the ego is made of fear

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BY ROB WHITEON JANUARY 6, 2012 64 COMMENTS

All of your egos responses come out of fear. He / she who acts fearlessly, is acting fromauthenticity (which is different from the ego).

The ego is your coat of armor; its what you use to

protect yourself.As a child, you started feeling fearfulbecause of the 60,000 NOs you heard between age two andsix. Do you know what you did about that? You created a

false version of the original you IN ORDER TO PROTECT

YOURSELF.

You created this false version of yourself (ego), so no

one could harm your real nature.You were saying to the world, Its not the real me that you arescolding its a false version of me ha ha to you.Not a bad trick, except most of us never dropthe coat of armor; we live our lives from the ego forever reacting to fear (be it fear of intimaterelationships, fear of money, fear of adventure, blah, blah, blah).

You are looking into your ego right now. GOOD! Once you see the basic cause of your ego, life getseasier. Perhaps you cannot shed the ego all at once, like a snake sheds its skin in springtime, but

becoming aware of the cause gives you a great start.

Student: So what is the ego the symptom or the disease?

Teacher: Great question; the ego is the symptom; the disease is the different fears that come with

60,000 NOs.

The secret to success, when dealing with the ego

is this: begin looking at your fears. When I wastwelve, I had pimples on my back. I feared that I wouldbe made fun of, so I always wore a t-shirt at the lake,

when swimming. There, right there, was my ego (mycoat of armor). I decided that I was an individual whomade up my own mind and I decided I would nevertake my t-shirt off in public, and no one could makeme. This decision became part of my egos point of

view. Did the EGO do me harm, or did the FEAR dome harm?

The ego was simply a symptom of the fear the fear did me harm; the fear of being humiliated. Mycoat of armor was to act tough and insist that I think for myself (so nobodys going to tell me what to

do).

So, if you want to recreate yourself anew, dont fight with the ego; look at the fear that

created the ego and deal with that. Why are so many millions afraid of money? They must be so few have it. Why are so many millions afraid of being humiliated? They must be so few dare todance like nobodys watching. Why are so many millions of people afraid of ill-health? They must

be hospitals are filled with people with psychosomatic illnesses (doctors estimate its as high as60%).

All human beings experience fear of one kind or another. Perhaps a few dont, but the rest of us do;

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Ego Is Made of Fear http://robwhitemedia.com/2012/01/the-ego-is-made-of-fear/

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this is why we all have egos.

The answer to recreating oneself anew is to accept the fears you have, and decide to work onridding yourself of them. If you do this effectively, you do not have to deal with your ego; it willvanish on its own. If it has no reason to protect you from fear, it has no raison detre(reason for

being).

2012 is a great year to begin working on your fears fear of poverty, fear of loss of any kind, fear ofcriticism, fear of success, fear of death, fear of loneliness, fear of the world coming to an end(according to the Mayan Calendar). What is one fear that its time to work on?

You took on a personality to hide your fears,

now take on the courage to look directly at yourfears (the fire-eating dragon harrumphs andwalks away when the dragon slayer confronts

him face to face).

With even a small but sincere wish tounderstand your fear, something cracks wideopen your EGO! Now you see things totallydifferent; you are a little more conscious, which

causes more cracking.

What is a fear that gives life to your ego? Whatdo you do to protect yourself from the fear?What past fear no longer affects your attitude or mood? How did you deal with it to vanish it from

your psychic state of being?

Have fun with this; leave us a comment. Your insights bring the conversation alive.

Blessings

Best Comment of the Week.This weeks best comments come from Elena Patrice ofWebSitesGiveBackand Anastasia James. Thank you both for your honest, heartfelt sharing. Seetheir comments here.

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Kara says:January 6, 2012 at 5:09 am

Good one rob. The fear Im working on is my fear of looking dumb. I get sooo scaredthat people will think Im stupid when I try to add to conversations. This is especially true atwork. Like, Ill have a great idea in a meeting and be too scared to say it and the next thing I

know someone else is saying and getting all kinds of praise. I HATE THAT!!! Ive got to learn

not to hold back. I know I have a lot of awesome creativity in me that needs to come out. I couldreally shine if I wasnt so scared. Being brave with my ideas is a huge one if Im going to bemaking a $100,000 at a marketing firm by the end of the year. I dont know why I get so shy.Just one great idea can really launch a career. Once I find a firm to hire me I am going all outwith my ideas no matter how awkward I feel. I once heard that being a great actor or actress is

about being willing to make a fool of yourself. I think thats true with anything. I cant wait to

make a fool of myself in 2012!

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rob says:January 6, 2012 at 2:27 pm

Hi Kara, I love that you cant wait to make a fool of yourself in 2012. The ego willhave none of that! When we are willing to look foolish, the world that looked strange anduncomfortable suddenly becomes real and comfortable. We have extraordinarybreakthroughs! Blessings.

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Jeremy Brown says:January 8, 2012 at 3:39 pm

Hi there Kara,

I think that is a common fear many people have. I too had that fear; its not totally gone, butits way better now than in years past. No one wants to look dumbno one.

This is how I battle that fear.

Self talk. When I feel that fear creeping in and holding me back from saying anything, I think

to myselfwhat do I have to lose? If my idea is dumb at least I have the courage to saysomething and bottom lineso what.

Its funny how our minds work. We shoot ourselves in the foot even before were able tovoice our opinions/ideas. What I found was 9/10 times when I said screw you fear, Im goingto do what I need to do, ( that generally snaps me back to reality and the fear subsides)my

ideas/opinions/etc were welcomed with open arms.

As Rob said, crack that suit of armor! Stay motivated and kick that fear in the backside Kara!

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rob says:January 10, 2012 at 9:23 am

Hi Jeremy. If my idea is dumb at least I have the courage to say somethingand bottom lineso what I love the hutspah, Jeremy. A bird walking along the

seashore cannot see the immensity of the ocean until he spreads his wings and flies!blessings

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The Viziersays:January 6, 2012 at 12:17 pm

Hi Rob,

I agree with you. The ego is made of fear. It is our coat of armor used to protect a certainself-image or false identity that we have about ourselves. Because this self-image is the veryidentity that we have, if it is threatened it will shake our lives to its very core and foundation. It istherefore no surprise that our ego responds like a lion to defend it. We believe that our

self-image/false identity is real and that without it, we are nothing. But here, how our ego

responds is different from person to person. Some do so in an aggressive way, others do so in apassive way.

Yes it is true. The ego is the symptom and fear is the disease. This is truly a penetrating insight

to many problems in life. If we rid ourselves of our fears, our egos vanish on its own. By tacklingthe source instead of the symptom, we resolve problems once and for all and subsequentlyremove our egos with little effort.

Even so, it is not easy to quickly eradicate fear that has gained strength over the years. And ifyou have many different fears, it would not be prudent to deal with them all at once since it can

be overwhelming. It would be better to single out and focus on removing one fear at a time.

I suppose a fear of failure is something that gives life to my ego. Even though I have the optionof knowing the outcome of my actions in advance, sometimes I fear to know the answerbecause it might not be what I want. Thus, by carrying on doggedly, I hope against hope that myactions can change things since it is 50-50.

From now on, I will make an effort to know the outcome of my actions beforehand. This way, ifthe path leads to a dead end, I can correct myself early, saving time and effort.

Thank you for sharing this lovely article!

Irving the Vizier

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Hi Irving. Your comment is superb. You said what I was trying to say better than I

said it. This is because you related it to your life, and the truth poured forth, uninhibited bythe ego. When we run away from our problems, we neither understand them or end them. Itis extremely useful to endure the uncomfortable fears we experience with a watchful mind.Therein lies our growth! Thank you.

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Brian Driggs says:January 6, 2012 at 5:24 pm

Do what you fear most and you control fear.


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I dont know who originally came up with that, but its been with me for years. Probably pops intomy mind once a week. I know I am afraid of the changes I need to make in order to achieve mydreams. Some days I win. Some days I lose. But every day is a chance to try again.

6 days smoke-free, now, cold turkey. Its scary as hell, but gets easier with each passing day.

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Hi Brian. Courage is the excitement of living dangerously, isnt it. 6 days smoke free

thats a great start to disidentifying with the you that smokes to alleviate nervousness. Whyare we so reluctant to give up a bad habit ah, the insanity of humanity. I like your honesty.Blessings

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Deeone says:January 6, 2012 at 6:26 pm

Good day Rob,

This was really good stuff, my friend! Ive been dealing with and writing about this very thing forthe last couple of weeks. Fear is a monster. I realized with me that I had a lot of fears placedin me, even before I knew what fear was. In the book Im writing at the moment I talked directly

about how when we are very young we are flooded with beliefs, ideas, and quite frankly junk.Other peoples baggage and mistakes that we carry around with us, we wear them as thoughthey were ours to adorn.

Ive had many of the fears you mentioned here in this very post. Many of the fears I wasnt evenaware that I had taken on.But from doing a lot of soul searching and being completely honestwith myself, Ive been able to face many of my fears.

Heres what Ive been doing I listen to my intuition and my ego. Ive learned both of theirvoices. I act when either of them speak. When my intuition tells me to do something, I jump onit. When my ego tells me not to do something out of fear; I jump on that too. Just because my

ego doesnt want me too.

I still have growth that needs to take place with in me, because I sometimes allow my ego to winthe battle. But just like you mentioned above, slowly but surely my ego is winning less and lessof the battles between us.

I have definitely seen the growth with in me over the last year. The person I was January 2010and 2011, would cower away if he were to meet who I am now in 2012. The confidence inmyself has grown exponentially! Its not to be confused with ego fueled confidence Im

comfortable with who I am and where I am, and with what Ive endured; and Im no longer lettingany of it hold me back any longer as they used to do.

The fear Im actually working on now is the fear of acceptance acceptance of the power thatswithin me. I know that its there, but the old me wants so badly to hold on. I keep kicking him off,but hes got a power grip like you wouldnt believe. But just like his friend ego, he too will lose

this battle.

Thanks for such an awesome post! I really enjoyed this read!

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Hi Deeone. In about a month, Deeone, you are going to experience an invisible

miracle. Most folks let their visible circumstances dictate their invisible state. BEWARE! Youare so ripe! Through cosmic insight (which you are now exhibiting), your invisible state willattract a miracle a breakthrough that is too easy to explain. this is all that a miracle is something that is too easy to explain. Did you know that? You have much to do to get ready;so get busy! Blessings

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Bryan Thompson says:January 6, 2012 at 7:05 pm

Great reminder, Rob! The ego is always that checked voice that says, Wait, whatwill people think if I? That one question has held millions of people from pursuing theirdestiny. The voice of the ego has held me back plenty! The voice of adventure is the voice ofreal life. Hope your own adventure is off to a good start!

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Hi Bryan. By intelligently noticing a negative condition (an anxious ego), we canend it. This proves that real intelligence conquers all. You are real intelligence, Bryan. Keepgoing. Blessings


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rus says:January 6, 2012 at 8:50 pm

Yeah man. That ego is nasty, tricky little devil! Im one who is all about being as openand egoless as possible. I dont get wrapped up in vanities or money or trying to look smart orwhatever people do. BUT BUT the ego is so tricky. I have a fear of loosing my peacefulpersonae! Sometimes I notice Im trying so hard to look peaceful that I forget to BE peaceful. Its

crazy. Its like my mind is running around in circles about how I can offer my werid Rus-Buddah-

Wisdom or whatever, and I totally check out of the situation. Before I know it Im sayingsomething clever just to look good but has nothing to do with being real. Thats a situation whereI would have been better off just shutting up and listening deeply, instead of trying to be thispeaceful sage dude personae.

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Hi rus. The ego is, indeed, a tricky fella. People run through life screaming,Please dont scare me. The ego laughs behind their backs; it feeds on fear it has toscare them. Blessings

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Patricia says:January 6, 2012 at 8:51 pm

Just finished reading Anthony De Mellos book Awareness and it is about awakeningand how that insight lets one understand FEAR and then how to let go awareness buildsunderstanding, which is something that builds change.

I am in transition right now.changingfascinating to be aware of what is going on within andwithout the self

Lots to think about here thank you for sharing

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Hi Patricia.

Student: I know more than I can do.

Teacher: I am glad you realize that; you can know for years before being able to use theknowledge.

You, Patricia, are now ready to use the knowledge you know.

Blessings

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Justin Mazza says:January 6, 2012 at 10:51 pm

Hey Rob,Great post on the true meaning of the word ego. What feels wonderful to me is when I am

around people that I can let my guard down. In this world though it is often necessary to wearthat suit of armor especially in places that are crowded.

I think that is why I moved to the country.

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Patricia says:January 7, 2012 at 12:18 am

I have a little audio gift on my blog this weekendwould like to share it with you

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I like it thank you

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Alex Blackwell | The BridgeMakersays:January 7, 2012 at 8:57 am


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Rob,

Fear is what keeps me stuck in my comfort zone. To neutralize my fear, the first thing is simplyto acknowledge it; consider what it is costing me; and then making the choice to take that firststep outside of my comfort zone. When I realize that first step hasnt killed me, my fear begins to

shrink!

Alex

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rob says:

January 7, 2012 at 12:31 pm

Hi Alex. Your words are wise (as often they are). I have a question. Do you askyourself, Where are these truths taking me, these truths that I share? Great! Just remain inthat state of inquiry. You will see. Blessings

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Jeremy Brown says:January 8, 2012 at 3:48 pm

Hey Alex,That pit of mediocrity is down right depressing isnt it? No one wants to be mediocre, but somany people fall into the trap because they never take that initial step out of their comfort

zone.

The fact that you realize the importance of getting out of your comfort zone, is fantastic!

Keep taking steps (big and small) and eventually youll find that nothing can hold youbacknot even the echoing nos as Rob likes to call it.

Stay motivated!

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Hi Jeremy. Nothing can hold us down, except one thing: the fact that we

attribute power to the fear that we hold in our minds. This seems so easy to intellectuallyunderstand, and yet so hard to emotionally accept. I like to think Ive accepted this fact astrue, but still I find myself fearful in the face of certain challenges in different domains ofmy life. Blessings

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sylvia says:January 7, 2012 at 2:07 pm

Its too big a step for me to make all at once. I will use this thought to discover the

fears that trigger the ego. Then I can look the dragon in the eye. My ego, she, shows up when I feel I need to impress important people.when I feel I am not being respected or valued.when I feel unknowledgeable like when ladies talk about designers or guys about sportswhen I feelthey are all when I feels. So ego comes from protecting my feelings. I alreadyknow that feelings often are mis perceiving whats really going on, The best example of this isits not about me. I meet a friend in the street and their greeting is not quite warm enough(whatever that is) I spend an hour a minute or a week asking myself what I did when actually,they had just realized they forgot something and were distracted. What a waste of life. So I hide

behind an ego to protect my feelings that I know dont perceive accurately. Exactly Isnt greatto be human.

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Hi sylvia. A woman who finds that she really is living in a cave, begins to change.You are glimpsing the sunlight. Isnt it warm and bright! Thank you for your sincerity.Blessings

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Dia says:

January 7, 2012 at 6:59 pm

Hi Rob,

Great post as usual! Fear have many of us clippled in life. One of the best ways to combat fearis to face it. When I face whetever Im fearing, worry and anxiety tend to subside. When itcomes to money, I must admit that sometimes I have fear of not achieving what I wantfinancially. Ive been thinking for the past week or so about one of your posts Rob about money.


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You mentioned when you decided to become financially free, you started to become one withmoney and you would no longer let money issues upset you. My question is, at that time, howdid you react when negative thoughts about the lack of money surface? In other words, howwere you able to become one with money? Did you do special daily exercises to help you?This is the one area I want to conquer in life. Thanks for sharing my friend

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Hi Dia. Get in touch with me. I want to speak with you. I believe you live near me

(within fifty miles or so).How did I deal with my fear of poverty (which is really a fear of money)? What exercise did Ido to overcome my fear of being rich with money? Heres a few of the preliminary steps Itook:

Step 1: I would constantly remind myself that I was an unconscious man, thinking I was

conscious, when it comes to money.

Step 2: I would remind myself that I will never attract large amounts of money into my life aslong as I delude myself into thinking I was ready to attract a lot of money when I was notready.

Step 3: I noticed that I was suggestible and had fallen under the influence of people whowanted to say they wanted to make a lot of money (which is a very different kind ofpersonality than the person who wants to make a lot of money).

I hope you learn something about yourself from this. You tell me the next step, okay?

Blessings

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Roger Pascal says:January 7, 2012 at 7:18 pm

Hi Rob. You got my thinking about what my fears are and once I started thinkingabout my fears I could see how my ego comes out. My big fear is that Ive always secretlyworried that I am not competent or not good enough at my work to be able to be a provider.There has always been a lot of fear and doubt surrounding my confidence about making aliving. I know Im good at construction and project management, but I also realize a lot of otherpeople are. Its always a constant worry about where the next job will come from etc. The endresult is I overextend myself or make promises I cant keep. My ego takes on a facade of super

competency when all the while Im scared as hell! It has been tough to deal with because I then

lash out at my crew for making mistakes and would then bring my anger home to the family. Asyou know, Im learning to relax. I actually realize I can be confident in my work and honest withmyself. Everyone is a lot happier when my ego is not trying to be Super Man.

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Hi Roger. My ego takes on a facade of super competency when all the while Imscared as hell thank you for revealing that. You are not alone. You once said that youwanted to learn a new sense of rightness. Association with right ideas is essential, butbeware the ego when it takes a wrong idea and insists it is right. That is what you ego isdoing when it takes on a facade of competency. What do I mean by that? blessings

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GeorgieBoy 1969 says:January 7, 2012 at 8:47 pm

Very wise, Rob. Its interesting how ego plays such different roles throughout ourlives. Just when think you have your own ego figured out, you realize you dont know a thing.Looking at myself as a teenager I can obviously see how our fears cause our egos to do allkinds of whacky things. I spent 4 years playing football and hating every minute of i t just so Icould be on the team. The intense fear of not fitting in or having an identity made me put myselfthrough physical and emotional ringers every season. When I got to wear my letter jacket therest of the year it all seemed worth it! I probably had to get it a size too big just to fit all my ego

in there! Luckily, I can learn from these growing pains because they are still very relevant today.You know, Ive lots of fear facing the changes of retirement. I want to make sure I am doingthings I love now. Ive got to catch myself when I find Im worrying about looking foolish. Just acouple weeks ago I refused to attend a figure drawing class with my wife. Not for any goodreason, but I think I was scared of looking like a bored retiree who knows I could have loved

it.

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Hi Georgie. Ive got to catch myself when I find Im worrying about looking foolish thatsa big one. I have plenty of work left to do on myself, and one of those things is to allowmyself to look as foolish as I need to look in order to have a breakthrough. I wonder if othershave the same timidity as we do you? YES! blessings

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Carol Anne says:January 8, 2012 at 1:03 pm

I like that coat of armor metaphor Rob. I have lots of new fears in my life due tosome big changes. After a lifetime of overcoming old fears about women in business and allthat, all of a sudden I have a whole new coat of armor I am carrying around. Ive learned tobecome aware of when my ego is taking over, but this helps me understand what the fear is. Forthe first time ever in my life I started having fears of the holiday season. I put on a big coat ofarmor just to get through the holidays this year. Thats something I never would have done in thepast. Its comforting to know that this doesnt have to be permanent. Im a big holiday person, soI will have to start looking forward to starting some new traditions and finding that holiday cheer

again.

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Hi Carol Anne. I put on a big coat of armor just to get through the holidays thisyear thank you for sharing this fact. All can look like it is going well on the outside, but if

things arent going well on the inside whats it worth? Your feelings are teachers what arethey teaching you about yourself that youve not yet noticed? Youve come far keep ongoing. blessings

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John says:January 9, 2012 at 5:03 am

I think my ego makes me hold back. Being a great performer has a lot to do withlearning to let go of the ego. Of course big rock stars have huge egos, but they also have acompletely ego-less side. I dont believe you can just get up on stage and hang it out there ifyou are coming from ego. We all know the ones who get up and pose and preen but dont reallyhave anything going on. You can pose and preen and express yourself authentically wi thout

ego I think those are the ones who really blow us away. What their egos make them do off

stage is another story Im sure. But for me, sometimes I get hung up when Im writing a newsong and imagine what would your mother say if she heard that! Its strange but it makes mefearful and limits my creativity. Or I worry about trying something new because I think othermusicians will criticize it. Things would definitely be different If I could figure out how not to hold

back. Like all these rappers that make it big somehow they have figured out how not to worryabout what their mothers are thinking! Ha. I admire audacity in all music.

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Hi John. I admire audacity in all music you admire audacity because its so

contrasts a scared rabbit that darts off in every direction. Humans are not darting rabbits; weare soaring eagles. Think about that. Great! Remain in that state. I like what you offer here.blessings

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iamoel says:January 9, 2012 at 12:16 pm

I think when people are stuffed with fear, they hide to different egos. Just like the textsays. But i also think when you have fears or you fear, its a perfect appetite for ego. And whenyour ego is on cause of the fear, you kind of a think that world spins around you. That leads tolot of stupid things, like thinking about what other people think about you, or you presume howeverything goes in your life, whatever you decide to do. I think that is the reason so many

people are bored with their lives. It all the same in the end! Its a vicious circle, pretty much.

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Hi iamoel. I also think when you have fears its a perfect appetite for egoWell said, my friend. Who is the devil? The devil is simply the personification of everythingperceived as fearful. One of our inherent liberties is to live ego-free, which is to deny the

devil dominance in our lives. Thats what I believe. Blessings

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iamoel says:January 9, 2012 at 12:18 pm

The real truth is that everyone is really a single living organ, just part of the nature,and universe. Any comments?

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Hi again, iamoel. The real truth is that everyone is really a single living organ YES, this is the real truth; yet, human beings (including me) complicate the simplicity of thisreal truth with tumbling words that trip us up (dont we?). Thank you

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Elena Patrice says:January 9, 2012 at 4:34 pm

Hello Rob!

Ah, the ego! Eek! is my normal response. Interesting because that coat of armor tries tohide a heck of a lot. When I was growing up I built a tough exterior and nobody was going to get

to me. To the outside world I was in-your-face and nothing bothered me talk about fear!Whoa! Inside I was cowering and truly one word could blow wall surrounding my heart to pieces.If anyone asked me what was wrong or offered a safe place I would act like the world wasgreat and I didnt need anyone. Fear, fear, fear. It wasnt until I was older and the crack in thearmor got a little bigger and then bigger where I let the world start to see what was underneath

it, that I began to shed it. What a process and youre so right with the whole crackling process thats what it takes. I think you take those steps only when the fear turns to too much pain tobear. Things will change when the pain from the fear is too much to bear that youd rather just

address the fear either in increments or head on because the alternative is just far, far toopainful. Its like you weigh which is worse and thats where your journey begins.

Ive let go of plenty of fears and truthfully, there are some that have taken their place instead.Ah, but I do know what Im dealing with and am in the midst of that exact struggle right now. So this post is like a lifejacket being thrown out and I m going to swim with in on while I addressthis if thats OK. I thank you for this! (And to think youre not charging for my therapy. ;))

Lots to digest here as always Rob!!

Wishing you a superior week! (Thank you as well for the mention about my comment. You makeme think and bring out the best in me thats your gift and Im so grateful!).

Kindness always,

Elena

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Hi Elena. Ive let go of plenty of fears and truthfully, there are some that havetaken their place instead I like your willingness to speak frankly about yourself. You arenot alone with this problem.

A tsunami washed a womans home into the ocean three times. She finally had the smarts tomove off the oceans edge. Beware of your psychological location. When new waves of fear

come to harass you, its time to move your psychological home. I know you know this. Thismetaphor will help you absorb the lesson deeper.

Thank you

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Elena Patrice says:

January 10, 2012 at 6:32 am

Thank YOU Rob!

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Jenny Ann Frasersays:January 9, 2012 at 8:15 pm

Hi Rob,This is awesome in the face of what I am working on in my own life. I thought that I understood

the connection between fear and ego, but it never occurred to me to work on fear to f ree myselffrom ego. Fascinating!I actually posted today in my blog about being authentic, and about how I spent so much of mylife hiding myself due to fear of judgement and rejection. When I began writing, I realized that Ididnt have anything useful to say unless I wrote authentically. The result of letting go of that fear

and allowing the real me to speak was overwhelming support, admiration and gratitude. Thecomplete opposite of what I had always expected. This also makes anyones scorn or criticismfairly unimportant to me. Knowing what I know now, I cant help but wonder how much better theworld would be if we learned to live from a place of authenticity rather than fear. We would haveso much less to fear because real people can be trusted to show their true selves, making itmuch easier for us to feel safe.

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Hi jenny. the one thing that stops us from expressing authentically is the ego .and guess what it uses to stop us? FEAR! If you express authentically, you kill off the ego,and it will do whatever it has to in order to prevent this. Being human is a trip, isnt it.Blessing

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SaltySailorMan says:January 9, 2012 at 9:43 pm

Thats always been a hard one for me Rob. When I have fears, my tendency is to sayF-it I must be scared for a reason. And if Im scared whats the point of making myselfuncomfortable. Maybe there is always a balance between good fears and bad fears and itshard to know which is which. But on the other hand, I can see that a lot of the things I am mostgrateful for required overcoming my resistance. As a younger man I didnt want to start a familybecause (and forgive the pun) I didnt want to rock the boat of this sailors bachelorhood. I had

to overcome a lot of fear and Im glad I did. I also feared Dick Cheney turned out I was righton that one.

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Hi Salty. When I have fears, my tendency is to say F-it. Anger is always aconsequence of fear, Salty. When we feel confident and peaceful, we dont find ourselvessaying F-it, do we. You make the most of small gains, thats why youve gotten so far on yourquest. Blessings

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Alicia says:January 10, 2012 at 5:14 am

Hi Rob. What always stuck with me was when you told me that the ego is veryclever when you lop of one head it grows another one back. Ive found this to be the truth timeand time again. I guess we always will have some fears to overcome. I always think I am over

my money fear, but even when I have some extra money I find myself fearing I will lose it. I havemoments of money confidence, but there always seems to be an underlying fear that somethingis going to go wrong.

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Hi Sylvia. there always seems to be an underlying fear that something is going togo wrong. This, right here is the power of the ego. it always wants you to have an underlyingfear that something is going to go wrong. I had a friend say, I try to learn your lessons, butalways feel that Im too stupid to really grasp them Again, the fear of not having what ittakes has her fearfully think this way. Our true nature (curious and ambitious) never feelstupid or fearful that something is going to go wrong, does it. Blessings

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Alan007 says:January 10, 2012 at 9:34 pm

Hi Rob. I never thought of my fear of being alone as having anything to do with ego. Imean I worry that I look like a loser or something. But I dont see how my ego is making me


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strike out. I used to have a fear of approaching women, but Ive gotten over that. If I have a fearof being alone, but Im not scared about talking to women and asking them out how comenothing ever really goes beyond that? Im assuming there is something I dont see. I dont think Ihave a big ego and start pretending that nobody is good enough for me. I actually think Id be agood boyfriend for lots of girls out there. Maybe Im too nice? If Im too nice is that ego too?

Maybe girls actually want guys with big egos? Maybe my lack of ego is the problem? SorryIm kind of rambling but Im just trying to figure myself out.

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Hi Alan. YES, being too nice is an aspect of the ego. It is a consequence of feelinsecure. Being too nice is powerless to lift up ones life. Blessings

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Richard Roma says:January 11, 2012 at 5:25 am

Oh man oh man. My Ego used to run my entire life! When I was youngerEVERYTHING I did was driven to make money just so I could inflate my ego. Cars, watches,clothes it was never enough. I think the 80s was the decade of Ego Madness for a lot ofpeople my age. Ive learned that the Ego is powerful and has an incredible ability to get thingsdone and take care of business. I was raking in the money at the apex of my career (problemwas it was all going right out the door!). Sometimes its when you think you are having the most

fun is when you are the most scared of life. What I learned from that is that no matter howsuccessful we are and how crazy the ego gets, there is definitely an authentic soul or somethingthat wants something different for us. The ego does its best to block out that voice, but it is justa matter of time before we hit rock bottom. Rock bottom is natures way of telling us tostraighten out and fly right! Im done with rock bottom thats no fun! One thing that keeps me

on the up and up these days is fear of sinking that low again. Its a dark, dark place to be.

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Hi Richard. You speak of the decade of Ego Madness; what about folks who live alifetime with Ego Madness? I like that Ego Madness thats precisely what it is. Thank

you

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Bryce Christiansen says:January 11, 2012 at 11:31 am

Hi Rob,

Glad to finally be back and commenting again. I really loved the art on this one as well.

I love how you connected the concepts of ego and fear. Its very true how those two can affecteach other and throw us off balance.

The knight and dragon are excellent metaphors for this as well.

Good to be back,

Bryce

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Hi Bryce. Nice to hear from you. Finding right answers and making right decisionsis a matter that should NOT be given to the ego, should it. Thank you

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Magic Marc says:January 11, 2012 at 9:32 pm

Ohhhh snap SON WHAT? ARe you talkin to ME!! HAHAHhAhA You know some

people say I have a big EGO ( ) but I think there is a big difference from FEAR EGO and myEGO that just gets SHIZ done! You know what I mean? Its like my Ego gives me super

confidence and makes me a winner. I know its not me but I use it to my advantage. We gots toput up a personae in this world if we are going to break out from the wannabes! The way I see itis I dont got a FEAR EGO. I got a EGO thats under MY thumb. It brings in the Benjamins and it

brings in the BROADS!!! HAHAHAhHHA. People who know the real me, know that I got a softside. Just as long as I know whos running the show I ll be JUST FINE trust me! Man, I like myEGO as far as I can see its just the REAL ME on STEROIDS. All i say is you got to play your

EGO or it will be PLAYIN YOU like FOOL! PAX PAX PaXXX OUT!


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Hi Magic. I got a EGO thats under MY thumb Im not so sure that is really thecase Magic. Authentic power is natural and relaxed; your power seems a tad uptight (if I maysay so). Blessings

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Angry Ramone says:January 12, 2012 at 5:46 am

Hey Rob, You got me stirred up this week. I realized all my anger is a coat of armor Iput up. Its always been my dont mess with me strategy. Since I was a little kid I canremember just using anger playing pick up basketball (or whatever) just to win or feel better if I

lost. Its crazy that I just carried that same game plan into adulthood! Its just fear for sure. Evenwhen job searching I automatically resort to anger if I dont get a call back or something fallsthrough. Theres nothing I love more than telling stories about how horrible the economy is andhow stupid all these companies are for not hiring me! Im not sure how to deal with thosestruggles, but at least I can see it is still the 13 year old me trying to feel better about myself.

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Hi Ramone. Its always been my dont mess with me strategy that strategy isdefinitely the egos creation. Most folks who act from that strategy think they are acting fromthemselves; theyre not! You are becoming aware. Awareness is power. Blessings.

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Wynton the Sax says:January 12, 2012 at 9:35 pm

Hmmm yeah man I seen that ego stop many careers in my day. Its always themost talented dudes that put up the biggest front. Nothing makes me crazier than wastedtalented, ya know. Ego makes us give up on our own God given talents. Talent can only takeyou so far. To really make it in this world you have to be humble and go through the shit. Egomakes people think they are entitled to easy success. Musicians who are not willing to put intheir time and take every shitty gig in every shitty club are just scared to see if they really got

what it takes.

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ed says:June 25, 2013 at 1:15 am

Hey Rob, great article ive been doing this recently through meditation and its beenworking but i feel like im still missing a piece of the puzzle.

my fear takes the form of performance anxiety. sometimes (this was worse years ago) i get soworked about about worrying if i can get it up in when i should that i get too nervous and i losemy erection.

like i said it doesnt happen so much anymore, but the fear and worry is still there. it stems from

my very first time i couldnt get it up, due to worry and since then ive always had the thought inback of my head.

its ruined one relationship, but i wont give up. most of the time i can keep the worry at bay butsometimes it will take over and i feel totally helpless.

i already went to the doctor, im well above average in the hormonal department.

so my question how can i stop this fear and worry? if im great in bed i worry about my ability torecreate that, if im bad in bed i worry about repeating it.

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Leonardo says:June 26, 2013 at 2:44 am

Short and sweet, very insightful!

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Nana says:February 1, 2012 at 3:28 pm

Good debate


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[...]I can see a lot of different points of view on either side of this subject[...]

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attachment parentingideasparenting gears says:March 18, 2012 at 2:31 am

attachment parentingideasparenting gears

[...]The Ego Is Made of Fear | MindAdventure.com[...]

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no more panic, no more panic attacks, no more anxiety attacks says:March 28, 2012 at 4:10 am

no more panic, no more panic attacks, no more anxiety attacks

[...]The Ego Is Made of Fear | MindAdventure.com[...]

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the ego is made of fear

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