steps to preserving your marriage. step one: be loving
TRANSCRIPT
Steps to Preserving Your Marriage
Step One:
Be Loving
Step One: Be Loving
Love is the basic foundation upon which a marriage is built.
If there is no love, then there should be no wedding.
Step One: Be Loving
The husband is to love his wife . . . Eph 5:25-29
The way Christ loved the church.
As he loves himself.
As a cherished possession.
Step One: Be Loving
The wife is to love her husband. Titus 2:4
Step One: Be Loving
Show your love to your spouse. Husbands, your words and actions will show
your wives how much you truly love them. Wives, your words and actions will show
your husbands how much you truly love them.
Step One: Be Loving
If the husband loves his wife as Christ illustrated and the wife loves her husband as God instructed, then their marriage will be preserved and protected against the outside attacks of the world.
Step Two:
Be Selfless
Step Two: Be Selfless
Selflessness should be a virtue of every husband and every wife.
Selflessness simply means to be concerned more with the needs and wishes of others than with your own needs and wishes.
Step Two: Be Selfless
“Let no one seek his own, but each one the other’s well-being.” 1 Cor 10:24
“Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.” Phil 2:4
Step Two: Be Selfless
Selflessly provide for the other's needs. Provide for their emotional needs. Provide for their affectionate needs.
1 Pet 3:7; Eph 5:25-29; Titus 2:4 Provide for their intimate needs.
1 Cor 7:2-5 Provide for their physical needs.
Step Two: Be Selfless
When one or the other spouse is selfish, the marriage relationship will suffer and many needs will go unfulfilled.
However, when both the husband and the wife possess the quality of selflessness, then all needs will be met and the marriage will be preserved.
Step Three:
Be Kind
Step Three: Be Kind
Abuse within a marriage can come in three different forms: Physical abuse Mental abuse Emotional abuse
Step Three: Be Kind
Consider the following definitions: Abusive - “1. involving or characterized by
abuse or misuse; abusing; mistreating 2. coarse and insulting in language; scurrilous; harshly scolding” (Webster’s New World Dictionary)
Abuse is defined as “1. to use wrongly; misuse 2. to hurt by treating badly; mistreat 3. to use insulting, coarse, or bad language about or to; scold harshly; revile” (Webster’s New World Dictionary)
Step Three: Be Kind
It is a sin for either the husband or the wife to abuse their spouse. The husband violates 1 Peter 3:7 and
Ephesians 5:28-29. The wife violates Ephesians 5:22-24, 33 and
Titus 2:4-5.
Step Three: Be Kind
You will not remain in fellowship with God if you abuse your spouse. Romans 1:28-32 - “. . . strife, . . .
violent, . . . unmerciful” - acts of the ungodly. The ungodly is not in fellowship with God. (Cf. 1 John 1:5-7)
Galatians 5:19-21 teaches that hatred, wrath, and strife will keep people out of the kingdom of Heaven.
Step Three: Be Kind
A husband and a wife should let their speech be seasoned with salt. Colossians 4:6 - “Let your speech always be
with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one.”
Ephesians 4:29 - “Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.”
Step Three: Be Kind
Apply the principles of Romans 12:9-21. “Let love be without hypocrisy.” vs 9 “Be kindly affectionate to one another with
brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another;” vs 10
“Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.” vs 14
“Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.” vs 15
Step Three: Be Kind
Apply the principles of Romans 12:9-21. “Be of the same mind toward one
another . . .” vs 16 “Do not be wise in your own opinion.” vs
16 “Repay no one evil for evil.” vs 17 “Have regard for good things in the sight of
all men.” vs 17
Step Three: Be Kind
Apply the principles of Romans 12:9-21. “If it is possible, . . . live peaceably with all
men.” vs 18 “Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but
rather give place to wrath; for it is written, ‘Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,’ says the Lord.” vs 19
“Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” vs 21
Step Three: Be Kind
If the husband and the wife will be kind, avoiding any and all types of abusive behavior or speech, then the marriage will be preserved.
Step Four:
Be Faithful
Step Four: Be Faithful
Christians should understand what it means to be faithful. Our relationship with our Heavenly Father is
that of faithfulness. We are to worship no other gods. We are to put no one or nothing in front of
our service to God. We know what it means to be faithful.
Step Four: Be Faithful
When a man and woman marry, they are making a commitment to remain faithful to each other. “For better or worse, for richer or poorer,
through sickness and in health, till death do us part.”
When a husband or wife fails to honor their marriage vows or promises, then they are in violation of their marriage vows. They are no longer being faithful.
Step Four: Be Faithful
The Bible teaches that Christians are to be trustworthy and faithful. Christians are supposed to speak the truth
with all men. Eph 4:25 Jesus said, “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and
your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” Matt 5:37
Step Four: Be Faithful
The bride and the groom will vow: To leave father and mother. To provide for the physical needs. To provide for the emotional needs. To provide for the sexual needs. To love their spouse above
anyone else.
Step Four: Be Faithful
Honor your vow to your spouse. Husbands, do not treat another woman the
way you treat your wife. Husbands, do not allow another woman to
take the place of your wife. Wives, do not treat another man the way
you treat your husband. Wives, do not allow another man to take the
place of your husband.
Step Four: Be Faithful
A husband and wife who truly love each other will remain faithful, fulfilling the promises made when they said, “I do.”
When both the husband and the wife remain true and faithful to their word and commitment, their marriage will be preserved and protected.
Conclusion
To Help Preserve Your Marriage . . .
Be Loving
Be Selfless
Be Kind
Be Faithful