AMERICA

The People of Walmart -

2011

presents

You have no

idea how

exhausting it

can be putting

on tight purple

sweat pants!! 

Pensacola ,

Florida

Don't laugh!  Its okay,

because  today is

combination Casual

Friday and Crazy Hair

Day, all rolled into

one. 

College Station,  Texas 

Where exactly does

one buy a short pink

outfit like this to

beef shop in? 

Birmingham ,

Alabama   

Britney Spears let

herself

go….. again.  

Slidell , Louisiana

Packing this rear in

camouflage shorts is

like trying to hide an

elephant behind a

squirrel. 

Seattle, Washington

And men claim they

can't meet classy

women anywhere? 

Go figure!  

Louisville ,

Kentucky

Is that a THONG

Ollie Hopnoodle is

wearing?? 

I can't look again

or I'll go blind. 

Mountain Brook,

Alabama

For my own sanity, I

have to assume that

Gussie Klothgrunt is

shoplifting two pork

roasts in her shirt ...

simply because there

is no possible way

that can be anything

other than two pork

roasts in her shirt. 

Can't be!  

Forestdale , Alabama 

No way, Laquanda,

absolutely not!  That

outfit does not at all

make you look like a

Hooker. 

Midlothian, Virginia   

It's like a big pink

garbage bag filled

with creamed corn

and door knobs.  

Houston , Texas   

This is perfectly

understandable.  This

one was just on her

way to the Country

Club when she

remembered she

needed some coffee

and a couple of yoga

videos.  Besides, she

thought to herself, I'll

just throw on these

gray shorts and I'll be

smokin'.   Nashville ,

Tennessee 

Is that a baby

dangling from

Raylene's waist like a

fanny pack???  I don't

believe I've ever seen

anything like that

before.  The only

thing wrong with the

gene pool around the

Ozarks

is there's no

lifeguard.    

Fort Smith, Arkansas

  

I love talking with

Freidagurtz

Finkelstein, because

she always seems so

surprised and

interested in what I

have to say.  

Grand Rapids ,

Michigan

Holy Golden

Delusions of

Grandeur, I gotta get

me that outfit!!!!  

Alpharetta , Georgia

Either that lady has a

tail or Barney is stuck

where the sun doesn't

shine.  

Loves Park , Illinois

Now I'm not sure

what kinky Bathsheba

Squeal plans to do

with that pie filling,

but there is just

something about her

that tells me she

doesn't bake, she

doesn't watch

Rachael Ray, and she

has no intention of

using that pie filling

in the kitchen.  

La Verne , California

I have infinite

admiration for the

sheer strength of good

quality denim. 

Moreover, I will be

eternally thankful if

Honeysuckle's jeans

wait until she reaches

the truck to explode. 

Seriously,

they should consider

using denim on the

next NASA space

shuttle.  

Spring, Texas

Someone else can

try to figure out

what she's doing,

because I have to go

wash my

 eyes out with

bleach - like RIGHT

NOW!!