tempted, tested, true

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Tempted, Tested, True

A Proven Path to Overcoming

Soul-Robbing Choices

Arnie Cole and Michael Ross

7Arnie Cole and Michael Ross, Tempted, Tested, True

Bethany House, a division of Baker Publishing Group, 2013. Used by permission.


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2013 by Anie Cle an Michael Rss

Publishe by Bethany Huse Publishes

11400 Hampshie Avenue Suth

Blmingtn, Minnesta 55438

www.bethanyhuse.cm

Bethany Huse Publishes is a ivisin

Bake Publishing Gup, Gan Rapis, Michigan

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Libay Cngess Catalging-in-Publicatin Data

Cle, Anie.

Tempted, tested, true : a proven path to overcoming soul-robbing choices / Arnie Cole and Michael Ross.

p. cm.

Summay: Ministy leae uses suvey eseach an pesnal naatives t teach eaes the mstefective ways t vecme temptatin--Pvie by publishe.

Inclues bibligaphical eeences.

ISBN 978-0-7642-1085-3 (pbk. : alk. paper) 1. Temptation. 2. Success--Religious aspects--Christianity.

I. Rss, Michael, 1961- II. Title.

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Emphasis in Sciptue qutatins, shwn by italics, is the auths.

Unless otherwise identified, Scripture quotations are rom the Holy Bible, New International Version.NIV. Cpyight 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Use by pemissin Znevan. Allights eseve wlwie. www.znevan.cm

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13 14 15 16 17 18 19 7 6 5 4 3 2 1Arnie Cole and Michael Ross, Tempted, Tested, True

Bethany House, a division of Baker Publishing Group, 2013. Used by permission.


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5

Dedication

From Arnie

For two great guysBill Bantz and Harold Berry.

Thanks, Bill, or encouraging me to pursue the dream

o evangelism by daily spiritual growth. And thanks,Harold, or teaching me the power o praying with a

riend. Youve both reminded me that, regardless o age,

temptatin leaves n ne untuche.

And or one incredible womanmy wie, Char. Ater

twenty yeas, yu still cy when I leave aaway places.

Yue amazing!

From Michael

F Past Ba an Rhna Capente . . . an my whle

Cnnecting Pinte amily.

For Tifany and Christopher. I love you more and more

each ay.

Arnie Cole and Michael Ross, Tempted, Tested, TrueBethany House, a division of Baker Publishing Group, 2013. Used by permission.


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Keep yu eyes nJesus, wh bth began an

finished this race were in. Study how he did

it. Because he never lost sight o where he washeadedthat exhilarating finish in and with

Ghe cul put up with anything alng the

way: Cross, shame, whatever. And now hes there,

in the place o honor, right alongside God. When

you find yourselves flagging in your aith, go over

that story again, item by item, that long litany

hstility he plwe thugh. That will shtadrenaline into your souls! (Hebrews 12:23

THE MESSAGE).



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7

Acknowledgments

S many peple helpe us shape this bk, as well as u pevius

ne, Unstuck: Your Lie. Gods Design. Real Change. We like t

especially thank these iens:

Tami Weissetexecutive vice pesient Back t the Bible.

Her blogs and her radio and speaking platorms have helped us

get ntice in this nisy wl.

Dr. Pamela Ovwighoexecutive director o the Center or Bible

Engagement. She has spent the past seven years analyzing the spiri-

tual lives o more than 100,000 people, and then she shared her

finings with us. (See chaptes 4 an 5.)

Jack Burkeministry advancement team or goTandem. He

crisscrosses the nation, generating excitement or our Bible en-

gagement message, as well as our mobile spiritual-growth tool.

(Check ut goTandem.com.)

Tifany Rosswie, mother, and childrens director at Con-

necting Pointe Church o the Nazarene in Lincoln, Nebraska. Her

theological insights and commonsense ministry instincts have been

wven int these pages.Char Colewie, mother, co-owner o Still Waters Ranch in

Hickman, Nebaska. She ea evey w within these pages, an



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8 Acknowledgments

then gave her thumbs-up before we went to press. Her editorial

suggestins helpe us cat a pweul esuce.

Greg Johnsonpresident o WordServe Literary Group in Col-

orado. Hes much, much more than an agent. Hes our brotherin Chist!

Three talented colleagues at Back to the Bible/goTandem who are

assisting us with design, sales, and marketingMeredith Megrue,

Rhna Capente, an Kevin Sheen.

Tp-ntch eelance wites wh shae thei sties with us

Theresa Cox (chapter 2), David Barshinger, PhD (chapter 3), Kelly

Combs (chapter 6), Sue Cameron (chapter 8), Deidra Riggs (chap-

tes 9 an 10), Michelle DeRusha (Ening Pint).

The Minnesota-based editorial and marketing teams at Bethany

HouseChristopher Soderstrom, Julie Smith, Andy McGuire,

Bett Bensn, Caa Ca, Tim Petesn, Steve Oates, Davi H-

tn, an Jim Paish.



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Contents

Starting Point: Immobilized and Neutralized 000

1. From the Garden to the Desert . . .

and On to the Cross 000

Our Age-Old Battle With a Deadly Menace

NUDGE 1: Learn to Be God-Centered

2. The Life Cycle of a Dangerous Choice 000

Four Stages o Temptation

NUDGE 2: Pinpoint Your Weaknesses

3. Everyday Enticements 000

From Fantasy Island to the Gossip Graveyard

NUDGE 3: Reconsider Holiness

4. Men at the Cross 000

Our Research Reveals Struggles Men Face

NUDGE 4: Change Your Brain

5. Women at the Cross 000Our Research Reveals Struggles Women Face

NUDGE 5: Interrupt Your Heart



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10 Contents

6. Kellys Story: Addiction and Grace 000

When Alcohol Robs a Family

NUDGE 6: Detach Attachments

7. Michaels Story: Worried to Death 000

How Anxiety and Fear Can Be Stumbling Blocks

NUDGE 7: Surrender Control

8. Marks Story: Coming Clean With a Secret War 000

How Hes Turning From Sexual Sin

NUDGE 8: Shake the Shame

9. Danielles Story: Am I Struggling, or Am I Just

Plain Defeated? 000

Releasing the Past and Embracing the Future

NUDGE 9: Fall in Love Again

10. Unmasking the REAL Me 000

Why Most o Us Are Araid to Get Help . . .and How We Can Change That Too

NUDGE 10: Rethink Church

Ening Pint: Giving Gace Anthe Chance 000

Appenix: Calvin, Luthe, an Aminius 0000

Three Protestant Views About Sin and Salvation

Wksheet 1: My Spiitual Weakness Chat 000

Wksheet 2: My Spiitual Inteuptins Chat 000

Cntibuts 000

Ntes 000



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11

Starting Point

Immobilized and Neutralized

This is goodbye, said Jesus. . . .Im going

home. My Father in heaven is waiting or me.Dont go just yet, said James. Stay awhile.

We can get something to eat, build a fire, have

good talks, sai Nathaniel Bathlmew.

Like old times, sai Pete.

No more old times, sai Jesus. There are

only new times rom now on. . . .1

Impossible! I think as I cling t a steep ck ace. Howd I ever get

talked into this? Id rather be sitting in a warm cabin . . . even just

by a warm campfirewhere its sae. NOT risking lie and limb

on a fity-oot clif. This is absolutely INSANE.

I (Michael) am on a ten-day backpacking trip in Caliornias

Ansel Adams Wilderness with a bunch o guy riends. Were under-ging a buil cnfience an cnque yu ea quest sts.

Tays challenge: Scale a slick canyn wall.



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12 Starting Point

I slie my ight han acss a bule an eel a tiny cevice. I

gip it with my fingetips an push with my legs.

As I inch my way upand begin to trust the saety harness

around my waistit isnt long beore I discover that this climb isntall that cazy ate all. The nly tuly scay pat is weaing a blin-

l. Thats ight, a bananna cves my eyes. I cant see a thing!

Excellent, Mikeyoure doing great! yells a voice rom below.

Its my riend Tom. Hes my climbing partner and, literally, my

eyes uing this execise.

Listen to my voice, he calls. Ill get you to the top. Trust me.

I stetch t each an ig my finges int anthe cevice.

Thats it! Tom shouts. Now push with your legs again. Only

anthe thee eet an yue thee!

Im way out o my comort zone. In act, Ive been living on

the edge all week, pushing my body and acing challenge ater

challenge. The pint is t take what I lean in the wileness an

apply it to my lie back homeespecially to my aith. I have toadmit it: Ive gotten way too comortable . . . preerring my old

ways, requently i not constantly going with what I know, regularly

resisting anything new. And when it comes to struggles and tempta-

tins, t ten Im fining mysel immbilize an neutalize.

Now suddenly, conusion. I cant hear Toms voice. Some o

the the guys ae attempting t guie me, each in a ifeent way.

G t the let! smene yells.

Nmve t yu ight.

Push hae!

Tm cmes t the escue: Quiet. Ate a ew mments si-

lence, I hea his vice again. Listen t me. Reach a hanhl

abve yu hea, push with yu legs, an yull be at the tp.

His instructions are perect. And beore I can think about itagain, Ive eache my estinatin. Victory! I hea applause m

the membes my gup.



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I pull f the bananna, eeling cnfient, an lk wn.

Should have stuck with the blindold!

Back at hme within the saety the u walls u amily

m, I sit by a fie, nibble n a snack, an elive my ecent mun-

taintop experiences. While I preer the comorts and routine o

aily living, it ccus t me that I aely have elt me alive than

when I ound mysel dangling rom a rock ace. God definitely

ha my attentin, an my tust.Am I too distracted, Lord? I pay. Is that why I struggle so? Am

I not really hearing you?

Opening a bk, I begin t ea.

This One wh walks like a king is name Jesus. They calle Him

the Nazaene the Galilean. He calle Himsel the Sn man.

The common people speak o Him sotly, with deep afection, suchas the shephes knw, wh cay thei little lambs in thei bsms.

The beggas whispe His name in the steets as they pass, an

the chilen may be hea singing abut Him. His name has been

breathed in prayer and whispered at night under the stars. He is

knwn t the isease, the human fltsam an jetsam that shues

in an ut the twns an its hpelessly alng the usty high-

ways human misey.His ame has tickle wn t the steets gtten men, has

seeped into the shadowed reuges o the unremembered women.

It is Jesus Nazaeth.

Any outcast could tell you o Him. There are women whose lives

have been change wh cul tell yu Himbut nt withut

tears. There are silent menwalking strangely as i unaccustomed

t itwh speak Him with lights in thei eyes.

It is Jesus whm they ae cwing t see. They want t lk n

His ace t see the quality His expessin that seems t pmise

Stating Pint



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14 Starting Point

so much to the weary and heavy-laden; that look that seems to ofer

healing o mind and soul and body; orgiveness o sin; another

chancea beginning again.

His look seemed to sing o tomorrowa new tomorrowinwhich thee shul be n me pain, n me sufeing, n pese-

cutin, n cuelty, n hunge, n neglect, n isillusinments,

n bken pmises, n eath. 2

Lord, Ive lived like a prodigal without even realizing it. I want that

light in my eyes again. I want the new, but Im not sure how to find it.

As I pray and read and ponder, Scripture reveals some answers. . . .

God is always at work . . . creating, perecting, regenerating

reclaiming what is His. He knws exactly what I nee an hw t

wk ut the new an esty the l. A believe walks with the

ptectin u L Jesus Chist. Even thugh He calls me t

bear some burdens, some hurts and some trials, He will continue towk in me, giving me a heat like His. This is my highest calling:

Living in espectul ea the One wh spke the univese int

being an wh hls me in the palm His lving han.

Disobedience can result in devastating consequences. I read

abut King Davis lie. Even thugh he was cmpletely given

or his acts o lust, adultery, thet, and murder, God did not remove

the consequences o his sin. What can I learn from this? Maybe

that He wants me t have a seius eveence His instuctins.

An that when I blw it, He wants me t take espnsibility

my actions by turning to Him in repentance. He will drive out

the ea ubt an cnemnatin an give me the cuage t

llw His lea as I eal with the cnsequences.

He stepped down to save me and to bear the punishment for allmy sins. He bught my eem an gives back cmplete give-

ness. This all-powerul God is tender toward me and will never



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15

give me me than I can bea. He will always watch ve me with

a steay eye. He neve blinks. I can tust Him.

When Prodigals Come Home

When he was still a long way of, his ather saw him. His heart

pounding, he ran out, embraced him, and kissed him. The son

started his speech: Father, Ive sinned against God, Ive sinned

bee yu; I nt eseve t be calle yu sn eve again.

But the athe wasnt listening. He was calling t the sevants,Quick. Bing a clean set clthes an ess him. Put the amily

ring on his finger and sandals on his eet. Then get a grain-ed heier

an ast it. Wee ging t east! Wee ging t have a wneul

time! My sn is heegiven up ea an nw alive! Given up

or lost and now ound! And they began to have a wonderul time.3

Michael is a pigal. Each o us is.Gods ways are simply not our ways. Our hearts are restless and

tend to wander; our selfish wills and ill-advised choices end up

usurping His place, leaving us eeling lost, miserable, and deeated.

Some o us have tiptoed back to Him in ear and trembling,

expecting a fim smack an a wagging finge. Weve expecte, an

deserved, the I told you youd mess it up speeches and the Where

in the world have you been? questions.4 But Jesus throws His arms

aun us, assues us that n matte whee we g, Hell neve lse

us, reminds us o the eternal home Hes given us with Him. He

washes us clean. An then He thws a paty n u behal.

All Jesus asks in etun is ne thing: Believe in Him.

By this pint in u lives, weve figue ut that the path hme

isnt easy. (It never has been, never will be.) And believing is

Stating Pint



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16 Starting Point

smetimes ha t. The steps we must take s G can eml-

ish the l an ashin the new ten eel teiying. As He ges

abut His wk, we smetimes eel alne; ten we eel juge by

thse insie and utsie the chuch.And all along the way, temptation nips at our heels. It never

lets up.

Temptatin equently fins a way t eceive us an knck us

f cuse. Bee we knw it, u aith has stppe mving. We

en up paalyzeliteally immbilize, an neutalize by sin.

Just lk aun. Eveyne stuggles with smething.

Mark eels trapped by lust. Alyssa gossips. Blaine overeats.

Marys arrogant. Kellys mom drinks heavily. Randy has mistaken

a geey vice a nble vitue. Theye all believes.

Yet Chistians, the tuth is that meaningul change an eal

tansmatin ae within each. S why aent u lives ifeent?

Why nt we expeience less anxiety, less espai, less age? Why

nt we expeience me jy, me eem, me ulfillment?Cuent eseach by the Cente Bible Engagement inicates

that me than 85 pecent Ameican Chistians escibe them-

selves as deeated by temptation and lie-controlling problems

everything rom sexual addiction and pornography to lying, cheat-

ing, stealing, gossiping, lustulness, greed, and jealousy. As a result,

many have allen int a txic wnwa spial:

(1) They stuggle alne.

(2) They neglect the very things that can help them break ree

paye, Bible engagement, an tue cmmunity.

(3) They give up spiitually.

They orget this reality: God isnt at all shocked by our weaknesses.

G esnt stp lving us when we ail. G neve gives up nany us, nt a mment. His heat beaks when sin causes us

t un rom Him instea to Him.



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C. S. Lewis said it so well: Only those who try to resist tempta-

tion know how strong it is.5 And no one understands temptations

pwe bette than Jesus. On eath, He ace the same enticements

we encounter yet never once yielded to them. And as God, he brokethe gip the hs u sin causes.

OnlyJesus ully knows what temptation is and how we can

overcome it. We can realize lasting change, through Him. He invites

us t a bette liethe vey best liean He extens His lving

han t guie us twa it.

Why Do We Shrink Away From Christs Healing Touch?

Ou inteviews with expets an inay lks alike have yiele

sme clues.

We Excuse Our BehaviorTemptatin aely maches int u lives with annuncements

o its hostile intentions. Instead, it perverts reality and cloaks itsel

as an excusable action, even as a commendable trait. W. Jay Wood,

pess philsphy at Wheatn Cllege, bseves:

Inordinate anger masquerades as righteous indignation, arrogance

as standing up or my rights, lust as healthy romantic ardor. Whenit cmes t temptatin an sin, wee all inveteate spin cts.6

We Ignore the S Word

Saying the word sin in public is like saying bomb on a plane.

Its a loaded word that makes us uncomortable. One persons

peceptin sin may be ifeent m anthes. An we ntwant t sun hash jugmental, s we avi using the tem.

Thats a pblem. Sct McKnight explains:

Stating Pint



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18 Starting Point

A whle geneatin has been nutue n a message that has em-

bace a gacius view G, but has a t ten igne the

zealous holiness o that same Gods love. Were in a dangerous place

today. We need to conront again the message o the Bible about sin.

7

We Misuse Gods Grace

A gwing numbe us have becme apathetic abut sin, is-

interested in holiness. Amy, or instance, says, Im not denying

that I all sht, [but] I just nt see the pint in welling n it.

G gives, an Im ee in Him. Its almst like saying, Gaceallws me t live hweve I please.

That bi esnt fly. Jesus int sacifice himsel an eeat

death so we could go on just as we are; He did it because otherwise

we would have cntinue as bee, an because in that state we

have been separated rom Him orever. The question isnt whether

God still loves us when we sinits why wed want to go on in

slavey when G lai wn His wn lie s we cul be ee. Tpaaphase Leightn F, He lves us exactly as we ae, an He

lves us a t much t want us t stay that way.

Nobody conquers sin on their own. Through the power o Gods

Spirit, though, we can be reed rom its grip. Because o Jesus,

we can change soul-robbing behaviors and find relie rom the

entanglements and traps that so many times, or so long, have

snae us an pulle us wn.

It all begins when we ace a truth weve tried to avoid and ignore:

Everyone struggles with temptation, and every sin is deadly. Theres

no ofense that doesnt erode us rom the inside outdamaging our

integrity, obscuring our identity, and weakening our relationships.

All sin impedes our intimacy with God and inhibits our ability

to truly love one another.God makes clear the solution: We have certain hope through

aith.8



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Davi gave us a etaste this tuth:

Blesse is the ne whse tansgessin is given,

whse sin is cvee.

Blesse is the man against whm the Lord cunts

n iniquity,

an in whse spiit thee is n eceit.9

When we turn to Jesus and rely on Him, He deals with our

strugglesmoment by moment, hour by hour, day by day. He also

wks m the insie ut, cunteacting the pisnus efects

sinhealing what is hurt, restoring what is lost, strengthening

what is weak.

What Youll Find in Tempted, Tested, True

Im Anie Cle, CEO Back t the Bible. My witing patne is

Michael Rss, an awa-winning junalist an auth thity-

two books. Together, weve seen real and lasting change during

our fity-plus years o combined ministry experience. And as a

behaviist, Ive chate successul spiitual gwth pgams

ellw wune stuggles.

My natinwie eseach with me than 100,000 Chistians

has me the empiical unatin this bk. Well shwyou proven ways to neutralize temptationto evade its grip

and to unplug its power so as to steer clear o its disastrous

cnsequences.

Hees what weve packe int this unique esuce:

Two Books in One(1) A aith-building guide filled with practical solutions

(2) A personal and small-group workbook

Stating Pint



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20 Starting Point

Explore these pages on your own, reerring back to them as

ten as yu wul with any pactical eeence guie. Bette yet,

ea it with iens in any type small gup. All chaptes can

benefit bth men an wmen. Als inclue is a Web-base linkyu can use bth pesnal applicatin an gup Bible stuy.

Real-Life Stories That Chart Lasting Change

Yull be inspie by mving testimnies:

Kellypens up abut the stuggles caing an alchlicpaent.

Michaelguides you through the stumbling blocks o worry

an ea.

Marktalks canily abut his aictin t pngaphy.

Danielleunlcks tuths abut eal lve.

Cheryleveals the ifeence tanspaent cmmunity makes.

Michelleencourages each o us to learn what God really thinks

us.

In u situatin, witing tgethe, using the pesnal pnun

I can get a little cnusing, s t keep things simple, well inicate

who is speaking. (For example, in chapter 1 its Arnie; in chapter 2

its Mike. In sme chaptes its anthe cntibuting stytelle.)The cllective we ees t bth us an yu . . . stuggles wh

want t live me like Jesus evey ay.

A Gentle Nudge

In the words o one Christ-ollower we interviewed: Mix Scrip-

ture with the encouragement o believers who gently nudge butnt juge, an yuve gt a pweul way beaking ee m

Satans attacks.



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21

S think this sectin in each chapte as a nuge m us. The

nuges aent base nly n u pinins but ae awn m e-

tailed, quantifiable research and interviews conducted with ellow

stuggles (expets an inay lks alike).This is also the books roll-up-your-sleeves-and-dive-into-Scrip-

tue aspect, an the iea is this: Gods Word, hidden in my heart,

ortifies me against temptations power.10

The nuges yull fin:

Nudge One: Learn to Be God-CenteredNudge Two: Pinpoint Your Weaknesses

Nudge Three: Reconsider Holiness

Nudge Four: Change Your Brain

Nudge Five: Interrupt Your Heart

Nudge Six: Detach Attachments

Nudge Seven: Surrender Control

Nudge Eight: Shake the Shame

Nudge Nine: Fall in Love Again

Nudge Ten: Rethink Church

Hees hw each enty is ivie:

TEMPTEDIdentifying Soul-Robbing Traps

Fist, we lk inwa an evaluate u stuggles. Amitting

our temptations and bringing them beore God is the first step

toward overcoming them and charting a path toward growth.

TESTEDLearning How to Break Free

Next, we highlight what wks the believes. Ou cn-clusins abut why we stuggle, an what helps us t beak

ee, ae awn m yeas eseach.11

Stating Pint



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22 Starting Point

TRUECharting a Path Toward Lasting Change

Finally, we help you customize a realistic change plan you can

apply t yu lie. Gune in Gs W, it will challenge

yu t engage, eflect n, an live it ut pactically, ay by ay.

A Nationwide Research Study

My team and I (Arnie) at the Center or Bible Engagement

began stuying the spiitual lives Chist-llwes t answe a

deceptively simple question: Why do so many of us own Bibles yet

so ew o us read them? It sn became clea that the lack Bibleengagement was not because we nt see Gs W as imp-

tant, nt believe it, nt unestan it. Rathe, peple say

time and again that they want to hear rom God through His Word

but are simply too busy. This, in turn, led us to consider how

temptation could be holding people back rom growing spiritually.

In 2008, we launche u fist maj stuy temptatin. We

iscusse many finings m that initial stuy in u fist bk,

Unstuck. Since that time, weve cmplete suveys n temptatin

an spiitual gwth with me than 100,000 peple. Ou patici-

pants ae a ivese gup in evey sense the wanging in

age rom thirteen to over seventy, representing every state in the

U.S., in aitin t twenty the cunties.

Thugh these suveys, weve leane that . . .

the temptation to do or have something you know you

shulnt is univesal amng humans.

on an average day, most people encounter three to five

temptatins.

men typically expeience me temptatins than wmen.

temptations change over time. When were young, physicallyoriented temptations have the most pull; later in lie, struggles

with pie an juging thes becme me pminent.



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The world breaks everyone, and afterward,

many are strong at the broken places.

ERNEST HEMMINGWAY

An Opportunity to Engage the Bible

Once again, we can be aically bette (tuly stengthene an

enewe) i we allw G t speak t us thugh His W. Bible

engagement is the key. An as we seek t live ut these ws that

are taking root and then blooming vitally in us, God shows us howt impact the wl Himhelping thes, lving the unlvely,

eaching ut t the neey.

Bible engagement bils wn t thee simple acets:

(1) Stp simply reading the Bible, an stat engaging it. Its es-

sential that we cnsistently receive, reflect on, an respond

to Gs W.

(2) Pay close attention to requency. Weve ound, repeatedly:

Engaging Sciptue u me times pe week makes the

biggest ifeence.

(3) Consider what the Bible is: our personal connection with

G. Its hw we hea m an have a tw-way cnvesa-

tin with u Ceat.

In order to grow, a relationship needs consistent connection.

We draw closer to our loved ones as we spend time with them.

Its the same way with Chist. Engaging the Bible an heaing the

Lords voice through Scripture must be experienced personally

an egulaly.

The Bible has a supernatural component no one can explain.

F me, the me I engage the Sciptuesan espn t whatG saysthe me my lie is mle int what He esigne me

to be. And even though I can learn a lot through Bible reading,

Stating Pint



23/38

24 Starting Point

thees smething n a elatinal plane thats even me exciting

and more transormational. Gods Word gets past my head, touches

my heat, an evives my sul. Mst all, it enews my min an

begins t epuce Gs natue an chaacte in my lie.(Yu can lean me abut Bible engagement in u fist bk:

Unstuck: Your Life. Gods Design. Real Change. [see www.unstuck.

gTanem.cm].)

Tempted, Tested, True Is Online

We also introducegoTandema website that

can help you and your church grow. Pop over

anytime for video clips, spiritual growth assess-

ments, and additional faith-building resources

(www.tempted.goTandem.com).



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1From the Garden

to the Desert . . . andOn to the Cross

Our Age-Old Battle With a Deadly Menace

Religin is peple wh ae aai theyll g

t hell. Spiituality is peple wh have been

thee.1

God speaks. Darkness hides. A soup o nothingness suddenly burstswith light an cl an wamth.

God createswate, ai, sky, eath. An living beings!

Creatures spring orth in every size and shape, splashing through

the seas and thundering across the plains. Chirping. Flapping.

Swaming. Bleating. Gnawing. Clawing. Digging.

It is g.2

God gives. His essence. His heat. Himsel.



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As He eaches int the gun, ust pus thugh His finges.

But then He begins t m it, mling san an mu int sme-

thing amilia. A t. An am. A ace. His geatest mastepiece.

Let us make human beings in u image,

make them eflecting u natue

S they can be espnsible

the fish in the sea, the bis in the ai, the cattle,

An, yes, Eath itsel,

an evey animal that mves n the ace Eath.3

God animates. Lungs inflate. Hearts beat. Eyes open wide

gazing back int His.

Humans: spiit, flesh, easn, emtin, passin, ceativity, in-

tellect. The finest eflectin G that He cul eam up. His

image. His amily. Aam an Eve.

God blesses. An the fist man an wman ule ve the wl.

Pspe! Repuce! Fill Eath! Take chage!

Be espnsible fish in the sea an bis in the ai,

evey living thing that mves n the ace Eath.4

God rests. The wl is cmplete. His wk is finishe.

It is g, s vey g.5

In the beginning, lie was flawless.

Aam an Eve live in a gaen paaise t wk it an take

cae it.6 It was thei vcatin, thei lies pupse. G spke

intimately with His chilen thee an even walke amng them

in the cl the ay.7

Imagine it: Two perect humans enjoying pristine perection with

thei Make. N ea shame came between them an G. N




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pain, n sufeing, n hate, n egets. Peect hamny. Aam

was one note, Eve the other, and God the thirdwoven together in

an intimate melody none o us has ever come close to recapturing.8

Way ifeent m tay, ight?I (Anie) see bkenness all aun me. In my wn twna ela-

tively auent Nebraska communitychildren and homeless amilies

g hungy. Sme hule nea busy intesectins, clutching tattee

signs: Need Food. Unemployed Vet. Help My Kids. Teens

wh lk like steetwalkes an gang-banges file int u schls.

I flip on the news and am assaulted by a barrage o nonstop

misery: Rising gas prices, crashing markets; earthquakes along the

Pacific Rim, tornadoes in the Midwest. Terrorists mastermind

another bombing . . . Scandal on Capitol Hill . . . A deadly

shting inside a mega-chuch . . .

Mans inhumanity t man. Factue amilies. Bken heats.

Lying. Cheating. Stealing. Rage. Envy. Gssip. Gee. Pie.

Sin.Everywhere. All around us and in usyou, me . . . our children.

No one is immune. Yet on most days we manage to stay pretty

numb t it all. We igne u ailues an wnplay u mal

meltdowns, writes Steven James. We fill our lives with rantic

istactins s we can avi nticing the splinte guilt embe-

e s eeply in u suls.9

The questin is, why we have a splinte in u suls?

Genesis 3 tells us what happened in the garden: The serpent

shows up, a lie about God is whispered, a soul-robbing choice is

made, orbidden ruit is tasted, and . . . BAM! Humans are tossed

into the thorns o a allen world.

Adam and Eve were made in the image o God. An image repre-

sents someone or something; on Earth, they represented the Lord.They had every advantage: a perect home, a perect purpose, a

peect elatinship.

Fm the Gaen t the Deset . . . an On t the Css



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So why did they end up immobilized by temptation and neu-

talize by sin? Why i a peect beginning egeneate int the

chas we expeience nw?

Tw easns.

Were Free to Choose

G int ceate us t be autmatns. Instea, the One wh ut-

tered neutrons into existence gave His greatest masterpieces the

reedom to dream, to use their imaginations, and to think on theirwn. They wee ee t wk with thei hans an t ceate. They

wee ee t make thei wn ecisins an t gven the wl n

His behal. But in ing s, the L expse himsel t the pain

o jilted love.10 Adam and Eve could choose to love God and to

becme even cleae eflectins Him . . . they cul chse

t tun thei backs n Him an reject Him altgethe.

G cul have existe all etenity withut pain, but in-

stea He iske anguish in e t have smene utsie himsel

t lve;smene wh might eely lve Him back.11 An this is the

genius His ceatin.

Karen C. Hinckley, o Yale University, explains it this way in

The Story o Stories: The Bible in Narrative Form:

He [God] had previously made creatures who were pure spirit:

They could reason, make choices, and perceive qualities in God

like His majesty. Hly, hly, hly! they cie as they wshipe

Him unceasingly or His greatness and perection. But His love

was beyn thei capacity t gasp. A being neee eelingseven

passionto understand what it would mean to ofer onesel to

anthe vulneably an t shaewell, t shae lve. G was a

passionate, sel-giving Being, and His angels were utterly unable

to appreciate this side o Him. On the other side, animals had




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eelings but cul nt easn an make mal chices; thei lve

lacke cnsciusness an matuity. Man was Gs ingenius hy-

bispiit an sul, easn an passin, the finest eflectin

Himsel that G cul puce.12

God put Adam and Eve in charge o the garden to practice their

godlike qualities o creativity and authority. So they could practice

thei ability t make mal chices, he gave them ne estictin:

Dnt eat m the Tee--Knwlege--G-an-Evil.13

But then an invae m utsie the physical univese, a spiit

wh camuflage himsel as a snake, tempte Eve: G knws

that when yu eat m it yu eyes will be pene, an yu will

be like G, knwing g an evil.14 In the ws, He doesnt

really love you. He wants to keep you ignorant, under His thumb,

abiding by an endless list o unreasonable rules. Youre more an

amusing pet than a person. Rebellion is your only choice.

Adam and Eve had no idea that the imposter had been the high-est Gs angelic sevants until he himsel ebelle. Accing

to tradition, his name had been Lucier (lightbearer) but became

Satan (the adversary) and Abaddon (the destroyer). He decided

he int want t spen etenity wshiping his Ceat; he cn-

siee that t be beneath him. S he eclae his inepenence

an set up a ival kingm.15

The wily sepent knew hw t sway the mins the wls

first couple. Does God really know whats best for you? Could you

be happier looking out or yourselves instead o always listening

to Him?

The scent an cl the bien uit entice thei senses,

and suddenly everything they knew about the LordHis desire

or them, His loving care, His wisdom and gentlenessall wasgtten. At that mment, tuth was tae lies. As they gave

in to temptation and were dragged into revolt, a deadly menace




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was ee. This lethal e nw wul taunt an ty with humans

until the en time.

We Ache for Control

Deep in our heart o hearts, we all want to call the shots or

uselves.

Im going to live my life my waycarve out my place in this

world, find my meaning, and get what satisfies me. Smetimes we

even mouth the lies Satan whispered in the garden: Im just not readyto ully trust God. I mean, how can I be sure He really cares about

me and my problems? I He does, then where is He? Why cant I

hear Him? Maybe I really would be happier doing things my way.

Yet our preoccupation with meand not with Godis exactly

what went wrong in the garden. Adam and Eve rejected Gods one

single cmman, an all human histy change. They bughtthe lie m Satan: They became cnvince that being in chage

thei wn sul was best.

The pblem with this stategy is that we humans ten t make

bad choices. Part o the reason is that we dont see the entire picture,

the cmplete sty. But anthe easn is that, quite simply, wee

selfish. Since the all, sel-centeenessnt G-centeeness

has becme u efining chaacteistic.

Gvening the csms n Gs behal was an is nt enugh

or humanity, says Scot McKnight. Humans ache to rule the

csms. They want t be G. The ache t be G an act as i

we ae G is what sin is all abut.16

Even thugh thee is plenty evience wn thugh the ages

that humankins view g an evil is flawe, we still want tbe in cntl. Isnt this hw mst us live u lives? Its appeal is

t u base instincts.




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Nonetheless, try as we might, yearn as we do, we are not the

maste u ate the captain u sul. Like it nt, sin

leas us wn nly ealy paths, an all kins them:

We allow our will to usurp the power o God.

We redefine sin and morality: There is a way that appears

to be right, but in the end it leads to death.17

We base our significance (and the status o others) on fleet-

ing markers like strength, beauty, intelligence, achievements,

wealth.

We seek happiness anywhere but the Source: alcohol and

other drugs, obsessions with our own pleasures and pastimes

(sports and gambling or getaways and shopping), houses,

pets, possessions.

We seek love anywhere but the Source: We rely on our rela-

tionships with other people, we give in to lust, we misuse

sensuality and sex. We seek meaning anywhere but the Source: careers, religious

practices, power.

Think abut a typical ay. Much it gets spent tying t make

lie wk without G in the cente. Yet we still expect Him t c-

peateelating t us n ourtems, evlving aun ourplans,

slving pblems s we can live hw we want t live. An while

we may think our lives are humming along just fine, weve been

deceived. Gradually, choice by choice, a chasm between us and

G is gwing wie an eepe.

Humming along fine? Disconnecting rom the Source is

isastus.Simply put, separation rom the Lord is the root cause o every-

thing that has gone wrong (and will go wrong) in our lives. Its




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the cause that splinte s eeply embee in u suls, which

bings us back t the questin Why?

Why is it s easy t listen t the whispeings a snake an s hat hea the vice the Lamb? Why ae we awn s natually t

illusion and so slow to pursue the truth? I think its because ever since

Adam and Eves atal choice, the jargon o temptation has been our

natural tongue and the dialect o love has been a oreign language.18

And So We Wander Through the Desert . . .

One morning during devotions, I opened my Bible to Leviticus.

Should I read this book? I asked mysel. Does anything in here

actually apply to my lie?

Supisinglyyes.

Even though you and Ialong with everyone elseyearn or

the garden, our sin has let us in a hostile wasteland. Cleansingthe earth with a flood was a shocking way to get our attention:

Humankins inne cuptin must be estye; hliness must

be live.19 Yet the Ten Cmmanments G lai wn20 wee (an

are) continually broken, and His once reshly scrubbed creation

again became staine, pllute by the same flaws that ha eane

Lucier a place in hell: rage, envy, gluttony, sloth, pride, lust, greed.

Leviticus shws us that the L isnt giving up n humankin.

G enthne himsel ight in thei mistcnfine behin

our layers o curtains and a screened courtyard. Without the barri-

es, His hly pesence wul have isintegate anyne wh came

nea Him. Sin an hliness ae like gasline an fiethey simply

cannt cme in cntact with each the.

He lnge t wane amng His chilen as He ha in Een,t lk int thei eyes, ace-t-ace again. He wante them t be

hly with Himset apat m the wl e that the Sepents




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influence had perverted. So once more He had to use shocking

meths t teach sme shcking tuths.

Seemingly endless blood sacrifices had to be brought to the Lord

evey ay. T many cntempay eas, this suns like senselesswaste an cuelty, but G equie it because the peple ha t

lean: Evil costs dearly.

Wheneve smene fee an animal, he lai his hans n it t

ientiy himsel with it. As he watche it butchee an bune,

he knew that G was accepting its eath in his place.21

Imagine being a priest. Youd spend your day slaughtering bulls

an gats an lambs, emving hies, sepaating gans an at,

cutting meat int pieces. Yu be winging ves necks an tea-

ing of doves wings, and youd be constantly sprinkling blood

aun n altas an tes an ealbes.

Imagine the stenchall that blood, the flies, the mess. And

imagine, mst all, that it neve stps. As a piest finishes with

one bull, some guy comes up with another and says, Can youplease hanle El T hee? I int even ealize I was sinning, but

I just messe up.22

Imagine the misery. The peple wul keep n sinning, an the

piests wul keep n slicing up wam flesh.

Why this nging massace? What i a humans pesnal lie

have t with a blameless animal? Everything. Peple cul nt

be released rom sins guilt without payment or sins costre-

membe, hliness an unhliness, puity an impuity, cannt

cexist. The nly way they cul be abslve was by the sacifice

smene smething inncent the fense.

As many lessons as the sacrificial system taught, it was not a

eteent t sinthe Ol Testament is plain as ay n this. The

peple went n sinning, an the piests went n butcheing.23

Humans have a way o making routine that which should be

statling. Gs hliness emans that a pice be pai teasn;




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that price is death, separation rom Him. But He knows that, having

allen, His people are incapable o living perectly. For a time, or pay-

ment in blood, He accepted an animal to substitute or the human.24

Yet just a time. That system was nt Gs ultimate plan,an it wul emain in place nly until the time was ight God

himselt becme the nce--all sacifice sin.

The Way of the Cross

The hour had come. God the Son was about to be slain beorethe eyes the wl, but fist the slies ecie t have sme

un with Him.25

Jesus was shredded with a whip that had multiple leather strips,

each ame at the en with shap metal bne. Then, ate His

captors had woven a crown rom a bush (each thorn about an

inch lng an shap as a neele), ne jamme it wn nt His

hea. Anthe hung a puple be n His mutilate by, an the

cw jeee Him.

Some spat on Jesus. The soldiers made a game o punching Him

in the ace again an again an again as they emane that He

pphesy by telling them wh, in tun, ha stuck Him.

Once Jesus was led to The place o the skull,26 those who

gathee at the css behel hate at its wst an lve at its best.

Peple s hate that they kille Gs Sn; G s lve that He

gave peple lie. 27

In spikes wee iven cmpletely thugh each His hans

an eet. He was stippe nake an aise high int the ai all

t see an scn as He hung hus in the Mile Easten sun.

Jesus eventually became so exhausted that no matter how hard

He tie, He cul nt hl His by up by His piece eet. Hebegan t hang m His tn hans, His weight gaually pulling

apat His ams an shules.




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He struggled to keep shiting back to His eet, but exhaus-

tin gaually vetk Him until, finally, His ams be all His

weight. Thus His by began t cave in n itsel as He culnt

gasp enugh ai int His lungs.Thee, in the blisteing heatbattee beyn cmpehensin

and nearly beyond recognition, with spikes through His limbs and

His bones being pulled rom their socketsJesus slowly sufocated

t eath. What ha been etl hunes yeas ealie came

t pass:

He was piece u tansgessins,

he was cushe u iniquities;

the punishment that bught us peace was n him,

an by his wuns we ae heale.

We all, like sheep, have gne astay,

each us has tune t u wn way;

an the L has lai n him

the iniquity us all.28

Onlookers witnessed even more than the ulfillment o prophecy.

Natue itsel began t withe an cy ut at what we wee ing

t u Make.

From noon to three, the whole earth was dark. Around midat-

ernoon Jesus groaned out o the depths, crying loudly, Eli, Eli,lama sabachthani? which means, My God, my God, why have

yu abanne me?

Sme bystanes wh hea him sai, Hes calling Elijah.

One them an an gt a spnge sake in su wine an lite

it n a stick s he cul ink. The thes jke, Dnt be in such

a huy. Lets see i Elijah cmes an saves him.

But Jesus, again cying ut luly, beathe his last.

At that mment, the Temple cutain was ippe in tw, tp t

bttm. Thee was an eathquake, an cks wee split in pieces.




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Whats me, tmbs wee pene up, an many bies believ-

ers asleep in their graves were raised. (Ater Jesus resurrection,

they let the tmbs, entee the hly city, an appeae t many.)

The captain o the guard and those with him, when they saw theearthquake and everything else that was happening, were scared to

eath. They sai, This has t be the Sn G!29

That was tue. An s was estye the cutain that set apat

the holy rom the proane, the barrier between the created and

the Ceat. Jesus payment u sins nw mae it pssible

anyne t be mae pue enugh t stan in Gs pesence.The Make the wl ha pai the wls efiant is-

obedience. The sacrifice, the substitution or our punishment, was

complete. All who have believed werearereed rom the power

the ealiest menace.

Satan ha lst. N matte hw many battles wul be wage

m then t the en, the warwith sin was over.Now it was simply up to each individual to step orward and

claim the victory that already had been entirely, eternally achieved.

Nw its time t fight back.

Jesus sai,

This is war, and there is no neutral ground. If youre not on my

side, youre the enemy; i youre not helping, youre making thingsworse.30

My Story, YourStory . . .

Thees an nging tug--wa in evey heat.

As much as we long to be in control, we also yearn to get hometo our true home, with Jesus; to the everlasting garden where well

walk with Him in the cl the ay31 an be like him, we




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shall see him as he is.32 Theell be n ea, n shame, n pain, n

sufeing, n hate, an n egets. Theell be peect hamny:

G an uswven tgethe in flawlessly intimate mely.

Its up to us to choose Him.Its up to us to release control and to surrender that ache to Him.

As Gs human ceatins, wee ee t llw a lie-path that

will lea us int His etenal kingm (which pmises t be un-

imaginably me wnus than Een) . . . orwe can etemine

t emain in the thns. Remembe: On this battlefiel, thee isnt

a n-mans lan.

We can choose Gods life and see manifested

in us the fruits of the Spirit: love, joy,

peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness,

faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

OR

We can choose our own way and yield to the

acts of the sinful nature, allowing ourselves to

degenerate with the cravings of the flesh: sexual

immorality, impurity and debauchery, idolatry

and witchcraft, hatred, discord, jealousy, fits

of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions,

envy, drunkenness, orgies, and the like.33

Duing my ak mments, when I fin mysel entangle with

temptatin an agge away by sin, Ive caught mysel asking i

Ill eve get thee.

Ive mae sme umb chices uing my six ecaes n planetEath. (An nt just lng ag, eithe.) Ive allwe that ache in

my wn sul t push Gs authity an pwe ight ut my




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lie. Thankully, thugh, the ache that kncks me f cuse m

time to time also ends up dropping me to my knees in humble

epentance.

Ive mae sme g chices t.I committed my lie to Jesus Christ ourteen years ago, and every

ay since Ive given that same heat t my beautiul wie, Cha. I

aise u ne--a-kin kis. I eicate mysel t suppting

and building up the church. (Researching and writing this book

als alls int the g categy!)

Regardless, the spiritual tug-o-war doesnt let up, and the

apstle Pauls anguish equently becmes mine:

I nt unestan my wn actins. F I nt what I want,

but I do the very thing I hate. . . . I have the desire to do what is

ight, but nt the ability t cay it ut. F I nt the g

I want, but the evil I nt want is what I keep n ing. Nw i

I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that

wells within me.34

I yue eeling alne in yu win-lse battle with temptatin,

listen clealy: D nt allw yusel t all victim t the enemys

isolate and destroy strategy. He wants you to eel as i youre

the exceptina hpeless spiitual lse. The tuth is yue nt

alone. Every human soul is a battleground: Surely I was sinulat birth, sinul rom the time my mother conceived me.35 And

thee, in each us, a wa between g an evil is ught evey

secn evey ay.

Thugh Chist, we all can be spiitual winnes as well.

Hee ae a ew things us t get thugh u heas:

We are the prodigal son.We are Adam and Eve.

We are not alone.




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G lavishe upn the fist humans eveything they neee

evey avantage t succee. He gave them the tls t withstan

temptatin an t stay utsie sins gip.

Hes still doing this today. The Bible proves it, and researchcnfims it.

Nw, lets ll up u sleeves an get pactical! Whethe yue

male emale, yung l, ich p, weve shwn yu tw

univesal tuths:

1. We all stuggle with temptatin an sin.

2. Jesus Christ can ree us rom bondage to soul-robbingchices.

In the llwing sectin (an the simila sectin in each subse-

quent chapte), let us nuge yu twa eal change, twa tue

transormation! Weve laid out a proven path to help you engage the

Bible and hear Gods personal message to you, to learn approaches

t spiitual gwth that ae helping the believes (base n cu-

ent eseach finings), an t chat a ealistic plan navigating

any temptatin tap yull encunte.


tempted, tested, true

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