self as an instrument of change

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SELF AS INSTRUMENT OF CHANGE | Kim Morgan OWNER & DIRECTOR

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Page 1: Self as an instrument of change

SELF AS INSTRUMENT OF CHANGE | Kim MorganOWNER & DIRECTOR

Page 2: Self as an instrument of change
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“Any leader of transformation needs to learn the psychology of individuals, the psychology of the group, the psychology of society and the psychology of change.”

W. Edwards Deming

…AND THE PSYCHOLOGY OF THEMSELVES.

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Use of self is central to

our work

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WAIT – Why Am I Talking?

High Quality Attention

Questions - but not for the purpose of gathering information for you

Questions which advance the thinking of the other person

Sit on the edge of your chair and demonstrate fascination

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Coach as an Instrument of Change:

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EMOTION DISCOMFORT TRANSFORMATION

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“We remember life’s important moments especially well. Emotional experiences, whether good or bad, leave strong traces in the brain.”

Joseph E. LeDouxCentre for Neural Science, NYU

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Mezirow | Situations which give rise to critical self-reflection and transformational learning:

▪ A disorienting dilemma

▪ A state of puzzlement

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Jarvis | Non-transformative situations:

“Non-learning is our response to everyday experience. As long as experience conforms toour mental models, no learning is required.”

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“Presence is the living embodiment of knowledge: the theories and practices believed to be essential to bring about change… are manifested, symbolized or implied in the presence of the consultant”

Nevis

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Provide a presence that is lacking in the system

Develop congruence between your behaviour and what you teach others

Become an awareness expert

Help the client focus on their problems not on solutions you favour

Role model basic behavioural skills (communication, conflict, decisions)

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Coach as an Instrument of Change:

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Burke | Coach as an Instrument of Change:

Ability to tolerate ambiguity

Ability to discover and mobilize human energy

A sense of mission

Ability to recognize own feelings and intuitions quickly

Ability to create learning opportunities

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CAN YOU HANDLE EMOTION?

ARE YOU READY FOR DISCOMFORT?

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De Haan | Transformational moments occur when:

▪ Tensions, uncertainties and anxieties arise

▪ The coaching relationship is put to the test

▪ A particular vulnerability is examined

▪ The coach accesses their own emotions

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“The primary instrument in coaching is the coach/practitioner.”

Burke

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WHO YOU ARE IS HOW YOU COACH

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PERFECTIONISMPEOPLE PLEASING

OSTRICH

SYNDROME

GOING TOEXCESS

IMPOSTOR SYNDROME

COPING WITH LOSS

SEARCHING FOR FULFILMENT

DRIVEN BY FEAR

FIERCE INDEPENDENCE

CYNICISM

PERFORMANCE ANXIETY

PROCRASTINATION

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“Learn your theories as well as you can, but put them aside when you touch the miracle of the living soul.”

Jung

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Group Dynamics - the composite affect on feelings and behaviour of the unconscious processes of the group.

“The whole is greater than the sum of its parts.”

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• Underpinning assumptions

• Behaviour as a function of person in their environment

• Coalitions

• Roles and “Black Sheep” syndrome or scapegoating

• In crowd/out crowd

• Group Think

• Homeostasis

• Transference

• Projection

• Idealization of “leader” (YOU!)

• Unconscious communication

AWARENESS OF:

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How to increase self-knowledge:

Reflective Practice

Power and boundary issues

Integrate personal and family history into a source of strength

Awareness of self and awareness of regret/lack of effectiveness

Self-care

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Awareness of the impact we make

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Choice about how we use our impactChoice about ourresponse

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Getting ‘Hooked’ |Loss of ability to choose our responses:

AuthorityConflictIntimacyFearEgo

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Where am I reactive?

When was the last time I got hooked by someone?

What hooked me? Judgments, thoughts / feelings?

What happened to my ability to choose my behaviour?

What can I learn from this?

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Reflection exercise in pairs:

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Developing instrumentality:Commitment to ongoing technical expertise and self-knowledge.It starts here….

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Kim Morgan

Director of Barefoot Coaching Ltd

@BarefootCoaches

www.barefootcoaching.co.uk Available now on Amazon