I live in Bowling Green”) and present perfect tense (“I have lived in Bowling Green for

several years”) can be used together, as can past tense (“I lived in Oklahoma”) and past perfect tense (“I had lived in Oklahoma for five years”). Likewise, if something is happening in the present, present tense should be employed, and if something happened in the past, the past tense if needed. A problem results, however, when the same time period is sometimes treated in the present and at other times in the past.

Once again, consistency is the goal here.

1. Faulty: In The Wind in the Willows, Mole chooses to go on an adventure. This decision was very crucial, as it led him into a different lifestyle.

Correct: In The Wind in the Willows, Mole chooses to go on an adventure. This decision is very crucial, as if leads him into a different lifestyle.

2. Faulty: After becoming accustomed to Heathcliff, Catherine began to respect him. Their subtle fondness for each other surges into a deeply romantic love.

Correct: After becoming accustomed to Heathcliff, Catherine began to respect him. Their subtle fondness for each other surged into a deeply romantic love.

Note: Apart from present tense, past tense, and future tense, there is also the “historical present,” which can often be very useful. For example, “In 1600, William Shakespeare writes his play Hamlet, a play in which he even gives directions on the craft of acting itself.

d. Shift in Mood

The three moods in the English language are indicative (for making statements and asking questions), imperative (for making commands or issuing requests), and subjunctive (for non-factual material). And error occurs if the writer needless shifts from one mood to another, as from the indicative to the imperative. For example:

Faulty: The chef should gather all of his ingredients and place them within easy reach on the counter. But don’t forget to pre-heat the oven. (Here there is not only a shift from the indicative mood to the imperative but also a shift in person from the third-person chef

to the understood second-person X or you.)

Correct: The chef should gather all of his ingredients and place them within easy reach on the counter. But he should not forget to pre-heat the oven. (Now everything is in the indicative mood.)

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Correct: Gather all of your ingredients and place them within easy reach on the counter. But don’t forget to pre-heat the oven. (Now everything is in the imperative mood.)

e. Shift in Level of Discourse Questions may be asked (“Did the man accept the job offer?”) or stated (“I asked if the man accepted the job offer.”) An error in discourse occurs when the two are combined in the same construction. For example: Faulty: I asked did the man accept the job offer. Correct: I asked if the man accepted the job offer.

Correct: I asked, “Did the man accept the job offer?” Young children who are just learning the language will often pose questions in the form of statements, not grasping that with questions the verbs come before the subjects. With statements, the subjects typically come before the verbs. For example, a child might ask, “We are going to the movie?” instead of “Are we going to the movie.” The shift-in-the-level-of-discourse error that adults make is simply an extension of the error that children sometimes make. 9. Misplaced Modifier The only modifiers in the English language are adjectives and adverbs. What complicates this, however, is that these modifiers may be single words, phrases, or subordinate clauses. Such errors may be corrected by simply moving the modifier to a different location in the sentence, physically beside the word which it is modifying. a. Misplaced word Perhaps faulty, depending upon one’s intended meaning: He nearly read half the book. (He almost got around to reading half of the book. The adverb nearly modifies the verb read.) Perhaps faulty, depending upon one’s intended meaning: He read nearly half the book. (Nearly is now an adjective and modifies the noun half, indicating how much of the book he actually read.) b. Misplaced phrase Faulty: He admired the girl walking her dog in a pretty dress. Correct: He admired the girl in a pretty dress walking her dog. c. Misplaced subordinate clause Faulty: She bought a Great Dane for her husband that was housebroken.

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Correct: She bought her husband a Great Dane that was housebroken. Faulty: He took his car to the mechanic that was a lemon. Correct: He took the mechanic his car that was a lemon. Correct: He took his car that was a lemon to the mechanic. 10. Dangling Modifiers Dangling modifiers cannot be corrected by simply moving them to a different location in the sentence. They are dangling because they have nothing logical to modify in the sentence. They may be corrected by giving them something logical to modify or by changing the dangling modifier to a subordinate clause. Dangling modifiers are sometimes called dangling verbals—i.e., dangling participles, dangling gerunds, or dangling infinitives. A verbal is a word that looks like a verb, smells like a verb, and tastes like a verb. But it is no longer a verb! Participles may function as adjectives or adverbs; gerunds function as nouns; and infinitives may serve as adjectives, adverbs, or nouns. a. Dangling participle As indicated above, a participle is a word derived from a verb form that now functions as an adjective or adverb. It may end in ing, ed, or any of the irregular verb endings such as t or en. 1. Faulty: Approaching the hill, the city lights were seen. (Who was approaching?) Correct: Approaching the hill, I saw the city lights. (Here the participle can logically modify I. ) Correct: As I approached the hill, the city lights were seen. (Now the participle has been converted into a subordinate clause used as an adverb.) 2. Faulty: Writing in the English Romantic Period, Brontë’s depictions of love differed markedly from those of the courtly-love tradition. (The depictions were not writing.)

Correct: Writing in the English Romantic Period, Brontë depicted love in a way that was markedly different from that of the courtly-love tradition. Correct: Because she was writing in the English Romantic Period, Brontë depicted love in a way that was markedly different from that of the courtly-love tradition.

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b. Dangling gerund

A gerund is a verbal that always ends in ing and always functions as a noun, which means that it can be a subject, predicate nominative, direct object, indirect object, or object of a preposition. If a gerund dangles, the error always occurs when the gerund is used as the object of a preposition. Note: the gerund could be used correctly as the object of a preposition. It’s just that if the error does appear, it occurs with the gerund as the object of a preposition. 1. Faulty: After reading The Taming of the Shrew, it is obvious that Kate’s husband is not just a tyrant; he is sick. (It did not do the reading.) Correct: After reading The Taming of the Shrew, one can readily conclude that Kate’s husband is not just a tyrant; he is sick. (Keep the gerund, but

provide a logical subject to the sentence.) Correct: After one reads The Taming of the Shrew, it is obvious that Kate’s husband is not just a tyrant; he is sick. (Change the phrase into a subordinate clause.) 2. Faulty: Before eating, the table was set. (The table did not eat.) Correct: Before eating, we set the table. Correct: Before we ate, the table was set. c. Dangling Infinitive Infinitives are verbals that may function as adjectives, adverbs, or nouns. They typically begin with to plus the basic verb form. 1. Faulty: To avoid the typical “fairytale ending,” Paul dies in “The Rocking- Horse Winner.” (Paul did not write the story.) Correct: To avoid the typical “fairytale ending,” D.H. Lawrence has Paul die in “The Rocking-Horse Winner.” 2. Faulty: To make good grades, study is necessary. (Study is not trying to make a grade.) Correct: To make good grades, one must study. 11. Faulty Pronoun Reference Pronouns refer to nouns. A typical pronoun-reference error involves the mention of two individuals, say, Bill and Harry, and then later in the sentence or paragraph referring to he. Does he refer to Bill or Harry?

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1. Faulty: Mary told Alice that she was sick. (Is Mary sick, or is she saying that Alice is sick?) Correct: Mary said, “Alice, I am sick.” Remember that which is also a pronoun, and it must have a logical noun to which it can refer. For example: 2. Faulty: I did not go to the party, which upset my roommate. (Did the party upset my roommate, or did my not going upset her?) Correct: My not going to the party upset my roommate. 12. Confusion of Restrictive/ Non-Restrictive Items

Restrictive refers to information, not punctuation. If information is restrictive, it is essential. Hence, there are no commas. Non-restrictive also refers to information, not punctuation. If information is non-restrictive, it is non-essential. Hence, it is set off with commas. All appositives are either restrictive or non-restrictive. And all subordinate clauses used as adjectives are either restrictive or non-restrictive. In the example “My brother Bill is a scholar,” I have more than one brother. The word Bill is restrictive; it’s essential to the sentence. I’m restricting the information from all of the various brothers to the one brother named Bill. Since the information is restrictive, I use no commas. On the other hand, if I say, “My brother, Bill, is a scholar,” I have only one brother. The word Bill is non-restrictive; it is non-essential to the meaning of the sentence. The reader may not know my brother’s name, but knowing the name is not necessary in order to understand the sentence. Since the information is non-restrictive, it is set off with commas. 1. Faulty: In his novel, As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner recounts the journey of the Bundren family to bury Addie. (Since Faulkner wrote many novels, I have to know what this specific one is. Hence, there is no comma after novel.) Correct: In his novel As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner recounts the journey of the Bundren family to bury Addie. (The comma after Dying has nothing to do with

the restrictive/ non-restrictive issue. It is merely setting off a long introductory prepositional phrase.) 2. Faulty: At the end of “The Rocking-Horse Winner,” Paul correctly names the first- place winner Malabar. (There is only one first-place winner. Hence, the name Malabar is unnecessary.) Correct: At the end of “The Rocking-Horse Winner,” Paul correctly names the first- place winner, Malabar.

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3. Faulty: In As I Lay Dying, Anse’s wife, Addie, is the one who dies. (Actually, Anse remarries at the end of the book. The designation of the specific wife is therefore necessary. The information is “restricted” to her.” Correct: In As I Lay Dying, Anse’s wife Addie is the one who dies. 13. Mixed Construction

A mixed construction occurs when a sentence starts in one grammatical direction and then switches to another. Often a new independent clause is started before the previous one has been completed. This differs from a run-on sentence in that the latter actually does have two or more fully complete independent clauses; they have

simply been run together with no separating punctuation. One way to correct the mixed construction is to change one of the would-be independent clauses into a subordinate clause. 1. Faulty: Katherine Mansfield wrote “Miss Brill” is about an elderly woman who dramatizes her life. Correct: Katherine Mansfield wrote “Miss Brill,” a short story which is about an elderly woman who dramatizes her life. 2. Faulty: Students sometimes introduce new information into their conclusions should not contain unsupported material. Correct: Students sometimes introduce new information into their conclusions, but an essay should not end with unsupported material. Correct: Students should not introduce new, unsupported information into their conclusions. 14. Faulty Correlation (Faulty Logic) Faulty correlation is a specific kind of mixed construction. It involves the relationship between a subject and a predicate nominative. It may be corrected by a) keeping the state-of-being verb and providing a logical predicate nominative or b) changing the state-of-being verb into an action verb, thereby having no predicate nominative at all. 1. Faulty: His career choice is lawyer. (A lawyer is a person, not a career

choice.) Correct: His career choice is law. 2. Faulty: A touchdown is when a football is carried across a goal line. (A touchdown is not a “when.”) Correct: A touchdown is an achievement which is made when a football is carried across a goal line. (Here a logical predicate nominative, achievement, is provided.

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Correct: A touchdown is achieved when a football is carried across a goal line. (Now the predicate nominative has been eliminated by changing the verb into an action verb instead of a state-of-being verb.) 3. Faulty: A comma splice is where only a comma is used between two independent clauses. (A comma splice is not a where or when.) Correct: A comma splice is an error in which only a comma is used between two independent clauses. (A logical predicate nominative, error, is provided.) Correct: A comma splice occurs when only a comma is used between two independent clauses. (By changing the verb, we have eliminated the

predicate nominative. Now the when clause is a subordinate clause used as an adverb.) 15. Faulty Parallelism For clarity of thought, whenever a sentence contains two or more subjects, verbs, direct objects, or other sentence parts, those parts should be in the same grammatical form. 1. Faulty: Swimming, boating, and to fish were his summer goals. (Swimming and boating are gerunds; to fish is an infinitive.) Correct: Swimming, boating, and fishing were his summer goals. Correct: To swim, to boat, and to fish were his summer goals. Correct: To swim, boat, and fish were his summer goals. 2. Faulty: Heathcliff told Cathy to return with him to his estate and that she could visit Linton. ( Here we have two direct objects, but To return to his estate is an infinitive phrase and that she could visit Linton is a subordinate clause. Either have two phrases or two subordinate clauses.) Correct: Heathcliff told Cathy to return with him to his estate and to visit Linton. Correct: Heathcliff told Cathy that she could return with him to his estate and that she could visit Linton.

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Chapter Four

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Quotation Procedures 1. In American printing practice, periods and commas go inside quotation marks; colons and semicolons go outside. This is not a grammatical rule; it is simply an American printing convention. If you read a book or newspaper published in London, for example, an entirely different practice is followed. a. Faulty: The title in itself has a simile, “like a double-edged sword”. Correct: The title in itself has a simile, “like a double-edged sword.” b. Faulty: In “The Destructors”, Graham Greene makes an interesting

observation about creativity. Correct: In “the Destructors,” Graham Greene makes an interesting observation about creativity. Okay, now we get to the exceptions: Exception # 1: If there is a citation, the punctuation goes after the citation, locking the citation to the sentence to which it actually refers rather than the next sentence. Also, with MLA style there is no “page,“p,” or “pg.” a. Faulty: Maurice is described as “a big fellow with heavy limbs and a forehead that flushed painfully”(page 3). Correct: Maurice is described as “a big fellow with heavy limbs and a forehead that flushed painfully” (3). b. Faulty: He also seems to be “an exceedingly benevolent god, with titles such as Friend and Helper.(90)” (Note that the page number should not be considered part of the quotation.) Correct: He also seems to be “an exceedingly benevolent god, with titles such as Friend and Helper” (90). Exception #2: If there is a long, indented quote, the period goes before the citation. Why? Because with an indented quote, there is no danger of thinking that the citation might refer to the next sentence. Also, no quotation marks are

used with indented quotes. The act of indenting indicates that the material has been quoted. Faulty: In chapter one of Persuasion, Jane Austen speaks of Sir Walter’s vanity by saying that He had been remarkably handsome in his youth; and, at fifty-four, was still a very fine man. Few women could think more of their personal

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appearance than he did; nor could the valet of any new-made lord be more delighted with the place he held in society (3). Correct: In chapter one of Persuasion, Jane Austen speaks of Sir Walter’s vanity by saying that He had been remarkably handsome in his youth; and, at fifty-four, was still a very fine man. Few women could think more of their personal appearance than he did; nor could the valet of any new-made lord be more delighted with the place he held in society. (3) 2. If the quotation ends in a comma or period, omit it and simply have a comma or period after the citation. Use no double punctuation.

a. Faulty: The narrator says that the ceiling had “a shower of glass-drops hanging in silver chains from the centre, and shimmering with little soft tapers,” (pg 46). Correct: The narrator says that the ceiling had “a shower of glass-drops hanging in silver chains from the centre, and shimmering with little soft tapers” (46). b. Faulty: She first portrays Sir Walter as vain by saying, “Vanity was the beginning and the end of Sir Walter Elliot’s character; vanity of person and of situation.” (Ch.1). Correct: She first portrays Sir Walter as vain by saying, “Vanity was the beginning and the end of Sir Walter Elliot’s character; vanity of person and of situation” (Ch.1). Exception: Double punctuation is used if the quotation ends in a question mark or exclamation mark. a. Correct: She says, “I cannot live without my soul!”(165). b. Correct: He later blames his inevitable punishment on fate by shouting, “O, I am fortune’s fool!” (III.i). 3. Italics vs. Quotation Marks

The titles of works that are published as complete units in themselves are placed in italics. Such items include books, the names of newspapers, and plays and long poems that are published by themselves. The titles of short stories, articles in a newspaper, and plays and poems that are part of a collection are placed within quotation marks. The titles of movies and television shows are in italics; a specific episode of a television series would be in quotation marks. a. Faulty: The Destructors (This is a short story by Graham Greene.)

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Correct: “The Destructors” b. Faulty: “The Wind in the Willows” (This is the title of a novel by Kenneth Grahame.) Correct: The Wind in the Willows c. Faulty: He wrote an article entitled Horseracing in “The Lexington Leader.” Correct: He wrote an article entitled “Horseracing” in The Lexington Leader. 4. Tossed-in Quotations

The reader must know who is speaking and the context of the quote. Most quotations need attributives, i.e., the names of the persons to whom the quotes are being attributed. Don’t just plop a quote into your sentence with the expectation that your reader will sort everything out. a. Faulty: Catherine and Heathcliff possess an eternal love for one another. This love is expressed at great length on the day before Catherine’s death: “…Why did you despise me? Why did you betray your own heart, Cathy?”(125). Correct: Catherine and Heathcliff possess an eternal love for one another. On the day before Catherine’s death, Heathcliff cries out, “…Why did you despise me? Why did you betray your own heart, Cathy?” (125). b. Faulty: Everyone knows that when it is daytime, the sun is out and not the moon. “Then God be blessed, it is the blessed sun. But sun it is not, when you say it is not, And the moon changes even as your mind.(IV.v.19-23) Correct: Everyone know that when it is daytime, the sun is out and not the moon. But in The Taming of the Shrew, Kate agrees with Petruchio, proclaiming, “Then God be blessed, it is the blessed sun./ But sun it is not, when you say it is not,/ And the moon changes even as your mind” (IV.v.19-23). [Also note the slant marks—virgules—between lines of poetry when they are quoted within a paragraph.] c. Faulty: Wuthering Heights is described as having an extreme, dark personality of its own, matching its master Heathcliff’s: “the excessive slant of a few stunted firs…a range of gaunt thorns all stretching their limbs one way, as if craving…a quantity of grotesque carving lavished over the front.” Correct: Wuthering Heights is described as matching that of its master. According to the narrator, the haunted surroundings had “a few stunted firs” and “a range of gaunt thorns all stretching their limbs” (29).

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d. Faulty: Their desire for each other never once wavered. “He’s more myself than I am” (80). Correct: Their desire for each other never once wavered. As Catherine told Nelly, “He’s more myself than I am” (80). Faulty: In his Personal Narrative, Jonathan Edwards admits that he sometimes strayed away from God. “But in process of time, my convictions and affections wore off...”(309). Correct: In his narrative, Edwards admits that he sometimes strayed away from God. As the minister explains, “...in process of time, my convictions and affections wore off...” (309).

Correct: Edwards acknowledges that he sometimes strayed from God: “...in process of time, my convictions and affections wore off...” (309). (Here a colon is used to tie the quote to its attributive.) Faulty: One of Franklin’s “greater erratum” occurred when he was helping out Mrs. T. “I grew fond of her company, and being at this time under no religious restraints...I attempted familiarities” (312). Correct: One of Franklin’s “greater erratum” occurred when he was helping out Mrs. T. As Franklin confessed, “I grew fond of her company, and being at this time under no religious restraints...I attempted familiarities” (312). Faulty: He reveals the truly evil person inside himself, “The fury of a demon instantly possessed me.” Correct: Poe’s narrator in “The Black Cat” reveals the truly evil person inside himself when he announces, “The fury of a demon instantly possessed me” (13). Faulty: The absence of his wife’s body in her grave confirms the narrator’s suspicions: “I laughed with a long and bitter laugh as I found no traces of the first, in the charnel where I laid the second—Morella” (110). Correct: The absence of his wife’s body in her grave confirms the narrator’s suspicions. He explains, “ I laughed with a long and bitter laugh as I

found no traces of the first, in the charnel where I laid the second— Morella” (110). 5. Virgules (Slant Marks) As indicated in 4.b, virgules (slant marks) are needed to Separate Lines of Poetry when they appear in paragraph format.

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a. Faulty: In The Taming of the Shrew, Kate says, “ Forward, I pray, since we have come so far, And be it moon, or sun, or what you please. An if you please to call it a rush candle, Henceforth I vow it shall be so for me” (IV.v). Correct: In The Taming of the Shrew, Kate says, “Forward, I pray, since we have come so far,/ And be it moon, or sun, or what you please./ An if you please to call it a rush candle,/ Henceforth I vow it shall be so for me” (IV.v). 6. Punctuation Before Quotes

Don’t automatically assume that every quotation must be preceded by a comma.

a. Faulty: The document itself stated that, “all persons held as slaves…shall be then,

and thenceforward, forever free” (“Transcript”). (The quotation is actually introduced by the relative pronoun that. One would never write, “He said that,

he was a college graduate.” Simply because the sentence has a direct quote doesn’t change the principle that that is introducing the subordinate clause.

Correct: The document itself stated that “all persons held as slaves…shall be then,

and thenceforward, forever free” (“Transcript”).

b. Faulty: He went on to say “I am not…in favor of bringing about…social and political equality”(Pruitt). (Since the word that is not used, a comma should be placed

after say.)

Correct: He went on to say, “I am not…in favor of bringing about…social and

political equality” (Pruitt).

c. Faulty: Historian Eric Foner agrees, saying “Slavery didn’t die on January 1, 1863” ( Stewart). (Saying, like the word say in 6b, needs a comma after it.)

Correct: Historian Eric Foner agrees, saying, “Slavery didn’t die on January 1,

1863” (Steward).

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Chapter Five

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Weak and Strong Essays

I. Characteristics of Weak Essays Apart from grammatical errors, here are some other characteristics of weak essays. A. Padding Example #1: In the opening paragraph below, the student wanders around in generalities and really doesn’t indicated her topic—Max, the Stubborn Little

Wolf—until the second paragraph. And even then, the second paragraph repeats much of what was said in the first paragraph.

When one considers the literature that filled his or her childhood, many stories may come to mind. These stories vary in their depiction of subjects, characters, and themes, but one aspect that appears often among many significant books is the use of animals as characters. As a child, one likely never questioned why an animal in the nightly bedtime story talked or acted like a human. In actuality, the use of anthropomorphism in children’s literature is a unique method of storytelling that serves several purposes. Because anthropomorphic characters compel the reader, convey important lessons, and establish a lasting impact, they are a uniquely integral part of children’s literature. Perhaps the most important aspects of stories centered around anthropomorphic characters are the attributes of the characters themselves. Clearly the depiction of an animal that possesses the qualities of a human is unique and captures the attention of a child who is likely naturally drawn to animals. Furthermore, the animals depicted in such stories usually possess a quality that differentiates them from their peers and creates an opportunity for conflict. In the story, Max, the Stubborn Little Wolf, for example, a young wolf defies the wishes of his father when he refuses to hunt and expresses his desire to become a florist. Example # 2: Here is another essay that begins with padding and needless repetition. Children’s books have an essential role in the lives of the young population. Stories facilitate vocabulary and language skills, provide entertainment and learning experiences, and promote social skills. Books also provide an outlet for expression and

communication for children. When faced with a difficult situation, parents and teachers look for a book to help explain and provide a conversation starter to better address the situation at hand. (Everything in these opening sentences is padding. The read topic—death—will now be mentioned, and mentioned, and mentioned.)One topic that has often been considered complex and problematic to address in literature for any age group is death. The subject is made significantly more troublesome when raised in relation to literature for children. This has contributed to the lack of understanding children have on such an oblique and potentially dark topic. The explanation of death through children’s literature has changed over the course of time

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as average life span has increased and society’s morals, beliefs, and conceptions of children have changed. By analyzing two different children’s books regarding death, these changes are evident, and are shown through the varying approaches the authors take towards discussing the subject. The differences of these two books (What two books?) showcase the effects that time and society has on the discussion of death. Overall it is indicated that it is important to expose children to the concept of death no matter how difficult it may be. The concluding paragraph of this same essay needlessly repeats and repeats what has already been established. Even though death can be difficult and awkward to discuss, children should be exposed to the topic. Literature provides an alternative option for addressing the challenging topic. Books can help children come to understand the concept of death and can assist parents and teachers in discussing the reality of death with children. Books that address death can be read with children and by children themselves as a source of insight, comfort, and emotional guidance. By analyzing The Dead Bird and What Happens When a Loved One Dies it is evident that the theme of death can be approached in different ways. Whether showcasing death through a bird or straightforwardly applying it to humans, there are various ways to introduce the concept of death. Even though society’s perception of death has altered over time, the inevitability of death has not. Therefore, death should be discussed with children in order for them to fully comprehend and accept this unavoidable reality. Example # 3: Padding can also occur elsewhere in the essay. What follows is a penultimate paragraph and the final paragraph.

When transgender students were granted the right to use the bathroom of their choice, parents from all over the United States were up in arms. Transgender people using the bathrooms of their choice has been a hot topic recently, mostly due to a lack of understanding among people that believe they are alienated from the transgender community. (The bathroom issue is suddenly dropped, and the student starts analyzing a particular book.) Providing children with resources such as books when they are young can provide them with the educational foundation they need to be more tolerant and accepting later in life. Be Who You Are is a children’s book that addresses the story of a transgender child. The story is based on the real experiences of the author and her children. Due to her past experience (repetition) with gender identity issues in her own children, the author is a credible source for learning about how to handle these issues within a family (Carr). Her book could be an important resource for parents as well as children. However, books like these can be

problematic. They paint a picture-perfect scene where every family is accepting of their transgender child. On the pages of a picture book this one has a fairytale ending, but in actuality many children are rejected by their parents after coming out. They are not allowed to live out the life that is portrayed in the artistic drawings of children’s books. This rejection (more repetition) often leads to conflict within the family and a toxic environment for the child. The happy portrayal of transgender children in children’s literature can lead to unrealistic expectations on the part of the child. The child may expect (more repetition) his or her narrative to follow that of the book when, in reality, coming out to one’s parents can create a dangerous situation.

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That more LGBT characters are needed in children’s literature is clear. Representation of transgender children in children’s literature is important in that it exposes these members of society to new concepts that may make them more accepting of themselves and/or others later in life. These books also promote self-acceptance (repetition), which is vital in today’s world. However, the perfect fairytale narrative is flawed because not every transgender person’s childhood is full of bliss and acceptance. ( repetition of what was said in the previous paragraph)This creates a potentially dangerous environment(repetition of what was said in the previous paragraph) as a child may approach his or her parents about gender identity topics and the parents may not be as kind as the characters in the children’s book.(more repetition) B. Reference Problems A second paragraph should not begin with a word such as This or These, forcing the reader back to an earlier paragraph in order to locate the attributive. Faulty: “Mockery is the sincerest form of flattery” is an often-misquoted phrase; the proper phrase uses imitation instead of mockery. Regardless of the original wording of the quote, mockery is a common method by which to poke fun at others. The teasing either belittles or empowers the target. Sometimes the mockery is intended to belittle its target; however, the target, who was supposed to feel defeated and frustrated, revels and delights in the attempt and ends up walking away empowered. This was the effect of the book Winners Aren’t Losers. (This second paragraph continues, but note how this has no meaning unless one goes back to the first

paragraph. Such errors also occur when one begins a paper with a title such as “The Role of Manolin in The Old Man and the Sea” and then begins the essay with “In this novel…” instead of “In Ernest Hemingway’s The Old Man and the

Sea….” A paper must be a complete unit in itself, regardless of the title. And no one should have to go back to the title, which may be on a separate page, in order to understand references in the opening paragraph.) C. Secretarial Problems A certain amount of secretarial work is always needed in your opening paragraph. Just because you know what you are writing about does not mean that your reader knows. Notice how the following opening paragraph fails to mention the author’s name and only mentions the book’s title in the last sentence. Also observe the

irrelevant use of the first person and its needless commentary. To one unfamiliar with the plot, a comic book about anthropomorphic cats and mice sounds like a fantastic book for children. However, the very first quote in the book (Here the writer should have mentioned the author and title.) quickly destroys this notion, saying, “The Jews are undoubtedly a race, but they are not human,” attributed to Adolf Hitler. I personally had heard of this graphic novel in high school, and I was aware of its premise, but I had written it off as immature partly due to the medium used. Having now read it, I feel it is safe to conclude that Maus is a very

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mature and human telling of a holocaust survivor’s story despite the medium and characters used. D. New information in the last paragraph The following essay dealt with the history of Newbery and Caldecott awards for children’s literature. But nowhere in the paper are the literary or cultural values of a given year discussed. To introduce such a concern in the final paragraph, and to do so without providing examples or support, is a serious compositional flaw.) The interesting thing about Newbery and Caldecott award-winning books is that they depict a part of history as well as a part of literature. This is because each winner represents a year in which it was written. As the list of winners is examined, it is easy to see the changing values and cultures in America throughout history being reflected in these books. Although recipients from the mid-nineteenth century may not display the same values as the recipients from 2017, they give young readers direct insight into what was valued during that time. It is for this reason that the tradition of the Newbery and Caldecott Medals and Honors will continue to recognize prestigious American Children’s literature for many years to come. II. Strong Essays For samples of how an “A” essay might look, study Katherine Ashley’s analysis of the character Petruchio in William Shakespeare’s The Taming of the Shrew,

and Taylor Senay’s examination of Kenneth Grahame’s novel The Wind in the

Willows as an allegory. Katherine and Taylor were students of mine in 2016 and kindly gave me permission to include these edited examples of their work.

Petruchio: Teacher or Tyrant?

by

Katherine Ashley

A teacher is a person who instructs, while a tyrant is an authority figure who

uses his or her power to oppress. In William Shakespeare’s The Taming of the Shrew,

the audience is left to ponder whether Petruchio is a teacher or a tyrant. Many people

believe he is a teacher because of his success in taming his wife, Kate; however, if one

looks at the actions he takes in order to tame Kate, it is more evident that he is a

tyrant.

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Petruchio’s tyranny immediately commences when he is first being introduced

to Kate, for he has already determined that he will marry her so that he can inherit

her father’s money and property. Adamant, Petruchio insists that they get married the

next Sunday, and he disregards her feelings on the matter. His determination is quite

evident when he says to Kate, “Thus in plain terms: your father hath consented / That

you shall be my wife, your dowry 'greed on, / And, will you, nill you, I will marry you”

(II.i). He then goes on to say to her, “Here comes your father. Never make denial. / I

must and will have Katherine to my wife” (II.i). Petruchio begins his relationship with

Kate by oppressing her feelings and leaving her with no other option than to marry

him, thus marking the inception of his tyranny.

Petruchio’s tyranny continues throughout his marriage to Kate. For example, he

subtly refuses to feed Kate in order to teach her that he is in charge of their marriage.

As Petruchio and Kate sit down for dinner, the servant brings mutton to the table that

Petruchio claims is “burnt.” He yells at the servant, blaming him entirely. Petruchio

throws the meat away while Kate tries to calm him down, saying the meat is, in fact,

fine. Petruchio responds, “I tell thee, Kate, ’twas burnt and dried away. / And I

expressly am forbid to touch it, / For it engenders choler, planteth anger; / And better

’twere that both of us did fast” (IV.i). This ugly episode shows Petruchio to be a tyrant

because he falsely accuses the cook of burning the meat so that Kate will not be able

to eat it for dinner, thus starving her for another day. In an aside, Petruchio says,

Thus have I politicly begun my reign,

And ’tis my hope to end successfully.

My falcon now is sharp and passing empty,

And, till she stoop, she must not be full-gorged,

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For then she never looks upon her lure.

Another way I have to man my haggard,

To make her come and know her keeper’s call. (IV.i)

Here Petruchio states that he has begun his “reign” by not feeding Kate, and will wait

until she obeys him before he allows her to eat again. He also dominates her sleep by

saying, “Last night she slept not, nor tonight she shall not” (IV.i). Withholding food

and sleep from Kate, Petruchio is inarguably oppressive, showing his tyrannical

demeanor.

Petruchio also refuses to let Kate see her family until she consents to his

wishes. This is first evident when they are preparing to go to Baptista’s house for

dinner and Kate makes the comment that they will not arrive until after supper.

Petruchio responds to this comment by saying, “It shall be seven ere I go to horse. /

Look what I speak, or do, or think to do, / You are still crossing it. Sirs, let ’t alone. / I

will not go today, and ere I do / It shall be what o'clock I say it is” (IV.iii). Petruchio

objects to Kate’s visiting her own father’s home because she made the simple

statement that they would arrive after dinner. Then the next evening as Petruchio and

Kate are finally preparing to go to Baptista’s home, they get into an argument

regarding whether the sun or the moon is out at that moment. During their

disagreement, Petruchio says, “Now, by my mother’s son, and that’s myself, / It shall

be moon, or star, or what I list, / Or e'er I journey to your father’s house. / (to

servants) Go on, and fetch our horses back again.— / Evermore crossed and crossed,

nothing but crossed!” (IV.v). Yet again, Petruchio forbids Kate from going to her

father’s, this time because she contradicts him. All of these examples of Petruchio’s

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oppressing Kate come together to establish that Petruchio is not a teacher but, in fact,

a tyrant.

The Wind in the Willows: An Appealing Allegory for All Ages

by

Taylor Senay

For generations, readers of all ages have been drawn to Kenneth Grahame’s The

Wind in the Willows, due in part to the story’s depth. The readers bring almost as

much to the tale as the author, having the freedom to read as shallowly or deeply into

the story as they desire. Young readers identify with the headstrong Toad and eager

Mole; older readers, with the extroverted Rat and grandfatherly Badger. A deeper

reading reveals the allegorical nature of the story. Each of the four main characters—

Mole, Toad, Rat, and Badger—represent a different age and stage in life, allowing

readers to find pieces of themselves and their own experiences within the story.

To young readers, Mole is perhaps the most relatable character in The Wind in

the Willows, as he represents a young child. Mole has lived a sheltered, simple life up

to the beginning of the novel, never travelling far from home—evidenced by the fact

that “Never in his life had he seen a river before” (5)—but now he finds his new world

quite entrancing. Eager to learn about it, Mole hops into Rat’s boat and ventures

down the river. His ignorance is evident to Rat, who observes, “You’re new to [the

river], and of course you don’t know” (10). Like a growing child, Mole does not

understand everything but is curious enough to ask, gladly turning to the more

mature Rat, Toad, and Badger to explain how the world works. His eagerness can

cause trouble, however, when he interacts with Toad. Like a younger brother, Mole

tends to egg Toad on when he tells tales, praising him as a “clever, ingenious,

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intelligent Toad” (142) for breaking out of prison. His childlike curiosity and poor

judgement also lead to trouble when he takes it upon himself to “go out by himself and

explore the Wild Wood” (30). This situation quickly takes a dark turn and requires

Rat’s intervention after Mole gets lost. Of the four main characters in The Wind in the

Willows, Mole is the most childlike and therefore the most open to growth. He learns

“to swim and to row, and [enters] into the joy of running water; and with his ear to the

reed stems he caught, at intervals, something of what the wind went whispering so

constantly among them” (16). Mole has a child’s sense of wonder and lust for life, and

as such, experiences the world of the novel vividly and eagerly, allowing readers to do

the same.

Grahame’s inspiration for The Wind in the Willows came from the bedtime

stories he told his beloved son, Alistair. The most dynamic character in the story is

Mr. Toad, based on Alistair himself. As such, Toad represents something of a spoiled

teenager, self-absorbed and capricious. His fits of fancy come fast and often, each

shorter than the last. The Rat observes, “It’s all the same, whatever he takes up; he

gets tired of it, and starts on something fresh” (12). This mirrors the way adolescents

move from one obsession to the next as they discover new fads. Much like an

irresponsible youth, Toad has little regard for his possessions or himself, caring more

for fun than safety and security. “Toad’s rich,” according to Rat, and although he’s

“not a millionaire” (44), he does not worry about money. He purchases at least seven

motorcars, six of which he wrecks. These wrecks land him in the hospital three times

and rack up terrible fines, to the point that Rat believes he will end up “Killed or

ruined…sooner or later” (44). Toad sees no wrong in any of this, even when Badger

gives him a stern talking-to, declaring, “I’m not sorry. And it wasn’t folly at all! It was

simply glorious!” (71). As they mature, many teenagers come to a point when they

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begin to see themselves as adults, and therefore believe they know what is best for

them, even when elders do not. This is mirrored when Toad refuses to repent or see

his wrong even when confronted by an authority figure. Toad also has an adolescent’s

cheek, confessing, “I’m not a bit sorry or repentant, really, so it’s no earthly good

saying I am; now, is it?” (72). As Grahame’s only child, Alistair was likely rather

spoiled. This is reflected in the openly overindulgent nature of Mr. Toad who, though

often lovable, can be frustratingly petulant and reckless.

Every child needs a parental figure. Rat fills this role for Mole and represents

an adult, knowledgeable of the world but not weary of it. Upon their introduction, Rat

takes Mole under his wing and plainly explains the world to him as they journey down

the River. He does, however, discourage him from growing too bold; when Mole asks

about the Wide World, Rat responds, “that’s something that doesn’t matter, either to

you or me. I’ve never been there, and I’m never going, nor you either, if you’ve got any

sense at all” (10). This demonstrates an almost innate protectiveness Rat feels for

Mole, like a parent for a child. This allegorical relationship is further confirmed by his

chiding of Mole not to “egg [Toad] on” (143). In addition to a parental-type casting, Rat

also has more traditionally “adult” interests, often “murmuring poetry--things to

himself” (14) as he rows and “sometimes [scribbling] poetry” (30) during his waking

hours in the winter. Chapter IX, “Wayfarers All,” places Rat in a position familiar to

older readers, as he makes the difficult decision of responsibility over adventure. A

Sea Rat’s tales entrance Rat, who tells Mole, “Going South, with the rest of

them….Seawards first, and then on shipboard, and so to the shores that are calling

me!” (117). After his initial frenzy dies down, however, and with some encouragement

from Mole, Rat returns to his poetry, “alternatively scribbling and sucking the top of

his pencil. It is true that he suck[s] a good deal more than he scribble[s]; but…the

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cure ha[s] at least begun” (119). Although it takes him time and a little help, Rat

leaves behind an impractical dream and returns to his daily life, a mature decision

that many adults struggle to make.

Mr. Badger appears in the story by reputation well before his true introduction

as a character. Rat gives him a stirring description, telling Mole, “Dear old Badger!

Nobody interferes with him. They’d better not” (10), and later reports that he “Simply

hates Society!” (12). These accounts paint Badger as something of an old curmudgeon,

someone to fear and respect. Once Mole and Rat turn up on his doorstep, however,

his true nature is revealed: Badger represents an elderly person, gruff but kind. He

receives the impromptu visitors with grace, offering “supper and everything” (41) in

addition to shelter. Badger regularly shows this compassion; Otter reports, “I knew

that when people were in any fix they mostly went to Badger, or else Badger got to

know of it somehow” (46), which shows Badger truly cares for his fellows. To Mole, he

is an indulgent grandfather, taking it upon himself to treat Mole’s wounded leg. The

two bond over love of the underground, which causes Badger to become “very friendly

with him” (49), and later to show him around his large home. To Toad, Badger is a

firm but gentle disciplinarian. After resolving to take him in hand, Badger tells Toad,

“I’ll make one more effort to bring you to reason. You will come with me into the

smoking room…and we’ll see whether you come out of that room the same Toad that

you went in” (70). When talking fails, Badger cares for Toad enough to take the next

step and try force, resolving that the three of them will stay with Toad until they have

“converted [him] to a proper point of view” (72). Mole and Rat at no point try to

dissuade Badger from this course of action, indicating that they respect his

judgement. Badger acts as something of a patriarch to the makeshift family unit of

woodland creatures, providing wisdom and guidance whenever needed.

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The main characters of The Wind in the Willows represent archetypal members

of a family: Mole, the inquisitive youngster; Toad, the headstrong teenager; Rat, the

knowledgeable adult; and Badger, the wise grandfather. Readers of all ages are able to

identify with such characters because they see them in their own lives. Readers may

not be the same “age” as badger, but they see their grandfather in him; readers may

be much older than Mole seems to be, but happily remember the days when they were

young and carefree like him. The Wind in the Willows has broad appeal because

readers are able to bring their own experiences to the story. A cast of familiar

archetypes allows readers to “fill in” the characters and experience the story

individually, bringing unique perspectives to the work that allow for many

interpretations and depths of understanding.