Our Common Predicament: a psychodynamic perspective

from Daniel Keeran, MSW, President,

College of Mental Health Counseling

Because of loss of parental caring, we may be attracted to a partner whom we

perceive to be uncaring yet somehow (perhaps unconsciously) familiar to us, and

we may perceive this partner as less caring than they are. One may confuse

unfinished anger toward the uncaring parent with anger toward the perceived

uncaring partner.

Who can deliver us from our predicament if not we ourselves? Remember, the

predicament of the perceived uncaring partner is just as grave, for s/he must

consider why s/he was chosen and also chose the other, as well as the dynamics

of symmetry and complementary interactive patterns in the relationship.

Must we extend grace to each other in order remain in relationship? No doubt,

yet grace does not excuse or relieve us from our predicament and may at times

involve careful reasoned confrontation of ourselves and others.

- a counsellor at WWW.CTIHALIFAX.COM