SaUKta Sukta

Uparama: Getting Back to Oneselfby Puyja Swamiji

What is uparati, or as the author of the Tattvabodha calls it, uparama? He answers, svadharma-anunusthanameva. This is a very interesting meaning. Uparama is getting back to yourself. There is a tendency to omit what I have to do, and do what I need not do, do something else. This is the tendency that everybody has. A withdrawal from that, and doing what is to be done is uparama, svadharma- anuñöhänam eva. Svadharma: sva means one’s own; dharma, here, is what is to be done. What is to be done is to be done. We can’t say, “I don’t feel like doing it,” and not do it. This is a certain abuse of freedom. Even though you don’t feel like doing it, sometimes it has to be done. So what is to be done, you do, even though you don’t feel like doing it, and what is not to be done, even if you feel like doing it, you don’t. That is what he calls uparama.

Uparama is also translated as sannyasa, renunciation—taking to a life of renunciation for a dedicated pursuit. In fact, this is a more suitable meaning for all of us. But here, he says that it is svadharma-anunusthanam, whatever is your dharma, whatever is to be done at a given place and in a given situation, that you do, whether you like it or not. That is how we gain a certain mastery over our own likes and dislikes. Otherwise they dictate our behavior all the time, and that is a meaningless life, really speaking. As long as these likes and dislikes conform to dharma, they are fine. If what is to be done conforms to dharma and you like it, and it is good for you, and you do it,

Inside this IssueUparama by Pujya SwamijiVaktapas by Sadhviji

Ashram News

Report on the Oregon Talks Family Vedanta RetreatNew Year Celebration

Reflections

Poem for Divine Mother Meeting Swamiji in DCAn EncounterInterfaith Prayer MeetingOn ChantingDiscovering Vedanta

Regular FeaturesSatsang with SadhvijSadhvijiʼs Online Classes and Travel Schedule

Arsha Vijnana Gurukulam

in fact, you will be spontaneous. It is something like a doctor telling you that every day you must eat an apple, and you saying, “Oh, that’s wonderful, I love apples.” When you love apples and somebody advises you to eat an apple daily, you can enjoy that; there is no conflict. But then, if they say that you have to take this bitter gourd juice every day, then you have to take it, even though you don’t like it—and I don’t think anybody will ever like it. Certain things you can learn to like after some time, like blue cheese, I suppose. But I don’t think anybody will learn to like bitter gourd juice. Still, you take it. Why? It has to be taken. And so, what we like is not going to be what is to be done every time, and what we don’t like is not what is not to be done every time. No, what we don’t like sometimes is to be done, and what we like is not to be done. And therefore, what shall we do? If you go by what you like and don’t like, you’ll become a derelict, so what is to be done you do, and what is not to be done, you avoid. This becomes uparama. It avoids conflicts, and it gives you a sense of satisfaction, also, a sense of success about yourself as a person, because you can deny yourself something you want. That is an amazing thing. That makes you feel

good, and therefore, you have a good day. It is a very common thing in America to say, “Have a good day.” But what is a good day, I would like to know? What do you mean by that “Have a good day”? Each one has his own idea of a good day. Someone thinks that if you attend a music concert in the evening it is a good day. If a pick-pocket says, “Have a good day,” what does that mean? So when you say, “Have a good day,” what do you mean? I will say that a good day is a day at then end of which, when you go to bed, you feel good. Why? Because you were able to avoid certain things which you wanted to do, but were not to be done, and you could do the things that were to be done, even though you didn’t want to—like Sanskrit homework. Who wants to do this? “I never knew that I was in for this. I thought I would listen to the swami and get some knowledge of atman, etc., but what is this?” So, you have a good day when you do your homework. Then you feel good about having done it. Really, after you reorganize your inner life and have that sense of being in charge of your life. That is uparama. Then there is so much you can do, really. Once you are in charge of your own life, you can

help others too. Doing it you feel good, especially when you write Sanskrit and it is legible, and somebody is able to read it, and remarks, “This is correct.” That makes you feel good. The beauty is that when you avoid something that you have to avoid, even though you feel like doing it, that really makes you feel good. That capacity makes you feel good, because you feel that you are the master. You have reorganized your inner life and have that sense of being in charge of your life. ‘I am in charge’ is very good. So that is uparama, being in charge of your life. Then there is so much you can do, really. Once you are in charge, you can help others too. Otherwise, others have to take care of you. When you are in charge you can help others, and you are in charge when you are able to do what is to be done.

“Tat Tvam Asi” A Poem by Mary Rothbart

The dancers and the danceThe singers and the song

The teacher and the taughtThe thinker and the thoughtThe cooks and the cookedThe roosters and the roostThe farmers and the farmThe sentience that says

"I am; I am that; I am all."

New Year’s AddressThis is the beginning of a new year. We welcome it into our lives as it brings with it a promise of new possibilities. With the arrival of every year, there is a sense of anticipation, and the hope of something new. Beginnings are, therefore, important, because we have a chance to start afresh.

In the western tradition, it is customary to make resolutions at the beginning of the year. Generally, one may resolve to eat healthier, to lose weight, to exercise regularly. Less frequently, one may make the commitment to have more patience, or study Vedanta and meditation. Oftentimes, we find that these resolutions do not last past the first month. The resolutions become difficult to keep, often because they arise out of a sense of incompleteness. The resolution is made in the first place because one is not happy with oneself –the basic premise is that something needs to be “fixed up” within oneself so that one can “become” acceptable to oneself. As a result, such resolutions arising out of self-judgment are squashed by the very self-judgment that one desires to overcome. This is an inevitable setup for failure.

Self-criticism manifests as a striving for perfectionism. One judges oneself constantly, becoming hypercritical of oneself and others. One constantly strives never to make a mistake by garnering the most appropriate response to all situations, and performing the all actions accurately. Consequently, even as they arise, one’s creative impulses are stifled. This in turn curtails how one relates and responds to life, increasing the sense of alienation from the whole. How can we welcome a new beginning with an attitude that is unable to rejoice in anything new, to be enthusiastic and hopeful about setting and accomplishing goals? Chronic self-criticism arises out of self-ignorance, out of not knowing that the self is Isvara, whole, limitless, and therefore perfect. It is possible to have absolute freedom from self-judgment only by self-knowledge, called brahmavidya or Vedanta. As one exposes oneself to the teaching and gains greater clarity about the truth of oneself, the self-judgment totally wears away. The dissemination of this knowledge for seekers is the primary purpose of the Gurukulam, which makes this teaching available through retreats, courses, and online classes.

In the everyday, one can gain a relative freedom from perfectionism through an attitudinal shift in one’s values, and consciously lived practices that affirm the vision of the Upanishads and the Bhagavad Gita. In this vision, all that is here, known and unknown, is Isvara alone, who manifests as the jagat –the cosmic laws, the five elements, and everything that is composed of the five elements, including one’s body-mind-sense complex. Understanding Isvara as the order helps gain a sense of acceptance of what is. What is, is Isvara, and therefore, one can practice sensing the presence of Isvara, in all things one cannot control, in everything one is critical of, including oneself.

This means understanding one’s own helplessness --that one is not really in control of anything. We can desire, but when we act to manifest the desires, we find that we are not in control of the results of our actions. Given this fact, the best thing there is to do is cultivate an attitude of equanimity and to greet the results of the actions –one is not overly elated when things go according to one’s

desires, and one is not overly dejected when the results of the actions do not match one’s expectations and efforts. In not getting what we want, we become wiser and gain the infrastructure to discover the devotee by becoming more prayerful.

Prayer is the most pragmatic response to situations over which one has no control. Only in prayer is the “free will” really free, because it does not come under the sway of desires. One need not pray; one chooses to pray. Prayer is an action, and like every action, it produces a visible and invisible result. The visible result of prayer is the discernible sense relief arising from the conviction that one has done all that one can do. Prayer also bestows peace of mind –when the one who considers him/herself to be limited, surrenders to the altar that represents the limitless, there is absorption. The limited loses itself as it were in the limitless. Surrendered to the limitless, the “limited one” is no more limited. The invisible result of prayer is punya, grace, which inoculates one against the onslaught of the invisible durita, results of past actions that constantly unfold throughout one’s life, and manifest as obstacles --external and internal—hijacking one’s goals, along with hope of achieving them. We need to pile up the punya –the earned grace, which has the power to neutralize difficulties-- and we also need to act, to do our best, in devotion and surrender.

Discovering the devotee in oneself is a process. It is acquired through discernment and emotional maturity. One discovers devotion by being devoted through prayer. There is no other way around it. Regulating one’s response to life-situations, and thereby one’s likes and dislikes, is the key to discovering the devotee –one’s core identity. Insulated by the nascent connection to Isvara, the whole, the devotee gains the requisite grace and courage to tackle life’s challenges and fulfill one’s roles to the fullest. May 2010 be year of prayer and devotion, may it be filled with abundance, knowledge and peace for all.

Vedanta Campby Suditi Shyamsunder

I went to a camp in NovemberIt was an event to remember

I had two nice teachersWho read stories and taught us prayers

Making Ganeshas was excitingMine looked quite amazing

We played Volley ballThe net was really tall

We played with bubblesAnd made many friends.

Maryland FamilyVedanta Retreat 2009

Maryland Vedanta RetreatVedanta in Daily Life

by Ed AkehurstIn November, just before Thanksgiving, Sadhviji blessed us with her presence at a weekend retreat in Maryland. It was held at a lodge and was attended by over 50 people.

We had classes for the children, a Yoga class and plenty of great food and friendship, but the highlight of the retreat was Sadhviji’s discourses. The topic discussed throughout the weekend was “Vedanta in Daily Life.” While we had the opportunity to get away from the outside world and our hectic day-to-day lives for a few days, we learned things to take back into the world with us. Sadhviji reminded us that the teachings of the Vedas may be many thousands of years old, but they are no less valid today than the day they were first revealed. By pointing out that we are identifying with what is not the self (anatma), Sadhviji revealed that the misidentification causes subjectivity and sorrow. Sadhviji discussed objectivity, which is seeing things as they are, rather than as colored

by our raga-dvesas. Objectivity can be cultivated. We learned that the less subjectivity we have, the more appreciation we have of Isvara. The removal of subjectivity is only taught in a spiritual setting. We spent the weekend studying ways to acquire the ability to increase our objectivity and decrease our subjectivity. The teachings that are given in the Bhagavad Gita and throughout the Upanishads, as unfolded by Sadhviji, allow us to do just that – to increase our objectivity and to have more appreciation of Isvara.

This retreat was more than just a weekend away to relax. It was filled with teachings that were practical and useful not only at a retreat, but also in our daily lives at home and work. We were able to take something away from this retreat that will be with us always.

Reflections of East Coast Retreat by Srimati Vasantha Varadarajan

“Yeh Dil Maange More” (This heart wants more) of the BaltiMORE retreat. In Mid November, we attended the Vedanta retreat held in Jarretsville, MD outside the Baltimore area.

The retreat was definitely a home away from home – the feeling was one of a large family get-together. The location was the most ideal. We rested and rejuvenated the mind and body in the best way possible in the natural slyvan setting. The enchanting environment and invigorating schedule no doubt did wonders for everyone. The meditation sessions helped us overcome the inability to focus.

The basic theme of the retreat was how to apply Vedanta in our daily lives. We had a soul stirring experience in our Guru’s presence. The seekers learned to let go of tension and stress, providing the mind with the much needed rest. We learned to overcome the effects of inevitably stressful situations and make a positive impact on the quality of our lives. The organizers deserve a pat on the back. It was meticulously planned and executed. The food served was totally sattvic and very “home like.” To put it in Sadhviji’s words, “Regardless of whether the people were on time to the lectures or not, each meal was served on the dot.” There were also classes for the children conducted by two very special and wonderful teachers. The yoga sessions by our Seethaji needs a special mention.

I am sure the sadhakas who could not make to this retreat would definitely make special efforts to take advantage of such retreats at least in the future.A big namaste and thanks to our dear Sadhviji. May you “re-treat” us with such retreats at more frequent intervals.

3 Month Vedanta Course in Eugeneby Faith LaCross

The Vedanta course in Eugene with Sadhviji (September-December) has included weekly chanting class, bi-weekly Sanskrit class, Vivekachudamani class three times a week, Bhagavad Gita Home Study group weekly, online classes (Atma Bodha, Bhagavad Gita, Bhaja Govindam) three days a week, Interfaith gatherings, a two week Public lecture series, a visit from an Ayurvedic physician, a mini- retreat in Corvallis, a Thanksgiving Family Retreat and countless festivals, satsangs and opportunities for guru and ashram seva. Students in Eugene have committed to attending these classes and doing seva, while still fulfilling duties in our daily lives. It has been a way of truly living what I have heard. Sadhviji teaches about karma yoga --one does what is to be done in one’s life while always keeping Ishwara in view. That is what I have done. At times, when the resistance seemingly gets the best of me, it has been challenging. Ultimately it has always been

clear that this opportunity to study should be taken to the fullest. The teachings of Vedanta have been beautifully unfolded by Sadhviji nearly every day so that no moment is wasted. The intensive study of the text Vivekachudamani, the Sanskrit classes and the opportunities for Guru/ashram seva are a few of the many highlights. Vivekachudamani is a text that Pujya Swami Dayananda Saraswati has beautifully compiled into 108 select verses that we are studying. It starts with telling one that you are the whole. It then shows the crux of the problem of not knowing fully who you are, identifying with what you are not and not being able to discriminate (viveka) between atma and anatma. It is clear about the need to find a proper teacher and what inner qualifications are needed so one can listen with a calm, clear mind. The vision is then given through a beautiful sifting process of atma (I) and anatma (not I). Anything that can be observed is not atma (the body, breathing, mind, sense of doer-ship, sense of experiencer-ship). The atma, the seer cannot be seen as an object. First the tvam pada vichara (inquiry into the meaning of the word “you”) is done. Then, through the well-known mahavakyas (Upanishad sentences that show the identity between jiva and Ishwara), the tat pada (Isvara) is unfolded. One is shown that the knowledge of identity between the jiva and Isvara, is a cognitive, not an experiential pursuit. This knowledge alone will release one from the notional sense of bondage (samsara). This is where were currently are in the text, as the beautiful unfolding of the words continue. The opportunity to study Sanskrit in person with Sadhviji has been an incredible blessing. So many times in Vedanta classes I have

heard Sadhviji talk about the importance of gaining objectivity and losing the subjectivity. Sanskrit is an opportunity to do this. It brings into the forefront any doubts one has about the ability to learn, memorize and be logical. I have been working on my Sankskrit assignments and realize that it is no longer a task that I dread and now one I treasure. It is an important step in preparing oneself for the knowledge, not just through a deeper understanding of the language, but also through the journey one takes in learning the language.May the knowledge of Sanskrit and Vedanta bestow limitless blessings on the student body in Eugene. May we all continue to thrive and grow. Om tat sat.

Online Vedanta Classesby Sri V N Ramakrishnan

Bhagavan Sri Krishna says in the 7th Chapter of the Bhagavad Gita, “among thousands of people a rare one endeavors for moksa. Even of these rare seekers, one perchance knows Me in reality.” Moksa is gained only by Brahma Vidya or self-knowledge -- the subject matter of Vedanta. The message being conveyed is that seekers are rare and teachers of Vedanta are rarer.

What is the proper method of approaching the teacher? Mundakopanishad says, “May one, with sacrificial twigs in hand, reverentially approach a teacher that is well taught (Srotriyam) and committed to Brahman (Brahmanishtham).” The implication is that only someone who represents the Guru-Sishya parampara (tradition) is capable of unfolding this sacred knowledge. Therefore, this knowledge is also known as “Arsha Vidya”-- that which was revealed by the Lord to the Rishis and passed on to us through the unbroken lineage or parampara.Today the technology is helping us make this timeless traditional knowledge available to sadhakas because we are fortunate and blessed to have a Guru like Sadhviji who is not only Brahmavit, but also ‘Computervit’. The best part is she can be approached by just a ‘LOG-in’ (rather than sacrificial logs). We also need not move out of the comfort of our homes or spend any time traveling to another location. What a timeless tradition this is which can adapt to the changing times by offering new means, where you can see, hear and interact with the teacher through the computer. Recordings of sessions are available for repeated listening (recommended) or to catch up on a missed class (not recommended). Online webcast of special events and monthly classes held in Washington DC are a bonus. Serious students can derive the benefit of consistent study of the scriptures through these classes. Online classes have been continuously offered for more than three years during which time sadhakas from different parts of US and the world have studied Sanskrit, Mundakopanishad, Kenopanishad, some chapters of the Bhagavad Gita,and smaller texts like Advaita Makaranda, Drg Drsya Viveka, Sadhana Panchakam etc.

Currently we are studying the 5th Chapter of the Bhagavad Gita, Atma Bodha and Bhaja Govindam through four hourly sessions every week. The classes can be accessed through the gurukulam’s website, www.arshavm.org

Doctor Soman’s Visit to Eugeneby Amber Howard

Have you ever had someone put three fingers on your wrist and hesitate there for a few moments, then gracefully move away with a slight smile, having just learned your entire life story?

This was the magic I witnessed both personally and as a third party while Dr. Soman, a practicing Ayurvedic physician, spent the weekend in Eugene. Originally from Kerala, India, Dr. Soman currently resides and practies near St. Petersburg, Florida at the Ayurvedic Health Center.Ayurveda is an ancient medicinal art stemming from Vedas, the spiritual teachings of Hinduism. It can be particularly effective with chronic illnesses, those for which other branches of medicine have no remedy. The unique way of working with each person, weaving together information gleaned from the pulse and from the recounting of a patient’s own tale, Dr. Soman personalizes his treatments- something that conventional allopathic medicine has yet to incorporate. As he put it, “The body knows how to heal. All we can do as doctors is to support

it or give it herbs and oils that act as a catalyst, to begin the healing process.”

Dr. Soman commented on this miraculous ability of reading pulses as being one part science, one part intuition and one part genetics. He has been studying Ayurveda since he was 15 years old, and one of his brothers is also a successful physician. After all these years, he has transformed the art into a true skill. After ascertaining a patient’s history via the reading of their pulse, he opts for a variety of treatments depending on the need of the individual. Those with physical body pain were taken into the next room, laid on a table and given a sort of adjustment or body maneuvering, helping to ease tensed muscles or out of place organs back into the respective locations. For others, Dr. Soman prescribed a mix of teas that arrived in the mail to patients’ homes. The mix of herbs chosen, a distinct combination based on the unique ailments and life story of a person, yields healing energy not only of each herb, but also of the mix and how they react together. Also, many people received a small bottle of medicated oil to place on the head.

Not only a superb physician, Dr. Soman is also a very spiritual man, waking to mantra and Hindu prayers each morning and maintaining a deep commitment to his faith. Many of us are looking forward to Dr. Soman gracing our western shores again in March 2010. Those who have had the pleasure of already seeing him, shall benefit from a follow-up treatment, and those who have only heard the stories of

open- mouthed amazement, shall get to see for themselves what an Ayurvedic consultation is all about. For more information about Dr. Soman’s next visit, please call Harinder at 541-345-4952.

Eugene Public Lecture Series by Janie Shuey & Charlie Seitz

We were told by a friend in early 2009 that a teacher from India, who now lived in Georgia, was going to present a series of seminars in Eugene OR later in the spring. After listening to this teacher during those sessions, we immediately felt at home with Sadhviji. As a result of this introduction, we began participating in a weekly study of the Bhagavad Gita with a group of Eugene residents.

We were excited when Sadhviji returned to Eugene this fall to teach and presented a two week series of public lectures exploring the reasons we feel anxiety, how to find inner peace, and an introduction to the teachings of the Vedas. After attending

all of the classes, which were concise and timely for us, we were convinced that our path included studying and learning as much as possible from Sadhviji.

It is not only the wisdom which comes from listening to and learning from Sadhviji that keeps us coming back for more, it is also the spiritual community that each member of the group helps create that makes us feel welcome and at peace when we attend a service or a lecture.

We have missed involvement in a sincere spiritual community since moving to Oregon and can’t emphasize how important this is to us. It’s particularly enlightening to us to begin the process of developing friends who “walk the walk” and endeavor to live their lives consistent with the teachings. We are blessed.

Eugene Gita Home StudyBy Mary Rothbart

The Gita Home Study (GHS) has been meeting in our home in Eugene, Oregon for over five years. We meet once a week for a little over an hour, reading the Gita and Sri Swami Dayanandaji’s commentary. Each person reads aloud, and the verses are chanted. Any questions that arise are sent to Sadhviji by email and her responses are read and distributed to our mailing list. Every year when Sadhviji visits, new members join our group, and there is a large mailing list of people who keep track of GHS events and love to read Sadhviji’s answers to our questions.

Attending GHS grounds us in the teaching, and even when I have felt I did not understand a given commentary, the satisfaction of the study lingers after the class. The Gita and commentary are a continual source of both practical psychology and a guide to maturity and to the attitude of shraddha that bring one closer to the knowledge. This has been an important year for our study because Sadhviji has been staying with us in Eugene, and has attended a number of our classes. Members of GHS are also taking Sadhviji’s intensive course, including Sanskrit, and our pronunciation of the Sanskrit is improving. We have now completed our reading of Chapter 12 of the Gita. This is not an easy chapter, but it is very rich. In this chapter, Arjuna asks Krishna who is better, the one who worships Ishvara through forms, or as formless. Krishna sets aside the question, because the formless is not an object for worship, and the jnani who contemplates

upon the formless is Krishna and is not comparable to the bhakta, the seeker. Instead, Krishna speaks to what Arjuna needs by relating bhakti, or devotion, to preparation for the knowledge and moksha through karma-yogi. Bhakti is not a separate path leading to moksha, but is an attitude or action of the karma yogi who is preparing the mind for the knowledge. Krishna discusses how a person may prepare for moksha by doing yoga asanas, by meditating, by performing all actions for the sake of Ishvara, and by dedicating the results of his or her actions to Ishvara. Although Krishna discusses worshipful renunciation of the fruits of action last, as something the person can do even if s/he cannot perform the earlier practices, he identifies it as the best of the practices. This is due to its results in calming the person, leading the person to acceptance of what happens, and less prone to the ups and downs of pursuing raga-dveshas. The person in this case still pursues activities, but dedicates the results of action to Ishvara. This is something we all can do, and it heartens us that we can prepare ourselves for the knowledge in this way. The last part of Chapter 12 goes back to Chapter 2’s description of the wise person, the jnani. Descriptions of the wise person are not given as as a model for the seeker’s practice to bring about the maturity needed for the knowledge. The descriptions of the jnani include absence of hatred, acting as a compassionate friend, freedom from the notion of “I”, equanimity in both good and bad situations, and accommodation of the good and the bad. The wise person is

always satisfied, free of internal conflict, aware of the nature of the self, and the one who is Brahman. The wise person neither disturbs others nor is disturbed by them, and is free from fear, elation, intolerance and anxiety. S/he is not dependent on others, is clean in body and mind, does not take sides and is able to understand situations as they are. S/he is no longer the doer. The wise one does not become elated and does not grieve, is not hostile and does not desire, and has given up karma through punya and papa. S/he is the same with friend or enemy, in honor or disgrace, cold or heat, pleasure or pain. The Jnani is equable to praise or censure, has the knowledge that is firm and bhakti, devotion. Finally, those who are in keeping with dharma, endowed with shraddha, and firmly committed to Ishvara are the wise persons, and jnanis who are simply following their nature, but who can provide models for the devoted seeker. What I carry away from this chapter is a great sense of optimism, knowing that there is a way to moksha in this life and taught by the Guru and the sruti.

Rathakalpana: Corvallis Retreatby Sri Bhaskar Eldurkar

Sadhviji was here in Eugene on her bi-annual visit to the Pacific Northwest. As usual she was very busy conducting classes as well as engaging the local residents in various recitals and pujas. She graciously accepted our invitation to conduct a retreat in Corvallis for the benefit of residents in the Pacific Northwest. We were very fortunate and honored to have hosted Sadhviji in our house in Corvallis on

October 10th and 11th for a retreat on a passage from Kathopanishad. Sadhviji described the subject as follows: “The Ratha Kalpana” or the chariot imagery is a powerful and profound allegory for leading one's life. In this retreat, we will look in detail about the verses from the Kathopanishad that talk of the imagery and its relevance to one's life and the pursuit of one's goals. The retreat was conducted over 7 hours spread over two days. We had a total of about 25 attendees from Corvallis and Eugene on both the days. We had sumptuous potluck food prepared by the attendees.

Sadhviji, in her inimitable style, expounded on the Ratha Kalpana from Kathopanishad and had her audience spellbound. She started the retreat with a brief prayer and gave a background of the Kathopanishad. She used the first 8 verses from the third Valli to explain how one should lead their life keeping the indriyas under control using the discriminating intellect.

We also had number of questions and she very patiently answered each one of them. On Saturday evening some of us had the benefit of sitting with her after dinner continuing with the satsang. We hope to to have her visit us every year (maybe even more!) and share with us her wisdom.

Family Vedanta West Coast Retreat Reflections 2009

I have attended online classes for a couple of years, and to meet people in person has been a great blessing. Tara

The biggest challenge for me is patience, feeling as if in kindergarten again and realizing I have to sit with this and be patient, that it’s a process. The idea of commitment, I am a commitment-phobe. I think after this retreat I better equipped to overcome this problem Adele

Hear! Tat Tvam AsiFrom the Truth of this

Knowledge There is no retreat Richard

I am really glad I came for the retreat. I wanted to hear talk about life and God. I am grateful to hear Sadhviji express knowledge and I want to be authentic and let the knowledge flow out of me. Ben

I  have  such  gratitude  to  Sadhviji.  My  raga/dveshas  manifested  and  I  had  no  way  to  formulate  questions.  I  now  recognise  that  the  knower  was  being  knocked  off  in  the  process  of  knowing.      Gordon

I  am  very  grateful  I  got  to  be  here.    What  I  am  taking  home  is  a  deeper  understanding  of  sat  and  how  to  integrate  into  daily  life.  .    Shivani

The “Tat Tvam Asi” Retreat by Rich De Angelis

“Upanishad” is a word that rolls off the tongue so easily. But what is its meaning? The word “Upanishad” is usually preceded by another word like Mundaka, Kena, etc. The meaning of the word “Upanishad,” is self-knowledge. The prefix“Upa” means that which is nearest, to me,the self.. The prefix “Ni” means definite knowledge, and the word “shad” means that which destroys samsara totally by showing that one is the whole. How does one go from confusion to understanding and knowing Tat Tvam Asi ? What prevents the teaching of the Upanishads from taking hold?

In deep sleep, there is no problem. Both a king and a beggar rest in the wholeness that is. Only in the waking state. Does there seem to be a problem. Only in the waking state do we have doubts, confusions,and fears. Even hearing the beautiful words of the Upanishads, which say that one is whole and complete, there is still doubt, vagueness, and uncertainty. There is still fear. How is it that the samsara that is not present in the state of sleep appears to loom large in the waking state?.In the sleep state there is no duality, there is only wholeness. This is one’s nature. This is the meaning of the word “I” --whole and limitless, basking

in everything as one.. Upon awaking, the I-thought is as though born. The rampant misidentification with the body-mind-sense complex ensues. From this, it is clear that the separating factor between myself and the whole is ignorance.

As Sadhviji so often says, “Do you wish to seek the finite infinitely or would you rather that your quest of the infinite be a finite quest? We pursue experiences and objects, constantly mistaking the finite to be the infinite and wonder why we are unhappy. When I take things of this world to be the source of happiness, I become an infinite seeker, which keeps me in samsara. Sadhviji uses the expression,“Touch wood:” what is the meaning of this ? When one uses the phrase touch wood, they usually bang on a table or something made of wood. What is often seen is the name and the form of anything that one encounters. What is missed is the substantive. Similarly, when one misses brahman, the locus of all nama-rupa, one misses the understanding of the whole

Sadhviji taught us the vision of the Chandogya Upanishad. To assimilate this vision, a teacher is indeed needed, but it is also very important to discover in oneself a student to receive the teaching. One must discover an inner space after reducing the raga-dvesas (likes and dislikes), and become humble like Svetaketu in order to be firmly established in the vidya. We have the teaching. We have the teacher. We have the means of knowledge. Are we ready to discover the student within?

The Thanksgiving Retreat by Amrita

During the thanksgiving holidays, I went to the west coast retreat with Sadhviji. At first I thought it would be boring, but it was so much fun! Lydia, Penelope and myself had special classes with Subashini. We got to learn South Indian dance and also learned about some traditional stories and the meanings that are interpreted into the dance.

One of the stories was about how a crow was very sad because he thought his feathers were ugly. He took some feathers from a peacock and put them on himself. He thought he looked gorgeous but when his family saw him they were disgusted and sent him away. He was sad but he thought it was not his fault his family did not like him any more. He ran into the peacock and she started laughing at him. He was so sad and then he realized he should be happy with what God has given him. I also got to spend time with Sadhviji and the adults at snack and mealtimes (the food was so good!) and knit by the fireplace. The dorms were really cool and there was an eco-resource room where we could hang out when the adults were in class. We got to perform the skit and a

dance for everyone at the retreat (including residents at the Lost Valley Eco-Village)! Subhashini also performed and it was amazing to see a professional dancer in action. We all dressed up with makeup and saris. It was a lot of fun.

Going on retreat made me feel important and I really learned a lot. When it was time to go home I felt like I had just gotten there. This is definitely something I will do next year.

At the PrecipiceA Poem by Srimati Vasanti Jayaswal

At a time when the clouds of many energies are coming down

When many a wind is blowing all aroundWhen having traced the path to the edge of

the precipiceAnd ready to spread the wings

The infant bird looks up to her mother with a questioning look.

“ You have led me this far, reminding me all the time

That the time to fly has arrived.I have no choice but to fly as a fall is not

what I wishI know not if I can fly.

I do know that it is indeed my wish.It is you who have to give me the lift

And set me free of my cares.Where else will I be flying except towards

you?

Reflections on the RetreatBy Donna Austin

My daughter, Penelope, and I recently attended the Thanksgiving retreat with Sadhviji. It was a blessing to have the retreat close to our home so that we could finally attend after years of hearing about it. The retreat was a wonderful opportunity to focus on listening to the teaching and letting it absorb without the distraction and resulting confusion of everyday life. We both enjoyed the simplicity and quietudes of the retreat.

My daughter’s experience at the retreat was a good one. I watched her be drawn to the teaching and work through some discomfort in a safe and loving environment. Although she cannot articulate why, she loves being in the presence of Sadhviji. She even asked to go to chanting class and tried to keep up with the Sanskrit chants! Seeing her participate in the Indian dancing was quite a gift.For me, hearing the teachings in a series helped things make more sense. It gave me more of a sense of understanding that this is

how things are and how it all ties together. There were times when I was confused and couldn’t keep up with Sadhviji’s quick mind, but I tried to focus on letting it sink in and trusting that the understanding would come.

My understanding became greater after the retreat when I began living with it. The first week I was home I had a deep sense of peace. Although it is waning somewhat, I know it is still there and I can access it when I need to. Life has not been easier for me since I returned from the retreat. What I learned from Sadhviji has allowed me to confront some difficulties in my life that I have been ignoring. I have confronted these difficulties with less fear. Distancing from the problems themselves gives me a clearer mind. The result hasn’t been fewer problems, but I have generated more options to deal with them and more ability to accept my thoughts of what may happen in the future. I know from the teachings that while I have these problems, I am not the problems. Instead, no matter what happens, I am and will still be the whole.

Satsang with SadhvijiA privilege, by definition, denotes an exclusive access to something special --for example: pass to a club, or a drivers license, A privilege is a reward that one is entitled to hold until it is revoked --and a privilege is generally something that is subject to being revoked. As long as one obeys traffic laws, the driver's license is a privilege. You have it till it gets suspended due to too many traffic violations. As long as you obey the rules, you can enjoy the license. You can drive as many times a day, you can drive coast to coast. Besides, you can even use the drivers license for flying in the air by showing it at the airport security as a form of identification. The drivers license enhances your mobility and freedom as long as you respect its parameters. The moment one violates any traffic law, the driver's license can be suspended, leaving one stranded.

In other words, when a privilege is abused, it becomes a shackle. So too in the case of desire. It ceases to be a privilege when you are no longer in command. When you are in the driver's seat, and command the desire, it is still a privilege. You can decide to go after the desire, you can decide to defray the desire, you can desire to not go after the desire. You are in control. But when the desire is in the drivers seat, and it starts to drive you around, it creates inner pressure that do not leave you alone till you fulfill the desire. The pressure-backed desires keeps manifesting over and over and takes over the person. That is when desire ceases to be a privilege, and one becomes hijacked

by the desire --a hapless wayfarer in the grip of robber who steals ones own agency, and threatens to overpower one's own ethical infrastructure that one has worked hard to build throughout one's life. One is pressured to cut corners, and allow the ends to justify the means, to compromise with the means altogether. Therefore to enjoy desire, it is important to keep it as a privilege. A binding desire, like a binding relationship, that binds you to fulfill it

immediately is not a privilege. It cannot set you free.

Studying Sanskrit and Vedanta: A Dynamic DuoBy Dottie Kemp

When I arrived home after two months overseas to discover that Sadhviji was teaching Sanskrit at the Yamada Language Center, University of Oregon, I was struck. How many chances would there be to study with a Sanskrit scholar in Eugene, Oregon in my lifetime? What luck! Count me in!Class had been in session for a week. No problem. Learn a new alphabet. No

worries, small problem. I did not grow up in a Hindi household. Many letters sounded identical to my ear. OK. No problem, go to the teaching website. I listened over and over for hours and hours and slowly the discrimination came. Week 2: Hey I got it. I can write the letters, can hear the sounds. Oh? I’ve got to know the guttural, palatal, and cerebral tongue positions to learn the proper sounds? No problem. I can do that.Week 3: Hey! I got it! Which are aspirated, unaspirated, hard, soft? No problem. I can go back and learn that. But what are those new letters, I wonder? Note: Remember to look up the rules for guna!Week 4: Oh, I get it! When two consonants are together the letter is written differently. Oh. It’s almost an entirely new way of writing letters. OK I can learn that.Week 5: Oh. So you can write the same combinations different ways? Problem.This is, of course not what was going on in class. In class, students were amassing vocabulary, moving through the first 4 conjugations, and merrily learning to translate simple sentences. Our teacher joyfully pointed out what fun it was and I looked around in wonderment. Students were apparently having fun. For me this was not fun, not in the same universe as fun. Enthralling, perhaps. Yet here I am, learning about letting go to learn, learning that over time and exposure magic is happening and things I did not know 6 weeks ago are present in my system. That I feel perpetually behind is a limiting perception so change it. When the ego is dancing to the "I got it" tune, it's a

setup. Drop the likes and dislikes and resistance melts, well, in my case, softens. Our teacher tells us that studying Sanskrit and Vedanta side by side is a dynamic combination. Sanskrit demands fine discrimination, precision, a finely tuned and clear wit, and a sense of humor. This is a splendid adjunct for Vedanta study. To know more of the language of the Vedas

and Upanishads is a blessing. I am blessed. Thank you, Teacher.

Indian Cookery with Mrudulaby Julie Carpenter

An  air  of  expectancy  hung  in  the  air,  fresh  organic  ingredients  lined  the  counters  and  spice  bottles  and  jars  glinted  as  Mrudula  prepared  to  give  the  Cirst  South  Indian  cooking  class  in  a  series  of  six.    On  the  menu  was  Sambar,  Lemon  Rice  and  Eggplant  Sabji  -­‐  some  of  the  Eugene  people’s  favorite  dishes  from  

Mrudula’s  kitchen.    It  should  be  noted  that  every  dish  from  Mrudula’s  kitchen  is  one’s  favourite-­‐-­‐  these  just  happened  to  be  the  favorite  Cirst  week’s  menu  plan.Amidst  10  or  so  students,  Mrudula  calmly  let  those  who  have  learned  to  cook  

using  recipes,  measure  all  the  ingredients,  note  cooking  times,  and  generally  see  if  a  written  recipe  could  be  made  from  watching  live  the  art  of  Indian  cooking.      After  just  one  lesson  we  learned  there  is  no  substitute  for  being  able  to  ask  the  cook  why  there  is  an  order  in  which  things  are  cut,  prepared  and  cooked.    Nor  is  there  another  way  to  experience  for  oneself  the  aromas  and  colors  that  let  one  know  when  spices  are  roasted  or  sautéed  

to  perfection,  and  see  how  texture  and  color  guide  one  to  lower  or  raise  the  heat  or  add  a  little  more  of  this  or  that.The  Indian  cooking  classes  will  continue  on  Saturdays  in  January  2010  from  4  to  6  p.m.  on  the  following  dates:  January  2,  9  16,  23  and  30.  All  classes  are  held  at  1190  W.  27th  Ave  in  Eugene  (Ambika  Shrine  location).  There  is  a  $12  

donation  per  class  and  all  are  invited.    The  monies  go  towards    the  cost  of  the  materials  and  will  include  an  electronic  illustrated  recipe  book  with  detailed  recipes.  Please  call  541-­‐870-­‐9307  if  you  plan  to  attend,  so  the  teacher  can  plan  to  bring  the  right  amount  of  materials.  .    As  all  who  attended  this  Cirst  class  will  certify,    it  will  be  a  lot  of  fun,  and  you  will  

Sadhviji’s Online Vedanta ClassesOffered at www.arshavm.org (all times E.T.) Instructions to enter classroomFrom website click top “Vedanta” tab, then click “online classroom” tab on left, click picture at the bottom of the page, type your name and click “enter.”AtmabodhaOngoing: Tuesday & Thursday 9:-10:00 p.m.Bhagavad Gita: Chapter FiveOngoing: Wednesday 8-8:45 p.m.Bhaja GovindamOngoing: Wednesday 9-10:00 p.m.

Travel and Teaching ScheduleWashington DC (Sri Siva Vishnu Temple)Viveka Chudamani, 9: a.m. to 12:30 p.m first Sat and Sun of each month.January 9-10; February 6-7; March 6-7; April 3-4; May 8-9, June 5-6.For more information call Ms Charu Narasimhan at 703-338-5637; www.ssvt.org